DIANA's SHRINES TURNED INTO READY MONEY, BY PRIESTLY MAGIC; OR, VIRTUE GIVEN UP.
Being Remarks on Remarks on the NORTHERN PRI [...]'s Pamphlet, entitled, A—a known to the A—ts.
In a LETTER to the AUTHOR.
In which is contained an impartial APPENDIX, setting forth the RIGHT of the the British Parliament, as well as the real Advantages that would arise to the honest Merchant, by the Prevention of the iniquitous Practice of Smuggling.
Tangeret Poculum, Denariosq tangere debet.
NEW-YORK: Printed in the Year MDCC,LXXIII.
I RECEIVED your Favor per Post, with the inclos'd Manuscript, entitled, ‘Diana's Shrines turned into Ready Money, &c.’ Have readily sent you the Forty Dollars you demanded, by Mr. M— for which desire you to give him Receipt. On the lay you propose, (notwithstanding you have not the Consent of the Author to publish it) on Account of the Expence you have been at, as well as the strenuous Opposition and ungenerous Treatment you met with from one of your BOSTON CLERGYMEN, and Threats from others, who have, on other Occasions, been very sanguine for the Liberty of the Press) I shall send you Five Hundred struck off by Mr. G— who goes to Rhode-Island, and from thence to Boston. If at any Time Difficulty should arise on like Occasion, I shall be glad to serve you.
To Mr. E. RUSSELL, Printer in Boston.
DIANA's SHRINES TURNED INTO READY MONEY.
YOUR illustrious Performance exhibited to the Public on that most important question, whether A—a was known to the A—s, reflects the highest honor not only to you but to your ancient, worthy, and venerable Predecessors, and may well be tacked as an appendix to the wondrous Magnalia: Herein is verified that saying, Every generation grows wiser and wiser. It must afford ample satisfaction not only to the inquisitive Gentleman you mean to gratify, but fill the whole world with wonder and amazement at the gross stupidity and indolence of many centuries past. Worthy and great Writers have always had envious opponents, and in proportion to their great and serviceable discoveries and endeavors for the welfare of the community expect their attacks: But what shall we say of such men who are continually emitting their contagious poison? You doubtless remember the saying of the Poet,
Cicero says a libel in his day, which took [Page 6] away a man's good name was punished with death. By this means the honor of families are ruined, and highest posts and greatest titles are rendered cheap and vile in the sight of the people, the noblest virtues and most exalted parts exposed to the contempt of the vicious and ignorant. And as this cruel practice tends to the utter subversion of all truth and humanity among us, it deserves the utmost detestation, abhorrence and discouragement of all who have either the love of their country or the honor of their religion at heart.
These men together with their adherents who take pleasure in reading them, may be justly ranked with the murderer and assassin. Every good man sets as high a value on his name as on his life, and those who privily assault the one would destroy the other, could they do it with the same secrecy and impunity. How many there are of this character among us public pamphets and news-papers manifestly evince. O tempora! O mores!
I need not here remind you of the vast disproportion between a libel against goverment and a private member of community. That you may be armed against an assault of this nature, remember that a private desire of resentment subdued denominates a man great, And that if you are led away with the censures or applauses of men, when wisdom shall be justified of her children you will be found destitute of those graces which adorn human nature.
Having had an opportunity of knowing [Page 7] the sentiments, with regard to your motives, of a number of persons of the above described character, I shall here present you a specimen of a few of them for your animadversion.
Some say you have catched an epidemical distemper called by Juvenal an itch of writing.
Some say you have long in vain been in pursuit of a Diploma from North-Britain, but despising the modern method of obtaining it, continue impatiently seeking it through the channel of merit.
Some say you expressed a huge fancy to be chose President of Harvard-College, and that you are now endeavoring to convince the honorable Electors of their egregious mistake in not calling you to that important trust.
Some say you are encouraged from the effects of a former harangue on Liberty, productive of a boon.
Others that one of the BEST of men is the intended object of your keen resentment.
Others that you are employed as a Popish Incendiary to foment strife.
Others are so ill natured as to say you are influenced by the fair Daughters of Liberty, on whose account you have already suffered a dire flogging at an ecclesiastical council.
Cum multis aliis quae nunc prescribere won't do.
These are some of the surmises of this rude herd with regard to your motives: Nor do I find their sentiments with regard to your most excellent Performance more favorable; for in general they say, their expectations being raised to the highest pitch (from the name of the Author and grandeur of the subject) [Page 8] they are as greatly disappointed as at the production of Aesop's teaming mountain.
You'll need abundance of grace and patience while I transcribe their arguments against you. The learned Keckerman, you say, judges that A—a was known to the A—ts. They say you begin well; but you should have let them known he was infallible. You go on and say, if the matter be examined with judgment and proper care and accuracy, we shall find reason to believe that this large part of the world was really known to the A—ts.
How honest Madoc came to take it into his head to visit A—a you don't know, nor how he got out of it you can't tell; but he left monuments of the British language and customs. What of the language found among the Indians you do not say; nor customs, whether eating when hungry, or Priests sporting with their female parishioners. But they ask, upon supposition it were true that Madoc was in A—a, does that prove your point?
As to Eslotiland, it being agreed by all to be part of A—, as you say, the point must be given up, as it was discovered by the Frizeland Fishermen and the Polonian, ever since the year 1456: But they say you beg the question, and it seems they had such a knowledge of it, that they nor their neighbors ever troubled their heads any further with it.
L. Anneus Seneca, you say, foretold that another world should be found out, and in one of his dramatic pieces, says, Thyphis [Page 9] should discover new worlds; but what that can be to your purpose they can't tell, unless he did discover new Worlds and A—a was included in the number.
As to Metellius Celer, Proconsul of Gaul having a number of Indians presented him by the Suevian King, you imagine them wafted by violent gales of long continuance (they suppose in Indian canoes with large stores of provisions) from Labrador or Newfoundland to the German shore. This seems to appear very strange to 'em▪ and fancy they must have had wet hides now and then: But they seem inclined to think you are not well skill'd in the geography of this part of the globe, or with the turbulence of the atlantic ocean, and rather think they came from Lunar Hesperia, as frogs are said to descend ex nubibus in a shower of rain. But suppose it true, what kind or degree of knowledge could the Suevians have had from those rude savages?
Mention, you say, has been made repeatedly of two islands called Atlantides, ten thousand stadia distant from Lybia, and called by Pliny, Hesperides, which the learned Ortellius supposes to be the islands of Hispaniola and Cuba, and Diadorus Siculus tells us that the people of those islands in habit places near the ocean, and therefore they must be the inhabitants of Cuba because surrounded by the ocean. ‘Here were the [...] fields, the seat of the blessed, and, as the above author says, the inhabitants were very happy indeed.’ Logical arguing, deservant of a Presidentship!
[Page 10] Plato has given particular account, you say, of the Atlantic Island, as published by Serranus, and of its being peopled by Neptune with children begot of a mortal woman. They say one would think you were in one of your youthful freaks, and imagined the gods were subject to like passions with yourself. They say if they understand you right the argument stands thus: Neptune was an ancient god, from his nature must have known the extent of his jurisdiction, the atlantic ocean being bound west on the A—an shore, of consequence he must have known it; therefore A—a was known to the A—ts. That it received its name from King Atlas, and Hercules pillars was ‘its eastern bounds; that it was a most broad island, had powerful kings, and what else they cannot tell, except they had grievous wars, in which the Athenians oppos'd themselves and became conquerors. Plato, you say, is not singular herein, but Strabo and Pliny confirm it.’ They say you do them great honor. Plato says further, the greatest island of the western ocean was lost, situated between the Azores and Canaries, and that there were ‘reliques of it, you say, Becman thought, believed, and says might be lengthily proved.’
‘Hoffman and Bochart are of opinion that Plato's atlantis is to many A—a: And indeed, you say, if it was larger than Lybia and Asia it looks as if it were really A—.’ Thus you are endeavoring to prove, that what is now and ever was unknown to [Page 11] us a sunken island was known, in order to prove that the terra firma on which we now dwell was known to the A.....ts.
The probability arising from the accounts of passages of vessels through the atlantic one way and the other must be barely probable, and of Endoxus's voyage in the days of our Grandfathers to Cales must have been round by the edges as St. Paul's voyages were, or by lucky chance.
But now you call, they say, to a respectful notice of Hanno, the famous Carthagenian, who wrote Periplum, which has not been your lot to see, and therefore can make no observations. 'Tis a pity! But you say he gives an account of a voyage prosecuted around the coast of Africa, and found lands in the atlantic ocean. Surely it was a spaerical round, if he found any of the main of A.....a.
But we must not omit to take notice, that the Phoenicians must have had the knowledge of it, for Diadorus Siculus beforementioned in his De fabulosis antiquorum gestis) says, that certain Phoenicians were cast on a most fertile island opposite to Africa, and you, to accommodate yourself, note that if it was opposite to Africa it must have been an A.....n island: But pray, Reverend Sir, with profound submission, why not one of the Azores, or even St. Helen's? And if so, no wonder the Phoenicians did not divulge A.....a to the Europeans.
Upon supposition that Silenas gave Midas information, as you say, that Europe, Asia, [Page 12] and Africa were islands, and of the existence of another world whose magnitude was immense and infinite, will it follow from thence that A.....a was known to the A.....ts? Do not you Priests preach up unknown worlds, and some of you live as though you were not willing to part with a certainty for an uncertainty?
As for Hanuo's voyage beforerementioned, when you leave the Herculian pillars, the ne plus ultra, you find about ten thousand stadia from Lybia the large islands of Atlantides; but going again to reconnoitre them, on your return, say you can't find 'em, to your great disappointment, and conclude they are destroyed by a flood or earthquake: Surely, they say, it must have been Cape Flyaway, frequently seen by mariners in the atlantic ocean. And further, this voyage has misled you a thousand stadia from your point, and no wonder, since they must have been destitute of a compass: For leaving Lybia on the left (the coast lying nearly north and south) and sailing thirty days (meet with impediments, and no doubt it was very lucky if they ever found their way back, though you don't say they ever did; but you might have made the story for them as you did for Madoc) steer south. If Lybia was on the left their course must have been nearly south, notwithstanding which, you imagine it probable that they must have found some of the A—an islands, or some part of the western continent itself, which they say must be as impossible as for designing Priests to receive the rewards of the faithful.
[Page 13] Grotius's conception of the peopling A.....a from Europe (notwithstanding what you have said of Serranus) upon supposition that Hispaniola and Cuba were the seats of the blessed as you imagine, and as you say the rout is possible and not unnatural, passing from Europe through Norway into Iceland, thence by Frizeland into Greenland, and so into Estotiland, must needs make a dreary travel for the heavenly Pilgrims: No wonder the emigrants never returned to give account of their situation, in this new Jerusalem. How greatly doth it dignify the Priesthood that the rewards of virtue are so much more easily obtained in these modern days!
They readily allow that A—a was well peopled four or five thousand years ago, and that when Columbus arrived here he found multitudes of inhabitants: But what is that to your purpose? You have been endeavoring to prove they originated from Europe, and where not, though they have chosen to omit it 'till now. But does Columbus say he found any of his countrymen among them, any Whites, or any others that could give any account of their rise from Europe, or any other of the known part of the globe? If he had you would undoubtedly have snap'd at it, they say, to help you out of the sudds, and they wonder you did not assert that he did.
As to your suppositions, conjectures, and deductions with regard to Gog, Magog, &c. they are so various, and all drawn to help your important cause, they say they are not worthy an answer, and had you ever read [Page 14] the 38th and 39th chapters of Ezek. you would have been better informed. How inconsistent the glorious rise of the western empire from that race, with the 39th chapter from 11th to 17th verse, unless your fertile brain produces a Phoenix. But however, there seems to be one observation of Dr. Grew's worthy of note, which you seem to hug as making much to your point, namely, that there were no Blacks found in A.....a, and you therefore observe there could be no removes from Africa. But pray, learned Sir, with defference to your superior knowledge in antiquity, were there found any Whites? and if not, why does not the argument bear as much against the supposed removes from Europe? But, pray Sir, how came the inhabitants yellow? They are of opinion, you imagine, by their carrying on their backs large packs of provision and necessary cloathing for the performance of their long travel, as you have chaulk'd out the road, their hides by intermitting colds and heats were gradually tann'd and became so.
As to what you advance from the Scriptures and progress of the Apostles, they leave your best friends to judge of its absurdity. How are the sacred Scriptures tortur'd and warp'd to base purposes! No wonder they are held in such contempt by the undescerning part of mankind, when Priests would cram down any thing for truth that suits their turn; and they imagine your lugging in the Scriptures to help you (had you a common chance) would have been a great [Page 15] disservice to Christianity, and overballance all the service you ever did its cause. Thus, they say, you have been racking your brain to prove your motto false, by proving, Aliquid tam difficile est quod quaerendo investigari non possit. Surely by the ancients you must have meant the original inhabitants of A—a. They express themselves as though Brother C—r has set you ageg to display your lustre, as he takes you now and then for a foil for his own. How easily are inconsiderate men ensnar'd in the trap of vain glory! And what could have induc'd you to have gone so far beyond your line, but predominant pride, which such Priests are so ready to condemn in the Laity? of whom you take all advantages from your pulpits, branding them with the odious epithets of children of the Devil, while you only are the sons of light. Thou that teacheth another, teacheth thou not thyself, &c. They query, if St. Paul and other Apostles were accounted the filth of the world, and offscouring of all things, pray what appellation are you deservant of?
APPENDIX.
AS to your Appendix, notwithstanding your zeal and strength of argument with regard to your Remarks should recommend them to every considerate and worthy member of A.....a, your moderation being known to all men, they seem to treat them with undeserved contempt, and say the bitter complaint you make of the hard treatment the A—ans have suffer'd have been so often advanc'd and nothing new therein brought to light, either to augment or redress them, there needs but few observations.
As to your query, "What hurt does my writing do?" They answer, neither good nor hurt, but your views and designs are what they detest. What hurt in setting Britain and A—a by the ears? the peaceful gospel you preach teaches you agreable thereto, for you bend it which way you please. The good esteem of the High Sons, or in other words, a good reward is all you care for, they say. Commending your cunning to prevent drowning, you wisely omit touching on the tender point of Legislative Right as past your depth; but, they say, you discover your self as well skil'd in the mystery of merchandize as in the science and art of geography and navigation, when you assert that the A—ans have suffer'd great loss by the Britons in their trade and commerce. Pray, Dr. Knowall, [Page 17] who is it takes our naval stores, oil, bone, masts, timber, and other exports off our hands? And what are the inducements but proposal of mutual benefit? Who loses when A—an Merchants fail thousands sterling in debt to Britain? And though you fleer at the Legislative Authority of Parliament, by saying, "Let its favorers call it supream if they will," they would ask you a few questions in their turn; "and what hurt in it?" Pray, Rev. Sir, what idea can you form of a King or Sovereign destitute of power or authority over his subjects?
How is the dignity of the Crown and nation to be supported? Suppose his Majesty's ships and armies were disbanded, what a figure would Britain cut among the neighboring nations?
How is the immense expence attending to be provided for, but by tax on the subjects? Why should A—a be exempt, who have equally the benefit of defence? "Why forsooth, because they took Cape-Briton in the year 1745," though they had the assistance of Admiral Warren, and a number of the King's ships, and great part of their charge was reimbursed by the Commons of Britain. You further add, it would be wisdom in Britain to lay not so much as one burthen upon them: Well judged, Mr. Dictator.
Has the insignificant Parliament of Great- Britain power to lay a tax on the national exports? Do the A—an Merchants voluntarily submit to such tax, when they purchase the British exports? If so, then let the following [Page 18] considerations be attended to, removing all party prejudice;
A's a Fair Trader.
B's a Smuggler.
C's a Purchaser of the Importer.
A. sends his money to Britain, and pays the King's just duties.
B. sends his money to the neighboring nations, and pays no duties, whereby his money is sunk with regard to Britain and A—a both.
A. and B. are neighbors, and deal in the same commodities.
C. inquires the price of an article of A. He answers 5 £. is the lowest. Applies to B. He asks him 4 J. for the same in quantity and quality; consequently C. purchases of B. and leaves honest A. to starve. Where is the justice of this? Why is your pen dip'd in gaul? Where is your golden rule? Are these things right? Is it not then of absolute necessity that Government should interpose to right themselves and the Fair Trader? And what more effectual method than by appointing the Board of Commissioners, and sending cruizers on the coast to intercept these Smugglers, enemies both to King and subjects. I expect you will fly in a passion at my thus stating this affair; but look over it again, and weigh it well. Don't view it and start back as [...], in Magnalian days, did their horrid [...], and run away affrighted without examining the object. Examine it well, you'll [...] it flesh and bones, no metaphysical chimera, but as conclusive as a mathematical demonstration.
[Page 19]How much greater burthens do the Britons bear than the A.....ans? They pay a tax on every article they eat, drink, or wear, and even for the light of the sun; but the A—ans only for what they voluntarily chuse with regard to Britain. How does the honest Farmer laugh in his sleeve to hear your complaints, who wears no cloathing, nor eats or drinks any thing but his own produce. Leave your luxury and carry on an an equitable trade, your complaints will soon cease.
With regard to Mr. White's observation, they say it is undoubtedly true that wisdom travels west, and the reason they assign is your travelling east. Mr. White, your Predecessors, and other worthies of a prophetical turn always predicted future events, looking forward for the recompence of their virtue, but you, like Lot's wife, or the Israelites after deliverance from Egypt, look back as loth to proceed, dreading the consequence; and well you may, they say. They would have had me added a few strictures on the Seventh Commandment, and the LORD's Prayer; but as to the latter, as you say it is not becoming Christians to use, I chuse to decline.
A few REMARKS on your supposed motives will finish.
By the above absurd, base misconstructions, false logic, &c. we find what a virtuoso of an age we live in. How triumphant are the sons of calumny and defamation! How violent are the influences of prejudice! I have had the satisfaction of some small acquaintance with you, and could fully have vouch'd [Page 20] for your honor and honesty, and am well satisfied of your swearing to your hurt and changing not, which the Psalmist gives as a characteristic of a citizen of Zion, where nothing enters that makes a lye, which is one reason of my adopting your cause. The ingenious Anagram on your Father, by the pious Author of his life, Tu Homo Ter Sanctus, would be improper to ascribe to you while living.
As to your first motive, they alledge you have catch'd an itch at writing.
Can any wonder at your frequent writing, when your genius is peculiar, cash runs low, "Providence calls to stir up your gift," your subjects always new and alarming, Printers ready to give any price for your copies, whether your assertions are prov'd or not it matters not a groat, if your ends are answer'd.
As to your seeking a Diploma; I expected your Dissertations on JEHOVAH and the LORD's Prayer, &c. which you sent to Scotland would have produc'd it, but I suppose they judg'd them not so weighty as Cash: However, hope you are not discouraged, for I'll warrant you a D. D. (of which you are highly deservant) very soon; although you find your North-British Brethren so insensible of your incomparable abilities, as a new manufacture of Diploma-making is lately established in America. Surely, Reverend Sir, you cannot fail of a homespun one, as you have shone with such distinguish'd lustre among some other Worthies of the Cloth, in the defence of American Liberty.
[Page 21]As to their imagination of your having a huge fancy for the Presidentship; the insinuation is an affront to your natural modesty: But however the Electors can inform any who enquire, whether you did'nt give some hint tending thereto: But suppose you had, they'd find few better qualify'd; your inimitable seraphic display of your forefinger in your zealous enforcing your injunctions would yield a sublime lustre to that august University: Omitting private conversation on that subject, I can't pass taking notice of the indignity reflected, when instead thereof you were offer'd the Praeceptorship of the North Latin-school.
As to your view of a Boon; no doubt but your unwearied pains and sweat in collecting and twisting from ancient authors (tho' fabulous, they say) your several arguments, and stating the unhappy situation of A—a, with your seasonable and necessary hints are highly deservant of an adequate reward; and though some men would not take the trouble of reading them over for twice the money you have got for e'm, and may call it an harangue, 'tis most certain he who wins has the best right to laugh.
As to a certain, GOOD MAN you mean to injure, if it's the Person I imagine you mean, common gratitude must remove so base an insinuation, or you must have publicly recommended that virtue contrary to your practice, which is inconsistent with common honesty; however, herein leave you to answer for yourself.
As to being a Popish Incendiary; its true [Page 22] I have known of a long correspondence you have had at Canada, but the letters you receiv'd were wrote in French, and tho' I have seen some of them, I cannot ascertain their contents, but never imagined there was any such design on so honest a man as I conceiv'd you to be, but rather inclin'd to think those lines applicable to you:
As to your being influenced by the Daughters of Liberty; the wise man tacks women and wine together as equally to be avoided, and I have always look't on't for a person guilty of an attrocious crime to endeavour to extenuate it by pleading his being under the influence of a Daughter of Eve, (there being no general rule without exception) equally culpable as for another in a similar case to plead being in his cups, for they are continually at our elbows, by smiles, gesture, dress, &c. endeavoring to ensnare us, and how few have escap'd them, especially in youth: But imagine you must have been too knowing to have been taken in at this time of day. And as to what they call dire flogging, your Ecclesiastical Judges might have been as partial as the former Judges of your country when they hung a poor bedrid Weaver to save a better man. As to their observations on your arguments, they are evidently insufficient to evade the force of your's, and therefore [Page 23] can admit of no reply. It rests with you Sir, Gallio like to act yourself, a man of fortitude and courage beyond the reach or notice of such envious tatlers, having performed the task assign'd yourself to the approbation of your own mind and receiv'd a handsome gratuity from the High Sons, notwithstanding the fleers of the vulgar and —approbation of the more knowing you may appropriate those lines;
POSTSCRIPT. Should you publish this Letter with a view of indulging your friends or for the sake of Cash, must enjoin your secrecy as Author.
SECOND LETTER
Assigns the reasons of the Author's writing for others, as proceeding not from his differing in political principles, but to prevent too great confidence even in the best assurances of friendship, &c. gives account of a personal dispute with the DOCTOR, treats of the nature and tendency of ingratitude.