SECTION I.

WHen I consider that yesterday was the Conclusion of the Last Year, and that I now am entred on ano­ther; 'tis seasonable to reflect on the mutable Condition, and short Duration of all Things in this World, which are measured by Time. That as they have [Page 2]their Beginning, so they have their End: And that the Distance, or Space of Time between the one and the other is very little. Let me not then, O my Soul! Rejoyce and please my self too much in New Injoyments, remembring a Change may be at hand, and the End is certain.

Many who were Rich and Flourishing the last Year, may be reduced to Poverty and deep Distress, before the end of this: Who are now in a Capacity to relieve others, within a few Months, or a shorter Space, may be Objects of other Mens Charity. The Thing which hath been, is that which may be: And that which hath been seen in one Year, may happen in ano­ther; so easily, so quickly may a Charge be made! Riches may unexpectedly change their Owners, and borrow wings of a thousand Accidents, wherewith to fly to Heaven for a new Disposal. ^(*) They therefore who possess, should be as if they pos­sessed not; for the Fashion of this World pas­seth away. Innumerable Casualties may effect that Change, which no Humane Art or Skill can possibly foresee, or hin­der. Afflictive unexpected Evils attend us every where: We cannot promise our [Page 3]selves Tranquility for a Day, much less one Year to come. They lay in wait for us on every side, enter at every Crevice, and commonly overtake us, when we are least apprehensive of their Approach. ^* Man that is born of a Woman is of few Days, and full of Trouble: He cometh up as a Flower, and is cut down; fleeth as a Shadow and continueth not. What then are Riches, Beauty, Strength and Honour, the Accidents of this Substance, which is it self but a Shadow.

How false is the Hope of Man, and how frail is all his Glory! One Day can make an End of all his Riches and Ho­nours: And yet what Solicitude, Care and Labour, to get what we desire of these things, (though often we do not need 'em) and then to keep what we have gotten, and then to encrease it, and then to defend it, and at last to enjoy it, and in a Moment it is snatcht from us, or we from it. His Life is but a Vapour, on which they all depend; then how much less are they? To how speedy an Altera­tion are they subject! What numberless Instances of this, doth one Years Experience furnish! what sadning Disappointments [Page 4]and unexpected Calamities have befallen many since this Day Twelve-month! and Multitudes who are now at Ease, and think their Mountains too strong to be removed, shall meet with sharper Tryals before the End of this Year. Alas! how few consider or believe it, 'till they find it so? All Men should count upon Trouble and Disappointment, Suffering and Sorrow in this World; and he that hath the least Share, is reckoned the most prosperous Man; and yet he knows not how soon his Portion may be doubled. We reckon our Joys by the Absence of some degrees of Sorrow and Calamity that others meet with; and before the End of this Year, our Condition may be as dis­consolate as theirs.

O my Soul! Though I know this to be true; though I cannot, I dare not deny it; yet how difficult is it to conquer the Love of this World, and of this Body, to that degree I ought! to undervalue the interest of a short, a mutable, uncer­tain, and troublesom Life, in comparison of the permanent possession of an everlast­ing Good! Though I know, that what is earthly and temporal must needs be thus changeable and fading; and that it is as true of Man himself, as of any thing un­der [Page 5]the Sun; yet how do I forget what Man is! not only mutable in his State, his Body, and his Life, but in his Mind too, so as to love and hate, to chuse and ne­glect, to delight in, and abhor, such things at one time, as he did not before. He doth not pass the same Judgment, nor re­tain the same Affections at one time, as at another. How do I live, as if all this were as certainly false, as it is unquestionably true? admire, love, fear, trust in Man, as if he were the direct Contrary to what he is, and seek for Immortality upon Earth, and act as if I were assured of it, and were not liable to any Change; though I ac­knowledge and know the Contrary. Though the last Years Experience, and the observation of every Day, doth convince me of it; though all History, and all the Records of the Grave attest it; though all Mankind in every Age have found it so; though it be a manifest notorious Truth, legible in the various Changes and Calamities, but especially in the Dust and Ashes of all, who have lived before us, (our Graves being often made of our Prede­cessors Dust, and the Earth we bury in having once been living) yet how little is it believed, how seldom considered! The Confirmation of it which one Year [Page 6]gives us, hath little Influence on our Hearts or Lives, with respect to the next. We ought therefore to accustom our selves to these Thoughts, before such Changes happen, to which our Final Change shall e're long succeed. They will be less effi­cacious, if never admitted till our Minds are opprest and feebled by the weight of Affliction. We shall then want that Vigour of Reason, which should co-operate with the Remedy; and which if used before­hand, would help to support and stay our Minds, under all subsequent Revolutions. For those Considerations may be able to fix and stay our Minds under Changes, that may not be sufficient to recover, and raise our Spirits, after they are dejected and fallen.

SECTION II.

WHat a discovery doth one Year make of the Mutability of Man, not only of his outward Condition, but of the Man himself; his Temper, his Practise, his Inclinations, his Aversi­ons, &c. He abideth not at one stay; every breath of wind turns him to ano­ther shape. We despise to day, that which we admired yesterday; and to morrow hate the object of our present love. We begin Friendships, and cancel them on slight occasions; And a mortal Enmity often succeeds to a tender Affection: The very Persons, who are in one year our darling Friends, and possibly deserved to [Page 8]be so, may yet be open Enemies the next, and seek our Ruine. Lord! what is Man? How deceitful and mutable the Heart of Man! We know not what other Men are, or will prove to be till a trial; and we are equally ignorant concerning our selves, till an hour of Temptation. How patiently do we think we could bear Af­flictions till we feel them! how partial and mistaken a Judgment do we make of our Wisdom and Strength, in reference to the future? we counsel others to Submission and Resignation in the most difficult trials, and wonder they complain so loud; when we our selves despond, and sink under half their Burthen; and send up our more impatient murmurs to Heaven, when God thinks fit to prove us by a lighter Stroke. We censure and condem Others, who are in an higher Station, and are called to more difficult work than we; when by a little Advancement, and the like Temptation, we discover that we are as bad as they. They who were re­puted Humble, Temperate, and Religious when they have been Exalted higher, become proud, sensual, and ungodly. Had some been told a Twelve month since, what now they are, and speak, and act, they would have made Hazael's Answer, Am I [Page 9]a Dog, that I should do this? A change in the publick Affairs of the State, and by that means of particular Interests, or some Alteration of our own private Cir­cumstances, (calling us to new Duties, and exposing us to new Temptations) discovers us more to our selves and to other Men, than was expected, and proves us to be very different from what we appeared to be.

Such a change, for Instance, as from Poverty to Riches, from Sickness to Health, from Obscurity to Honour, from Privacy to a Publick charge, &c. or on the contrary. Men cannot bear the weight of Tempo­ral Happiness, but Riches and Honours make us to be Other Men, than before we seemed to be. How weak a thing is Man! that cannot carry his own Wishes, without falling under them: That can­not prosper in his designs, without be­ing changed in the Temper of his Mind, upon every success. So true is it, that Man in Honour is like the Beast that perisheth; and changed ordinarily for the worse, as to se­rious Religion. May we not fear, that some, who a year since dared not live a day in the neglect of Closet and Family Devotion, do now omit it, for many Days and Weeks together? And that some, who once were [Page 10]careful to improve the whole Sabbath to religious purposes, now place the whole of their Religion in attending the pub­liek Worship, and think it enough, not for that Day only, but for the whole Week. Under the Afflicting Hand of God, or some Apprehensions of an approaching change, or sense of guilt upon great Transgressions, the Convictions of Sin are lively, Conscience is sensible and a­wake, Affections warm, Resolutions strong, &c. But alas! how soon doth the case alter! our Spirits cool, our Zeal abates, our good Purposes untwist and die, and come to nothing. By degrees we re­turn to Folly, and boldly venture on that Sin, we lately trembled at. Through the want of continued smart Afflictions, or of a serious awakning Ministry, and friendly faithful Admonition; or through the Temptations of vain Company, and the remaining power of fleshly Lusts. So that we falsifie our most sacred Promises and Resolutions, violate our holy Vows, cancel the Bonds of God upon us, suffer the Devil to re-enter, and prevail again, to take possession of our Hearts, and yield our selves an easie prey to his Temptati­ons, till our latter end be worse than our Beginning.

Oh what a Change doth one year let us see in Persons, as well as Things! in our selves, as well as other Men! And as it is with Man himself, so with every thing that he values himself upon, or for which he is esteemed by others; and even his Esteem and Reputation is also changeable and uncertain. Not to In­stance in Riches, but in what is nobler, Learning, and the Improvements of the Mind by Study; how soon may the vio­lence of a Disease disturb or stupifie the Brain to that degree, as shall reduce the greatest Scholar to the pitied Condition of a Fool or Bedlam? And where is his Re­putation and Renown, in such a Case? But much less than that will blast the fairest Reputation, with the far greatest part of the World: It may be lost by unwary Mistakes, by false Reports, by Envy and Malice, by the subtle Hatred of Enemies, or by the Weakness and Cre­dulity of Friends, (who will listen to eve­ry Back-biters Story) or by one or two Indiscretions of the Man himself; and no Man can be certain to secure his Reputa­tion whilst he lives, much less after he is dead. Who can content all Men, how­ever he live? And who is well spoken of by all when he is dead? Who is so [Page 12]esteemed, that some do not despise him? The wisest Conduct cannot hinder, but some will judge hardly and amiss.

How vain and faulty is an Ambition to be talkt of after we are dead, which will be but by very few, and that very dif­ferently, and but for a little while; There is no Remembrance of former things, nei­ther shall there be of things to come, with those that shall come after, Eccles. 1.11. For how little a while do the proudest Monuments last, that are set over the rot­ten Flesh and Bones of many, to preserve their Memory? God hath promis'd, 'tis true, that The Righteous shall be had in everlasting Remembrance; but it must be understood so far only, as the frame and state of this World, and the Revolutions and Vicissitudes of Time will permit. But what Good can it do us, farther than the Interest of God's Glory, and the Good of others is concerned in it? The Blessed will not need it, and the Dam­ned have no Advantage by it: And no Endeavours can be certain of Success: For People will talk of us as they please; and their Opinions very often change from one Extream to the other: But he who hath the loudest Fame, shall only be talkt of a little longer than his Neigh­bours; [Page 13]and that by a few dying Men, that must themselves be e're long forgot­ten. And how small a part of the inha­bited World, is acquainted so much as with the Name of the greatest Men in Europe? And how different and contrary are mens Opinions and Discourses of them, where they are known and talkt of? And how many holy, excellent Persons are buried in Oblivion, or mis-represented as unworthy to live on Earth, whose Names will be found in the Book of Life? Our Life is yet as mutable, and uncertain as any of theirs. The Time is hastning, when we shall be too old to Live, but at any time we are old enough to Die. Our Breath is in our Nostrils; and though there be room enough for it to go out, we have no Assurance that we shall have power to draw it in again.

SECT. III.

I Now begin another Year: But what Assurance have I to out-live it? I can­not [Page 14]not say, how soon my Sovereign Judge may call me hence, and summon me to appear before his Righteous Bar. O let me not defer my necessary Preparation for Death, which may be nearer than I imagine! Let me mind the Great things first, which are of absolute necessity to be done, some time or other before I dye. This perishing Body which I have pam­pered and indulged, at the expence of so much Cost and Time, may be putrify­ing in a silent Grave, before half this Year be past. Lord! bless this thought, to a­waken my diligent endeavours to secure the Blessedness of Eternity! to mortifie the desire of Great Things for my self, in future Years, by the considered Possibi­lity of dying before the end of this! Let me look into the Graves of others, and consider that this may quickly happen to me, and must ere long be my own ease: Let me think what this Body will shortly be, when it hath been six or eight days separated from my Soul; how vile? how loathsome? that I may despise the Beauty, and be dead to the Pleasures of the Body, which so easily, so suddenly, so strangely may be changed. For no Glass is more brittle, no Bubble more va­nishing, no Ice more dissolving, no Flower [Page 15]more fading, no Shadow less substantial, no Sleep or Dream more deceiving, no Sound more transient, nothing more vain and more uncertain than Life, on which all other things in this World depend. My days are as nothing saith Job, though they lasted above two Ages.

There is hardly any thing very frail and feeble, mutable and uncertain, but the Spirit of God in Scripture sets forth the Vanity of Life by; as if he would teach us by it, from the Light of every perishing Object, which our Eyes behold, to reflect on our own Mortality. We sleep every Night, in the outer Chambers of Death: And in some Diseases Sleep, which is the image and Picture of Death, is ta­ken away, to give place to the Original, and make way for death. And every year, every week, every day are we ha­stening to our final Change; which may overtake us e're we are aware. Every day we lose some part of our Lives; in our very growth from Infancy to Man­hood, our Life decreases, and grows less. Every Pulse and Breath doth tell us, we are hastening to the End of Time, and calls upon us to dispatch our Work.

If we consider ^* Time, to be the measure [Page 16]of Motion, however it may seem to have three Stations; Past, Present and Future, yet the First and Last of these are not: (one is not now, and the other is not yet.) That which you call Present, is not now the same it was, when you be­gan to call it so in this Line? before you sound that word Present, or the Mona­syllable Now, the Present, and the Now is past. If we consider Eternity, into that Time never entred; Eternity is not an Everlasting Flux of Time; but Time is a short Parenthesis in a long Period; and Eternity had been the same, as it is, tho' Time had never been. If we consi­der not Eternity, but Perpetuity, which shall out- live Time, and be when Time shall be no more. What a Minute is the Life of Man to that? How soon must it end?

Every Word we speak, is formed of that Breath whereby we live; and we may not live to pronounce another Sen­tence, but the Lamp of Life may be ex­tinguisht and blown out by a sudden Blast. Every thing we do, carries away some Sands of our little Glass of Time; and how little may remain? Or how soon may the Glass be broken? Our Souls are in our Bodies, as a little Air inclosed [Page 71]in a thin Bubble; how easily is that bro­ken, and where are we? How many who are now alive, in health and vigour, who deliberate on their Meat and Drink, and are curious of Air and Exercise, to maintain themselves in Health, and please themselves with the Dream of Years to come, shall never see another New-years-day? It may be not another Month, or week, or morrow? Many have promised themselves great things on the morrow, but dyed before Night: Let me not say, I shall not die this Day, when I may this Hour; and 'tis but once for all, there is no amending an ill Death, by another Tryal. ‘When I lie down to sleep, I hope to rise stronger and fresher, and fitter for work; but I know withal, I may rise no more. And may not my Name be on the Roll of those who shall next be called, at least some time this Year? Let me not then neglect or foolishly delay my Principal Busi­ness, to provide against a Change, which is inevitable, but the time of it altoge­ther doubtful. Ought not my first and chiefest care to be imployed, to make my peace with God, (He alone can be my happiness to his final Judgment I am hastening; His Favour alone can [Page 18]give me Support and Joy in a dying Hour: To his Mercy I must trust, when I leave this World, and can have no advantage more by any thing in it:) that he may mercifully receive my Soul at Death and be my Everlasting Portion? Do I know my Life is thus vain and transient, and shall I not se­riously improve it to such a Purpose? Shall these Thoughts leave no Impres­sion upon me? Do I breath continually in this Element of Vanity, and yet for­get where I am, and remain insensible of so near a Change? Shall these Thoughts pass away as a vanishing Cloud, and distil no softening drops on my Soul? Shall the Image of Death, which meets me every where, be only like an appearing Ghost or Phantasm, that startles and scares a little, but is presently gone, and no more considered? Oh! let me now re­member to make God my Friend, and secure an interest in his Eternal Mer­cy, while the Day lasts; yea, while my Reason and Understanding are free, and not disturbed and clouded by Fear and Pain, and the Disorders of the Body, as commonly they are in Sickness, if God should vouchsafe me that Warning, which yet I may not [Page 19]promise my self to have, for I may be cut off by a Sudden Stroke, before the end of this Year, I now begin.’

And how great and necessary a Work have I to do in so short and so uncertain a Portion of Time? Endless joy or Mi­sery will be the consequence of spending this present Time. My ignorant Soul must be instructed, my carnal Heart re­newed, many false Opinions must be un­learnt, and sinful Customs changed, and powerful Lusts mortified, and strong Temptations overcome, and many Gra­ces to be obtained, exercised, strengthen­ed and preserved, to please and serve, and glorifie an Holy, Omnipresent God, my Soveraign; and express the Thank­fulness of my Heart and Life to Christ my Saviour; and is all this nothing? Is not all my little hasty Time too little for such a Work? to prepare for a safe and comfortable Death, in order to a blessed Eternity?

SECT. IV.

WHen I look back on the preceed­ing Years of my Life, how easi­ly can I grasp them all at once? they are even as yesterday when 'tis past. But so many Years to come hath something great and vast, which fills my Thoughts, and affects my Mind, after another manner. Such is the difference between past In­joyments, and the Expectation of future. Let me suppose the same term and dura­tion of Years, and yet how different are my Apprehensions of what is past, and of what is yet to come! Things past by a re­membrance of some remarkable Passages, when they happened, seem to be present with me: But not knowing what may happen in the same number of Years to come, I have nothing whereon to fix my Thoughts. Or the Reason of this Difference may rather be, that Men in this degenerate and necessitous State (with unsatisfied Desires reaching after Happiness, and sensible nothing present [Page 21]can afford it, and knowing by Experi­ence that nothing past could have done it) are eagerly desirous of Felicity; and because we know not but what is to come may procure it, we hope it will; which makes the Time seem long, by reason of our Expectation and Desire of Good. Whereas the foresight of Evil, and the Expectation of that, some years hence, makes the Time rather seem short, and near at hand: So many years to come, in the expectation and desire of Good, are long and tedious? such Hope deferred makes the heart sick, even tho' 'tis of that sort, as must needs fail our expectations.

Prepare me, Lord! for what thine un­erring Counsel shall please to order, as to the remainder of my Time on Earth; and suffer me not to count upon a great number of Years to come, since this, for ought I know, may be my last: Neither let me expect Rest and Happiness in this World, which nothing Temporal can afford. This is not the state or season, wherein, by any promise of God, I am encouraged to hope it. And if fifty or threescore years to come, be thought so great a matter, and really is so, as to our stay on Earth; Oh! what apprehensions ought I to admit concerning an endless, [Page 22] everlasting State! especially being as cer­tain of the latter, after Death, as I am uncertain about the former; whether so many Years be yet to come before my Death. Let me not hereafter be so pre­posterous in my Solicitude, Cares, and Fears, as to be anxious for to Morrow, and yet be thoughtless of Eternity.

SECT. V.

THink, O my Soul! how short is that Life at longest, made up of Years and Months, and Days; such little parts and yet in number few. Well therefore may it be exprest, as I find in Holy Writ, by years of Number, that is, such as may soon be numbred. When a few Years are come, saith Job ^(*), (or the Years of number, as in the Original) I shall go the way, whence I shall not return. By the years of an Hireling, which were not a­bove three, Isa. 16.14. We usually com­pute [Page 23] Threescore and Ten Years, to the life of Man: Let me suppose fourscore. The Bed with most imploys one half; and hardly one in Thirty doth reach the Age of Seventy Years. And ^(*) they who live to such an Age, do yet complain how soon 'tis done. Ignorant Child­hood and heedless Youth, and infirm old Age, may be supposed to take up a third part of that Time. In either of them very little of the great Ends of Life are answered. We ordinarily begin to rec­kon our lives from our Birth; whereas for a good while after, we know not whether we are alive or no, but are be­holding to others to make the account for us. When we first come to the stea­dy use of Reason, or what we call the years of Discretion; how few are there, but from the Prejudices of Education, from the Corruption of Human Na­ture, from the want of Experience, from the Infection of bad Company, how few, I say, but spend their younger Years in those things, which afterwards they are ashamed of, when experience hath taught them the Wisdom of Men? How great a part of our remaining Time is taken up in the Necessities of Nature, about Food [Page 24]and Rayment, and in lawful Cares, to support the Body? and how much more than needs, in pampering, dressing and adorning it? Out of the small remainder, how much is imployed in the concerns of a Family, and near Relations, in particu­lar Callings, in necessary Civil Business, and in getting, keeping, or improving an Estate? Besides all the Time that is spent in Recreations, Visits, unprofitable Dis­course, impertinent Thoughts, Journeys, Sickness, and innumerable other Occasi­ons, some allowable, some unavoidable, and many needless? After this, how lit­tle Time remains wherein to cultivate and improve our Minds, by Languages, Arts and Sciences, or the knowledge of a Trade, &c. How little then after all, may we say, is left for the matters of Re­ligion? for Devotion to God, and serious Preparation for another World?

Alas! how small a number of Years make up the Life of Man! and how small a Portion of that, is imployed about the Principal Business, for which we were born, and for which we live? We divide Time into Past, Present, and Future: But the Past is not now ours; the Future is not yet, and the Present now is past, e're the sound be pronounced. And yet this is [Page 25] all the Time allotted us wherein to se­cure the Blessedness of Eternity. How many Hours more of our little Time might be improved, than commonly are by the Best? In every Year there are 8775 Hours: If we allow the greatest half for sleep, and necessary attendance on the Body, and take but 4000 Hours for our Work and Business of conse­quence: How poor an account can most Men give of all these 4000 Hours in e­very Year? not one hour in seven, not one in ten, is ordinarily devoted to God, and the purposes of Religion. Should it not affect us, seriously to consider this? especially if we remember, at what an uncertainty we are, how small a number of Days and Hours do yet remain. This Year, this Month, this Week, this Day or Hour may be my last. What an un­suspected Accident or a sudden Disease may do, I know not: But this I know, that there is scarce any thing that hath not killed some Body; an Hair, a Feather, a Vapour, a Breath hath done it, and when the Apostle James ask the Questi­on, What is your Life? He Answers, It is even a Vapour, that appeareth a little while, and then vanisheth away.

SECT. VI.

IS the life of Man so short and fleeting, our Days on Earth so few, and so un­certain? How careful should I be to ma­nage every Hour, endeavouring to match the Swiftness of Time by my celerity, and diligence to improve it? I can have no Business of greater or of equal Moment to mind, than to secure the Happiness of my Soul in another World. And shall I lavish my Time, and lose my Pains a­bout things unnecessary? What will all other Business signifie in the end, if this be neglected? Is there any Interest more weighty, that calleth me from such work? Is there any thing else that so well de­serves my Time? That may be put into the Scales, or weighed in a balance a gainst this? Shall Eternity, which com­prehends all Time, have the least share of my Time allotted for its concern­ments? How little a part of my Time hath been hitherto employed in such work! How reasonable, how necessary [Page]is it to redeem the little Inch of Time that yet remains, but hastens to a Period? For as there is no Covenant to be made with Death, so no Agreement for the Ar­rest and Stay of Time; it keeps its pace whether I redeem, and use it well or not.

The greatest part of our Life is design­edly employed to avoid Death; we eat and drink, and sleep, and labour, and rest, that we may not die; and yet even by these we hasten to Death. Every Breath, every Pulse, every Word leaves one less of the number, which God hath appointed me, and carries away some Sands of the Glass of Time; and yet how little care is taken to employ it well? We seldom value it, till we can no longer use it to any advantage; and though we know it can neither be retarded in its motion, or recalled when past, yet of nothing are we more prodigal. Yea, how many complain of it as a Burthen, and know not what to do with their Time, are exceedingly at a loss wherein to em­ploy it, what to do to be rid of it? But alas! how near is that Change, when they shall think nothing too dear to pur­chase some few Grains of that Sand, which now seem too many, while they are passing through their Hour-glass? [Page 28]How sad will be the review of our lost and ill-spent Time? How different an Opinion of its Value shall we have on a Sick-Bed, or when our Time and Hope is gone? How many Weeks, and Days, and Hours, O my Soul, have I trifled away in Sloath and Idleness, in foolish Mirth, and hurtful Company, in vain Thoughts and impertinent Discourse, in excess of Sleep, and needless Pastimes, Feastings, inordinate Care to adorn the Body, or gratifie the sensual Appetite? All that which is past is irrecoverable; and the little remainder slies apace. How quick­ly will it be gone; how soon, how sud­denly, may an unexpected Stroke of Death conclude it? And yet this is all the op­portunity I shall ever have, to make my Peace with God, and prepare for the everlasting World.

Did we consider it as we ought, we should not foolishly throw away so much of it in Trifles, and things impertinent, or what is worse: How much more might we redeem than commonly we do? To how much better purpose might we hus­band it? How much more work might we do, were we never idle, or did not loyter? We might walk far, did we not often stand still, or go out of our way. [Page 29]We see it plainly by the great and excel­lent Effects of some few Mens Industry in every Age. Art hath found means to set Spies and Watches as it were on the Sun, that he cannot look out, but they take hold of his Shadow, and force it to tell how far he is gone that day: And yet while we are curious in making Time give a just Account of it self to us, how little do we consider the account of our Time, which we must shortly give to God? Oh! that such a Thought might effectu­ally persuade me to redeem it! that I may not tarry till the end of Time, to know the worth of it! Let me not undervalue it, while 'tis given me to be used, that I may not eternally regret my Folly, when Time shall be no more.

God calls me to Diligence and Labour; the Work he calls me to is excellent, and the Reward glorious; to know, and love, and serve, and obey Him, in order to Eter­nal Life; and shall I yet be Idle? Is this the Use and End of all my Time? And do I know it, and believe it? Do I in­deed believe it, and yet delay and loyter, and wast my precious Hours in Vanity? Am I going into Eternity, and entring into another World, and know that I must be in Heaven or Hell for ever, and [Page 30]have I Time to throw away? Am I fit to die, and to appear before my Judge, or am I not? Am I made meet for Hea­ven, by pardoning Mercy, and sanctify­ing Grace? Have I the Earnest of the Spirit to witness and assure me of it? Is my Interest in the Promise of Eternal Life as firm, and my Evidence of it as clear, as it may be made? Am I not con­scious to my self, that much of this ne­cessary Work is yet to be done? And shall such an unprepared Soul as mine, be careless and indifferent how I spend my Time?

SECT. VII.

WHen I consider the beginning of another Year, I can hardly avoid reflecting on its several parts, Summer and Winter, Spring and Fall, Day and Night, and their alternate Turns. This calls me to observe, and admire his Eter­nal Power and Godhead, Wisdom and [Page 31]Truth, who is the Great Author of this admirable variety; Who hath fixed the Earth with his Foot, and hanged it on nothing, and setled the Luminaries of Heaven for Excellent Ends: The Sun to Ruleby Day, and the Moon by Night, there­by to distinguish Times and Seasons, to separate Day and Night, Winter and Summer, and consult the convenience of Man and Beast, by their due Succession. The Day is thine, the Night also is thine, thou makest Summer and Winter: How wonderful is their Order, Beauty, and constant Course; that when the Sun withdraws, and the shadows of the Even­ing cover the Earth with darkness, to conclude the Day; the Moon and Stars supply the place of the absent Sun, du­ring the Night: And that tho' they dif­fer in length, yet gradually lessen, till they are both equal at the years end, and have made the same Circuit. How excel­lent a work of God, is that quick successi­on to one another? The supposition of a perpetual Night, is a dismal gloomy thought. O what will the Everlasting Darkness of the Infernal Prison be! The Sun by day enlightens the Earth, directs our Moti­on, guides our Way, governs our Travail, assists Conversation, awakens Industry, [Page 32]warms the Earth, and Air, gives Life, and Vigor, and fruitfulness to all things under the Sun, and makes the whole In­feriour Creation to rejoyce. An Em­blem of God's universal Goodness, who is kind to all his Creatures. How ad­mirable is its Lustre! how glorious is its Light! how loudly doth it proclaim his Power and Wisdom! who made this, and the other Lights of Heaven, by his powerful Word, and preserves them hitherto by his daily Providence.

If God be now so glorious, contem­plated in his Works, considered in the lustre of the created Sun, viewed only through the Windows of Sense; how much more glorious will he appear here­after, when we shall see him face to face, and nothing interpose betwixt us and his incomparable Light! If mine Eyes dazle to look upon the meridian Sun, in what inaccessible Light must he dwell, who is the Father of Lights? If this lower World the common receptacle of his Friends and Enemies, have so much of his Glory vouchsafed them by the Heavenly Bo­dies; O what a place will Heaven be, where shall be no Sun or Moon, nor need of any, but the glory of God shall lighten it, and the Lamb be the Light thereof?

While I thus consider the Sun, and the Day, I must not think the Night is use­less, which discovers another part of the Heavens, not discernable by the Day, viz. the Stars and Planets, refreshing the Earth, cooling the Air, giving necessary Rest to the Creatures, &c. Their order, motions, aspects, oppositions, influences, are all useful, and instructive. The a­greeable mixtures of Light and Dark­ness, the regular succession of Day and Night within a few hours, are exceed­ing wonderful, and advantageous. In other parts of the World, where the Sun­beams are more direct, and its heat exces­sive, God hath made amends by the length of the Night, (under the Equi­noctial Line it is always Twelve hours) and in the more Northen parts, where the Influence of the Sun is weaker, the days are proportionably longer. So good is God to all his Creatures, in all parts of the world. As the Morning and Even­ing answer to the day of Twenty four hours; so doth Spring and Autumn to the Twelve months of the Year, that we may not pass immediately from one ex­tream to another, but gradually be dispo­sed for so great a change, as is between Summer and Winter, and Winter and [Page 34]Summer. So merciful and gracious, and infinitely wise is God, in all his Works! so that we cannot say, one part of the Year is more necessary than another. The Winter is as useful for the good of the Universe, as the Summer: In this we are supplied with what is necessary to main­tain us in that. And the admirable Situ­ation of the Sun (most probably) in the Center of the World, seems much to con­tribute to it. If it had been at a farther distance from us, our Earth would have been in a manner desolate; because the Influence of the Sun could not have been considerable: And if it had been nearer: the Stars above would have wanted Light, and this Earth under been burnt up. The Excellent Order which it hath now obeyed for above six Thousand Years, is also wonderful. The Sun never stood still but once, and that by a Miracle; tho' much inferiour to that of it's daily Progress. What a Subject is here to ad­mire the Power, Goodness, Wisdom, and Faithfulness of God? Lord! what is Man! For whom thou dost all this? And because I find every Year that the Day dies into Night, the Summer into Winter, and Herbs and Plants lose their Beauty and Verdure, and shed their Blossoms; [Page 35]may I not hence learn to consider, and prepare for my own Approaching Change? In Prosperity, Health, and Ease, and Life, to expect, and make Provision for Trouble, Sickness, Pain and Death? as every Wise Man in Summer would do for Winter; and work with all my Might, while it is called to day; while the Light continues, because the Night of Darkness is at hand, when none can work.

SECT. VIII.

NOT only few, and uncertain, but Evil likewise are the Days of the Years of my Life, may every one say, with the Patriarch Jacob. A sufficient Portion of Evil for every year may well be ex­pected, when our Lord tells us, there is a certain Measure allotted for every Day. Sufficient to the Day is the Evil of it. Not only is our Life short, but trouble­some, full of vexations Mixtures. We cannot sing a Requiem to our Souls, when one great Calamity is past; for we know [Page 36]not in this Region of Changes, but ano­ther, a greater may be be at hand. One Mes­senger of ill News may succeed and outdo another, as it was with Job. We come weeping into the World in a most help­less, forlorn State; and if we escape the Dangers of Infancy, and the Casualties of Childhood; and after that outlive the Snares and Follies of Youth, we are tost upon the Pikes of Time and Chance, and sadden and disquiet our selves with a thou­sand Griefs and Sorrows, by inevitable and unexpected Occasions; though we encrease the number of needless Cares and Fears and Discontents; 'Till at length a sudden stroke arrests us, we fetch a groan, and dye.

Who can give a Catalogue of the Af­flictions and Calamities, Perplexities and Disappointments, Incumbrances, Crosses, and evil Accidents of Humane Life? By means whereof Millions are disconsolate and sad, mourn and complain, weep and sigh, and from day to day are fed with the Bread of Affliction, and the Water of Adversity. Not to mention Mens fluctu­ating restless Thoughts of Heart, impor­tunate Desires, baffled Projects, defeated Purposes, which suppose or bring Vexa­ation. A good share of these is not to [Page 37]be avoided; and yet very few can be Par­ticularly foreseeen. Who could prognosti­cate a year ago the Mercies, or the Evils, which have happened since? Publick and Private, Personal and Relative, to the Countries, Cities, Families and Persons we are concerned for? And who can cer­tainly foretel the Eyents of this ensuing Year? God hath intermixt Good and Evil in the Life of Man: He hath set Pro­sperity against Adversity, saith Solomon, to the End, That Man should find nothing after him, Eccles. 7.14. that he may not know what shall come next, whether a Prosperous or a Calamitous Event.

What a Change may be made in a year by the meer Casuality of Humane Events? by the Treachery of Friends, or the Ma­lice of Enemies, or the more immediate Hand of God? We know not what shall be on the Morrow, much less what a Twelve Month may produce. Because whatever may be disposed to happen, from natural Causes or civil Counsels, may be altered by a particular Decree of Providence. Prepare me, Lord! and every of those in whose Felicity I more especially take part, for all the Calamities and Sorrows, thine infinite Wisdom shall think fit to exercise us with, this following Year; [Page 38]and by thy merciful Providence, and gracious Conduct, cause them to work for Good: Furnishing us with suitable Strength and Wisdom, to acquiesce in thy good Pleasure, and obey thy Will. Let me follow thee, as the Father of the faith­ful, tho' I know not whether thou wilt lead me. Knowing the Wisdom and Faithfulness of my Pilot, let me therein be satisfied, though I know not particu­larly what Course he will steer.

I thank thee, O Heavenly Father! that thou hast reserved the Knowledge of fu­ture Times and Seasons to thy self, and hid Events from Men; Lest by consider­ing them Certain, we should presume in case they are Good; or should despair­ingly afflict our selves, by foreseeing the Evil we know to be inevitable. Did we certainly foreknow the Good that would befall us, we should not Trust in Thee to bring it to pass, or heartily implore thy Care and Conduct. Did we foresee the Evils we shall suffer, before they over­take us, we should be overwhelmed with Diffidence and Despair. Many a Mother who rejoyceth at the Birth of a Son, would mourn to foresee what a Man, what a Son he will prove. Such an in­crease of Knowledge would increase our [Page 39]Sorrow; such a Prescience would tran­sport and discompose us, by unseasonable Joys and Sorrows, born out of Time; make us remiss in our Duty to Thee; and weaken our Dependance on thine own unerring Wisdom, Truth, and Power.

SECT. IX.

THE longest Life is but a day multi­plied; and who can certifie, or as­sure me, which will be my last? He only, who was God as well as Man, could say, Mine Hour is not yet come. Is all my Life given me to resolve this Question, Whe­ther I shall be in Heaven or Hell for ever? And have I any time to lose, and squan­der away, as superfluous? have I any more than needs? 'Tis no impossible, or unreasonable Supposition to make, that I may dye this Year. Let me admit that [Page 40]Thought, and imagine my self on a Bed of Sickness, wearied with Pain, and ready to leave this World; the Physitians gone, despairing of my Recovery; my Friends about me weeping; and all things in a doleful Melancholy Posture, suited to such a state; feeling within my self the presages of Death, expecting the final stroke, in an hour or two more, What is then the value of sensual Pleasures? can I then relish or savour them? what then is Honour to me, who shall never go abroad more to receive it, 'till carried to my Grave? will it then comfort me to have lived in Reputation, and Applause, if my Heart was not hum­ble under it, and the Honour of God promoted by it? Can Riches and a great Estate support me, when I am just packing up, for a Removal to the other World? In that Hour will it be any Satisfaction, to have made a stir and noise for a few years upon Earth, to be talkt of for a while longer than other Men? Are these the things, my dying thoughts will be most concerned to reflection?

These Dignities, Pleasures, and Posses­sions offered to a dying Man, would ra­ther upbraid than tempt him; they come too late, as a Prince's Pardon to a Man [Page 41]whose Head is off. Die I must, and ap­pear before my Judge, to answer for all that I have received, and done in the Bo­dy. Fool that I was, (shall I then too justly say to my self,) not to have considered this much sooner! not to have provided for it at a better Rate! my Sins stare me in the Face, my. Conscience tells me I am not ready for such a Trial: I have lived a stranger to such Thoughts as now I cannot refuse, and which should have been admitted sooner. But if to such a state, any hope of Mercy may be granted, (tho' it be unspeakable little) yet I can­not promise my self any such Warning by Sickness. The sleeping Virgins were called at Midnight, and so may I. Where can I pitch my Tents on Earth, to be se­cure against a sudden Remove?

Lord! make these Thoughts effectual to prevent my Loss of precious Time, which at such a season, will be esteemed preci­ous, tho' now it be not. O how swift, how short is my Time of Trial, in order to Eter­nity! how difficult how important a work is it to prepare for an Everlasting State! What is all this World, how little, how meer a nothing, to a departing Soul? And shall I after such Reflections, conti­nue to pursue Shadows, and please my [Page 42]self with empty Dreams? when being so near my final Judgment, the Common Wisdom of a Man requires me to mind it in good Earnest; and be more solici­tous about it than for any thing Tempo­ral? O in what manner will Death open my Eyes, by shutting the Windows of Sense! How shall I then see the Nothing­ness of what is but Temporal, and the Reality of what is Eternal!

We sometimes laugh to see the Vanity of little Children, who are greatly pleased with painted Toys, and busily employed about Trifles. It extorts a Smile to see them eager, and industrious, and mightily concerned in their Childish Sports; to see them sigh or weep for little things which we despise; to observe with what Solici­tude and Care they'll raise a little Fabrick, which three Moments after they them­selves pull down, or would otherwise tumble of its own Accord. We laugh at these, but should weep over our selves, as the greater and elder Fools; who are every whit as silly, yea infinitely more; that considering we know the fraily of our present Life, and can look beyond the Grave to another World, should yet mispend our precious Time on things which cannot profit; and please our selves [Page 43]with what is so unsuitable to our Age and State: and suffer our Passions to work with violence, for a thing of nought? and our greatest Diligence, Care, and Zeal, to be exercised on things imperti­nent and vain; that are perishing in them­selves, and can contribute nothing to our Eternal Welfare. And is it not thus, with reference to all that Men toil and labour for, with the Neglect of an immortal State?

The Voluptuous Sadducee will not re­fuse the present Gratification of his sen­sual Appetite, because he is uncertain of another day. Let us eat and drink, for to Morrow we dye. Should not the same Motive quicken my Diligence in a better work? and because my Lord may come suddenly at a Thief in the Night, immedi­ately prepare to meet him? Let me now therefore, O my Soul! look forward to the End of Life and Time! and so let me esteem, and seek, and choose, and do eve­ry thing in the first place, which then I shall wish I had; Let me do nothing now, which I verily believe I shall then be a­shamed, or sorry to reflect on; that by thinking what a Condition I shall then wish to have my Soul in, I may now pro­vide my self, much better than I have [Page 44]done hitherto. That while I am in the greatest probability of living, I may sup­pose my change to be near, and so not dare to do any thing, but what I would or might do, if I were in the present Ex­pectation of Death. To this end, let me go down to the Potters-House, descend to the Consideration of my Mortality, and dwell among the Tombs; remembring the Aegyptians built themselves better Tombs than Houses, because they were to dwell longer in them. Let every Nights repose, serve me as a Memorial of my last sleep! and let my Bed stand for the Mo­del of my Coffin! This is the only Way, to be dead to this World; to be able to judge of things now, as we shall do after Death, according to Immutable, Eternal Truth.

SECT, X.

THE shortning of our Days is the fruit of Sin. All the Funerals that [Page 45]have ever been in the World, have been caused by Sin. We dye because we have sinned, and yet we should not sin as now, if this were not forgot, that we must dye. From the first Transgression of Adam we derive our Death; and therefore some of his Posterity lived longer than he. Which proves that the lengthning of our Days is the peculiar Gift of God; and yet 'tis such a Gift, as was more desired formerly, than since the Appearance of Christ: For we read of none in the New Testa­ment, since Life and Immortality is brought to Light by the Gospel, who desired a long Continuance here on Earth.

Were we delivered from Sin, the sting of Death, by having made our Peace with God in the Blood of Jesus, Death would not be frightful, or put on such a Ghastly Vizor, as to most it doth. But we are uncertain of our Justification, we waver between Hopes and Fears as to our final Sentence; and are conscious to our selves, that we are not ready for our great Account. This makes Death so terrible. Considering withal that it is inevitable; The Way of all the Living. For tho' the Curse be removed, and the sting be taken out by our Blessed Saviour; so that the Souls of Believers are safe, and shall not be [Page 46]touch'd by the second Death; yet God hath not taken away the stroke of it from the Body. Tho' a Christian is assured of deliverance from Hell, he is not exempt­ed from the Grave, as his Passage to Heaven.

Prepare me, Lord, by the free Remis­sion of all my Sins, and make me meet for the Blessed Inheritance, by sanctify­ing Grace; and then thy Time is best; Thy Holy Will be done, No matter then, whether my Death be violent, or what we call Natural. It will be one of the two, for I can't expect to be Translated by a miraculous Change, as Holy Enoch was; and as they shall be, who shall be found alive in the World, when our Glo­rious Judge shall come again. There are but those three ways of leaving Earth; and the Three first Men of whose Depar­ture we read in Scripture, are Instances of all Three. Abel of a violent Death, Adam of a natural One, and Enoch of a Translation. The Variety and Order of their Departure, as one observes, is very admirable, and deserves to be considered. For all Mankind must follow one or other of those three Examples. Every Man or Woman, that is born into the World, must leave it by one of those three ways; [Page 47]either be cut off by a violent Death, as Abel, the first Man who dyed; or dye a natural Death, as Adam did, who was the second; or be translated, as Enoch, who was the third we read of.

But though I know, that within a few Years at farthest, I must leave this World by one or other of these ways; though I have been dying ever since I began to live; am Dead to the last Year, and to all the preceeding Portions of my Time; and know withal, that what remains will quickly pass and be gone after the same manner; yet how have I overloved this Body, as if I should never live out of it! and set my Heart and Affections on this World, as if I should never remove to another! and trifled away my precious Time and Life, as if a change would ne­ver come!

That Few do seriously admit such Thoughts is too evident, by the general Course and Practice of their Lives. For to what Hazards do Men expose them­selves? what Pains will they take? what Inconveniences will they bear? with what unwearied Industry will they toyl and labour, to get a little Money, or Honour in this World, tho' they know not, but they may be called out of it, be­fore [Page 48]the End of this Year? And yet the same Persons are remiss and slothful a­bout a future Life! negligent and uncon­cerned about an Eternal State; careless and indifferent, yea, sottishly stupid, a­bout the Welfare of their Immortal Souls. Henceforward, O my Soul! whatever others do, let me resolve to live in the Expectation of a Change, which I know is certain, and may be very near.

SECT. XI.

LET me retire a little, O my Soul! and bethink my self, what a World this is; what Men design and seek, and do and suffer; with what false and feigned Joys they are pleased, being only happy by Comparison; and with what real Sorrows they are afflicted; what innume­rable Disappointments, Sicknesses, (and as troublesome Remedies,) Dangers, Labours, Pains, and Calamities of all sorts, [Page 49]Multitudes groan under, and loudly com­plain of? And what little unworthy Ends are pursued, by all that do not seriously seek Eternal Rest? and how often fru­strated? And withal consider the Cares that disquiet us, the Errors that deceive us, the many Temptations that assault and overcome us; how busie we are about Vanities; how often dejected, and melancholy for the breaking of a Bubble; how eager and industrious to pursue a Shadow; active and in earnest to destroy our selves, and one another; and then reflect on the Malice and Cru­elty, the Filthiness, and Impiety, and great Corruption, which abounds every where; whereby God is dishonoured, and provokt to Anger? after this what a Theater of Tragedies, must this World appear? what an Hospital of Sick, and diseased, or rather distracted Persons? How should I be tempted to say, Lord! why hast thou made all Men in vain? In vain indeed, if I could not look from this Sea of Troubles, to the Haven of Rest, from this dark Prison, to the Region of Light; from this deceitful, troublesome, and defiling Earth, to a Blessed, Everlasting Heaven: For verily, if there be no World but this, Every Man in his Best Estate in [Page 50]this World, is altogether Vanity, Selah. Psal. 39.5. 'Tis a certain undoubted Truth, the prefixed verily tells us so; and that it deserves to be well considered, we learn from the concluding Selah, Every Man is Vanity. Not the Inferiour Parts of the Creation only; but Man the Lord of all: And Every Man, every Adam from himself, to the last Man that shall by ordinary Generation descend from him. Not the Ignorant, Poor, or Wicked only, but all the Individuals of this Species. Young or Old, Strong or Weak, Beautiful or Deformed, Rich or Poor, High or Low, Good or Bad, (in re­spect of the Body, and this present Life) every one is vanity; and this is true, sup­pose him in his Best Estate, not only in helpless Infancy and Childhood, or in de­crepit old Age, not only in Pain and Poverty, and Disgrace; but in his most setled, most flourishing, most envied, and admired Condition upon Earth; in the midst of Strength and Wit, and Honour; when at best, as to Body, and Mind, and outward Circumstances; when he looks fairest; when he shines brightest; in the height of all his Glory, with the greatest Likelyhood of a Continuance; yet then he is but Vanity, In his Frame, in his [Page 51]Temper, Constitution, Inclinations, Acti­ons, and Employment; he is a meer Sha­dow, an empty, mutable, inconsiderable Thing, and not to be accounted of. His Heart, his Head, his Imaginations, Rea­sonings, Desires, Purposes, Projects, Hopes and Fears, are all Vanity; and alto­gether Vanity, in all the Parts, and Kinds, and Particulars of it. He not only may be, but he is so, in his best Estate; if this World be his Best, if this be our All, and nothing more to be expected after Death.

And how should such a Reflection strike me to the Heart, to suppose that after a few Years are ended, I must return to my first Nothing, and my very being be ^(*) swallowed up of Eternal Death! what Satisfaction can I then take in any present Enjoyments, if an Eternal Anni­hilation be at hand, when I must bid Adieu for ever to all that I now possess? What Delight can I have in the ordinary Comforts of Life, with this Belief, that within a Year or two, it may be to Mor­row, I shall sink into the Dust, and exist no more? What Pleasure in any thing with this dismal Expectation? The more flourishing my Condition is in this World, [Page 52]the more should I dread to lose it, if no­thing better, nothing at all, can be in­joyed after Death. Some Philosphers have ignorantly urged such a considerati­on, as an Antidote against the fear of death; but the admission of it may rather deprive a Man of all the comfort of Life. What then is the advantage of a Wise Man a­bove a Fool? the exercise and improve­ment of our noblest Faculties, would ren­der us more miserable than others, if no­thing be expected, and certain, when this Life is over. Not only sensual, but in­tellectual pleasures would be disturbed, and destroyed by such Thoughts; that very shortly, the next Year, or Day I must disappear; and all my Injoyments and Hopes be utterly and for ever lost, with my very Being.

Were the case thus, (which such Con­sequences evince it is not,) it were bet­ter for most Men they had never been Born; whether their conditition here be Prosperous, or Afflicted. For what Com­fort or quiet can any Man have in Plen­ty and Prosperity, when this frightful ap­prehension of an approaching end is e­ver present? and what Consolation can it yeild a Man, who is afflicted and Cala­mitous, and yet loves his Life above all [Page 53]things; to think that he shall not cease to be miserable, but by ceasing to be? And what is become of all Religion, if such a Thought be entertained? All Devotion to God is thereby extinguish'd, all the Restraints of Vice removed, the Flood­gates of Impiety opened, the Encourage­ments of Vertue, the Rewards of Holiness, the Foundation of Patience in Tribulation, and suffering for Righteousness sake, all at once taken away. Lord! Confirm my Belief of the invisible future state of Re­wards and Punishments! and let not Sad­ducism and Infidelity damp my Zeal in thy Service, or rob me of the Comforts of this Life, which if I have any solid ones, must suppose the hopes of a Better.

Let others therefore, O my Soul! who expect not an Everlasting Heaven be­yond the Grave, place their Affections on Earthly Things, and mind this World, as if there were no better, no other. Let them who doubt, or disbelieve the pro­mised Rewards of Eternity, take up with what they must shortly leave, and la­bour for the Bread that perisheth. But since I profess to believe and seek the Life Everlasting; let me daily entertain my self with the Hopes of it. and let all the flattering Dreams of what is desirable upon [Page 54]Earth, give place to nobler and better Thoughts. Let me derive my principal Joy, from the Promise and Expectation of that future Felicity, and endeavour nothing more than a meetness to partake of it. O my God, my God! thou art my Life, and Joy, and Portion; in Thee, and in thy Love, all my Desires, and Hopes are answered, and all my Wants suppli­ed. However Evil this World is made by Sin, yet thou art the infinite and su­pream Good. How mutable, how un­certain, how perishing soever are all sub­lunary things; yet thou art the Rock of Ages, the Fountain of Everlasting Life, and hast appointed another World, and another Life, when this is ended, where­in thou wilt be better known, and loved, and served, and honoured, and commu­nicate thy self more abundantly than now, to Those, the Desire of whose Souls is to­wards thee, that believe and love thee, that partake of thine Image, and are de­voted to thy Fear. The Assurance of this and nothing else, will answer the Ob­jection, of the present Vanity and Misery we are subject to.

SECT. XII.

HAth divine Patience added one year more to the number of my Days, when so many others were removed by Death the last Year? Others, whom a few Months since I knew in vigorous health; wiser, stronger, more likely to live, and to answer the ends of Life, than me; some of them, my near Relations, and useful Friends, in whose Converse I took delight, and promised my self ad­vantage by their Company, and Exam­ples; but they are taken, and I am left. Thy Holy Will, O Lord! is done: and they, who were prepared, are infinite Gainers by this my loss. Quicken my Preparations, by following their Piety, to meet them in thy Heavenly Kingdom. Let thy long-suffering lead me to Re­pentance; [Page 56]and suffer me not to slight thy warning, by the Death of others, to expect my own. Lord! cure my Earth­ly-mindedness, and practical Unbelief; and by all such admonitions of thy Pro­vidence, teach me to possess, and use this World, as knowing I must shortly leave it; and let not the thoughts of my Mortality wear off, as soon as the Fune­ral of my Friends is over.

Every year some or other of our Ac­quaintance drop into the Grave, we attend them thither, and lament, it may be, for a few days, their departure and remo­val; but consider not, that others will e're be long do the same for us; it may be before this year is ended. Oh! how soon do we forget our deceased Friends, and our selves, who are likewise dying! and count upon a long Life, which we can­not reasonably expect; and hug the en­joyments of this transitory World, as if our present State would last for ever! Will nothing but our own Dissolution, ef­fectually convince us of our mistake, and folly, in this particular?

Though the Arrows of Death fly con­tinually round about us; sometimes over our Heads, when Superiours are taken away; sometimes fall at our Feet, when [Page 57]Children and Servants, and Inferiours die; sometimes on our left Hand, when an Enemy is cut off; and while I am pleased with that, in that very hour, it may be, another Arrow on our right hand, strikes the Friend of our Bosom and Delight. And can we see all this, that great and small, high and low, friends and foes are all Vanity, and drop down dead round about us; and shall we not consider, that we are as Vain as they, and must shortly follow? Shall we not by a Christian Chymistry, extract Spirits out of these dead Bones? and by these Exam­ples learn the end of all Men, and lay it to Heart?

Whenever I see the Funeral of ano­ther, let me think thus with my self; why might not I have been that Man or Woman, that is now carried to the Grave? If we had been compared a few days since, 'tis probable I should have been thought as likely to have been his Monitor, by dying first, as he mine. By such an Improvement of these warnings, the request of the rich Man to Abraham were in great measure granted; for 'tis a call from the dead that speaks loudly to us, to consider our selves, and prepare in time for so great a Change: and say, [Page 58]as the Prophet to Hezekiah, Set thine house in Order, for thou shalt die.

Can we look upon a Deaths Head, and not remember what we shall shortly be? may not much be learnt from its common Motto? Sum quod Eris, Fueramque quod Es. I am that, which thou shalt shortly be, and have been that, which thou art now: that is, I have been as gay and jocund, as brisk and merry, as proud and vain, as rich and great, as careless and secure, as honourable and as much esteemed, as beautiful and as well beloved, as witty and as learned, as Thou art or canst be now. I valued my self as much upon my Estate, and Trade, and Health, and Beau­ty; upon my Education, Profession, Im­ployments, Parts, Friends, Family, &c. as thou hast ever done, or canst do: I li­ved in ease and pleasure, in mirth and jollity; I minded the World as much, and indulged my self as much in sensuality, and was as careful of my Body, pampered and pleased my Flesh, as much as thou; and thought as little of a sudden Death, and prepared as little for such a change, as thou dost: But now my dry Bones are lookt upon with contempt and scorn, but thou shalt shortly return to dust, and be as vile as I am.

It cannot but affect us, did we consi­der it, to see divers snatch'd away in their Youth, and outward Prosperity; and in the midst of their Sin and Folly, without any visible signs of true Repentance: Or in terrible anguish and horror for their past crimes: And yet how few do take the warning, carefully to prevent the like unhappiness? O Lord, preserve those strong Convictions, those serious Thoughts, those holy Resolutions, those lively Ap­prehensions of the Life to come, of the E­vil of sin, and the Terrors of thy wrath, which the sight of dying persons hath at any time awakened in my Soul! O the Eloquence of a dying Sinner, to per­swade to Repentance! Even when he hath lost his Speech, and lies gasping, and trembling, on a bed of sickness; breath­ing out his last faint breath, and passing into the other world, to answer for the Crimes and Follies of a wicked Life: Lord! revive these thoughts upon my Soul, and let me feel the power and in­fluence of them, in the hour of Tempta­tion, and in every time of need; and let the consideration of the death of Be­lievers, the Blessedness they are thereby entred into, and the Happiness they are possessed of, quicken my desires and dili­gence [Page 60]to prepare to follow. When I think were they are, and what they are doing, what is their work, and what their state, what their continual imployment, and what their enjoyments, and how different from ours; I cannot but wish to be with them, to be as they are, and do as they do; to know, and love, and praise God as they. They are not hin­dred by such a clog as this Body is to us; or tempted by their senses, appetite and fancy, to sin against Him: They complain not of a seducing Flesh, unruly Passions, low and disordered thoughts; of tempo­ral Afflictions, spiritual Desertions, the snares of the World, and the malice and subtilty of the Devil: We who are Pil­grims and Travellers are exposed to these difficulties, and storms which they are freed from. They are now rejoycing in the light of God's Countenance, and shall never question his love more, while we are in Tears and Sorrows, groaning to be delivered.

But think, O my Soul! that They were lately such as We are now. They were members of the militant Church, before they entred into Joy and Triumph. They had their conflicts and difficulties, their hour of Temptation, and time of Trial, as [Page 61]we have ours. They were slandered, and persecuted, and sadned, and disappoin­ted, as their Followers are: They went to Heaven the same way, and got the victory after the same manner, by Re­pentance, and Faith, and humble perse­vering Obedience. They were once Im­perfect as we are now; and complained of the Body of Sin and Death, and strug­lings of unmortified lust, as we do: And were sometimes in the dark about their interest in the promise, and walked hea­vily by the hiding of God's face, and in­dured Temptation, even as we. And as we have nothing to do, or suffer, but what they met with, we have the same Encouragement, that administred to their support; the same God and Saviour, the same way and rule, the same Assistance, by the aids of his Holy Spirit offered to us; the same promises, and the same rewards proposed, which they enjoyed, first in faith and hope, and afterwards in fruiti­on. Yea they passed through the dark valley, and so must we: Their Earthly tabernacle was dissolved, and so must ours be. We must expect to go the same way to Rest and Glory, and wait God's time for our admission. We must finish first the work, which God hath for us to do [Page 62]and suffer, and then all Tears shall be wiped from our eyes, we shall grieve no more, we shall sin no more, but be as the Angels in Heaven, or as the Spirits of the Just made Perfect.

SECT. XIII.

WIth what Humility, Mortificati­on, and Self-denial, what Seri­ousness, Watchfulness, and resolved Con­stancy, would every Christian Live on Earth, did he act always under the in­fluence and power of a confirmed Faith, concerning the Life to come? We should not then grudge at a little labour, or boggle at a few difficulties in our Way. What tho' I meet with injuries and affronts, hardships and inconveni­ences, being now in a Forreign Country, and every day I live, one Days journey nearer my Eternal Home! Shall I not patiently bear momentany Sorrows, while I believe I am hastening to Eternal [Page 63]Joy? Did I look more to the Everlasting World, should not I make the pleasing of God, in order to my Eternal welfare, the great business of my Life? Should I not serve the Lord with more fervency of Spirit, and be better fortified against the fears of Man, who can but hurt and kill the Body, nor that neither, with­out the permission of God? Shuld I not order all my affairs, answer all Tempta­tions, mortifie inward Lusts, live in the Exercise of Grace, and in circumspect persevering Obedience, in order to it? Should I not watch more over my Heart, and Lips, and Ways, be more diligent to trim my Lamps, more crucified to this world, more careful to call my self fre­quently to an account, and renew my Re­pentance? Would not my Converse be more useful and edifying, my Discourses more savory and full of Religion, my Prayers to God more humble and earnest, my Charity to Men more unfeigned and extensive, and my Preparations every way more suitable to such a Faith, and to such Apprehensions of an Everlasting State? Could we carry the thoughts of Eternity about with us every day, and often admit them in our civil and secular affairs, did we repeat it frequently to our [Page 64]selves, at least every Morning, as soon as we are awake, that we are near Eterni­ty; this grain of Incense would perfume the whole Temple, and be an Anti­dote against inward Lust, and impure thoughts, against the infection and defile­ment of bad Company, and the snares of worldly Business, and do much to prevent vain and sensual actions, and to cure vain affections.

Did we believe it, and believe it near, should we not take as much pains to se­cure Eternal Life, as we see Men do to get riches? Should we not use the same diligence, care, and circumspection, the same prudent foresight, watchfulness, and perseverance, to prevent Everlast­ing Destruction as others do to provide a­gainst Poverty, and to live in Plenty a little while on Earth? Should we not rejoyce as much in the promise and hopes of it, as others do in the prospect and expectation of some Earthly Advan­tage? Lord! I confess and bewail the weakness of my Faith. How often have I concluded, and said, that Heaven alone is the place of Happiness, and yet my carnal Heart is too much affected with Earthly Things! How often have I re­resolved, (upon the conviction of the certainty [Page 65]of the Eternal World,) to mind this less, and to affect and seek it no more, as I have done! and yet my foolish Heart is han­kering after it still. O crucifie my Affe­ctions to things below! and let the be­lieving Thoughts of the next Life, ren­der me victorious over all the Tempta­tions of this. Pardon and cure the stag­gering trembling Thoughts of an unbe­lieving Heart, by greater measures of a lively Faith. That my desires may be strong and urgent, and my diligence and stedfastness in the way of Truth, be some way correspondent to this important Article. Let me live only for Eternity, hope for nothing but Eternity, design and intend nothing as my chief end, but Eternity, and seek and mind nothing in comparison with Eternity! Did we be­lieve it, how would every thing in this World be lookt upon as eligible, or fit to be refused, as it is like to be an help, or an hindrance, with reference to Eter­nity! we should then endeavour to do no­thing unbecoming such an Expectation. Considering this World as our Passage, and the invisible future World as our abiding Country, where we are to dwell for ever; whatever we meet with here, whether sweet or bitter, easy or troublesome, plea­sing [Page 66]or ungrateful, we should not much matter, but as it relates to hereafter.

And were I certain I should have no longer time of Trial in order to this E­ternal State, than this one year, which is now begun: If a Messenger from God should convincingly assure me of it; what would I not do to prepare for Death, and secure the interests of Eternity? With what remorse and deep Repentance should I reflect on the Follies of my past Life? What what importunate cries should I beg Forgiveness? How patiently should I bear Calamity, for so short a time? How little should I value the favours or frowns of Men? How circumspect, to improve every Season of doing and receiving good? How careful to avoid Temptation, and how reso­lute in resisting it? Did I verily believe I had no longer time to live on Earth, than this one Year at most; How insipid would be the offer of carnal Mirth, vain Pastime, sensual Diversions, idle Company? &c. How should I value every Hour, every inch of my little Time, under the Appre­hension that Eternity is at hand? O my Soul! Shall I make no provision against the Possibility of such a case? Is not my change as certain, as if it were this year, as if it were to Morrow? Tho' I am not [Page 67]certain it is so near, nor certain but it may be. Let me then seek first the King­dom of God and his Righteousness: Let me fix it well, and make it clear, that I have secured my great Concern, and am ready for a sudden summons.

SECT. XIV.

I May dye this Year; then all my Cares and Fears, if I am Rich, all my Sor­row and Calamities (as to this World,) if I am Poor, will die too. I may dye this Year; then I shall have no more Enemies, no more Sickness, and which is infinitely better, I shall Sin no more. I must shortly die, it may be, this Year; but there is no other way to come to a blessed Life, but by dying; and my Saviour hath died for me, and he that believes in him, shall never see Death. He lives who was once dead, yea, he lives for evermore; and hath promised, that I shall be with him to behold his Glory. He hath the Keys of Death and Hell: He is the Resurre­ction and the Life; he hath removed the [Page 68]sting of Death; and I need not fear a conquered Enemy. If I dye this year, I must quit the Company of all my dear­est Friends on Earth, but I shall go to better Company above; and if they are the Friends of Christ, we shall shortly meet again, and love one another in a bet­ter manner than now, and never more be parted.

I may dye this Year; my Friends and Enemies may dye too. Let me enjoy the one as mortal dying Persons, that must e're long leave me, or I them; and not fear the other, who may so soon Perish, and quickly be uncapable of doing me or others Mischief.

I may dye this Year; Let me not then think much of Temporal Sufferings, of a­ny Evils which may so soon be over. Oh! what would condemned Sinners in the other World give, to be able to believe, and say so of their Sufferings?

I may dye this Year; and can I wonder that I am sometimes Sick and in Pain, and that my Body is out of order? Am I not Mortal, and dwell in an house of Clay, which must shortly moulder into Dust; and is it any thing strange, that such a crasy Building doth sometime shake, and need repair, and threaten a dissolution? [Page 69]'Tis a greater wonder, I am any time well: That such a Body, compounded of so many little parts; and so easily disor­dered by innumerable accidents, should be in Health; is hardly less to be admi­red, than that an Instrument of a thou­sand strings should be kept in Tune.

I thank thee, O heavenly Father, for the many advantages of Sickness, to wea­ken the power of Sin, to humble my Pride, and cure my Worldliness and Sensuality, to reduce me from wandering, to empty me of Self-conceit, to awaken the consi­deration of Death and Judgment, to im­press the Thoughts of the vanity of this World, and the Eternity of the next; to assist me to mortifie the Flesh, to rule my Passions, to exercise Patience, and quicken me in Prayer, and try my Faith and Love, and excite my diligence to redeem time, and convince me of the Worth and Un­certainty of it; and thereby promote my Preparations for my final change. The Great Apostle by dying daily, had as ma­ny victories over this World, as he li­ved Days. Oh! that I might so far walk by the same Rule, as every day to think of providing for my last; and in Health to do that, which in Sickness I shall wish I had done!

I may dye this Year; It may be by some tedious painful Sickness, some trouble­some and loathsome Disease. But God hath promised his Grace shall be suffici­ent; he will make my Bed in my Sick­ness, and put under his everlasting Arms for my support, and not suffer me to be tempted above what I am able; he will encrease my Patience, and carry me thro' the pangs of Death, and the dark Valley, and when Heart and Flesh fail, be the strength of my Heart, and my Portion for Ever.

I may dye this Year; What if it should be by an hand of Violence; if for Righte­ousness sake, in defence of the Truth, for a good Cause, and a good Consci­ence, and my Peace be made with God, and I am accused for doing well, or inno­cent of the Evil which is laid to my charge; there is ground enough for en­couragement and support. Thousands of my Betters have met with the like, whose names are precious and renowned. In­numerable Christians have dyed by the Sentence of a Judge, with more Chear­fulness and Joy, than others, or it may be, than they themselves would have done, by the sentence of the Physician. The Torture of many Diseases is unspeakably [Page 71]more formidable, as to the meer Pain; and for all else, the Righteous Lord who loveth Righteousness, will clear my In­tegrity, if it may best subserve his own Great and Holy Ends: At least, he will stand by and help me, when all forsake me; and if He speak Peace, and give in­ward Consolation, who can speak Trouble? And his final Judgment, which is near at hand, will distribute rewards and punish­ments to all, according to their works.

Suppose farther, that I should want a Scpulcher, after Death. There is no­thing I could better be without. If God receive my Soul, and will raise my Body at the last day, whether it putrifie and consume under ground, or above it, is no great matter. They who are alive will be more concerned in that, than I shall be; Graves are for the sake of the Living rather than the Dead. The Sun, the Rain, the Air, Birds, Beasts, Worms, will all contribute to give me Burial, if Men deny it. The only difference is, that it will be a little longer e're I am buried. If my Soul rest in the Bosom of my Saviour, and by presevering in the love and practice of the Truth, I have secured my Reputation with wise and good Men, I need not be sollicitous [Page 72]what become of my Body. My Almighty Judge will raise me a glorious Body, like his own, and reunite it to my Soul, as easily, as certainly, as for any of those, whose Bodies were preserved in Caves and Vaults, in proud Sepulchers, and under stately Monuments.

I may dye this Year; and shall not then have the satisfaction to see my Children or nearest Kindred Educated and Provi­ded for, setled and disposed of. But is not the everliving God the same? Can­not he as well take care of them when I am gone, as now? answer all my Prayers after my decease? and exercise that Fa­therly Care, Wisdom, and Love; which shall dispose of their Conditions, save them from Temptations, and supply all their Wants, and exceed all my Desires, in reference to them? and fulfil his Co­venant-promise from Generation to Ge­neration, to the Childrens Children of them that fear him? O how weak is my Faith, that cannot trust God in so com­mon and plain a case!

Lastly, I may dye this Year; and not live to see the ruin of the Antichristian Kingdom, and Interest, and the accom­plishment of many Excellent Promises, which concern the Rest, and Peace, and [Page 73]Purity, and Glory of the Churches of Christ on earth, in the latter days. But have I not deserved by my provoking Unbelief, Ingratitude, and Disobedience, to dye in the Wilderness, and not be­hold the promised Land, or see the Peace of Jerusalem? And will not the struglings of Satan to support Babylon, infer a dismal night of darkness and di­stress, before the expected Morning of Deliverance? So that it may now, if e­ver, be truly said, Henceforth, Blessed are the Dead, who dye in the Lord. And if God will take me to himself in the other World, I cannot possibly be a loser: Tho' I should not see the Beginnings of a New Heaven, and a New Earth, in this. However I rejoyce in Hope, and pray incessantly for the Resurrection of the Witnesses, and the rebuilding of Sion, and the more plentiful effusion of the Holy Spirit, (the great comprehensive Pro­mise of the latter Times) to effect a glo­rious Kingdom for Christ on Earth: And my Faith assures me, I shall hereafter see the Son of God revealed from Heaven, cloathed with Majesty, sitting on a Cloud, leading the Heavenly Host, raising the Dead by his powerful Voice, summoning all the World to appear to Judgment, [Page 74]gathering his Elect, and finally destroy­ing Death, and him that had the Power of it, the Devil, condemning the wicked to everlasting Destruction, but acquit­ting, honouring, and rewarding his poor Members, with infinite and Eternal Bles­sedness.

SECT. XV.

I May not live to the end of this Year; God in his Providence having called me abroad, I may never see my Native Country more. Let me still remember, O my Soul! that where ever I am, I am travelling towards the Grave, and pas­sing to another World: That I may live in all places, as a Pilgrim and Stranger here on Earth; with Affections suited to my condition, becoming one who is travelling in a Strange Land. Let me bear the Inconveniences I may meet with in this World, as Strangers in their Travels are wont to do. Let me not re­pine at the ill Accommodations of an Inn, where I am to lodge but a night or two; [Page 75]but encourage my self with the assurance of better Entertainment at home, when my Pilgrimage is ended, and my Jour­ney over.

One of my dearest Holy Friends, and Fellow Travellers, (whose memory will be ever precious, ^(g) with those who knew him) quickly arrived to his Jour­neys end, and is entred into Rest be­times. Which of his Companions shall next follow, we know not, or how soon. Lord! Make me apprehend the nearness of my change in every place; and if I am prepared for dying, no matter where it be. There is no one Country farther from the Presence of God than another. The whole World may be considered as one Great House, and the several King­doms and Countries of it, but as different Apartments in the same House; and they who tarry at home, are no more exempt from Death, than they who travel a­broad.

The Earth is the Lords, and the fullness thereof; I can go no where to be out of his Territories, I shall still tread upon my Father's Ground. I had rather be [Page 76]an Israelite in a Wilderness with the Pre­sence of God, than a Courtier in idola­trous Aegypt. Abraham, the Father of the Faithful, and the Friend of God, was banished from his own Country; and should I never set foot again on my na­tive Soyl, there is no reason of mur­muring against my God, who hath dealt thus with many of his Favourites. And while I have been in a strange Land, he hath not suffered me to feel the wants and necessities, and heart of a Stranger. Among a People of a strange Language he can, and doth provide for me all things richly to enjoy. I may set up my Ebenezer, hitherto hath God supplied all my wants.

The Presence of my Gracious Father is every where the same; in some mea­sure, Blessed be my God, I have hitherto found it so. And may I not rejoyce in God in a Desert, though all the World should forsake me; though all the World should be against me? Should I have no other Friend or Helper; is not God, an infinite God Enough? and without his Favour and Presence, what can all this World do for me? If I am sick, and in danger of Death, among my Relations and Friends; if the comforts of the Almigh­ty [Page 77]do not refresh and delight my Soul, they cannot: And if I want not these in my last Agonies, no matter in what part or corner of the Earth I breath my last. If the word and promise of God be my Foundation, an holy Hope my Anchor, Christ my Pilot, and Heaven my Coun­try, I shall not fail of being landed there at last. Suffer me not to forsake thee, O Heavenly Father! while I live; and do not thou forsake me in my last Hour; and let it come when, and where thou wilt! If my blessed Saviour will receive my de­parting Soul at Death, I am not sollici­tous in what Country or part of the Earth it be.

And that I may not be unwilling in the flower of my Age and Time, in Youth and Strength, to leave this World; let me think often, that no one age or part of Life is more priviledged against the stroke of Death than another. If I have done my work betimes, as my deceased Fellow Traveller had, is it not better to receive the blessed Recompence, than to to tarry longer, in a World of Sin and Suf­fering, absent from the Lord? Shall I not thereby escape a multitude of Temp­tations, Sins, and Sorrows, which others by living longer are exposed to? If my [Page 78]Peace be made with God, what should make me willing to live at this distance from him? What should render this World so desirable, where God is so dis­honoured, where I am so often tempted to displease him, and so often yield to such Temptations? And may I not fear lest I should fall into such scandalous and grievous sins, that may bring a publick reproach on the Gospel of Christ, and sadden the Hearts of all my Acquaintance, who love the Lord Jesus in sincerity? By dying early, I shall contract less guilt, and commit less sin, and see and feel less Sorrow than others who live longer. And tho' I should maintain my Integrity, yet in this World my highest love and obe­dience to God, and my sweetest Commu­nion with him, is but imperfect. How many Impediments and Diversions do I daily meet with, that deaden my Heart to Heavenly Contemplations and Affe­ctions? What disappointments, and sor­rowful disasters, to convince me that this is not the place of Rest and Happi­ness? What smart afflictions may some of my Relations prove? What dangerous Snares may attend me in the remaining Portion of my Time? What Oppositi­on and Hatred from Men may the sted­fast [Page 79]professing of the Truth, and Fide­lity to God expose me to? what Publick, National Calamities may I have my share in, &c.

But if I consider Old Age it self, which we do desire to reach; what and how many are the Infirmities and Griefs, and troublesome Circumstances which attend that State, which dying young will pre­vent? Are not most Men, who reach a very great old Age, helpless Objects of Pity? A Burthen to themselves, and to all about them? And (which commonly happens,) may I not then be as unwilling to dye, as at present? As loth then to leave the World as now, tho' in a manner it will have left me? For how many Old Men, past the Relish of Sensual Plea­sures, are yet inordinately fond of a lon­ger Life!

Have I not been told by Heathens, as well as Christians; that 'tis not the length of time, but it's improvement, that doth really make a Long Life? If I have an­swered the Ends for which I were born, 'tis not too soon to dye. No Man ever miscarried as to his Everlasting Interest, because his Life was Short, but Evil. He that is prepared for Death, he that dyes in the Lord, hath lived long enough, and [Page 80]should thank God for a speedy Call to the Possession of that Felicity, which the Ho­liest Saints on Earth desire and breath after. Gideon lost nothing by returning from Victory, while the Sun was yet high. He hath fought long enough who hath gained the Victory. If I have wrought but a few Hours in a Vineyard, and done but little Service for my Lord and Ma­ster; and yet am dismist, and rewarded, before the rest of my Fellow-Labourers; shall I repine, and think my Lord doth not befriend me? If he hath any farther Service for me, he will prolong my Days, and make me Diligent, I hope, and con­tented. Otherwise I pray he would make me ready to dye, and make me willing, and desirous to depart this Life. For to be only content to dye, that I may be per­fectly Holy, and fully Blessed, is methinks too low for a Christian, who acts like him­self; believing the Certainty of his avowed Principles and Hopes, and knowing, that While we are present in the Body, we are ab­sent from the Lord.

SECT. XVI.

ALL that is in the World, saith the Apostle, is the Lust of the Flesh, the Lust of the Eyes, and the Pride of Life. The Dust and Ashes of our own Mortality, duly considered and applied; will help to deaden, and extinguish each of these. By Pride of Life, we lift up our selves against Heaven, and despise our Maker; by the Lust of the Flesh, we overlove and indulge the Body, and study to gratifie the sensual Appetite: By the Lust of the Eyes, our Desires are immode­rate after Temporal and External Goods. The thought of our approaching End hath a Tendency to oppose and mortifie these Lusts; to humble us before God; to take us off from the inordinate Love of the Body; and to moderate our Passions to Earthly Things. It may help us against Pride, by shewing us the infinite distance, between the Eternal Self-sufficient God, [Page 82]and such poor Dust as we; who are but of Yesterday, and if he uphold us not, and maintain our Souls in Life shall be laid in the Dust to Morrow: It will mind us of his Justice against Sin, the Parent of Death, and of all the Miseries of our mortal State; and convince us of our Weakness to resist his Will, or avoid his Wrath. As to our fond Affection to the Body, it may instruct us, that it deserves not to be so much accounted of; it will open our Eyes to discern the Preference of our immortal Souls; and what Con­cerns them, to the Interest of a perish­ing Body. It may convince us, that we are Cruel and unkind to our very Bodies, by overloving them, because we thereby contribute to their Eternal Sufferings; and so teach us to love and use our Bo­dies, as Servants to our Souls in this World! and as expecting to share in Glory with them, after the Resurrection. It may also help to moderate our Desires after Earthly Good, and so cure the Lust of the Eyes, by letting us see the Vanity, Uncertainty, and short Duration of these Things, and their Insufficiency to make us Happy, and give us true Content.

The Thoughts of an Approaching Change may, if any thing will do it, [Page 83]damp the Mirth of the Luxurious Epicure, and strike him into a fit of Trembling, as did Belshazzar's Hand-writing on the Wall. It may discover the Distraction of living in Pleasure, and of Care to please the Senses, and the fleshly Appetite, when the End is so near. It may like­wise check the Folly of Ambitious Designs; that Men should make so much ado to get into slippery Places, from whence they may so easily fall. Where being puft up with vain Applause, they forget themselves, and their latter End, 'till their Life and Glory expire together: Where are now the Great, and Mighty, and Honourable, who have made such a Noise in the World? What is now the Difference between the Dust of an Alexan­der or Caesar, and that of their meanest Slaves or Captives? Could their Digni­ties and Earthly Glory preserve any of them, from the Stroke of Death, or the Judgment of God, or without Repen­tance, from his condemning Sentence?

Think, O my Soul! how little it will shortly signifie, whether I have been known and honoured among Men or no; any farther than God may be glorified by it. How should it suppress Vain-Glory? to think of being one day esteemed, and [Page 84]worshipt, reverenced, and applauded by dying Men, and laid in the Grave the next? Let me rather seek that Glory and Honour, to which Immortality is annext; and labour to be accepted with God, at whose Bar I must be judged, endeavour­ing to keep the Testimony of a good Conscience; and then it is not much whe­ther I pass through Good Report or Evil Report; no Contempt, or Frowns, or Threatnings of Men need then discou­rage me. Tho' I should be trampled on by the Foot of Pride, while others are happy in a Dream for a little while; and it may be have a prosperous Passage to Damnation; I'll rather thank God, for delivering me from their Temptations, and giving me the Opportunity, and Call, to hasten my Preparations for a Better World.

Let God dispose of my Condition here, and Reputation too, as best shall please his Sovereign Will; only be pleased to keep me upright, and to preserve me from Everlasting Shame and Confusion of Face, after the general Resurrection, and final Judgment. Vouchsafe me a Portion now in thine approving Love, and own me for Thine at last, in the great and terrible Day of Reckoning; [Page 85]that then I may hear the Blessed Euge, and enter into my Lord's Joy?

SECT. XVII.

ARE the Years of my Life but few, and they hastening to a Period? and may this be my last? Let me not then greedily covet Riches and Abun­dance, and waste my little time to scrape together large Provisions, for many years to come; when I have no Assurance to see the End of this. Is it becoming such a Belief, to toyl from Day to Day, that I may lay up that which I must so soon leave? As if I were to spend an Eternity here on Earth, and in the mean while neglect the One thing necessary. Am I not upon the Shore of Eternity? May not the [Page 86]next Tide carry me off? And shall I spend my whole Life in Diversions from the main Business of it? Have I nothing else to do, but to gather Shells, (if they were Pearls, the absurdity were still the same) and pile them upon Heaps, till I am snacht away past all Recovery? Shall I be regardless of an Eternal State, and run the Hazard of being undone for ever, by sollicitous Care about pretended Necessa­ries for a long Abode on Earth? [Much less for Superfluities;] when I am not cer­tain of the Possession, this one Year? Shall I magnifie and admire what is so soon to be parted with? Value my self upon these Things, so as to Despise those that have less, and-Envy such as have more? and suffer my Mind to be distempered, and my Passions immoderate on every Change of these things?

Tho' I know besides my own Morta­lity, that to inforce the Argument, there is a Principle of Corruption in all these Things; that our very Manna here, in a little while will stink; and Bread, which is the Staff of Life, moulder; our richest Garments wax old, and rot; Silver and Gold rust, and the greatest Beauty wither, and every thing that is Earthly, decay [Page 87]and perish. And shall not this teach me to sit loose from all such things? Can I imagine, that in my last Hour it will be easier to part with much, than little? Or better in the Day of Judgment, to have a great Estate to answer for, than a lesser One?

We read concerning the Patriarch Abraham, (who rightly understood the Transitory Nature of Riches, and his own mutable Condition,) that the only Pur­chase he made with his Riches, was a Grave; chusing to take Possession of the Land promised him, rather by a Mark of his parting with it, than of his possessing it. Did I think oftner and more seri­ously, O my Soul! of tarrying here but a little while; I should more easily be per­swaded, that a little of this World were sufficient to carry me through it. I should consider more that my Heaven-born Soul is made and designed for another, an Endless World: And therefore, should not so far forget his own People, and Fathers House; as eagerly to pursue and seek what is suited only to the Body, for a little while; and whereof a little with Contentment will be suffici­ent.

The same Reflection may be useful to contract our Thoughts to present Duty; that we may not perplex our Minds with long Designs and Projects; which if we dye this Year, will come to nothing. Our great Business in this World is ad­apted to the little Portion of Time, which is allowed us. Not that good De­signs for the Publick Benefit, may not be begun by one, and finisht by others; or that we are not obliged, prudently to provide for those who shall come after us, by attempting many Things of proba­ble Advantage to Posterity. But consider­ing the Shortness, and Uncertainty of Life, not only should the most Necessary Things be first minded, and not put off by prose­cuting such Designs, as may signifie some­what to Others, when we are Dead: But we should not now omit that which we may hope to compass our selves; to be­gin such Things, whose Accomplishment must depend on the Pleasure of our Suc­cessors. Consideration and faithful Coun­sel would in this case have prevented the fruitless Expence of many Mens Time and Money; which if otherwise employ­ed, might have turned to good Account to Themselves and Others.

And this heightens our Folly, that while we pursue great Projects in re­ference to this World, and dye without effecting them, our Preparations for Eter­nity are neglected; and so we are sud­denly cut off in the midst of our Folly, and all our Thoughts perish. How ea­sily, how soon may they do so! The Difference and Distance between Death and Life, being no more than that of a Candle lighted, from its being blown out; and if it is exposed to all Winds, how quickly may that happen?

SECT. XVIII.

IN this World we begin a Year, and quickly come to the End of it; and e're long the little Number of our Years, and Days will be expired. But when Death conveys us into the World of [Page 90]Spirits, the Day of Eternity shall never be closed with an Evening. Of how fear­ful Consequence is that Death, by which an Eternity must be decided! What At­tention, what Seriousness, what Diligence, what Care, doth the Decision of so impor­tant a Matter call for? ETERNAL! What will be the next Word, O my Soul! how much am I concerned to know it! Will it be Blessedness or Misery? Will it be Life or Death? This one Word is the Joy of Angels, and the Horror of Devils; the Unspeakable Delight of Blessed Saints, and the Confusion and Despair of Condemned Sinners.

At the Creation of the World, Time got the start of us, and was five days elder than we; but our Immortal Souls shall endure beyond the utmost Limits of Time, and last as long as the Everlasting Father of Spirits, of whose Duration there is no End. Shall I then exist and live, though my Body perish and see Corruption? Shall my Soul, my Self exist beyond the Grave, in Felicity or Misery; and that for ever, and according to my present Actions? What am I then most concerned to mind? What am I to chuse? What am I most to fear, to wish, [Page 91]to do? What is a Shadow of Honour and Reputation among dying Men? What are a few Drops of fleshly Pleasure, for a Moment, to Eternal Rivers of Pleasure, at God's right Hand? What are the suf­ferings of an Hour or two, to the Pains and Anguish of Eternity? What can the World, Flesh, or Devil give me compa­rable to Eternal Life? What can I suffer in the way of Holiness, that may be set in the Balance against an Everlasting Hell? And yet how often, O my Soul! how boldly, how unconcernedly, how foolishly do I hazard the One, and forfeit the Other; for the Sins and Vanities of this World! Whereas one Prospect of Eternity, should make every thing that is Temporal, appear little in my Eyes; The highest Elevations of Earthly Greatness, Abundance of Riches, the Great Affairs, Business, and Employments of the World, Pomp, and Splendor, and Reputation, and all that now flatters the Senses, and the Vanity of Mankind

Oh! that I could but live, as believing and expecting an Eternal State! as ha­ving it in my Eye, managing all my Affairs with a Visible Reference to it; dis­covering to all the World, by my Be­haviour [Page 92]and Deportment, that I do in earnest believe it certain; for be it never so Certain, if I do not apprehend, and consider it as such, it will no more affect me than a Fable. Neither is it enough to consider it as certain, but as near: For the most weighty, the most terrible things, apprehended as at a great distance, will little move. Thinking of the long Inter­val, between the advantage of being ex­empted from such Evils for so long a time; will please me more than such di­stant Calamities will affright.

Let me therefore, endeavour to impress the consideration of Eternity, as at hand, more deeply on my Heart, that I may walk, and live, discourse, and pray, and demean my self in every thing, as near an unchangeable State. Am I not con­vinced that this is certain, from the na­ture and operations of my Soul, from the reflections of Conscience, from the Righteousness of God in his Government of the World, from the present unequal distributions of Good and Evil by his Providence, and from the plain and fre­quent assertions of his Revealed Will? I have nothing to object, nothing to re­ply; but I find a necessity of inculcating [Page 93]and urging the consideration of it, in or­der to its influence. I find it needful to reflect often, how near I am to such an endless State; that in one Instant, by Death, I enter upon it: And that this Instant may be as near me, as my next Thoughts. That the holy Scripture de­scribes, the two contrary Conditions af­ter Death, (and every Man and Woman in the World shall share in one of them) as both Everlasting; the one, by Eter­nal Life, Eternal Glory, an incorruptible Crown, that fadeth not away, an incorrup­tible Inheritance, an House Eternal in the Heavens, &c. the other, by unquenchable Fire, a Prison whence no escape, Eternal Damnation, Everlasting Burning, Everlast­ing Punishment, Everlasting Destruction, a Worm that never dies, wrath that is ever to come, blackness of darkness for ever, ever, &c.

Think, O my Soul! that in One of these two contrary States, I must abide for ever, in endless Joy, or Sorrow: Blessed in the Presence of God, or for ever ba­nished from it. And whoever thou art that readest this, apply it seriously to thy self, 'tis thine own case. Yea, I tell thee from God, that Holiness of Heart [Page 94]and Life is absolutely Necessary to the former, and that without it, thou shalt never see his Face; but be punished with Everlasting Destruction, from the Pre­sence of his Glory.

Is this an Unquestionable Truth? O let me consider it, till I feel the Power and Efficacy, of so Important a Principle! let the Impression be Deep and Lasting! let it pierce and enter into my very Soul! to cool the Heats of Lust, to quench Sen­sual and Earthly desires, and to mortifie all Inordinate Affections to this World; and fix my Resolutions to mind, and seek Eternal Life with all my Heart!

These are not difficult and perplexed Niceties, which wise and holy Men differ and disagree about. They are not Me­taphisical Subtleties, which few can un­derstand; but the express Word of God, and the daily Dictates of my own Reason and Conscience, which all Christians, and almost all Men in their Wits (except in an Hour of great Temptation) confess and own; or whether they will or no, are forced to expect and fear, if they are not in a Condition, to consider them with a joyful Hope.

Lord! cure the unbelieving Doubts concerning these Great Things, which notwithstanding the plainest Evidence, the Devil may at any time suggest! Iet a confirmed Faith, be the Reality of what is thus future; that my Soul may be, in­fluenc'd by them, as it is wont to be by Things present Let it be the Substance of Things hoped for, and the Evidence of Things unseen, and as yet at a Distance; as if the Day of Judgment were already come, and there were no intermediate Time to pass, between this and that.

O Eternity! Eternity! the more I con­sider it, the more unfathomable still I find it. Ʋnchangeable Blessedness, or re­mediless, endless Torments! An Eternal Blissful Day, or Everlasting Horror, Darkness, and Despair! Life or Death, Glory or Destruction, to last as long as the Immutable, Living God! None of the Patriarchs who lived longest, arrived to the period of a Thousand Years, which in comparison of God's Everlastingness, is set forth but as one day. But strictly considered, Millions of Years and Ages have no proportion with it; because no multiplication of them will amount to Eternity. Whereas one Hour hath some [Page 96]proportion to an hundred thousand years, because a certain number of Hours will amount to so many years. But no number of Years or Ages, never so often multiplied, will make up Eterni­ty: As no substraction of Millions of Years will lessen it; an entire Eternity will be still to come, and will ever be to come. When innumerable myriads of Years are past, Eternity shall then seem but to begin, because when as many more are over, it shall be as far from an end.

Oh! that the thoughts of Eternity may be powerful, and prevailing above all others! that I may Judge of every thing by its relation to it, by its influ­ence upon it! Chuse now, my Soul! whether Everlasting Joys, or Miseries, shall be thy Portion: But consider well, that thine Eternity is concerned in thy present choice; and that this choice must be pursued with stedfastness and con­stancy, as long as I live: And what are a few Years to prepare for an Eternal State? Were we obliged to spend se­veral hundred years, in serious, humble preparation for it, with the greatest strictness and severity of Life, during all [Page 97]that Time; it were infinitely less, than to spend an hour or two, in preparing for the greatest Dignity and Imploy on Earth, which can be enjoyed but for a few years at longest. For to these an hour hath some proportion; but an hun­dred or thousand years have hone; with an Everlasting Duration. Therefore to consider, how many years of toyl, and pains, and diligence, many bestow on the probable prospect of some Temporal Good, should reprove and shame, my negligence and remisness, in providing for Eternity.

SECT. XIX.

THE Fear of the Lord is the Begin­ning of Wisdom, the entrance into the way of Life, as it is ordinarily one of [Page 98]the first Means to awaken the Soul to a serious Concern for Eternity: Let me therefore first consider the Endless Pu­nishment of the Wicked, in the other World, before I enter upon the ravish­ing Prospect of the Blessedness of Hea­ven, promised to the Righteous. And with what serious Trembling should I think, of the Terrors of an Everlasting Destruction, which our Lord shall be re­vealed from Heaven to render, to All, who know not God; and obey not the Gospel. When the wicked shall go away into E­verlasting Punishment; as the Righte­ous into Life Eternal. The Dreadful­ness of that Punishment, the Endless Du­ration of it, joyned to the Consideration of its Unquestionable Certainty; de­serves the most Attentive Thoughts of every Man, who loves his Soul, and would manifest he doth so, by securing his greatest Interest.

The Description of that Misery, un­der Insupportable and Eternal Torments, demands more than a Transient View; because no words can sufficiently ex­press the Horror of that State. What is it, O my Soul! to be banished from the Blessed Sight, and Presence of God for [Page 99]ever, and all the Impressions of his Holy Image and Likeness? and to know that this is the Fruit of my own Choice, that I lost it by my own Fault and Folly; that I deserved to lose it; that the Sen­tence is as Just, as it is Irrecoverable? Who can fully imagine the dismal Des­pair of a Condemned Sinner, under the Anguish of a Guilty, Self-accusing Mind? while under the Stroke of God's Almigh­ty, Revenging Justice, with a Distincter View and Knowledge, than now, of God and his Excellencies; of himself, and his own Vileness and Malignity; which must greatly increase his Rage and Torment. Add to this, his being enraged by the Ac­cusations, and Cries of wicked Acquain­tance, and Relations; and his being mockt, and insulted over, and tortured, by ma­licious damned Spirits; with a clear Un­derstanding of that glorious Felicity he despised, refused, and forfeited; with a deep Sense of his former Madness, in preferring the Sinful Pleasures and Ad­vantages of this World; and this after so many Warnings, and Invitations, and Calls from God, to have prevented it; and never to be diverted one moment from the Consideration, Sense, and Feeling of [Page 100]his Misery, and the duration of it; to have all his Passions let loose, with the greatest violence, and nothing to satis­fie them; and continually to preserve, an Hell of wickedness and Horror in himself; and to endure the reproaches, convi­ctions, regrets, and stinging Reflections of Conscience, the gnawing Worm, which shall never die: Who can conceive the un­speakable misery of such an accursed State? So great Calamity, and yet Ever­lasting!

How long doth one Day or Night now seem, to a Man under some violent racking Pain, in any one part of his Bo­dy, tho' he be under the means for Cure, and have his Friends about him to pity, comfort, assist him, with the hopes of Ease in a little while, and the certain knowledge that it cannot last long? Oh! what then will be the dismal state of tormented ^(h) Sinners in Hell! How infinitely must it exceed, the most terri­ble idea we can now frame of it! to languish out a long Eternity, in that Gulph of Darkness and Despair, under [Page 101]unpitied, intolerable Torments, without Intermission, or Hope of End! Miseries without Measure! Judgment without Mercy! Pains and Sorrows intense, and yet endless! without the least Succour or Relief, Relaxation or Remedy, Dimi­nution or Change! without a Drop of Comfort, without a Moments Rest, with­out the smallest Beam of Light, or the least Glimmering of Hope! Perpetually dying, and never dead! under unsuf­ferable Wrath, which yet will be for ever Wrath to come! seeking Death, and never able to find it, but Eternally to endure all that Calamity, which the Con­junction of Death and Life together, can render dreadful!

What Groans and Cries, will these Thoughts and these Sufferings, wring from their Hearts? But no Refuge will then be found, no Excuses admitted, no Prayers, no Entreaties will then prevail, no Tears move Pity. He that made them, will shew them no Mercy, and he that formed them, will shew them no Fa­vour. 'Tis Never, Never, that is the killing Word, that breaks the Heart of those hopeless Prisoners, in the Place of Torment. When once deliver'd over [Page 102]to that Prison of God's Wrath, they shall no longer be Prisoners of Hope. Judgment shall be brought forth unto final Victory; and the Redemption of the Soul shall cease for ever.

The vain Hopes of Sinners shall then be ended in Eternal Desperation: Hell will be full of those, who did once hope they should never come there: And full of those who despair of Deliverance from thence; but shall suffer exquisitive Pains that cannot be numbred, or measured, or endured; but that every Minute of an Hour will seem an whole Year, and yet must eternally be endured by mise­rable Sinners, who will not be wise in time, to prevent such an intollerable Por­tion? Let me therefore, O my Soul, de­scend into Hell by Meditation, whilst I live, that I may not descend thither when I dye; and be shut up for ever in that Prison, the Place of Endless Tor­ment.

Might we but suppose, that one of those Miserable Souls did let fall but one Tear, in an Hundred Thousand Years; and if after he had by this means wept so much, as that his Tears would equal the Drops of Water in the whole Sea; [Page 103]his Misery should have an End; this were Hope, this were Comfort. But alas! after that Period, his Misery will be as far from an End, as when he first began to feel it. It will then be but the Beginning of Sorrows, which will Never, Never, Never End.

Think, O my Soul! that this is the Portion of the Sinners Cup; this is the Wages of Sin, and the certain Doom of final Impenitence and Unbelief. 'Tis no Politick Cheat, or Melancholly Dream, but the express, repeated Word of God, and Christ, the Holy Prophets and Apostles, and the Voice of Reason too. Supposing but the Immortality of the Soul, and the Power of Self-Reflecti­on, the Punishment of Sinners must needs be Everlasting, as carrying con­tinually an Hell within them; unless God work a Miracle to prevent it, which there is no Ground to imagine he will, or Shadow of Reason why he should. God hath pawn'd his Truth and his ^(*) Eternity, to execute this Sentence of his threatned Wrath. He is a God of In­finite Mercy, 'tis true; but he hath told [Page 104]us how far his Merey shall extend. He will not exercise one Attribute to the dis­honour and the disparagement of the rest. That obstinate and impenitent Sinners shall thus perish, is not because the goodness and mercy of God are not infinite, but because his other Perfections are so; viz. His Holiness, Justice, Truth, Soveraignty and Wisdom. Was it Wis­dom and Goodness to annex such a Pe­nalty to the violaion of his Law; and can it be inconsistent with them, to inflict his threatned wrath?

Shall we suppose God, to uphold his Dominion and Government by a Fals­hood? to keep the World in awe, by the menaces of such punishment, as shall no where, never, be executed? Is it unlikely, that God should exercise so much severity? and is it not as improba­ble, that his repeated Word and Oath should prove false? Is it not a righteous thing with God, as the Governour of the World; thus to punish the obstinate Despisers of his Grace? who slighted his Authority, disobeyed his Law, af­fronted his Soveraignty, derided his Power, denied his Truth, contradict­ed his Holiness, and joined Issue with [Page 105]the Devil, to pull him from his Throne; who abused his Patience and Long-suf­fering, and scorned all his threatnings; who thrust away their own happiness, and would not take warning; who burst all his bands asunder, and broke through all obstructions; and would not be stopt in their course of Vanity and Folly, or so much as consider the danger; who rejected his calls to Repentance, and refused his Mercy, when it was offered; and preferred a Lust before his favour, and the Pleasures and Profits of this World, before the Heavenly Glory; and notwithstanding all the methods of his Grace, and the checks of his Provi­dence, and of their own Conscience; they will go on, they will dye?

Let me, O my Soul! adore the So­veraign Justice of God in all his Judg­ments; and tremble at the threatnings of that Eternal Wrath, which so few con­sider or believe, till 'tis too late. Let the foresight, and the fear of such an in­tollerable, endless Punishment, be a means to save me from it! Let me here­in read the evil of Sin, and learn to ab­hor and avoid it. Let me pity, and warn, and counsel, and pray for those [Page 106]of my Relations and Acquaintance, who live in Sin, and run the Hazard of this Eternal Ruin. Let me not envy the foolish Mirth, and momentany Prospe­rity of the Wicked, whose present Joy must e're long expire, and an Everlasting Destruction succeed in its room. ^(*) How short is the Joy of the Hypocrite! and the Triumph of the Wicked is but for a Moment. Let me fear and dread every thing, that leads to this dismal Issue, and improve every thing, that may help me to escape it. And by Consequence, let me less value all the Good and Evil of this present Life; judge of all things by this Light; be patient under Temporal Calamities, and thank God that it is not Hell; and thank him more, that pre­sent Sufferings do help to save me from Eternal Ones.

Whatever I can suffer in this World, let my Condition be never so dark, and sad, and afflicted, it is not, it cannot be such, but that every one of the Damned, would think it an infinite Happiness to exchange with me, and be as I am. Let me think of those Exquisite and Eternal [Page 107]Flames, to cure my Impatience, under the sharpest Tryals and Afflictions I may now suffer.

Did I believingly Consider an Ever­lasting Hell ^*, I should not think much of any thing, that is required to prevent it. The severest Exercises of Religion, the strictest Temperance, the nicest Cha­stity, the largest Charity, the greatest Self-denial, all the Hardships of Repen­tance and Mortification, and Continuance therein to the Death, tho' for many Years more than I am like to live, would be rec­kon'd easie, as well as just, if set in the Bal­lance against the Eternal Mischiefs of the Damned.

What will not Men do and suffer, to prevent a Temporal Death? They will endure a painful Course of Physick; tear out their very Bowels, by Purges and Vomits; and are content to be cut and scarrified, and to suffer any thing al­most to save their Lives: But how little will they do, to be saved from the Wrath to come! One would think, they should [Page 108]have no Rest, or Peace, or be able to live a quiet Hour, 'till they had made some Provision against the Hazard of this Eternal Destruction; and look upon all Men as their Friends, or Enemies, according to the Help or Hindrance, they received from them, in reference to it. But the direct Contrary is every where apparent. Men are careless and secure, jovial and merry, in the Way that leads to Hell; and esteem, and love, and chuse that Company, that will help to bring them to this Place of Torment: Yea, such is their Stupidity, and strange Perverseness, that they will not suffer to be told of their Danger. If you tell them, that by such a Course, or such an Action, they will lose so much Money, or their Lives will be in Dan­ger; they reckon it an Obligation, will take it kindly, and return you Thanks: But when they are told, by such Courses and Actions they will lose their Souls, and the Favour of God, and the Hopes of Heaven, and must perish for Ever; this they will not re­ceive, they despise the Message, and scorn and hate the Messenger; are dis­pleased and angry at such Faithfulness.

O bless the Lord O my Soul! for any good hope through Grace, of escaping this Intolerable and Endless Misery. And let all that is within me, bless his Holy Name. I have deserved the same endless, and un­supportable Wrath, which Thousands are now under, and shall be under to all Eternity; but he did not suffer me to fall into it. To be delivered out of those Torments after many Years Misery, would be thought an admirable, un­speakable Kindness: And is it not a greater Favour, never to be thrown into Hell, which I have so often deserved? How grateful would a damned Person be, to be freed from those Flames, and plac'd in the same Condition, I now am in? What a Life of serious, self-deny­ing Obedience would he lead? And hath not God done more for me? Am I not more indebted to his Goodness? He hath kept me out of Hell, and offers me the Heavenly Glory, upon Reasonable, Honourable, and easie Terms. Blessed be God, I may yet escape the Wrath to come.

Let me heartily compassionate the Delusion, of those Multitudes of deceived, perishing Souls, whose Eyes are blinded [Page 110]by the God of this World; who will not believe it, till they are convinc'd by the Light of that Fire, which shall never be extinguisht. Yea, when I read, or hear of Ten or Twenty Thousand Men slain in a War, (whether of Infidels or Christi­ans) let me think of it, with other Ap­prehensions, than formerly I was wont to do. Considering that many, it may be, the most of these, shall never have any Comfort or Mercy more; fearing lest the same Sword or Bullet, that gave them their Mortal Wound, hath fixt them under God's Everlasting Wrath; and that by dying, they are undone for ever.

In very many other Cases, the Faith of this Article would rectifie my Opini­on, and direct my Actions, if seriously considered and improved. This would make me think of Death under another Notion, than 'tis commonly considered. For without the Consideration of Hell an­nexed to it, it is not so very formidable, but that Heathens have been able to despise it. The most Contrary Sects among them, on different Grounds have been able to do it; but consider Death as a Passage to Eternal Misery, as the [Page 111]Gate of Hell, as the End of all Comfort to a Wicked Man, and the Beginning of an Endless Calamity, and nothing can be imagined more dreadful to a Guilty, Unholy Soul. Some of my Acquaintance, it may be, who died this last Year, are now among those Hopeless, Despairing Wretches, who expect the final Judgment of God, to consummate their insuppor­table Misery. If they were permitted to come, and tell us what they suffer, and what they know; what a Terrible Consuming Fire God is; what Vanity, Lust, and Folly, brought them to this Place of Torment; what Diligence they would advise us to, while in a State of Hope, to prevent the like; if we have any Love and Kindness for our selves, any Bowels of Compassion to our own Souls; What a Change do we think it would work upon us? But if we will not hear Moses; and the Prophets, Christ, and his Apostles; neither should we believe, tho' one came from the Dead.

SECT. XX.

DOth one Year after another, hasten me to the End of Time? And doth the Blessedness of Eternity depend on the Communications I now receive from God? On the Preparations I now make, and the Meetness I can now at­tain for Eternal Felicity, in the Presence of my God and Saviour? O, with what Intenseness of Mind, should I now pro­secute that Glorious Object; with what unwearied Diligence, should I run the Race that is set before me, lest I fall short of the Incorruptible Crown of Life? How should every thing be undervalued and rejected, that would divert, re­tard, or hinder me from pursuing this End? Lord! be not a Stranger to my [Page 113]Soul, in this distant Wilderness state! Let me see more of thy Light! be trans­form'd more into thine Image! expe­rience more of thy Love! feel more of thy vital Presence, and quickning Spi­rit; Let the Divine Life in my Soul be more powerful, and the Characters of thy Likeness be more legibly stampt upon it! by the daily Exercise of Faith, and Hope, and Holy Affections, carry me through this World! 'till my Pilgrim state be over, and thou hast brought me to perfect, Everlasting Holiness! And let the believing Fore-thoughts of it, fill all the Powers of my Soul with Joy, and Wonder, Desire and Love!

Give me, Lord! to think aright of the Heavenly Glory; as a Confirmed State of positive, perfect Holiness; of Hea­venly Light, Love, Liberty and Joy, with the satisfying Vision of God, in the Face of Christ, and his impressed Likeness; dwelling for ever in the direct, and steady View of his Transforming Glory; with compleat Conformity of the Soul to Eternal Goodness, Truth and Love, as its Perfection; esteeming nothing, desiring nothing, but that God and Christ may be glorified, with an en­tire [Page 114]Subjection to his Will, Adherence to him; Rest and Confidence in him, Swal­lowed up in the Love, Admiration, and Praise of God, and our Lord Jesus; living in joyful repeated Acts of Sub­jection, Adoration, and Acknowledg'd Dependance; ravish'd to behold the Glory of God, in the Face of Christ, to see his blessed Image perfect in every one of the Saints, &c. When all the pre­sent Blindness of our Minds, the Errors of our Judgment, the Perverseness of our Will, the Disorder and Rebellion of our Passions, the remaining Aversation from God, and Disaffection to him, which in this World we complain of, shall all be done away: The Flesh shall no more lust against the Spirit; or the Law in our Members against the Law of our Minds; but an Everlasting Tran­quility and Holy Peace take place; a Peace which passeth all Understanding, without any outward Molestation, or inward Cause of Disquiet.

Our corrupted Nature shall no more cast forth Mire and Dirt as now; we shall have no more vain, or wicked Thoughts, no more sinful Fears, or fool­ish Hopes; unbecoming Heats, unruly [Page 115]Desires, Sensual Inclinations, Earthly Affections, Feeble, Sloathful, Spiritless Duties, Dead and Heartless Prayers, Cold Thanksgivings, &c. But as we shall then know God without Errors, and see our Lord Jesus Face to Face; so we shall love him without reserve, more than now we can think; and serve him without Dulness and Distraction, and Praise him without Weariness; the Spiritual Actings of our Souls shall have no Allay of Dross. And thus shall we be with him, and ad­mire, and injoy him, without end.

Thus when Death is swallowed up in Victory; and what was imperfect is done away, and what was Corruptible and Mortal, hath put on Immortality; God in Christ, shall be All in All: And when it is truly and perfectly so, Then it is Heaven. The Blessedness whereof is Unconceivable. A Blessed Person, is not exprest in the Singular Number by the Hebrews, but in the Abstract, and in the Plural. Beatitudes, instead of Blessed, because the Blessings are as ma­ny and great, as they have Powers and Capacities to partake of Blessedness. So will it be in Heaven. A Word, tho' commonly used as little understood, as [Page 116] Holiness; which is one of the greatest Mysteries in the World; but will here­after be fully and delightfully under­stood by the Blessed Saints; as the Ma­lignity and Intrinsick Evil of Sin shall be, by the damned Spirits.

Oh, that I might now feel more of this Heavenly Life, begun and carried on in my Soul, by a farther Participa­tion of his Holy Image, and Conformity to his Will! by more vital Effects of his indwelling Spirit in my Soul, form­ing it to be a Temple to himself, for his own Delightful Residence! that forget­ting that, which I have received, I may still be Coveting, and desirous of more; forgetting what I have attain'd, I may press on, with an Holy Eagerness and Fervency, towards the Mark!

When I seriously examine my own Heart, had I nothing else, to prove the Weakness of my Grace, and the sinful Remainders of Unbelief, but the low De­sires, and few Comfortable Thoughts, the seldom joyful Prospect of this Blessed State; how sad an Evidence were it of my low Attainments, that I breath with no more Impatience, after that Blessed, Holy Rest, in the Injoyment of God and [Page 117]Christ; and labour no more in prepa­ring for it? When we profess to believe, that all the Desires of our Souls shall be fix'd on Him, and filled with Him, as our Infinite and Supreme Good; and all the Expectations of Faith and Hope, swallowed up in Endless Admiration, Gratitude and Joy; being fully satisfied, and at Rest, in the Presence and Vision of God; without the least Inclination, or Desire of Change. And by Consequence,

There will be no need of Novelty, as now, to a give a Relish to our Happiness. All Happiness in this World is, by compa­ring a Man's present Condition, with his past, or with that of some Inferiours. But the Intrinsick Good, Felicity, and Joy of Heaven, will need no such Foil to set it off; no such Comparison to make it prized. The Blessed Spirits will never lose the lively Sense, of that low and miserable Condition, from which they were raised to so great a Glory; and so will ever equally rejoyce in the Happiness of their Translation and Wonderful Change. And what was at first delightful, will for Ever be so; and not disdain'd, or lessen'd by a Continuance; as it happens in this World, from the Emptiness, Shal­lowness, [Page 118]and Vanity of the Creature. An Affectation of Variety, and Desire of Change, proceeding always from a Sense of Want. But Holy Souls shall never be weary of Seeing, Loving, and Enjoying God; his Blessed Presence will afford us Undecaying and Endless Satisfacton; Pleasure, never to be interupted, or a­bated, and never to cease. The Blessed Object is absolutely Infinite, and so will be always new to a Finite Understanding; and Continual Fresh Communications from his Infinite Fulness, must needs make our Subjective Happiness to be al­ways new, and Eternally such.

Let me by such Thoughts, quicken and excite my Diligent Endeavours; after a greater Meetness to injoy so great a Bliss. And to that end, Consider, whether any of those Happy Souls, who have finisht their Course, and obtained the Prize, do now regret their utmost Diligence, Pa­tience, and Perseverance, during their short Abode here, to secure the Blessed­ness of an Endless Life: No, no, they are far from repenting the Time they spent, the Trouble they were at, the Care they used, the Difficulties they met with, the Sufferings they endured; to conflct with [Page 119]the World, and the Flesh, to resist Temptation, to watch over their Hearts, and Words, and Ways, to work out their Salvation, to please God, and be faith­ful to him, &c. They find to their Un­speakable Comfort, and Everlasting Joy, that Heaven makes amends for all; they could do or suffer, in order to their Com­ing thither. Yea, they find that they were not Diligent, and Humble, and Patient, and Circumspect enough. That they did not love God, and seek his Glory, re­deem their Time, and improve all their Talents, and Opportunities of doing and receiving Good, and give up themselves intirely to prepare for Heaven, to that degree they should have done. They find, by the Transcendency of the Blessed Recompence; that it deserved infinitely more than the most Active, Zealous Christian upon Earth did ever do; in order to it.

Lord! Quicken my Resolutions and Endeavours, by such Thoughts as these. Inspire my Sluggish, Carnal Heart, with Holy Light, and Life, and Zeal, and Fervour! that looking to the Things which are not seen, which are Eternal; I may ^(*) lay up a good Foundation against the Time [Page 120]to come, and so lay hold on Eternal Life!

But Alas! How much have I neglected the great Duty of Holy Meditation? How little Skill and Experience have I in it? How tastless and inspid oftentimes are my Thoughts of God! how confu­sed and unsteady! how little Pleasure or Advantage have I, by Contemplating his Highest Excellencies? Yet, methinks, could I but retain the same awakened, lively Thoughts of Heaven, and Eternal Life, which sometimes I have had; might I continually feel the Sweet and Sacred In­fluence, as for a little Season I have some­times felt it; how little, how very a Nothing, would all this World be to me! How comparatively weak, its strongest and most alluring Snares, to draw me off from God! with what an unshaken Mind could I refuse and resist 'em! with what an unconcerned Indifference, could I look upon all its most charming Glory!

Could I maintain such a Frame of Spi­rit, as I have sometimes had for a little while; in the serious Contemplation of Divine Misteries, in Fervent Prayers, and other Solemn Duties of Religion; when the Acts of Faith were strong and lively, my Heart set on fire with Love to God, and Holy Breathings after Him; [Page 121]admiring his matchless Grace to fallen Sinners, (and to my Soul in particular) when he brought me to the very Suburbs of Heaven, (tho' alas! how seldom!) by the delightful Thought of what the Bles­sed Spirits above enjoy, in being where Christ is, and beholding his Glory; when I was ready to say within my self, 'Tis good to be here; this is no other than the Gate of Heaven; Oh! when shall Morta­lity be swallowed up of Life! But when I thought at any time, to fix and settle in such sweet Contemplations; how quickly did my lazy, backward Heart fly off! how soon did the Flame decay and dye away! how soon did I find my self fallen down to Earth again! sunk down from the Bosom of my Lord, presently for­got my self and Heaven, to dwell a­mong the Pots, and embrace a Dung­hill! 'Twas not on my own Wings, O Lord! that I soared so high; but I hope, by the Breathings of that Holy Spirit of Light and Love, who bloweth when, and where, and how long he listeth; who gave me at any time, any such first Fruits of the Spirit; who convinc'd me of the Certainty of the Heavenly Inheri­tance, by a lively believing Foresight of it; who made me earnestly desire the [Page 122]Wings of a Dove to be gone, and appear before God in Sion; made me Pant and Groan to be delivered, and to be with God and Christ, with inexpressible De­sire and Joy, unconceivably mixt with Sighs and Groans. O my God! let not this experience be only such a Taste of the Powers of the World to come, as is con­sistent with final Apostacy! only the seem­ing Zeal of the stony Ground! the rap­turous Joy of an Hypocite! from the Power of Imagination, and a heated Fancy; from the workings of meer Na­tural Self-love; upon Mistaken Appre­hensions of God, and a false Opinion of Heaven; but by the Holy Effects, let me be assured of the Cause and Principle; that was of God.

Teach me, from the Sweetness of all Spiritual Communion with God now, in any of his appointed Ordinances; to ar­gue to my self, what the most ravishing Satisfaction will be; that the Enjoyment of God in Heaven will afford the Soul. Our Holiness is now imperfect, to what it shall be; and therefore our Consola­tion, Peace and Joy, is but in part; and incomparably less than we are assured it will be, when we shall be admitted to behold the Glory of the Lord. 'Tis now [Page 123]at most, but as the Break of Day, to the Lustre of the Meridian Sun. But if in this low imperfect State, we can some­times obtain so near a View of his Glory, and feel such sweet Communications of his Grace; how much more of this Con­solation and Joy, is reserved to Heaven? If in this Pilgrim State, the Gifts and Graces, and Comforts of the Holy Spirit are so refreshing: O! what hath God prepared beyond the Grave, for those who love him? If now he sometimes shed abroad his Love in our Hearts, after such a Manner; how much better shall I love him, and feel the Influence, and Evidence of his Love to me; when I shall be with him, and see him Face to Face? If the Apprehensions of this Future Blessedness, do now encourage, raise, and animate my drooping Soul: O, what shall I know and see? And how shall I rejoyce, when the Vail is removed? If a Sacramental Communion with God and Jesus Christ, be sometimes so sweet, and so affecting; what will the Blessed Communion with God, and all his Saints above, amount to? when I shall sit down with all the Chil­dren of God, in the Presence of the Bridegroom, at the last Great Supper of the Lamb in Glory! If the Earnest of [Page 124]our Inheritance be so reviving, what will be the full Possession of it? If the Hopes of that Glorious Day, by Holy Medita­tion, be so transporting; what will be the End of our Faith and Hope? If a Grape or two in the Wilderness, be such a Cor­dial; what will be the whole Vintage in the Land of Promise?

Shall I after all this, forget my own Experience, and run from God and Hea­ven, to embrace or seek a perishing Toy? Shall I hide my self with Saul, a­mong the Stuff and Lumber of this World; when God is calling me to a Glorious Crown? Art thou, O my Soul! a King's Son, an Heir of Heaven, an Expectant of such great Felicity, and yet stoop so low? Hope for Heaven, and yet grasp this Earth; and hug the vain Appearances of Earthly Good? Hope to be like to God, (and Oh how Glorious an Hope is that!) to partake of his Image, and live Eter­nally with him; and yet be solicitous, anxious, and disquieted about Honour, and Money, and a Temporal Interest? And mightily concerned about the Mo­mentany Gratifications of the Flesh, and the Enjoyments of this World? Art thou a Pilgrim and Stranger here, and tra­velling Home to the Heavenly Country, [Page 125]and yet eager and passionate about Earthly Things? Should an Heart that is set upon Heaven, (or may be so, and ought to be so) should it burn with such Kitchin, such Common-Fire? And neglect the unconceivable Riches and Pleasures, and immortal Honours of the other Life, and the Dawnings of that Glory upon my Soul, by the Foretasts of it in this? How great is the Disproportion between the Heavens and the Earth? How vast the Circumference of the one, and how small a Point the other? How many thousand Miles, doth the Sun travel in the Heavens, while it passeth but one Inch upon a Dial? Oh! that my Affections were carried to Heavenly Things, with a swiftness somewhat answerable to the Glorious Object. And let their Motion to Earthly Things, be rather slow and in­sensible, like that of the Sun on a Dial. Since I profess to believe, and wait for the Heavenly Glory; should I not live, as seeking such Things, as expecting such a Glory? And are careless and indiffe­rent Thoughts, sleepy, heartless Prayers, faint and weak Endeavours, becoming in such a Case? Shall I not mend my Pace, and double my Diligence in my preparatory Work? When I can believ­ingly [Page 126]foresee the Blessed Recompence; waiting for that Everlasting Light of the Sun of Righteousness, which no Eclipse shall ever darken or obscure; for that Eternal Glorious Day, which shall ne­ver be closed with an Evening. When I shall see the Face of God in Christ, and be like him; participate more of his Image, rest in his Love, and dwell for ever in the Light of his Countenance, ac­cording to the Prayer and Promise of my Blessed Saviour.

And ought not such a Prospect, to sweeten the Bitterness of all our inter­mediate Sufferings? We are now, often­times in Heaviness and Sorrow; but Eter­nity will be enough for an uninterrupted Joy. When we shall exchange all our Troubles for Everlasting Rest, our Prisons for Perfect Liberty, our Poverty for the Riches of God; Darkness for Light; Discord for Love; Deformity for Beau­ty; our Weaknesses and present Lan­guishings, for Strength and Vigor; Folly for Wisdom; Disgrace for Glory; Sick­ness and Pain for Eternal Ease and Health; the Animal for the Angelical Life; Im­perfection and Pollution for Consummate Holiness; our Sighs, and Tears, and Sorrows, and Complaints, for Trium­phant [Page 127]Everlasting Praise; our Losses, Af­fronts, Disappointments, Perplexities, Fears, Groans, and Death; for Crowns and Scepters, Hymns and Hallelujahs, Light and Life, and Bliss unutterable; and such great things as are fit for us to hope, but too great to be now particu­larly understood, and talkt of; while we know but in part, and see through a Glass darkly. Yea, it seems as if it were not lawful to utter 'em, 2 Cor. 12.4. and now they cannot be exprest, or fully known; For Eye hath not seen, nor Ear heard, or can it enter into the Heart of man to conceive, that prepared Glory.

SECT. XXI.

WHAT is there in Heaven or Earth, O Lord! but thy Pre­sence [Page 128]to be valued, loved, desired, cho­sen, sought, or delighted in? There is nothing in either World, desirable without Thee, nothing certainly above Thee; no­thing in Comparison with Thee. In Thee alone I trust, on Thee I depend; in Thee I repose my Confidence and Hope; from Thee I expect all my Felicity and Salvation. Whatever I can lose, yet with the Continuance of thy Favour, which is my Life; I have still Enough. With that I am Rieh, without it I am Poor and Miserable. And if I want the Love of God, all that Heaven and Earth can give besides, will not make me hap­py. In Thee, therefore, I would termi­nate all my Affections, all my Devoti­ons! There is nothing of Heaven to be had on Earth, but in thy Favour, Image and Love; and the reviving Sense of it. And all the Heaven I expect hereafter, 'tis in the more full and immediate Com­munications of these, in thy blessed Pre­sence. I can desire nothing upon Earth; I can injoy nothing in Heaven, but Thee! both here and there, thou art, and shalt ever be my All-sufficient, Satisfactory Por­tion, my Everlasting All! None else can be the Portion of my Soul. Nothing else [Page 129]can fill up all its Wants, answer all its Cravings, be suited to all its Capacities, appease and charm all its restless Moti­ons, and give Complacence to all its De­sires, and be the proper Object of all its Affections.

What is there else can justly claim my Love, or pretend to my Supreme Affecti­on in comparison with God? Thou art alone the proper Center of it. Thine Infinite and Incomparable Excellencies, (who art Love it self) deserve my choi­cest Love; and thy numberless Mercies and Benefits, challenge it as a just Debt as a piece of Homage due from all, and of special Gratitude also from me. Oh, that I could love Thee above all things! who alone art worthy of all my Love! O that Divine Love might be the ruling Principle within me! to inspire all my Thoughts, to regulate all my Desires, to set all the Powers of my Soul on Work! O that it might take the full Possession of my Heart, and so animate and order all my Actions to please him, whom my Soul loveth! If as yet I cannot say with thine Apostle? Lord! thou that knowest all things, thou knowest that I love thee. Yet I can say, Lord, thou knowest that I would [Page 130]love thee! Thou hast provided for our Happiness, by that first and great Com­mand of loving thee with all our Hearts, and Souls and Strength. But alas! how backward is my sluggish, carnal Heart, to this Delightful Exercise? Tho' I have so oft been told, that God is Love, and that He that dwelleth in Love, dwelleth in God, and God in him. O shed abroad thy Love into my Soul! that I may feel the Vital Power and Influence of it, and live continually in the Love of God, and that nothing may ever be able to se­parate me from it.

Whom have I in Heaven or Earth, to Hope in, but Thee? I expect more from Creatures, than they can, or will per­form; but God can do for me more abun­dantly than I can ask or think; exceed my largest Thoughts, out strip my highest Expectations. And no Man was ever disappointed, who made Thee his Hope. When I meet with Crosses and Wrongs, Unfaithfulness, Contempt, Hatred and Persecution from Men, I need not won­der; I was never told by God, it would be otherwise here. Did I look for less from Creatures, and expect more from God; Did I reckon this World to be a [Page 131]State of Trial, and not a Place of Rest and Satisfaction; my Faith and my De­sires would be stronger, with respect to God and Heaven; and Temporal Cala­mities and Disappointment less afflictive and Vexatious.

And what is there, O Lord! in Hea­ven, or in Earth, my Soul can desire be­sides Thee? Is there any thing desireable, but as it is thine, of thee, and from thee? And bears some Impression of thine Ex­cellence, or brings some Intimation of thy Love? And what can I reasonably desire; what that is worth desiring, or having, but thou art able to be, and do, and give?

In whom, or what, shall I Rejoyce, but in Thee, O Lord! shall I solace my self in Transitory Goods, that slip between my Fingers, and perish in the Using? or re­lish Carnal Joys, which pollute and de­base the Soul? When I may and ought to Rejoyce in Thee at all Times, as the only Source of Perfect, Everlasting Joy. Let me then stir up my Drooping, Despond­ing, Unbelieving Heart, to rejoyce in God; who takes Pleasure in the chear­ful Service and Obedience of his Chil­dren; who delighteth in those, who de­light [Page 132]in him. Is not ^* Delighting in God a most Essential, Vital Part of Religion? Should it not be my Constant Frame? Hath not God sufficiently provided, that it may be so? Can I say and believe, that God is the Portion of my Soul; that he is my God. and I hope to live with him for ever, and not Rejoyce? Or can I con­sider the Grace of the new Covenant, the matchless Love of Christ, and the precious Promises of the Gospel; and not see reason to Rejoyce? Yea, doth my Soul love God, and endeavour to please him; and is not the very Act and Exer­cise of holy Love, mixt with unspeaka­ble sweetness?

Whom is there in Heaven, or in Earth, or Hell, that I ought to Fear, but Thee? Who hast a Negative Voice in all the De­signs of Men and Devils; an Hook in their Nostrils, a Bridle in their Mouths, to make them fulfil thy Pleasure; and in every thing accomplish thy Sovereign Decree.

Is there any other, in whom I may re­pose my Trust, but in Thee, O Lord! the Rock of Ages? The might of thy Power, [Page 133]the Unsearchabless of thy Wisdom, the Righteousness of thy Nature, the Stability of thy Truth, the Riches of thy Grace, and the Immutability of thy Promises, are a sure Foundation, for my Soul to trust to, and relye upon. Thy word stands firm for ever, and the Truth of thine Ability, and Readiness to help, in every Time of Need, Endures the same throughout all Generations. At all Times, and in all Places, my Soul may trust in Thee, and find Relief. And they who know thy Name will do so; for in the Lord Jehovah, is Everlasting Kindness and Strength. To answer all my Doubts, to sup­ply all my Wants, and fulfil all my Desires. May not God take it unkindly, that I trust him no more? And is it not a criminal Un­kindness, that I give him not the Glory of all these excellent Attributes, which are the grounds of Trust; by a constant, steady, in­tire Dependance on him for all that I need?

I have none in Heaven but Thee, O Lord! as the Object of my Invocation and Worship. Let other Christians have Recourse to New Mediators, and call upon other Gods: I will make mention of thy Name, and of thy Righteousness only. And ask of Thee what­soever I need, for the sake of thy Christ, my only Adorable Mediator. Him thou hearest alway, with him thou art always well plea­sed. [Page 138]I honour the Holy Angels as Glorious Attendants about thy Throne; and bless thee for them, as Ministring Spirits, for the Good of thy Servants; but I dare not in­voke or worship 'em, because they are Fel­low Servants. On the same Account, I ho­nour the Memory of Departed Saints, but neither invoke them, or pay them Religi­ous Worship. That Glory, thou wilt not give unto another. I have no Precept in Holy Scripture to direct, no Promise to en­courage, no Example to authorize, the In­vocation of any other but Thee; In whom I believe and trust, Rom. 10.14.

Having such a God in Heaven, what can I need on Earth? His Eyes behold me, his Wing is over me, his Hand can supply me, his Grace provide for me. I can want no­thing that is Good; unless I should need some­what, which God, the infinitely Blessed and All-sufficient Good, cannot bestow. If thou art the Portion of my Soul, all my Enemies cannot make me miserable; unless they can void Heaven of the Presence of God, hin­der his Care, bind up his Hand, or obstruct his Love. But tho' my Enemies cannot, I fear my Sins may. They alone can separate between God and my Soul. And consider­ing the multitude and aggravations of them, [Page 139]and thine unspotted Holiness and Justice; I should have too much reason to fear and tremble, yea, and utterly despair, If I had none in Heaven but thee. But thy word assures me, that I have a Mediator there; a faithful and a compassionate High-Priest, Jesus Christ the Righteous; whom thou hast exalted to be a Prince, and a Saviour, to give Repentance and Remission of Sins. Who liveth for ever in Hea­ven, to make Intercession, till he hath brought me there, to behold his Glory, and partake of it.

That Glory, O Lord! thou hast reserved for Heaven; in this World we only desire, believe, and hope to enjoy it. Whom have I in Heaven? That is the Place of Frui­tion. What can I desire upon Earth? This World is the Place of Desires, as the other of full Enjoyment. Most of that which Men call Enjoyment in this Life, consists but in Desire. Desire or Lust, is all that is in the wicked World, 1 John 2. c. 13. the Riches of a Covetous Worldling makes him desire more; and the Great Mystery of Intem­perance, is to create and increase Desires; and Desires of another kind, are the Por­tion of Good Men in this World.

Oh! that I could breath after a State of perfect Fruition in Heaven, with more im­portunate Desires! Who will give me, to be in Heaven with thee? On Earth I desire nothing. [Page 138] [...] [Page 139] [...] [Page 136]So one Version. Let me, O my Soul! think of Heaven, as such a Place, or State of Bles­sed Enjoyment! speak of it, seek it, long for it, prepare for it, as such. And let Jesus Christ, who is the Desire of all Nations, (through whom all Divine Communica­tions are made to fallen Sinners) be the Great Object of my present Desires and Love! Let me desire nothing but as in Him, and for Him; that believing his Word, obeying his Law, adoring his Person, imitating his Example, trusting his Promise, constrained by his Love, partaking of his Image, filled with his Grace, and comforted by his Spirit; my Meditations of him may be sweeter, and my Love stronger, and I may have nothing more left to desire for my Self, but that God who hath raised and exalted Him, would keep alive my Faith, and Hope, and Holy Desires, till he hath made me meet to be with Him; and after hav­ing guided me by his Grace, and Spirit, and Counsels, here on Earth, would re­ceive me to his most Blessed and Glorious Presence in Heaven. Amen, Amen.

XXII.

WHen our Blessed Saviour shall ap­pear to judge the World, I read that it shall be, In his own Glory, the Glory of his Father, and of the Holy Angels. If by the Glory of the Father, be meant that of the Divinity, as the Original and Author of all things in Nature; as the Almighty Creator of the World; and by the Glory of his Holy Angels, be understood that of the Legal Administration, the Law being given by the Disposition of Angels; and by his own Glory, that of the Gospel, as he is the Messiah; that in the Glory of all these, he shall come to Judgment: We have a summary Account of the three diffe­rent Revelations, which God hath made of himself to Mankind; by the Light of Na­ture, that of the Law, and the more mani­fest one of the Gospel. According to which [Page 142] every Man is to be judged at the last Day.

Tho' we cannot distinctly tell what, or how great our Lord's Glory will then be; we may be certain, it will be suitable to the Dignity of his Royal Person, suitable to the Grandeur of his Father's Majesty; with the Splendour of a Triumphant Prince, who is Heir of all Things; and hath all Power in Heaven and in Earth committed to him; the Great Lord of both Worlds, Head of Angels and Men; and suitable to his Glorious Office, as Mediator, and the appointed Judge of Quick and Dead.

If at his Tranfiguration his Face shone, and his Raiment was white and glittering; How much more Splendid will his last Ap­pearance be? When the Bodies of his Saints shall be seven times brighter than the lustre of the Sun? And if his Members shall then be so glorious, how transcendently more so will their Head, their Lord appear? If the Delivery and Promulgation of the Law on Mount Sinai, was accompanied with such Circumstances of Terrible Majesty, how much more may we suppose the Great Assize will be attended with; when he comes to judge for the violation of the Law, and the contempt of the Gospel? And if even Moses did then exceedingly quake and fear, what will be the Consternation [Page 143]and trembling of the wicked World at the Coming of Christ? When he shall be revealed from Heaven in flaming Fire, with a glori­ous retinue of his mighty Angels, as so ma­ny bright Stars, about the more glorious Sun of Righteousness. The Lights of Heaven shall be eclips'd; the visible Sun shall vail its blushing head, as infinitely out-shone; the present Glory of the Creation be all benighted, by reason of his transcendent Brightness. Yea, the Heavens shall be wrapt up as a scroll; the Elements melt away with a mighty noise: the Earth and all its works be burnt up; and the whole Universe as one great Bonfire, to adorn the Triumph of our Lord's Appearance. And this usher'd in by the Voice of an Archangel, proclaiming his approach; and the Voice of God, supplying the use of a Trumpet, to raise the Dead, and possess Mankind with an awful Reverence of their Judge.

Thus in Triumph, as a Conqueror, and a Judge, shall he come again, who once appear'd in the form of a Servant, to be Judged and Condemn'd by Man. Then he was called King in scorn: Now he will ap­pear as much above all Earthly and Humane Greatness, as once he stoop'd, for our sakes, beneath it. Then the Contempt of Na­tions, [Page 142] [...] [Page 143] [...] [Page 144]and no way esteem'd Desirable, when he came from the Womb of his Virgin-Mother: Now the Terrour of the World, when he comes again from the Right-hand of his Father. No more to be subject to a state of Meanness, but to render vengeance to all, who know not God, and obey not the Gospel: and to be glorified in his Saints, and admired in, and by, all them that believe ^*.

He was put to shame in the days of his Flesh, made himself of no Reputation, and accounted unworthy to live: But when he comes again, he will put on a Garment of Vengeance, to repay Fury to the Enemies of his Cross, and make his wicked Despisers rise again to shame, and everlasting contempt. They that once bowed the knee to him in mockery, and shaked their heads at him in derision, shall then see every knee how before him, of things in Heaven, things in Earth, and under the Earth: Angels, Men, and Devils, in subjection to him, as Lord and King. Pi­late, who condem'd him as his Prisoner, shall appear before him as his rightful Judge; and know, that he was another­guess King and Monarch, than the Roman Emperor. The false Witnesses, who accused [Page 145]him of Blasphemy, shall be impeach'd by one another, and their own guilty Con­sciences, before his Bar; with the other Jews, who once drag'd him before their Tribunal; and be confounded, to stand before his Judgment-Seat. His Crucifiers shall behold him on a Throne of Glory, whom they Nailed to an infamous Cross. They shall be astonish'd, to behold him sitting at the Right Hand of God, whose Hands they bound, whose Body they scourg'd, whose Side they pierc'd. They who Crown'd him with Thorns, shall (with all the World) behold him with a Crown of Glory. They that spit on him, and smote him on the face, with the fist of wickedness, shall have their own faces covered with Confusion. They that ap­proved his Condemnation to Death, as a Criminal, shall be sentenced from His mouth, as their Judge, to Everlasting De­struction. They that scourged him, as a Malefactor, shall be beaten with many stripes. They that made him stagger un­der the weight of his Cross, shall sink under the guilt and punishment of despising it. They that Nailed him to the accursed Tree, between Thieves and Robbers, shall be sentenc'd to endless Punishment, in much worse Company. They who gave [Page 146]him Gall and Vinegar to drink, shall not be able to get a drop of water to cool their own Tongues. Where then shall the Wicked and Ungodly of the Christian World appear? who Crucifie the Son of God afresh, since he hath declared himself to be so, by his Resurrection, and the Mis­sion of the Holy Ghost, and fulfilling his threatned Vengeance on the Nation of the Jews, &c.

If the Jews shall have a sorer Condem­nation than ignorant Heathens, who never heard of Christ, never saw his Miracles, or were inform'd of his Doctrine; How shall we escape? For he will come again as a Conqueror, and Judge, and not as a Suf­ferer and a Surety, as he came at first; and tho' he was numbred with Transgres­sors, and made his Grave with the Wicked, at his first Appearance; he shall hereafter be attended with the shouts of Angels, who excell in strength, and the joyful Acclama­tions of his Saints, glittering as the Light, and paying Homage to Him as the Judge of Quick and Dead. He, whom we have despised, shall then be encompass'd with a dezling Glory, that will confound us. He, whom we have affronted, will be cloathed with a Majesty that shall astonish us. He, whom we have offended, shall be armed [Page 147]with Power, and with Wrath to punish us; and all that continue to lift up the Heel against him, shall then be made his Foot­stool: all that refuse to kiss the Sceptre of his Grace, shall be broken in pieces by his Iron Rod.

The Holy Scripture doth frequently, and expresly assure us, that he will thus come again, and for these ends. He is exalted, and gone to Heaven, as the Head of his Church, and the King of Glory; and when he foretold his Ascension, he gave a pro­mise of his Return. The Heavens are to contain him, till the Restitution of all things. By his Providence, and by his holy Spirit, he now carries on the Designs of his Death: and when these are accomplish'd, he will appear, to the Joy of Believers, and the Confusion of the Wicked. He is entred as our ^* Foerunner, within the Veil, to prepare Mansions, and to take possession for us, and will not always leave us in this dark and de­filing World. He knoweth our Sorrows, and heareth our Prayers, and bottles our Tears, takes notice of our Groans, and in all our Afflictions he is afflicted. Being re­conciled by his Death, at his first coming, we shall be saved by his Life, since he lives to make good his word of coming again.

How comfortable is the News of it? how joyful will be the Meeting, to such as expect and prepare to see him? when the Sea and the Graves shall yield up their Dead, and all the Prisoners of Hope lift up their heads, arise, go up, and meet the Lord in the Air, and ascend with him to the Hea­venly Glory. But who can express how dismal a Sight this will be to the Secure, and the Impenitent, to all who die in their sins? to behold their Judge (who formerly of­fered to be their Saviour) upon a glorious Throne, and all the Children of Adam sum­mon'd before his Tribunal! to have nothing to answer against his Charge, and no way to escape his condemning Sentence! They despised him as a Lamb, offer'd his Sacrifice to take away the Sins of the World; but shall no longer do so, when he comes as the Lion of the Tribe of Judah, to devour and destroy the Enemies of his Cross. Now they will not own him for their Lord, but shall then find he is so, by the Vengeance he will execute.

As a Jesus, as a Saviour they rejected him, making light of his Salvation, despising his Mercy, refusing his Grace: but the neglected Gospel, will then be a more killing Letter than the Law. He who by his Embassadors doth now intreat Sinners to be reconciled, will [Page 149]then be as deaf to their Intreaties, as they have been to His. Because they would not turn at his Reproof, hearken to the Call of his Word, and obey its Voice, they must hear the Sentence of Condemnation, and feel the Execution of it, whether they will or no; yea, the Blood of his Cross will up­braid, accuse, and plead against them. And whatsoever foolish Evasions they now make, to continue in security, they shall then be Speechless, and Self-condemned. Nothing will be able to hide them, from the amazing Pre­sence of their Judge, or from the Wrath of the Lamb. He then will inflict an intolerable and righteous Vengeance, an Everlasting De­struction, upon all the ignorant and ungodly World: The Greatest, the Stoutest, the Boldest of them, shall then be humbled, and stand before Christ's Tribunal, upon an equal Level with the Meanest; seized with hor­ror, filled with guilt, anguish, and despair; and find to their eternal Confusion, that the Judge is no respecter of Persons, but every man shall receive according to his works. The Mighty shall not be spared for his Great­ness, nor the Mean man for his Poverty.

O Fool! O Wretch that I am! shall many then say, who now brave it out in Pride and Vanity, unconcern'd about a future Judg­ment! not to be persuaded by the Terrors [Page 150]of the Lord, which I was so often warn'd and foretold of! What Refuge of Hope can I now flie to? What can I say for my self? What can I do to escape, to die, to exist no longer? I would have no compassion on my own Soul; I would not so much as consider its danger; I shall now find none from Christ, I can expect none: His Mer­cy is gone, and gone for ever! I am lost, undone, tormented, and must eternally be so. O the Amazement, Horror, and Despair of self-condemned Sinners in that day of Vengeance!

O my Soul! what is there of greater Con­sequence, or of greater Certainty from the Word of God, than that I must appear to Judgment, when Christ shall come again? Lord, teach me to believe it firmly, to con­sider it often, to lay it seriously to heart, to act under the Influence and Power of it, as long as I live; that at the Great Resur­rection from the Dead, I may lift up my head with a joyful Hope, and find the Judge to be my Friend, my Advocate, my Jesus, and not my Enemy, and Destroyer.

XXIII.

THE Terror of our Lord's Appearance to Judgment, cannot be greater to the Wicked, than the Comfort and Joy of it will be to the Saints. When they shall see Him whom their Souls love, ascend with him to Heaven, and be welcom'd, accord­ing to his Promise, with those endearing words, ^* Come, ye blessed Children of my Fa­ther, inherit the Kingdom prepared for you, from before the foundation of the World. ‘'Twas for your sakes I assumed Flesh, lived on Earth, and died on the Cross, to purchase this Glorious Kingdom for you, which I now come to give you the Possession of: 'Twas for this I prayed and suffered on Earth, for this I interceded ever since in Heaven: I was heard in that Prayer, accep­ted in those Sufferings, and my Intercession granted, that where I am, you may be also, to [Page 152]behold my Glory. Come therefore, good and faithful Servants, enter into your Lord's joy.’ O what ravishing words will these be! What an Ecstasie of Love and Kindness is implied in them! What matter of rejoycing may it now give me, to admit the Hope, that my Blessed Savior will say such words as these to me, and bid me stand upon his Right Hand, among his Sheep. O what an exulting frame of Soul will such Expres­sions raise! How shall all my Doubts and Fears and Sorrows be scattered in a mo­ment, and cease for ever! O Glorious Day! when my blessed Lord shall thus publickly acknowledge me for his own, and plead my Cause against all the Accusations of Sa­tan, and the malicious Calumnies of all his Instruments! when I shall be able to say of all my sins and sufferings, as my Lord upon the Cross, It is finished, it is finished! My warfare being accomplish'd, being more than Conqueror over all, through him who loved me, and died for me, and now is come to wipe away all tears from mine eyes, as it were with the Napkin that was bound about his Head, when laid in the Grave; all being the fruit of his merito­rious Death. Then shall I have nothing more to fear, or wish, or beg. I shall of­fend, provoke, and dishonour him no more; [Page 153]or by my folly, and scandal, discredit his ho­ly Name and Gospel: but by consummate Holiness be fitted, to rejoyce in his Presence and Love, and celebrate his Praise for ever. I shall never more lament his Absence, or complain of his Anger; never see a cloud on his Face, or a frown in his Look any more. Now I must wait and pray, struggle and strive, labour and suffer, desire and ex­pect, believe and hope, &c. but then perfect Rest and Holiness, Love and Joy, Vision and Fruition, Bliss and Glory, unutterable and everlasting, shall take place.

All the Attributes of God, all the won­derful Perfections of Christ, will then be glorified in Believers, and admired by them. His invariable Truth will then be honoured, which they trusted to, and waited for; for now they shall know, and find they did not wait in vain: They hop'd in his Word, and ventur'd their Salvation upon it; and now they shall receive the end of their Faith and Hope, infinitely beyond what they ever expected, or believed.

The Glory of Divine Wisdom will then appear, when the Constitution, Admini­stration, and Design of the Mediator's King­dom shall be fully known, in the admirable Order and Beauty of every part of it, with the exact Tendency of all the particu­lars [Page 154]to one Glorious End, and the whole Undertaking crown'd with so blessed an Issue. What is now a Mystery even to Be­lievers themselves, and hath a Veil upon it, shall then no longer be so; all the Riddles of God's Grace and Providence shall be plainly understood. O how transporting a View must it needs be, when the Glory of all the Divine Attributes which God in­tended to accomplish, in and by Christ, shall be manifest to his Redeemed Saints! The whole method of our Salvation, will then appear to be the fruit of unserchable Wis­dom, when we shall all see the Reality and Substance, and entire Scheme, of all that God designed, in and by him; all that was typified of him, and foretold concerning him, in the Old Testament. How will it all appear to be the manifold Wisdom of God! Ephes. 3.10.

As in uniting Heaven and Earth together in the Person of our Moderator; fulfilling the truth of a terrible Threatning in his Death, and by the same way accomplishing ^* many gracious Promises; satisfying Ju­stice, and at the same time shewing Mercy; manifesting infinite Grace and Kindness by [Page 155]shedding of Blood; conquering Death by dying, and disarming the Law by Obedi­ence to it, &c. afterwards subduing the World to the Faith of the Gospel, by the foolishness of Preaching; making men wise to Salvation, by the Knowledge of the Cross; and spreading that Faith the more, by all the opposition made against it, &c. How wonderfully will a clear View of these things discover, and glorifie the Wisdom of God!

But the Love and Grace of Christ; the infinite Goodness and Compassion of God, will then be magnified in an especial man­ner. What but Sovereign Love in the whole Contrivance and Council of God about our Redemption? What admirable Love and Grace in the whole Management of that design? What unparallel'd kindness in the Accomplishment of it, by the Sacrifice of the Son of God? And how Glorious will this Love appear, when he shall come again to give us the full Harvest of all his Purchase? With what admiring Thankful­ness shall Believers then contemplate the unsearchable Riches of his Grace? In all the Parts and Instances of his Humiliation, from his Conception to his Crucifixion and Burial; in all the Evidences and Dis­coveries made of it, from the first Promise [Page 156]to its Completion; yea, from before the Foundation of the World, in the Covenant of Peace between the Father and the Son, until his second Coming, to Judge the World, and deliver up the Kingdom to his Father.

How shall we then admire, and adore his Powerful Grace, which snatcht us as Fire­brands out of everlasting Burnings; that effectually shin'd into our minds by hea­venly Light; conquer'd the Opposition of our stubborn Wills; Sanctified our carnal Hearts, rescued us from the Tyranny of Satan, and the Dominion of Lust; giving, cherishing, and preserving the holy Seed of Grace, and making it Spring up to Eter­nal Life; defeating the malicious and sub­til Endeavours of the Devil to destroy it; inabling us to indure Tribulation, and persevere to the end; giving us Victory over Death; conducting us through the dark Valley; raising our Bodies, reviving ard reuniting them to our Souls, and ren­dring them glorious like his own Body; and at length rewarding our imperfect Services with Eternal Life. Yea, tho' our best Services were mixt with Sin, our ho­liest Duties spotted, our most couragious Sufferings mixt with Unbelief, yet reward­ed with a Blessedness, that hath no Alloy [Page 157]of Evil, but all the Ingredients of a Perfect Felicity, and nothing to lessen and inter­rupt it. How shall we then admire the Bounty of our Gracious Lord, the Freeness, Tenderness, Riches, and the exceeding Greatness, and Glory of his Infinite Good­ness and Grace to poor Believers.

With what Ecstasies of Joy and Gra­titude, may we imagine, that our Lord will be then admired by all his Redeemed ones?

Saying, This is He, who made our Peace with God, and reverst the Sentence of Damnation, which we were under; who bought us with the price of his most preci­ous Blood, bore the Wrath of his Father, and submitted to an infamous and cursed Death for us. He assumed our Nature, that we might partake of his; became the Son of Man, that we might be made the Children of God; for our sakes he became poor, that we through his Poverty might become Rich: He stoopt to bear the greatest Ignominy and Reproach, to confer Honour on us: He was for a time forsaken of his Father, that we might not be so Eternally: He felt the stroke of his Anger against Sin, that we might not perish under it. He was a Man of Sorrows, and acquainted with Griefs, that we might Rejoyce: His Ago­nies [Page 158]and bloody Sweat were for our Re­freshment, and by his Stripes we are Heal­ed: He bowed his Head on the Cross, that we might lift up ours in Triumph; and because we had eaten of the forbidden Fruit, he hung on the Accursed Tree. 'Twas for us that he suffered the Frowns of Heaven, the Enimity of Hell, the Rage of Devils, the Hatred and Persecution of the World: He was judged, that we might not come into Condemnation: He was Crucified, that we might be Glorified; and he is now Come again, finally and fully to effect it.

O the Height, and Depth, and Length, and Breadth of the Love of Christ, which passeth Knowledge, but calls for Admi­ration, and everlasting Gratitude! This is the Blessed Day we long'd and waited, and prayed for! This is our Gracious, our Glorious Lord, whose Love melted our Heart, whose Promise was our Support, whose Word was our Rule, whose Spirit was our Comforter, whose Cross was our Crown, and the Hope of his Appearance our chief Consolation!

Lord! What am I, what was I, that the ever Blessed Son of God should do and suffer and purchase all this for me? I can remember when I was ignorant of God, a [Page 159]Stranger to him, at Enmity with him, under the Power of Darkness, and the Devil, serving divers Lusts and Pleasures, hastening to Hell, and liable to his Wrath. But he chose me out of the World, stampt his Image upon me, pardoned my Sins, and imbrac'd me in the Arms of his unchange­able Love. O happy Change! and yet how little did I prize his Grace, admire his Love, and express my own, or promote his Glory, and honour him in the Eyes of others? How did I dishonour my Profes­sion and holy Calling, as his Disciple, by aggravated Apostacy? But he recovered me by Repentance, and healed my Back-sli­dings, and received me graciously, because he loved me freely. O admirable Grace! to pardon, and save, and bring to Glory such an unthankful Wretch, as I have been! to make such a Difference between Me and Others, whom I knew on Earth! That the same Power, which makes them Miserable, now makes me Blessed! That when they are banisht from his Presence into Everlasting Destruction, I am admitted to behold his Glory, and shall dwell with him for ever!

O, how much more do I now see and find, than ever I believed, of the Love of Christ, and his promised Salvation! How [Page 160]much more glorious is the Person of my Redeemer! How much more Excellent is the Heavenly State, than ever I thought or expected! I could not have imagined the thousandth, thousandth Part of that which I now see and feel. I cannot but admire, and spend an Eternity in admiring, and praising the incomparable Grace and Glory of my blessed Redeemer.

Such Holy Admiration will certainly produce the most thankful Adoration of our Lord Jesus. Saying one to another, O Bless the Lord of Love and Glory! Who humbled himself so low, as our Mediator, and hath exalted us so high, as the blessed Fruit of it! How can we ever enough adore and praise him, who condescended so far, and hath done and suffer'd so much for us? See how the Holy Angels worship this King of Glory! And have not every one of us more reason to do so? O let all the Quire of Heaven celebrate his glorious Love! And let us his Redeemed, his Glo­rified ones say continually, Let the Lord be magnified; who hath loved us, and washed us from our Sins in his own Blood, and made us Kings and Priests unto God his Father, and through him ours.

O merciful Saviour! O glorious Change! O happy Society! With whom we shall Eter­nally [Page 161]adore our Common Lord. We can some of us remember, when we lived toge­ther on Earth, how we wept and prayed, and fasted and mourned together, how we suffered, and complain'd, and sinn'd together. O the marvellous Change our Redeemer hath now wrought for us, and in us! These Bodies, these Souls, this Life, this Place, this Company, these In­joyments, are not like those in yonder World. But alas, who can describe what Believers shall then think, and say to extol their Saviour! How small a Portion is it we understand of that World? How lit­tle can I conceive, and how much less ex­press? Blessed be God we know so much, as the matter of our joyful Hopes; and for ever Blessed be God, who hath promi­sed and provided such a Glory for us, as cannot now be fully known.

What inexpressible Sweetness might Believers tast, by rejoycing in Hope, did a more lively Faith realize all this to their Souls? We might listen as it were to the Shouts and Acclamations of the Saints a­bove, and say Amen to their Thanksgi­vings. We might behold them about the Throne of God, and of the Lamb, with Psalms of Victory in their Hands, a Crown of Glory on their Heads, and Songs of Triumph in their Mouths, saying, Allelu­jah; [Page 162]^*Worthy art thou, O Lord, to receive Glory, and Honour, and Power; for thou hast created all things, and for thy Pleasure they are, and were created. And worthy is the Lamb that was slain, to receive Power, and Riches, and Wisdom, and Strength, and Ho­nour, and Glory, and Blessing. And again, Blessing, Honour, Glory and Power be unto him who sits upon the Throne, and to the Lamb, for ever and ever.

Whence is it, O my Soul! if indeed I believe and expect all this; that I can Hear, and Read, and Think, and Speak of these great Things, with no more ardent Affections, suitable Preparations, importu­nate Prayers, and vigorous Desires? How should the believing Thoughts of that Day promote my Heavenly-mindedness, Self-denial, Contempt of the World, Patience and Perseverance? Quicken my Zeal, se­cure my Stedfastness, and give Life and Spirit to my Prayers for the hastening of it? How should my Soul rise towards Heaven, by holy Love and Desire? Ascend and meet him, get as near him as I can, breathe after more of his Presence, and beg him to prepossess my Heart, to anticipate his second Coming by clearer Discoveries of his Love, and fuller Communications [Page 163]of his Grace? Even so, Come Lord Jesus.

XXIV.

I Am hastening every Year, every Day, to the period of this Life: I must short­ly appear before my Glorious Judge; and experience these Terrors or Comforts, this Blessedness or Misery, which I have now read of. Shall I not therefore inquire, which of the two belongs to me? Is it not worth considering, whither I must go, and how I shall fare, when I quit this Bo­dy? What is like to be my next Habita­tion? To which of the two unchangeable States I shall be adjudg'd? Shall an Inquiry of so much consequence be put off, to an indefinite hereafter? Do I not desire to know the worst, while a remedy may be found? Or am I content to dye, through an unwillingness to discover that I am Sick? The Question to be resolved, is of infinite weight. Shall I not spend a few [Page 164]hours to know what will become of me for ever? An error is more than possible, 'tis easie to mistake; and the hazard of do­ing so is unspeakeably great. How many thousands perish eternally, even under the Light of the Gospel, who never suspected their Danger? How ordinary, how com­mon a thing is it, for Men to be thus de­ceived! How successful is the Devil in this Stratagem against the Souls of Men!

Is it not then a most criminal Stupidity, to be contentedly ignorant, and unresolved, whether I am reconciled to God or no; whe­ther I am led by the Flesh or by the Spirit; whether I am in the broad or narrow way, which lead to such contrary ends; that is, whether, if I die in this condition, I shall be saved or perish? Can such an enquiry be frivolous or indifferent? Is the subject of it so contemptible, or my concern in it so small, that it merits not to be attentively considered? Shall I never ask my Soul, till I am leaving this World, (the unfittest time of all to be­gin so important an Affair) what am I? To whom do I belong? Whose Image do I bear? How have I lived, and what do I do? What do I love most? What do I most constantly desire, and chuse, and seek? How doth the Pulse of my Soul beat? Is it quickest towards God, or to­wards the World? Whither am I going? What will be the final upshot and issue of my present [Page 165]course? Is it Heaven or Hell I must be tran­slated to by dying? What security have I got for Eternal Life? What provisions have I made? What Foundation have I laid?

How strangely infatuated are most Men, who talk of an Everlasting Life, as an Article of their Creed, and say they count upon it, that they must dwell in Happiness or Mi­sery for ever; and seldom or never be­think themselves in good earnest, and for any time, with a setled composed exercise of thoughts, which of these Two is like to be their Lot. Or if they begin to search and try themselves, they come to no Conclusion, or conclude too hastily; they pluck off the Plaister, as soon as it begins to smart; they are either frighted with the horrid prospect of past Crimes, or having escap'd the grosser Pollutions of the World, judge too favourably of their own case. They commonly do the Work but by halves, and so go from the Glass, and forget what manner of Persons they were.

Let me therefore, O my Soul! Sequester my self from the World, to commune with my own Heart, to reflect upon my past Life, and look into my present State, to recollect and review the most considerable Passages of my course, and time hitherto. O how neglected and disused a Practice is this, which doth challenge and require our prin­cipal [Page 166]and most serious Concerns about it! And how many begin it, and are discoura­ged, and leave off without reaching the end of such an Enquiry?

How much wiser in this respect are the Children of this World, in their Generation, than the Children of Light? Who is so exact in his Accompts between God and his own Soul, as Tradesmen in their Dealings with one a­nother? Who is at the pains to write down his Sins and his Mercies? the grounds of his Fear, and the Encouragements of his Hope; or keeps a Journal and Diary of his Spiritual State? Who doth at set times, once a Month, or once a Quarter, or even once a Year, take a just view of himself, his Heart, and Life, and State, as a Christian; that he may see what he hath received and done, what he owes, and what he may expect; that he may know whether he thrive or decay; whether he increase or decrease; whether he go backward or forward; whether he be Richer or Poorer this Year than the last? And is it not a Symptom that you are declining, when you love not to examine your Ac­counts? Is there not ground of jealousie and suspicion, that you are behind-hand, because you are loth to inquire, whether you are or no? And unwilling to know the worst of your Condition? Nevertheless, with­out such Enquiries, and bringing the matter [Page 167]to a Determination, at what uncertainties must we live? And how unconceivable an hazard do all Hypocrites and unrenewed Sinners run? And how reasonable, how necessary is it that we should know, and in order to it, prove our selves? We must therefore bestow Time, and serious Dili­gence about it, that we may examine mat­ters to the bottom, and come to some Re­sult; so that we may form a right Judg­ment concerning our own Case.

He that would do it to good purpose, must endeavour to understand clearly the terms of the Covenant, on God's part, and on ours: And take care not to Judge of himself by mistaken Rules; by a false Stan­dard that God will not justifie; or by any such Characters as will not conclude. But most Men are unwilling to bring themselves to a Trial, or to let Conscience deal plainly and faithfully with them. They are stu­pidly secure, and see not the necessity of this duty: Or do not suspect themselves. They presume they need not be at that Trouble: Or are so taken up with the World, that they cannot find time and lea­sure for it. And many Men dare not bring their Hearts and Ways to a Trial. There is commonly some secret Lust indulg'd, which they are loth to let go. But most go on in sin, and perish Eternally, because [Page 168]they think there is no danger of perishing: and never Repent, and make their Peace with God, because they fancy, and presume 'tis done already.

Therefore let me beg of thee, whoever thou art, who readest this, to put the Case to thy self, seriously to admit the doubt, whether you are not mistaken; make the supposition, that you have not hitherto suffi­ciently considered the State of your Soul. You are confident that all is well; and there­upon are unwilling to Examine farther: But for that very reason you ought to que­stion, whether it be so or not? Do but ask your selves seriously, what is the ground of your good Opinion concerning your self? For what reason can you thus conclude?

Did you ever seriously lay to heart the Characters, and Description, which the Scriptures give, of those whom Christ will own at the last day; and of such whom he will reject and reprobate? With un­feigned Application to your own case, have you therewith prov'd your selves? and come to a setled Judgment, after a delibe­rate Enquiry? and was the Conclusion to your Comfort and Joy? If so, what in­fluence hath it since had upon your Heart and Life? Hath it promoted Purity, Thank­fulness, Heavenly-mindedness, Contempt [Page 169]of this World, and stronger Desires after the Image, Love, and Presence of God, and the Glory of Christ? Moreover, con­sider,

Is not this a good while a-go? How have you behav'd your self ever since? Have you not reason to look back with shame? If you but slightly examin'd your self formerly, resolve to do it more effectually now: Review the sins you have been since guilty of. And if you have not done any thing considerable of this kind, you ought now to begin. It is seasonable to begin the year by such an Exercise, and it will be found of great use, in all the following parts of it: Especially when you come to examine your self afresh, in order to the Lord's Supper. For we ought fre­quently to renew the sad Remembrance of our former Sins; that from time to time we may renew our Repentance, which is the Work of our Life, and not of one day. And he that comes to the Sacrament, and will look no farther back, than to the last Communion, may possibly presume too much, that all was then, as it should be, and not be humble enough.

If any one therefore resolve in good earnest upon an holy Life, and seriously de­sign to prepare for Eternity, as it is necessa­ry to make a general Review of his Life, [Page 170]so I desire to afford him the best Counsel I can, in order to it.

It may be advisable, ^(a) if you have not formerly begun this Work, to imploy one hour at least in a Day, for several Days fol­lowing, in writing down the most considera­ble Passages of your Life you can remem­ber, desiring God's Assistance therein; and keeping your Eye upon your End, in the whole; that is, thinking serioussy that 'tis in order to Eternity, that you now ex­amine your self. Chuse a place of Retire­ment, and the most convenient Time, that you may not be interrupted, and when your Heart is most serious. Every man may divide his Life into several parts, as from Infancy till he left off going to School, or was bound Apprentice, or setled in any way of Education. From thence, till fixt in some Imployment: If a Married Person, till entred into that Condition. And from thence to another remarkable Period, or to the present Time. It may better assist some Persons memory, to consider the se­veral Places of their abode, and compute according to them. In each portion of time, recollect what sins you were most addicted to: in what Instances, with what [Page 171]Frequency, and with what other various Aggravations, you committed 'em: And what have been the effects and consequences of those sins, to your selves, and others, in order to Repentance, and Godly Sorrow. Which must not be judged of by Tears, but Grief, and inward hatred of Sin. Re­membring that no man is the better, meerly for being examin'd, if there follows no­thing after it. 'Tis in order to a Judgment to be pass'd upon our selves. 'Tis to search out our own Iniquity, our Beloved sin, in order to the Mortification of it. That Go­liah must first be slain, if ever the other Philistins are conquered. In some it is Pride, in others Worldliness, in some Un­cleanness, in others Drunkenness, Gluttony, &c. That you may discover it, observe, What sin 'tis you are most unwilling to part with: Which you could even wish were not forbidden.

Which you have formerly been most apt to plead for, to extenuate, or excuse, & hide.

The thoughts whereof do most frequent­ly occur; especially when alone: first in the morning, and last at night: And are most distracting in Prayer and Worship.

Which an awaken'd Conscience hath most plainly told you of; under a Sermon, or at a Sacrament, or under some heavy Afflicti­on, or on a sick-bed, &c.

Which you can least bear to be reprov'd for.

Which the Temperament of your body doth most incline to.

Which your Calling, Imployment, Com­pany, and Converse, administer the great­est Temptations for.

That especially which hath the Throne of the Heart, and sets all the faculties a­work, to contrive fuel and opportunities for its Gratification.

Observe likewise what Passion was most Predominant in each Period of Time, or is yet so; and what ill effects it hath produ­ced. Consider farther what dangerous Temptations you have met with; how you have fallen by 'em, or been inabled to re­sist. Consider withal the Time, and the Means, whereby God hath at any time for­merly awaken'd, convinc'd, and humbled you; what Purposes of Amendment, and Promises of Reformation you have ever made; and how far you have, or have not perform'd 'em. Recollect likewise all the special Mercies you have receiv'd from God in every State and Period of your Life, in order to thankfulness. The last Section of these Papers may give you some Assistance therein, and consider what Returns you have made to God, for all his Kindness.

You may do well to consider your self also, in the Relations you have stood to o­thers; [Page 173]as Inferiour, Equal, or Superior; in Family, Church or State; in your Cal­ling, Profession, Imployment, &c. And examine in what more notorious Instances, you have been faulty in your Relative Du­ties. How you did ordinarily carry it in your Place and Station; for that is the best, the truest Picture of a Man, which is like him in his ordinary, every days Habit. Particularly reflect upon the Sins you have committed in Company with others. By whose Example you have been drawn to Sin; who may probably have been temp­ted by yours, and bewail it; and if the Persons are living, admonish them to Re­pent; and if you have injur'd and wrong'd any, acknowledge your Fault, and to the utmost of your Power, make speedy Resti­tution. If any of your Companions in Sin, are Dead, and you fear died without Re­pentance; humble your self particularly before God, for having contributed to their Damnation. I know of some who have made such a Catalogue of their Sins, with the most observable Aggravations of them; which they constantly preserv'd, and fre­quently review'd, to keep them Humble, Penitent, Watchful, and Thankful; and on some occasions of secret Humiliation, have spread them before the Lord (as Hezekiah did the Writing of his Enemy) [Page 174]covering themselves with Shame and Con­fusion of Face, by considering what they have been, and thence admiring the Riches of free Grace, in the forgiveness of such Crimes, through the Blood of Christ.

Examine me, O Lord, and prove me; try my Reins, and my Heart for thy Loving kind­ness is before mine Eyes, and I will walk in thy Truth. Thou hast searched me, O Lord, and known me; Thou knowest my Thoughts a far off; all my secret Sins are in the Light of thy Countenance; and thou art acquainted with all my ways; set my Sins in order before me, that I may Repent and forsake them. Shew me mine Infirmities and Wickedness, that I may watch against them. And teach me to Judge and condemn my self, that I may not be judged of the Lord, or condemned with the World.

XXV.

IT cannot but be of use to Believers also, at stated Times to examine themselves, [Page 175]concerning their Languishings and Decays in Grace, falling from their first Love, to a Spirit of Indifferency and Lukewarm­ness, disorderly walking or unfruitfulness; whether gray Hairs are not here and there up­on them, and they know it not. For God may withdraw by degrees, so that his Depar­ture may not presently be perceiv'd. And some kind of Activity in Duty, may be continued upon false Principles, and from Common Assistance, while a Christian, as to his spiritual State, may be under a dan­gerous Consumption. 'Tis not difficult for others to observe it some times, and would be visible enough to themselves, would they spare a few hours to examine the matter. The Punishment of such Back­slidings, the loss of the quickning, and comforting Presence of the Holy Spirit, deserves likewise to be inquir'd into, in or­der to a speedy Remedy, and should en­force the Counsel.

I mean not barely the Ebbing of Affe­ctions in the Duties of Religion, or the want of Life, and quickning from sensible Consolations, which new Converts, (especi­ally such as have been reclaim'd from a course of notorious Impiety) have more of at first, than afterwards. This doubting Christians should particularly take notice of, by the Instance of the Prodigal, who was [Page 176]extraordinarily feasted at his first Return, but was doubtless contented afterwards with the ordinary Provisions of his Fathers house. Neither doth God dispence the same measure to all alike, nor to any alike at all Times: Some, who are called to great­er Services and Sufferings, than others, or had greater Conflicts before Conversion, may have a greater share than the rest of their Brethren. Neither will the same de­gree of Grace imparted to some Persons, so discernably move and comfort, as it will do some others of a different Temper. 'Tis not therefore so much to be the mat­ter of our Enquiry, (if at all it need to be so) whether we have more or less of sensible Joy, in the performance of Duty. But

Whether we are not fallen and declin'd, as to the inward vital Acts of Grace, and in the outward Fruits of Holiness. Whether we have such clear convincing Apprehen­sions of Divine and Spiritual Truths, and the Mysteries of the Gospel, as formerly; whether our minds are not become more vain and heedless; whether our Knowledge of God, and of the Revelations of his Will, be as powerful and efficacious upon our Hearts and Lives, as heretofore; whether there be not less Frequency, less Consistency, less inward Satisfaction in holy serious [Page 177]Thoughts, than formerly. You were wont to pray and endeavour, that God might be first and last in your Thoughts every day, and by frequent Ejaculations in civil affairs, to maintain a daily converse with God; but now you mind not whe­ther it be so or not; yea, you cannot but know, that it is not thus with you still. It was once your Burden to be pester'd with foolish, filthy, worldly, vain Thoughts, especially on the Lord's Day, or in the Worship of God; you rejected and dis­own'd them, you lamented and pray'd a­gainst them; do so much as examine, whe­ther it be thus still.

Consider all your Affections, and their several Objects; and see whether a Cri­minal Lukewarmness hath not diffus'd it self into every of them. Examine eve­ry Grace; and see whether your Faith, Hope, Love, holy Desires, and Delight in God be not miserably abated; as to the strength and vigor, the efficacy, and fre­quent exercise of every of them; so that your Thoughts of God are few, cold, and lifeless, without Desire, Delight and Love.

Consider the Opportunities of Publick Wor­ship, and solemn Occasions of approaching the Divine Presence: Are they as much the desire of your Souls, and the rejoycing of [Page 178]your Hearts, as once they were? Are you not more easily diverted from them, less satisfy'd and refresh'd by them? Are not all Gospel-Ordinances less powerful and quick­ning, and your profit and advantage thereby unspeakably less than formerly? Do you hunger and thirst, and pant as the Hart after the Water-brooks, to draw nigh to God, and come into his Courts? Do you make conscience of preparing before­hand? Do you come with a real desire, and design, and expectation of profiting, and bettering your Spirits? Do you join in every part of Divine Worship with that attention, seriousness, and composure of mind, and taste the sweetness and benefit of such Solemnities, as formerly? Are such services perform'd with that Awe of God, with that Humility, Fervency, and Intens­ness of Spirit, as sometimes they were? Are you not more negligent and uncon­cern'd before and after, whether you find any thing of this, or no? Tho' your Desires are weak, your Hearts flat, your Thoughts wandring, your Spirits trifling, so the work be done, and the duty be over, (in how formal, customary, and careless a manner, soever it be) you consider it not, you lay it not to heart, you reflect not upon it, you bewail it not: Or at least are better contented, and sooner quieted, and [Page 179]take less notice of the frame of your Heart in such Duties, than formerly.

Examine farther, how 'tis with you as to the great distinguishing Duties of an up­right Christian, (if performed as they ought to be) I mean Secret Prayer, and Medi­tation: Are you as strict and careful, con­stant and conscientious, frequent and a­bundant in these, as formerly? May not our Closets and places of Retirement wit­ness against us? How seldom are we there? How quickly are we gone? How easily diverted? How soon tired? How do we trifle in that work, and shuffle it over and take up with the shadow and image of Prayer? Our former humble and importu­nate Prayers, joyful Thanksgivings, and sweet Contemplation of the Mysteries of Religion, compared with our present day­ly practice, will testifie that we are de­clin'd and fallen.

Moreover consider the Evil of Sin, and how your Heart stands affected to it. Is not your Hatred of Sin, and Zeal against it much decay'd? especially with respect to inward Spiritual Sins, such as the secret workings of unbelief, and distrust, pride, envy, uncharitableness, &c. Do you bewail it, strive against it, and shun the occasions, and fear the temptations that may lead you into Sin, as once you did? Have you not [Page 180]lost much of that tenderness, and holy Jealousie over your heart and ways you formerly had? Do you not now make more bold with Temptation? Are you not oftener conquered? And with less Relu­ctance? And by smaller Temptations, &c.

Are you not more Ʋnserviceable? Root and Fruit in a withering condition? God less honour'd, and others less profited, and edified by your Example and Life? Do you not adhere more to the World? conform to it, and comply with it in many things, which formerly you durst not have done? And are every day waxing worse? Make a pause a while, and bethink your self, what this will come to at last, when even the little Good that remains, is ready to die.

May I not ask such Christians, or desire them to ask themselves; What is already the effect and consequence of this Declen­sion? Is not God's Spirit removed, and the Light of his Countenance Eclipsed? Yea as to many of them, are they not un­der sad apprehensions of God's displeasure? Do they not feel the terrors of the Lord? Do they not walk heavily from day to day? They, that could once converse with God on all occasions as a Friend, and a Father, do now think of God and are troubled: [Page 181]Thick Darkness doth incompass them round about: They have lost the sense of his Love, the comforts of his presence, and their Song in the night, and see no re­lief. This is a more hopeful Case however than theirs, who are under great Backsli­dings and Desertion, and hardly sensible of it. To awaken and assist both; Con­sider I beseech you, whence you are fallen, and what you have lost, and what will be the Issue of this; if Sickness, or some smart Affliction overtake you; or if you should die in this condition. And inquire seriously, and presently, into the Cause of all this Evil: For a few transient thoughts will not affect the Heart, and persuade to Action. And do it presently, because by every delay your work will be the harder, your dan­ger the greater, and your recovery the more difficult. Reflect upon the Sinfulness as well as Affliction of this case. Know that you have displeased God, and run from him, neglected his Presence, and griev'd his Spirit, and in what Instances you have done so, that hath made him weary of his dwelling; what Ordinances you have slighted; what Duties you have omitted; what sins you have given way to; in order to Repentance and deep Humiliation.

Can you contentedly sit still with this dis­mal State of things? While God hath some­what [Page 182](yea a great deal indeed) against you, for having left your first Love? Will you not endeavour to remove that, which hath made such a Separation between God and you, and brought you thus low? What Communion with God, what Com­munications of his Grace, what Influences of his Spirit, and Evidences of his Favour have you lost? And will you not acknow­ledge your Iniquity, and abase your selves in the Dust, and return to the Lord, and do your first Works? That he may heal your Back-slidings, and receive you gra­ciously; that you may again take hold of his Covenant, and be at Peace with him?

But to be at Peace with God, is not the whole of your Concern; you need not only a Pardon, but a Physician to heal you; as doth a Malefactor, that is not only liable to the Law, but desperately sick. Your State is sinful, and dangerous, as well as troublesome. From performing duties in such a manner as you now do, you may quickly be Tempted to let them altogether alone. God may be so far provok'd, to suffer Satan to make attempts upon you of that kind: (and he is forward enough to make use of such an opportunity, to try all his Snares and Stratagems against you:) till he prevail with you, to think hardly of [Page 183]God himself, ^† unthankfully to overlook all his former kindnesses, to put the worst Interpretation that can be upon all his Pro­vidences, to distrust and quarrel with him, as if his Faithfulness had failed, and his Mercy were clean gone for ever, and there were no hope left for one in your case: and so run into Desperation, and through the subtilty and violence of Satan's Tempta­tions, try the most foolish and unlawful means for ease and cure; either open Li­centiousness, or it may be Self-murder.

Therefore speedy, present Repentance is necessary, to find out, and mortifie every Corruption, and that especially, which Con­science tells us, you have most indulg'd; from whence your Distress doth principally arise: Confessing your Sin freely, fully, and without reserve, and waiting on God in the diligent use of all means, for the recovery of that which you have lost: and justifying God in his Righteousness, Truth, Wisdom, Holiness, in all his Re­bukes. That you may regain a Spirit of Prayer, and taste the sweetness, vertue, and efficacy of every Duty, and of every Ordinance; and God may give you the Garment of Praise for the Spirit of Heavi­ness, and the Joy of the Lord may be your [Page 184]Strength, for future service and suffering.

In the mean time, do not cast away your Hope, but tho' you have (too justly) depriv'd your self of the Faith of Assurance, yet in­deavour to maintain and exercise the Faith of Adherence ^(a). Say unto God, that be­cause there is forgiveness with him, therefore he is to be feared. My sin is not too great to be forgiven. 'Tis not the Ʋnpardonable Sin: For I desire to repent, and am re­solv'd to return. I will still cleave to the Lord, and wait upon him, and follow hard after him, and take no other course for De­liverance and Comfort. Mine is not a sin­gle Case: I am not the only Soul that hath been so distressed, and yet found relief by seeking unto God. 'Tis therefore good for me to hope, and quietly wait for the Salvation of God ^(b). I will draw near to God; I will lie at his foot; and continue in all ways of Worship and Duty, wherein I may hope to meet with the quickening, and com­fort, of his Spirit: I will seek relief from no other; I will keep as near him as I can; whither else shall I go, he alone hath the words of Eternal Life; he alone can create (what is the fruit of his own lips) Peace, Peace.

^* I will encourage my self in the consi­deration of his General Grace, and the pro­babilities of his special Love: I will recol­lect my former Experiences, when I had some good hope, through Grace, concerning my Adoption: I will remember the years of the right hand of the most High. If God will give me so much Grace as to continue wai­ting, I will hope still: And though I walk in darkness, and see little or no Light, I will stay my self on the Lord. And if by the want of sensible Consolation, he will make me more humble, and keep me in a greater Submission to his Will, I will bless his holy Name; and derive more comfortable hope from thence, than from the most sweet and sensible Consolations I ever had; and look upon Humility, Self-denial, Depen­dance on God, Resignation to him, and Hatred of sin, as a better sign of his Love, than the highest fervors of Affection in his service can be.

Oh that I had formerly done as much for Holiness, as I have for Comfort! By the en­joyment of the one, I should have had more of the other: The Exercise of Grace would have discover'd the Truth of it. Let me [Page 186]therefore accuse and condemn my self; but still trust, and love God, and wait upon him. Let me resolve never to chuse a new Lord or Master. Or take up with any Portion beneath God himself; or any way of Hope or Salvation but by Jesus Christ, my only Saviour; neither let me forsake the way of Faith and Holiness, for all the Hopes and Happiness of this World, if put to my choice. But be always able to say, (blessed be God I now can) that I will re­turn to my former Husband, for then it was better with me than now. I had peace and re­freshment in my former ways, I will return to them. Lord, forsake me not utterly! Keep not thine Anger for ever: Cast me not away from thy presence, and take not thy Holy Spirit from me: Restore unto me the Joy of thy Sal­vation, that my Heart may be inlarged to praise thy Name, and to run the way of thy Commandments.

XXVI.

THat we may turn unto the Lord, is the end of searching and trying our Ways. Lord! I have been searching my Heart, and considering my Ways, but can find little or no good; neither can I discover all that is evil in both. But I find enough to make my own Heart condemn me, and Thou, (who art greater than my Heart, and knowest all things,) maist much more con­demn me. I am altogether unclean, pol­luted, and abominable.

If I go about to enumerate the Sins of my Thoughts, Words and Actions, in all the periods of my Life hitherto; if I consider my Omissions of Duty, and dayly Crimes by actual Commission; If I reflect upon my Sins according to their respective Objects, as either against Thee, O God, and against my Neighbour, and against my own Soul or Body; and compare my Heart and [Page 188]Life with thy strict and holy Law, and think in how many Instances I have trans­grest every of thy Righteous Command­ments: I find they are more than the hairs on my Head, they cannot be number'd. Who can tell how oft he hath offended? Many of my sins make little Impression on my Memory, (I observe them not, I remember them not): But this hinders not, but they may make deep Impression on my Conscience, which will one day be awake, and set them in order before me; and they are all writ­ten in thy Book of Remembrance, in order to my final Judgment. All my sins are be­fore thee: But thou requirest my humble Confession of them, in order to Repentance; and as a part thereof, that I freely ac­knowledge their hainous Aggravations to shame, and humble my self the more be­fore thee, whom I have offended and pro­vok'd.

How long did I serve divers Lusts and Pleasures, with the neglect and forgetful­ness of God? How sad a Prospect may I take of the far greatest part of my Life past? Especially of my younger years, which have been trifl'd away in vanity and folly? And since I have known the way of Truth, how shamefully have I prevaricated with God? I am confounded to consider, how often I have despised the Commandment, [Page 189]and rebelled against the Light; against the Principles of Education, and the checks of Conscience, frequent Warnings from God, and Reproofs from Others; contrary to my Profession, and Experience, contrary to the Obligation of peculiar Mercies, solemn Promises, Resolutions, and Engagements, and a nearer Relation to God than many others; Which sins have more dishonour'd the Lord, discredited his Holy Gospel, gra­tifi'd the Devil, scandaliz'd the World, and strengthen'd the hands of the ungodly, than the sins of others. And alas! How much of my precious Time is thus gone, which if duly improv'd, would now afford me comfort to review.

How much Guilt have I contracted every Year, particularly in this last? I now begin another, which will soon be gone, as that which was concluded Yesterday. And shall I only advance in Age, to increase the number of my sins, and heighten my Account against the Day of Reckoning? In Temporal and Civil Affairs, Day unto Day uttereth knowledge, and Night unto Night teacheth Wisdom. We are taught by Expe­rience many useful Lessons, which we should not else have learnt; to reform many Er­rors and mistakes, to correct many rash and foolish Actions, and Speeches, &c. And shall I not learn Wisdom by the Ex­perience [Page 190]of another Year, in what concerns my greatest, my Eternal Interest? Shall not the reflection on my past sins, prevent my Commission of the like? Especially considering how my sins are aggravated, by every Mercy I have received; by every Af­fliction I have undergone; every awaken­ning Sermon I have heard; every motion of God's Spirit, and every check of my own Conscience that I have resisted; every offer of his Grace; every warning of his Provi­dence; every invitation and call of his Word; every purpose to Repent, and every resolution I have made to forsake sin: The greater knowledge I have had of my danger, the longer time I have deliberated about it; the oftner I have confess'd my sin, and been sorry for it; every reproof I have had from others, and every promise I have made my self, doth aggravate, and encrease my Guilt.

How many Years hath God vouchsafed me to work out my Salvation? But how little have I done towards it? Had I died this last Year, how unprepar'd must I have made my Appearance before his Tribunal? What opportunities of doing, and receiving good have I let slip? Have I not made it more my business to seem Religious, than really to be so? How much of the Patience of God have I abus'd? Refusing his Calls [Page 191]to Repentance, resisting the strivings of his Spirit, smothering my Convictions, and turning the Grace of God into wantonness? Instead of returning Gratitude for all his Love, I have repeated my Transgressions after Forgiveness; and gone in a circle of Repenting and Sinning, even to this day. Lord, I am asham'd, and lay my self in the dust before thee. To me belongs nothing but shame and confusion of Face. If God should condemn and punish me as a Rebel, and a Traytor, and give me the Portion of Hypocrites, I cannot but own his Justices; even in Hell I must do it, with my flaming Tongue and Breath.

O spare me, for thy Mercy's sake! Enter not into Judgment with thy servant, for in thy sight shall no flesh living be justified; if Thou lay Judgment to the Line, and Equity to the Plummet. Give me Repentance unto life, never to be repented of, never to be retracted again. Bring me to the Blood of Jesus, which cleanseth from all sin. Behold the sighings of a contrite Spirit: For I acknow­ledge my Transgressions unto thee, against whom I have sinned: O Lord, forgive the Iniquity of my Sin. I am unworthy to lift up my Hands and Eyes towards Heaven, unwor­thy to be called thy Son, or thy Servant: I am vile in mine own eyes, because I have made my self vile in Thine. For this I [Page 192]am troubled, and mourn, and my Soul is grieved within me.

O thou Heavenly Physician of Souls! from thy Pity alone I expect my cure. I am miserable and undone without thy Com­passion; and expect no relief but from the Treasure of thy Grace. I must perish, and sink under the burden of Sin, if thy merciful hand do not save me, and lift me up. I am intangl'd and insnar'd by the Devil and my Lusts, and without thy Suc­cour can never hope to get free. O Lord, forgive my Sin, and heal my Soul: Deliver and save me, for thy Mercies sake.

May I not yet hope in thy Mercy? Thou hast mercifully born with me hitherto: Thou callest me to repent; thou com­mandest me to return, and promisest to forgive those Sins, which are confessed and forsaken: O do not cast me out of thy Sight and Presence, now I desire, from the bottom of my Heart, to return to thee! I abhor my self, in dust and ashes, for my past Iniquities. But alas! such is the hardness of my Impenitent Heart, that I am even asham'd of my humblest Repentance: how much more may God despise and reject it? But hast thou not given thy Blessed Son to die for Sinners? and exalted him to this very end, to be a Prince, and a Saviour, to give Repentance, and Remission of Sins? And [Page 193]by the word of thy Grace, thou beseechest all (even the greatest Sinners) to accept of mercy; and art more willing to Pardon, than we can be to Repent. 'Tis thy De­light and Glory, agreeable to thy Nature, and declared Name, as a God gracious, and merciful, slow to Anger; and of great Kind­ness, forgiving Iniquity, Transgression, and Sin. O Pardon mine Iniquity, for it is great; and receive an humble Penitent, who implores thy Grace, according to the Tenor of thy new Covenant, flying to the Arms of thy Mercy, through the Merits of Jesus Christ, who is able to save to the uttermost, all that come unto God by him.

Lord, hear my Prayer, and let not the mixture of my weaknesses and unworthi­ness turn it into Sin: but graciously vouch­safe to look upon a Returning Prodigal; and cause me to hear the voice of Joy and Gladness, that my sorrowful Heart may be comforted, and my life be directed to thy Praise. Lead me into the path of life, that I may no longer err from the way of thy Commandments: Teach me to do thy Will, O God, and write thy Law upon my Heart, that I may never more return to Folly. I am convinc'd of the Evil of Sin, of thy Right to govern me, of the Equity and Justice of thy Law, of the Sweetness and Rewards of keeping thy Precepts: O [Page 194]sanctifie my Heart, and make me Sound in thy Statutes, that I may hate every false way, and be devoted to thy Fear, the re­mainder of my Life.

If there be any particular Lust, or Wick­edness, which through the power of Temp­tation, and the deceitfulness of Sin, you have fallen into; that hath wasted Consci­ence, and robb'd you of your Peace, and provok'd God to write bitter things against you; be sure to humble your self with­out delay, in an especial manner, for that Back-sliding: Confess it freely, with its Aggravations. Consider whether it was not after some special manifestation of God's Love, after some special Warning, some strong Conviction, under or soon after some great Affliction from God, or some more than ordinary Kindness of his Providence, &c. And impress such Thoughts, to humble your self the lower, search into the grounds and causes of such Apostacy, such as the abatement of your Watchfulness, the neglect of serious closet-Devotion, making bold with Temptation, too great compliance with vain Company, venturing too far in lawful or indifferent Things, too much Confidence in your own Wisdom, Strength, and Stedfastness, not fearing sufficiently the Approaches and Beginnings of Sin, or avoiding the fuel, [Page 195]incentives, and occasions of it, &c. Pal­liate and disguise nothing, that may make your Sin exceeding sinful, lest by some lit­tle Art of the Devil, you deceive your self, by an half-Repentance; and the Evil Spirit you think to be cast out, return again with seven worse than himself, and so your latter end be worse than your Beginning. For if the Sin be not truly hated, but only co­ver'd over with penitential Ashes, it will quickly flame out again, when it meets with combustible Matter, and a strong blast of Temptation.

But if you are griev'd to the very Heart, and abhorr the Sin, and resolve to quit it, you need not doubt of God's readiness to receive you to Mercy. His Spirit is yet striving with you, if you are willing to Repent, and return to God. He sought you, and call'd you to return, when you were wandring as a lost sheep in the broad way: And can you think he will not be found of you, if you seek him with your whole Heart? Therefore renew your Re­pentance, and beg more earnestly a Spirit of Humility, Holy Fear, and Watchfulness: And every Morning implore Divine suc­cours against that Sin, and all Temptations to it, (which, as much as possible, you must avoid.) Constant and fervent Prayer, after Repentance, must be your Refuge, and your [Page 196]Remedy. If you let fall your Hands, this Amaleck will prevail again. As soon and as far as you fail in the Constancy, and Fer­vency of that Duty, your Sin will get strength, and successfully attempt you ano­ther time. But by this Practice, God may turn Evil to work for Good, make you gain by your Loss, stand the faster by your Falls, and become stronger by the discovery of your Weakness, and so be better estab­lish'd for the future.

But take heed that you pervert not the Grace of God, and encourage your self to sin again by the Supposition, that if you should Fall, 'tis but to Repent, and renew your Resolutions, and all will be well. This is a subtile Artifice of Satan, but such, me­thinks, as should take with none, who have ever known by Experience, what it is to Repent. Who have felt the burden of Sin to be heavier than a Milstone; than the weight of a Mountain. Who have tasted, how evil and bitter a thing it is, to de­part from God. Who have loathed and ab­horr'd themselves, with deep Remorse, and Sorrow, and Anguish of Spirit: wish­ing with all their Hearts, that they had not sinn'd; and if it were in their power, would give all the World to retrieve it; and would rather die, than commit that Folly ²⁴ [Page 197] again, they then repented of. Let those who have not their own Experience to con­firm this, read over (and consider the Case of David, when he wrote) the Peniten­tial Psalms. How many, like him, have roar'd, and cry'd out under the sense of Sin, of stings and furies in their Conscience, of the poison'd Arrows in their Souls, and his Terrors surrounding them where-ever they went; from the sense of his Sins Malig­nity, the apprehensions of God's Anger, and the consequent Fears of his Wrath. Serious Repentance after great Transgressions, is another Thing than most imagine it. When their aggravated Sins shall beset them be­hind, and before, be placed in order be­fore their eyes, and set in array against them. 'Tis always a work of Difficulty, as well as Importance, to crucifie corrupt af­fections, to tear a beloved Lust from the Heart, with self-indignation to abhorr and cast away what before you lov'd and de­lighted in. How did David's Sin stare him in the Face? It is continually with me, it is ever before me, said He. It haunted him like a Spectre, or like Belshazzar's Hand­writing on the Wall, it still appear'd be­fore him in some horrid shape.

However Sin may smile in its first ad­dress, and bespeak us in flattering lan­guage, and promise Pleasure, and Profit, [Page 198]and great Advantages and Satisfaction; these are but fair Appearances; This is but the outside of the Cup, and the Colour of the Liquor: It will prove Gail and Worm­wood, and a mixture of deadly Poison, if ever God set it home upon the Consci­ence, and awaken us to a true sense of it. And the Continuance of daily Repentance for Sin, which all Christians are called to, is no such easie matter neither. Constant Self-abasement, and Humiliation before God, from a sense of his Majesty and Holi­ness, and of our many Sins, and Pollution thereby: The imperfection of our best Du­ties continually to be bewailed; inordinate Affections to be still mortified; always re­sisting and opposing Sin, in its Root and Branches; conflicting against the whole Interest of the Flesh, the World, and the Devil; seeking after more Holiness, to be deriv'd unto us by the Grace of Christ, to be wrought in us by his Spirit, and maintain'd by his Power; and making daily Applications to the Fountain of all Grace, for spiritual strength, to continue our war­fare against Sin, in all Instances of outward Duty, and inward Actings of Grace, even as long as we live; all this is included in it. Due Apprehensions concerning Repentance, (as so comprehensive and difficult a Duty,) would teach us to beware of Sin.

XXVII.

HAving acknowledg'd my Transgressi­ons unto God, and begg'd Forgive­ness, and experimentally learn'd the Evil of Sin, by the bitterness of Repentance, I resolve, for the future, to watch against it more nar­rowly, and against every thing that leads to it; endeavouring to please and honour my God and Saviour, by an upright, obedient Heart and Life. And for the Remission of my former contracted Guilt, I trust to Jesus Christ, according to the Revelation made in the Gospel, of what he is, hath done, and suffer'd, and continues to do in Heaven, for the Salvation of Repenting Sinners, who desire to come unto God by Him.

But how often, O my Soul! have I mock'd God, and deceiv'd my self, with formal and faint Purposes of Amendment? My good Resolutions have been all of them as the morning Cloud, and the early Dew, which quickly passed away. One fresh assault of Temptation hath swept away all my good [Page 200]Purposes as a Spider's Web. I have falsified so many, and broke my word so often, that I dare not trust to any thing I now resolve, or rely on any Promise I should farther make. Succour me therefore, O Lord, by thy pow­erful Grace, that what was defective in my former fruitless Resolutions, may be now rectified. Let me be more humble in the sense of my Weakness, more dependant on thy Grace, and more heartily seek it from time to time. Strengthen me with Strength in my Soul, with Might and Power in my inward man, that I may so resolve and pur­pose, as to perform; that I may not be one day hot, and the next cold; zealous in the Beginning, but faint and lukewarm in the Brogress; fervent and serious only in Re­solving, but weak and impotent in the Exe­cution.

Having chang'd my Master, my End, and my Hopes, by returning unto God, from whom I had gone astray, I firmly resolve, through the assistance of his Grace, to change my Course of Life; that Old things being done away, all things may be­come New; that ^* being made free from sin, by pardoning Mercy, and become the servant of Christ, I may have my fruit unto Holiness, that my End may be Eternal Life. In the inte­rim, [Page 201]whether I live or die, let it be unto the Lord, resolving both in Life and Death to be ab­solutely his. And to that purpose, O my Soul! Let me seek for continual supplies of Grace from Christ my Head, to enable me to yield ready Obedience, in the most difficult, hazardous, painful, and humbling Duties. In vain do I resolve it, without the assistance of his mighty Power, to strengthen my Heart and Hands, when­ever I am called to such a trial of my Since­rity. Without it I shall never recover my Liberty, or break asunder those Bonds and Cords wherewith I have formerly been held Captive, as the Servant of Sin and Satan. Such is the Weakness and Treache­ry of my own Heart, the influence of ill Examples, and the subtlety and cunning of the Tempter, that otherwise I shall quickly change my mind, and return to Folly, as the Dog to his Vomit. The Spirit is so weak, and the Flesh so frail; the Snares of the World so many, the Power of re­maining Corruption so strong; and of my self I am so unsetled and wavering, sickle and unsteady, and prone to back-sliding, that all my strongest purposes will not be sufficient, without daily strength from a­bove. My Senses are so deceitful; my Pas­sions so ungovernable? the Rule and Law I am to walk by, so strict, and spiritual, [Page 202]and extensive: Criminal Omissions may be so frequent, and so easily overlook'd; so many several and difficult Duties are to be performed; and by every change of my Condition, or of God's Providence, so many new Dangers and new Duties may arise, that I fear the issue of my firmest Re­solutions. So strict a Watch must always be kept; such Humility and Caution is every­where to be practis'd; such speedy Repen­tance requir'd after every fall; with thank­fulness and contentment in every State, un­der all Calamities, (be they never so many, or never so pinching;) and perseverance herein absolutely necessary, though never so many Stratagems be used to discourage me from proceeding, or to entice me to go back, or turn aside to some other Path; in­somuch that if God had not promised me his continued Presence, and that his Grace shall be sufficient for me, and that I shall not be tempted above what I am able to bear; I should utterly despair of making good what I now resolve.

But besides these Promises to encourage my Resolved Obedience, he hath left upon Record in his Word many glorious Exam­ples, of his assisting and rewarding the Cou­rage and Resolution of his Servants to con­tinue faithful; as in the case of Joseph, Da­niel, and his Three Friends, &c. If Christ [Page 203]stand by, and strengthen me, I know I shall be able to do all things; I shall not then be flatter'd, or frighted out of the way of my Duty; no Wind that can blow shall then turn me to another Point; nothing shall then be able to prevail for my consent to a wilful and deliberate forsaking of God; no Argument, no Temptation, though Pri­vacy, Opportunity, Impunity from Men, with Rewards of Wordly Gain and Ho­nour, should all concur to enforce a Tem­ptation. But, by that Heavenly Assistance, I shall be preserv'd Humble, Temperate, Chast, Patient, Thankful, Self-denying, Crucified to the World, and hold fast my Integrity till I die; still perfecting Holiness in the fear of God, growing in Grace, and in the Knowledge of my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, waxing stronger from day to day, be seldomer surpriz'd, offend less, and re­pent more quickly, and watch more nar­rowly afterwards, till at last I receive the Crown.

Especially, let me watch against my Con­stitution Sins, such as I am most inclin'd to, and where a Temptation doth most easily en­ter; where the Devil can take the fastest hold, and be least suspected; where he hath formerly sprung a Mine, and made a Breach: I have known some humble watchful Chri­stians, after being recovered from their [Page 204]Back-slidings, who abhorr'd every Tem­ptation to that sin, by which they had been defiled and wounded: They can hardly put up a Prayer, but they mention it; hardly have their hearts affected in any Ordinance, but they are inwardly asham'd of it; hard­ly hear of any one guilty of the like, but they are ready to burst out into Tears.

Fix therefore, I beseech thee, most Gracious God! My unfeigned Resolutions of cleaving to thee, with full purpose of Heart: And shew thy strength in my weakness, by inabling me to do what I now resolve. To that end, teach me to watch over my Heart, to keep it with all diligence, to be more con­versant with my own Thoughts, examining the motions that arise in my Heart, whence they come, and whither they go, and what they tend to, that I may suppress the be­ginnings of Sin. The unsearchable Deceit­fulness of the Heart, the rovings, straglings and wandrings of the Thoughts, the ungo­vernable motions and stirrings of the Pas­sions and Affections, with the corrupt Incli­nations that are ready to comply with Tem­ptation, make such a constant Watchfulness necessary. Let me live no longer as a stran­ger to my self, but by Self-Reflection dwell more at home, reckoning my principal Work to be within-doors, to keep my own Vineyard. Teach me to watch over my [Page 205] Senses, to guard the door of my Lips, to govern my Passions; to be wary in the Choice of my Company, and in the Right Ʋse of it; to be Circumspect in every step of my daily walk, to call my self frequently to a Reckoning, to cast up my Accounts at the foot of every Page (by every days review of my Actions,) to live always as in God's Presence, and be awed every where by the thought of his Holy Eye, to shun the occa­sions and appearances of Evil, &c.

By the neglect of this, Spiritual Distem­pers will insensibly creep upon us. There is such a venom and malignity in Sin, to wound and weaken the Soul, to put us off the Hinges, to disorder and unfit us for any Spiritual Service, to make our Hearts vain and frothy, lazy and listless, that we shall easily let slip our Opportunities, lose our Seasons, and languish and pine away, not­withstanding all the means of thriving and growth. And hence it is that so many Professors mourn and complain, lick the dust, and lie among the Clods, are dead under the most awakening Ministry, and barren under the most fruitful means. Hence it is they do little Good, as well as taste little Comfort; some Duties are neg­lected, and others perform'd slightly; and in none of them do they meet with that Sweetness and Satisfaction, that Re­freshment, [Page 206]and Advantage, Fruit and Benefit, as formerly. And all from the neglect of Watchfulness, making bold with Temptation, and not standing upon their Guard in the use of their Christian Ar­mour.

And because no Place, no Condition, no Imployment is exempted from Tempta­tations, let me fortify my self every morning against all Assaults for that day, by Serious Prayer, as Holy David was wont to do. My voice (saith he) shalt thou hear in the morning, O Lord; in the morning will I direct my Prayer unto thee, and will look up, Psal. 5. v. 3, 4. Let the Law of God be my daily and delightful study: that I may be able pre­sently to bring my Words and Actions to the Touchstone; and know how to ma­nage the sword of the Spirit, on all occasions, against the fiery Darts of the Devil: That knowing the Rule, I may not be doubtful, or at a loss; whenever I am tempted, I may not make a stand to parley, but imme­diately summon all my forces to resist, and reject the Snare; being assur'd from God, that the Continuance of this Warfare shall end in a most Glorious Victory. He will shortly tread down Satan under my feet. Thanks be to God, through Jesus Christ, my Lord.

XXVIII.

ALL this, O my Soul, which I have now resolv'd on, is no more than what I am obliged to by my Vow in Bap­tism; to renounce the Devil and his Works, the Flesh and the Lusts thereof, the World, and Conformity to it, that I may Love and Serve the Lord: Agreeable to the undoubt­ed Right which God hath in me by Crea­tion, Redemption, and his innumerable o­ther Benefits. But the outward washing of Baptism, and a visible profession of obedi­ence, will not save me, without the Answer of a good Conscience towards God; 1 Pet. chap. 3. v. 21. May I not by the consideration of my Baptismal Covenant suppose God speak­ing to my Conscience, to this effect? ‘Will you take me for your whole Portion and Felicity? And my Law for the constant Rule of your obedience? And fight a­gainst the World, the Flesh, and the Devil, to your lives end? Will you be­lieve [Page 208]in Jesus Christ, and receive him as a Prince and Saviour? And adhere to the faith and obedience of the Gospel, how hazardous and difficult soever the profes­sion and practice of it may be? Will you receive the Blessed Spirit as your Teacher, Sanctifier, and Comforter? and cherish all his Motions, to enlighten, purify, confirm, comfort, and assist you?’ 'Tis my hearty consent to these Terms, and re­solved compliance with them, which Bap­tism obligeth to; and this is the Answer of a good Conscience towards God.

I have often renewed this Covenant on se­veral Occasions; but did I ever duly con­sider the tenor and obligation of it? How have I lyed unto the God of Truth? Dealt deceitfully with him? and been False and Fickle, Treacherous and Unfaithful to what I promised? O let me now again repeat it, and give up my self once more to be the Lord's, more unfeignedly, more firmly than ever I have hitherto done! That the Bonds of God upon me may be strengthened, and my Soul more throughly ingag'd to be the Lord's. O help me to do it with the greatest seriousness, as the most important Affair of my whole Life! By thine Aid and Grace alone, shall I be sincere and cordial in this sur­render, and Dedication of my self. O breathe upon my Soul, most Holy Spirit, (the Power [Page 209]of the highest) that there may be no Hy­pocrifie, or Reservation, in this so weighty and solemn Transaction between God and me!

O most Blessed and Glorious TRINITY! Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, thy favour is my Life, and thy Loving kindness is bet­ter than Life: Thy Will should have been my Rule, thy Word my Law, thy Glory my End, to please thee my principal Busi­ness, and to enjoy thy Love and Presence my ultimate Felicity. But I am one of thy revolted Creatures, who have lost thine I­mage, and rebell'd against thy Law, slight­ed thy Authority, and rejected thy Grace, and deserve to be cast out of thy sight, and banisht from thy Presence for ever. Ne­vertheless, O most merciful God, and Father, upon thy gracious Invitation and Call, I now return to thee my rightful Lord: ac­knowledging thee, as my Almighty, Wise, and bountiful Creator, my absolute Owner, my Righteous Governour, my End, my Happiness, and Chief Good. I now accept thine offer'd Mercy; I now submit to the Scepter of thy Grace; and give up my self to Thee, as my King, and my God; to rule and sanctifie me now, and be my Ever­lasting Portion. I desire to be no longer my own, but Thine, to whom of right I be­long, and ought to be devoted. I yield [Page 210]my self to Thee, O my Lord! Accept and possess that which is thine own. I lay my self at thy Foot, at all Times, and in all Conditions, to be at thy dispose, and in every thing to acquiesce in thy good Plea­sure. Deliberately resolving, with un­feigned and free consent of my Will, to walk before Thee in Holiness and Righte­ousness all the days of my Life. Hereby I consecrate and devote my self to be thy per­petual, Avowed Servant: Lord, I am thy servant, I am thy servant, the Son of thine Handmaid. Though other Lords have had dominion over me, I will now make men­tion of thy Name, and of thy Righteous­ness only, by Jesus Christ.

O blessed Jesus, my All-sufficient Saviour! Thy dying Love, infinite Condescention, and matchless Grace hath at last overcome me, and constrain'd me to resolve to be wholly Thine, who hast redeem'd and bought me with thy most precious Blood. I now ac­knowledge and own Thee, as my Lord, and my Jesus, my Prophet, Priest, and King; my Sacrifice, Surety, and Ransom, to satisfy for my Sins, and reconcile me unto God; to instruct me in his Will, and teach me the Mysteries of his Kingdom, and the way to the Father. How often hast thou open'd thine arms, and called me, yea beseech'd me to come unto thee, and accept of Life? [Page 211]but I refused to come. I adore thy merciful Condescention, that yet thou wilt receive me on such easie Terms.

O thou Lord of Life and Glory, now ac­cept of an unworthy helpless Sinner, who flies to Thee as his only Refuge and Hope! who is convinc'd, that None but Christ, None but Christ can make his Peace with God, and save from wrath to come. I acknowledge thy Title to me, and my Obedience, and to all I have by dying for me. I desire to take thy Yoke upon me, for it is Easie; and thy Burthen, which is Light. I desire to be in­tirely, and for ever thine, in an Everlasting Covenant, never to be broken: To take up the Cross, and follow thee, whithersoever thou shalt lead me; through the straight Gate, and the narrow way. I will reserve no Lust, refuse no Labour, grudge at no Suffering, stick at no Difficulty, so I may please, and honour thee, and continue in thy Love. O shed abroad more of thy Love in my Heart, to make all Things easie for his sake, who hath loved me, and washed me from my Sins in his own Blood.

O God the Holy Ghost, I acknowledge Thee, as my Great Teacher and Sanctifier, and give up my self to Thee, as the Author of all saving Knowledge and Holiness: By Thee I have been convinc'd of my Sin, against the Law of God, and the Gospel of Christ, [Page 212]and of my necessity of his Merit, Satisfa­ction, and Righteousness, to justify my guilty Soul, by procuring the Forgiveness of Sin, and my Acceptance with God; and of the freeness of his Love, the Riches and All-sufficiency of his Grace, towards all who come unto God by him. I adore Thee, O most blessed Spirit, as proceeding, and sent from the Father and the Son, to renew all the Powers of my Soul, and restore the Divine Image there; to enlighten my mind, to know and receive the Truth, as it is in Jesus, and purify my Heart: and to sanctifie all the Members of my Body, and make them Instruments of Righteousness unto Holiness, which before were Servants unto Sin; and gradually to deliver me from the power, the defilement, and a­bode of Sin; as from the Guilt and Pu­nishment by the Blood of Jesus. And as the Witness of God to the Truth of the Holy Scriptures; and as the Great Para­clete, to comfort and establish the Hearts of Believers, sealing them up to the day of Redemption, and giving them the Earnest of the Heavenly Inheritance. O blessed Spi­rit, be thou my Witness, that though I have violated the Law of God, and defac'd his Image, and formerly undervalu'd the Love of Christ, and the Grace of the Gospel, yet by thine Aid, I now accept what I have [Page 213]so long neglected: And thankfully devote my self henceforward to be the Lord's, in a Covenant Relation.

But fearing and distrusting my self, I give up my self entirely to the conduct of thy Grace, depending upon it for my establishment and perseverance. O form my Heart into an obediential Frame! that in every thing I may endeavour to answer the Ends and Obligations of this Devoted State.

To this One God I have once again dedi­cated and resign'd my self; to serve, and please and honour Thee, in Thought, Word, and Act, to the last moment of my Life: In the Performance of all Duties, even those which I have been most averse from; in the mortification of every Lust, and the forsaking of every Sin, even those which I was once most addicted to: Resolving de­liberately to allow my self in nothing, great or little, secret or open, which I shall know or believe to be contrary to thy holy Will; making it my business to be fruitful in good Works, to the Praise of my Redeemer; waiting in the use of all his appointed means, for higher measures of Grace and Holiness, to be more Victorious over in­ward Lusts, and outward Temptations, still pressing towards the mark for the prize of my high and holy Calling, even Eternal Life.

I call Heaven and Earth, O Lord, to witness this day, That I own and avow this to be my Mind, and the setled Prevail­ing Purpose of my Soul. This I again ra­tifie and confirm, without any Clauses, or Exceptions. So help me, O my God. Glo­ry be to God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit.

XXIX.

I Have this day solemnly Avouched the Lord to be my God, to walk in his ways; thereby to fortifie my Resolutions, that I and my ^*House, (and All that I can persuade to be of my mind) will serve the Lord. I intend, desire, and hope never will­fully to Violate the Faith, which I have now plighted in the presence of God; but to continue stedfast, unmoveable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, &c.

Should I undertake any new Imploy­ment, or enter into any new Condition, or change the place of my Abode, where I might see more of God's dishonour, and [Page 215]meet with more and stronger Temptations to Sin, and be called to the performance of more difficult Duties, greater Watchful­ness, and Self-denial, &c. I would hope hereby to engage the Presence of God with me, and his Blessing on all my Affairs, (on which depends the success of all that I undertake:;) and would hope the better to preserve my Integrity, not only This Year, but in all the remaining portion of my Time, by the abiding sense of my Covenant with God, thus seriously re­newed.

This is the Method I have been often advis'd to, for Peace of Conscience, under doubts and scruples concerning my spiritual state; to put the matter out of doubt, by again accepting the offered Mercy and Grace of the Gospel; and heartily consent­ing to the New Covenant: giving up my self to God in Christ, to be ruled and saved by him. Blessed be God, I have now done so. Lord, say Amen, to thy part of the Covenant, that Thou art, and wilt be my God; as I desire unfeignedly to do to mine, that I will be thy Servant.

But because Articles are sooner consen­ted to, than made good; tho' I seriously intend never to disown this my solemn Act and Deed, but firmly to adhere to it, as long as I live; that having sworn, I will en­deavour [Page 216]to perform it, that this shall be my Everlasting Choice, never to be recanted or alter'd, yet) considering the sad In­stances of my former Weakness, and the vigilance and subtle malice of my Great Adversary, I again implore the succour of Divine Grace, to keep it for ever in the pur­pose of my Heart, that it may be as the Laws of the Medes and Persians, never to be reversed. I have given up my Name to be Thine; O put thy fear into my Heart, that I may never depart from Thee! Imprint thy Laws upon my Heart, that my Obedience may be uniform and universal, unwaver­ing and perpetual; suitable to so honou­rable and near a Relation to Thee! I am sensible I want Wisdom and Strength to that purpose, but thou hast bid me ask it of Thee, who givest liberally to All, without desert, and upbraidest not, with present un­worthiness, or former faults. O lead me not into Temptation, but deliver me from Evil. Stand by and strengthen me in the Hour of Trial, lest I forget my Vows, and deny thee. O that my Soul may never draw back, lest Thine have no pleasure in me. I can serve no better Master; O let mine Ears be bored to the door of thine House, as the Token and Assurance of my being thy Servant unto Death. I know 'tis my Duty, I am sensible 'tis my Privilege and [Page 217]Honour; I am convinc'd, that 'tis my In­terest and Felicity; my Soul, my Life, my present and everlasting Welfare, and All de­pends upon it, that thou shouldest be my God for ever: O conduct me by thy Holy Spirit of Grace, that I may walk, and act, as having heartily consented he should be so; and direct my Heart into thy Love, and the faithful keeping of thy Commandments: That when so many Professors make ship­wrack of Faith, and a good Conscience, and discredit the Religion of my Lord, by their shameful Falls, thou may'st make me to stand, and improve the warning of their Examples to walk humbly; and while I stand, to take heed lest I fall.

Having thus surrendred my self to God, what is there, O my Soul! that is ever like to prevail with me to go back, and revolt from him? Is the gratification of a Lust, the securing of an Estate, compliance with a Friend, the pleasing of a Superior, living in Ease, and Honour, and outward Prosperity for a little while, the saving my Body from Suffering, or my Life from Violence, or what­ever else be the motive of my Unfaithful­ness to God, and Apostacy from him? Is Any, is All of these any way considerable, compared with the Blessedness of having God to be my God? For thereby I have the For­giveness of all my Sins; and the Assurance [Page 218]of his Favour; the certainty of present Protection, and Provision; all Creatures reconciled to me, and to be employed for my Good, as the Friend of God; All things to work together for my Advan­tage; and by the evidence of my Adoption, a well-grounded Hope of Eternal Life. God, as my Sun and Shield, will give Grace and Glory, and with-hold no good Thing. So unspeakably Comprehensive are the Privi­leges of so near a Relation to God in Christ. O happy are the People who are in such a case! Blessed are the Persons whose God is the Lord.

Do I resolve to abide by my Choice, and to trust in Christ for Persevering Grace? And shall I not, ought I not to take Comfort in it? Shall I not give God the Glory of his infinite Goodness, by adhering to him, and rejoycing in him, notwithstanding all Temptations to the contrary? Casting all my Care upon him, and quieting my self in the All-sufficiency of my Heavenly Fa­ther; having a God in Covenant, who will supply all my wants, and take care of me, as his own? Shall I not give him the Glory of his Truth and Power, by trusting him in every Condition? By Confidence in his Promise, Dependance on his Word, Faith­fulness to his Interest, and Constancy in his Service to the end? Is it not a most [Page 219]encouraging Thought, That God doth ne­ver abandon any, who do not first forsake him? And after such strict Engagements, as I have laid upon my self, shall I ever strike the fatal stroke with my own Hand? Shall I be off and on, say and unsay, promise and retract? And after I have proceeded thus far, shall I forsake the Fountain of Living Waters, and turn again to broken Cisterns?

After I have examin'd my self, consi­der'd my ways, confess'd my Sins, and upon serious Deliberation am come to a Resolve, and in pursuance of it, have devoted my self with such solemnity to be the Lord's, shall I ever, after this, forsake Him, and my own Mercies, and lightly esteem the Rock of my Salvation? Now I have learn'd, in some measure, what Sin is, by the sorrows and anguish of an Hearty Repentance; now I have discover'd so much of the Snares and Devices of Satan, whereby I have former­ly been betray'd; now I am sensible of the dangerous and powerful influence and infe­ction of bad Company; the Treachery of fleshly Lusts; the bewitching Temptations of the World; and have tasted a little, by my own Experience, of the Pleasantness of Wisdom's Paths, the Peace and Satis­faction of Devotedness to God, by the pre­sent Rewards of a calm Conscience, the [Page 220]communications of Divine Grace, and the Encouragement of an Holy Hope, &c. and am persuaded of the Stability of his Word, and the Certainty of Eternal Life to all who continue in Well-doing; shall I, after all this, ever break with God again? Shall I ever cancel this Engagement? violate this my vow? and falsifie so many repeated Pro­mises and Resolutions?

Oh, that his Power may rest upon me! and his Grace work in me, both to will, and to do! that this God may be my God for ever, and my Guide unto Death. Let me never re-assume this Gift, and Surrender of my self, or de­fraud God of his Right and Propriety. His I am, and him I will serve: living wholly to Him; using all I have for him: being willing he should do what he list with his own, and consequently dispose of me, and of all that any way belongs to me, as shall seem good in his eyes. I am Thine; O Lord, save me. Command me my work, ap­point me my Duty, direct my Station, or­der my Condition. Let me be Thine, tho' employed in the meanest service, and the most laborious self-denying work. Tho' I should be but a Door-keeper in thine House, an Hewer of Wood, or a Drawer of Water; Tho' I must pinch the flesh, and swim against the Tide, and renounce what before I va­lued: yet This God shall be my God for ever.

By this means, when I come to die, (if God should add more Years to the lit­tle number I have past, besides this I have now begun) I may be able to say, with Upright Hezekiah, Remember, Lord, how I have walked before Thee in mine Integrity; that in the face of Death, and the Grave, in the view of another World, and the near prospect of Eternity, I may be able to Re­joyce in Hope, and say, Lord Jesus, Re­ceive my Spirit. Thou art my Saviour, and I have waited for thy Salvation. I have sought Thee with my whole Heart; I have chosen thy Favour, rather than World­ly Grandeur and Prosperity; I have prized thy Love, and endeavour'd to obey Thee, (as the best Expression of my own) tho' with many Imperfections, which I bewail; I have delighted more in thy Service and Presence, than in the Pleasures of Sin and Vanity; thy Testimonies have been the Joy of my Heart; I took no delight in the Company of the Ungodly, after I was de­voted to Thee; O let me not have my Portion with them in the other World! Fortifie me now against the King of Ter­rors, strengthen me in this my last Con­flict, enable me to triumph over Death, by the Cross of Christ (my victorious Redeemer) and carry me through the dark valley, at the divorce of Soul and Body; and grant [Page 222]me an abundant entrance into thine Hea­venly Kingdom; Let me be numbred a­mong thy Chosen, and my Body wait in Hope, till the General Resurrection, that I may then see thy Glory, and dwell with Thee for ever.

I gave up my self to Thee, and do not repent my Choice; acknowledge me now for Thine, and do not lose that which is thy own. Lord Jesus! Thou hast paid my Ransom, to deliver me from Satan, and from Eternal Wrath; Oh, do not now reject me, and cast me off. Is it not thine Office and Covenant, to save those that Trust in Thee? Oh, remember thy Word unto thy Servant, wherein thou hast cau­sed me to Hope, when I ventured my Sal­vation on thy Promise, and trusted to thy Gracious Word, for Eternal Life. Thy Love hath already overcome the greatest impediments of my Salvation. 'Tis as easie now to receive me as to Love me. Thou hast prepared Glory for thy Redeemed ones; and hast bid me believingly to fol­low thee, and wait for thy Salvation. Thou hast begotten me to a lively hope, by the Incorruptible Seed of the Word; Let me not now be depriv'd of the Inheritance. Can that Love, that pitied me in my Blood, and fetcht me from the Gates of Hell, now suffer me to fall into it? Oh, Crown [Page 223]thy Grace, and perfect thy Preparatory Mercy, with Everlasting Mercy.

By voluntary Consent and Choice, thou art my God; and thy Presence in Heaven, my ultimate Felicity; I have trusted to thy Gracious Promise, to prepare me for it, and bring me to it; O fulfil thy Word unto thy Servant, wherein thou hast caused me to hope; and mercifully receive my departing Soul, that seeks Thee, that loves Thee, that breathes after Thee, and desires no­thing but to know Thee better, and love Thee more, and be more entirely con­form'd to thine Image, and live always in thy Blessed Presence. Thou hast called me out of the World, plac'd thine Image upon me, enabled me to make it my Business, though with many Imperfections, to serve, and please, and honour Thee; Oh, Receive me to the fulness of thy Love, and Grace, and present me faultless before the Presence of thy Glory, with exceeding Joy. Amen, Holy Father, be it unto me according to thy Word; through the Merits and Intercession of my All-sufficient Saviour, Jesus Christ, the Faithful and True Witness, in whom all thy Promises are Yea, and Amen.

XXX.

HOW precious and delightful are the Thoughts of thy Benefits? O Lord, how great is the sum of them? Should I count them, they are more in number than the Stars. Shall I not observe and consider them? maintain a grateful sense of them, and publickly acknowledge them on all oc­casions? that I may Bless the Lord at all Times, and his Praise be continually in my mouth. More especially should I conclude and begin the Year, with solemn Praises to my Great Benefactor and Preserver. I ought to be­gin and close every Day with it, thereby to make the out-goings of the Morning and the Evening to rejoyce in God. Every Year, every Day, every Hour, every Moment, offers me an occasion to Praise him: because he is every minute gracious, and hath been so ever since he gave me my Being.

Almost one half of my Time hath been spent in Sleep, when I remember not God, nor my self; yet doth He, who never slum­bers nor sleeps, remember me in Mercy, and [Page 225]watch over me for good. Yea, though in the other half, by Day, I have forgotten him in a worse sense, by casting off his Fear, and not remembring that his Holy Eye is upon me, yet hath he not forgotten to be Gracious. Therefore I will praise the name of God with a Song, and will magnifie him with Thanksgiving, and never forget his benefits. With which Sacrifice he is better pleased, than with an Ox or Bullock, that hath horns and hoofs.

He hath prolonged my Life this last Year, when so many others, of his more useful Servants, have been remov'd by Death; and given me farther Time and Space to Repent, when multitudes have been sur­priz'd in their Impenitence. Yea, it was He, who formed me in the Womb, and brought me safely into the World, by whose Providence I have hitherto been supplied: In Him I live, and move, and con­tinually exist: To his undeserved Goodness I am beholding, for all the Good, of any kind, which I ever enjoy'd: To his Bounty I am indebted for all that I now have; and must depend upon it, for whatever I can hereafter expect.

Through Infancy and Childhood he was pleas'd to preserve me; favouring me with many Advantages in my Birth and Educa­tion; providing for me a competent Live­lihood; ²⁷ [Page 226]disposing the Circumstances of my Condition, Relations, Places of Abode, &c. more advantageously than he hath done for Thousands: affording me many Helps, for the Improvement of my Mind, and the en­crease of Knowledge; and preventing my Necessities, and even my Desires, with numberless Blessings, which I never so much as ask'd for. He hath caused several of my Relations to yield me Comfort, when they might have been sore Afflictions. He hath raised up Strangers to befriend me, and shew me Kindness. How many favours have I receiv'd from God, by the Instru­mentality of other Men? to whom God gave the Will, and the Power, the Oppor­tunity, and the Inclination?

How often hath he deliver'd my Soul from Death, mine Eyes from Tears, and my Feet from falling, by seasonable Preservations? so that I do yet walk before him in the Land of the Living. He hath rescu'd me from the brink of many a Precipice, which, through Ignorance or Inadvertency, I did not ap­prehend or fear. When I knew not which way to turn, he hath made my Path plain. Under sinking Disappointments, he hath com­manded Succour; and been a present Help in the time of Trouble. In Great Perplexities, his Eye hath been my Guide, and his own Arm hath brought Salvation: it may be by the [Page 227]Ministry of his Holy Angels, obeying his Order, and giving unusual Intimations of very great, and otherwise unsuspected Dan­gers: or sending Relief and Deliverance, by such small, unlikely, and unexpected Means, as carried the Name of God visibly engraven on them. Innumerable Calami­ties he saves me from, which others groan under; and as many Blessings am I favour'd with, whereof they are destitute. He spreads my Table, and fills my Cup, and gives me All Things richly to enjoy, when many Excellent Persons, of whom the World is not worthy, are fed with the Bread of Affliction, and the Water of Affliction. O­thers have only Necessaries, or but few Conveniencies, in comparison with the Plentiful Provisions God hath made, for my Chearful Obedience to him. And shall I not Praise him for ^* the precious Things of Heaven, the blessings of the Earth, the Dew, and the Deep? and more especially for the God-will of Him who dwelt in the Bush, to sanctifie and sweeten all: Whereby Common Mercies become the Pledge and Fore-runner of bet­ter Things; as the fruit of his Special Kindness, the witness of his Truth, and the seed of Peace, and Joy, and Righteous­ness, and Praise; by reason of his Blessing on all that I possess, which otherwise would [Page 228]prove a Snare, and a Temptation, and be intermix'd with a Curse.

And besides the ordinary and continued Bounty of every Day, in the midst of how many Difficulties and Dangers have I felt the dear Obligations of his Preserving Mercy? abroad, and at home; in Foreign Countries, as well as my own; in the midst of Enemies, and among Friends; in all Places, and at all Times.

He hath prolonged my Health, or made my Bed in Sickness. He hath often granted the Desires of my Heart, whenever it was for his Glory; and contradicted my Wishes, and disappointed my Endeavours, in other Instances, when it was more to my Advan­tage. From how many Mischiefs hath he sav'd me, by such Things as I deprecated, and would have hinder'd? How many Evils hath he turn'd for Good? He hath heard my Cry in the day of Adversity, and set my feet in a large Place. He hath Chasten'd me for my Profit: His Rod and his Staff have comforted me: He hath spoken com­fortably to me in the Wilderness. Affliction hath been useful and necessary Physick; made an Instrument of Vertue, and so a Token of his Love. Therefore ^* I will sing of the Mer­cy of the Lord for ever, and with the voice of Thanksgiving will I make known his Faithfulness,

He hath all along conducted me by his Wisdom, guided me by his Providence, and the Angel of his Presence hath directed my Path, and order'd all my Goings. He hath been a Cloud to me by Day, and a Pillar of a Fire by Night: he hath helped me in my Straits, and supply'd my Wants, and comforted me in all my Sadnesses: His powerful and gracious Presence hath been my constant Guard; and his Sove­raign, Never-failing Goodness hath compast me about with Mercy on every side. For which, O most Merciful Father, my Soul, and all that is within me, desires to speak thy Praise.

The advantageous Circumstances of many divine Favours, do raise their value, and de­serve to be particularly observ'd and ac­knowledged. How suitably, how seasona­bly, how wisely hath he conferr'd his Be­nefits? with what Tenderness and Kind­ness? with what Freedom and Readiness? of his own Bounty and Good-will, without any Necessity, or Obligation on his Part; without any Desert, and sometimes with­out so much as a Prayer on mine. And what is more, notwithstanding my Ingrati­tude and Forgetfulness of Him, and great Provocations, heightned by the abuse of so much Mercy: demanding nothing, after all, in requital of so much Kindness, but [Page 230]my Acceptance of his Love, and grateful sense of his Goodness, and the sweetest and most reasonable Expressions of it, by Thankful Obedience.

More especially, would I bless the Lord, for enlightning my Mind in the Great My­steries of Religion: disposing in wonderful Wisdom the several Means and Methods, whereby he brought me to the knowledge of the Truth, by Parents, Ministers, Friends, Acquaintance, Books, Afflictions, &c. Be­ginning with me in Childhood, awakening and cultivating the inbred Notions of God, and Natural Religion, of Good and Evil, Rewards and Punishments; by the careful Instructions of Parents, or others con­cern'd in my Education: giving me the advantage of Good Examples, Counsels, and Encouragements, to know and do well; with more assistance, and less hin­drances, and diversions, than to many o­thers. Particularly, for the Excellent Pri­vilege, and Inestimable Blessing of his Holy Word and Sacraments; the liberty of the Christian Religion, in the Purity of it, in most of those Places, where God has been pleas'd to cast my Lot. Causing me to lay down in green Pastures, and leading me beside the still Waters: Instructing me in the Re­velation of his Will and Grace by Jesus Christ: acquainting me with the sublime [Page 231]Principles and Articles, Precepts and Rules, Promises and Hopes of the Gospel, in or­der to Eternal Life.

I bless Thee, O Lord, and shall for ever do so, that with any or all these Advan­tages and Helps, thy Holy Spirit hath taught me to know the Truth as it is in Jesus, hear­tily to believe and obey it. That by thy Grace I have been convinc'd of Sin, and brought to Repentance; shewing me the necessity of a Saviour, to make my peace with Thee, the All-sufficiency of his Grace, the Fulness of his Merit, the Freeness of his Love, and his readiness to receive me to Mercy, inviting and calling me to it, and enabling me to accept his gracious Invita­tion, and obey his compassionate Call; ma­king me willing, by a Powerful and Victorious Grace, drawing me with Cords of Love, and so effectually persuading me to con­sent to thy Covenant, and comply with thy Message, on the gracious Terms of the Go­spel. Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who, through his abundant Mercy, hath begotten me again to a lively Hope; having humbled my proud Heart, and con­quer'd the perverseness of my stubborn Will, and brought my Soul to an entire subjection to himself: who took pity on me, when he saw me in my Blood, spread his Skirt over me, cast a Mantle upon my [Page 232]Nakedness, wash'd me from my Sins, and put his own Comeliness upon me by San­ctification: who open'd my Eyes, when I was leaping blindfold into the Pit of De­struction: who healed my Soul, when I was sick unto death: who rescu'd and re­cover'd me from the Slavery of the Devil, when I was led Captive by him at his will. Shall not a ransom'd, redeemed Slave, be thankful to his Deliverer? Shall not a mi­serable, undone Sinner, who is received to Mercy, be thankful for a Pardon? Awake, O my Soul! and utter a Song of Praise to him, ^* who forgiveth all thine Iniquities, and healeth all thy Diseases; who redeemeth thy Life (thy Soul) from Destruction, and crowneth thee with Loving-kindness, and tender Mercies.

Hath he made thee Partaker of his own renewed Image and Likeness? given thee his Son? his Grace? his Spirit? and taken such a wretched Creature into so near a re­lation to Himself; and promised to be thy God and Guide, thy Portion, and thine Inheritance, thy Friend and thy Physician, thy Sun and thy Shield, and thine exceed­ing great Reward? and shall not my Soul speak aloud his Praise? Hath he been ^† merciful to my unrighteousness, and blotted out my sins? Hath he gathered me with his Arm, and carried me in his Bosom? Hath he [Page 233]been my Saviour and Redeemer, adopted me into his Family, and promis'd to make me Blessed in his Glory, with the Holy An­gels? the Curse being removed, and the Hand-writing against me cancell'd, the Price paid, the Breach made up, the Mouth of Justice stopt, and the condemning Sen­tence of the Law exchang'd for a gracious Pardon, through the Sacrifice of my Blessed Lord Jesus? and shall I not praise his In­comprehensible Love and Grace?

I likewise thank thee, most Holy Father, for saving me from Guilt, and Ruine, when as­saulted by powerful, and dangerous Tempta­tions; that by Preventing Mercy, or Re­straining Grace, thou hast kept me from ma­ny scandalous and presumptuous Crimes. I thank Thee, for making the Sins of Others a Warning and a Caution to Me; an Argu­ment to Humility, and a Motive to Watch­fulness; for preserving my Judgment from many Errors and Delusions, by which others are seduced; for enabling me to improve any Opportunities of doing Good, and making me in any thing useful to Others: yea, I thank thee for all thy Mercies to other Christians; for all the Gifts, and Graces, and usefulness of any of thy Servants, wherein, as a Mem­ber of the same Body, I desire to rejoyce; for any Support and Comfort to me, or any of them, under honourable Sufferings for thy Name's sake.

I desire unfeignedly to bless Thee, for any Succour, Relief, and Victory, with re­spect to the Snares and Buffetings of Satan, and the vilest of his Temptations. When he hath tempted me to Apostacy, and Infide­lity, in Speculation, or Practice; to question the Truth of the Holy Scriptures, and the Life to come; to doubt of the Foundations of the Christian Faith, or to despair of the Mercy of God, and give up the Reins to sensual Lusts; or to draw me from God, by the love of the World, and the praise of Men, by Evil Company, Intemperance, secret Wickedness, &c.

I bless Thee with my whole Soul, for cal­ling me back from any of my Wandrings, and by Infinite Goodness recovering me after great Falls, enabling me to return when I had gone astray, and seek thy forfeited fa­vour, that thou may'st heal my Backslidings; giving me, in order to it, a deep sense of my own Sin, and of thy Soveraign Grace; lead­ing me to a Saviour, whose Blood cleanseth from all sin, when my guilty, defiled Soul so much needed its pardoning, and cleansing Vertue; awakening me to make holy Vows, and calling upon me by thy Word, and Spi­rit, and Providence, to perform them.

I bless Thee, who hast guided my feet in­to the way of Peace, when by the Terrors of an accusing Conscience, and the sense of unpar­don'd [Page 235]Sin, and the Apprehensions of thy deserved Wrath, I was ready to Despair: that tho' thou didst most justly hide thy Face at any time, it was but for a little while; but didst seasonably, and in Mercy return, to wipe off my Tears, restore the Joy of thy Sal­vation, and chace away the clouds and dark­ness on my Spirit, by the reviving Presence of thy own. Thou, who art the Author, wilt be the Finisher of my Faith; and therefore, tho' thou hast visited mine Iniquities with a Fatherly Rod, yet thy loving-kindness thou hast not taken from me, or suffered thy faithfulness to fail, or thy Covenant of Peace to be removed; but hast refreshed me with hidden Manna, after great Perplexities, saying unto my Soul, I am God, even thy God. Thou hast made me to hear thy Voice, which was sweet; and to taste thy Love, which is better than Wine: enabling me to say with thine Apostle Thomas, My Lord, and my God; and to have had some Communion with Thee since, in publick or private Duties.

For all these Innumerable Mercies I desire to praise Thee, which yet are but in order to greater; I hope, in order to Everlasting Kindness in Heaven. These are but the Taste, and Earnest of what thou wilt bestow here­after. Oh, how great is his Goodness, that he hath laid up for those that fear him? And now, Lord, what wait I for? my hope is even in Thee. I [Page 236]thank thee, who hast thus put it into my Heart, to render thee solemn Praise, and once more to renew my Covenant with Thee.

I will magnifie the Lord, and my Spirit shall rejoyce in God my Saviour. Return unto thy rest, O my Soul, for the Lord hath dealt boun­tifully with me.^(a)While I live, I will praise thee, and sing Praises unto my God, while I have a Being. O come, and behold the Works of the Lord, what he hath done for my Soul! The Lord liveth; ^(b)Blessed be my Rock, and let the God of my Salvation be exalted. Let my Heart be glad, and my Glory rejoyce, for the Lord is not asham'd to be called my God. Thanks be to God, who hath caused me to triumph in Christ Jesus. Sing unto the Lord, O ye his Saints, and give thanks at the remembrance of his Holiness! ^(c)I cried unto Thee, and thou hast healed, and sav'd me: I will give thanks to Thee for ever. ^(d)I will shew forth thy loving-kindness in the morning, and thy faithfulness every night. For the Lord is Good, his Mercy is Everlasting, and his Truth endures throughout all Genera­tions. O enter into his Gates with Thanksgiving, and his Courts with Praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his Name. Bless the Lord, all ye his Works, in all-places of his Dominions: Bless the Lord, O my Soul.

Let me add, for a Conclusion, That the particular Deliverances, Supports, and Con­solations, which at any time God hath given in Cases of great Exigence, or in answer to importunate Prayer, ought never to be for­gotten. Many experienc'd Christians have been wont to write down such remarkable Appearances of God for them, with the par­ticular Circumstances, that did recommend, and enhance the Mercy, (whether Spiritual or Temporal) as an Encouragement to trust in God in future Difficulties. And have afterwards found the Comfort and Advan­tage, of being able to have recourse to such Papers. This Practice I recommend, as what hath been useful and consolatory to divers Christians, for many years afterwards; and to some others, of their more intimate Friends, to whom they might, without va­nity, be imparted. What Experiences might be recorded, of signal Returns to Prayer, and seasonable Manifestations of the Truth, and Goodness, and Wisdom of God, if all the Instances thereof were duly recollected and preserv'd! And how sweet, and plea­sant would the Work of Prayer and Praise then be! With what rejoycing, and delight should we set about it, and live in it, if the constraining Goodness and Love of God, and a thankful Sense of his unspeakable Mer­cies, did bring us to him, and indict and ani­mate [Page 238]every word! What Support, and Com­fort, and probable Hopes (at least) of the spe­cial Love of God, might we derive, from the various Passages of his Compassion and Kind­ness! And hereby we may be able, more heartily to give him Thanks, for Pardon, San­ctification, and Adoption, which we commonly mention with too much doubt and fear.

It may likewise be Advisable, To examine, and record the Workings of your own Spirit, under such Dispensations: What Thoughts you then had of God? What Acts of Faith, Love, and Thankfulness, you did then mani­fest? What Evidences of God's Favour, and what discovery of your own Sincerity, you have had at such times? When, and how, and by what means you were cur'd of your un­comfortable Unbelief, and rais'd from your Despondency? What Promises you had re­course to, for relief? What Considerations were most helpful to you? What frame of Spirit you kept up in Prayer, before and af­ter? What Resolutions and Engagements you made to God; to love, and trust, and praise, and serve him, and give up All to his dispose for the future? And what con­sequent Obligation may be inferr'd from thence, to acquiesce in the Will of God, and resign our selves entirely to Him, saying, This God is our God for ever and ever, and He will be our Guide unto Death.