A Potion for an Apothecary, Or, The Apothecaryes portion,

This ditty doth Concern a matter Rare,
Ther's few or none may with the same Compare,
It may be term'd a Net, a Snare, or Iin
That's only set to catch young Wood-cocks in
Then let no silly bird here at be Ieering,
Forwhen 'tis Sung you'l say 'tis worth the hearing.
To the tune of, Old flesh.
[figure]
OF a gallant Apothecary
a story I will tell,
His carriage and behaviour
and what of him befell:
He was no silly Coxcomb
nor he was no Country clown,
But he lived in famous London,
a place of high renowne,
He was active in his practise,
and skillfull of his trade,
And some women did suppose him
to be a Bil-bow-blade,
He was witty in his speeches
and of qualities most rare,
Yet he like to a Wood-cock
was caught at unaware.
This brave young Pothecary
he lived void of strife,
He stood in néed of nothing,
but he wanted a rich wife:
And for that only purpose
he many plots have laid
To marry with some rich Widow:
or some wealthy Country Maid,
His pate it was more subtile
then any crafty Fox
But in the last conclusion
he was her [...]d like an Oxe;
Now marke what followed after,
and you shall quickly heare.
How he like to a Wood-cock
was caught at vn-aware.
A Punck that liv'd in London
which had of wealth to store,
For all that she had got was
by playing of the Whore
She like a cunning Gypsie,
consulted with her Baud
This brave Apothecary
to cozen and defraud:
Like a brave young Gentlewoman
that was in the Country borne
In habit and attire
she did her selfe adorne
Her Baud like to a servant,
did waite as may appeare,
And they caught the witty Wood-cock,
before he was aware.
And being so provided,
as true reports have said,
The Punck she was the Mistrisse,
and the Baud her waiting Maid,
They then tooke up their lodging
as it is known full well
Neere to the very place where
this brave young spark did dwell,
The mistris fain'd her selfe
to be sick with cold and Tissick
And sent to the Pothecary
cause he should give her Physick,
Who every day imployd her
with Pils, and such like geare,
But he like to a Wood-cock,
was caught at vn-aware.
The Apothecary often,
to the Gentlewoman came,
Who beholding of her favour,
saw she was a handsome dame,
His heart within his belly,
with love was set on fire
But he knew not how nor which way
to compasse his desire:
And therefore in close secret,
to the Maid he told his mind,
Desiring of her favour
that she would be so kind
To speake a good word for him,
unto her Mistris deare,
And he would well reward her
as you shall after heare.
The Maid reply'd unto him,
there is no way to win her,
Vnlesse you doe invite her,
on Sunday next to dinner:
Whereby to make her merry,
and cast away all care
And feast her corps with Iunkets
with Wine and with good Chéere
And when you all are frolick,
I will a question move
So that you thereby may know
whither she will hate or love:
These words of hers o'r joy'd him,
as it doth well appeare,
And at last the witty Wood-cock,
was caught in his own snare.
A dinner was provided
at the appointed day
And the Gentlewoman sent for
who came without delay,
In all her gay apparell
in such a stately manner
As if she were a Lady
with her Maid to waite upon her;
And being sat at dinner
in all her gallant bravery
The youngman nere mistrusted
of any poynt of knavery:
They eate, drank, and were merry
having plenty of good cheere
But that same Sundaies dinner
cost the Apothecary deare.
Whilst they were inmidst of pleasure
a man that was but poore,
Came on a hasty message,
and knocked at the doore
He brought with him a Letter
forth of the Country
Which to the Gentlewoman
must needs delivered be
When as she had received it
the messenger she paid
And gave the Apothecary
the letter for to read
Which letter prov'd his baine
as you presently shall heare
And how this witty Wood-cock
was caught in his own snare.

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The words that were written in the counterfeit Letter, as if they came from her Brother out of the Country were as followeth.

SWéet Sister I desire you
to be patient and content,
Though I this dolefull Letter
and Messenger have sent
Whereby to give you notice
your Father's dead and gone,
And how he hath bestowed
his Goods to every one
Of us that are his Children.
which doth alive remaine,
Note well what here is set down,
the case is very plaine:
He hath made me his Executor,
as you may understand,
And I am in possesion
of all my Fathers Land.
To my second Brother Henry
a Farm he did give.
Which is enough to maintain him
and his whilst he doth live,
And to my Brother Edward,
as plainly may appeare,
He gave him for continuance
two hundred pound a Yeare:
And you have for your Portion
of Silver and of Gold.
Fiftéen hundred pound of Money
as good as e're was told:
Wherefore I pray good Sister
come home and take your own,
That ones part from another
amongst us may be known.
Your Loving Brother,
When as this Gentle-woman
had heard the Letter read.
How that her aged Father
was dead and buried,
She sighed and she sobbed,
she wept and made great moan
Her maid that waited on her
fetcht many a heavy groan:
The Apothecary séeing such
floods of sorrowes rise,
Like a kind hen-hearted coxcomb,
the teares fell from his eyes,
Now mark the last conclusion,
and you shall quickly heare,
How that this witty Wood-cock
was caught at un-aware.
When sorrowes were past over,
and mirth did fresh revive,
They that were almost kild then
became to be alive,
The Apothecary having
a plodding cunning pate,
He thought for to be doing
before it was too late:
If he could wed the woman,
these were his antick fetches,
He was sure for to be Master
of all her Gold and Riches:
And therewithall he wood her,
without all wit or feare,
And so this witlesse Wood-cock
was caught in his owne snare.
But to be briefe in plain termes;
the matter so was carryed,
That they agréed together,
and suddenly were married.
And for a little season
they lived frée from strife,
For she likt well of her Husband
and he likt of his Wife:
But in a short time after
strange matters came to passe,
And a sudden alteration
betwixt this couple was,
He married her for lucre
of riches as you heare,
And so the simple Wood-cock
was caught in his own snare.
When they had liv'd together
thrée wéeks or something moe,
This Gallant did provide
i'th Country for to goe,
To sée his wivs best friend there,
that was his chiefest motion,
And to receive the mony which
was left her for her portion:
And for his solid Iourny
so well he did provide,
He bought new Boots & borrowed
a Horse whereon to ride,
A Sword & Horse-mans-Coat too
he borrowed as I heare,
And so into the Country he
rid without wit or feare.
And thinking that his Wife had,
bin honest, true, and just,
Al that which was his own Goods
with her he left in trust,
so he comming to the place where
his brother in law should dwel,
Of such a manner of person there
was never a one could tell:
And as for the old man which
was said to be dead and gone,
In all the Parish over of
that name was never a one:
Wherefore he back returned
to London as I heare,
With a purse that held no mony,
and a heart fil'd ful of care.
But when he came to London
no Wife that he could find,
Which was a greater crosse,
and a trouble to his mind,
For she was run away with
the Baud which she cal'd her maid,
And with a Pimp of hers
which their heads together laid.
Wherefore the Apothecary
in rage most déepely swore,
That he was basely cozed by
an old Baud & a young Whore:
And now his fellow Neighbors
doth at him scoffe and jéere,
'Cause he like to a VVoodcock
was caught at un-aware.
You Widowers and Batchelors
if single men you be,
Be warn'd by the Apothecary
and be rul'd awhile by me.
Chuse a Wife that's truly honest
though she be ne're so poore,
'Tis better then a rich Wife, if
she love to play the Whore:
The Lord wil give a blessing
to Truth and Honesty,
when théevs, whores, bauds & pan­ders
may at Tyborn chance to dye.
Be heedfull in your chusing,
and have a speciall care,
Lest like to silly Wood-cocks you
be caught at un-aware.

London Printed for Tho. Vere.

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