IN the name of Rebellion, Blood, Fury, and Horror, I Thomas Fairfax, Generall of the Army, now lying neere Colchester, rai­sed for the Destruction of his Majesties Person, the known Lawes of the Land, the Liberty of the Subject, and the priviledge of Parli­aments, being at this time in a very sick and weak estate, of a Disease called the Gowt, which some call Scabiae Franciae, others Morbus Gallicus, and some Mechanicks the French Pocks, but especially of the Disease called the Generall Revolt of the People from the Traey­tors at Westminster, and for that the Earle of Norwich, the Lord Capell, and Sir Charles Lucas, my sworne Doctors, have given out that I must not live long, being gone past hope of recovery, I there­fore hold it expedient to make this my last Will and Testament, in manner and form following:

Jmprimis. I give and bequeath my body to some dunghill, or to the City Common shore, that my name (if it were possible) might perish from the earth, and my infamie, cease among men, my Soul I give to be disposed of at the pleasures of that once glorious Angel, now the King of Gehenna, who fell from heaven like lightning▪ the sole Patron of me and my Faction, Lucifer, well knowing that by him, I shall be courteously intrea­ted, and that hee will remember our former friendship, so that where others are washt over head and eares in gulphes of liquid fire, I shall but Tantalize in yee, and exchange the Torrid, for the Frozen Zone.

Item, I give and bequeath my Commission (since I beleeve the Saints under my command must needs have one of eminent base­nesse, and known wickednesse to goe in and out before them) to my dear brother the Earl of Denbigh, whom I know to be a man sufficiently quallified for the worke, whose very breath is as conta­gious as the Pestilence, who with the toade sucks poyson out of the most clearest fountaines, and whose face is as ominous as a Basa­lisk, whose heart continually grates it self it with envy, and fights with his gall for mastery, which is the reason of that roade-poole setled in his face, hee is the man whom I appoynt the Champion of Israel after my disease, to fight the battailes of the Lord.

Jtem, I give and bequeath my perjury, and treacheries, when I delivered the King my master into the hands of Whaley, at Hampton court, and permitted Cromwel▪ by a wile to be guilty of his own ruin, by flying to the Isle of Wight, notwithstanding I and Nel had solemnly sworne to him at New-market, and at St. Al­bones that we woul procrue a present Personall Treaty, and restore him to his lost greatnesse, I say I bequeath that my perjury, and disloyalty to the peculiar use of the crew at Westminster, whom ve­rily I now hate, for that they suffer mee to lye here, where I am each day buffeted by perpetuall sallies, my army each day wasted, and those that survive being in dread of Sir Marmaduke Langdales approach upon their backs, and so to be pounded to their destru­ction, and yet they send me no supplyes (it seemes they are busy in packing up their goods for their journey) either of men or money, wishing them to adde it to all their former perjuries and Treacheries, for Ile assure them, that the Projection of mee, and Cromwel for the cleanly conveyance of his Majesties Person into the Isle of Wight, may stand upon record for the most pernicious fallacy that ever hole instruments invented, and that cursed Plot, if [Page 3] well husbanded, may procreate a thousand more, as pernitious as that hath proved, and as equally dangerous.

Item, I give and bequeath, six pounds per annum to be paid out of Delinquents estates not yet discovered, to lack Hall, (the may-game of Cambridge) who each weeke proclaymes himself in a sheet of nonsence, blasphemye, and treason, by the name of the the quondam Libeller Britain [...]cu [...], which annuity I bestow on him to quit his charges for pen, inke, and paper: for his maintenance I leave that to Lillie and Booker the infortunates of the State, whose, hireling hee is, and who allow him money, for tobacco and beere-besides a sundayes dinnir, of beefe and pudding, to raile against Elenctichus, and the Scots.

Item, I give and bequeath the sum of one hundred pounds, to be paid out of mine own estate, to Mr. Marshall that Geneva bull as a gratuity for his paines, when he shall preach my funerall ser­mon, which I would have him prate, in S. Margarits church West­minster, his auditory I would have to be these whom I nominate, Imprimis. Harry Martin, Mr. Weaver, and Mr. Scot: of com­mittee men, Corbet the swarthy, and Challenor the wall-eyd▪ of citi­zens, Warner the Mayor, and Atkins the Alderman, of the Army, Ireton the Anabaptist, and Rainsborow the leveller, of the Lords Say the sychophant, and Manchester the man-cater: his text I would have to be, even where himselfe listeth, for the truth is, I am not so well read in holy scripture, as to remember any place pertinent to the purpose, his Sermon finished, let my body be decently wound up, in the Ordinance of Indemnity, (for perchance it may purchase me some favour amongst my fellow-furies in hell, though (should I live) it could not mittigate my censure and punishment on earth, that done my body to born with all solemnity, and cast into the o­pen fields, for the fowles of the ayre to feast upon me (if perhaps they flie mee not for the sowrenesse of my flesh,) and for that I am like to have no tombe, I desire that this Epitaph may be entred in­to the Iournall booke of the crew at Westminster, but withall I leave it to the discretion of Brittannicus, to frame another more plausible if he find occasion.

The last will and Testament of the Army.

[...]N the [...]me of mischief, murther, massacres, and Ruine, Amen. WEe who tearme our selves an Army of Saints, commonly knowne by the name of murtherers, plunderers, Blasphe­mers, Atheists, and out-throates, now lying before the Towne of Colchester, where we are continually kept waking with loud al­lar [...]s, and hundreds of us each day out off by furious Sallies, being in a very sick and weak estate, and certainly assured that we can­not be long mortall, do make this our last Will and Testament, in manner and form following:

Imprimis. Wee give our bodies, to be devoured by crowes, pies, rav [...]ns, and shrich-owles, and the other animals of the ayre, so soon as ever our Soules shall be sent packing by the swords of the Earl of Norwich, the Lord Capell, Sir Charles Lueas, Sir Marmaduke Langdale, and the rest of the eminent Royallists, and their adhe­rents, now in armes against us.

Jtem. Wee give and bequeath all our plunders▪ rapines, cruel­ties, and abominations which we have practised this seven years, to Scot, Manchester, Say, Warner, Wild▪ Rolles, and the rest at West­minster, and the city of London, who rule the roaste, wishing wee could make them full Executioners to all our Sinnes, not doubting but they wil improve our aforesaid legacies to the best advantage ye [...], till they shall be pulled out of their house at Westminster, and all they at G [...]ld. Hall shall be whipt about the City.

Item. Wee give and bequeath, all our Scismes, Factions, outra­ges, [Page 5] disturbances, tumults, contentions, to the Sectaries in, and abo [...] the City of London, to bee equally distributed amongst them the 22 of September next ensuing when they shall meet together at the Spittle, to take their farewell of Tub-L [...]ctures, to the end, they may be so well seasoned with seditious principles, that they may on all occasions be prompt and ready to cause new combustions, to give occasion of new jealousies, and to set on foot new distempers, when we shall be quite forgotten, save to ovr Infamy.

Item. Wee give and bequeath, unto our venerable Apostle, Hugh Peters, all those gifts of the Spirit, (which the malignants tearme) of deulsion, with which inabled we that are foot-souldiers and troopers have often with our zealous Oratory frighted the Iack Dawes, of from Countrey Steeples, and have led the high-shoes▪ and ba [...]on mouthes, by the nose to their ruine, and this boon wee are the rather incited to bestow upō him for that he the said Hugh Peters, hath of late dayes absconded himself from us, and hath ta­ken up his quarters with the cutlers-wife, at — having deserted his Apostolicall function, wee meane not his players guyze (which i [...] the reason that ever since he hath been a minister, he acts a ser­mon so ridicously in the pulpit, to the incredible mirth of his Audi­tory, but meane his faculty of prating and confounding Scripture al which his Errors, we are confident will soone leave him, when our spirit shall take up hillet in his breast, also wee bestow upon him, all the riches which we shall leave sow'd up in our doublets when we leave the world (if hee have such good fortune to attain it) which we doe hereby charge him to lay out upon good wine, and handsome whores, for we know, when he leaves such recreation our cause perisheth with him.

Item. Wee give and bequeath all our false eaths our breach of covenant, and our frequent protestations to act nothing that might tend to his Majesties dishonour, the ruine of his Person, or to the diminishing of his just Power and greatnesse, with which plausible pretences (we once deluded the people) to the States at Westmin­ster.

Willing and desiring our said executors, (if at least wee may tearme them so) to improve our impieties aforesaid to the utmost that so (if it be possible) they may yet hold up a twelve moneth longer, and under a pretence of treating with his Majesty, get time to strengthen themselves, or if that fail, to make up their fardles for New-England.

All these out Leganles being duly distributed, according to our aforesaid wish, we will, that Mr. Dell that Gospell Reformer, in whose esteeme his Majesty is a dead dog, doe preach our funerall in the fields, where we desire that all the whole rabble of Sectaries whether Pre [...]biters, Independents, seekers, Anabaptists, Apostoliks, Anti-trinitarians, Familists, Antiscripturians, or Adamites, Sha­kers, Brownists, Barrowists, Erastians, Nicholaitans, Antinomians, Armi [...]ians, and the whole swarmes of Hornets, will be present, and the sermon being finished, to lift up their voyces, with outrag [...]ous shriekes, and horrid gro [...]s, such as may fright nature into a Chaos, and for that we doubt not but Mr. Dell will take great paynes, in sweating out his sermon, we wil that he in recompence therof shal have liberty to print h [...] sermon, and to take money for the co [...] of whatsoever Book seller he can get it, we could wish the dan [...] [...]at Knave, Greek, who keepes shop in fleet-street, had the disp [...]g of it, & so de [...]i [...]ing one long [...]ard brethren, to take warning by our example, we bid them, farewel, assuring them, that wee will not sayle to make known to their friends in the lower world t [...]is present estate.