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THE PAXTON BOYS, A FARCE.

Translated from the Original French,

BY a Native of DONEGALL.

Printed in the Year, MDCCLXIV.

[Page 2]

SCENE Opens.

The Inhabitants alarm'd for several Days past. 12 o'Clock at Night.

(Enter Express.)

THUMP, thump, thump, yoho, rouze, rouze, get up to Arms, to Arms.

Citizen.

Who's there, what noise is that, what do you want?

Expr.

Get up, up, up to Arms, where does the G—r live.

Citiz.

What's the Matter! Friend, stop, stop, alittle. 'ill shew you what's the Matter, what's the Matter.

Exp.

I must see the G—r, I cannot stav.

Citiz.

Stop, stop, I pray you what means this, I'm coming, I'll shew you what's the Matter, I'll go with you, stop, stop.

SCENE. II.

Rap, rap, at the G—r's Door (gets admittance.)

Exp.

Call the G—r.

Servant.

He's coming Sir.

Gov.

What's your business Friend.

Exp.

Sir the Paxtons are coming.

Gov.

Where are they.

Exp.

About Eighteen Miles of Sir.

Gov.

How do you know.

Exp.

I saw them Sir.

Gov.

When did you see them.

Exp.
[Page 3]

About three hours ago Sir.

Gov.

What Road are they coming.

Exp.

The Germantown Road Sir.

Gov.

How many are they.

Exp.

As near as I could guess about 1500 Sir.

Gov.

Servants, Go alarm the City, ring the Bells, alarm the Watch, alarm the Constables.

Serv.

Yes Sir.

Gov.

Knock at the Inhabitants Doors and desire them to repair to the Court-House.

Serv.

Yes Sir,

(Exit Express and Servants)
Watchman.

Thump, thump, Rap, rap, rap, ket up▪ ket up.

Citizens.

What's the Matter.

Watch.

I ton't no.

Citiz.

Is there Fire, where is it, where is it.

Watchm.

No, no, tish no Fire, the G—r sais you must ket up top of the Court-Howshe.

Thump Thump Thump along,
(Exit Watchmen.)
The Cause invites in Crouds we fly,
To join the Noisy routfull cry;
What Joys from Cares and Plagues all Day,
To hye to the Court-House, hark away:
The Brisk, the Bold, the Young, the Gay,
All hye to the Court-House, hark away.
The brisk, the bold, &c.

SCENE III.

The Citizens all in Arms, the Company's [Page 4] form'd, the Artillery ready, every Thing in order, waiting impatiently for their coming.

(Enter the second Express.)
Gov.

What news Friend.

Exp.

Sir they are within twelve Miles.

Gov.

Officers.

Offic.

Sir.

Gov.

Order your Men to Load.

Offic.

Yes Sir.

Gov.

Cap.—n March your Company and join the Barracks.

Capt.

Yes Sir.

The Barracks prepared to receive them, the Citizens impatient for Action.

(Enter First Artillery Man)
First Artill. Man.

They say they are a Par­cel of ragged Arse tatterdemalion Fellows.

W.—e.

Your mistaken, they are stout Fel­lows.

Second Artillery Man.

Are they, and do they really intend to come forward.

W.—e.

Yes indeed do they.

First Artill. Man.

Well we are ready for them, come when they will.

2d. Artill.

We'll give them a dose I'll war­rant you.

1st. Artill.

By heavens will we.

W.—e.

You'll find yourselves mistaken.

2d. Artill.

May be so.

W.—e.

Five and twenty of them supp'd at my House, and tarry'd with me all Night on [Page 5] there way hitherward.

1st. Artill.

More shame for you to enter­tain such Guests.

W.—e.

I think not so, they had business with me.

1st. Artill.

I suppose so, it was Plotting business, D—le business.

W.—e.

No Matter, they are stout Fellows and as well equipt, I tell you.

1st. Artill.

Well they may be so, we are not afraid of them, who cares.

W.—e.

Why there are 1500 of them mostly Six Foot high, and scarce a Man among them, but will hit a Mark 150 yards of, to the greatest nicety.

2d. Artill.

There are many of us can do that too.

W.—e.

I'm sure 50 of them would drive you all into Delaware.

1st. Artill.

I much question that, and for your Part, you ought to be H—d, for en­couraging Rioters, you a Maker of L—s your the D—l.

W.—e.

You should have more regard to my Age, do you know sirrah who I am.

1st. Artill.

No D—n me, nor I dont care, you're an old Sc—l.

One of the Crowd.

This has been the Lan­guage of that old R—l these several Days past.

Another of the Crowd.

I heard him several Times endeavour to discourage the Citizens while on Duty.

1st. Artill.
[Page 6]

The Governor should be in­form'd of it.

2d. Artill.

'Ill go and inform him of it by G—d.

(Exit W.—e.)

SCENE IV.

The Crowd.

Here they come, Here they are all on Horse-back.

3d. Artill.

Where are they, where are they, stand clear, stand clear, make Room: Zounds make Room, where are the Thieves s'blood stand clear, lets have a Knock at them.

The Crowd.

Here they are, they are come.

3d. Artill.

By heavens I'll slash some of them, stand clear, where are the Thieves.

2d. Artill.

Point the Guns, make Room, hand the Cartridges, light the Match, load away.

The Crowd scampering away, Helter Skei­ter, one tumbling over another.

Officers.

Prime.

Soldiers.

All Prim'd.

Officers.

Rest your Firelocks, Shoulder, Present.

Soldiers.

Give us Orders to fire.

Officers.

Don't fire till the Word Gentlemen.

The Crow'd.

A false alarm, a false alarm, it's the Dutch Company of Butchers, it's the Dutch Company of Troopers, Friends, Friends, Friends, &c.

Officers.

Recover your Arms, Shoulder.

3d. Artill.

Well enough by the Lord, it's well enough by Heavens, I was ready for them, the Thieves.

[Page 7]The hurly burly, subsided, advance Troop­ers with sound of Trumpet.

(Exit Butchers.)

(Happy Butchers, you were not butcher'd.)

A Glorious Parade through the City, Night comes on, some Guard while others rest after their Fatigue.

SCENE V.

Day Light appears.
Enter
1st. Pressbyterian.

Good Morrow Brother, well what News this Morning.

2d. Press.

Is it possible you can be ignorant, or be an idle Spectator of what we and your Brethren are doing.

1st. Pres.

No Brother God forbid, I am not an idle Spectator, nor am I ignorant of the Matter, but when I ask'd you that Question, I did not know but you might inform me of something that's new, or advise with me what is further to be done, for my Part you can­not entertain any doubt but agreeable to my Forefathers Oliverian Spirit, I would freely Sacrifice my Life and Fortune for this Cause, rather than those Misecrants of the Establish'd Church of England, or those R—ls the Q—s, should continue longer at the head of Government, it vexes me to the Soul to see those heathen Enemies. openly Protected by them, against the Law of Nature, the Law of Reason, and the Law of God.

2d. Pres.

Ay so it does me Brother, but I'm [Page 8] in hopes, as we have taken no little Pains, that Things will shortly take another turn, you know when the Arm of God is with us, and our Counsels, we need not fear what Man can do unto us.

1st. Pres.

That's true Brother? Life and all for this glorious Cause.

2d. Pres.

Stop Brother do not be so openly, Zealous and loud, possibly we may be over­heard, you'll do well to consider how the Case stands, let us go Circumspectly to Work.

1st. Pres.

How the Case stands; I have it, so much at Heart, I dont care who hears me, this is my Sentiments and I'll dye by it.

2d. P.

Would to God all our Brethren were such Godly Zealous Men as you are, then I am sure, we should carry the Point, but never fear, what we can't do by force, we must do by Policy, and you know Olivers Schemes took Effect; more through Policy and Cunning than Force, we must keep on our Guard, or we shall be in the sudds.

1st. P.

You say right, do you continue to Plan and we will execute, it seems to me Pro­vidence will favour us by furnishing us, with such wise Counsellors as you? Now we are Happy? Now we go on Triumphantly, let us Extipate those People, Root and Branch, and not leave one Soul alive, than will be fulfill'd (what the Scripture saith) we shall be all of one Mind, happy then shall we be, Thrice happy, Thrice:

2d. P.
[Page 9]

Hold I pray you, be silent, let not thy too Untimely Zeal, carry thee such lengths now, be cautious, we have Plann'd Matters well, I think they cannot fail.

1st. P.

Well! Brother I'll take thy Advice? God grant us success.

2. P.

We have been long and privately contri­ving this Matter, a few hours will decide it, 'tis humanly impossible it can prove Abortive.

1st. P.

Those Words inspire me with fresh Vigour an i Zeal? Rejoice my Soul? Cour­age? Courage.

2d. P.

Pray, pray, pray, consider 'tis Time enough for those Pious ejaculations, I see thy Spirit is enliven'd, but consider, have Pa­tience awhile.

1st. P.

Well I will endeavour so to do, but 'tis almost impossible, 'tis a hard Task, assist me ye Powers to stifle my Zeal, afew Mo­ments longer, I will.

2d. P.

Therein you'll do well.

1st. P.

I had almost forgot to tell you that I understood Yesterday our Brethren at Ger­montown was a little dishearten'd, I took the Opportunity to Ride up there, I distributed a Quantity of Powder and Balls, amongst them, and not a small Sum of Money out of my own Pocket, to enable them to bear their Expences, I told them they might depend on Assistance from their Brethren in Philadelphia if necessary, and deliver'd them several Letters from our [Page 10] Friends here: It gave them new life, they were all Unaminous in coming down, I rejoyc'd to hear it? Oh 'twas a blessed meeting I promis'd them they should be farther supply'd with Cash to carry Things on successfully; and after spending the best Part of this Morning in Prayer with them, I took a friendly leave of them for a while, so Brother; you see I have not been idle, and hope I have been of some Service to the Cause.

2d. P.

How worthy art thou among Saints, thou art good; thy Charity will be r [...]warded Four-fold.

1st. P.

This is not all Brother, I have been collecting from our Brethren here, and have met with extraordinary success. I have got already in Cash Two Thousand Pounds, and Subscriptions to near One thousand Pounds more, some were so free to give, they open'd their Baggs, and let me take out what I pleas'd.

2d. P.

O glorious? What a Spirit is here! Thou wilt be rewarded twenty Fold.

1st. P.

A Godly Spirit? Oh! that it may continue, ours is the Cause, the Cause of Glo­ry, the Cause of Religion, a Righteous Cause, the Cause of:

2d. P.

Hold, hold, here's somebody coming.

1st. P.

Not a word more, I'm done I'm silent.

SCENE VI.

(Enter Quaker)
Quaker.

Well Friends, how dost do this Morning, what News, methinks you seem [Page 11] bewilder'd, your Countenance betrays some [...]ear at those Vagabonds coming down.

1st. P.

Fear, what do you mean by fear, possibly you may have most Reason to fear [...]hortly.

2d. P.
(aside)

you'll certainly spoil all.

Quaker.

Thou seemest angry, I don't un­derstand thee a right Friend, explain thyself, why I should be more afraid hereafter than thee.

1st. P.

I don't choose it at Present: Stay till the Time comes.

Qua.

What Time, thou talkest Misterious? What Time, I cannot divine thy meaning, thou talkest in unintelligible dark Characters.

1st. P.

You may think as you will, I will satisfy you no further now.

Qua.

Thou seemest to be possess'd of a Spi­rit of Madness, I can scarce have Patience with thee.

1st. P.

I am not so mad as you, you seem to have the Spirit of the D—l in you.

2d. P.

Sir excuse my Friend, he is a little out of humour this Morning, he was disturb'd of his Rest last Night.

Qua.

Ay, ay, I suppose he was at German­town last Night, giving them Vagrants Coun­sel, was he not.

1st. P.

No Matter it's none of your business.

Qua.

It is Matter, I shall take notice of thee.

1st. P.

Ay, and so shall I of you.

Qua.
—Was I in Power I'd let thee know,
[Page 12]Thou shouldst not dare to babble so;
I think thou dost deserve the Gallows,
As much or more than those Paxton fellows.
1st. P.

'Tis more likely you'll get there first.

Qua.

Ay if thou hadst thy will.

1st. P.

Nothing more certain.

Qua.

'Tis plain from thy Discourse that thou and thine Intends to pour out thy Vials of Wrath and D—sh—ss on the Inhabitants of this City, and those Innocents they have taken into their Protection, thou and thy Friends are one of the seven Plagues, thou hast the Mark of the Beast.

1st. P.

Oh had they but one Neck (as a worthy Roman said) that I might lop them off at one chop.

Qua.

O! wretched Barbarity.

1st. P.
Bless'd shall that Man be call'd,
That takes thy Children young;
To dash their Bones against the Stones▪
That lye in the Streets among.
Qua.

My Soul shudders at the Thought.

1st. P.

Begone.

Qua.
Is that the Language of thy Heart,
O wicked, wicked wretch thou art.
1st. P.

Away! Away.

Qua.

Oh! Lancaster, Lancaster, the blood of murder'd Innocents cry out for Vengeance? Oh! Presbyterians, Presbyterians, who shall deliver thee from the Wrath to come.

1st. P.

Away, Away, with all such pusilanimous Fellows.

Qua.
[Page 13]

Shocking, shocking, I can hear no more.

SCENE VII.

(Enter Churchman.)
Qua.

Friend how dost thou do, give me thy Hand.

Chur.

Sir, I am glad to see you, how do you do, are you not well, you look a little discompos'd.

Qua.

Ay well I may—no wonder, I have been much flustrated, I have been Ill treated by my Neighbour P—I never took him to be the Man I now find he is.

Chur.

Why Sir, I hope he has not treated you ill.

Qua.

Worse than I ever was treated, by any one I'm sure, worse than ever I was treated in my life.

Chur.

I am very sorry for it indeed, perhaps he was only joking.

Qua.

No no, it was a true joke.

Chur.

Is it possible that he was in Earnest.

Qua.

Yes we were both in Earnest.

Chur.

Upon what Account pray.

Qua.

Upon the present Disturbances.

Chur.

Surely does he take their Parts.

Qua.

Yes and very Violently.

Chur.

You surprize me.

Qua.

He does openly and avowedly, and is so brazen in it I could scarce keep my Hands off of him.

Chur.

You astonish me, but 'tis best as it is.

Qua.

He has gone so far in it and spoke so much in their favour, that I think it, is little better than Treason▪ I am sure the Law could take hold of him for it; and I think I shall not be satisfy'd untill I have made a proper Report of the Matter, when these present Disturbances are a little settled.

Chur.

I make no doubt but he is to blame, pass [Page 14] it over now and take another Opportunity to call him before his betters, I dare say he will receive but little Countenance, our M—s are all good Subjects, hearty in the Cause of Liberty and sup­porting the Constitutions, and doubt not but, they will make Publick examples of any that dare op­pose them.

Qua.

'Tis a Mercy they are so, or I am sure we should be put in a deplorable Situation, but we ought to be Thankful.

Chur.

Here is a fine Sight to see these Troops, I think they make a handsome Appearance.

Qua.

So they do Friend, it rejoices my Heart to see those Drums and Colours display'd, and such Numbers of Men met arm'd together, for the sup­port of Government, and to prevent Inhuman Masacre.

1st. P.

You may change your note before to Morrow-Morning.

Qua.

I doubt thy Words, but how comes it to pass, there are so few of thy Sect among them, from what thou hast already said, 'tis plain the Coun­tenances Rioters, and possibly when they come will join them.

1st. P.

With all my Soul.

Qua.

I thought so, thou goest about to destroy the best of Kings, and the best of Governments.

1st. P.

How will you prove that.

Qua.

By thy Words and Actions.

1st. P.

You talk like a Fool.

Qua.

Thee talks and acts like one, in not agree­ing with me and all good Men, that we are Govern'd by the best of Kings, and how dare thee say to the contrary, thou Disenter.

1st. P.

And so are [...]er, and how dare [Page 15] you find fault with me for being the same with your­self in that Particular.

Qua.

But my Disenting does not proceed from any dislike to the King, or the Government, but from a Religious scruple of Conscience in bearing Arms, but thou art a Desenter from the wickedness of thy heart, like the fallen Angels, and let me tell thee, that unless thou mends thy ways, thy Con­dition may be like unto theirs.

1st. P.

Do you say we are govern'd by the best of Kings.

Qua.

Yes verily I do.

1st. P.

And why then do not you take up Arms to support that King and his Government.

Qua.

I have never done it yet against the com­mon Enemy, but when there is a real necessity as there appears to be now, thou shalt be convinc'd that I will carry Arms and fight too; and chastize such Wretches as thou art with thy bloody perse­cuting Principles, who art not worthy to live in a free Government: Then will I remember New-England and make thee tremble.

(Churchman.)
2d. Churchman.

They are come, they are come.

1st. P.

God be thanked.

Qua.

Than 'tis Time to Arm, and do thou attack me if thou dares, and thou shalt find that I have Courage and Strength sufficient, to trample thee under my Feet

Stir then good People be not still nor quiet,
Rouze up yourselves take Arms and quell the Riot;
Such Wild-fire Chaps may, dangerous Mischeifs raise.
And [...]er unthinking People in a blaze.
[Page 16]

P. S. Should they Attempt, or be mad enough to come down again, it's probable I may change the FARCE into a TRAGEY-COMEDY.

FINIS.

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