Sacramental exercises or, The Christian's employment, before, at, and after the Lords Supper. By Jabez Earle.

Sacramental exercises or, The Christian's employment, before, at, and after the Lords Supper. By Jabez Earle.

Table of contents

Title page

TO THE READER

Sacramental EXERCISES.

CHAP. I. The Christian convinc'd, that its his Duty to come, to the Lord's-Table.

CHAP. II. The Christian resolv'd to offer Himself to the Communion.

CHAP. III. After having been approv'd by the Minister, and allow'd to Communicate.

CHAP. IV. The Christian preparing for the Lord's Supper.

SECT. I.

SECT. II.

SECT. III.

SECT. IV.

SECT. V.

SECT. VI.

SECT. VII.

SECT. VIII.

CECT. IX.

SECT. X.

CHAP. V. The Christian at the Lord's Table.

SECT. I.

SECT. II. While the Minister is breaking the Bread.

SECT. III. While the Minister is pouring out of the Wine.

SECT. IV. Taking the Bread, &c.

SECT. V. Taking the Cup, &c.

SECT. VI. At the Conclusion of the Ordinance,

CHAP. VI. The Christian in his Retirements, after the Lords Supper.

SECT. I, When the Ordinance has been comfortable.

SECT. II. When the Ordinance has not answer'd Expectation.

〈…〉 by D. Henchman in King-Street, Boston.

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Sacramental EXERCISES OR, THE Christian's Employment, Before, At, and After THE Lords Supper.

BY JABEZ EARLE.

BOSTON: Re-printed by T. Fleet. for Daniel Henchman, in King-Street, 1715.

TO THE READER

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IT is sad to consider how many Professed Christians live in the Utter Neglect of the Lord's Supper, and how few Communicants are careful to Prepare duly, Eat and Drink worthily, and Live answerably.

A great deal has been written upon this Occasion, to which I have added the following Sheets, which I may be allow'd, I hope, to Publish, without being thought to pretend to any thing Extraordinary, or detract from the Excellent Performances of others.

For while the Case requires and admits Help, there can be no Harm in making [Page]further Trials; especially in those Circumstances where the most likely Means are not ever the most Effectual: But Success more especially depends upon the Divine Blessing, which is not always given in Regular Proportion to the Natural Aptitude of the Means, but sometimes in a sovereign and unaccountable Manner; That no Flesh should Glory in his Presence.

However, it is too plain to be deny'd, That the different Capacities and Relishes of Men make a Variety useful, if not necessary; and that there may be a Concurrence of many other Circumstances which shall give a meaner Performance, the Advantage with some People, as to Usefulness, above others that are more Spritely and Elaborate. Nay, it is no impossible Thing, that a man may read a Book upon some fore in Consideration, which shall be blessed to do Him that good which could never be expected from better Discourses not known of, or not minded.

[Page] Upon these Accounts I have Publish'd the ensuing Papers, hoping they may be useful to some, whatever their General Entertainment be.

I will not detain you any longer than while I desire you to joyn your Prayers with mine in recommending these Endeavours to the Blessing of Him who alone can give the desired Increase.

J. E.

Dec. 22. 1707.

Sacramental EXERCISES.

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CHAP. I. The Christian convinc'd, that its his Duty to come, to the Lord's-Table.

DO [...] Remembrance of Me. 1 Cor. 11.25. It is the voice of my LORD; and least I should think it was directed only to his Twelve Disciples, or the Christians of the First Ages, St. Paul assures me, that this Ordinance is to run Parallel with Time, and by it the Church is to shew forth Christ's Death' till he come. Consider, O my Soul! Is the Lord at hand? [Page]Will he surely come quickly? How shall I answer it in that Day, that I have neglected so express a Command? A Command not couch'd in Ambiguous and Uncertain Terms, but deliver'd in as Plain and Positive Expressions as any in the Bible. Sure I am more Brutish than any Man, and have not the Understanding of a Man! I have profess'd a mighty Respect to the Authority of my Redeemer, and a vast Reverence for his Laws, but how unaccountably have I manag'd! As tho' I were to chuse what Commands I would please to obey, and were vested with a dispensing Power, superior to the Obligation of his Precepts, to whom all Power is given both in Heaven and in Earth. Mat. 28.18.

Blush, O my Soul, and be asham'd at so inconsistent a Conduct! Either Christ is thy Prince and Lawgiver, or He is not. If not, profess [...] self an Infidel, and renounce thy Baptism. If He be, obey him in all that he requires, and [Page]either believe, that he has not made it thy Duty to Remember Him, or yield a Chearful Subjection in this, as well as other Instances.

When He has said, Do this, either He does not mean what He says, or does not speak to thee; or else thy Disobedience is at once inexcusable and unaccountable.

Can the Words be wrested? Is any Sophistry capable of contesting their Sense? What can Do this, signify less than a Positive Command? Or, how can the Will of my Prince be ever signify'd, so as to oblige me, if so plain Terms are by any Cavil to be eluded?

But does He speak to me? If I were a true Disciple, I were indeed within the Compass of the Law, and must be either a Communicant or a Rebel.

Consider, O my Soul, and don't rashly dash thy Hopes, to escape thy Duty. 'Tis true, I am not such a Christian as I should be: But am I willing to have my Name missing in the Book of Life? [Page]Can I be content to resign my Birthright, and own that I have neither Lot nor Portion in the Son of God? Would I be pass'd by, when the Lord shall count, Psal. 87.6. and write up the People? Either I am a Christian, or I am not: If I am, This Commandment is for me: If I am not, what am I? A Child of Wrath, and a Subject of the Devil? And is such a Condition tolerable? Let me give up my self to Christ immediately: Make no tarrying, O my Soul, lest the Avenger of Blood overtake thee; and lest if thou trifle to Day, thou be lost to Morrow. If I have been but almost perswaded to be a Christian hitherto, its high Time that I make an absolute, unreserved Surrender of my self to Christ presently, without any farther Delay; and then let what I have done here in Secret, be publickly own'd and avouch'd at the Lord's Table.

And now, Lord, All my Desire is before the: I am convinc'd of rimy [Page]Duty, and dare no longer disobey. Oh forgive me, that I have rebell'd so long! I have been invited to thy Table, and foolishly neglected many an Opportunity of strengthening and refreshing my Soul. I have been commanded to attend in Remembrance of Him who deserves never to be forgotten, and by my Neglect have at once pour'd Contempt upon thy Authority, and flighted his Love who loved me, and gave Himself for me.

I bless thee, that I am in some Measure sensible of my Error, and am come to a Resolution, that I will have Respect to this, as well as other Commands. The Time past shall suffice me to have lived in the Omission of so plain a Duty, and the Neglect of so glorious a Privilege. Oh! keep it upon the Imagination of my Heart for ever, and let me be confirm'd in those good Purposes, which thy own Spirit has led me to form, and no less Power than His can help me to keep!

[Page] I am indeed unworthy, but acknowledge the Insufficiency of that Plea, against a Positive Command. I am unworthy, but must not therefore refuse thy Kindness. I hope I am in Christ, tho' the meanest Soul that relates to Him, and therefore cannot any longer want an Ordinance; in the Use of which, I hope to grow in Grace, and in the Knowledge of my Lord.

Or, if I have hitherto deceiv'd my self and walk'd in a vain shew, I now desire to accept the Gospel-Offer, to own my Baptismal Covenant, to avouch Thee, O Father, Son and Spirit, to be my God, my All, my Everlasting Portion. Upon my bended Knees I now accept an Offer'd Saviour, and call Heaven and Earth to witness, that as far as I can Judge, I am sincere. And this I would declare in the Presence of thy People, begging with some Hope and Confidence, that I may be accepted now, and found in the Number of the Faithful at last. [Page]O direct me in all the steps I am to take; and let me see my Way, and follow it, and have Comfort in the Issue, thro' the Merits and Mediation of my Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ. Amen,

CHAP. II. The Christian resolv'd to offer Himself to the Communion.

NOW, O my Soul, thou hast opened thy Mouth to the Lord, and canst not go back! Thy next Duty is to apply thy self to the Minister, who is the Steward of these Mysteries, 1 Cor. 4.1. that if he judge thee meet, he may admit thee to the Holy Solemnity. Let me not be foolishly bashful, much less act the Hypocrite; but use the utmost Frankness with my Spiritual Guide: That he may be able to [Page]pass the better Judgment upon my Case, let me state it fairly; neither pretend to what I have not receiv'd, nor deny what I have. This would be Base Ingratitude; That Impious Monkery. Freely open thy Breast, and un [...]osom thy Soul: Tell him thy [...]sires, and their Motives; Confess thy Fears, Doubts and Jealousies, beg his Prayers, and reverence his Judgment. If he should think thee unfit, ben't provok'd nor discou [...]g'd, but take his Counsel, and wait with Pa [...]ience, 'till he. Judge thee sufficiently instructed, and duly qualify'd. If [...] press his Satisfaction, don't dist [...]st him, but believe him a more capable Judge of thy Case than thou art thy se [...] Not that thou shouldst esteem him infa [...] lible; It's his Master's Province to search Hearts: But sure his Judgment deserves the same Regard as a Physician's about thy Body, or a Lawyer's concerning thy Estate. Be faithful in the Account of thy self, and doubt not but he'll be faithful in delivering his Opinion. And with his Faithfulness thou mayst expect Tenderness, [Page]Condescension and Compassion, in Imitation of the Chief Shepherd who is meek and lowly in Heart, who will not quench the smoaking Flax, Mat. 11.29. nor break the bruised Reed.

Oh! that God who has convinc'd me of my Duty, and brought me to a Resolution, would help me to be open and sincere. Let me not go about to impose upon thy Minister; which would be justly interpreted as an Attempt to impose upon my Lord himself, whose Eyes are as a Flame of Fire; who can't be deceived, as knowing what is in Man; and will not be mock'd, as being a Jealous [...]. O give me Freedom, that I may utter what I have felt. Give me Humility, that I mayn't be ashamed to discover those Follies and Imperfections that may be at the Bottom of my Doubts and Scruples. Give me a teachable Disposition, that I may not despise Instruction. Help me to remember the Relation, in which [Page]these Under-Shepherds stand to the Great Shepherd and Bishop of Souls, 1 Pet. 2.25.

Let me not despise his Judgment of my Case, nor yet lay too great a Stress upon it, remembring that Ministers may accept where God may reject, and admit those to the Sacrament, as qualify'd for Communion with the Church, who yet shall be found unworthy Receivers, as not having a Wedding-Garment.

Oh direct thy Servant, that he may deal prudently and tenderly, and yet withal, faithfully. Let him be duly appriz'd of my Case, and pass such a Verdict as the great Judge will ratify.

CHAP. III. After having been approv'd by the Minister, and allow'd to Communicate.

BE thankful, O my Soul, that God has heard the Voice of thy Supplication! [Page]His Minister has dealt tenderly and faithfully with thee, has encourag'd thy Design, promis'd the Assistance of his Prayers, given thee Instruction, and suitable Advice, and nothing more remains, but thy Actual Preparation for that Holy Ordinance.

But, O see to it, that thy Heart be right. 'Tis a deceitful Heart thou hast to manage: Look to thy self, that thy Goodness be not as the Morning Cloud and early Dew, that soon passeth away. Remember the Warning the Minister gave thee, that thou shouldst not act in such a Case without serious Thought, and mature Deliberation; lest rash Engagements should issue in broken Vows, and cursed Apostacy.

Take heed, O my Soul, that I ben' [...] another Instance to confirm the Truth of that Awful Observation, of which he told me weeping, That many Hot Professors have dwindled into Luke-warm Christians, and sometimes fell headlong into the Gulf of Profaneness and Infidelity [Page]Tremble to think if this should be thy sad Case, and let thy Fear quicken thy Application, that thou mayst not end in the Flesh, after having begun in the Spirit.

Yet let me not be discourag'd. 'Tis indeed a great Thing to be a Christian; but great is thè Grace and Mercy of God, Great is the Merit, and Prevalent the Intercession of my Redeemer, who has pray'd for his Disciples, that their Faith fail not. Luke 22.32. Great is the power of the Holy Ghost, who can preserve my Graces, to subdue my Corruptions, help me to Crucify the World, and resist and vanquish the Devil. Never forget the Encouragement he gave me to hope, that if my Heart don't reproach me, as acting deceitfully in my Professions and Engagements; and if I will keep close to God in the Way of his Appointments, I need not fear being decepted of him now, and having the good Work begun, carry'd on to the Day of Jesus.

[Page] But. O my Soul, see to it; and again, I say, see to it, that thou do with full Purpose of Heart cleave to the Lord. That thy present Devotion don't prove a sudden Flash; but having set thy Hand to the Plough, don't think of looking back. Remember that awful Text, It had been better for them not to have known the way of Righteousness, 2 Pet. 2.21. than after they have known it, to turn from the Holy Commandment. Let this Word be a Spur to thy Diligence; but not revive thy Scruples. It were better never to communicate, than afterwards to Apostatize.

But will this be a Plea for thy Disobedience? Consider, O my Soul, at this Rate, thou shouldst never have been Baptiz'd, never call'd thy self a Christian, never joyn'd thy self to a worshipping Assembly, never heard a Semon, or put up a Prayer, never given an Al [...], or perform'd a Duty of any Sort; seeing all these will aggravate thy Misery, if thou prove a Hypocrite, or Apostate, at last.

[Page] Therefore in the Strength of Christ, hold on thy Way: Don't decline thy Lord's Table, but prepare for it; that being a worthy Communicant here, thou mayst at last be a Partaker of the Inheritance of the Saints in Ligh.

Attempt all this in a better Strength than thy own; ever remembring, that of thy self thou canst do nothing, and that, God's Grace is at once necessary and sufficient for thee.

Now O my God, I adore and praise Thee, that I have been enabled to open my Case to thy Minister; and that thou hast inclin'd his Heart kindly' to encourage me, wifely to instruct' me, and faithfully to warn me. O may thy good Spirit make his Endeavours' effectual, that I may receive Instruction and take Warning. I am sensible of the Treachery and Baseness of my own Heart; but I am also acquainted with thy Power, and Mercy, and Faithfulness: Oh let me not rashly take up a Profession which I shall as hastily [...]andon, or never live up to.

[Page] Help me to understand the Engagements I am going under, that I may count the Cost, and not prove a Foolish Builder: Help me to Consider the Difficulties and Disadvantages that attend Religion, and the Troubles it may expose me to. May I seriously consider, that I must deny my self, and take up my Cross, and follow Christ, if I would be his Disciple.

Yet let none of these Things move me from my Resolution. O give me such near and affecting Views of the Glory that is to be reveal'd, and of that Wrath and fiery Indignation which awaits the Ungodly: So set Death and Judgment before me, to impress me with a Sense of the Worth of my Soul, and the Emptiness of this World; that I may be fully determined to accept a Christ, and adhere to him with all his Disadvantages; that I my count all things but Loss, for the Excellency of the Knowledge of Him. Phil. 3.8. And O may this be my unalterable [Page]unalterable Perswasion. Let me never turn aside, nor go a Whoring from Thee. Oh let me not wander from thy Commandments! Let me never, like an ungracious Prodigal, forsake my Father's House, or count his Meat contemptible. O never let me deny or forget that Jesus, whom I am so solemnly to remember and avouch for my Lord and my God. Let the unclean Devil never re-enter, and take Possession of this Soul, which I Consecrate as a Temple, to the Holy Ghost. I am full of Fears, and have Reason to be jealous of my self; but yet I am not void of Hope; nor have any Reason to distrust my God. Thy Grace is sufficient for me. O for thy Names sake, lead me and guide me: Put thy Fear into my Heart, that I may never depart from Thee.

And O let not the Deceitfulness of my own Heart, the Incumbrances of the World, or the Sollicitations of the Devil, put me by the Design I have [Page]form'd of attending at thy Table; May a Sense of Duty outweigh a Thousand Excuses; and Hopes of Gracious Assistance, and merciful Acceptance, silence all my Fears.

Yet let me not come unworthily: May I never eat and drink Judgment to my self. Deliver me from the dreadful Guilt of Crucifying afresh and putting to open Shame, Him whom I think my Soul loves, and I desire to rememben, avouch and honour. Keep me from the great Unhappiness of being poison'd by the Richest Food, and Highest Cordial; of coming for a Blessing, and carrying away a Curse. Amen, for Jesus Sake.

CHAP. IV. The Christian preparing for the Lord's Supper.

SECT. I.

COnsider, O my Soul, the Day is near, in which I am to appear at [Page]the Table of my Lord! It concerns me to prepare, that I may be a welcome Guest, and a worthy Receiver. To prepare!. Tho' the Expression be short, its comprehensive; and I shall find it implies more Work than can be crouded into a little Time, or done with a little Pains. Let me therefore redeem some Time from my Business, at least from my Pleasures, before the Week be far advanc'd; that unforeseen Occurrences may'nt deprive me of an Opportunity to dress my Soul for the Glorious Solemnity, and put me upon the unhapy Plunge of missing the Feast, or wanting the Wedding-Garment.

And, O my Soul, exert thy self, let all thy Powers be upon the Stretch. What thou findest to do, do it with all thy Might, that thou mayst not ridiculously trifle away that Time, which thou seemest conscientiously to redeem.

See to it, that in thy Retirements thou be really alone; that the World don't follow thee into thy Closet; or thy [Page]Thoughts fly abroad into the World, and leave a Heartless Carcase to entertain thy God. If thy Mind ben't fix'd upon the Work before thee, thy Retirements will be but solemn Idleness: Or if the World be admitted to put thee by thy Duty, the Closet will be but a more private Compting House.

SECT. II.

LET me now, O my Soul, prepare for my Preparations. Let me lay down the Plan of my Design, that I may not be at a Loss how to manage, but may go regularly on without that Confusion of Thought which will lessen the Pleasure and Profit of my Work.

There appears to be several Branches of that Business, which is called by the General Name of Preparation. But before I enter upon Particulars, I would first be deeply possessed of the Necessity [Page]of the Duty in General; which will quicken me to the greater Care and Seriousness in a Business that so well deserves it.

To this End consider closely, that an unprepar'd Communicant must necess [...] rily be an unworthy one. And the Danger of eating and drinking unworthily is represented by St. Paul in very Awful Terms; such a one eats and drinks Damnation to himself!

Damnation! Tremble, O my Soul, at the Dismal Thought. Sure it should strike a Chilness into my Blood, and [...] Horror into my Spirit! Can any Tongue express, can any Mind conceive the direful Contents of that Expression? However Interpreters may soften it, the Thro [...]tning can never be disarm'd: The Thunder of it must needs put a tender Spirit into Convulsions and Agonies, at least affect him to a very high Degree.

To eat and drink Judgment to ones fel [...] can signify no less than falling under the Displeasure of the Living God. And [Page]who knows what it is to be the Object of his angry Resentments, in whose Favour is Life, and whose Wrath is worse than Death? If I eat and drink unworthily, the least I can expect is Temporal Strokes; I am in Danger of Spiritual ones, & deserve Eternal Vengeance. Indeed there is Forgiveness with God; but shall I sin because Grace abounds? At that Rate, I may venture In Defiance of that Word, Whoremongers and Adulterers God will Judge, &c. or commit the worst of Villanies, because God is good, and plen [...]us in Mercy.

Nor yet shall this Thought deter me from my Duty; for upon the same Principle I must abstain from Hearing, because that will aggravate my Condemnation if I am found disobedient. The Prayer of the wicked is an Abomination: Yea, the Plougbing of the Wicked is Sin; and shall I therefore forsake the Publick Worship of God, or neglect the Business of my particular Calling?

[Page] But, O my Soul, let this Thought affect thee, so as to quicken thy Endeavours, that thou mayst be admitted to the Lord's Table, as a worthy Receiver, and return rejoycing in the God of thy Salvation. Let the Hopes of this put Life into thy Attempts. Think and think a gain, how vast will be the Advantage of worthy Receiving. What Words can express the Blessed Consequences of a Regular Attendance at the Lord's Table?

I may expect to have my Faith strengthned by the Representation of my Lord's Sufferings; I may hope to have my Love to him enflam'd by the Remembrance of his expensive Love to me; my Resolutions confirm'd, my Mind more Spiritualiz'd, and my whole Conversation made more Regular. I may meet with sweet Peace, and strong Consolation; yea, perhaps with Rapturous Joy, Joy unspeakable and full of Glory. 1 Pet. 1.8. Something that shall prove a Cordial under the future Troubles of Life, and in the Agories of Death too. [Page]I may there meet with Him whom my Soul loves, and have such Tokens of his Love as shall in the Remembrance prove a Continual Feast.

But however, if I am sincere, I shall not be wholly disappointed: My Labour shall not be in vain in the Lord. I shall get real good, if not sensible; if not present, yet certain. I shall reap what I sow, tho' it be long first. The Harvest will be sure, tho' late; and then I shall have an abundant Recompence for all the Fatigue of the Seed-Time.

Come then, O my Soul, up and be doing, spare no Pains in a Matter that deserves the utmost Diligence, and will well reward it: And that thou mayst not do this important Work negligently, lift up thy Heart to the Father of Spirits, without whose gracious Influences thou canst do nothing.

O my God, the Preparation of the Heart of Man is from thee. This I desire to be, so sensible of, as to beg with the utmost Farn [...]ness that I may be [Page]enabled to prepare my self suitably to so solemn an Ordinance.

Oh impress me with an awful Sense of the Danger of receiving unworthily! that I may not dare to trifle with Thee, the Holy and Jealous God. Make me duly to consider the inexpressible Advantage of worthy Receiving; that I may not at once sin against, Thee, and wrong my own Soul, by a negligent Behaviour. Direct me in every Step I am to take; Enlighten my Mind, Enlarge my Heart, raise my Affections, Keep off the Tempter, keep down my Corruptions; and so help me in the whole of my Duty, that I may have this Token for good, that thou designest to meet me and bless me at that Holy Solemnity! It's agreat Thing to be duly prepar'd; but Thy Grace is sufficient for me. Let thy Strength be made perfect in my Weakness, and the Praise shall be thine own.

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SECT. III.

LET a Man examine himself, and so let him eat, says the Inspir'd Apostle: Come then O my Soul, call thy self to an Account, whether thou art in any Measure that which God expects every Worthy Communicant should be.

Have I Knowledge to diseern the Lord's Body? Am I appriz'd of the Nature and End of this Ordinance? Has not the Minister bestow'd upon me Labour in vain, when he opened these Mysteries to me? Has what I have read and heard about this Matter, given me a tolerable Notion of it? I know, a Man may have Knowledge enough, and yet eat and drink unworthily; but yet without some good Measure of Understanding, he can't be an acceptable Communicant.

Do I therefore understand the Nature of the Gospel Covenant, the Covenant of Grace, of which the Sacraments are Seals?

Do I know how the first Covenant [Page]was broken, into what a sad Condition the Fall of our First Parents brought their wretched Offspring? How it pleased God in Infinite Mercy, to enter into a New Covenant, thro' a Redeemer, in which he has provided for his own Honour and our Happiness? Do I understand who is the Mediator, what the Blessings, and what the Terms of this Covenant?

Do I understand the Relation that this Sacrament bears to that Covenant? That it's instituted by the Mediator, to whom all Power is given, both [...] in Heaven and Earth, That Mat. 28.18. its design'd to represent the [...] Blessings He has purchas'd, with the Manner in which they were procur'd and are apply'd: That I am at the Lord's Table to shew forth his Death: That the broken Bread represents his Body, which was broken for us; and the Wine, his precious Blood, which was shed for us. Our eating that Bread, and drinking that Cup, signifys that Fiducial Feeding upon [Page]him, who is that (and more) to our Souls, that Broad, the Staff of Life, and Wine that chears the Heart, is to our Bodys?

Do I understand how it Seals the Covenant to every worthy Receiver? How hereby God obliges himself to be their God, to pardon their Sins, sanctify their Souls, and at last bring 'em to Eternal Happiness and Glory. How herein they engage themselves to Him, thankfully accepting what he offers, and chearfully complying with what he demands. That herein we open our Mouths to God, and swear, that we will be his, in the Bonds of an Everlasting Covenant, that shall not be forgotten; accepting him, and resigning our selves.

Do I know of what Advantage this Ordinance is to every Worthy Communicant? How it is design'd to confirm their Faith, to enflame their Love, purify their Consciences, and comfort their Souls.

Do I understand how it produces [Page]these Effects? not in a Natural Way, nor meerly in a Moral One; but by the Powerful Influences of the Spirit, dispensed, and to be expected in a Devout Attendance upon the Appointments of Infinite Wisdom and Goodness? Let me put to my own Soul that Question which my Saviour put to his Disciples, Hast thou understood all these Things?

I must confess, my apprehensions of these Things are too dark and confus'd; but I dare not deny the Grace of God, who has given me some Acquaintance with these Awful Mysteries. And I hope I do desire to improve in Knowledge, and am willing to receive Instruction.

‘And O that God would teach me what I yet know not, and lead me farther into the Knowledge of all necessary Truth! Oh that he would shew me his Covenant; Psal. 25. and help me to grow in Grace, 2 Pet. 3. and in the Knowledge of my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ! [Page]That he would reveal to me, by his Spirit, those deep Things of God,1 Cor. 2. which the Natural Man receiveth not, because they are Spiritually discern'd. O Father of Lights, Eph. 3. who givest Wisdom liberally, and upbraidest not; make me to know the Love of Christ, which passeth Knowledge; and help me to comprehend with all Saints, the Breadth, and Length, and Depth, and Height of it. Amen.’

SECT. IV.

COnsider, O my Soul, that meer Knowledg is not a sufficient Qualification for the Holy Communion. If I have Knowledg to discern the Lord's Body, and want Faith to feed upon him, I shall return from his Table disappointed and asham'd. My Blessed Lord has told me, that Except I eat his Flesh, John 6. and drink his Blood, I have no Life in me. Now this I know, must be by Faith, not after a [Page]Corporal and Carnal Manner: Let me therefore put that Question to my Soul, which my Saviour put to his Disciples; Where is thy Faith? Do I believe in an unseen Jesus? Can my Soul make her Applications to him, and derive from his Fulness, even Grace for Grace? Am I in any Measure acquainted with this Mystery? And can I understand by any Experience of my own, what the Apostle meant, when he said, I live; yet not I, Gal. 2.20. but Christ liveth in me? What should He do at a Royal Feast, that cannot taste of the Provision? Am I therefore taught of God to believe in Jesus?

‘Lord, I believe, help thou mine Unbe lief! I hope I have tasted that the Lord is gracious. I can remember when I have sat under his Shadow with great Delight, and his Fruit has been sweet unto my Taste. My Soul has follow'd hard after him, and I have Reason to remember his Love more than Wine. But alas! I have too much Occasion for that [Page]Prayer, Lord increase my Faith! Without Controversy, Great is the Mystery of Godliness; and I am too often apt to stumble at the Cross. My Temptations to Unbelief often find me much sorrowful Employment; and at best my Faith is but weak and languid. O my God, Perfect that which is lacking in my Faith; and when I find its Strength, I shall not doubt its Reality?’

SECT. V.

I must also enquire concerning my Repentance. An Impenitent Communicant I know, must be an unworthy one. That I am a Sinner, is a Matter past Question, and that as such I am expos'd to the Displeasure of God; so that if he should enter into Judgment with me, I could not stand; is what I know and believe. Yea, that the least Sin I ever committed deserves the Wrath and Curse of God, both in this World, and that which is to come. But all this is general and [Page]common; let me therefore, O my Soul, press the Matter close and Home. And,

First, Have I laid these Things to Heart? Have my Convictions been affecting? Have I not only known, but felt these Things? Have I been weary and heavy laden under a Sense of Sin? Have I groan'd and trembl'd under the Apprehension of God's Displeasure? Has Destruction from the Lord been a Terror to me? Has my flesh trembled for fear of Him; and have I been afraid of his Judgments? Yea, have I been asham'd of Sin, as a nauseous, loathsom, filthy Thing, contrary to the Nature and Law of God, and my own Happiness too; which consists in Conformity to God, and Enjoyment of him? Has the Remembrance of my Sin fill'd my Heart with Grief, and my Face with shame? Especially considering how it has been committed against a God of Infinite Love and Goodness? Does this Thought give a Peculiar Accent to my Grief, that I have sinn'd against a Bleeding, Dying Jesus, and a forbearing and [Page]forgiving God? And does the Apprehension of pardoning Mercy, thro' a Redeemer, promote in me the most kindly Relentings? according to that, Ezek. 16.63.

In the next Place; Have I been influenc'd by these Convictions to take up a hearty and Sincere Resolution of better Obedience? Do I hate every false Way? and have I a Respect to all God's Commandments? Oh! let me remember, that nothing is Repentance that consists with an Habitual Love to any Sin, or an allowed Aversion to any Instance of Duty, or Branch of Holiness? Is my Heart and Life chang'd? He that is the same after Repentance as he was before, can never be accounted a true Penitent.

O my Conscience be faithful: Have I put off the old Man with his lusts, and put on the New Man, which after God is created in Righteousness and true Holiness?

I hope it is thus with me, in some Measure, that tho' I offend in many Things, I allow my self in nothing, that [Page]God in his Word disallows. But alas! my Repentance is far short of what I know it shou'd be, and wish it were.

‘Oh that He, whose Gift Repentance (as well as Faith) is, would carry on the Work which I trust, is begund Lord, open my Eyes, that I may see more of the Evil of Sin. Strike this Heart, this Rock, that it may more freely bleed at the Remembrance of my past Follies: Confirm my Resolutions, that I may have nothing more to do with Idols; but may be stedfast and unmovable, and always abounding in the Work of the Lord. Search me and try me, and see if there be any wicked Way in me, and lead me in the Way Everlasting.’

SECT. VI.

I Must also Examine my self concerning my Love, an essential and comprehensive Grace. If I don't sincerely love the Master of the Blessed Feast, and all the Regular Guests, I can't be welcome. Come then, O my Soul, is thy [Page] Heart circumcised to love the Lord thy God with all thy Heart, Deut. 36.6. and with all thy Soul? This is the First and Great Commandment. Canst thou truly say, that thy Desire is towards Him, and thy Delight in him? Dost thou love, not in Word and in Tongue, 1 John 3.18. but in deed and in Truth? Has He the Preheminence in thy Soul? Canst thou say, Whom have I in Heaven but thee, Psal. 73.25. and there is none upon Earth that I can desire besides thee? Is Christ precious to thee beyond Comparison and Competition? And canst thou truly say, Yea, doubtless, I count all Things but Loss, for the Excellency of the Knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord? Phil. 3.8.

Is thy Love to him a Rational Love, the Effect of serious Thought, and deep Conviction of his transcendent Excellency? Has the Spirit of God open'd thy Eyes, to see that He is the Chief of Ten Thousands, and altogether lovely? And [Page]thou tell what the Church's Beloved is more than another's Beloved?

Is it a constant and fixed Love? Not a sudden Flash, or transient Passion, but a rooted, settled Thing, a vigorous Flame, which many Waters can't quench, nor the Floods drown it? And tho' thy Love to some dear Creatures may unhappily be more passionate, yet art thou come to a Point, that thou wilt sacrifice the dearest Object, rather than part with Him whom thy Soul loves? But to bring the Matter to a more certain Issue; is thy Love Practical? This is an Infallible Test; for my Lord has said, Ye are my Friends if ye do whatsoever I command you. Joh. 15.14. Dost thou count his Yoak easy, and his Burden light? Are none of his Commandments grievous? Dost thou delight to do his Will, and hast thou chose his Testimonies, as a Heritage for over? Dost thou find his Love sweetly const [...]ining thee to the severest Instances of Selfdenial? And art thou fully purpos'd in a better Strength than thy own, that thou [Page]wilt fo [...] the lamb whithersoever he goes, what ever it costs thee? If it be thus with thee, thou mayst chearfully say, Lord, thou that knowest all Things, knowest that I love thee.

And as a yet farther Evidence, dost thou love thy Neighbour as thy self? Hast thou a real love for all Men, and a special, peculiar one for thy fellow Christians? Is there no Man to whom thou dost not most heartily wish well, whatever Provocations he has given thee, or Injuries he has done Thee? Tho' thou hast many Enemies, has no Man an Enemy of thee? If there are those that hate thee with a cruel Hatred, canst thou appeal to God, that the Hatred is not mutual and reciprocal? Can'st thou sincerely pray, Forgive our Trespasses, as we forgive them that trespass against us.

And as to the People of God, dost thou honour and delight in 'em? Hereby we know that we are passed from Death to Life, [...] John 3.14. because we love the Brethren.

[Page] Dost thou love every Soul where thou seest the image of Christ? Is not thy Love consin'd to those of thy own Party, or Perswasion? But is it unrestrained and large, as that Catholick Church of which thou art a Member? Does this Love engage thee to all proper Acts of Kindness, and Expressions of Brotherly Love? Dost thou pity and help to the utmost of thy Power all those whom Christ calls Brethren, with this View, that what thou dost for them, terminates ultimately upon him, according to Mat. 25? Canst thou read the First Epistle of John, and thy Heart not condemn thee?

I hope my Love is sincere.

But O my God, how weak and how imperfect is it! I even hate my self, that I can love thee no more. I abhor my self that I love thy Christ no better, and blush to think that I am no more kindly affectioned to those whom thou hast loved with an everlasting Love; and with whom I hope to live and converse for ever.

[Page] My only Comfort is, that I would love thee; I desire to love thee; I long to love thee, even as thou would'st be loved, Lord, kindle my Spark into a Flame, and let that Flame be strong and steady. And especially grant that my Obedience may prove my Love to be of the right Kind. How can I say I love thee, if my Heart be not right with thee? And for thy Sake, may I love my Neighbour, especially the Happy Members of that Glorious Family to which it is my highest Honour to belong. O may I love them as my self, and in Honour prefer 'em before my self, and think, no Office of Love too mean for me to stoop to, in Imitation of Him, who came not to be ministred unto, Mat. 20.28. but to minister. This I pray, Phil. 1.9. that my Love may abound more and more, and being hearty and fervent in this Request, is, I hope, an Evidence that I do truly love thee. Oh! let me not be mistaken, for Jesus Christ his Sake. A [...] men.

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SECT. VII.

I Must also examine my self concerning my New Obedience. This I know is the ultimate Test of all my Pretences. Without it, Faith, Repentance, Love, &c. are empty Names; and insignificant Shadows. Is the Will of God my Law? his Word my Rule? and his Glory the end of all my Actions? Do I allow my self in the Commission of no known Sin, or Omission of no known Duty? Is it my constant Care to keep a Conscience void of Offence, both towards God and Man? Can my Closet, my Family, my Shop, my Companions, as well as the Publick Assembly's of God's People, beat me Witness, that notwithstanding my unallowed Failings, I do endeavour to walk in all the Ordinances and Commandments of God blameless? Am Iwilling to know my Duty, and careful to do it? Am I thankful for Instruction, and Reproof too? And do I count them my Friends that tell me the Truth? Are my remaining [Page]Corruptions, and my many Failings, Matter of Humiliation to me? Do I pray for Daily Grace as Heartily as for my Daily Bread, and can I appeal to the Searcher of Hearts, that I am never more in Earnest, than when I pray that I may be perfect in every good Work, Heb. 13 21. to do his Will. That I may be cleansed from all Filthiness, both of Flesh and Spirit, and perfect Holiness in the fear of the Lord. 2 Cor. 7.1. That I may be sanctify'd wholly, 2 Thes. 5.23. and my whole Spirit, Soul and Body, be preserved blameless, to the coming of our Lord.

I hope it is thus with me in some Measure.

‘But, O my God, let me not be deceiv'd. If my Obedience be feigned, or partial, or Legal, if it do not exceed that of the Scribes and Pharisees; if I have a Form of Godliness without the Power, or a Name to live while I am dead; discover to me the worst of my [Page]self, that I may be upon a Right Bottom, and may get that Gospel Holiness, without which I cannot see the Lord. If there be a good Work begun, O carry it on to the Day of Jesus! and let the solemn Ordinances I am preparing for, be a Means of my Spiritual Nourishment, and Growth in Grace, Amen.’

SECT. VIII.

I Hope I have been Impartial in my Self-Examinations. And tho' upon Review I find abundant Matter for Humiliation, yet I cannot co [...]lude my self a Hypocrite, but must entertain some good Hope, thro' Grace, that I am [...] Sincere, tho' very Imperfect Christian, and shall be a welcome Guest at my Lord's Table.

That which now remains is, that I put my self in as good a Posture as may be, to meet my Lord at that Solemnity, that I may not provoke his Displeasure, nor baulk my own Exp [...]ctations. To [Page]this End I must see that every Grace be in lively & vigorous Exercise, lest having in my Flock a Male, I should Vow and Sacrifice to the Lord a Corrupt Thing. Mal. 1.14.

I am sensible, Faith is a Principal and Leading Grace. It is the Substance (or confident expectation) of Things hoped for, Heb. 11.1. and 6. and the Evidence of Things not seen. Without Faith it is impossible to please God. I cannot question the Being of a God, and the Certainty of a Future State, which are the great Principles of Natural Religion, and presuppos'd to all Revealed. I believe that God is, and that he is the Rewarder of all them that diligently seek Him. But this is not enough; my Lord has said, Ye believe in God, John 14.1. believe also in me. No Knowledge of the only true God is sufficient to Eternal Life, while Men are ignorant of that Jesus Christ whom He h [...]s sent. John 17.3. Come then, O my Soul, let [Page]thy Faith in Him be strong and lively. Have I not abundant Evidence, that Jesus is the Messiah, the Christ of God,John 6.27.3, 39. that Him hath God the Father sealed. The Scriptures of the Old Testament testify of Him. To Him Moses and all the Prophets bear Witness. In him there was a full and exact Accomplishment of every Promise and Prediction. In Him are the Substance of all the Legal Shadows, and to Him referr'd all the Types, &c. He was evidently the Promis'd Seed the Shiloh, the Branch, &c. of the Antient Fathers,Lev. 1. who waited for the Consolation of Israel.

Consider, O my Soul, what a Glorious Testimony God bore to Him by a Voice from Heaven, by vast Numbers of great, publick, and uncontested Miracles; and finally, by raising Him from the Dead: Of which He appointed Competent Witnesses, Men of Ability and Integrity; who could not be impos'd upon in so plain a Matter, and who could never [Page]be suppos [...] [...] practice upon the World [...] [...]re was no Interest in View that should engage 'em in so base a Design. And it's utterly impossible that Men in their Wits should be guilty of the Blackest Villany, in Prospect of nothing but Misery and Ruin. Besides, did not God also bear them Witness, Heb. 2.4. both with Signs and Wonders, and divers Miracles, and Gifts of the Holy Ghost? To which may be added this other Consideration; That that Doctrine must needs be from God, which has so visible and peculiar a Tendency to make Men God-like, in the Temper of their Minds, and Course of their Actions. That Gospel must needs be the Grace of God which teaches us so effectually, that denying Ungodliness, Tit. 2 11, 12. and all Worldly Lusts, we should live Soberly, Righteously and Godly, in this present evil World. I find by the Records of past Ages, and the Observations I have made in the Compass of my own Acquaintance, [Page]That the best Christians have been the best Men. And, O my Soul canst thou not bear thine own Testimony, that the Interest of God in thee, bears a constant Proportion to the Measure of thy Faith in Christ Jesus? Dost thou not always find, that when thy Faith is ready to fail, the good Things that remain are ready to die? And on the contrary, Is thy Heart ever so pure, and thy Life so clean, as when thy Faith is vigorous and lively? Now can any thing be more incredible, than that the Great God should make use of an Imposture to renew his own Image upon the Souls of Men? I will as soon believe any Absurdity, as that the most Holy God should erect and support his Kingdom in the World by a Lye, and destroy the Interest of the Devil, by Arts and Methods perfectly Hellish and Diabolical.

Come then O my Soul, be strong in Faith, Rom. 4.20. giving Glory to God. It's true, Believing is hard Work; but consider whence the [Page]Difficultys arise! from a Corrupt Heart, and a Malicious Enemy: And let this Thought be a further Evidence to the Credibility of the Doctrine of the Cross. Why should a base Heart, and a busy Devil, make such mighty Opposition to the Work of Faith? If it were not the Work of God, the Enemys of God would never make such Efforts to hinder it: The Devil would cherish his own Creature: The World would love its own, and the Flesh would never express such a Reluctancy against the Gospel, if it were not Spiritual in its Tendency, and Divine in its Original. Therefore, O my Soul, let me form Arguments out of Difficultys, and Pave my Way with the very Stumbling Blocks that are thrown in it.

It is indeed an astonishing Thought that God should become M [...]n, and that Man die: Without Controversy, 1 Tim. 3.16. great is the Mystery of Godliness, &c. But let not this stagger thee. Consider seriously that the [Page]more awful & surprizing the Mysteries of the Gospel are, the more likely they are to be from God? who can scarce be suppos'd to declare any Thing but what was extraordinary, and out of the Reach of unassisted Reason, with such a solemn Pomp, annd Train of mighty Works, as were wrought to confirm the Mission of our Lord. It would have been Matter of Suspicion, if Christ and his Disciples had preach'd nothing but what the Pagan Philosophers taught, and the Jewish Doctors owned. And it should recommend the Doctrine of Christ to a considering unprejudic'd Mind, that it was to the Jews a Stumbling-Block, 1 Cor. 1.23. to the Greeks Foolishness.

Are not these Things so? Come then, O my Soul, believe and be established.

But, O wretched Man that I am, VVho shall deliver me from this evil Heart of Unbelief? It is not bare External Evidence that will produce a Divine Faith. [Page]Faith I know is the Work, the mighty Work of God, and produc'd in the Heart by no less Power than that which rais'd up Jesus from the Dead. Ep. 1.19.28. It is not of our selves; it is the Gift of God.

‘And therefore, O my God, I turn me unto thee, in whose Hand my Heart is, and who canst prevail against the united Force of my confederate Enemies; and not only begin, but carry on the VVork of Faith with Power. I believe, Lord help mine Unbelief, and perfect that which is lacking in my Faith. Not only propose the Object, but open my Eyes, that I may no more question what the Gospel reveals than what my Eyes see; that believing in him whom I do not see, I may rejoyce with Joy unspeakable and full of Glory.’

CECT. IX.

I Must also remember my Lord in the Exercise of Holy Love, And, O my Soul, if thou dost believe, thou canst not [Page]chuse but love. View thy Lord in his Glory and Beauty: Confider Him as the Brightness of his Father's Glory, Heb. 1. and the express Image of his Person; think of him as the chief of Ten Thousands, and altogether lovely; as one whom all Created Brightness, Sweetness, Purity and Perfection, does but faintly represent; as one in whom all that's lovely meets and triumphs; as one whom the highest Angels worship, and by whom the most shining Seraphs are Eclips'd, who yet adore prostrate, and veil before him with more Exultation and Rapture than they would govern a Thousand Worlds. Think of him as one whose Glorys no Thought can reach, nor Words express; and whom the Multitude of the Heavenly-Host will view with everlasting Surprize and Admiration, as an Object ever new, and infinitely entertaining; and as desiring no farther Happiness than to be with him where he is, and behold his Glory. John 17.24.

And, O my Soul, consider [Page]that this Glorious Person, who is in himself so infinitely lovely, has been Infinitely kind to thee! Need this be prov'd, or can the Instances of it be forgotten? Did not his Love to thee appear beyond all Contradiction, in his Incarnation, Birth, sufferings and Death, with all the Circumstances of Humility that attended his Passage thro' this Vale of Tears, this waste & howling VVilderness, to that Better Country, where he is still mindful of his People, as ever living to make Intercession for 'em? He loved thee before thou or Time were. He lov'd thee when he was on Earth, with a Love stronger than Death, which many Waters could not quench, nor Floods drown. He loves thee now he is in Heaven; & tho' he be exalted to the highest Dignity, far above [...] Principalitys and Powers, and sits at the Right Hand of God as Lord of all, yet hast thou the same Place in his Heart, and the same Share in his Affectionate Remembrances. Long Absence, great Distance, high Preferment, Multiplicity of Affairs, which [Page]impair common Friendship, have no Influence [...]e. Having loved his own which were in the VVorld, John 13.1. he does and will love them to the End; and that with a Love more Constant, Steady and Regular, than the Revolutions of the Heavenly Bodys, & settled Course of Nature. Nor is this Love of his an Empty Name. Consider, O my Soul, the Glorious Effects of it. 'Tis a Love big with Blessings; Blessings which no Tongue can represent, and nothing here below resemble, but with a great deal of Faintness and Imperfection.Rev. 1.5. He has loved me and washed me from my Sins in his Blood. He was made Sin for me that I might become the Righteousness of God in him. 2 Cor. 5. He was wounded for my Transgressions, and bruised for mine Iniquitys, the Chastisement of my Peace was upon him, and by his Stripes I am healed. Isaiah 53.3. Being justified by Faith, I have Peace with God Rom [...]. [Page] him, and by him Access with Boldness to the Throne of Grace. Heb. 4. To his Expensive Love, as the Meritorious Cause, I owe my Regeneration; that I am begotten again to a lively Hope: My Adoption, that I am call'd a Child of God: My Sanctification, my Peace, Comfort and Joy; and finally, my Hopes of Eternal Life; which is all that Heart can wish, and Ten Thousand, Thousand Times more; for the Things which God hath prepared for them that. 1 Cor. 2.9. love him, have not enter'd into the Heart of Man.

Nor let me, O my Soul, forget who is the unworthy Object of all this Glorious Love, What am I, and what is my Father's House, that I should be thus highly favour'd? That the Prince of Life, the Living God, should set his Heart upon such a Dead Dog! That a vile Worm, sinful Dust and Ashes, shou'd be so regarded by him whom all the Angels worship, Heb. 1, whom the whole Creation obeys, and in Comparison [Page]of whom all Created Beings are as the Drop of a Bucket, and the small Dust of a Ballance! Nothing, yea less than nothing, and Vanity! Behold what manner of Love is this! Expression is at a Loss, and silent Admiration must supply its Place.

Now, does not this Love deserve Love? Whence is it, O my Soul, that thou art no more affected? That in these Musings the Fire burns no more? One would think, that upon such a Subject, serious Thought should exalt even a Spark of Love into a Flame of Transport and Extasy! and whence is all this Coldness?

Oh 'tis from my Evil Heart of Unbelief! The Things are so great that they even exceed Belief! But let me consider that Gods Ways are not as ours, nor his Thoughts as ours, Isa. 55.8, 9. but [...]ore above 'em than the Hea [...] are above the Earth! and that his Ben [...]s are in suitable Proportion to his own Greatness. Royal Favours use to be vast and magnificent: They give like [Page]Kings; and what less can be expected from the King of Kings, the Infinite Majesty of Heaven and Earth, than what he has pleas'd to appoint for his Favourites! And the more mean the Objects of his Love are, the more Glorious his Bounty! The lower his Goodness stoops, the higher it rises! But that it should stoop so low as me, the least, and less than the least of all Saints, nay the very Chief of Sinners; This, this staggers my Faith, and makes me ready to cry out, It's impossible, it can never be, That God should love such a Worm, such a Devil as I am! A vile Traitor, that have broken his Laws, despis'd his Grace, quenched his Spirit, trampled under Foot his Son! an ungracious Dog, that has turn'd his Grace into VVantonness, and continued in Sin in spite of all Reclaiming Methods! A Backsliding, Treacherous, perjur'd Beast! and under the Convictions of all this no more mov'd than a Clod or Rock! a stupid Hard-hearted Sinner! This I must confess I find difficult to believe; and [Page]when I can hope, I wonder at my self that I can venture to do it; and adore the Grace and Merey of God, that I han't long ago been a Cain or Judas, or at least a Spira, a Magor Missabib, a Terror to my self and all about me, by Reason of the Blackness and Horror of my Despair!

And yet here Infinite Mercy, and Infinite Merit, are a Relief! I will believe that there is Mercy for the worst, because God has said it, and won't venture to except my self, because God han't done it. All things are possible with God; Luke 7.42 he can forgive frankly Ten Thousand Talents as well as a few Pence: And he will forgive manifold Iniquities, and mighty Sins, to every penitent, humble, willing Soul. I must not deny the Grace of God, and therefore if I do avouch this Character, consequently I must believe.

And then how can I chuse but love? Oh my Soul, fall with the lowest Prostrations, at the Feet of thy dearest Jesus; [Page]and if thou canst do no better, exp [...]ess thy Love by Sighs and Blushes, that thou canst love him no more.

‘But, Lord, I may Expostulate with my self till I am weary, if thy Grace be with-held, and thy Spirit deny'd! O shed abroad thy Love in my Heart, by the Holy Ghost given unto me; Strike this Rock and it shall melt, breath upon this Clod and it will warm. Draw me and I shall run after thee. I cannot say that I do love thee, but I am sure I can say that I would love thee. This Thou knowest, that knowest all Things. I can appeal to thee, that if I might have my wish, I would love thee better than ever a Saint on Earth, yea than ever an Angel in Heaven does. I had rather love thee as I ought to love thee than be Master of all the Treasures on Earth; rather than have all the Monarchs of it at my Feet, rather than have all that the World admires, at my Disposal. I had rather (Lord thou knowst) die in an Extasy of holy Love, and breath [Page]out my Soul into the Arms of the Holy Jesus, than live Ten Millions of Years; yea to all Eternity, in the Fulness of all Created Enjoyments. O my God, is not this a Request after thine own Heart, when I pray that I may love thee with all my Soul, and that I may not be most flat and heavy, cold and Lifeless, at that Solemnity where are the Memorials of the choicest and most glorious Love that was ever known or heard of.’

SECT. X.

I Must also, at the Lord's Table, be in a Penitent Frame. The Remembrance of my Lord's Dying Love must melt my Heart into a Kindly Sorrow for those Sins which wounded and slew him.John 53.10. His Soul was made an Offering for my Sin, and shall not my Heart bleed at the Thought of that bitter Cup in which my Sins were, deadly Ingredients, and which for my Sake [...] drank off, even to the very [Page]Dregs! O my Soul, when I remember my Saviour, I must penitently remember my Sins, from which he dy'd to save me. My Sins! How wide a Field! How vast a Subject! I am amaz'd, and stagger at the General Prospect, and must be swallowed up and lost in Particulars! Where shall I begin, and where shall I end? Indeed I may begin at the Root. Behold I was shapen in Iniquity, Psal. 51.5, and in Sin did my Mother conceive me! But the numerous Branches ex [...]ed Calculation! I know not the Numbers thereof! The Commandment of God is exceeding Broad, and in Proportion to it I must estimate my Guilt! What Commandment have I not broken? In what Instance have I not offended? As to my Sins of Ignorance, and common Frailtys, I must only sigh and say, Who can understand his Errors? Psal. 19.12. For to remember and [...]ment my grosser Follys will be a long, as well as sorrowful Employment, and take up more Time than my Circumstances can allow. But, [Page]O my Soul, I charge thee mourn over the more Heinous Offences of thy Life. Read over thy Kalender, and drop a Tear upon the Black Days there.Bp. Wilkins.

N. Here call sorrowfully to Mind such particular Sins as have been more especially Heinous.

And tho' I hope God has forgiven thee, yet, O my Soul, never forgive thy self. O what shall I say! I blush, Ezra 9.6, and am asham'd to list up my Face to thee my God! I could have no Peace, no Patience, no Hope were it not for such a Word as that:1 John 1.7 The Blood of Jesus Christ, his Son, cleanses from all Sin.

I would also particularly review my Conversation since the last Sacrament: And here I can find Matter enough for Shame and Grief. Oh! Wretch that I am how unsuitable has my Conversation, [Page]been to the Profession and Engagements I so lately made, and the sweet Experiences I so much rejoye'd in, and seem'd so thankful for!

N. Here fix your Thoughts upon the grosser Follys of the preceding Month.

Was such an Action becoming what thou didst so lately, at the Lord's Table, pretend and promise? Was such a Management worthy of a Christian, and becoming a Communicant? Did the Indulgence of such a Fleshly Lust become a Disciple of the Holy Jesus the Immaculate Lamb of God? Did it become a Sheep of Christ's Flock, to wallow like a Swine in that Mire? Was that Pride, that Passion, that Malice, Envy, and Uncharitableness, suitable to thy solemn Profession of retaining to him who came to destroy the Works of the Devil? Remember and be confounded, ¹ and never open thy Mouth any more because of thy Shame! Surely I am more[Page]bruitish than any Man, and have not the Understanding of a Man!

And, O my Soul, shall not the Time past suffice thee to1 Pet. 4.3. have acted so inconsistently and unaccountably? Surely it becomes me to say, If I have done Iniquity I will do so no more. Let these be my sincere Resolutions, and let me, at the Lord's Table, bind my self in fresh Bonds, that my [...]uture Walk shall be more Circumspect; that my Devotions shall be more Regular, my Dealings more Just, my Charity more Extensive, and my Whole Conversation more Spiritual.

‘O my God, this is my full Purpose; but let me not want that Grace which alone is sufficient for me. Give me true Repentance, let me take up sincere Resolutions, and let the Uprightness of my Heart in both, appear in a suitable Behaviour for Time to come. So be it for Jesus Sake.’

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CHAP. V. The Christian at the Lord's Table.

SECT. I.

NOW, O my Soul, the good Hand of God upon thee has brought thee into his House, and set thee at his Table! Behold all things are ready! See to it that thou be ready to meet and entertain thy Lord.

‘Awake: O North Wind and come thou South,Cant, 4.16. blow upon my Garden that the Spices thereof may flow out. Let my Beloved come into his Garden, and eat his pleasant Fruits. When the King comes in to see his Guests,Mat. 22.11. may not I be the Man that wants a Wedding Garment?’

[Page] 'Tis an Awful Solemnity! O my Soul, approach with Reverence and Godly Fear. This is none other but the House of God, Gen. 28.17. and this is the Gate of Heaven. Let my Frame be suitable, Spiritual and Heavenly.

O my God, keep off the Tempter, keep out the World, keep down my Corruption.

Let no Lust defile: Let no Business engage: Let no Impertinent Thought divert my Mind, Unite my Heart; and let it be intent and fix'd on thee.

Thy Grace, O Lord, is sufficient for me. Let thy Strength be made perfect in my Weakness.

Work in me both to will and to do. Strengthen me with all Might, by thy Spirit, in the Inward Man,

Call up my Faith and Love, and every proper Grace, into lively and vigorous Exercise.

Blessed Jesus, without thee I can do nothing. I can do all things thro' Christ strengthening me. Draw me I will run after thee.

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SECT. II. While the Minister is breaking the Bread.

THUS was the Body of my Lord broken! It pleased the Lord to bruise him, and put him to Grief! Isa. 53.10.5.

He was bruised for our Iniquity's!

Oh let me view the Representation of his Broken Body, with a Broken Heart, and a Contrite Spirit!

Hard indeed must that Heart be which such a Sight will not affect!

Methinks I see his precious Body scourged and pierc'd! It's an affecting Thought, that perfect Innocence should be thus treated! But when I consider that this Innocent Lamb was at the same Time God over all blessed for ever, and that he underwent all this for me, what must my Heart be, if it ben't affected!

And while his Body was thus bruised, [Page]the Iron enter'd into his Soul: Who can imagine what our Lord felt, when he cry'd out, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?

See here what an evil and bitter Thing Sin is, and how abominable in the Sight of God, when no less a Sacrifice could appease incensed Justice!

Here is Grace! Here is Love! That God should prepare his own Son a Body, and that in that Body he should bear our Sins on the Tree! 1 Pet. 2.24.

SECT. III. While the Minister is pouring out of the Wine.

THUS was my. Lord [...]s Blood shed for me!

We are redeem'd, not with Corruptible Things, 1 Pét. 1.19. as Silver and Gold; but with the precious Blood of Christ, as of a Lamb without Blemish and without Spot.

[Page] If the Blood of Bulls and Goats sanctifieth to the purifying of the flesh, Heb. 9.13, 14. how much more shall the Blood of him who thro' the Eternal Spirit offer'd himself without Spot, to God, Purge your Consciences from dead Works, to serve the living God?

Oh let me view a Bleeding Jesus with a Bleeding Heart!

Behold the Fountain set open for Sin and for Uncleanness! 1 John 1.7. The blood of Jesus Christ cleanses from all Sin.

Approach, apply, O my Soul, wash and be clean. Purge with this Hyssop, Psal. 51.7. and thou shalt be clean; wash in this Laver, and thou shalt be whiter than the Snow.

What may not be expected from the Blood of God? Acts 20.28. The Blood of him that was God?

Oh how freely did he let out his Blood! View with Transport those Streams of Love, and think how much thou owest to him that so freely said down his Life for thee!

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O my God, enlarge my Heart in Love to such a Friend; and never let my Heart be straitned towards Him, who open'd his Veins, and so freely Bled and dy'd for me.

May my Eye affect my Heart; and may I with the utmost Tenderness remember what Evidences he has given of his Love to me. Was ever Love like this!

SECT. IV. Taking the Bread, &c.

BLessed Jesus, Thou art that Bread of Life. John 6.48. Thy Broken Body is food for Souls.John 6.49. Oh let me by Faith Eat and live, Eat and never die. John 6.59.

‘When Judas took the Sop Satan entr'd into him. Lord grant, that as I receive this Bread, Christ may enter, and take an Eternal Possession of my Soul.’

Now, O my Soul, take a whole Jesus [Page]with a whole Heart, for a whole Salvation.

Lord, I am not worthy thou shouldst come under my Roof.

I am indeed infinitely unworthy; but I hope, thro' Grace, not utterly unwilling.

O were but my Appetite to this Spititual Food equal to my Need of it, how wide would my Soul open her Mouth, Psal. 81. and how full would she be fill'd!

Oh thou that hast provided Bread, give me an Appetite, and abundantly bless my Provision.

Lord encrease my Faith. O let this Bread be blest to my Spiritual Nourishment, and Growth in Grace.

O that I may receive, out of Christ's Fullness, John 1.16. even Grace for Grace! By these Royal Dair [...]tys may my lean and withering Soul become Fat and Flourishing. Psal. 92.

His Flesh is Meat indeed. John 6.55.

[Page] O my Soul, accept and resign; take a Jesus and surrender thy self. My Lord and my God, I am thine, save me.

I avouch the Lord this Day to be my God. His I am, Acts. 27.23 [...] and Him I'll serve.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, Ephes. 1.3. who hath blessed us with all Spiritual Blessings, in Heavenly Places, in Christ.

Blessed be God for Jesus Christ.

Thanks be to God for his unspeakable Gift.

SECT. V. Taking the Cup, &c.

THis Cup is the New Testament in my Lord's Blood! 1 Cor. 30.25.

I will take the Cup of Salvation, and pay my Vows.

Christ's Blood is Drink indeed! John 6.5 [...].

[Page] I take this Cup of Blessing, and O adored be his Love that was made a Curse for me,Gal. 3.13. that he might fill this Cup with Blessing.

O how freely did my Lord drink of the Brook in the Way! Psal. 110. Remember O my Soul, that Love which made him say,John 18.11. The Cup which my Father hath given me shall I not drink it? It was a bitter Cup to him, and yet he drank the very Dregs of it. It is a Cup of Blessing to me, and shall I not chearfully drink of it in Remembrance of Him?

Blessed Jesus, Thou hast drank at the Hand of the Lord, John 51.17. the Cup of his Fury: Thou hast drunken the Dregs of the Cup of Trembling, and wrung them out; and hast put into my Hand this Cup of Consolation. Behold what manner of Love!

O precious Blood, that cleanses from all Sin!

Drink, O my Soul, and remember Jesus.

[Page] Drink, and mourn over thy Sins and Follys.

Drink, and receive thy Pardon.

Drink, and renew thy Covenant.

Drink, and forget thy Sorrows.

Drink, and forgive thy Enemies.

Drink, and triumph over the Adversaries of thy Soul.

Drink, and rejoyce in hope of the Glory of God.

Blessed Jesus, I will remember thy Love more than Wine. Cant. 1.4.

Unto him that hath loved us, Rev. 1.5, 6. and washed us from our Sins in his Blood, and hath made us Kings and Priests unto God, and his Father. To him be Glory and Dominion. for ever and ever. Amen.

Blessed be God for Jesus Christ.

Thanks be unto God for his unspeakable Gift.

SECT. VI. At the Conclusion of the Ordinance,Rev. 5, 12

WOrthy is the Lamb that was slain to receive [Page]Power, and Riches, and Wisdom, and Strength, and Honour, and Glory, and Blessing.

Blessing, Honour, Glory and Power, 13. be unto him that fitteth upon the Throne, and unto the Lamb, for ever and ever.

How amiable are thy Tabernacles, Psal. 84.1. O Lord of Hosts! Blessed are they that dwell in thy Courts. 4.

A Day in thy Courts is better than a Thousand. I had rather be a Doorkeeper in the House of my God, than to dwell in the Tents of Wickedness. 10.

And, O my Soul, if this Hour has been so sweet, while I beheld the King in his Glory, and the Land which is afar off, tho' it were as in a Glass darkly, what will an Eternity in Heaven be! When I shall see him as he is, and know as I am also known; When I shall be with him where he is, and behold his Glory! Make haste O my Beloved.

[Page] Thus I must remember my Lord 'till he comes. Blessed be God for such an Ordinance. But O that my Soul could even break for the Longing I have for that Second Coming;Heb. 9.28. when He shall appear to them that look for him, without Sin unto Salvation.

He has said, Behold I come quickly; even so Lord Jesus, Rev. 22.20. come quickly.

In the mean Time, O my Soul, remember where thou hast been, and what▪ thou hast been doing.

Thou hast open'd thy Mouth to the Lord, and must not go back. Thou hast bound thy Soul with an Oath. Thou hast sworn, and must perform it, to keep his righteous Judgments.

Thou hast avouched, this Day, the Lord to be thy God. Be true to Him. Let Him alone be Exalted in thy Soul. Be for Him, and not for another.

‘Now, O my God, I bless thee for the Liberty of thy House. I bless thee for the Aids of thy Spirit. The Shame [Page]of my Misbehaviour I take to my self; but all the Praise I give to thee. Oh by thy Grace help me, as I have received Christ Jesus the Lord, Col. 2.6. so to walk in Him, that where he is I, his unworthy Servant, may also be. Amen, and Amen.’

CHAP. VI. The Christian in his Retirements, after the Lords Supper.

SECT. I, When the Ordinance has been comfortable.

BLess the Lord, O my Soul, & all that is within me, Psal. 103.1.7.4, 5. Bless his holy Name. Bless the Lord, O my Soul, and forget not all his benefits: Who crowneth thee with loving Kindness, and tender Mercies: Who satisfieth thy Mouth with good things.

How Thankful ought I to be, that the Doors of God's House have been [Page]open to me, and that I have had the Freedom of his Table! Whence is this to me, that I who have long ago deserv'd to be shut up among the Spirits in Prison, and fed with the Bread of Affliction, and Water of Affliction, should be admitted a Guest at such a Feast! A Feast of fat things, and of Wines upon the Lees, well refined! That I should see the King in his Glory, and sit with him at his Table, who might have expected e'er now to have been banish'd for ever from his Presence, and have heard that killing Wood, See my Face no more!

Blessed be God, that he let me live to see this Day, this Joyful Day! That I was not prevented by a surprising Stroke, and led Captive by Death into the Chambers of that House appointed for all living, long before this!

Blessed be his Name, that I have been suffer'd to live no longer in the Neglect of such a sweet and profitable Ordinance! That he convinc'd me of my Duty, brought me to Resolve, and confirm'd [Page]my Resolutions! so that in spite of all the Malice of Satan, I have given up my self to the Lord, 2 Cor. 8.5. and to his Church, by the Will of God. This is what I had design'd once and again, but Satan hindered. Blessed be the Captain of my Salvation, that he has hinder'd no longer! That all the mighty Host of Objections he had muster'd up, could not deter me from my Duty;Psal. 110. that I was willing in the Day of his Power.

Blessed be God that my Natural Sloth, and Love of Ease, did not make me baulk a Duty which requires Industry, and Laborious Application, in proparing for it: That my Eagerness after the World did not make me grudge the Time which a worthy Communicant must redeem from his Secular Affairs, for this Solemn Service. Especially that my unbelieving Doubts and Scruples, Fears and Jealousies, did not put me by my Duty, under Apprehensions of Unfitness and Unworthiness.

[Page] I am also bound to praise Him for the Assistance of his Holy Spirit and Grace, That my Mind was in any Measure compos'd; That the Desire of my Soul was towards Him, and the Remembrance of his Name: That I have Reason to hope I was sincere, and acted in the Integrity of my Heart: Tho' I must blush that I did no better; I must bless Him I did so well. Not I but the Grace of God with me. Not unto us Lord, not unto us.

But O my Soul, don't let thy Gratitude be only in General Terms: Review the whole Affair, and be particular in thy Acknowledgments. There may be great Love express'd in Circumstances seemingly minute, the Recollection of which may afford great Delight, and does demand a grateful Resentment.

I am bound to bless my God, that by his Kind Providence he brought me to that Banquetting-House, Cant. 2.4. where his Banner over me was Love. That the Doors of his Sanctuary were open: That my Lot is [Page]not cast in those Places where the Synagogues of God are destroy'd, his Ministers driven into Corners, and devout Souls forc'd to gather the Heavenly Manna, their Spiritual Food, with the Peril of their Lives. Blessed be God that by the Favour of our Governours (whom the Lord bless and preserve) we may assemble together, and none make us affraid: That He prepares a Table for us in the Presence of our Enemies: Psal. 23 5. And if the Sons of Belial malign and curse us, they cannot destroy us, nay dare not disturb us. Blessed be God they can't insult us and say, Where is now your God? We may now go with the Multitude, go to the House of God with the Voice of Joy and Praise, Psal. 42.3, 4. with the Multitude that keep Holy-Day. Blessed be his Name, that we who can boldly avouch our selves to be of those that are quiet in the Land; Psal. 35.20. are allowed to enjoy our Native Rights, and are not by the Rulers counted [Page]Disturbers of the Publick Peace, or Hurtful to Kings. Ezra 4 15.

I must also praise Him, that no Evil befel me, nor Plague came nigh my Dwelling, which might have shut me up, tho' the Doors of his House were open: That my House was not shut up, and a Lord have Mercy, writ over it: That no Evil Disease cleaved to me;Psal. 41.8.38.7. nor were my Loins filled with a loathsome Disease, which should have confin'd me to my Bed, or Chamber, and forbid my going up to the House of the Lord: That the Secret of God was upon my Tabernacle, and no sore Calamity befel me, that would have unhing'd my Mind, and made me uncapable of attending at the Ordinance, with any Composure and Devotion. Blessed be God that I had not Occasion for Aaron's Apology, when he had neglected to eat the Sin-Offering in the Holy Place, &c. and Moses Expostulated with Him upon it. Such things have befallen me, Levit. 10.19. and if I had eaten the Sin-Offering to Day, [Page]should it have been accepted in the Sight of the Lord? Especially I would be thankful that God did not with-draw his Spirit, unchain the Devil, and let loose my Corruption, so that being overtaken with some Heinous Fault, or harass'd with some grievous Temptation, I should not have dar'd to approach to the Jealous God in that Holy Ordinance! but my Place must needs he Empty, because an accusing Devil, and condemning Conscience, would clamour and say, He is not clean, 1 Sam: 20.26. surely he is not clean!

I would also praise my God that I was not disappointed by his Hand upon the Minister the Steward of these Mysteries; that Sickness, or other Calamities, did not disable him for his Master's Service: That God was with him, according to his kind Promise: That Christ Jesus was with his Spirit, and gave him the Tongue of the Learned to speak a World in Season. How awfully did he warn us that we should not presume to approach without [Page]the Wedding-Garment! How sweetly did he encourage every devout and willing Soul, to come with Beldness to the Throne of Grace, and by Faith to draw Water out of the Wells of Salvation! How pathetically did he represent the Sufferings of our Lord! How earnestly press Faith in his Blood, and Conformity to his Death How passionately did he recommend his Example, and encourage Ʋniversal. Obedience, by displaying the Happiness of those that serve and follow him; who shall be with Him where he is, and behold his Glory! How fervently did he pray for the Effusion of the Holy Spirit upon every sincere Soul! That God would remember us, from the greatest to the least, with the Love which he bears to his own, and visit us with his Salvation; that never a Communicant at that Table might be missing at the Right Hand of Christ another Day! That we might all sit down with Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, in the Kingdom of God, and enter into that Rest which remains for the People of [Page]God! Blessed be God that his Mouth was not shut, nor his Spirit straitned, as a just Punnishment of my Sins, whereby I have provok'd him to abridge me of those Privileges I have so wretchedly misimprov'd!

I must also bless his Name, that He did not deny his Grace, nor with-hold his Spirit, when I approach'd his Table: altho' my Preparations were so short, so vastly below the Standard of the Sanctuary, and my whole Management sadly defective; nevertheless I hope I did meet with Him whom my Soul loves: And the Kindness of my Lord exceeded my Expectations, as well as my Deserts. Blessed be God it did not fare with me according to the Presages of my guilty misgiving Heart. I expected killing frowns, and to my great Surprise, was welcom'd with reviving Smiles. He lift up the Light of his Countenance upon me, spoke good and comfortable Words [...] to me, and sent me away with Mirth, Gen. 21.27. and with Songs, with Tabret, and with Harp.

[Page] I will praise Him that He help'd my unbelief. That tho' I am of little Faith, it was not to seek when it should be in Exercise. I would affectionately remember his Kindness in enabling me to realize invisible Things, that when I saw the Elements, I could look thro' 'em to the Blessed Object they were appointed to represent. Tho' I am apt to be like unbelieving Thomas, yet then (thorough my Saviour's adorable Condescension) I was not faithless, Jo. 20.27, 28. but believing. He so discover'd himself to my Soul, that I could not forbear saying, My Lord, and my God. I thought I no more doubted that Jesus was the Messiah, Him whom God the Father sealed, than if I had been by when there came such a Voice to Him from the Excellent Glory; 2 Pet. 1.17. This is my boloved Son, in whom I am well pleased. I thought I as firmly believ'd his Dying upon the Cross for my Sins, as tho' I had been present at the Awful Spectacle; as tho' I had [Page]stood by with the Blessed Virgin and the Beloved Disciple. John 19.23. I [...]aw by Faith his Body broken, and his Blood flow; what Inward Agonies his Countenance express'd when he cry'd out, My God, my God, why hast thou for saken me? And with how Glorious a Mixture of Majesty, Love, and Sorrow he look'd, when having said It is finished, He bowed his Head and gave up the Ghost. John 19.30.

I was enabled without any Hesitation, to believe that as He dy'd, so He rose again, according to the Scriptures. 1 Cor. 15.4. That tho' He was dead, Rev. 1.8. He is alive, and lives for evermore. I was almost in my own Mind, a Witness of his Ascension, doubting no more of it than if I had been among the Men of Galilee, Acts 1.10, 11. when He was taken up, and a Cloud received Him out of their Sight. I was as firmly perswaded of his Sitting at the Right Hand of God, there pleading the Cause, and managing [Page]the Affairs of his Church; as if my Eyes had seen the King in his Glory, Isa. 33.17. and the Land which is afar off. Yea I could, I thought, look for his Second Appearance (which is to be without Sin unto Salvation) with as much Confidence as if I had heard the Two Angels say,Acts [...]. 11. Why stand ye here gazing up into Heaven? this same Jesus which is taken up from you into Heaven, shall come in like manner as ye have seen Him go up into Heaven.

Yea, blessed be God, I was enabled to believe in this Jesus as my Saviour. I was encouraged to say, This Body was broken for me. This Blood was shed for me. The Son of God loved me, and gave himself for me.Gal. 2.20. And tho' I had a deep Sense of my own Unworthiness, and had manifold Iniquitys and mighty Sins to Mourn over, yet (praised be his Name) I was born above my usual Fears and Scruples, and by a Holy Violence, as [Page]'twere, oblig'd to believe in Hope, tho' against Hope. I saw my self vile and base as Hell,Rom. 4.18. one of the worst and chief of Sinners; and yet I durst not despair, because I had that Word set Home,1 John 1.7. The Blood of Christ cleanses from all Sin. My dear Lord seem'd to smile, and say Be of good Cheer, be not afraid, it is I. Come unto me ye that are weary and heavy laden; Mat. 11.29. John 6.37. and Him that cometh unto me I will in no wise cast out. Rev. 22.17. Whosoever will, let him take the Water of Life freely.

Indeed my unbelieving Heart was ready to say, How can these Things be? Can such a Worm be the Object of Everlasting Love? Can such a vile polluted Wretch pretend Relation to, and Interest in the Holy Jesus, and expect Admission into his Holy Hill? I was like Jacob when he heard the News of Joseph's [Page]being alive, and Lord of Egypt, His Heart fainted, Gen. 45.26. for he believed them not. But my Spirit was reviv'd when my Lord shew'd me the Provisions He had made for my going to possess the Kingdom: And when I was helped to consider that nothing is too great to be expected from infinite Mercy, thro' Infinite Merits. Blessed be God I could cry out, Lord I believe, help thou mine Unbelief.

I must also adore and Bless Him, that His Love was shed abroad in my Heart, Rom. 5.5. in a Degree beyond what I could have expected; considering what a Rock of Ice, what a stupid, senseless Thing this Heart is. I beheld my Lord's Glory, and could scarce forbear crying out, This is my Friend, this is my Beloved, Cant. 6.16. O ye Daughters of Jerusalem. I thought I saw Him as the Church describes Him, in the 5th of Canticles, and could heartily joyn in that Acclamation. Yea he is altogether lovely. Oh [Page]how did I wish for nearer Access to Him, and clearer Views of Him!Psal. 42. My Soul did thirst for God, for the living God: Yea, as the Hart panteth after the VVater Brooks, so did my Soul pant after Him. I could have been even willing to have dy'd in an Extasy of Love, that I might not have lost the Sight of so Glorious an Object to all Eternity.

Oh how did the Tokens of his Expensive Love affect my Soul, and fill me with Gratitude! I thought I could have dy'd a Thousand Deaths for Him who loved me and gave Himself for me. And O may I never forget how asham'd and confounded I was then, to think of the Sins and Miscarriages of my past Life. When I call'd to Remembrance some of the many Omissions and Commissions that are upon Record in my Conscience, how did my Heart smite me? Oh thought I, Is this thy Kindness to thy Friend! Dost thou thus requite the Lord, O foolish Creature, and unwise! Are these [Page]suitable Returns to such am [...]ing Love? For which of his good Works has he been thus treated, so neglected, so affronted by thee? Is it not High Time for me to awake out of Sleep, to take up more firm and steady Resolutions of better Obedience? Sure the Time past shall suffice to have acted so unworthy of a Christian, and of a Man, yea to have debas'd my self below the Beasts that perish? Isa. 1. For the Ox knows his Owner, and the Ass his Master's Crib.

Therefore I offer up my solemn Thanksgiving to God, that He has by his Spirit and Grace enabled me thus to Believe and Love; to Repent and Resolve. It is He has work'd in me both to will and do, and his shall be the Praise. Else it had been with me as at other Times, when to my Shame I must own I went to the Table dull, and return'd stupid, I went dejected and return'd disconsolate, when the whole of my Performane [...] was meer Bodily Exercise, which [...] [Page]found profited nothing. I must ascribe it to his Grace, that it was better with me than usual; for let others pretend what they will, for my part I find that I am not sufficient of my self to any thing Spiritually Good. In me, that is in my flesh, dwells no good Thing.

‘Now, O my God, accept my Thankful Acknowledgments. Let me keep a Sense of thy Love ever fresh upon my Soul. And especially help me to walk worthy of my Profession and Privileges;Heb. 10.29. let me never tread under Foot the Son of God, nor count the Blood of the Covenant, wherewith I am sanctify'd, an Unholy Thing. Amen, for Jesus Sake.’

SECT. II. When the Ordinance has not answer'd Expectation.

I Have been at the Table of my Lord, where He uses to meet and bless his [Page]People. I went with raised Hopes that (tho' infinitely unworthy, I should have Communion with the Father, 1 John 1.3. and his Son Jesus Christ; that I should be Richly entertained, and return Rejoycing: But alas how sadly am I disappointed! I came to the Pit and found no Water! Jer. 14.3. I am return'd with my Vessels empty! I am asham'd and confounded! I had prepar'd a Song of Praise, and thought to have clos'd the Festival with Hosanna's to the Son of David; but Wo is me, I am forc'd to hang my Harp upon the Willows. My Feast is turn'd into Mourning, Amos 8.10. and my Songs into Lamentation, and the End thereof as a Bitter Day. My Mind was dark, my Heart hard, my Thoughts confus'd, my Affections disorder'd, my Soul and all within me utterly out of Frame; I could neither believe, nor repent, nor hope, nor love, nor do any thing as I ought to do. I try'd and struggl'd with my self in vain. I was as it were fetter'd, [Page]pinion'd and becalm'd, and my very Heart asleep. In the mean Time my Enemys were lively, Psal. 38.19. the Devil busy, and the World Importunate; yea Ten Thousand Trifles amusing and distracting me.

O wretched Man that I am! When I should have been best I was worst!Rom. 7.24. When I would do good, Rom. 7.21. evil is present with me! I even tremble to think what a Guest I was at that Holy Table; and cannot but wonder that the Master of the Feast did not single me out and say,Mat. 22.12, 13. Friend, how camest thou in hither? That He did not say to his Servants, Bind Him Hand and Foot, and take Him away, and cast Him into outer Darkness. I am amaz'd at the Patience of God, that He could bear with such Trifling, and did not awaken my drowsy Soul by some terrible Judgment: That seeing the Threatning affected me no more, He did not try what the Execution would do, according [Page]to that 1 Cor. 11.30. For this Cause many are weak and sickly among you, and many sleep.

I adore the Divine Patience, and will not despair of Forgiveness thro' the Blood of Jesus. But I cannot forgive my self, and am even out of all Patience when I consider how stupid I have been, and how unaccountably I have manag'd. I could wish the severest Providence had detain'd me, that any thing but Sin, had prevented me from prophaning such an Ordinance, contracting so much Guilt, incurring such Danger, and creating my self so much Sorrow. But alas 'tis in vain, and perhaps unlawful, so to wish.

Come then, O my Soul, instead of spending Time in Fruitless Lamentations, consider seriously what the present Circumstance makes this Duty. Humble thy self deeply before God, and entreat his Favour. See if there be any Ground of Comfort, and labour to improve so sad a Disappointment (if [Page]possible) to some good Purpose.

‘God be merciful to me a Sinner. I acknowledge my, Iniquity, and desire to take to my self that Shame which is my Due. Against thee, O Lord,Psal. 51.4. have I sinned, and thou must be justify'd when thou speakest, and be clear when thou judgest. There was nothing wanting on thy Part. All things were ready. Mat. 22.4 I found a Table spread, and a Cup flowing. The Minister perform'd his Part faithfully and devoutly, and it was only my own Fault that it was not a sweet and edifying Ordinance to me, as well as others. It was my own Sloth, or Pride, or Unbelief, something or other in my self, that provok'd thy Spirit to withdraw, and caus'd thee to deny that Grace without which I can do nothing. I humbly confess, and heartily lament my walking unsuitably to the Vows I formerly [Page]made, and the Favours which I have heretofore receiv'd. I have at this Table sworn and not perform'd; had Peace spoken, and yet return'd again to Folly; enjoy'd sweet Communion with thee, and yet forgot, neglected, and provok'd thee: And therefore I was justly punished, in my Beloved's withdrawing Himself; Cant. 5.6. so that when I sought Him; I could not find Him; and when I called Him, He gave me no Answer: I will therefore ascribe Righteousness to my Maker, I will abhor my self, and repent in Dust and Ashes. Lord forgive me that my Preparations were so slight, my Self-Examination so superficial, my Meditations so loose, my Prayers so cold, and my Pains in the whole so little. Pardon me if I omitted Preparatory Dutys or laid too great a Stress upon, 'em: If Sloth prevail'd with me in neglect 'em, or Pride to trust to [Page]'em. Forgive me, if I by Eagerness in Worldly Business, Excessive Indulgence of the Flesh, in Meat or Drink, Sleep, or needless Recreations, by Intemperate Passion, or Imprudent Ordering of Affairs; I not only provok'd my God, but actually indispos'd my self for the Holy Solemnity. Of if I have been guilty of any Sin that I han't duly repented of, if I live in the Neglect of any known Duty, or under the Power of any unmortify'd Lust. Shew me I beseech thee, wherefore thou contendest with me, Humble me deeply, wash me throughly, and pardon me freely, for Jesus Sake. Amen.’

But, O my Soul tho' there be so great Reason for Humiliation and Self-Abasement, I must not be utterly discourag'd, and refuse to be comforted.

I must hope that my Heart has been right with God, and that I have not wilfully prevaricated and trifled with Him; [Page]therefore several Circumstanees may be consider'd, to check my Fears, and mitigate my Sorrows.

I do not serve a Hard Master, a Kind and Gracious God can make Allowancer for that Indisposition which may arise from Melancholy, or other Bodily Disorders; from extraordinary Affictions, violent Temptations, &c. He considers our frame, and knows that we are but Dust, and does not expect the same from frail Mortals as he does from the Angels in Heaven, and the Spirits of Just Men made perfect. That kind Expression of my Lord,Mat. 26.41. The Spirit indeed is willing, but the Flesh is weak, may be us'd to comfort Real Humble Christians; tho' it be often abu [...]d [...] harden the slothful and presumpt [...] [...] Formalist.

Let me also consider that I must not always conclude an Ordinance last [...] where the Affections have not been [...] There may be Real Communion wi [...] [...] [Page]where there is not a sensible Delight. The Sacrament may be bless'd to promote Humility and Real Holiness, tho' I have wanted sensible Meltings, and desir'd Manifestations; yea, it is very possible these may be with-held on a wise Design, to carry on the Work of God in my Soul, which seems to require a Variety of Dispensations; as Wind and Rain, Frost and Darkness, are in their proper Courses equally necessary to the Earth as Calm and Sun-shine. Hereby it may be God is teaching me to live more by Faith, upon the Righteousness and Fulness of Jesus; to distrust my self more, and censure others less; to be more watch [...]l. humble, charitable and compassionate. than ever. I may see Cause to bless God hereafter for what is so grievous now.John 13.7. I shall never forget that Saying of my Lord to Peter, What I do thou knowest not now, but thou shalt know.

[Page] Besides, I would remember that I cannot presently judge of the Benefit of an ordinance. That which is sown, in Tears, may be reap'd with Joy, tho', at present there be but small Appearance of it. The Spiritual Medicine may gradually mend my Constitution, tho' it don't operate sensibly, or prove an immediate Cure.

However, I have been doing my Duty, and God may accept my Honest Intentions, tho' he don't at present smile upon me and say, Well done good and Faithful Servant.

And after all, it's some Comfort to think that others have perform'd more acceptably, and met with [...] and Peace in Believing. And I thank God for this Sign of Grace, that I can rejoyce in other's being better, and more favour'd than my self.

But be Things as bed as a guidty Conscience and an accusing E [...] represents 'em? I will bless God [...] I have had Grace to bemoan my sel [...] [Page]lament my Folly, and cry to God for Mercy, thro' that Blood which can [...]one even for the Heinous Sin of having interpretatively counted it an Unholy Thing.

And now it remains that I resolve [...]riously, in a better Strength than my own, to manage better for the Time to come. And 'till an Opportunity offers to make a fresh Effort, let me walk humbly under a deep Sense of my Sin; let me be more strict and circumspect in my whole Conversation, and live every Day under the Awe of those Vows of God which are upon me. In an especial manner let me be careful to keep my self from Iniquity. Psal 18.23. That Sin to which by my Constitution, Business, &c. I am most enclin'd, and with which I am most frequently overtaken. Let me be peculiarly careful to perform those Dutys to which I find a corrupt Heart [Page]most averse. This will be the best way to retrieve the Loss I have sustain'd, God forbid that I should encourage my self in Future Neglects, by any Considerations whatsoever; yet I must believe that He remembers Christ in the Sacrament to the best Purpose I who under a Sense of what He has there profess'd and promis'd lives best after it: Being well assur'd that a Holy. Conversation, upon Gospel Principles and Motives, is a better Evidence of worthy Receiving, than all the Transports and Extasys imaginable. I would not be sati [...]sy'd without being affected; but surely the Principal Thing is by so apt a Means to be improv'd and better'd, to grew in Grate, and in the Knowledge of [...] Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.

Therefore I must make it my earnest and daily Prayer, that God would bless his Ordinance to this great End; [Page]or else my Labour will be lost, and my Expectations frustrate.

And Oh that he would vouchsafe his Blessing accordingly. Grant that I may never forget the Engagements I am under, but upon every Occasion remember that I am a Christian, and have solemnly own'd my self to be so before many Witnesses. That this Thought may be a Restraint from Sin, and a Spur to Duty, an Antidote against all the Poysonous Suggestions of the Grand Enemy of Souls; a Preservative from the Ill Example of those Children of Disobedience in whom he rules; Ephes. 2. and a Cordial under all the Troubles and A [...]lictions of this Mortal Life. May I find so great Benefit by thus waiting upon God, that I may long for the Return of such Seasons, and by Frequent Communion with Saints on Earth, be fitted for Better Company in a Better Wor [...], when I shall sit down with [Page]Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, in the Kingdom of God. yea be with Christ, where He is, and behold his Glory, which is all my Salvation, and all my Desire. AMEN.

FINIS.

Notes

1

Ezek. 16.63.

↵

[...] by D. Henchman in King-Street, Boston.

[Page]

MEditations on [...] Sanctification of the Lord's Day. And on the Judgments which attend [...] P [...]sa [...]tion of it. With seasonable Meditations [...] both Winter and Summer. By Increase Mather, D. D. Price Bound 1 s. 4 d.

THings to be more thought upon. A Brief Discourse on the Injuries offer'd unto the Glotious and only Saviour of the World: In many Instances, wherein the Guilty are seldome aware of their being so Injurious to the Eternal Son of God. Price Bound 1 s. 2 d.

A Monitor for Communicants. An Essay to Excite and Assist Religious Approaches to the Lords Table, Price St. 4 d. and 3 s. per Doz.

THe Will of a Father submitted to. The Duty of Patient Submission to every Condition, which the Providence of God, orders for the Children of Men. Enforced from the Glorious pattern of the Blessed Jesus, readily and cheerfully Submitting to take the Cup, which His Father had given Him.

These Three by Cotton Mather, D. D. and F. R. S.

A Humble Discourse of the Incomprehensibleness of God. Being the Substance of several Lecture Sermons, upon Job XI. 7, 8. By Benjamin Co [...]man, A. M.

THe Young Secretary's Guide, or a speedy [...]lp to Learning. In two Parts. Price Bound 28. By Thomas Hill, Gent.

THe Simple Cobler of Aggawam in America. Willing to help Mend his Native Country, [...]mentably Tattered, both in the Upper-leather and [...]; with all the honest Stitches he can take. And as willing never to be paid for his Work, by Old [...] wonted Pay. By Theodore de la Guard.

Information about this book

Title statement

Sacramental exercises or, The Christian's employment, before, at, and after the Lords Supper. By Jabez Earle.

Earle, Jabez, 1676?-1768.

Publication

Publisher

Text Creation Partnership,

Place of publication

Ann Arbor, MI :

Date

2011-05.

ID [DLPS]

N01464

ID [TCP]

N01464

ID [STC]

Evans 1739

ID [NOTIS]

APX5276

ID [IMAGE-SET]

1739

ID [EVANS-CITATION]

99022058

Availability

This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal. The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission.

Series

Early American Imprints, 1639-1800 ; no. 1739.

Notes

(Evans-TCP ; no. N01464)

Transcribed from: (Readex Archive of Americana ; Early American Imprints, series I ; image set 1739)

Images scanned from Readex microprint and microform: (Early American imprints. First series ; no. 1739)

Source

— Sacramental exercises or, The Christian's employment, before, at, and after the Lords Supper. By Jabez Earle., Earle, Jabez, 1676?-1768..

Extent

[5], 104, [1] p. ; 14 cm. (8vo)

Re-printed by T. Fleet, for Daniel Henchman, in King-Street,,. Boston: :: 1715.. (Evans, who locates no copy, gives imprint as: Boston: Printed by T. Fleet and T. Crump. 1715.) (Signatures: A-F^8 G^8(-G8) (E1 missigned D).) (Odd numbered pages on versos.) ("Books printed for, and sold by D. Henchman in King-Street, Boston."--p. [105].)

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