Natvral and morall questions and answers. Intermingled with many prettie and pleasant riddles, and darke sentences / written by A.P. ; with a manner of ordering the body for health through euery month of the yeare, and for dieting it for a seuen-night after blood-letting. Written in Latin verse by Ioachimus Camerarius. A. P. 1598 Approx. 161 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 70 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2014-11 (EEBO-TCP Phase 2). B07975 STC 19054.5 ESTC S94569 72799809 ocm 72799809 184116

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 Early English books online text creation partnership. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 2, no. B07975) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 184116) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1475-1640 ; 2229:4) Natvral and morall questions and answers. Intermingled with many prettie and pleasant riddles, and darke sentences / written by A.P. ; with a manner of ordering the body for health through euery month of the yeare, and for dieting it for a seuen-night after blood-letting. Written in Latin verse by Ioachimus Camerarius. A. P. Camerarius, Joachim, 1534-1598 Victvs et cultvs ratio. [140] p. Printed by Adam Islip., London, : 1598. "Victvs et cvltvs ratio exposita quatuor in singulos menses versibus, per Ioachimum Camerarium" at end p. 135-138. Ornament on t.p. ; headpieces ; tailpieces ; initials. Signatures: A-I⁸ (last leaf blank). Imperfect: pages torn and have print show-through, error in register. Reproduction of original in: Harvard University. Library.

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 eng Riddles -- Early works to 1800. Aphorisms and apothegms -- Early works to 1800. Questions and answers -- Early works to 1800. 2020-09-21 Content of 'availability' element changed when EEBO Phase 2 texts came into the public domain 2013-02 Assigned for keying and markup 2013-02 Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2013-05 Sampled and proofread 2013-05 Text and markup reviewed and edited 2014-03 Batch review (QC) and XML conversion

NATVRAL and Morall Queſtions and Anſweres. Intermingled with many prettie and pleaſant Riddles, and darke ſentences, Written by A. P. With a manner of ordering the body for health through euery month of the yeare, and for dieting it for a ſeuen-night after blood-letting. Written in Latin verſe by Ioachimus Camerarius.

LONDON, Printed by Adam Iſlip. 1598.
Naturall and Morrall Queſtions and Anſweres.
WHy hath Nature not giuen a ſting to the king of the Bees, and hath furniſhed all other Bees therewith?

Anſw. To teach Princes that nothing becommeth their dignitie leſſe then tyrannie, and that their onely defence ſhould conſiſt in the ſtrength and force of their ſubiects.

Queſt. What is that which oweth moſt, payeth leaſt, and of all euils is the worſt?

Anſw. Ingratitude, for that monſter receiueth good turnes and payeth vengeance.

Queſt. What thing in this life is not accompanied with feare?

Anſ. A good conſcience.

Quest. What are pleaſures?

Anſ. Enemies to chaſtitie, leaders to pouertie, the daughters of diſhoneſtie, and baits of extreame miſery.

Quest. What thing is begotten of a mother and anon the mother is begotten by it againe?

Anſw. Iſe turning to water.

Quest. What is man?

Anſ. An example of imbecillity, the ſpoile of time, an image of inconſtancy, a captiue of calamitie, a priſoner to paines, a ſeruant to couetouſneſſe, and finally a food of wormes.

Quest. When is fortune moſt to bee feared?

Anſw. When ſhe moſt flatters.

Quest. What thing is old ere it bee hatched?

Anſw. A ſecret grudge and malice long conceiued ere it be put in execution.

Quest. Who beleeue more other mens words then their owne eieſight?

Anſw. Women, for they giue more credit to them that fainedly call them beautiful, then to their looking glaſſe that doth gaineſay it.

Queſt. What is beautie?

Anſw. A gift of ſmall continuance.

Queſt. What good thing breeds lothſomneſſe?

Anſw. Plentie.

Queſt. What water is in the ſight of God moſt precious, and in the taſte of men moſt vnſauerous?

Anſw. The vnfained teares of a penitent ſinner.

Queſt. What is it that groweth with the head downeward, and with the root vpward?

Anſw. An iſeſickle.

Queſt. What is that which moſt delighteth and moſt deceiueth a woman?

Anſw. A mans diſsimulation, which hath ſuch a ſweet paſſage through his tongue as it delighteth as the Syren ſongs, and turnes to as deceitfull a concluſion as the Crockadiles teares.

Queſt. Wherein is couetouſneſſe only commendable?

Anſw. In ſparing and not ill ſpending his time.

Queſt. What is it that cheefly ſuſtaineth labour?

Anſw. Hope of reſt.

Quest. Who denie their owne requeſt?

Anſw. They that demand things impoſſible.

Queſt. Who is moſt like vnto a mad man?

Anſw. A drunkard.

Quest. What is that which woundeth the heart, and is worſhipped of the eie?

Anſw. Beautie?

Quest. How ought clemencie to bee moderated?

Anſw. So that it breedeth not our ouerthrow.

Quest. What is ſobrietie?

Anſw. The father of good counſell.

Quest. Wherein is a woman moſt conſtant?

Anſw. In her inconſtancie.

Queſt. Of what three things repented himſelfe Cato done in his life time?

Anſw. To haue ouerſlipt a day and not to haue encreaſed his knowledge, To haue gone by ſea, where hee might haue gone by land: and thirdly, To haue committed his ſecrets to a woman.

Queſt. Why ought wee not to diſcloſe our ſecrets vnto women?

Anſw. Becauſe they cannot keepe their owne.

Queſt. Why are there ſo many that liue diſcontented in wedlocke?

Anſw. Becauſe their firſt loue was grounded vpon luſt, or els in making of their raſh choice they had more regard to the womans dowry then to her conditions, or els the woman reſpected more the mans purſe then his perſonage, or more his body then his good or ill qualities.

Quest. Why was Diogenes called a dog?

Anſw. Becauſe hee did bite indifferently both his foes & his friends, but his friends to their good and amendment, and his enemies to their ſhame and confuſion.

Queſt. What men are very daungerous in a Commonwealth?

Anſw. Thoſe that affect nouelties?

Queſt. What three things are the life and death of life?

Anſw. Bathes, wine and women, for as the vſe of them is reſtitution, ſo is the abuſe of them life and healths deſtruction.

Queſt. What is ſtronger then death?

Anſw. Fame and renowne, and therefore a certaine Philoſopher did call fame the daughter of immortalitie.

Queſt. What is the reaſon that Wine mingled with water prouoketh vomit?

Anſw. Becauſe watered Wine hurts the ſtomacke, and weakeneth the retayning vertue or ſtrength of the Wine, whereas pure Wine doth ſtrengthen and comfort it.

Queſt. Why doe old folkes neeſe with great difficulty?

Anſw. Becauſe of the weakeneſſe of their nature, and the narrowneſſe of their paſſages.

Quest. Why is man more ſubiect to diſeaſes and infirmities then any other creature?

Anſw. By reaſon of his intemperancie, and therefore Schola Salerni ſayth, Eſſe cupis ſanus, ſit tibi parca manus. That is, if thou wilt liue in health, haue a niggerly hand, Ideſt. Vſe temperance of diet.

Quest. Why doe Phiſitions ſay that it is dangerous to let a fat man blood?

Anſw. Becauſe thoſe that are fat haue leſſer veines, and are more hidden and appeare not ſo much, moreouer they haue but little blood.

Quest. What is the reaſon that the Camelian chaungeth ſo oftentimes his colour?

Anſw. By reaſon of his great feare, and becauſe hee maketh much of his blood.

Queſt. Why doe men vſe to lay lime at the foot of a Cherrietree?

Anſw. To haue ripe Cherries before their ſeaſon.

Queſt. What man is worthely called bold and couragious?

Anſw. Hee that loues his life, and yet fears not death.

Queſt. What is the reaſon that ſome die for very ioy, and ſome by too much ſadneſſe?

Anſw. Great ioy doth coole too much the inward and vitall parts of the bodie, and ſorrow and ſadneſſe doth euē choke them.

Queſt. Why hath nature made the lungs of all creatures ſpongious, or full of holes, like vnto a ſpunge?

Anſw. To the end it might receiue the aire the better to coole the heart, and driue away from it all ſuch vapors as are hurtfull vnto it.

Queſt. Why is our heart placed in the middeſt of the bodie?

Anſw. To quicken equally all the members thereof, euen as the ſun giueth light equally to all things being in the middeſt of the heauens.

Queſt. Why were Iudges in times paſt painted without hands?

Anſw. To ſignifie thereby that Iuſtice ought not to be corrupted with bribes.

Queſt. What is a ſigne of a good Iudge?

Anſw. If hee departeth from his office with more gaine of good fame then riches.

Queſt. In what ſort ſhould a man ſeek profite of the Commonwealth?

Anſw. As at a fire, which if one ſitteth too neere vnto, doth ſcorch himſelfe, and being too farre off it, ſuſtayneth cold.

Quest. What thing maketh a good Souldiour?

Anſw. Diſcipline.

Queſt. What cauſeth deſpaire in a ſouldiour?

Anſw. Beggery.

Queſt. What is the cheefeſt ſtratagem in warre?

Anſw. Ripe deliberation, and preſent execution.

Queſt. What is the cheefeſt pollicie in peace?

Anſw. To feare ciuill diſcord and to preuent it, and by foreſight to reſiſt forraine inuaſion.

Quest. Who are onely to be called reſolute ſouldiours?

Anſw. Thoſe that are determined either to die, or els to obtaine the victory.

Queſt. What is a cheefe fault in warre?

Anſw. Feare of death.

Quest. How did antiquitie repreſent vnto vs the iſſue of good things?

Anſw. They made an image holding in the right hand a cup, and in the left hand an eare of corne with a ſprig of Poppy, ſignifying therby that he eaſily is brought aſleepe, that is contented with the fruits of the earth.

Queſt. What ſeruice is moſt in requeſt, and being performed, is leaſt conſidered and moſt hated?

Anſw. Treaſon.

Queſt. What time is moſt deſired, and obtained is moſt accuſed?

Anſw. Age.

Quest. What men are cheeflie deceiued?

Anſw. Thoſe that looke for two contrarie thinges at one time, namelie for pleaſure and the reward of vertue.

Quest. What is that in the morning goeth vpon foure legges, at noone vpon two, and in the euening vpon three legges?

Anſw. Man, for in his infancie hee creepeth vpon hands and feet, in his youth hee goeth ſtraight without any helpe or ſtay, and in his age vſeth beſides his legges the aid of a ſtaffe to ſupport his body.

Quest. What thing is in the day time as round as a hoope, and at night long as a

Anſw. A girdle about a man or womans body.

Queſt. How many waies is violence cheefly committed?

Anſw. Two waies, either by deceit or by force: the one is the practiſe of the Foxe, and the other of the Lyon, and both of them are moſt farre from humanitie.

Quest. Why is vertue had in ſo ſmall account?

Anſw. Becauſe ſhee is plaine and cannot diſſemble.

Queſt. Why dooth vertue reiect all gloſings?

Anſw. Becauſe truth needes no ſhaddowes?

Queſt. What men are moſt ingratefull to themſelues, and leaſt hurtfull to other men.

Anſw. Thoſe that are couetous and enuious, for as theſe pine away at other mens welfare and proſperitie, ſo the other endanger their ſoules to leaue rich, & perhaps vnthankfull heires behind them.

Quest. Why is heauen ſaid to haue a low gate?

Anſw. Becauſe thoſe that ſhall enter into it muſt firſt ſtoope low and learne humilitie.

Queſt. Why did Antiquitie in their churches place a croſſe vpon the entrance of the quire?

Anſw. Becauſe the body of the church did repreſent the church militant vpon earth, and the quire the church triumphant in heauen, to teach vs hereby that no man would come from the one into the other vnleſſe hee did ſuffer firſt croſſes and perſecutions?

Quest. What is a friend?

Anſw. Another ſelfeſame.

Queſt. What is commonly the end of a diſſolute life?

Anſw. A deſperate death.

Quest. What is a cheefe ſigne of a Princes clemencie, and a token of his great courage and magnanimitie?

Anſw. To deſpiſe the whiſperings of vnthankfull men, and patiently to ſuffer the rage of enuy.

Queſt. Which are the cheefeſt ornaments of women?

Anſw. Shamefaſtneſſe.

Quest. How might a foole reſemble a wiſe man?

Anſw. In hiding of his folly by ſilence.

Quest. What three things doe men moſt couet?

Anſw. Riches, Pleaſure, and Honor. Riches bee the nurſes of ſinne and iniquity. Pleaſures the guides to calamitie. And Honor the pompe of worldly vanities.

Quest. Why are pleaſures ſo much to bee abandoned?

Anſw. Becauſe their firſt entring is counterfeit and deceitfull, and their departure is griefe and repentance.

Queſt. What thing in this world is alwaies without reſt?

Anſw. A guilty conſcience.

Queſt. What is it that men moſt doe hunt after, and oftentimes prooueth moſt deceitfull?

Anſw. Womens fauor.

Quest. What is it that women moſt feare, & yet of it do moſt deſire the occaſion?

Anſw. To be with child they moſt deſire, and fear moſt the hour of their deliuery.

Queſt. What doe children moſt hate, and yet is moſt profitable vnto them?

Anſw. Correction.

Quest. What is leſſer then a Mouſe, and hath more windowes then a houſe?

Anſw. A Thymble.

Quest. What vice is moſt likeſt to the apples of Tantalus?

Anſw. Hypocriſie, For as the Apples of Tantalus ſeemed in ſight moſt beautiful, and yet prooued but ſhadowes: ſo this vice although it beareth a glorious ſhew of perfectiō, yet is nothing els but a meer and a deceitfull illuſion.

Queſt. Why is it amongſt men now adaies ſo much practiſed?

Anſw. Becauſe it is the higheſt degree of diſſembling, and therefore is accounted a ſure ſtep to promotion.

Quest. What men transforme themſelues into angels of light, and are nothing but Diuels incarnate?

Anſw. Hypocrites.

Queſt. What men promiſe thēſelues many vaine things?

Anſw. Courtiers, and ſuch as liue in continuall hope.

Queſt. What thing in the latter minute of his age waxeth yong againe?

Anſw. The Moone.

Queſt. Who is the mother of all mankind?

Anſw. The earth, euen by the Oracle of Apollo: for this Oracle being demanded by certaine Princes that were in controuerſie for the kindome of Aegypt, who ſhould ſucceed the late King deceaſed; anſwered, that he ſhould not only be inſtalled King of the kingdome of Aegypt, that firſt ſhould kiſſe his mother, but ſhould likewiſe become monarch of all Aſia. This anſwer being reported by the Prieſt vnto the Princes that were then attending without vpō the Oracle; Darius hauing heard it, ſtept ſuddainly from his horſe and kiſt the ground, ſaying that the earth was the mother of al mankind. The princes that could not deny it made and created him King, who afterward conquered all Aſia, and became quiet monarch of many kingdomes.

Queſt. What is it that taketh leaſt pleaſure in company?

Anſw. Pride, for it hateth his betters, enuieth his equals, and deſpiſeth his inferiors.

Queſt. What is it that being aliue is altogether dumbe, and being dead, yeeldeth a moſt ſweet harmonie?

Anſw. A Lute, or any kind of inſtrument made of wood.

Queſt. Which is the beſt remedy for things that are not to be recouered?

Anſw. Obliuion or forgetfulneſſe.

Quest. What is chiefly to be commended in a warrior?

Anſw. To be in fight terrible, and in conqueſt mild.

Quest. What ſurfeit is moſt dangerous and leaſt auoided?

Anſw. The ſurfeit of ſinne.

Quest. Who kill their mother ere they be borne, in the reuenge of their father that begot them?

Anſw. Vipers, for as the male and femall ingender by the mouth, ſo the damme being kindled with luſt in the art of Venery, bites of the males head, and the yong ones ere they be borne gnaw their mothers belly open to come forth, and ſo doe kill her.

Queſt. What is it that ſooneſt waxeth old?

Anſw. A benefite, for nothing is ſooner forgotten then a good turne, and nothing longer remembred then an iniury.

Queſt. What are Vſurers?

Anſw. The Horſeleeches and Caterpillers of the Commonwealth.

Quest. What is the leaſt and yet the profitableſt thing in a Garden?

Anſw. A Bee.

Quest. What wind bloweth no way to profite, and is noyſome to all the neighbours?

Anſw. The foiſting of a dogge, the ſmell whereof is noyſome to all the companie that are neere it.

Queſt. Vpon what men are almes deedes worſt beſtowed?

Anſw. Vpon blind men, for they would be glad to ſee him hanged that releeues them. I would not that any man ſhould interprete them in earneſt, which is only written in a merriment, and that for this they ſhould withdraw their charity from ſuch poore men.

Queſt. Why do moſt men delight more in fleſh then in fiſh, & why it is more wholſomer vnto the body?

Anſw. Becauſe it ſtrengthneth more and is of ſounder nouriſhment, or els becauſe it agrees better with the ſubſtance of our bodies.

Queſt. What is the Law?

Anſw. A net.

Quest. What are the Lawyers?

Anſw. Burdars.

Queſt. What are the Clients?

Anſw. Birds.

Queſt. What is the Court where the Law is pleaded.

Anſw. The place where the nets are ſpred to take the ſimple and ſilly birds.

Quest. Whereby doth a womans loue reſemble the ſhadow of our bodies?

Anſw. Euen as our ſhadow if we runne towards it doth fleet away from vs, and if wee runne from it doth follow vs: ſo the loue of a woman, if wee fondly purſue it, will diſdaine vs, but if we ſet light by it or ſeeme to run from it, will moſt earneſtly deſire vs.

Queſt. What is a chief ſtratageme in war?

Anſw. Expedition, and not to ouerſlip occaſion.

Queſt. Why did the Ancients find fault with Zeuxis liberalitie?

Anſw. Becauſe he gaue & beſtowed gifts to receiue double againe.

Quest. What is the cauſe of greateſt deuotion & the greateſt repleniſher of hel?

Anſw. Ignorance, which maketh men to worſhip ſtones and diſhonour God.

Quest. What is the greateſt friend to men at libertie, and the moſt enemy to ſuch as are condemned?

Anſw. Hope, which encourageth men at libertie to attempt great matters, & maketh ſuch as are condemned vnprepared for death.

Queſt. What ſeaſoneth and ſweetneth the bitterneſſe of warre.

Anſw. Hope of victorie.

Quest. Why is fauour bought with mony, moſt vncertaine?

Anſw. Becauſe by diſcontinuance of giuing it breeds inward grudging, and by the ceaſing of liberalitie, it burſteth out into open hatred.

Quest. Wherein is an enuious man like vnto yron?

Anſw. Euen as yron is conſumed with his owne ruſt, ſo an enuious man pines away by his owne folly.

Queſt. What is leaſt to bee reſpected in an Oration?

Anſw. Gloſing words, for as in coyne the brauery of the ſtampe is little or nothing regarded but onely the weight and the ſubſtance: euen ſo it is no matter how eloquent the Oration be, but how graue and profitable.

Queſt. What is an Hyſtory?

Anſw. A teſtimony of time, a light of veritie, the maintainance of memory, the ſchoole-miſtreſſe of life, and the meſſenger of antiquity.

Queſt. What is the hardeſt thing to bee learned?

Anſw. To learne to know himſelfe.

Quest. How might one eſchew enuy?

Anſw. By liuing abiect and miſerable.

Queſt. What is Idleneſſe?

Anſw. The Father of Lechery, and the highway to pouertie.

Queſt. What are riches?

Anſw. Diogenes called them the vomite of fortune.

Queſt. What doth caſt from it a greater heat then fire?

Anſw. Beautie, which ſetteth not only on fire thoſe that touch it, but alſo thoſe that a farre off doe behold it.

Queſt. What is death?

Anſw. The end of trauels, and the beginning of life.

Quest. What is the duty of a wiſe man?

Anſw. To miſtruſt the ignorant, and to know how to skirmiſh with aduerſitie.

Queſt. Who is ſometimes a mother and ſometimes a ſtepdame?

Anſw. Fortune.

Quest. What are the moſt precious ornaments of a Citie?

Anſw. The vertues of the Cittizens.

Queſt. What maketh men conſtant againſt all humane affections?

Anſw. A good diſpoſition of the mind.

Queſt. Why are lawes ſaid to be like vnto ſpiders webs?

Anſw. Becauſe they catch ſmall flies, but waſpes and bees flie through them.

Quest. What is the reaſon that for to ſee the better we are wont to ſhut one eie?

Anſw. Becauſe the other might bee aided with the ſence of the eie which is ſhut and cloſed.

Queſt. What is the cauſe of Hydropſie?

Anſw. The great cold of the liuer.

Queſt. Why do thoſe that haue the yellow yandars find hony to be bitter in taſt?

Anſw. By reaſon of the great colour wherwith their tongue and the palait of their mouth is infected:

Queſt. Why do muske, millions, & cucumbers, prouoke vrine?

Anſw. By reaſon of their great humiditie.

Queſt. What is the cauſe that old men and women dote?

Anſw. By reaſon of the great coldneſſe which is in them.

Queſt. Wherout doth it proceed that men become pale when they are ſeaſed with feare?

Anſw. Becauſe the blood retires to the vitall parts of the body.

Quest. Why hath a Scorpion his poyſon in the taile?

Anſw. Becauſe the poyſon is his excrement.

Queſt. Why did Hypocrates permit thoſe to drinke wine that had a burning ague?

Anſw. It was for to helpe digeſtion, and to ſtrengthen the parties.

Queſt. Why are the extremities of the body more ſubiect to cold then the other parts thereof?

Anſw. Becauſe they are not ſo ſolide or ſo well knit together, and are farther remoued from the heart.

Queſt. Why do Pullets (their throtes being cut) ſuruiue after it longer then men?

Anſw. Chickens and Pullets haue ſmaller ſinnewes and veines, and therefore life cannot ſo ſoone leaue them.

Quest. Why are men more taller then women?

Anſw. By reaſon of their naturall heat.

Queſt. Why doe women make water ſtooping, and men to the contrary?

Anſw. Becauſe their bladder ſtands higher then mens doth.

Queſt. Why haue men more teeth thē women?

Anſw. Becauſe they abound more in blood and heat.

Queſt. What is the reaſon that when maidens breſts begin to grow, they begin to change their voice?

Anſw. Becauſe then the Organs of the voice are wider and leſſer cloſed.

Queſt. Why are twinnes not ſo ſtrong as others be?

Anſw. Becauſe the ſeed which ſhold haue ſerued to one, is parted into two.

Queſt. Why doe eager things prouoke appetite?

Anſw. Becauſe they drie vp the humours, and conſequently cloſe the ſtomacke faſter vp, which doth cauſe appetite.

Quest. Why doe Lettuce prouoke ſleepe?

Anſw. Becauſe they engender groſſe humors?

Queſt. Why is Iuie alwaies greene?

Anſw. Becauſe the heat of it is tempered with humiditie and viſcoſitie.

Queſt. Why haue Birds no teeth?

Anſw. Becauſe the ſubſtance which teeth doe grow of, doth turne into their bils.

Queſt. When is vice paſt al hope of remedy?

Anſw. When it is growne into a cuſtome.

Queſt. Why doe matters well executed, pleaſe but few men?

Anſw. Becauſe moſt men are rather guided by affection then by reaſon.

Queſt. What is idleneſſe?

Anſw. A nurſe of laſciuiouſneſſe and the wel-ſpring of all vices.

Queſt. What thing metamorphoſeth a man into a beaſt?

Anſw. Luſt.

Queſt. Which is the higheſt degree of vncharitie?

Anſw. To make of him a laughing ſtocke beſides, who by our means hath been afflicted.

Queſt. Which is the chiefeſt felicitie?

Anſw. To be releaſed of a wicked woman.

Queſt. What men are leaſt to be truſted?

Anſw. Thoſe that haue beene diſloiall to their owne country.

Queſt. What thing ſpends moſt prodigally that which couetouſneſſe hath moſt wickedly ſcraped together?

Anſw. Ambition.

Queſt. What is a chiefe comfort to the conquered, or to thoſe that are ouercome?

Anſw. Hope of reuenge.

Queſt. What is the life of Courtiers?

Anſw. A continuall hope.

Queſt. By what honeſt meanes may poore men encreaſe their ſtocke?

Anſw. By ſparing.

Queſt. Why did the Lacedemonians ſacrifice a Cock when they had obtained victory againſt their enemies by maine force: and an Oxe when they had ouerthrowne them by ſubtletie, ſurpriſe, orintelligence?

Anſw. Becauſe they preferred Prudence and wit before force or bodily ſtrength, and therefore a certaine captain of Grecia was wont to ſay, If a lions skin cannot preuaile, adde vnto it the skin of a foxe, meaning thereby; if force cannot, vſe policy.

Queſt. Which are the fruits of pleaſure?

Anſw. Griefe and repentance.

Queſt. Which is the firſt ſtep to aduerſitie?

Anſw. The higheſt degree of proſperitie.

Queſt. Why doth men neeſe ſooner being in the ſunne then being neere the fire?

Anſw. Becauſe the heat of the ſun doth only diſſolue the humor, and conſumes it not: but the fire doth both diſſolue and conſume it.

Queſt. Why doe the eies of Cats & wolfes ſhine in the night and not by day?

Anſw. Becauſe the greater light doth darken the leſſer.

Queſt. Why is the white of an Egge of ſo hard a digeſtion?

Anſw. By reaſon of the great coldnes of it.

Quest. Why doth Burrage laid in wine reioice thoſe that doe eat it?

Anſw. Becauſe it doth encreaſe blood, and ſtrengthneth the heart.

Queſt. Why did Nature make rather the braine cold then whote?

Anſw. To temper and moderate the heat of the heart, to the end it might ſerue it in ſtead of a cooler.

Queſt. What paſsion is that which tormenteth a man moſt and hath leaſt power to ouercome?

Anſw. A womans inconſtancy, which greeueth a man, and cannot be ouercome by women themſelues.

Queſt. How ought wee to vſe proſperitie?

Anſw. Not to truſt vnto it, for we ought to vſe the gifts of fortune for our neceſsitie, and not to relie vpon them.

Queſt. What is pleaſure?

Anſw. A bait to take men as hookes and nets doe fiſhes.

Quest. What poyſon ought Princes to auoid chiefly?

Anſw. The poyſon of flattery.

Que. What is the reaſon that the bottome of a Kettell being full of boiling water & hanging ouer the fire, is cold notwithſtanding?

Anſw. By reaſon of the hote vapors which continually doe mount vpwards, wherewith the higher parts being warmed, the bottome remains coole for the continuance of the water that is vpon it.

Queſt. Why do thoſe that oftentimes weep piſſe ſeldome?

Anſw. Becauſe the humiditie taking his paſſage by the eies dooth eaſe ſo much the more the other parts and members of the body.

Queſt. Why did Nature ordaine neeſing?

Anſw. To purge the ſuperfluities of the braine, like as the lunges are purged with coffing.

Quest. What maketh pleaſures moſt ſauerous?

Anſw. A rare and ſeldome vſe of them.

Queſt. What is it that conſumes his mother that bare him, eates his nurſe that feedes him, and then dies, leauing all them blind that ſaw him?

Anſw. The flambe of a Candle.

Quest. What men if cauſe do moue them, doe ſooneſt forſweare themſelues?

Anſw. Thoſe that are woont lightly to ſweare without a cauſe.

Queſt. Which is the only phiſick in miſery?

Anſw. Patience.

Queſt. Whereby doth a man pleaſe a woman beſt, and yet diſpleaſe himſelf moſt.

Anſw. In giuing her her will.

Quest. What is beſt to bee done for a rich man falling ſicke?

Anſw. Not to make his Phiſition his heire.

Queſt. What is Loue?

Anſw. An idle bodies paſtime or buſineſſe.

Queſt. How might one auoid loue?

Anſw. By eſchewing idleneſſe.

Quest. How ought we to vſe loue?

Anſw. As a foole to ſport, or a minſtrell to make vs merry.

Quest. Who are the beſt creatures vpon earth.

Anſw. Women next vnto men and Bees.

Queſt. Who is rich?

Anſw. He that is contented.

Queſt. How might one learn to be content?

Anſw. To vnlearne to couet.

Queſt. What men doe leaſt feare death?

Anſw. Thoſe that feele leaſt comfort in this world.

Queſt. What ought we chiefly to learne in proſperitie?

Anſw. How wee might beſt indure aduerſitie.

Quest. Wherein is the life of man like vnto yron?

Anſw. Euen as yron if it be vſed doth wear away, and if it be not vſed doth conſume with ruſt: ſo our life if it be neuer ſo well exerciſed dooth decreaſe by time, if not, yet doth it waſt away with idleneſſe.

Quest. What is the immoderate vſe of too much liberty?

Anſw. An occaſion oftentimes of bondage and ſlauery.

Quest. What men are moſt vnthankfull?

Anſw. Thoſe that can tell how to receiue a benefit, and not how to requite it, or els thoſe that deny the receit of it, but chiefly thoſe that haue forgotten it.

Qu. What ſhadow is moſt deceitfull?

Anſ. Hypocriſie.

Qu. Which is the chiefeſt reuenue for one that hath no lands?

Anſ. Sparing.

Qu. When is clemency moſt hurtfull?

Anſ. When rebels are moſt obſtinate.

Qu. What thing is moſt dangerous, leaſt auoided, and moſt deſired?

Anſ. The pleaſures of this world.

Qu. What ſoile beares both the beſt and the worſt fruit?

Anſ. The wombe of a woman.

Qu. What ought a ſeruant chiefly to practiſe to obtaine his maiſters fauor?

Anſ. Diligence, continuance, and ſecreſie.

Qu. Where is ſilence moſt to be practiſed?

Anſ. In matters of ſecreſie, and amongſt pots and Cannes.

Qu. How or what are the gifts of fortune?

Anſ. Such as are the mindes of thoſe that poſſeſſe them, a help & comfort to them that can vſe them, and a ruine and ouerthrow to them that know not how to vſe them.

Qu. What men are moſt vnfortunate in aduerſity?

Anſ. Thoſe that neuer learned to be croſt in proſperity.

Qu. What feedes a doubtfull life, or him that is by law condemned to die?

Anſ. Hope of pardon.

Qu. Why were it better to bee among Rauens, then to liue among flatterers?

Anſ. Becauſe Rauens pray not vpon men but when they are dead, but flatterers deuour them euen when they are aliue.

Qu. What bitings are moſt ſoreſt and moſt greeuous?

Anſ. The bitings of neceſsity.

Qu. What men ought chiefly to bee without faults?

Anſ. Thoſe that are alwaies moſt ready to eſpie faults in others.

Qu. What is it to lend money vpon vſury?

Anſ. To kill a man.

Qu. Why did Solon eſtabliſh no law againſt Paricides?

Anſ. Becauſe hee thought that ſuch an enormity could not bee committed by a child, and therefore (becauſe hee ſhould not ſeeme rather to remember men of ſuch a wickedneſſe then to forbid it) would in no wiſe appoint any puniſhment for it.

Qu. What maintaines a Commonwealth?

Anſ. Reward and puniſhment.

Qu. How ſhould parents take the death of their children?

Anſ. As Anaxagoras and a lady of Lacena did: for newes being brought to the one, of his ſonnes departure out of this life: anſwered the meſſengers, That he knew long ſince that hee had begotten a mortal man. And this lady whoſe conſtancie deſerueth no leſſe praiſe & commendation, hauing heard that her ſon was ſlaine in the battaile, ſaid to thoſe that firſt brought her the tidings hereof: To that end haue I brought him to the world, that there ſhould not bee wanting one that ſhould doubt and refuſe to ſpend his life and blood in the defence of his countrey.

Qu. Wherein did Cyreneus and Theodorus courage and magnanimity moſt chieflie ſhine and appeare?

Anſ. In his reſolute anſwer to king Lyſimachus when hee did threaten him with death, for then boldly ſpeaking to the Tyrant, Bid him to feare his Courtiers with theſe bugs, for Theodorus is indifferent (quoth he) whether he rots vnder or aboue the ground.

Qu. Who may be ſaid to ſuffer water continually to bee drawne out of his ſpring, and yet for it hath nothing the leſſe himſelfe?

Anſ. He that giueth good counſel to them that demand it, or hee that beſtoweth a benefite vpon another without any hinderance to himſelfe.

Qu. Which may be called a double iniury?

Anſ. To be defrauded of deſerued praiſes, and purſued with vndeſerued reproches.

Qu. By what meanes ſhal one become rich quickly?

Anſ. In being poore of deſire: and therefore Seneca ſaid, If you haue reſpect wherwith nature is ſufficed you ſhall neuer be poore, but if you looke vnto that which opinion craueth you ſhall neuer be rich.

Qu. What men may be ſaid to liue onely and longeſt?

Anſ. Thoſe that liue onely and longeſt in eaſe and quiet: And therefore Adrian a moſt puiſſant Emperour, who by great trauell and interceſsion obtained licenſe in the end of his daies to dwell in a little village of his, where he liued ſeuē yeares in great reſt and quiet, dying, left an aparant token and teſtimony, that the life led in honor and dignity was not the true life, for he cauſed words to be graued on his tombe, Here lieth the wight whoſe age is of many yeares, but hee liued but only ſeuen.

Qu. What child is the only heire of a wiſe and worthy Parent?

Anſ. Hee that inheriteth and is heire vnto all his fathers vertues.

Qu. What is marriage.

Anſ. A Paradiſe on earth if her lawes bee obſerued, but a hell in the houſe if her ſtatutes be broken.

Qu. How many chiefe powers are there of the ſoule?

Anſ. Three, Intendment, Will, and Memory.

Qu. What three deſerts of the body ſtop the paſſage of theſe three powers of the ſoule?

Anſ. Ignorance of that which is good, Couetouſneſſe of that which is euill, Infirmity and langor of the body.

Qu. What are the remedies againſt theſe three euils and defects?

Anſ. Wiſdome, Vertue, & Neceſsity; which to chaſe theſe three euils are thus ordered: Wiſdome againſt ignorance: Vertue againſt couetouſneſſe & vice: Neceſsity againſt infirmity.

Qu. What is it that of men is leaſt eſteemed, and of God moſt honoured?

Anſ. Chaſtity, which is precious before God, and a laughing ſtocke before men.

Qu. What is ignorance?

Anſ. A graue which burieth life.

Qu. What foure things haue continuall reſidence in a Noble mind?

Anſ. Courage to repell the incroching enemy: a heart to conſider a loyall friend: a hand to reward the gifts of the ſimple: and clemency to accept & pardon a well meaning mind.

Qu. How many kinds of Sages be there?

Anſ. Three. The ſage wiſe man, the ſage foole, and the ſage hearbe.

Qu. Wherin is a flatterer like vnto a hauke?

Anſ. Becauſe as a Hauke will not come to an empty fiſt, ſo a flatterer to an emptie purſe.

Qu. Which is the firſt ſtep of loue?

Anſ. The loſſe of libertie.

Qu. Who after their death, liue in the life of their children?

Anſ. Such parents as haue brought vp their children, as they may chuſe the good and forſake the euill.

Qu. Who is alone a worthy and a valiant man?

Anſ. He who neuer dooth bow his ſhoulders at the burden of misfortunes, nor he who neuer panted at his chance.

Qu. What anſwered Gorgias being demanded, what manner of diet he vſed that he liued ſo long?

Anſ. That hee neuer did eat any thing for pleaſure or wantonneſſe.

Qu. Why did Zenocrates (aſsigning all the parts of the day to ſome buſines) appoint likewiſe to ſilence his due part?

Anſ. Becauſe he might then priuately diſcuſſe with himſelf what maner he ought to keepe in ſpeaking.

Qu. What did neuer ſpeak wel of any man?

Anſ. Euill will.

Qu. Wherein did Artemiſia declare her great chaſtitie towards her husband deceaſed?

Anſ. In her entire loue towards him, for when her husband Manſolus King of Caria was dead, ſhee cauſed his heart to bee dried in a veſſell of gold into pouder, and by a little and little drank it all vp ſaying, Their two hearts ſhould neuer depart aſunder: & that ſhe thought there might be no worthier ſepulchre made for it but her owne body. Notwithſtanding ſhee made for his body ſuch a ſepulchre, that for the excellent workemanſhip, beautie and coſtlineſſe therof, it was taken for one of the meruailes of the world: & for the notable fame of it, all ſumptuous and great ſepulchres were afterwards called Manſalca.

Qu. Which is the beſt hauen to him that is penitent?

Anſ. Confeſsion of his faults, and change of counſell.

Qu. How might a man become maiſter ouer himſelfe?

Anſ. In amending that in himſelfe which he rebuketh in another body.

Qu. Wherefore made nature man naked & without weapons to defend himſelfe?

Anſ. Nature hauing beſtowed wiſedome vpon man, hath giuen him means inough to arme himſelfe at his owne pleaſure, as well againſt the cold and heat of the air, as againſt the blowes of his enemy.

Qu. Why are Iudges and Lawyers more honoured of thoſe that goe to law, then Phiſitions are of their patients?

Anſ. Becauſe the gaine of the cauſe doth depend of the Iudge and aduocates: but giuing of health to the patient lieth not in the hands of the Phiſition, but in God only.

Qu. Why doth a Swanne being neere his death ſing more ſweeter then at any other time?

Anſ. Nature hath taught this to the bird, to teach vs the good which wee receiue by death, which ſerueth vs for a doom or paſſage to euerlaſting life.

Qu. Why do men ſeeke to auoid pouerty?

Anſ. Becauſe it cauſeth them oftentimes to decline from the right way of vertue.

Qu. Why doe men drinke water, which notwithſtanding doth not nouriſh?

Anſ. Water dooth ſpend the digeſtion of the meat through all parts of the body.

Qu. Why are thoſe that are drunke, cold?

Anſ. By reaſon of the Wine taken immoderately, which quencheth and ouerwhelmeth the natural heat of the body.

Queſt. Why doe Phiſitions not miniſter medicines when the ſickneſſe or diſeaſe is at the cheefeſt?

Anſ. Becauſe they ſhould not oppreſſe or hinder nature.

Qu. What is the cauſe that children who are moiſt by nature are not bald notwithſtanding?

Anſ. Becauſe their humidity is intermingled with a temperate heat.

Qu. Why doth Rue being planted vnder a figge tree grow the better, and receiueth more nouriſhment?

Anſ. Becauſe it draws vnto itſelf the ſweetnes of the figge tree, or els the figge tree ſuckes away from the Rue a part of his bitterneſſe, and ſo being ſomwhat ſweetned it groweth the better.

Qu. What is the reaſon why teeth do come againe, and not any other bones of the body?

Anſ. All other bones are made and ingendred of a naturall humor and moiſtneſſe in the mothers wombe: but the teeth are ingendred by a nouriſhing humor, which daily doth increaſe.

Qu. What is the reaſon that when wee ſee others to yawne, we are prouoked to doe the like?

Anſ. This proceedeth to my iudgement by the vertue of our imagination.

Qu. What did moue nature to giue vs ears?

Anſ. Becauſe thereby men might iudge of the difference of ſounds and voices. Through the ears likewiſe is purged the colour which is in the braines, as through the noſe is the flegme.

Qu. Of what ſtuffe are womens tongues made of?

Anſ. Of an aſpen leafe, for they neuer leaue wagging.

Qu. What is moſt praiſed and leaſt practiſed?

Anſ. Honeſty, or els the vertue of liberalitie.

Qu. Which is the firſt ſtep to wiſdome?

Anſ. To know himſelfe, and the ſecond to feare God.

Qu. What is the Magiſtrate?

Anſ. The mouth of the Law.

Qu. What is honor?

Anſ. The reward of vertue.

Qu. What is the property of folly?

Anſ. To ſee other mens faults and to forget her owne.

Qu. Which is the only ſauce of meat?

Anſ. Hunger, as thirſt is of drinke.

Qu. What is ſhamefaſtneſſe?

Anſ. The tincture and die of vertue.

Qu. Which is the cheefeſt pleaſure in this world?

Anſ. Libertie.

Qu. In contracting of marriage what ought firſt to be regarded?

Anſ. Vertue and not riches: and therefore Themiſtocles a woorthy Duke of Grecia being asked why hee had rather to beſtow his daughter vpon a poor and an honeſt man, then vpon a rich man ill conditioned: I (ſaid he) had rather a man without money, then money wanting a man.

Qu. How might one beſt learn to diſcerne a knaue?

Anſ. In comparing him by an honeſt man.

Qu. What ought a wiſe man to practiſe?

Anſ. How to accomodate himſelfe to the time.

Qu. What is a chiefe cauſe of our owne ouerthrow?

Anſ. Selfeloue.

Qu. Whom chiefely hurteth pouertie?

Anſ. Him that cannot carry it patiently.

Qu. Which is the ſauce of labor?

Anſ. Reſt.

Qu. Who liues moſt ſafely?

Anſ. Hee that doth not diſcouer his owne ſecrets.

Qu. What is the ſtate of a rich churle, or of a couetous man?

Anſ. A continuall torment, & by extream deſire of gaine, accompanied with a fear to looſe thar which he hath gotten.

Qu. What thing gets friends?

Anſ. Proſperity, but aduerſity tries them.

Qu. Why ought we in requiting of a good turne, imitate the earth?

Anſ. Becauſe it giues more then it receiueth.

Qu. Why ought we not to blame, nor likewiſe to praiſe our ſelues?

Anſ. Becauſe the one is a ſigne of folly, and the other a token of inconſtancy.

Qu. What are riches?

Anſ. Nets to intrap men, and thornes to pierce the heart.

Qu. Which is the ſureſt guard of a Prince?

Anſ. The loue of his ſubiects.

Qu. What two things do chiefly bridle and encourage men?

Anſ. Reward and puniſhment.

Qu. Why haue wiſe men alwaies hated anger?

Anſ. Becauſe it is a ſpice and kind of folly.

Qu. Wherein is warre better then peace?

Anſ. Warre ſtirreth vp the minds of men to vertue, and peace drawes them to idleneſſe and laſciuiouſneſſe.

Qu. Why doe old men die almoſt without paine?

Anſ. By reaſon that all their ſences are debilitated and weakened.

Qu. Why doth ſorrow and grief make men to looke old before their time?

Anſ. Becauſe they dry vp the moiſtneſſe of the body, and age is nothing but a kind of drineſſe.

Qu. Why muſt Wheaten bread chiefly be ſalted and leauened?

Anſ. Becauſe that Wheat by nature is ſopping and very, and ſalt doth dry the great of it, and the leauen makes it more lighter.

Qu. Why are fat things not ſubiect ſo ſoon to corruption?

Anſ. Becauſe they participate ſo much of the aire and the fire.

Qu. Why is a Diamond not ſo ſoon burned by thy fire as any other precious ſtone?

Anſ. By reaſon of his ſoliditie.

Qu. Why dooth oyle ſwim aboue any kind of liquor?

Anſ. Becauſe of his fatneſſe, and all fat things doe much participate of the ayre.

Qu. What is the reaſon that ſome men are more able to endure longer then other?

Anſ. Becauſe ſome of them are more cholericke and ſome more flegmaticke.

Qu. What is the reaſon that when wee are a hungred, our ſpitting is more ſalter then otherwiſe?

Anſ. Becauſe hunger encreaſeth choler, which eaſily becommeth bitter by reaſon of his ſharpeneſſe.

Qu. Why are women commonly more fatter then men?

Anſ. Becauſe they are more colder of cō plexion, and doe leſſe exerciſe.

Qu. What is the cauſe that the milk of pale or white women is not ſo wholeſome as that of them that are browne?

Anſ. Blacke women are more whoter of nature, and therfore by conſequent their milke is better digeſted.

Qu. Of what conditions is man?

Anſ. Of all conditions of foules & beaſts that God hath created. Bold as a lyon, ſportful as an ape, dumbe as a fiſh, prating as a parret, filthy as aſwine, neat as a ſwanne, ſwift as a hart, ſlow as a ſnaile, prowd as a peacocke, gentle as a lambe, chaſt as a turtle, loyall as a horſe, fearefull as a hare, ignorant as an aſſe, ſubtle as a ſerpent, angry as a waſpe, and lecherous as a Moonky.

Qu. Of what mettall are womens tongues made of?

Anſ. Of Virgils braſen flaile, which ſtrooke both friends and foes.

Qu. What difference is there betweene a ſcold and a harlot?

Anſ. As there is betweene the Viper and the Crockadile, for the ſcold with outrage deſtroieth her husband, & the harlot with diſſembling loue.

Qu. What is that which is coldeſt clad in freeſe, and warmeſt attired in precious ſtones?

Anſ. Pride, which hath no grace but in brauery.

Qu. What is life without literature?

Anſ. A mans graue, or an image of death.

Qu. What wicked mother hath brought forth a good child the onely prop & ſtay of all gouernements?

Anſ. Ill manners haue brought forth good lawes, to the eſtabliſhment of vertue, and the ſubuerſion of vice.

Qu. What ought we to thinke of the time which we haue here?

Anſ. That wee haue little ynough & looſe much.

Qu. Where ought marriage not to bee inforced?

Anſ. Where loue cannot be compelled.

Qu. Which are the titles and epithets of the ſunne?

Anſ. To be parent of the day, gouernor of the world, a quickner of the body, the eie of the firmament, the heart of nature, the king of the ſtarres, and the viſible ſonne of God.

Qu. Which are the wings of time?

Anſ. Time paſt, preſent, and to come.

Qu. Which are the teeth wherwith time conſumes all things?

Anſ. The night, the day, life and death.

Qu. What is the cauſe that in our age there are not ſo many excellent men, as there were in times paſt?

Anſ. By reaſon of nature which daily decreaſeth, or becauſe vertue is not ſo much eſteemed of now adaies as it was in times paſt, or els it is the cuſtome of all ages to complaine.

Qu. What is anger?

Anſ. A ſhort madneſſe, or els the beginning of fooliſhneſſe.

Qu. What is vertue?

Anſ. A ſweet harmony of nature, to the found and time wherof al good men giue an eare vnto.

Qu. What difference is there between wiſdome and a ready wit?

Anſ. The wiſe man giueth good counſell, and the witty man preſently conceiues and iudges of it.

Qu. What priuiledge haue braue and couragious knights aboue other men?

Anſ. Not to be ſubiect nor to be daunted by fortune.

Qu. What ſhadoweth nay darkeneth the great vertues in Philip, and Alexander the Great, his ſonne?

Anſ. Drunkenneſſe.

Qu. What is Wine immoderately taken?

Anſ. The blood of the earth turned to poyſon.

Qu. What is Wine moderately taken?

Anſ. A whetſtone to memory.

Qu. Why did the Aegyptians ordaine that commonieſters and plaiers ſhould beare no witneſſe in any cauſe?

Anſ. Becauſe ſuch kind of people are commonly giuen to wickedneſſe, and for a trifle ready to do a miſchiefe.

Qu. What is nobilitie without vertue?

Anſ. A bladder puft vp with pride and violence.

Qu. Which are the vertues that doe conduct vs to heauen?

Anſ. Faith, hope, charity, pietie, religion, and godlineſſe.

Qu. Which is the poyſon of friendſhip?

Anſ. Flattery.

Qu. What kind of ignorance is moſt dangerous?

Anſ. Not to know God, and then not to know himſelfe.

Qu. Wherefore is vertue ſo amiable?

Anſ. Becauſe ſhee is alwaies conformable to reaſon.

Qu. What warre is lawfull?

Anſ. That which is conducted to obtaine peace.

Qu. Wherefore is the firſt counſel of a woman which ſhe giueth without thinking on it, far better then that which ſhe hath ſtudied vpon?

Anſ. Euen as all vnreaſonable creatures are by inſtinct of nature driuen to their actions: ſo a woman although ſhe be ill, yet the intelligence which nature hath giuen her, which will not bee deceiued, nor abuſe any body, compels her by the firſt motion to good: But if ſhe gets leaſure to vſe her owne nature, all that ſhee ſhall doe will be naught.

Qu. Wherefore are women commonly more couetous then men?

Anſ. Becauſe they know they ſhould bee no body without riches.

Qu. Wherefore are thoſe that haue great heads more giuen to ſleepe then thoſe that haue little heads?

Anſ. The greater the thing is the more vapors it doth containe, and humiditie doth cauſe ſleepe.

Qu. Why are lentiles and cabages ſo ill for the eie ſight?

Anſ. By reaſon of the melancholike blood which they engender.

Qu. What is the cauſe that many die with too much ioy?

Anſ. Becauſe the vitall ſpirits abandon the heart.

Qu. Wherefore ought we not to faſt long?

Anſ. By reaſon that by too much faſting a maſſe of ill humours is ingendred, and prouoke vomit.

Qu. What is the cauſe that we haue better ſtomackes to our meate when the wind is at the North, then at other times?

Anſ. By reaſon of his coldnes which knits together and holds within vs the natural heat of our bodies.

Qu. What is the reaſon that Vineger is very wholeſome to thoſe that are cholericke, & is of contrary operation to thoſe that are melancholicke?

Anſ. Becauſe it aſſwageth choler by his coldneſſe, and dries vp melancholie.

Qu. What is the reaſon that in tract of time Wine becommeth more whote?

Anſ. Becauſe the aquoſity thereof euaporeth and vaniſheth away.

Qu. What is the cauſe that ſome wines ſower ſo lightly?

Anſ. Becauſe that in the time of Vintage the grape was full of ſuperfluous humors.

Qu. Why dooth the wild Bore vſe to piſſe before he runnes away?

Anſ. To vnlade him of the burden of his water for to runne the ſwifter.

Qu. When is it nothing diſcommendable to exceed the meane?

Anſ. When it is vſed to exerciſe and driue drowſineſſe out of ſluggards.

Qu. What husbāds do not loue their wiues?

Anſ. Thoſe that loue their bodies & their goods, and not their mindes and good conditions.

Qu. What is chiefly to bee regarded in a witneſſe?

Anſ. His honeſty, as in a Lawier eloquence and good vtterance.

Qu. Why can yoong men hardly keepe a meane?

Anſ. By reaſon of the natural heat abounding in them.

Qu. How might a foole ſeeme and bee accounted wiſe?

Anſ. If he goes braue in attire and ſpeakes little.

Qu. What is the reaſon that ſome haue hard and ſome haue ſoft heare?

Anſ. The greatneſſe and ſmalneſſe of the Pores is cauſe of it, for ſoft hear cōmeth by reaſon of the ſmalneſſe of them, and hard heare for the contrarie. And therefore women haue commonly ſofter hear thē men, becauſe their naturall cold doth reſtrain and cloſe the Pores.

Qu. What is the reaſon that Garlicke and Onyons doe bud although they are not in the earth?

Anſ. Becauſe of their great abundance of moiſtneſſe and heat.

Qu. Why is a dead body heauier then that which hath life within?

Anſ. A body aliue is full of ayre and fire which doe hold it vpright, for their nature is alwaies to mount vpwards, and a dead body is nothing but a lumpe of earth, whoſe nature is heauie and alwaies tending downewards.

Qu. What dooth preuent an occaſion of murmuring?

Anſ. Equalitie.

Qu. Why doe vices ſhaddow themſelues vnder the colour of vertues?

Anſ. Becauſe if they ſhould come in their own ſhape, but few would giue them entertainement.

Qu. Why ought Parents to bee very curious in ſeeking of good tutors and maſters for to inſtruct their children?

Anſ. Becauſe as their Parents are the fathers of their bodies, ſo the maiſters are the fathers of their ſoules: and as childrē doe imitate the nature of thoſe that haue begotten them; ſo out of their maiſters maners as out of a nurſes breſt, they ſucke their vertues and vices, their good and ill conditions.

Qu. What is it that in louing too much turneth to mortall hatred?

Anſ. Ielouſie.

Qu. Who murdereth the liuing & the ſame of the dead?

Anſ. A Slanderer.

Qu. Wherin is our enemy commonly better vnto vs then our friend?

Anſ. Becauſe our enemy ſpeares not to tel vs our faults, which friends ſeeke for the moſt part to hide from vs.

Qu. What is as ſeldome found as the Phenix of Arabia?

Anſ. A truſty friend.

Qu. What is it that Kings cannot conquer?

Anſ. Mens affections.

Qu. In what place is flattery a Iewell?

Anſ. Where diſſembling ſwaies the ſcepter.

Qu. What ought wee in this life moſt to remember, and leaſt to feare?

Anſ. The houre of death.

Qu. What is mans life?

Anſ. A thing more brickell then glaſſe, more lighter then the ſmoke, and ſwifter then the wind.

Qu. What garment is the beſt?

Anſ. That which couers malice.

Qu. What are dice?

Anſ. Fortunes whelpes, which conſume a mans wealth, and empaire his patience.

Qu. What are womens vowes?

Anſ. Words written in the wind.

Qu. What are their promiſſes?

Anſ. Carracters figured in the ayre, and figures grauen in the ſnow.

Qu. What is a beautifull ſtrumpet?

Anſ. An Adamant that drawes, & a Panther that with her painted skin doth allure men, and he that ſurfets with it, drinketh deadly poyſon and ſo doth periſh.

Qu. What are womens lookes?

Anſ. Kalends, that can determine no certaintie.

Qu. Of what nature and condition is a woman?

Anſ. Of the nature of quickſiluer, for as this mettal whereſoeuer it meeteth with gold it mingleth with it: ſo womē they chiefly reſpect in a man his wealth, and alwaies will they priſe gold for beautie or for any other internall or externall felicitie.

Qu. Which are the two only means to win womens fauour?

Anſ. Sweet words and high praiſes.

Qu. What men are in one of the higheſt degrees of miſerie?

An. Thoſe that are wiſe by their own woes, and thoſe can make a right anatomy of miſery by their owne diſtreſſe.

Qu. What is a bad woman?

Anſ. A painted continent of flattery, of deceit, of inconſtancy, and the very guide that leads men vnto the pernicious labyrinth of endleſſe miſery.

Qu. What are womens curteſies?

Anſ. Sharpe ſhowers.

Qu. Who ſlew the fourth part of the world?

Anſ. Cain ſlaying his brother Abel.

Qu. What flower is in ſight moſt beautifull, in ſmell moſt ſauerous, and in operation moſt deadly?

Anſ. The pleaſures of this world.

Qu. What is man?

Anſ. The image of Chriſt.

Qu. What is a woman?

Anſ. The ſimilitude of man, and a cabinet of much good and euill.

Qu. What is a yong man?

Anſ. A burning candle ſoone perceiued and quickly quenched.

Qu. What is more ſwifter then the wind?

Anſ. A mans thought.

Qu. What is mote ſwifter then the thought of a man?

Anſ. Time, for it tarrieth for nothing.

Qu. What is ſeldome ſeene and neuer preuented?

Anſ. Deſtinie.

Qu. Which is the chiefeſt touchſtone to try a mans friend and his owne patience?

Anſ. Aduerſitie.

Qu. What vices did darken Marcus Antonius his great liberalitie and patience in aduerſitie?

Anſ. Dicing, drunkenneſſe, gluttony, and too much familiarity with his domeſtike ſeruants.

Qu. What are the effects of Poetry?

Anſ. Spurres and enticements to vertue.

Qu. Why did the Romans forbid the drinking of Wine to women?

Anſ. Becauſe it doth prouoke them to luſt, and doth altogether extinguiſh reaſon in them.

Qu. What ought a ſeruant chiefly to practiſe for to gaine his maiſters fauour?

Anſ. Diligence, continuance and ſecreſie.

Qu. Who killeth a man friendly?

Anſ. A flatterer.

Qu. What ſoile beares both the beſt and the worſt fruit?

Anſ. The wombe of a woman.

Qu. Why are Angels painted with wings?

Anſ. To ſignifie their quickneſſe.

Qu. What might men doe to be beleeued?

Anſ. Wet their tongues on their hearts.

Qu. What difference is there betweene loue and friendſhip?

Anſ. As much as there is betweene beauty and vertue, ſubſtance and ſhadowes, for when aduerſities flow then loue dooth ebbe, but friendſhip ſtandeth alwaies faſt in euery ſtorme and tempeſt.

Qu. What pleaſure is chiefly bought with repentance?

Anſ. The loue of a ſtrumpet.

Qu. What are the diſcommodities attending vpon trauellers?

Anſ. To bee forced to fit their humour to euery place and perſon, to beare many mens braues or feele the force of their weapon, to bee oft in danger of theeues, many times of wild beaſtes, and euer of flatterers.

Qu. Why did the Caldies whē they would ſet forth the picture of a Gentleman, deſcribe him with his hands alwaies open?

Anſ. To ſignifie that liberality was the only impreaſe of a Gentleman, and that to giue was alwaies heroicall: and therfore Titus Emperour of Rome was woont to ſay: Giue, if thou wilt bee worthy the worlds Monarchy.

Qu. What things are moſt welcome, moſt ſweet, and beſt liked of?

Anſ. Inexpected chaunces, loſſes recouered, and things ſeldome ſeene.

Qu. Wherevnto may flatterers bee compared?

Anſ. To trencher flies, that attend more vpon a man for hope of gain then for any perfite loue. To doues that flock chiefly where the houſe is faireſt. To emptie veſſels that haue lowd ſounds, and haue nothing within but wind. To painted ſheaths that haue ruſtie blades. To glorious flowers that haue no ſmell: becauſe they pretend much friendſhip, and containe nothing but ſuperficiall flattery.

Qu. What is Loue?

Anſ. A paſsion full of Martyrdome, Miſery, Griefe and Diſcontent, hauing pleaſures but tempered with paines, & a ſhort delight mixed with a long repentance.

Qu. What is beauty?

Anſ. A fading flower, to day fit for the eie, and to morrow withered and to bee caſt into the graue.

Qu. Why did the ancients in old time paſt miſlike of thoſe that wiſhed and deſired to be moſt happy and fortunate?

Anſ. Becauſe that too much fortune breedeth forgetfulneſſe, a contempt of God and of all godlineſſe.

Qu. For what cauſe were women being met at Rome in the ſtreetes by any of their kindred, kiſſed by them?

Anſ. For to know if they had drunken wine, for it was forbidden vnto them to drink any, as it appeareth by one Egnatius that ſlew his wife, becauſe ſhe had drunk a cup of wine.

Qu. What was the reaſon that king Ageſilaus would neuer ſuffer his picture to be drawne or ſhadowed?

Anſ. Becauſe his onely intent was to leaue after him his deedes to ſerue in ſteed of his picture, and ſo rather to repreſent the perfections of the mind, then the external lineaments of the body.

Qu. What are open praiſes?

Anſ. Secret flatteries.

Qu. Which are the three chiefeſt vertues of a ſouldior?

Anſ. Prudence, Fortitude, and Liberalitie.

Qu. What is Wiſdome?

Anſ. A diuine influence infuſed into the minds of men, which keepeth them from committing that wherevnto they are forced by ſenſuall appetite.

Qu. Why is vertue placed by equal proportion betweene two vices?

Anſ. Becauſe that the mean which is kept betweene two extreames, is that laudible action which by no other name can bee tearmed but by the title of Vertue.

Qu. What maketh men in earth famous, in their graues glorious, and in the heauens immortall?

Anſ. Vertue.

Qu. What is prodigalitie?

Anſ. A fire of the mind, which is ſo impatient in heat, as it ceaſeth not while any matter cōbuſtible is preſent to burne neceſſary things to duſt and cinders.

Qu. Who is only to be accounted a valiant man?

Anſ. He that without any furious or raſh reſolution feareth not to hazard himſelf in the greateſt perils whatſoeuer, for the welfare of his countrey.

Qu. What is the greateſt preiudice that may happen vnto a Commonwealth?

Anſ. To be gouerned by an vnwiſe prince.

❧ Diuers pretty Riddles with darke ſentences.
Question. IVdge of me by perfect skill, My youth reſtord by caſting bill. Solution. An Eagle.
Question. When I am old I caſt my skinne, Whereby I doe come yong againe. Solution. A Snaile.
Question. What Iudge on the earth did giue, The greateſt ſentence when hee did liue. Solution. Pilate when hee pronounced ſentence of condemnation againſt Chriſt Ieſus.
Queſtion. White I am and blacke withall, I haue eies and yet am blind, Gaine and loſſe not without brall I doe procure, as you ſhall find. Solution. Dice.
Question. I wound the heart and pleaſe the eye, Tell me what I am by and by. Solution. Beautie.
Question. I am within as white as ſnow, Without as greene as hearbes that grow, I am higher then a houſe, And yet leſſer then a mouſe. Solution. A Walnut hanging on the tree.
Queſtion. A mayd there was that married a man, By whom were many children gotten, Yet all them died and went away, Before their mother was begotten. Solution. It was Eue and her children who all died ere ſhe was begotten, for ſhe was neither borne nor begotten, but created.
Queſtion. What mother a child doth beget And ſhe of it is gotten againe, Which although ſtrange it ſeemes to be, Yet it is true I tell thee plaine. Solution. Water turning to Iſe, and Iſe again turning to water.
Question. Tis blacke without and blacke within, And hath foure corners as I win. Solution. A drie Turfe.
Queſtion. Oedipus that whilom haſt reſolued a greater doubt, Vnfold this Riddle vnto mee which now I ſhall put out. When I did liue then was I dumbe, & yeeld no harmony, But being dead I doe affoord moſt pleaſant melody. Solution. Any muſicall inſtrument that is made of wood.
Question. Yet once againe I meane to prooue thy skill but in a ieſt, Which if thou doeſt reſolue to mee thou ſetſt my mind at reſt: Whether was man created firſt before the beard, or els The beard before the man, that ſhew, and thou ſhalt win the bels. Solution. All creatures created were before man in their kind, And ſo was eke the bearded goat as wee in bookes doe find.
Queſtion. In at the window when I looke (Beat not your braine long about this) Then in the houſe about I go, Now tell me quickly what it is. Solution. The ſhining of the ſunne.
Question. She ſet her backe againſt the wall And tooke vp petticote ſmocke and all, There came a yong man with a gin, And put it in a handfull in. Solution. A ſhoemaker put a new paire of ſhoes on a womans foot.
Queſtion. There dwell foure ſiſters neere this towne, In fauour like and like in gowne When they runne for a prize to win All at once they doe begin One runs as faſt as doth the other Yet cannot ouertake ech other. Solution. The foure wings of a Windmill.
Queſtion. When it through the wood doth goe It toucheth euery twigge below. Solution. It is the Snow.
Question. When it doth goe through the wood, It toucheth neuer a twigge forſooth. Solution. A penny in a mans purſe.
Queſtion. I lay in bed and woe I was, So did my wife but worſe ſhe was, She bid me riſe and put it in, And thus we were both well againe. Solution. A man with his wife lying in bed together heard ſome theeues about their houſe, wherevpon both being afeared, the good wife praied her husband to riſe and ſparre the dore.
Queſtion. What is it that moſt nooſes hath, Within the houſe made of a plate. Solution. The hangers where the pothookes hangs vpon.
Queſtion. I am foule to be lookd vnto, Yet many ſeeke me for to win, Not for my beautie nor my skin, But for my wealth and force to know: Hard is my meat whereby I liue, Yet I bring men to daintie fare, If I were not, then ale knights ſhould To ſing this ſong not be ſo bold, Nutmegs, Ginger, Sinamon and Cloues, They gaue vs this iolly red noſe, The fourth parts of the earth I ſhow The time and howers as they doe goe. As needfull am I to mankind, As any thing that they can find. Many doe take me for their guide, Who otherwiſe ſhould runne aſide. Solution. It is the loadſtone, for without it no Pilot were able to guide a ſhip in the Occean ſeas.
Question. I am a cheefe ſtrength of the land When vpon foure pillers I ſtand And if theſe foure ſhould faile indeed Then ſhould I find two more at need, Foure lights I haue to be my guide, And the fiſt ſhall not ſtand aſide, For tis more brighter then the ſunne, And doth remaine when life is done, And though one corpes two heads dooth weare, No monſter yet is it I ſweare. Vnknit this knot, and tell to me, At leiſure ſir what I might be. Solution. A horſeman being a horſebacke, who hath foure eies with thoſe of his horſe: and firſt is his reaſonable ſoule, whereby he is chiefly guided nor is not ſubiect vnto death.
Queſtion. Sixe Hares did run within a plaine, whom hounds had ſtarted out the neſt: Hill vp, hill downe, they ran amaine till they were weary, and then did reſt. They caught them once and ſcapd againe more eager went they then before. And tooke more paines then (as I win) to bare away the game and more. The hounds and hunters all were one, ech lik'd his game and tooke his pray But when the ſport was paſt and done they left the Hares, and came away. Solution. It is a match at bowles played in a bowling alley.
Queſtion. Ten mens length, and tenne mens ſtrength, and ten men cannot rayre it. Solution. A cable or rope which tenne men cannot breake by force.
Queſtion. Aman I was, man I am But yet as tame as any lam. Though I am blind the way I ſhew, Which all men that ſee me muſt goe. And to put your mind out of doubt, Eight legges I haue that beare about My burden, more then any hath Vnleſſe he be in my eſtate. In time therefore doe learne of mee, As I before haue done of thee. If he had knowne that brought our woe Ventred had not vpon his foe, But for his fault we ſubiect bee To this eſtate where you ſee me, I am that which you leaſt deſire, But yet that you ſhould moſt require, Geſſe what I am good fit, therefore Before you doe knocke at my dore. Solution. It is a dead man and thoſe foure that do carry him to his graue, with Adam our firſt parent who brought death into the world.
Queſtion. It ſwallowes raw fleſh ſtones and all And in the middeſt it hath a toong, Which neuer ſpake ill of old or yoong. Solution. It is a Hauke that takes his ſtones for to caſt.
Question. Ouer a hole two ſtones there lie, Stiffe it went in, limber comes our, Beloued it is of women all And of our neighbours here about. Solution. It is corne that comes of the mill.
Queſtion. Sharpe are my clothes as any pin, be not raſh therefore me to win. But bring me naked to thy mill, and then with me thy mind fulfill. And though ſweet thou findſt me to be, yet ſurfeit not ſir vpon me. But for a change vſe me ſomewhile, ſo ſhalt thou not thy loue beguile. Solution. It is a Cheſſenut, and by the mill is ment the mouth.
Queſtion. In open field I cannot lie, And yet I may reſt quietly, Within a boxe of luory. Solution. It is a feather in a windy day.
Question. Stiffe ſtanding, ruffe hanging Betweene a maids legs In a froſtie morning. Solution. It is a diſtaffe.
Queſtion. I am as little as any nit, And ſerues the king at euery bit. Solution. Salt.
Question. Who weares his end about his middle Once in his time, tell me this Riddle. Solution. A theefe whoſe armes are tied with the halter wherewith he ſhall be executed.
Queſtion. My fleſh and skin is red, But white is all my heart, Where round about a wall is ſet, Beaten with euery dart. Solution. It is a Cherry and a cherriſtone.
Queſtion. Yonder is it, and here I haue it. Solution. A mans breath, or any other liuing creatures.
Queſtion. What wight is he that many doth feed And yet himſelfe doth die for need Solution. A preacher inſtructing others, and doth quite contrarie to his owne doctrine, and by theſe meanes ſtarueth his ſoule.
Queſtion. Tell me ſir whom I might be, a father I had, but mother none, Yet many a mother haue had of me, who all to earth with me are gone. Solution. Our firſt parent Eue who had no mother, and no other father then God almighty.
Queſtion. What is moſt likeſt to a horſe (Beſides a Mare he meanes) That feedeth vpon hay and graſſe, Vpon Peaſe, vpon Beanes. Solution. A Gelding.
Queſtion. My husband giues two gownes to me of ſundry colours euery yeare, Greene is the one, which I doe weare So long till it be all thredbare, White is the other as the Swan, of many peeces vp and downe, Yet like to that few workmen can deuiſe to make another gowne. The wiſer ſort (wherein they dote) doe call mee foole vpon a toy, But yet of me they take a note That death is paſt when I doe ioy. Solution. It is a Mulbery tree, greene in the Summer, and white with Snow in the Winter, who in Latine is called Morus, which ſignifies in Greek a foole. This tree is of this nature, that it will not caſt any buds before all other trees haue, whereby wee certainely know when ſhe begins to bud that the cold and Winter is altogether paſt for that preſent ſeaſon.
Queſtion. A ſhip there driues vpon the tide, that ſailes doe beare, ſhe hath no maſts, But one oare ſhe hath of ech ſide, her ſailes the ſnow in whiteneſſe paſſe. In her front weares too lanternes bright but when ſhe is vpon point to fall Then lend an eare, for great delight of muſicke ſhe affords to all. Solution. It is a Swanne, who being neer her death ſings moſt ſweetly, as authors doe record.
Queſtion. God ſpeed wife, and good ſpeed dame, Shall I put my rough rombello in your rough hame, Put him in, and clap to the gate For new ſhauen it was of late. Solution. A horſe put into a new mowen meddow.
Question. Round I am, yet cannot reſt, When I am ſpited of the beſt. Solution. A Tennis ball when two good players play together.
Queſtion. What man is he of wit ſo baſe That weares both his eies in a caſe For feare of hurting them it is, And I doe find it not amiſſe. Solution. It is he that cannot well ſee without ſpectacles, and doth carry them about him in a caſe for feare of breaking them.
Queſtion. My prey I ſeeke the fields and woods about & haue more teeth thē beaſt within the lād, And whēſoeuer my graue I haue found out, then ſafe I bring it to my maiſters hand, Vpon my backe the deare he laies and there doth kill one, ſometime more, He ſhuts me vp and goes his waies, Better contented then before. Solution. It is a combe and a louſe killed vpon the backe of it.
Question. A tree there is that boughes doth beare in number fiue as I doe know, Of equall length they neuer were, and on their tops doe hornes grow, Yet they are tied about with gold except the longeſt without doubt, Which for vſe ſake might be controld, if it with gold were hoopt about. Solution. It is ones hand & his fingers that are full of golden rings, the middlemoſt excepted, becauſe a ring doth not fit that finger.
Question. I was Not, I am Not, and ſhall Not bee, yet I do walke as men may ſee, I runne and ſpeake to get a fee though I am not in my degree. Solution. It is a man whoſe ſirname was maſter Not.
Queſtion. Deaffe I am and cannot heare, and when I worke I feele no paine, Some doe curſe me, ſome ſpeake me faire though well they know it is in vaine. Solution. Dice and dicers.
Queſtion. What bloody Tyrant was that wight, That with a murthring blow The fourth part of the earth did ſlay: Which thou canſt tell I trow. Solution. Cain in ſlaying of his brother Abell.
Queſtion. In what place of the earth dooth the skie ſeeme to bee No larger then a yard or twaine, which I pray tell to mee. Solution. In the bottome of a well.
Queſtion. A thing that I take that I looſe, yet nothing to my woe, And that I take not, that I keepe, yet would it faine forgoe. Solution. He that is louſie, all thoſe lice which hee takes throwes them away, and thoſe that he cannot take keepes them ſtill, and yet would faine be rid of them.
Queſtion. What thing is onely vpon this earth not ſubiect vnto feare, Nor doth not waigh the threatnings of Tyrants, pinne or haire? Solution. A good conſcience.
Queſtion. What doth with his root vpwards grow, And downwards with his head doth ſhow. Solution. An iſeſickle.
Queſtion. What is leſſer then a Mouſe, And hath more windowes then a houſe. Solution. A ſpider in the middeſt of his web, or els a thymbell.
Question. Belly to belly Hand vpon backe, I put a raw morſell In a gaping gap. Solution. A mother or nurſe that giues ſucke vnto her child.
Queſtion. I doe walke yet doe not goe, I doe drinke yet no thirſt ſlake, I doe eat yet doe not feed, I doe worke yet no worke make. Solution. It is a man that dreams, who in his dream ſeemes to doe all theſe things, yet in deed doth none of them.
Question. As bitter as gall, As ſweet as milke, As high as a hale, and hard withall. Solution. A Walnut vpon the tree.
Question. I am nor fiſh, nor fleſh, nor voice, Yet when I am borne I make a noiſe. Solution. A fart, or els the thunder.
Queſtion. When we by the way doe goe, Vpon our ſhoulders we beare our way If wee were not then many ſhould be Wet to the skin in a rainy day. Solution. Maſons, Tylers, and men of ſuch like occupation, carrying ladders vpon their ſhoulders to build and tile houſes.
Queſtion. M. and I. did make great mone, When C. vpon C. was left alone. Solution. Mary and Iohn made great mone, When Chriſt vpon the croſſe was left alone.
Queſtion. When I to the wood doe goe, Then my head homewards I doe ſhow. Solution. An axe.
Question. In me and in my ſhining light. Solution. It is a burning candle.
Question. In the laſt minute of mine age I doe waxe young againe, And haue ſo ſtill continued, ſince world did firſt beginne. Solution. It is the Moone.
Queſtion. I doe owe moſt yet nothing doe I pay, Euill I am, and the worſt I ſay. Solution. Ingratitude, which monſter receiueth good turnes and paieth vengeance.
Question. What men are thoſe that backwards gaine, Their ſmall liuing, not without paine. Solution. Gardeners and Ropemakers.
Question. Old I am ere I am borne And when I am hatched, take heed of mee, Or els thou maieſt ſoone be forlorne If thou doeſt nothing looke to thee. Solution. The grudge of a ſecret enemie long conceiued in mind ere it is put in execution.
Question. What is it that God cōmanded to be done, was not done, and yet God was well pleaſed. Solution. The ſacrificing of Iſaac.
Queſtion. My belly to thy ſide I lay, And the hole is a ſporting when we play. Solution. It is a Bagpipe.
Queſtion. Hitty pitty within the wall, And hitty pitty without the wall, If you touch hitty pitty (my ioy) Hitty pitty will bite the boy. Solution. It is a nettle.
Question. Clincke clancke vnder a bancke, Tenne aboue foure and neere the flancke. Solution. A maid milking of a Cow.
Question. Trip trap in a gap, As many feet as a hundred ſheepe. Solution. It is the haile when it fals.
Queſtion. Red within and red without, It is as ruffe as a Beares ſnout. Solution. A ſtrawbery.
Question. A wicked father did beget A daughter fit vnto his hand. But ſuch good children ſhe did get That are the props of euery land. Solution. The deuill begot ſinne, and ſin procured good lawes which are the ſtaies of all gouernements.
Queſtion. God ſpeed faire ladies by one and by one, I am ſent I cannot tell to whom, And I doe bring I cannot tell what, I count her wiſe that tels me that. Solution. A louer ſent to his loue a meſſenger to put her in mind of her promiſe as to come vnto him, and ſhe ſent backe this anſwer vnto him. Tell thy maiſter in my name Wheen trees are turnd and wels be dry And dead vpon quicke then come will I. Meaning at midnight, when the fire brands ſhould be turned vpwards, and the pots ſhould bee empty, and the fire raked vp with the cold aſhes, thē ſhe would come.
Queſtion. I went and I could not tell whether, I met and I wot not with whom, He gaue me that I ſhall neuer forget, And yet I came a maiden home. Solution. A child that went to chriſtening.
Question. I haue a ſmith without a hand He workes the worke that no man can He ſerues our God and doth man eaſe Without any fire in his furnace. Solution. It is a Bee that makes honny and waxe.
Queſtion. Foule is my fault that feeds me full, To gorge on mothers bowels ſtill, I went abroad to ſeeke my fire, And my wiues ſonne I doe deſire Such a one the man muſt be As is the ſonne of wife to me. Solution. Ioſeph went to ſeeke Chriſt, when hee found in the Temple Preachers amongſt thoſe of the Synagogue.
Question. What is it that in the morning vpon foure legs doth goe, And about noone it ſtandeth faſt vpon two and no moe: 〈2 pages missing〉
I make all blind as did delight.
Queſtion. I am cald by the name of man, yet am as little as the mouſe, When Winter comes I loue to be with my red gorget neere the houſe. Solution. A Bird called Robin red breſt.
Queſtion. Although my bodie little is, yet I doe pleaſe the hearers eare If I were tame it were not amiſſe, Then I ſhould liue in leſſer feare. Solution. The Nightingale.
Queſtion. What is it that more eies doth weare then fortie men within the land, Which gliſter as the chriſtall cleare, againſt the ſunne when they doe ſtand. Solution. A Peacockes taile.
Queſtion. When I goe to the water ſide at home my heart I leaue behind, Tell me what I am without pride, if it by any meanes you find. Solution. It is a pillowbeare.
Queſtion. My head is round, my bodie ſmall, And I hold that, that ſauours all. Solution. A Salt ſeller and Salt.
Question. Head and eie I am only, What I may be now tell to me. Solution. A button of copper or of any mettall.
Question. A Bird vpon a houſe I ſaw, ſixe legs it had, yet but one taile, Two heads beſides more then a daw name me this Bird and win the ale. Solution. A hearnſhaw had taken a frog & brought it to her yong ones in the neſt made vpon the top of a houſe.
Queſtion. All my body belly is And leſſer then it my mouth is not I doe containe that makes men mad What I am ſir now tell me that. Solution. A malt ſack full of malt wherwith ſtrong drinke is brued.
Question. My belly is bigger then all the reſt Wherein men vſe to put the beſt, Broad is my foot, ſhort is my necke, If ill ye vſe me then feare a checke. Solution. A bottle of glaſſe.
Question. My coat is greene and I can prate, Of diuers things about my grate, In ſuch a priſon I am ſet That hath more loopholes then a net. Solution. A Parret in a cage of wyar.
Queſtion. I doe aſſemble many wight, Yet I keepe me out of their ſight, And doe not come once where they be, Yet euery day they may ſee me. Solution. A bell touling to a ſermon.
Queſtion. What mill is it that hath two wings which flie about without the wind A greaſie miller lookes to all things whiles it doth turne and doth not grind. Solution. It is a iacke, and the greaſie miller is the cooke.
Worthy ſayings and readie anſweres, compyled into one booke out of ſundrie Chronicles, by A. P.
A very fit and fine compariſon made by a Gentleman of Genua.

LOdowicks force willing to exact a great and an extraordinary ſum of money vpon the inhabitants of the city of Genua. His embaſſadour was bid by one of the cheefeſt of the citty to dinner, and a little before dinner as they were walking in the garden together, and the Cittizen eſpying the hearbe Baſil ſaid vnto the Embaſſador: Runne ſoftly my Lord with your hand ouer this hearbe, and then ſmell vnto it, which hee did, confeſsing it to haue a moſt ſweet and comfortable ſauor. Now my lord (quoth the Cittizen) ſtraine and bruſe this hearbe in your hand and then ſmell vnto it, which hee did, affirming it to haue a noiſome and foule ſmell. Wherevpon the Cittizen ſaid vnto him, my lord, if the Duke Lodowick runneth ſoftly with the hand of his power and authoritie ouer this citty without either force or violence, he ſhall find her of a good ſmell and wonderfull obedient, but if hee doth oppoſe himſelfe againſt her and dooth ſtraine and force her, ſhee will yeeld him a ſower and a hard taſt and ſauour by diſobedience and rebellion. The humanitie of Princes maketh obedient and tractable Cittizens.

The anſwere of Iouian Pontanus.

IOuian Pontanus a very excellent Poet & Philoſopher being demaunded vpon a time wherefore he did eat but of one diſh at meales, and of that yet very ſoberly: anſwered, To the end I ſhould haue no need of the Phiſition.

All Phiſitions affirme that the diuerſity of meats hindereth digeſtion, and breedeth diſeaſes.

A compariſon made by a Spaniard.

THe lord Gonſalues playing at dice and being a great looſer, perceiued his ſon Alexander to be greeued at it, wherevpon he ſaid vnto certain Gentlemen there preſent, The Hyſtories record that Alexander the Great being a child did weepe when he heard that Philip his father had obtained the victory of a battell, and beſides had conquered a kingdome all at once: And being demanded wherefore hee wept, anſwered that hee feared that his father would winne ſo many realms and countries that hee ſhould leaue him none for to conquer. And quite contrarie (quoth the lord Gonſalues) is it with my ſonne Alexander now readie to weepe for my croſſe lucke and great loſſes, becauſe hee feareth that I ſhall looſe ſo much that I ſhall leaue him nothing for to looſe.

A pretty quippe giuen vnto two Cardinals by a Painter.

RAphell Vrbin being a very excellent and skilfull Painter, vpon a time hearing two Cardinals (with whome hee was very familiar) to reprooue and find fault (only for to anger him) with a certaine picture of S. Peter and S. Paule, which hee had very artificially painted and finiſhed, ſaying that the pictures faces were too high coloured and too red, without further ſtudying gaue them this anſwere: My lords maruaile not hereat, for I haue purpoſely ſo painted them as they are now in heauen, and not as they were here vpon earth, for this redneſſe commeth vnto them bluſhing euen for very ſhame to ſee the church ſo ill gouerned by ſuch and ſuch like as your lordſhips.

The anſwere which the great Turke gaue to the Embaſſadours of the King of Hungarie.

BAiazet Emperor of the Turkes, inuading with a great army Bulgary a part of Hungary, The king Sigiſmondus ſent his embaſſadors vnto him to deſire him not to moleſt & trouble his ſubiects and countrie, wherevnto by no law he had not any right claime or title. Baiazet to anſwere herevpon, cauſed great ſtore of armours and other warlike inſtruments to be brought into a certaine hall appointed for that purpoſe, and hauing ſent for the Kings Embaſſadors, ſaid vnto them: Loe here (my lords, pointing with his finger vpon the armours) the titles whereby I doe claime, and am to poſſeſſe the crowne and kingdome of Hungarie.

Right and equitie haue no place in the court of a Tyrant.

A pleaſant reproouing of the Marques of Mantua.

FRederick Marqueſſe of Mantua, as he did ſit at dinner among many Gentlemen, one of them hauing almoſt made an end of his porrige, ſupt vp the reſt, and to excuſe his inciuilitie craued pardon of the companie. The Marqueſſe in preſence of them all gaue him this ready anſwere, ſir, aske pardon of the Swine, for vnto vs you haue done no offence or iniury.

A worthy deed of an Italian knight.

AN Italian knight as hee was ſitting at dinner, ſaw two Gentlemen that had alwaies behaued themſelues moſt valiantly in the warres and had done good ſeruice to their countrie, to ſtand as abiects of the cō panie, becauſe all places were taken before: wherevpon he did riſe, and ſo cauſed all the reſt to riſe with him for to make place vnto theſe two Gentlemen, ſaying: Giue place vnto theſe two Gentlemen for to eat their meat, for if they had not beene with vs in ſuch a fight (naming the place) wee ſhould at this time haue had nothing for to eat.

The tyrannicall ſentence of Proſpero Colonna.

PRoſpero Colonna Collonell of the Italian infanterie within the Garriſon of Milan, a Cittizen of the twon came vnto him complaining againſt the exactions ſpoiles and forceable robberies of his ſouldiours, vnto whom hee gaue this anſwere: Mylan is like vnto a Gooſe, for the more he is pulled the fairer will be his feathers.

Of Pope Sixtus the fourth and a Frier.

POpe Sixtus the fourth hauing beene a Frier of S. Francis order, and being aduanced to the Papall dignitie, was viſited vpon a certaine time by a Frier of his Order, who had been one of his chiefeſt friends and familiars: the Pope willing to ſhew him ſome priuate fauour, brought him into his cabinet, wherein he had a very rich treaſure, and ſmiling ſaid vnto the poor Frier: Now Frater, I cannot ſay that which S. Peter my predeceſſor ſaid: Aurum nec argentum habeo, I haue neither gold nor ſiluer. It is moſt true (quoth the Frier) but holy Father you cannot ſay likewiſe as he ſaid to the impotent, creple and lame, Surgite & ambulate, Ariſe and walke.

The wiſe ſaying of Charles the fift Emperour.

NEwes being brought vnto the Emperor as he ſat in counſell, that the Marques of Guaſſa was with all his forces diſcōfited by the Frenchmen, Cardinall Grandelle his Chancellor, fearing that the affaires of the Realme ſhould ſucceed the worſe for it, ſaid to the Emperour: Sacred Maieſtie, this ill reencountre is to be kept ſecret. Wherevpon the Emperour anſwered, It is not poſsible to keepe things cloſe done before ſo manie witneſſes, but that which is yet to bee done and attempted, is not to be reuealed.

It is very daungerous to a Realme when the enemie knoweth the ſecrets as ſoone as they are determined.

Of the humilitie of Godefrey Duke of Buillon.

VVHen the Duke Godefrey of Buillon with conſent of all the Chriſtian Princes was choſen king of Ieruſalem, and therevpon the royall crowne was offered and preſented vnto him, he did refuſe it, ſaying: It is not meet for mee a Chriſtian Prince to weare a crowne of gold, whereas Chriſt King of Kings did weare but one of thornes.

The laſt will of Saladin King of Aſia.

SAladin King of Aſia, Syria, and Aegypt, declared vpon his death bed how miſerable hee knew the nature and ſtate of man to bee: and therefore commanded that being dead they ſhould cauſe his ſhert to bee carried vpon a launce through all his camp, and inſight of all the lords, captaines, and ſouldiors of his army, and hee that ſhould carrie it ſhould crie with a lowd voice, Saladin ſubduer and vanquiſher of all Aſia amongſt all his riches which hee hath gotten and conquered, carrieth nothing with him but this only linnen.

The greateſt triumphs of man in parting out of this world, are the workes of charitie and godlineſſe.

The wiſe anſweres of Antonius Panormus to King Alphonſus.

ANtonius Panormus being demaunded of the King what was moſt neceſſary and requiſit vnto them that would liue together peaceablie in the ſtate of marriage, becauſe that moſt commonly as the Poet ſayth:

Semper habet lites alternaque ſurgia lectus Inqua nupta iacet,

that is,

With quietneſſe is ſeldome bleſt, The bed wherein a wife doth reſt.

Anſwered, that there were two thinges moſt requiſite: The firſt, that the husband were deaffe, for not to heare all the follies, ſcolding wordes, and ill reports of his wiues diſordered life: The ſecond, that the wife were blind, for not to ſee the great enormitie and exceſsiue intemperance of her husband.

Of King Lewys of Fraunce and a ſouldiour.

KIng Lewys in his wars againſt the Emperor being on a time in one of his battels ſomewhat far from any of his companies, a certaine Germane knight thinking to make himſelfe rich by the preſent oportunitie, ſurpriſed the king vnawares, & ſtaying his Maieſties horſe by the bridle, cried out with a loud voice, The king is taken. The king full of courage and magnanimitie drew his courtelax, and gaue the poor ſouldiour ſuch a blow that he fel dead vpon the ground; and then ſaid, Now you may ſee bold and aduenterous knight that at cheſſe the king was neuer taken alone.

Of the ſaid King and the Chauncellor of Bourgony.

THe ſaid king Lewys hauing heard that the Duke of Bourgony his Chauncellor, being a very rich and wealthy man, had founded and erected in his countrey a verie ſumptuous and a coſtly hoſpitall aſwell in building as in moouables, ſaid that it was more then reaſon that the Chauncellour of Bourgonie (who had in his life time made many poore men) ſhould at the end of his daies build an Hoſpitall for to lodge and to releeue them.

The ſubtill anſwere of Edward King of England vnto Iohn King of France.

DVring the truce which was betweene Edward King of England, and Iohn King of France, the Engliſhmen by compoſition and a great ſumme of money took the caſtle and the towne of Guines, wherevpon King Iohn complained, ſaying that the King of England had broken the truce of peace ſo ſolemnly confirmed by oth, and had done contrarie to the contract thereof. The King of England gaue him this anſwere, I haue not (quoth he) broken the leaſt point of the contract, for in it is neuer an article contained, whereby it is forbidden to trafficke together, & to exerciſe the truce of marchandiſe one with another.

Touching a benefice.

A Certaine Eccleſiaſticall man hauing but one benefice, railed and inneighed moſt ſharply alwaies againſt thoſe that were Non reſidents. It came to paſſe by tract of time that hee happened to ioine one benefice to another, and as he was for it reproued by ſome of his friendes, who oftentimes had heard him ſpeake and preach againſt it, and had knowne him alwaies to be of a contrarie opinion: gaue them this anſwere, I craue pardon for it ſirs for it was but for want of ſight, for hee that hath but one eie ſeeth not ſo cleare as he that hath two. My benefice which I had firſt was but one eie wherwith I did ſee, but now hauing two eies I perceiue things more apparent then before.

The words of Pope Iulius as touching the exerciſe of warres.

THis Pope was a man that loued wars, which purpoſely hee nouriſhed betweene kings and Princes, and as vpon a time ſome of his friendes did ſay vnto him, Holy Father, many noblemen find it verie ſtrange to ſee you to maintaine warres and ciuill broiles, ſeeing the eſtate where God hath called you vnto ſhould bee a place of peace and quietneſſe, ſaying that you do carry the keyes to that end for to ſhut out all diſcord and diſſention, and to let in all brotherly vnitie, whereas now they accuſe you to doe the contrary. Herevpon he anſwered and ſaid, Thoſe that haue ſpoken hereof vnto you, know not what they ſay: Haue yee not alwaies heard that S. Peter and S. Paule were companions (and in very deed they had but one church) my predeceſſors haue alwaies vſed S. Peters keies, but I will aid mee with the ſword of Saint Paule. One amongſt them replied herevpon and ſaid, you know holy Father that our Lord ſaid vnto S. Peter, Put vp thy ſword into his ſheath: It is true (quoth the Pope) but it was after the blow was giuen.

By theſe words he declared that he was Martiall altogether.

Of King Alphonſus and his ieſter.

ALphonſus King of Naples, had in his court a certaine ieſter who was wont to write in a booke all ſuch follies which in his iudgement ſeemed worthy to be noted, which ſuch as were courtiers did oftentimes commit. It happened that the King himſelfe had occaſion to ſend a Blackamoore whom he had had long about him, into the Eaſt countries with ten thouſand Duckets for to buy horſes. The ieaſter according to his ordinarie vſe did enregiſter this act likewiſe among his other writings, as if he had accounted it but a meere point of follie. Not long after the King called for his booke, becauſe it was long ſince his Maieſty had read in it, and as hee was peruſing euerie thing, found at laſt the hyſtorie of himſelfe, of his Blackamoore, & of the thouſand duckets in it. The king being herewith offended, asked of his ieſter to what end he had put this in his booke, or what occaſion had mooued him ſo to doe: Becauſe, anſwered he, your Maieſtie hath not done wiſely in my ſimple iudgement to truſt your mony with a ſtranger, whome perhaps you are like to ſee no more. But if hee returneth (quoth the king) and bringeth with him the horſes, what wilt thou ſay then to it? Wilt thou then further accuſe me of folly? When hee ſhall be returned, anſwered the ieſter herevpon, I will blot your name out of my booke, and will put in his inſteed of it, for then he ſhall prooue a greater foole then your maieſtie.

Of the Archbiſhop of Colen and a laborer.

A Certain labourer as he ſaw vpon a time the Archbiſhop of Colen riding all in armes, and accompanied with a great troupe of ſouldiors, did heartely laugh at it. Herevpon being demaunded why hee did laugh, anſwered ſimply that hee did laugh, maruelling that S. Peter Chriſts vicar being himſelfe verie poore had left his ſucceſſors thus rich and wealthy, and were rather accompanied with Souldiours and Courtiers then churchmen. The Archbiſhop willing to inſtruct him better in this point, told him that he was a Duke by birth and an Archbiſhop by calling, and that hee at that preſent as Duke went thus in armes and guarded with ſouldiours, but when hee had occaſion to be in the church, that then hee vſed himſelfe as a Biſhop. My lord (quoth the labourer, I would to God then you would tell me that if the Dukes grace ſhould happen to fall to the deuils ſhare, what ſhould then become of my lord the Archbiſhop?

The ſentence of the Duke of Britane.

IOhn the eight Duke of Britane willing to marry his ſon Francis vnto Iſabell daughter to the king of Scotland: the yong Prince inquired what ſhe was for a lady, anſwere was made him that ſhe was a very fair Damoſell, well fauoured, comely of bodie, and well diſpoſed for to beare children, but that ſhee wanted vtterance. Shee is ſuch a one as I deſire quoth the yong Duke: for I account a woman wiſe inough when ſhe can make a difference betweene her husbands ſhert and his doublet, and knoweth his bed from another mans.

The anſwere which Empreſſe Barbara late wife to Sigiſmundus Emperor gaue to thoſe that gaue her counſell to remaine a widdow.

AFter the Emperor Sigiſmundus deceaſe, madame Barbara his late wife was counſelled by ſome of her familiers to continue in that bleſſed eſtate and to remaine a widdow, immitating the example of the Turtledoue, which after the death of her mate coupleth no more with any of her kind, but keepeth a perpetuall chaſtity. Herevpon the Empreſſe anſwered, If you counſell me to imitate and follow the conditions and nature of the birds, in whom there is no reaſon, why doe you not as wel alledge vnto mee the example of the Pigeons and Sparrowes which are birds in their kind, as well as of the Turtledoue?

Euen as the Turtledoue after the death of her mate doth couple no more with any other of her kind, euen ſo the Pigeon and the Sparrow are alwaies in loue indifferently with the birds of their nature and feather.

The auncient ceremony which was vſed in the creation and annointing of Kings.

VVHen any King was crowned in times paſt (which was commonlie in that place where his predeceſſours were buried) the Biſhop that ſhould annoint and inſtall him, carried before him in his left hand a ſmall bundle of tow, and in his right hand a burning torch or waxen candle, and as he was putting the fire vnto the flaxe, turned his face towards the king, and ſaid vnto him with a loud voice. Sic tranſit gloria mundi, So the pompe & glory of the world doth vaniſh away, which he repeated three times.

It was for to ioine humilitie to authoritie.

The anſwere which the Earle Lazaram gaue to the Tartarian Embaſſadors.

THe king of Tartary willing to inuade with a great power the kingdome of Hungarie, ſent his embaſſadors to the court of Lazaram with a Mule laden with a ſacke full of corne, to demand of him free and quiet paſſage through his countrie, ſo to enter into the kingdome of Hungary. The embaſſadors performing their commiſſion, found the Earle vpon one of his caſtels called Archforme: and being well informed of their charge, demaunded of him free paſſage for their lord and his army with ſuch due and faithful obedience as it became vnto him: their lord and king was elſe determined to ſend into his territories more Souldiours then there were grains of corne within the ſacke that was vpon the Mules backe, and therewith they ſcattered the corn ouer all the court of the caſtle. The Earle hauing heard them with patience, gaue them likewiſe a moſt bountifull entertainement, and appointing to giue them anſwere the third day, cauſed in the meane time to be gathered a great ſtore of Cockes, Hens, and Chickins, and to bee ſhut vp for his purpoſe three daies without meat, which being immediatly executed by his ſeruants, at the time expired, the Duke cauſed all theſe foules to bee brought into the court of his caſtell in preſence of the ſaid Embaſſadors, which in leſſe then half an houre had pickt vp all the corn thus ſcattered by the Tartarians. Herevpon the ſaid Earle ſaid to the Embaſſadours, Tel to your lord in my name, that notwithſtanding the great number of his men, yet ſhall hee nor bee able to ſet out ſo manie as ſhall ſuffice to ouercome and conquer vs, as you haue ſeene by the ſimilitude of my Chickins. God alſo gaue to the Earle the victorie.

The anſwere which Eraſmus of Roterdam ſent to king Francis.

KIng Francis hauing earneſtly ſollicited by ſome of his embaſſadors, that worthy and renowned perſonage Eraſmus of Roterdam, that it would pleaſe him to come into France, and receiue of him the beſt entertainement which he were able to giue him: for this king did account it one of his cheefeſt felicities to haue diuers learned men about him. Eraſmus ſent his Maieſtie this anſwere, Learned men (my ſoueraine) reſemble faire tapiſtries, which the further they ſtand remooued from the eie, the fairer and perfecter they ſeeme to bee, but if they are viewed and regarded neer by, they looſe much of their former grace, beauty & perfection. And therfore (my ſoueraign) pardon me if I had rather to remain your humble ſeruant in theſe parts where I am, in ſuch reputation with your maieſtie as I am already, then neerer vnto your highneſſe in leſſe fauour and eſtimation.

A most Chriſtian act done by the Earle of Anion.

FOokes the fift of that name Earle of Anion, as hee had wonne a great battell againſt his enemies neere the towne of Sees, his Souldiours had taken a great number of priſoners, whom they had bound, chained, and had lodged them within the church. The Earle in the morning willing to hear ſeruice, and ſeeing ſo many priſoners within the church, wonderfully diſpleaſed with it, turned his face towards his ſouldiors ſaying vnto them, My fellow-ſouldiors and friends, what haue you done, do ye not know that the church is the houſe of God and a place of praiers & of liberty? And you haue made it a priſon, and a den of thraldome; wherein you haue beene very much ouerſeene: and herevpon cauſed all the priſoners to bee looſed and ſet at libertie, and hauing giuen them meate and drinke ſent them all away without paying any ranſome.

A Paſquill of Leo the tenth.

PAſquil is an old piller of ſtone ſtanding in the market place of Rome, wherevpon euery firſt day of the year called New-years day, euery man faſteneth (cloſely notwithſtanding) many ſcrols, libels, and writings, in praiſe and diſpraiſe of Princes & great potentates. It happened that in Pope Leos daies the tenth of that name, there was ſet vpon this piller a white paper wherein theſe ſeuen letters ſtood written.

M. C. C. C. C. L. X.

THe Pope being very deſirous to vnderſtand the ſignification hereof, and knowing that euery man would interprete them by vertue of the letters numerable, 1460, being the date of a time paſt already, and knowing that theſe letters ſhould haue ſome other ſignification and intelligence, cauſed a diligent inquiry to bee made for to find him out that had ſet vp this ſcrol, and with much adoe the partie being found out at laſt and brought before the Pope, & earneſtly demaunded and examined vpon the interpretation of thoſe letters, did promiſe to declare & expound them vpon condition that his holineſſe would vouchſafe to pardon him and neuer to trouble or moleſt him for it. This being promiſed, hee ſaid vnto the Pope: Holy Father, theſe ſeuen letters will be thus interpreted.

Multi Cardinales Caeci, Creauerunt Caecū, Leonem, Decimum.
A worthy act of Galatius Duke of Milan.

IT was told to Galatius that there was in Milan a very craftie and ſubtill Lawier for inuenting of means to prolong cauſes, and to make them neuer ended whenſoeuer he had vndertaken to doe it either for fauour or els for money. The Duke deſirous to trie his skill, inquired of one of his ſtewards if there were nothing due to any that furniſhed his houſe with prouiſion and neceſſaries. The books of account being peruſed, there was found a hundreth pounds to be due to the Baker. Hereupon the Duke cauſed the poore man to repare before the Senate, and addreſsing himſelfe to this aduocate, demanded counſell of him for delaying the payment of this money. The Lawyer promiſed the Duke that he would find meanes and law that the Baker ſhould finger no part of that mony in a whole year, or els in two, if it ſeemed good vnto him. The cauſe being debated and ready to bee iudged, the Duke himſelfe demaunded of the Lawyer if it were poſsible to find ſome further remedy to delay the payment of the ſaid ſumme. To whome the crafty Lawyer anſwered, that the cauſe ſhould not bee ended yet in two years. O wonderfull iniuſtice (quoth the Duke) and man full of iniquitie? Knoweſt thou not that I owe the man this mony? Wilt thou againſt my conſcience & thine owne wilfully fruſtrate the poore of their right, and of that which is due vnto them? Shall a man go to law for that which he oweth, Take this villaine hence, ſaid he, vnto his men, and let him preſently be executed without further iudgement, and let his body be quartered, to the end that other may take example by his fall to beware of the like, and that hereafter the Commonwealth be no more corrupted by him. This ſentence with the full conſent of the Senat was preſently executed.

The great charity of a Duke of Sauoy.

A Certaine Duke of Sauoy being asked by the embaſſadors of the king of Naples, where his Gray-hounds were which he fed for the chaſe, and moreouer that it would pleaſe him to let them haue a view of them: The Duke did deferre it till the next day, ſaying, that if they would thē take the paines to come vnto him, they ſhould haue a ſight thereof. The next day as they came at the time appointed, hee brought them into a great and large hall, where a great number of poor people were eating and drinking at a long table. Behold now, quoth the Duke to the Embaſſadours, the Gray-hounds which I feed, wherewith I pretend to chaſe and to take (next that which my Sauior hath purchaſed for vs all) the kingdome of heauē and life euerlaſting.

The workes of charitie are of ſo great force that the Scripture in euery place doth moſt earneſtly commend them vnto vs, with ſuch an aſſurance of reward, that a cup of cold water ſhall not bee giuen for Gods ſake without a tenfold recompence.

The pleaſant anſwere of a Gentleman.

A Young Gentleman whoſe mother was lately deceaſed, did mourn for her, and being ſeene vpon a certaine time in the kings court mounted a horſe backe with his foot-cloth of crymſon veluet, the ladies & other damoſels of the court laughed him to ſcorn, ſaying, that they found it very ſtrange to ſee his horſe deckt with a foote-cloth of red veluet, whereas he himſelfe did mourne for the death of his Mother. My ladies (replied the Gentleman herevpon) you haue herein ſome reaſon, but yet ye ought to conſider likewiſe that the mother of my horſe is not yet dead as that he ſhould mourne for her.

Of Cardinall Coſſa that made himſelfe Pope by force.

THe Cardinals being aſſembled together in the citty of Bologne vpon the election of a new Pope immediately after the deceaſe of Pope Alexander, Cardinall Baltaſar Coſſa (biſhop of the ſaid place) came alſo there in counſel accompanied with a great number of ſouldiors, ſaying to all the Cardinals there preſent, if they did not chuſe a Pope according to his mind and liking, that hee would make them all to repent it. The whole aſſembly being aſtoniſhed at theſe threatnings, and ſeeing ſo many ſouldiors about the counſel houſe, named diuers vnto him, but none did like orcontent him. Herevpon as they were all taken with a great feare, willed him to name one himſelf, and if he were fit for the place, they ſaid that they would accept of him. Coſſa herevpon called for the Papall cope for to put it vpon him whome he would haue choſen, which as it was brought, took it, and caſting it ouer his owne ſhoulders ſaid, Ego ſum Papa. The Cardinals although it was an act againſt cuſtome, were notwithſtanding conſtrained to conſent to this extraordinary election, and called him Pope Iohn the thirteenth.

Ambition in all eſtates cauſeth great troubles, and bringeth the miniſtery in great contempt.

Of a requeſt preſented to king Alphonſus.

BEcauſe king Alphonſus was knowne to bee a Prince delighting greatly in the hearing and ſaying of wordes well and readily ſpoken. A certaine man of baſe degree and ſomwhar needy, addreſſed himſelfe to the king, ſaying, My ſoueraigne doe iuſtice vnto me and giue me the law, I haue a creditour to whome my father now lately deceaſed did owe a debt, my father left me nothing wherewith to pay him, yet notwithſtanding vpon his earneſt ſute I made ſhift to pay it him, and hee ſo inſtantly demaunded the ſame againe afterward of me, that I was forced to pay him the ſame debt againe: He yet not contented herewith, did moleſt me afterward againe for the ſame debt, and yet at this preſent ſues me moſt vehemently for it. I haue left nothing wherewith I ſhould pay him, and if your grace dooth not aſsiſt me in this extremity, I ſhall bee vndone for euer. Truly (quoth the king) this is an vnreaſonable and a moſt cruell creditor, What is he for one? My liege (anſwered the poore man) it is my belly, to whome I haue payed the debt ſo long and ſo oftentimes, that nothing is remained wherwith to content him any more, theſe are therefore humbly to intreat your grace to aſsiſt me in my wants, & to helpe me for to giue him his due. I haue ſuch another creditor (ſaid the king:) your grace ſpeaketh moſt true anſwered the poor man, but God be thanked you haue alwaies ynough wherewith to pay him, and not I. The King hearing this requeſt ſo well inuented, commanded a peece of mony to be giuen him.

King Lewis ſayings touching thoſe that had benefices and offices.

HEe was wont to ſay that aſſes had for the moſt part better daies and liued more at hearts eaſe then horſes did, for horſes (quoth he) run in poſt to Rome for prebends and benefices, whereof many aſſes are already prouided.

Of king Alphonſus.

THis king as hee heard vpon a time that a certaine king of Spain had ſaid that literature was not greatly to bee required in a Prince, anſwered, That this was bellowed as an oxe, and not ſpoken as a king: and that they were not the words of a man, but of a crowned aſſe.

Of the ſame king, and one begging another mans office.

A Certaine officer of his hauing with an amorous potion loſt his wits, one of the Courtiers did beg for his office and liuing, as if it were vnmeet that his place ware ſupplied by a mad man. It were a moſt vngodly deed (anſwered the king) to take the ſubſtance and liuing from him whom God hath barred from all meanes to get and gather any more hereafter.

The last will and Teſtament of a Lawyer.

A Certaine Lawyer hauing in his life time gathered together great riches, & hauing no kindred to whō he might bequeath his wealth, as he lay vpon his death bed, diſpoſed all his goods to bee employed in the building of an hoſpitall, wherein no other diſeaſed perſons ſhould bee receiued but ſuch as were mad and lunaticke, and allowing euery man a large and ample portion to their mainteinance, willed that vpon both the gates of the hoſpitall this poeſie ſhould be ingraued in golden letters, Of mad men I got it, to mad men I leaue it.

The counſell which Coſme de medicis gaue to a certaine officer.

A Certaine man as hee had gotten an office not far from Florence by the mean of Coſme de medicis, demaunded and asked counſell of the ſaid Lord how he were beſt to behaue himſelfe in his place for to keepe himſelfe in authoritie. The lord Coſme gaue him this anſwere, Apparrell thy ſelfe richly, and ſpeake little.

He that ſpeaketh little cannot be reproued of folly, and braue attire encreaſeth reputation.

A bold anſwer which a captain gaue to king Charles the ſeuenth.

A Certaine Captaine being ſent from the campe to Charles the ſeuenth, King of France, for to ſhew vnto him the whole eſtate of the Army, and that for want of victuals, money and other neceſſaries of warre, the Frenchmen had loſt ſome holds, townes and battels, againſt the Engliſhmen. The king willing to vſe ſome priuate familiarity with him, ſhewed him all his daintie fare, delicious prouiſions and furniture, all his paſtimes, his ladies and ſumptuous banquets, and all other ſuch like things wherein he tooke his cheefeſt recreation and felicity. And as hee demaunded how it did like him, the Captaine boldly & without feare gaue him this bold and reſolute anſwere, My ſoueraigne (quoth hee) I neuer ſaw Prince that loſt his owne more pleaſanter then your Maieſtie.

He is very blind that ſporteth when the roofe of his houſe is on fire.

The ſaying of Pope Vrban the fift of that name.

CHarles king of Fraunce willing to void his Realme of all outlandiſh and forrain ſouldiors, who after the contract of peace did ſtraggle and range abroad and liued vpon the ſpoile of the poore Farmers and husbandmen: The lord Bartrand obtained a commiſsion of the king for to lead them into the kingdome of Granada againſt the Turkes and Sarrazins. And as Pope Vrban had excommunicated all this deſperat crue of ſouldiors for their violence and robberies by them committed vnder the name and title of the Great companies, The lord Bartrand being Generall of the Army brought them through Auingnon where Pope Vrban was reſident, who immediately here vpon ſent one of his Cardinals vnto them for to know what was their demand. Vnto whō the lord Bartrand ſaid, Tel our Holy father that theſe men demaund a full pardon, De culpa & poena of all their ſinnes, and cheefly for them which they are now excommunicated for: And beſides fiue thouſand crowns for their conduct money vpon this voyage and iourney, which is to the eſtabliſhment and enlargement of the Chriſtian faith and religion. The Cardinall hauing done this meſſage to the Pope, hee gaue him this anſwere and ſaid: Theſe are a ſtrange kind of people that deſire both mony and abſolution, whereas we are alwaies wont to receiue mony for our pardons and obſolutions.

A worthy ſentence of Solyman the great Turke to Villiars maiſter of Rhodes.

VVHen Villiars grand-maiſter of Rhodes, was forced to yeeld the cittie and Iland of Rhodes vnto Sultan Solyman, and as hee came to the ſaid Prince to compound and agree with him vpon the taking of his leaue for his returne into Chriſtendome, the Turke ſpake a word vnto him anſwereable vnto his greatneſſe & calling. The loſſe of citties, principalities and kingdomes, is a thing ſo common amongſt men, that it onely might ſuffice to teſtifie that wee are all ſubiect to infinite myſeries.

Of Pope Boniface.

POpe Boniface ere he was choſen to bee Pope of Rome, vſed a very ſtrict kind of life, for his ordinary dyet was for the moſt part nothing els but a cruſt of dry bread with a cup of cold water, and in ſteed of a linnen cloth cauſed alwaies his table to be couered with a net. And being demaunded of his friends why he vſed ſo ſober diet, anſwered, that Panis & aqua, was Vita beata. But as hee was now come to the papall dignitie, and as his ſeruants were ready to ſerue him according to his former order, away (quoth he) vnto thē with this kind of diet, for know you not that Aqua & panis, eſt vita canis? And further, ſaid he, ſeeue me with a napkin in ſteed of a net, for now the pray is taken. It is ſaid of this Pope, that he entered as a Foxe, raigned as a lyon, and died as a dogge: for by hypocriſie hee came to that place, behaued himſelfe in his gouernement moſt cruelly, and at laſt was hanged out of a window, and ſo theſe three ſayings were verified.

King Alphonſus anſwere to a prodigall Gentleman.

A Certain Gentleman hauing waſted and ſpent all his ſtock and patrimony vpon the pleaſure of his bodie, and moreouer being greatly indebted to his creditors who did ſue him by law and impriſonment for to come by their owne, his friends came to the king humbly requeſting his highneſſe, that it would pleaſe him to commaund that the Gentleman might not bee moleſted with impriſonment, vnto whome the king made this anſwere 〈…〉 had ſpent his 〈…〉 entertain •• 〈…〉 •• nce of hi • 〈…〉 her 〈…〉 , I 〈…〉 onely, it is great reaſon that his body alſo ſmart for it.

An act of the Dutcheſse of Bourbon.

THe Dutcheſſe of Bourbon hauing in her court a certaine waighting maid, who for loue had forgotten her ſelfe, and ſo was gotten with child: as ſhee was chidden and reprooued for her fault, ſaid to excuſe it and to ſaue her honeſty, that a Gentleman of the houſe had forced and defloured her againſt her will. The Gentleman hereupon being called for to appeare and cleare himſelfe before the ducheſſe, ſhee finding him 〈…〉 ſhould neuer haue fallen into this inconuenience, where you are in at this preſent by your owne fault and folly.

Of King Francis and a Frier.

FRancis the firſt of that name King of Fraunce, as hee was playing at Tennis with a Frier, for whome purpoſely hee had ſent, becauſe his Maieſtie knew him to be a very good and skilfull plaier: as they had plaied together a pretty while, at laſt the Frier tooke a Ball with ſo great a dexterity and ſo good a nimbleneſſe of body that it was not done without great wondring of all the beholders. The king himſelfe ſeeing it, by my truth (quoth hee) moſt brauely done of a Frier. It ſhal be of an Abbot (replied the Frier vpon it) whēſoeuer it ſhal ſeeme good to your grace. The king being thus twice at one time ſurpriſed by a Frier, and the Abbey of Bergomoy being vacant at that preſent, made him for them words (ſo wel and readily ſpoken) Abbot of it.

The ready wit of a Venetian Gentleman.

A Young Lawyer comming before the Senate of Venice for to debate a cauſe and matter in law, partly with fear and partly with ſhame, his tongue vpon the ſuddaine failed him: Many of the aſsiſtants herevpon began to laugh at him. A Gentleman there preſent not vnprouided of a pleaſant reaſon ſaid vnto them, Maruell not ſirs, that his ſpeech thus faileth him, for naturally (as the Philoſophers ſay) man apperceiuing a Wolfe ſuddenly looſeth his ſpeech, and no maruell then if this yong aduocate ſeeing ſo many people in this place is thus ſuddenly taken and tongtied.

The verſes which the Emperor Frederick ſent to the Pope, and the Popes anſwer vpon them. FRedericke Emperour of Germany, vpon his excommunication by the Pope, ſent vnto him theſe verſes. Roma diu totubans varijs erroribus acta Corruet & mundi deſinet eſſe caput. The Popes anſwere. Niteris incaſſum nauem ſubmergere Petri: Fluctuat, at nunquā mergitur illa ratis. The Emperour. Fata volūt, ſtella que docent, auuim que volatus Quod Fredericus ego malleus orbis ero. The Pope. Fata volūt, ſcriptura docet, peccata loqūtur Quod tibi vita breuis, poena perrēnis erit.

The Emperour being at laſt reconciled againe, and comming to Rome to ſubmit himſelfe to the Pope, as hee was thither arriued and did humble himſelfe at his feete, the Pope moſt arrogantlie treading vpon the Emperours ſhoulders, and vſing theſe ſpeeches vnto him, Super aſpidem & Baſiliſcum ambulabis & non inficient calceaneum pedis tui. The Emperour moued at this extreame pride, ſaid to the Pope againe, Non tibi, ſed Petro. The Pope moſt preſumptuouſly anſwered vnto it againe, Et mihi & Petro, and ſo diſmiſſed the Emperour.

An act of a Duke of Sauoy.

PEter Duke of Sauoy as hee went to the Emperour Otto the fourth, for to giue him thankes for his lands which hee had reſtored againe vnto him, attired himſelfe in a coat halfe of male and halfe of tiſſue. The Emperour demaunding him why hee did weare ſo ſtraunge and diſguiſed a cote of tiſſue and halfe of male, anſwered that hee did weare the cloth of gold on his right ſide for to honour therewith his Maieſtie. And as touching my left ſide (quoth hee) it ſignifieth that if any man ſeeketh to wrong or iniury mee I am ready to anſwere him in anie place, and defend my ſelfe as long as a drop of blood ſhall bee remaining within mee.

The anſwere which the Emperour Maximilian gaue to him that ſued vnto him for to be a gentleman.

THe Emperour Maximilian as he was at Bologne, a certaine Cittizen of that place being of no gentilitie, otherwiſe very rich of ſubſtance and poſſeſsions, came to the Emperour and deſired his grace that it would pleaſe him for to make him a Gentleman, ſaying that hee had wealth ynough to maintaine the ſtate of it. The Emperour anſwered him, ſaying. I can make thee (my friend) farre richer then thou art, but I am not able to make thee a Gentleman, for vnto this degree of honour thou muſt attaine either by thine own or els thy anceſtors vertue and valiantneſſe.

VICTVS ET CVLTVS ratio expoſita quatuor in ſingulos menſes Verſibus, Per Ioachimum Camerarium. JANVARIVS. MEnſis amat tepido ianidocurrcre victu, Et refici grato ſaepe liquore iubet. Vena tibi nullos exudet ſecta cruores Sed calida fas est mergere corpus aqua. FEBRVARIVS. Februae olus, volucreſque cibis odere paluſtres Eſseque inertifica Febre timenda ſolent. Pharmaca tunc hauri tunc ſcinde in pollice venam Et calido multum flumine membra foue. MARTIVS. Martius humores & terrae & corporis auget, Tunc ratio eſt pari magna tuenda cibi Dulcia tunc proſunt acri condita ſapore. Pharmaca non proſunt venam aperire nocet. APRILIS. Frigore vim lente reuocat telluris. Aprilis, Tunc etiam eſt tenuis perque forata cutis. Tunc intus ſunt aucta magis ſuntque omnia plena Soluere ſe venter, vena apperire iubet. MAIVS. Omnia iam florènt iam formoſiſsimus annus Jamque ſibi cuncti mollius eſſe volunt. Balnea nunc cole, nunc ſit pharmaca ſumere cura Et tibi nunc miſso ſanguine vena fluat. JVNIVS. Iunius & gaudet gelidis & paſcitur herbis Viuifico humori tunc inimica fuge. Laetitià & recreet tunc mentem blanda voluptas Affligat corpus nec medicina tuum. IVLIVS. Aeris ignufluos intendit Iulius aeſtus Hoc brcuior ſomno tempore danda quies Balnea vitentur nec venam tangere ferro Nec dominae petulans accubuiſse velis. AVGVSTVS. Ipſe etiam Augustus ſomnum reſtringit & eſcas Et veneris cupidos gaudia ferre vetat. Pharmaca nemo bibat laceret neque corpora ferro Nec gelidas intra delicietur aquas. SEPTEMBER. Poma dat & gratos September ab arbore fructus Tunc etiam preſso paſcere lacte caprae. Phaermaca nil prohibet tunc ſumere, ſcindere venam, Nec tuus externum vitet aroma cibus. OCTOBER. Octobri offertur venatio viua, volucres: Vtere, nec dubites non tenuiſſe modum. Sic tamen vt ne oneres nimio praecordia victu. Cumque modo ſtudeas non tenuiſſe modum. NOVEMBER. Eſſe ſalutaris perbibetur Mulſa Nouembri Gingiber & dulci fiſſile melle natans. Tum neque ſaepe laues, veneris neque ſacra frequentes, Ante ſenex tempus ne videare ſuum. DECEMBER. Juxta menſe focum calidis vtare Decembri. Tunc iaceant menſis gramina nulla tuis. Incidas capitis defenſi à frigore venam, Cinnameoque tuus fragret odore calix.
De ratione victus ſalutaris poſt inciſam venam & emiſſum ſanguinem ad Armatum Epigramma Anaſtaſij. VEnam Armate tibi medici incidêre, timenti Neſcio ventriculi qualia damna mali. Nunc quo vita modo fuſo peragenda cruore Sitque dieta tibi qualis habenda, rogas: Illi morborum dicant Armate, periti Haec non est nostra falce metenda ſeges. Non m • ſſum facis & cupio ex te audire diſerti Atque aliquid tua quod Pieris ornet, ais. Accipe qua idoquidem nugas ad ſeria ducis, Quae facias octo verſibus octo dies. Prima • aena die ſit miſſo ſanguine parca: Lux abeat laetis aucta ſecunda modis Tertia ſed placidae debetur tota quieti: Quarta & quinta ſibi mollius eſſe volant. Balnea ſexta petit: mox ſeptima colligit auras Fertque vagos circumrura nemuſque pedes. Octaua amplexus dilectae coniugis, & quae Ante fuit, vitam reſtituiſſe ſolet. FINIS.