WJT'S PROGRESSE:

Wherein are launc't the various crimes,
Are incident to these sad times.
Chapmen quickly come and buy me,
Jf y' are wise, youle not deny me.
Wit is cheapned, wit is sought,
But wits neare good till it be bought.

The Author Democritus Junior.

Printed in the yeare, 1647.

Wit's Progresse.

I Have not (as the Phylosopher of old did) wandred up and downe Athens, with a candle and lanthorne at noone day, to finde out an honest man, (as if his in­tention had bin to add light & splendor to the glorious eye of heavē, that was a little to cynical; my purpose hath been more charita­ble, yet trust me in these times, I think it a kind of an herculean labour; every man I meet with cries out of the badnesse of the times, when most men have a hand in making them as they are.

Let every man begin his own worke, and correct his own errors, and we shall quickly find an alteration in the amendment of the times.

First to begin with the geat Physitians of the body politque (who have almost served a prentiship in finding out a cure) they per­swading themselves that she was sicke of a [Page 2]Plethora, strook a veine, but let her bleed to much, but I am confident by succeeding passages, they willingly mistooke the right veine, and so drew some of her vitalls, by which meanes she hath thus long laboured with a consumption. And the reason may be thus, they dealt with her (as the Empericks of this age deale with their patients, whom they finde to be rich and able they procrasti­nate their cure from day to day, untill they have drawn their patients purse as empty of crownes, as their bodies of humours, of both so much as the party hardly ever recovers.

I do not say it is thus, my fears, and the Kingdomes (especially of the honester part) have to much reason to suspect it.

Thus having glanc't superficially upon the body of the Common-wealth, and the dangerous estate she now continues in, let me reflect upon the religious part (the soule which is religion) this hath been purged off her leggs too; this, this glorious worke, the structure of many ages, falling into the hand of doating ignorance, is utterly throwne to the ground, and there lyes panting for [Page 3]breath. They have dealt with her (like ig­norant artises) into whose hands, some curi­ous clock, or watch, hath accidentally fallen, who to observe the curiosity of the worke­manship have taken it to pieces, but are in a labyrinth of errour: not knowing which way to set it together again.

There is another sort who serve as an Ap­pendix to this Reformation, whom we may stile the corn-cutters of Religion, or the Lee­ches of the Common-wealth (I meane Countrey Committees) these have a hand dyde deepe in the purple gore of the King­dom, under pretence of doing good too.

I shall give you a story in Worcester, there was not long since a large heape of stones, which suffered under the hated appellation of the crosse (though otherwise an indigest­ed heap of stones, which age had made de­crepit, and worne out of form; this poore crosse, for so they stil'd it, was arraigned and condemned to perpetuall They have built a gate to the pri­son with the st [...]n [...] to keep in hones­ter men thē they keep out. imprisonment, before ever it was permitted to speak a word for it selfe, and could their faith have flowne steeple hight, the poore cross which supports [Page 4]the Weathercocke had suffered Martyrdom with her sister; but thanks to providence for placing it out of their reach: but you may see they had a notable stomach to it by their They dealt with the lit­tle Crosses upon the battlements as Surgeons do with burnt — pared off their heads and left the stumps stan­ding only. nibling at the battlements. This poore structure which hath stood long in spight of rough Boreas blasts, was over­throwne by the poysonous breath of a bum­kin Committee.

There is an old saying that three Taylors goe to the making of a man, I am confident that three times three, (if they are no better then some I have known) and a whole coun­try Committee will scarce make an honest man. Some there are amongst them whoe have a graine of honesty more then others, who serve as Gingerbread to stuffe up the Fayre, whom want of meanes, or wit, or both, hath drawne into the croud; but let them passe, whilst I steere to the City, (the grand magazine of all folly) there is not such a Fayre in Europe for all pedlers of Religion to sell off their fantastick toyes in. Let them set up what standings they will, no body contradicts them, and the good easy soft [Page 5]hearted Women fall back to them let their Comodities be what they will; there is such a rutting at these private meeetings and con­venticles, that (I am confident) he that is not a Cuckold or a bastard amongst them is a strangly happy man. Certainly the people of this Island are growne very deafe in these latter yeares, they delight so in noise; for un­lesse their pulpit thumping Ministers can out of their sweating zeale, wast 2 houres sand in rayling against royall Government, in a tone would deafe Marriners in a storm, he is not a man thought fit to goe in and out be­fore the Sisters.

Laerna hath not so many Monsters nor Hydra heads, as there are of these theating imposters in every corner and nooke of the the City. These are stipendiaries to the good women, if they are found to be able Men. Strange impudency! when Religion is made but a cloake, to hide baudry! I could wish some other climate, distant far enough had these hellish monsters, but that I would not name Derricke, because he is a good Com­mon-wealths-man. [Page 6]And since I know it to be the custome of England to goe singing from the Gal­lowes to the grave, in hopes they will mend before they end, I have penned their Recantation.

From the tyrany of the Turke and the Antichristian Pope,
From all traytors in England that deserve a rope,
Give them but halter and theyle hang themselves we hope.
Good Dericke deliver us.
From the giddy Crow whose cheife intent,
Is to subvert the Church and Royall Government,
From a bumkin Committee, and an everlasting Parliament.
Good, &c.
From a Sisters nunquam satis and all private Conventi [...]les.
Where a man shall labour till the sweat downe trickles,
A game they love better then they love their victuals,
Good &c,
FJNJS

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