Strange & true Nevves FROM Jack-a-Newberries Six Windmills: OR THE Crafty, impudent, Common-Whore (turnd Bawd) Anatomised, And discovered, in the unparralleld Practises of Mris Fotheringham, her whores, Hectors and Rumpers, in their manner of living, and erecting a Half-Crown CHUCK-OFFICE.

With five and twenty Orders agreed on by consent of Mris Creswell, Betty Lawrence, Mris Curtis, Mris Smith, Mris Bagley, Mris Russel, Mris Diamond, Kate Hare, Jane Stamford, Pegg Williams, Mris Frances: Betty Garret, with divers others for establishing thereof.

Published by way of admonition to all persons to beware of that House of darkness, and Caution to some how they frequent it for the future, lest their names be rendred in Capitalls, of whem there is a large Cata­logue.

BY PETER ARETINE Cardinall of ROME.

VNUS, Printed for Rodeticus a Castro, 1660.

THE OBSERVATIONS AND ORDERS of the Half Crown Chuck-Office lately invented and errected by Mrs. Fotheringham and her Society.

AMongst all the Readings, reports and observations of the Lives manners, and customs of the stately Spanish Dames French, Madam and Venetian Curtesans, I have never heard read or met with such an impudent, and unparallel'd piece of Iniquity, as this Mrs. Fotheringham living at the sign of the Six Windmills in the upper fields, formerly called Jack-a-Newberry, till the fruits of some abominable practices compelled them to take him down for fear of the multitude, and Hood-wink their Cullies, as if the Alteration of the sign, had changed the natures of the Vultures, Har­pyes and loose livers within, whereby, they grew more crafty every day then other and got wealth, and rich gifts out of other mens ruins making themselves, but undoing many Families and Prentices, who dayly visit them, for want of being lookt after and being discouraged in such unlawful living, so that it may truely and justly be said of that House, that it hath undone (and continues so doing) more Yongsters then half the houses in the City of London.

This crafty Whore having stoln and pickt up what monies and good she could of her husbands run away with her Cum-rogue a sword Cu [...] [Page] [...] Church, and spent on [...] with what­ever he had, which being done necessity compells them to part, and she to her husband return, (for sine Carere et Baccho Friget Venus) who sent her to study mischief in Newgate during Eleven or twelve Moneths, in which time, by advice of her fellow Collegiates, a strong memory and naural endowments (like good wine in bad vessels) she grew up a most exquisite Whore and an incredible profiicent for all manner of Bawdery and Roguery.

And upon her departure thence (being terribly Pepered with the French pox,) she was received by the contented Cuckold her husband and re-settl'd in a higher, Orbe, leaving the trade of Whoring to play the Bawd, in the practice and proficiency whereof she hath out-done and out-stript the oldest Beldam in mans memory, so that finding her self over grown with Age, over-worn with her former and too frequent embraces and desperately be-french'd, (all nauseating Arguments and loathsom provocations to Lechery) she discords her former trade, as­signing it (with the fruits thereof) to such as she has rarely educated in her School of bad manners, onely reserving the Benefit of her Chuck office during her life time and calling a Courcil of Hectors, Whores and Rumpers with the Assistance of Betty Laurence, Mystris Curtes, Mrs. Smith, Kate Hare, Mrs. Creswell, Mrs. Bagley, with several others these following orders were agreed on and signed by con­sent of this whole Council met at the Chuck office.

The Orders.

Ordered that an Oath of Renuntiation be given to all Whores Hectors, Trappans and Rumpers belonging to the newly erected and lately invented Chuck office by Mrs. Fotheringham Governess there­of.

Ordered at a full meeting that one of the she Society do stand upon their heads (as the Governess may do and did too) with all their cloathes and smock about their ears bare breeches to the cold wall (like Mon­sters) leggs spread at large with the door of their Chuck office open, because that fashion was lately invented by Mrs. Fotheringham for her Cully-Rumpers to chuck half crown's in.

Ordered that all our Hectors, Trappans, and Rumpers do see the said Vote put in execution, and upon information of default by any of the Society therem, he shall have free leave and order from this Coun­cill to exercise his gifts and parts where, and on whom he pleases, but upon neglect thereof, to have his stones cut off, and thrown out by the whole Society as an useless member amongst them.

Ordered that it shall be lawful for such as enter themselves into our community to have free leave (without being questioned for the fact) to pick any mans pockets either of gold, silver, Rings or watches, if he put his hands in their plackets.

Ordered that all Night-walkers, Mobbs, and wandring whores, such as Mrs. Diamond whose nose lies flat, Jane Stamford who has had the pox ore and ore, Pegg Williams the Trappanner, Mrs. Simplon, &c. which shall freely enter themselves into this company receive an equal benefit of these orders as if present at the voting thereof.

Ordered that who-so-ever brings in a strange Rumper she put him to all expences possible (although they be of the Custom-house) and drink Ale in black pots would poison a Toad, but cry it up for good, cause 'tis for our benefit, take three small pimping, stinking pipes of Aranoco Tobacco, steept in pisse for two pence expect no more then a pint of Mallago sack for two shillings, never venture a knock under half a crown if it can be gotten though a feeling for nothing.

Ordered that no one of our Society be left in Pawn of as a pledge for the reckoning on pain of leaving their Petti-coats but make her Dick pit his Cloak if he want money without any soruple of Con­science.

Ordered (after agreement and receit of their Bargain before hand, for it is no trusting in this case) no one of this Society refuse to do the deed of nature either backwards or any other of Peter Aretines postures so song as shee's pay'd for't.

Ordered that clean smocks be in request and alwayes ready though the Rump be rotten, and that no one scruple the giving the Pox (in re­gard of our great charge of Barber Chirugeons whose benefit may thereby be augmented) on pain of damnation from the whole Coun­cill.

Ordered that such officers as are in continual play and stand at the receit of custom be employed before any other belonging thereunto and that they attend to do druggery as constant and as free as a com­mon house of office.

Ordered that such as pick their Rumpers pockets when they be drunk deny it to them when they are sober for the credit of our good-old-cause.

Ordered that this extraordinary society be exquisite at putting of cushions under their coats causing their Cullie to believe they are with child, and not to take under ten pound to discharge them thereof, and have free leave to serve a dozen so one after another paying five shillings in the pound for continuing the revenues of our said chuck office.

Ordered that no Hectors but our own be made use of in Hecking and Trappanning of mony or Bonds for the discharge of such as are [...]atch napping (napping (under pretence of being their wives (though common Whores) allowing them two shillings in the pound and free Quarter (without denyal) all weathers.

Ordered that all those that belong to this office and are entred in the same chuse no other sporting place but the 6 Wind-mills for their Head-quarte [...]s and constant Rendezvouz and that such of our retainers that chance to be infected with the French Pox be cured thereof at the proper charge of the common stock without the help of an Hos­pitall.

Ordered, and be it so, That a Nose of Wax be provided for the Go­verness at the care and cost of the publick Revenue, in ease her Nose should drop off this Summer it being in afair way already, as her Barber Surgion can tell since her dressing on Saturday last, which is caused, and like to be effected, by standing too much on her head, if it do not by his ignorance in fluxing and plaistring.

Ordered, That whosoever gives the Running of the Reins, shall have half a Crown for the good service done the Surgions of our said Office, and for the P— Betty Lawrence, is commanded (as Treasu­rer) to pay five shillings to the party deserving it, and to Register it in upon account, to whom it is paid, and how, and to what end and pur­pose.

Ordered, That none of this Society discover the Manners and Cu­stomes to any but the Society, for fear of the Shrove-Tuesday Boys, (the grand enemies to our thriving) on pain of having their water­gapet stop'd, and their A— sew'd up by consent of a General Council of their own Society.

Ordered, That those fools which spend their Estates or their Masters amongst us, and afterwards come hither without mony, have no more respect then a Sr. Reverence, and be kick'd out of our company as un­profitable Customers.

Ordered, That all Drapers-men, Silkmen, Mercers men, and Milli­ners men, receive the favour and seeming curtesie from this society that can be (though they have no mony) so long as they bring along with Scarfs, Hoods, Gowns or Peticoats, and work them out upon our ten­der Bodies.

Ordered that two Books entituled, The night S [...]arch, and the Craf­ty Whore, be brought into this Office, and examined, to know what may be useful therein to train up the younger sort, and be taken notice of so as to make the older sort more exquisite, all others to be voted de­structive to our Principles, if ver [...]uous and prohibited the use there­of.

Ordered, That none of this society, whether Citizens, Seamens, or Country-Gentlemans Wife, Widdow or unmarried person, have any appearance, of modesty in them, (a thing clean contrary to our profit and interest) but instead thereof, do make her Cully hold the Chamber­pot whilst she makes it roar, and be sure to know what Ware he car­ries again and again, because it is good to be sure.

Ordered, That when a rich Citizen enquires for a young Countrey Lasse, there be no scruple made of couzening him with a Common Jade, the mannagement thereof being left wholly in the will and plea­sure of the Governesse, whose care is to do Justice (as tis with Hack­ney Horses) by causing them to take it by turns, but for a Country gen­tle-woman who is as easily cozen'd with our Society as of his Coin, be careful to leave him as bare as a Birds. A— for if once gone, he will never visit us again.

Ordered, that (if it be their desire) the principal beauties of our said Chuck-Office, have their Pictures drawn forth by our Limner (as well as their Faces) and hanged in order one after another, according to their Merits.

Be it likewise ordered, that no one shall publish these our Orders but our only beloved Patron and singular Tutor Peter Aretine, not shall presume to print or put them to sale, but our beloved Brother Rodericus e Castro.

Ordered, That Betty Laurence be chief Clerk to this Committee, who is best acquainted with the Orders of the House, and will see them put in Execution to a hairs Broadth.

Betty Lawrence Clerk to the Half-Crown Chuck-Office.

After these Orders had been read three times they passt the Council [...]emine contradicente, as useful and necessary to the support of their de­clining Trade, of which I have been careful and exact to communicate to such as think fit to beware of this Den of Whores, whofe actions you will find exactly composd according to their Orders, but best to be ig­norant of. Therefore for you Mr. N— Merchant, Mr. R— Grocer, Mr. T— Mercer, Mr. H— Silkman, Mr. W— Haberdasher, for­bear their society, or else I shall publish your names in Capitals, leaving [...]his precious Governess with her Council to the Shrove-tuesday boyes, who no question will do it them, if a Total rout be not executed beforehand.

FINIS.

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