IT is a sorry Town, shituate in a good aire, naturally bounded with Bumsteed downs on the East, and Arsteed on the South, the rest lyes open like a bare Buttock to be lasht by the Describer of it. The Heath or Common where the Well stands cannot but be a blustring place, the wind blowing from so many corners at once; Tis naturally barren, but being well dung'd it causeth it in great abundance to produce divers Drug's and Vegetatives, as Arsnick, Assa faetida, Water-creasses, and Scurvy grass. There are few Nettles to be found, but many Dock's, resembling Mushrooms, only these shoot up in a night and the other shite up in the morning. The Well it self represents some great Farm house having so many fair back-sides belonging to it. The Trees that will grow there are such as bear your Pistaccoes, and Medlers, commonly called Open-arses. The Birds that frequent it, are the Bunting, the Thrush in Latin called Turdus, and the Water-Wagtails; as for the Rookes they hover about the Bowling-green in the Town. The Heath or Common on which the Well stands, is a place contra di stinkt to Hide-Park, for here many secrets are disclosed. Concerning the virtues of the water they are many, it makes the women that drink it to be Malecontented: and many men that drink it, to have such a swimming in their heads that they take other men's wives for their own. How quiet soever this water is in the well being drunk it makes its way throw many sore Breeches of the body. Being drunk in the morning it will produce a Quiddiny of what-soever you did eat over night, here is the true Elixar Proprietatatis to be had of every ones own making. The strength of this water you may judge of by making the stoutest gallants of both Sexes to couch, it being of a stoopifying nature. No fish, they say, will live in this water but Smelts. Let people come never so well quallified and sober to drink this water it will make them loose in a few hours. Yet how loose soever the drinkers of this water are, hither the Nonconformists come squirting, this water makes them Conformists, to conforme to the old way of evacuation, nay, to cringe and to bow, yea to do reverence in the place. And this they doe with the more confidence because there is none there that can tell tails they are so many. When the water drinkers are in a Body on the Common as sometimes they are postur'd you would take them to be the Representatives of the Rump Parliament. How different so ever they are in their judge­ments they meet there with one Consent. There are none idle there, but all at their Business. The Souldier he is presenting, and giving fire. The Phisician casting of his Water, the Apothcary at his Clister, the Lawyer waiting for his motion, the Archer nock­ing of his Arrows; the Gramarian at his Ars in presenti, the Musitian at his strain, but none of the sweetest, the Mathematician erecting his Teliscope, the Seaman cleansing his Scupper hole; so that you would take it for a kind of Cacademy. There Men play at back Gammon with­out Tables, and Women at Beast without Cards. And as the silly Bustard, as Stinkfeildius saith, thinks if his head be hid in a bush or brake, his whole body is invisible too, thus these wa­ter drinkers, so their Tayles be hid they care not if their heads, and all the rest of their bodies be seen. Here two distant times or seasons of the year do meet in a moment or minute, the Spring and the Fall; for they no sooner duck down, but they are up againe. There, though a mixt company they are not confus'd for they go in rank, and file, or dine quis que suo, every one in his or­dure. None can lose his friend long there, for 'tis but following his nose, and he'l be sure to find him: one thing there to be admir'd is this that piece of ground that look's green this mo­ment is all turd the next. One would think the Town of Epsam should be a very rich place for no Citizen comes there but he leaves somewhat like gold behind him. Take the Town entire­ly together and you would think it some strange beast, or monster having such a devouring MAW in it. To draw to a Conclusion, for the more we stirr, the more we shall stink in this business. Epsam, is a place to take the air in.