IN Those days, the Pelhamites being gathered together, from the east and from the west, from the north and from the south; Stephen the Burronite, being the Prophet of Pelham, ascended the hay-mow, and lifted up his voice, saying, "hear ye the voice of the Lord which crieth against the Pelhamites—for the anger of the Lord smoaketh with furious indignation against you, for the follies, which you committed against the Lord, and against his anointed. For verily, saith the Lord, I have given you my prophets, rising up early, and send­ing them: But the first^* you soon rejected: —The second,^† on account of your cruel­ty, I took to myself:—The third:^‡ you drove away with great wrath, and pursued with great rage, malignity, and uproar."— "Then," said the Lord "I will give them [Page 4] a Minister like unto themselves, full of all deceit, hypocrisy, and duplicity. But, whom, among all the sons of men, shall I send?" Then came there fourth a lying spirit, and stood before the Lord, saying, "I will go forth, and be a spirit in the mouth of Stephen the Burronite." And the Lord said "go"—Then arose up Ste­phen the Burronite, of the tribe of the Pu­ritans, and family of Ishmael, and went forth to Pelham, sorely oppressing the Pel­hamites, taking from them ten shekels of silver, a mighty fine horse, and changes of raiment, and ran off to Rutland.

Then the Pelhamites were moved with rage, like the moving of the trees of the forest by a mighty tempest, and gathered themselves together, and pursued their Prophet down to Rutland. And now, I your prophet and minister, being ascended on the hay-mow, declare unto you, that I see an angel flying through heaven, crying "wo! wo! wo! to the Pelhamites. The first wo is past, but behold two other woes shall come, which will sweep you away with a mighty besom of destruction." Then arose up Nehemiah the son of Nehemiah, Daniel the son of John, and John the son [Page 5] of John, who was a trader in potash, and were about to lay violent hands on the Prophet. Then the Prophet lift up his rod, which he held in his hand, and smote John,^* the trader in potash, across the right arm, and broke it asunder, but the rod breaking and falling out of his hand, he caught up a great mill-stone, and cast it on the head of Nehemiah^† and sunk him to the ground.

This Rutland being a land of hills and vallies, where groweth the sycamore tree, the fir tree, and the shittim wood, by the way side, as thou goest unto DAN, which in the Hebrew is called Abandone, but in Syriac Worcester; it being the place of a skull: And not that DAN, which is called by Tom Paine and Philistines, Laish. The Prophet travelling through this land by the way of UR of the CHALDEANS, sought him five smooth stones out of the brook, and put them into his wallet; lest haply, SY­HON king of Heshbon; and OGG king of Bashan, should come out against him. But it went out all round about the land of E­dom, saying "the BURRONITE is not, but is [Page 6] fled, and gone over the brook Cedron:" Therefore, they blew a trumpet, saying, "Every man to his tent, O Pelhamites!" So they all went up from following after the Prophet; but when they came to the pass of Jourdan, behold, a strong army had taken possession of the ford of the river! at which the Pelhamites were sore dismay­ed, and sought by guile to deceive the army of the Lincolnites; therefore, they say unto the Lincolnites, "We be strangers from a far country, with old shoes, and clouted on our feet." Then said the Lincolnites unto the men of Pelham, "say Faith!" Then the Pelhamites said, "fath," for they could not say faith. Then the Lincolnites knew them to be Pelhamites, and fell upon them and slew them, so that not one was left to "piss against the wall." When it was told in Pel­ham, saying, "our old men are slain, and our young ones are carried away into cap­tivity, and our holy places are polluted with the abomination which maketh desolate, there was great lamentation, weeping, and wailing; every family mourned apart, and their wives apart—and their mourning was like the mourning of Hadradimmon in the valley of Megidon;"—and they said "alas! [Page 7] for the glory is departed from Pelham; the second wo, which the Prophet foretold is sure­ly come upon us; and when the third wo shall come who shall be able to stand?—The beau­ty of Pelham is slain upon the high places! is slain! is slain upon East-Hill. The GRAYS, the Mc. MULLENS, the HINDSES, and the KONKEYS, are fallen upon the dark mount­ains of the Shadow of death! Tell it not in Greenwich, publish it not in Leverett, lest the daughters of the uncircumscribed re­joice: alas, for our wives and our little ones!" So the hearts of the Pelhamites were troubled, and they all drew around the altar of ST. PATRIC, and bowed down be­fore the altar, saying, "O great spirit! how have we offended, that thou hast left us to be destroyed by our enemies! Shall we go up again to fight against the Lincolnites, and shall we prosper?" But they received no answer, by Urim nor Thummim, by voices nor dreams; and the Pelhamites were greatly dismayed. Then said Ahab the Tishbite, "Hear, O Pelhamites! There liv­eth in the wilderness of Sin, as thou goest unto the land of Shinar, a cunning woman, whose name is GOODY MC. FALL, who has a familiar, and dwelleth alone, even with [Page 8] her cat: To this woman let the fathers and leaders of the tribe of Pelham repair, and peradventure she may tell us what we ought to do."—Then the chief men of Pelham, captains of tens, captains of twelves, and captains of twenties, arose up and disguised themselves in the habits of honest men, and went forth to Goody Mc. Fall, saying, "Bring us up a spirit,"—And she said "Whom shall I bring up?" And they say unto her "Bring up Father ABECROM­BIE" Then Goody Mc. Fall laid hold of her instrument of Enchantment, and stam­ped on the ground, and then cried out alas! for you have deceived me, for you are Pelham­ites, and not honest men. And they said un­to her "fear not." Then the ground was troubled, and began to move—and they said unto her, "Whom sawest thou?" And she said, "Abecrombie." Then came there forth old Father Abecrombie; and with a countenance which made the Pelham­ites quake with fear, said, "Why hast thou troubled me, even in my grave?" Then answered the Pelhamites, and said "Because we are sore troubled:—We have fallen by the hands of the Lincolnites, and when we enquired at the altar of our great Prophet, [Page 9] we were not answered by Urim nor Thum­mim, by voices nor dreams."—Then said Abecrombie, "You shall go out tomor­row against the Lincolnites, and shall fall by their hands, and be utterly destroyed— your wives and your little ones shall be led away into captivity, for your measure of in­iquity is full." Then the men of Pelham ▪ fell all along on the ground, and their hearts sunk within them—Then fear and sore dis­may spread through all the town of Pelham, and the Pelhamites fled into the wilderness, and hid themselves in caves and holes of the earth. And lo! it was told in the army of the Lincolnites, saying, "The Pelhamites have fled.'! Then arose up the Lincolnites and pursued after the men of Pelham, sorely discomfiting them, and led many away cap­tive to the city of Dan. Then Benjamin the Lincolnite blew a trumpet, and all the men left pursuing after the Pelhamites. And the Pelhamites who were carried away captive to the city of Dan, besought JAMMY the Bostonian, saying, "We be evil men, deal­ing in lies and wickedness; we have sought to destroy the goodness of the land! we dig­ged a pit and fell therein; we have trusted to St. Patrick to deliver us, but he has ut­terly [Page 10] forsaken us;—therefore, O JAMMY, in thy wrath remember mercy, and we will leave assembling ourselves together to talk politics, and follow our occupation of raising potatoes."—Then JAMMY the Bostonian had compassion on the Pelhamites.

They then sung the following hymn, af­ter which, the Prophet passed out of their hands and fled from their sight.