Female Excellence: OR, WOMAN Display'd, IN SEVERAL Satyrick Poems. BY A Person of Quality.
[...]. Theophrast.
LONDON, Printed for Norman Nelson at Grays-Inn Gate in Holbourn. 1679.
A General Satyr on Woman,
WOMAN! Thou damn'd hyperbole in Sin,
Malign Atropos, Hell and Woes origin.
Man, who at first was made in perfect bliss,
Was by thy guilt depriv'd of happiness;
Whose Soul was so divine, that twas essay'd
Its Author's Image, was by thee betray'd-
God did thy Will to but one Law confine,
Yet thy immeasur'd Lust turn'd Libertine.
Hells subtle Serpent did her mind perceive,
Saw she was fair, and knew she would deceive;
The Devil and She, alas! too well did know
The surest way, to work Man's overthrow;
Such subtle arts and means they did contrive,
That Man could not avoid, pass by, and live.
Could neither Grace nor Law thy Lust dispell,
Woman! thou damn'd Confederate with Hell?
She Proteus like in any shape is seen;
Of th' blackest Crimes she has the Actress been:
The purest Age hath sad Examples store
Of her base deeds, besmear'd with blood and gore.
Did'st thou deceive, and shall not Man take heed?
Thou did'st with Hell damnation breed.
Abortive Sin from thee its rise doth date:
To be damn'd is to be effeminate.
Envy and Malice from thy Fall did grow,
Murder and Homicide to thee do owe
Their birth, Treason and Rebellion call
Thee Mother; Thy Venom's epidemical:
Witchcraft and Sorcery from thee did come,
And mansions claim within thy womb;
Idolatry, and Schism, and Heresie,
Swearing, and Lying, and Hypocrisie;
Horrid Execrations, and Blasphemy,
Fornication, and Adultery.
Avarice, Concupiscence, and Gluttony;
From thee derive their monstrous progenie;
Thou base Common Sewer of Iniquitie.
These, and their sev'ral Species, are
Fre [...]uent in Women, and unpractisd rare:
[Page 4]Alas, by sad experience do we find,
They are the impious Tenents of her mind.
Nothing that's good doth in her body dwell;
Lewd Woman is the Enthymem of Hell.
Legions of damn'd Souls in Torment cry,
Damnation came by thy Apostacy.
Dire Warrs and Plagues hath Justice now design'd,
Famines and Earth-quakes to torment Mankind.
Yet Woman by her retransacted Ill,
New Plagues doth coin, and bring new Curses still:
But of all th'Plagues, with which poor Man was curst,
His enforc'd Love of Woman is the worst.
Her crooked mind's a Metaphor of Hell,
Her Tongue's an Engine which doth horror tell:
Her perverse Will doth for her Reason stand,
Her mad Passion does her Will command.
Her Prudence by her fancy moves apace,
Fraud and Deceit, are in her painted face.
All moral Virtues from ill habits have,
In her several Lusts, a sev'ral grave.
Woman! depicted thus! with these damn'd parts!
Yet still she'll conjure and comptroul our hearts!
Thus stands she blazon'd, in this Scheme you see
The Fairest Beauties, hang in Effigie.
Divorce thy thoughts now Man from Female Love;
This curse obtaind, thy cursed Fate will move;
May Wedlock be forgot, Let Woman die
A Victim to her own Virginitie.
A Satyr upon Woman's Vsurpation.
WOman was made Man's Soveraignty to own;
Man, as the Monarch, was to rule alone.
She created was a Slave, and made to dread
The angry frowns of Man, her Lord and Head.
Heaven did to him his Power delegate;
O're all the Universe he made him great:
His Power did the largest Scepter sway,
The whole Creation did his Laws obey;
No limits there were set to his commands,
Tygers and Lyons lick'd his sacred hands,
And Salvage Monsters wore his mighty bands.
Distributive Justice God was pleas'd to see
Him give, sans bribe or partiality:
The Legislative Power was solely in
Just Man, till Woman tempted him to sin:
Though she did know Eternal death stood by,
Resolv'd she was to tast, transgress, and dye.
[Page 5]Once she was happy, but her towring pride
Could no Superiour, God or Man abide:
Man's now enslav'd, imperious Woman reigns,
And governs Monarchs with her golden chains:
She is so prone by nature to comptroul,
That she must govern, or destroy man's Soul.
She will no longer in subjection stand,
Nor will obey Iehovah's great Command,
Man must resolve to stoop to her demand.
The Sun no sooner had begun its course,
And spread its candid beams o're th' Universe,
Nature her self was hardly full awake,
The Planets did their motions rarely make;
The azure Orbs, in which there's finely set
The glistering Stars, scarce knew their Architect,
The Earth, Air, Water and Fire did hardly find
Themselves pure Elements, and were inclin'd
To mix, in composition of each kind;
Man scarce had been the first resplendent light,
E're Woman brought forth everlasting night.
Her damned Pride first taught her how to Sin,
Ambition then the Devil usher'd in;
Those for ten thousand more have inlets made,
And now she's Mistriss of the Devil's trade;
She'll tempt, betray, lye, swear, cousen and cheat,
Hell's blackest arts, ten thousand times repeat.
So hard's the Fate of miserable Man,
That he shall be destroy'd, if Woman can:
Heaven's diviner charms, cannot compose
Her swelling thoughts, ambition knows no Laws:
Toss'd with impetuous storms of haughty Pride,
Disorder'd motives will her passions guide,
Till she destroy her loving Lord and Bride.
She, with domestick storms of civil hate,
Disturbs the solitude of Man's estate:
Eternal Wars she'll make, no peace permit,
Till she command, and all Mankind submit:
Such was th' effects of her aspiring Mind,
She damn'd the race and stock of brave Mankind.
Base silly Cupid, that art so fondly wise,
Let Woman rule thee with her sparkling Eyes;
Base Wretch, that for th' Effects of Lust will sell
Thy birth-right, thy power; thy Heaven for Hell!
My Soul's too great, and can no bondage bear;
My Will's too free, and cannot fetters wear.
Woman!
Since Heaven's Sacred Laws, cannot restrain
Thy Will, and threaten'd Vengeance is in vain;
Since to live peaceful is thy greatest pain,
Proceed, and thou shalt Queen of Devils reign.
A Satyr on Woman's Lust.
HOt Lust within her reigns in every part;
The foulest Sins possess her filthy heart:
Incest, and the many Sins of Sodom, are
Dull satisfaction to the lustful Fair:
T'attain her ends she Mountains would remove;
And knows no bliss but in lascivious love.
She'll travel all the foulest Roads of Hell,
Commit such Vice as ne're knew parallel:
Till she enjoyes, no rest shall close her eyes;
Enjoyment is her only Paradise.
Missing her man, some ugly mungril must
Give satisfaction, to her raging lust:
Her appetite's so strong, that to fulfill
Her damn'd desires, she'll try Infernals skill:
No monstrous object can deter her mind;
She'l use a Dog or Devil for Mankind.
But if in all her Lust prevention find,
'Twill gnaw, and eat her own distracted mind;
Burst into Envy, and ten thousand more
Such monstrous Sins, as Hell n'ere knew before:
Hell! Hell's no abyss if compar'd to this,
'Tis Woman's Lust is only bottomless.
Her Lust deny'd! she'll rend the Earth and Skies,
And thunder forth most horrid blasphemies;
She'll roar, and cry, and scratch, she'll howl and tear,
Like Devils who the greatest torments wear.
Thus burning Lust doth set her Soul on fire,
Which will for ever flame with hot desire:
Life will with Lust together both expire,
And will accompany her Soul to Hell,
And there with lustful Demons ever dwell;
Then her enjoyments will eternal prove,
Where Pluto takes her for his hellish Love.
In Praise of a Deformed, but Virtuous Lady; OR, A Satyr on Beauty.
FIne Shape, good Features, and a handsom Face;
Such do the glory of the Mind deface;
But Virtue is the best and only grace.
Venus Man's mind enslames with lustful fires,
Consumes his Reason and burns his best Desires.
Wer't thou my Soul but from my body free,
Had flesh and blood no influence on thee,
Then would'st thou love a Woman, and would'st choose
The Soul, fair she, to be thy blessed Spouse.
Beauty's corrupt, and like a Flower stands
To be collected by impure hands.
'Tis hard as 'tis impossible to find,
Virtue and Venus both together joyn'd.
For the Fair She, who knows the force and strength
Of Beauty's charms, grows proud; and then at length
Lust and ambition will possess her breast,
Which always will disturb man's peaceful rest.
She will adore her self, and disesteem
All others that in truth more comely seem:
She thinks besides she is ador'd by all,
And that Mankind must at her footstool fall;
And thus is Beauty prejudicial.
Beware my Soul, lest she ensnare thy Sence,
Against her Wiles let Virtue be thy fence.
Some please their fancies with a Picture well,
And for meer toys do real Pleasures sell.
Some shadows love, beyond substantial things:
Such faults are sometimes seen in Sacred Kings.
Fancy's a microscope which cheats the Eye,
Who looks through that, their Judgments falsify.
No bliss fond Cupid thinks, but what is in
The smoothing, of his Ladie's tender skin;
Her snowy breasts, her sparkling sable eyes,
Her charming looks, her blooming cheeks surprise;
Her ebony brows, her bright forehead high,
Her soft belly, and her ivory thigh,
In these his best and chiefest Pleasures lye.
What other parts she can for pleasures show,
You can produce as well as she, I know.
[Page 8]When age with furrows shall have plow'd her face,
And all her body o're, thick wrinkles place,
Her breasts turn black, her sparkling eyes sink in,
Fearful to see the bristles on her chin,
Her painted face grown swarthy, wan and thin,
Her hands all shrievled o're, her nails of length
Enough to digg her grave, had she but strength.
Such is the Mistriss that blind Poets praise,
Such foolish theams their groveling fancys raise:
My Mistriss is more lovely, and more fair,
Graces divine in her more brighter are;
She is the source of bliss, whil'st Virtue reigns
In her, all things impure her Soul disdains.
Those fools ne're knew pure Love's most sacred arts,
That e're were conquer'd by blind Cupids darts,
Or stand as Slaves to their own carnal hearts.
Madam,
'Tis the preheminence that's seen in you,
Which does with sacred love my heart subdue,
Your gentle nature, and your modest meen,
Your passions conquer'd, and your looks serene,
Your conversation mild; these sacred charms,
Protection are 'gainst lusts impurer harms;
These and your other Virtues do excell,
And matchless seem to want a Paralell.
In your most sacred presence none can think
Of Lust, or once its horrid venom drink:
You are an Object that will soon dispell
Lust's most delightful Poisons sent from Hell.
Your self's the substance of the Saints above,
You move my Soul with chast and holy love;
For you alone large offerings I design,
And with continual prayers wish you mine;
Oh! that Omnipotence would bounty shew,
And make me happy in contracting you.
FINIS.