Characters & Letters, &c.
A Character of Honour.
Honour is one of the grand Impostures of the Earth; through whose false Splendour, unadvised Ambition is, as it were, Trepan'd out of its Life, Liberty, &c. No Folly transcending theirs, esteeme themselves onely Happy in a vaine Title, or Syllable; at the beginning pronounced by the Prince, and after reverberated by the Meager, empty, and hollow Eccho, of the insignificant Rabble; no lesse ready, upon the Change of [Page 120] Fortune, to Murther, then Father, all Markes of Desert; to those very Particular ones, their own Indulgence had informed. Opinion being for the most part printed in such blind Ink, as it hardly remaines legible, to the Second Generation. The Merit of the first Proprietor becomming mortify'd by Oblivion, or quite dissipated, and lost in the Wilder Fields of a no lesse Numerous, then Vitious Posterity. So remote from improving any Talents left them by their Ancestours, as like the improvident Usurer in the Gospel, they do not only expose them to Rust, and Cankers, but waste the Estate, with all other glorious Endowments in which they were wrapped.
The Promoter of their Family, becomming by this meanes, an Occasion of the Ruine of it. It lying in the Nature, no lesse then the Custom [Page 121] of Honour, to put as unreasonable an Excize on the Vices, as the Vertues of its Owners. I never thought it Prudence, or Discretion, to articulate over-severely on the worst of Modes I have had the Good, or Ill Fortune to be Born and Bred under; yet it seemes to Crosse the Grayn of Wisdom, if not of Candid Charity, to arraign as guilty of Absurdity, all we finde in ordinary Practise abroad, though on the other side the Pale of Christianity. And for a particular instance; That, used amongst the Turks: where no Title but what belongs to the Emperour, is made Hereditary.
‘Honour being hardly managable within the Compasse of Decency, by any are not perfect in the Steps that lead to it.’ Splendid Epithets, where there resides no reall Ability in the Party to deserve them, Cheating the Beholders, by an Expectation of [Page 122] more Vertue, and the Possessour with lesse, then his Parasites (a Vermine Capitall Fortunes are infested withall) may have possibly insinuated into his formerly suborned imagination. But to descend to a more exact Definition of Honour: It is a meere Ray or Beame darted from the Favour of a Prince, who in one body contains the Abstract of all Delated Dignities. And the Reward of every Desert is either Reall, or by him supposed, in the Nature or Actions of those he thinks fit to advance: Amongst which none are more glorious, then they in Turky; where Worth is alwayes found the Antecedent to every Reward. Those in Christendom, that relate wholly to the Passions, and Affections of the Donor, not appearing. so Naturall, but further remote from the purer and unsophisticated Elements of Majesty, then what is found inherent in [Page 123] the Party. The true Cause of Advancement amongst us, being, commonly so triviall, and foule, as for Shame, they forbore to recite it in their Patent. From whence, some may Conclude, those Disparities amongst Men proceeded at first, like Hills and Dales, from the Deluge of Pride, So long, a Succession of Government, hath powred upon the Face of the Earth. Courts by such Canting Termes advancing their particular interest; which would be abated, were the Devourers, in an equall Parallel with those they feed on. The Rabble, for want of a more elated Prudence, imagining their Governours to proceed, like the Gyants of old, from some Diviner Extraction then their Own. Not wise enough to apprehend, That Honour hath no advantage, really, in it Selfe, but what it is able to deduce from the Lower Condition, and basencsse of [Page 124] Others. All Titles, to Those relating to God Himself, as they were absent, before the Creation; So Reason informs us, they could not be Present now, were there no Creatures, endued with so much understanding, as to be able to pronounce them. The most relucent Honour being Offuscated, and blinded in the Shades of Solitude. Wherefore, if it had a Name, it wanted an Owner, till something was made willing to promote it. No Age, ever represented it more Naked to the World, then This we live in. Whereas the Jewes do in Italy, by the Ancient Roman Coynes, So, the Grave Visages of 25 Bishops have been struck off, and put upon many Thousand Presbyterians; whereupon the Image, and Superscription of the Primitive Church, is quite defaced, and Obliterated, through the Impresse they are exchanged for: which ownes no [Page 125] worth, but from the Gravity of the First. Being it self, of no greater Antiquity, then John Calvin, who did not but with some Difficulty as Boyes do Giggs, whip this Younger Government out of a Word, taught for many Ages to signifie Episcopacy onely; making it currant in Geneva. Now, if it be no lesse frequent in the Practise of Men, then in the Dialect of the Scriptures, to rob God of his Honour; why should any, but meerly Mortall, place Stability in it? Especially, since the Trash these Earthly Tumours swell withall, is by the Basest of, &c. render'd so perspicuous.
Valour and Cowardice.
I Should much wonder how Valour and Cowardice, both strangers, if not Contrary to the Practice of [Page 126] undistracted Nature, could passe so long without the Errata, in the Place-Book of virtue and vice: But that I finde it, The Design of Policy, to advance, or abate the Credit of all things found Useful or Destructive to her own, or the Generall utility: And, where she can bring in the least Colour for it to paint, what is necessary to Commerce, with the gratefull Approbation of Religion; And to render the Contrary in the Dark Sense, and Black Characters of Hell. Allowing all Supports as Decent and quadrating with the Beauty of Holiness, though Above or Against the Lights of Reason, if found, any way requisite, to sustain Government. Of such force is Custom, that it is able, through the Assistance of Credulity, to stifle, and trample upon the Senses themselves.
Now, though it may be no Indiscretion [Page 127] in a Patient, to suffer himself for his Recovery, to be deluded by his Physitian; yet out of a Panique Fear, or effeminate Nicety, to swallow more Drugs, and in greater Quantities then is unavoydably necessary, may appear a Madnesse, arising from the more Dreadfull, then Dangerous Phantasmes mustered up by the Fumes of a formerly-suborned Melancholy; rather then the Substantiall Dictates af an unsophisticated Judgement, which a Wise man may retain, and feast himself with, though for Manners sake, and to avoyd the Danger, no lesse then Shame, impending Singularity, he may seem to own the most universall Opinion.
Now to shew, how Policy, no less then Religion, imposeth upon frail Humanity, in both the Fore-mentioned Particulars (Though to the apprehension of Sense, absolutely repugnant [Page 128] one to the other) they are scituated as near Damnation, that appear Overdaring in the prosecution of private Revenge; as such who out of Remissenesse, and Fear, betray The Cause of their Country; in Defence of which, is placed, under all Professions extant, the Highest step of our Duty to God and our Neighbour. Which cannot be denyed to stand further remote in Nature, then what really Concerns Our selves: found recorded in Job, by the Divell; a far Ancienter Philosopher then the somuch-venerated Aristotle. From whence we may Conclude, ‘That Resolution and Dread instituted by Nature at first, for the Vindication and safety of every respective Individuall, are since Tyranny and Propriety have forced us into Communalties, reduced by Common Consent of Law, and Conveniency into a Publiaue stock, for the Preservation of [Page 129] All. So as we are suffered, to own no more in reference to our selves, then Prudence is able to filtch out of the Treasury of the State:’ and that upon no slighter a Penalty, then Law doth inflict; Which found too dim-sighted to penetrate further, then Externall Evidence can reach; Religion, whose Results (and those no weak ones) lye in Conscience, supplyes the place of a Diviner-Guard; Brandishing like the Angell in Paradise, the flaming sword of Hell: Which operates more or less, upon the Affections, proportionall to the Tincture, received from Education. Not seldom Proof (as we find in Hereticks) against the Dictates of Reason her Self; Nothing being harder to be lost, or Convinced of Falshood then Opinions sucked in with the Nourses Milk. And this may raise an Use of Caution, in relation to what we call Pusillanimity, and Valour. [Page 130] Which in a Naturall and primitive sense, signifie onely Evasion. And where that will not serve in order to our own Preservation, a vigorous and stout Resistance to the losse of Life it Self, as is manifest in every Creature, in the absence of hope; and therefore impossible to be found Wanting, in the pure and unsuborned Nature of Man. And so in the primitive Construction uncapable of any Forreigner Interpretation, then what is deduceable from our own judgement, without reference to Fame, or Reward. Termes unintelligible, during the Originall Felicity: And before the Thirst after Generation had swelled the World, into such an Ocean of Inhabitants, as could not be Kept within the Compass of Moderation, but by Mounds and Bancks; in the making of which all things are imployed that own the power to Terrifie or Flatter [Page 131] the Rabble into Obedience, without bearing any Nicer Respect, to single Individualls, then through Evading, or Over-ruling the Law, Power or Prudence is able to purchase to themselves, by Mastering, Flattering, or Contemning publick Fame. After which, it may be sometimes less policy to run, then not to be too greedy, to give it welcom when it courts us: Opinion being a Bird oftner catcht by Chance, then Endeavour. Nor shall any one that carryes her on his First, ever want Envy, or Scratching by Others. And he that hath but the Patience, to attend Good or bad Report to the end of the race, shall observe them like Cocks to change their Oddes: one unlucky Blow being able to depresse more, and draw a greater Concourse of Abettors to the Other side, then Twenty as strong and probable endeavours, without Successe can possibly advance. Or, [Page 132] if this fail, the Gamesters together with what they strove for, will by the hand of Time, be laid in Oblivion. Whereas the reall Wounds, and sensible Inconveniencies accruing ftom a too Serious Attention, and exact Observance of the Various Cadences of the Trumpet of Fame, subject to be put out of Tune, by the Change of every Blast, do not onely exceed the Cure of the Chierurgeon, but all endeavours to that of Wisdom it Self. Nor hath Policy any cheaper Trash to load the opposite Scale withall, then Honour and Titles; which like Horse-Bells, onely affect the Eare, as Diamonds do the Eyes; encreasing, rather then lessening the Burthen of Life: which, with its Concomitance Envy, Danger, and Jealousie signifies nothing, proportionable at least, to what the Purchase requires; Seldom enjoy'd of the Owner long, without Controversie; [Page 133] unlesse by dying in Possession he cuts off all contrary Claims. Wherefore such as have the Dexterity, to passe their Dayes, at the least Expence of Trouble and Conveniency, may be truely said, to husband Discretion best. Nor are they likely to be misled, in such a vast number of Fooles and Madmen, as are daily observ'd, to Sacrifice their own Ease and Content to promote the Ambition and Small Plots of Others: Grounding their Hopes upon those, that have no Assurance Themselves. But this runs so contrary to the grain of Practice, as it may not unpossibly, set such Teeth on Edge, as are able through Detraction, or Power, to blast the Authour of this Advice.
A Letter writ to disswade Mr. — from a Duell.
I Shall, at this time, conceal, what I apprehend of your Quarrell, and the Circumstances that did at first produce it: Lest I should fall into a Physitians indiscretion, who comming to one labouring of a Fever, did consume the time, In telling the Patient, The Causes of his Distemper were Drink and Evill Company: which though possibly true, could not but carry the Figure of a Meager Impertinency, before the party had his Cure; since no place is now Left for prevention. And as Physick is opposed to the Defects incident to bad Dyet, and Disorder: So Counsell hath been observed, to Moderate, and palliate, though not Cure those of Indiscretion; arising [Page 135] for the most part from an Inexperience in the exact knowledge of our own Fame, no lesse then that of Others; And where it may be, or is Scituated, with the smallest prejudice to Conscience, or giving the least interruption to the Prospect of Selfpreservation, the First Result in the Intention of Nature, and left as of greatest Intendment, to the Care of Prudence. From whence I have been taught, that it is possible, for Physick to be welcome, though Distastefull; but that Counsell seldom meets any more favourable Construction then Scorn, from the Receiver; & an Opinion of Presumption in Him that Ventures to give it; especially, if it meets not with a candid Nature: Which hoping to find in You, I shall so much transgresse the voyce of Discretion, as to suffer my Self in Love to become an Arbitrator, between the Honour and prudence of a [Page 136] Friend, so far, as to maintain, That Such as animate you to a Formall Revenge, do out of Forgetfulnesse, or Want of Religion, forbear to Calculate the Danger, no lesse then Impiety, that for ever Cleaves to such hands, as are found once polluted in Blood: And, That those violate the Dictates of Piety and Discretion, (by Wisdome esteemed the most Considerable part of Manhood) that Contradict it. For to use their own canting, (no where to be found in the Dialect of Antiquity) He hath given you an Affront; and such an one, as may not decently be passedby, without a Formall Satisfaction; which is but the single and wild Opinion of some under-graduates in the Arts of Living. Yet, admit it a Debt, due in the Court of Honour, may it not as well be discharged by your Friend or Servant, as Your self? Parties lesse agitated by Interest [Page 137] and Passion, and therefore the likelyer, to deal a Revenge so evenly, as He shall have as little cause to bragge as You to repent. A thing you can never promise your Self, if contrary to the Injunctions of God and the Examples of the most prudent people you proportion out your Satisfaction in the Field. Where you cannot but deliver into the Custody of Blind Fortune, not onely your Life but Estate: As justly belonging to posterity, as ever your Ancestours made it yours. Which by this Mad-Knight-Errantry you hazard to Undo. I am sure all Wise minds will quadrate with this. And if the Fools of the present Age, pretend to any Discoveries of Wayes to Honour, New and Untrod, by the Ancients, Let'um follow them, to the furthest Extent of their Lives or Lunacy. Whilest you hearken, to the Graver Advice of reason. Which [Page 138] may informe you, He hath offer'd an Abuse already, and will you hazard upon equall Terms the receiving a Greater? Indeed if a Requitall had been endeavoured at the Instant it might have rendred you more excusable before God and Man: But that opportunity omitted; it were more Wrong to your Charity, then Vindication of Valour, in cold Blood to call back Revenge: As if a Worse Christian upon Meditation, then when irritated by Fury and Passion. Neither is Honour to be purchased, in Single and self-perswading Combates, because no Marks of them appear in Antiquity; where many are found Dead, but not one, to my remembrance, upon so impertinent a Quarrell, as Words. Yet we may conclude from the foul Expressions in Oratours, That the Mouthes of the Gentry were then none of the Cleanest. He that Consults former [Page 139] Histories, may find, That some have gained more repute from a Retreat, then others could obtain by a Won-Field. And what is a Retreat, I pray you, but a Fine Word for Running away? Fiercenesse being proper to Beasts, whereas a Neat Evasion belongs peculiarly to Men. Of which, I shall instance this, as now fresh in my Memory. A Gentleman lying, like you, under the repute of an Injury, did meet his Enemy, and shot him with a Pistoll stopped full of Dung, whereupon he cryed He was slayn, which set him further back in the Opinion of the World, then his former Vapouring had advanced him, when the Excrement the Dagge was loaden with, appeared to the Senses of the Standers-by. And for this, the Wit of it's Deviser was highly commended. Another return'd this Answer, with a like Successe, to a Younger Brothers Challenge; [Page 140] That if he could prove his Losse as great as His, should he Kill or be Killed, he would gladly accept it; Otherwise he did not think it reason, to venture his Life, against one did want Necessaries, and so might seek Death, no lesse out of Discontent, then Gallantry: which Himself, that wanted nothing, had no cause to do. All that remaines is but your Pardon for this Boldnesse, which I most seriously Desire. Remaining in the mean time, no lesse Your Faithfull Friend, Then,
A Letter to Mr. — in hope to disswade Him from going a Colonel under Count Mansfield.
I Cannot but own it, for a high Presumption, to offer such suddain and crude Conceptions in a Businesse where I presume, you have employed, not only your Owne, but the most Serious Advice of Your Friends. To the Abilities and Dignity of whom, though I am forced to give place, I may not justly be accounted behind them in Affection to your Selfe, or Affaires. Wherefore having received so great an encouragement from your Commands, no lesse then a Stimulation from my particular Desire to Serve you, I shall according to my small Experience, and the meaner Abilities [Page 142] I have found in me, to employ it to the best Labour, to inform You, These Corrupt times have rendred many things Necessary to the German Warres, are no wayes suteable to your Complexion, or Fortune, which your Generall, being a Stranger, cannot in probability, advance, without Offending his own, and sinning against an Article of Policy, and Nature. Nor shall you, though loaden with the Highest Merit, render your Return more gratefull to Your Naturall Prince: King James having alwayes numbered Souldiers amongst those, he esteemes the worst of Men, and most formidable to His Person. The Expedition being by Him rather Connived at, then Approved, out of Hope, by this meanes, to facilitate the two Treaties of a Match with Spain, and the Restitution of the Pallatinate: which obtained, (according to the Mode of [Page 143] Pusillanimous Princes) all endeavours will be used to discharge the State of You and Your Companions, as a Society most superfluous during Peace; the only Thing Our King doth study to promote: To whose Eares a Drum is more terrible then Thunder, and the Report of a Canon then the voyce of God Himselfe. Which, (if Our Church-Men may be credited) doth at this Day cry for vengeance, against the Cruelty, exercised upon Christians; especially from England, by an unanimous Consent chosen the Head of the Protestant League, till his Majesty had forfeited that Honour to the brisker Assistance given by the French. Now, can you think he should indulge valour as a vertue in another, when nothing is more manifest, then that he labours to expunge all Marks, or Occasions for it in Himselfe, or any about Him so [Page 144] farre, as to Answer my Lo. — when he came from the Warres, and desired to Kisse his Hand, That he feared he would bite it, and therefore bad he should be muffled? Nor is it our Kings mode alone, (that never made use of Souldiers unlesse to slight them) But that of Spaigne; under whom the most deserving have dyed in Disgrace, if not by Poyson. And amongst the Catalogue of Those stand written with great Characters in the Kalender of Fame, few or none, are registred for Saints, or Happy. It being past Controversie, That, no Warre can be called Just, beares not a reall Tincture of Defensative. And whosoever hath, or shall have enterprized the Contrary, though his Name be never so richly enamelled on the Ring of Fortune, and Himself placed at the Top of her Wheele, yet he is but the Scourge of God: and doth for the [Page 145] most part, fall, when he thinks himselfe most capable of standing. Like Charles the 5th, that was by the Duke of Saxony, (a Family of his own raysing) beaten over the Alps, by Torch-light, and himself like the Sword of Goliah, wound up into a High Contempt of this World, and layd in a Monastery. The Sins and Oversights of Gods Children are severely punished. But it is as true, That nothing costs dearer, then the Bloud of his Saints. As may appear by such Horse-Leaches, as have been applyed to his Church; from whence a double quantity hath been drawn, by some unexpected meanes. But if these Reasons savour too much of Theology, Consider how unpossible it is to do any thing, without the Love of the Common Souldier abroad, and how unsafe He must needes be at home that enjoyes it; There being nothing more usuall [Page 146] with Princes, then to be jealous of their Liberators. Manifest in Byron; who, after he had set the Crown upon Henry the fourths head, lost his own, out of a no more pious reason, then that upon a Contrary provocation, he might have removed it to another. And to shew of what vile esteeme Souldiers are in the dayes of Peace; I will not say (though I have heard it) that the Judges, after the Irish Warres, were given it in Charge: yet can assure you, they hanged Souldiers for Faults, which, Others (thought of more use in Peace) did scape, or obtained pardon for. If so unhappy, as to receive a Wound in your Person or Credit, it remains Yours, without the least Diminution. If Honour, Custome shares it between your Country, and He that Commands in Chiefe. Who, being a Forreyner, is not unlikely to rob you of your due; or by imploying [Page 147] you on Desperate Service, to Conclude Fame and your Life together. I know, your Resolution is too well lyned by Philosophy against the Storms of Danger, to admit a Parly with any Force but that of Reason: wherefore I forbear to Paynt them, lest I should seem to scare you with Feares, are for many yeares, left to be terrible to my Selfe. Who have long since thought it Ridiculous, to Court Sleep by Opiums, and protract Death by Cordialls; which is but the Head of the same Species, being both the effect of an unavoydable Lassitude. Yet though Life is imposed upon Mortalls without, if not against their Consent, it cannot be denyed the strongest Result of the Highest Wisdom, to Situate Your Selfe so, as it may consume at the most ease, and with the least Perturbation; which is not to be expected from such a Flaring and intemperate [Page 148] a Course, as that of a Souldier: that can make choyce of no Friend nor Enemy, but what the State assignes Him; or proportion his Pitty or Justice, to his own Morality, but their Ambition and Jealousie, that Command in Chief. To whom in all things you are bound to obey, though contrary to the Grayn of Prudence it self. That arbitrary Government you so much complain of at home, being the best you can in Reason, expect to finde, in an Army abroad; Where, the Stresse of Discipline lies more upon the Administration of Severity, then Justice. Such as are reported to list themselves under the Black Prince of Darkn sse, draw Articles before they Consigne their Bloud; And have a Circle enchanted, with a Power to protect them: whereas a Souldier hath nothing to plead for, against actuall obedience, but the narrow [Page 149] Circumference of Protection, that lies in the will of a Generall. To whom, the Vertue and Valour of his Officers is no lesse formidable, in relation to his particular Jealousies, then the Vices and Cowardice, of his meaner Souldiers, are thought pernicious to Successe in the Field. Wherefore no Prince deserves such Honourable Attendance as those, that Head their Armies themselves. Generalissimo's like Stepfathers, carrying no other Naturall affection, but for the Advancement of their own Glory. So as they esteem, all inferiour Merit, as an Intrusion upon Theirs: It being ordinary with Custom, to award Fame to such as have least deserved it; and asperse with Infamy, those of more Glorious Merit. I confesse Necessity cannot onely abate the Edge of these Reasons; but turne their Poynts against the Urger. Yet, [Page 150] since it is not impossible, but that the Electour may have miscarried in his Allegeance towards the Emperour, it cannot be indiscreet or impertinent to mind you, of the Hazard and small reward they commonly are capable of, that render themselves Arbitrators of a Forreign Difference; I do comply with you, in all the Pitty, Prayers, and Contributions can be offered for the Restitution of the Vertuous Lady Elizabeth: yet shall reserve my Person to bestow upon the Preservation of my Country, in the quarrell of which, I can onely justifie, the spilling of my own Blood, or that of others. The universall imployment of a Souldier, not being yet legally made out to me, by any Injunction either Morall, or Divine. The Practice of the Switzers in relation to Forreign Quarrells, appearing as remote from Christian Charity, as Natural Prudence. It cannot [Page 151] be denyed, but That Souldiers are necessary, during the Distracted times of Invasion: So it is as true, That few Callings are looked upon with more Disdain, when a Nation enjoyes an absolute Tranquillity. Wherefore it can be no Act of Discretion, to inrole your self, under a Profession, onely in esteem, during the Worser Ages, and not the Best. Wherein maims are considered rather as marks of an inconsiderate and brutish Valour, then a temperate and advised Prudence. Were You thrown upon it, by the Iron Hornes of an unavoydable Compulsion, or flattered into it, out of a more then probable Assurance of an Honourable Advantage; Something might be objected to the Prayers of Your Friends, and contrary Desires of your Enemies: who may not unpossibly tempt you, into this uncertain Hope, out of a Design, to rob you of all you really enjoy. [Page 152] Consider your Education, how much a Stranger it hath been, to the incommodious Treatment the Field doth afford: Out of whose Verge, it is more decent and safe, still to preserve your Selfe, then, at any time to retire, though upon the highest Provocation; of whose legitimacy, your Enemies from whom you part, will be the Arbitrators, and not your Friends, to whom you return. Warre being a turbulent and destructive Calling, with more Credit and Safety alwayes neglected, then at any time for saken. He that never fought, receiving a fairer Encomium from Charity, then a Captain that hath deserted his Poste. Nor doth a Colonel stand for more, then a single Wheele, in the Frame of an Army, where the Generall remaines Heir to all Desert.—The rest is lost.
A Letter to Mr. W. P.
THe continuance of your Acquaintance is the highest Pinnacle of my Ambition. And from whence I am not onely tempted, but do willingly submit to the lowest of your Commands. In the pursuance of which, I came on purpose, to meet you at B.—loaden with the strongest Advice, so weak a judgement is able to man-out. But I find, Your own Wisdom hath given me the Opportunity, to spare my English; By discovering to you, without the help of a Prospective, or the dearer prejudice of a Tryall, what I found verified through many Yeares Experience, viz. That Honourable Persons, like too great Fires, may warm and comfort such as are Content only to serve them at a Distance: But blast the Parts, and consume [Page 154] the Fortunes of those are found to attend them in any neerer relations. Who gayn, for the most part like the Birds that follow the Crocodile, no richer Reward, then the Reversions of their Teeth. It being usuall with these Monsters in Nature, to esteem none capable of Desert, but such, as Fortune, or Basenesse hath made necessary to their Vices, or Power. The First of which, is as much below the Breeding, as the Other, is the Candour of a Gentleman: To whom, it is incongruous, to leave the Honour he was born to, at the foot of that Ladder, he hopes to ascend by, to a greater. Neither, have they that are instrumentall to their Rapine, a more noble imployment, then those Beasts reported of in the Indies: who hunt the prey for the Lyons, and after by his strength they are subdued, must rest satisfied with what the Covetousnesse of their Master [Page 155] shall leave undevour'd.
For my Selfe, as none can, with Affection, look upon the Gulph, hath swallowed up his Felicity: So I remain in so high a Feud with Greatnesse, as, if I did not find [Lord] in my Daily Prayers, I should not name it (in relation to Servant) without Detestation. The which Lord, had I served as I ought, The other would have been no more known to me, then Leopards, Wolves, and Tygers, seldom, if ever, seen by us, but in Grates and Pictures. Yet how manifest soever this Truth is, I am not so foolish my Selfe, or think Others so Wise, as to esteem any Precept, or Example strong enough to restrain the unsupported Ignorance of Young men from falling into this Trap; bayted with more Ease, though far lesse Assurance, then Law, Physick, &c. For this Course often neglected, ni which Hundreds perish for One [Page 156] that thrives; who is yet found to be more imperious then the Master himself. Since the powerful Word of God assisted by the Rhetorick of Divines, is not of Efficacy sufficient to keep them from following Pride, Lust, and Drunkenness, though Hell be assigned for the Conclusion. But, if yo udesire a more full, and elegant prosecution of this Theame, I refer you to Lucian: Having already exceeded my First intention, which was only to Kisse your Hands, and in fewer words, to assure you that I am
Another to the Same.
HAd you not assur'd me you were not well, I should easily have guessed it my Self; from the Commendation your Letter gave to mine.
Which cannot but be rather the effect of a Fever, then your Judgement. To which, though I am so highly obliged for the present, as to gain a more honourable esteem in your Fancy, then, without the like Mediation, I could possibly have attained: Yet I do not onely abhor this, but all Advantages else, That own the least semblance of a Prejudice to you. So as I could not have been thus Romantique, but that the last Line, prov'd a Cordiall to the First; By expunging all fear of Future Danger, in respect of your [Page 158] Health. And for Prudence, I find it by the Elegancy of your Style, and the Solidity of Matter, so far rather increased, then diminished, as I am confident your opinion is, by this time, alter'd in reference to my Desert: Though I am willing to flatter my Self, That your Love continues. But whether the Horse follows the Chariot, or the Chariot the Horse, Persons of Parts are found to make so great a Descent, which submit themselves to this Course of Servitude, That they waken the Admiration of Lookers-on, much more, then the Apprehensions of those, that, like me, have, so apparently, suffered in their particular Interests: It being impossible to imagine a greater Lunacy, Then to cast away Time, Freedom, and Fortune after such, as so little regard it, That they esteem it Reward sufficient for the most of their Servants, [Page 159] If they have an Opportunity to observe the Basenesse of their Natures, For what is gotten by them, belongs rather to their own Impudence, or Importunity; then the Bounty, or Goodnesse of their Masters: Since he that remains Defective, in one of these Two Court-Vertues, shall be compell'd to make a Third of pure Necessity. Let a man consume A Prentiship with a Citizen: At the end of the Time, It is his own Fault, if he be not able to Live. But when a Trades-man (Like one of his Majesties Antique Statues) is taken out of a base Cellar or Vault, (no Prodigy in our Dayes) and set up at Court; It is his least care to provide for his Servants, unlesse necessary to his Vices, or the Infirmities that proceed from them. Such being able to Ride him where they please; either, over their Fellows, or Strangers, by way of Terrour, or [Page 160] Disdain: Or Curvet, and prance with his Complements, in token of Respect. They resembling, for the most part, Oranges, that yeild nothing but upon squeezing. I confesse, the Dependance on a Monster of this kind, may be of excellent use for Protection, in these Fat all Times, where Innocency is found too weak for Deceit: Could it be obtain'd without a greater Losse. But as in a Contract with the Divell, the First thing parted with, is Hope of Future Felicity: So a Secretary must quit his Freedom, or Imployment; being tyed to so strict an Attendance, as his Lord is no more able to spare him, then his own Brains, or Thumbs. By which, the Slavery becomes so great, as it can receive no Compensation from Profit. Wherefore such as are wisest, retain onely The Acquaintance of Great men: whom I have observed to thrive better then their Meniall [Page 161] Servants. It being usuall with them, to bestow benefits on those that least deserve. And to him, they have injured by denying a just Reward, it is their mode, to become an Enemy. As I have found most certainly true, who am
POSTSCRIPT.
I Have sent you this to serve as a Black-Patch, or Foyle; to set out the Beauty of your Virgil. And therein you may observe the strength of Affection: which for your sake is able to raise in me the Enthusiasmes of a Poet; from whose Inspiration, this Oracle is pronounced.
THis Work is finish'd so, as no Supply
Can be expected from Posterity.
Nor could thy Authour's Laurell match thy Btyes,
Hadst thou appear'd with him, in Caesar's dayes.
Yet, he that this Translation dares to slight,
Must not admire to see a Moore wash'd white,
And chan'gd to English-Beauty: losing none
Of what was Hers; But adding of his owne.
If that our Northern Paint be not so good,
'Tis not thy Fault: whose Pencil understood
No lesse then any Roman's. And this shall
Struggle for Fame with the Originall:
And waste more Bloud, & Inck, then in the strife
Between those States who first gave Homer Life,
Which will be Justice. For he did undo
By writing then, what Wit entayl'd thee to.
Like to an Elder-Brother that is Curst
In all things else: yet priz'd for comming First.
But to Conclude the wishes of my Heart,
Oh that my Prayse could equall thy Desert,
A Letter perswading —.— to marry.
THough your Contexture makes me confident, you will not hazard the Dansing Couranios with Apes in Hell: yet it is none of the least Modern Miracles, why you stay so long unmarried. As if you had an Antidote to repell Age, and were proof against the Weapons of Time; or had a Receipt to recover his Locks worn off, by such, as neglect to lay hold on the present Occasion: which you would never do, had you seriously consider'd the present Condition of your Mother; (whose youth is said, so blasphemous is Tradition, rather to have exceeded, then come short of your present Beauty:) How a few Yeares hath changed Alabaster into Wainscot, and ruffled her Neck like a walking Buskin: So that [Page 164] such, as would once have crossed Seas, but for an apparition of her, cannot but now think it Ominous, to meet her Fasting. If you resolve upon none, till you pattern the Character your Fancy presented me, (when I had last the Honour to kisse your Hands, and heard the Scorn wherewith you received the Offer of—I must be bold to tell you, I took it rather as a Copy of your Countenance, then any thought could take its Originall from the Discretion I ever own'd you Lady of) you may as well expect a New Creation. Since, so much perfection, as your Language did then paynt, is not to be found out of a Romance; or the short Entertainment, during a Lovers Passion; which once, throughly cured, by Fruition, is not found rarely to recoyle into as great, a Contrary Extreame. I confess, Wise, Constant, [Page 165] and Compleate Servants may be had; but few such Husbands, whose mindes are no lesse altered by Marriage, then Drunken Men are by Sleep: but become like them, weary and sick, of what they formerly took delight in; upon the Apprehension, That he which yokes himself to a Woman, forfeits his Prudence, no lesse, then She doth hazard her Repute, who incircles a Man in her Arms before Enchanted by the Priest, through Custome and Shame made farre more necessary to you, then Men. Wherefore finding that Time is uncessantly nibling at youth, and Beauty the baite of your Trap: And that it is unlikely with no stronger Engines, To catch one that is Wise: Be nimble, and lay hold on this that is Rich. Who is confess'd none of the Seven Wise Masters; and therefore with more Ease to be Governed. The Felicities [Page 166] of Marriage, perishing in the Conflict arising between Man and Wife, Of equall Spirits and understanding. It being impossible there should want Contests, where both lay claym to a Capacity fit onely to be obeyed. Which, if you have him, will by all, be conceded on your side. So that, instead of being a Ward, (a Tenure every Married Woman holds from the Award of her Maker) you shall be Guardian of the Person and Estate of your Husband. Now, in relation to other things, upon the Score of which you may reckon stronger Felicities; They will be found, after enjoyment, to vanish into Cyphers. Learning becomming as unsociable for Ladies, as Half-witted Men are Wilfull and Jealous; Rocks that the softness of his Head gives sufficient caution for, So that, under this Conjunction, you may, without interruption, [Page 167] follow what Inclinations you please. Wherefore, if you resolve to marry, no Husband is more proper; whose Folly you may Exchange for Wisdom, when you please. And to renounce it quite, were, besides burying your Talent in the Ground, and robbing of the World, which you ought to leave as Rich as you found it: You should fall into the Condition of an old Mayd, then which nothing is more Despicable: who is acceptable in no Company. Not daring to come amongst Women, for fear of declaring more Knowledge then she can, with reference to Honesty own: Or approach Men out of the danger of Contempt. The Morall of Andromeda, is a History of your present Condition. Where, the Barren Rock She was tyde too, is Virginity. The Monster that came to devour her, Time. And he reported to deliver [Page 168] her, some witty-Spark, that perswaded her, to take a Rich---&c. to her Husband, might warrant the Accesse of one more acceptable. Oh, let Him have this Honour Faire Lady, who is
On a Looking-Glasse.
DEar Glasse, tell me, by what Art,
Thou bean'st Her Image without break-
When the same doe's crack my Heart, (ing?
Just as I am now a speaking.
On another which she said did Flatter.
BLame not your Glasse, that doth her Duty.
Nor can it Flatter so much Beauty.
But for the rest, in Policy,
It shewes them Fairer then they be.
Since if they saw their Faces true,
This, would be broke; and envy'd you.
Another.
DEar Glasse, joyn with her Eyes; and both (concurre
To Note more worth in me, and less in Her,
A Song.
THe Graces are, by Custom, bound
Once in an Age, All to be sound
In One creature: There to shew
And now having fix'd on Thee
Be not Proud: Since, you may see,
Time allowes them not to stay,
But to meet, and go away.
Yet though whilst these Guests be here,
You do rate their Lodging dear:
If you suffer me to take it,
I'le not break, when they forsake it.
The terms, of Fair and Good, do not express
Thy Worth, no more, then theirs, call Princes fine,
When deck'd in Diamonds, like the Stars they shine:
Nay, I'le maintain Their folly to be less;
Since such a Sight hath oft before been seen:
Whilst he that would inform a shape like thine,
Prometheus-like must filtch from things Divine.
On a Picture.
THough this be drawn exactly forth,
It doth no more retain her Worth,
Then the Shadow of a Rose
Can the Scent of one that growes.
Another.
BEtween This, & her Mind, there is that odds,
As is in Mans frail-workmanship and Gods.
A Letter to two Sisters the one Black the other Fair.
IT is Design, and, I hope, no Presumption in me, to joyn you in one: That, besides the opportunity of presenting the highest of my Respects, I might comprize in a single Letter, the totall Summe of all the perfection extant in Woman-Kind. Black and White, being the unquestioned Originall, of that infinite Variety of Beauty, (the mint of Nature) through which is maintained her Necessary Commerce of Generation. And, in this equall Distribution, Fortune hath shewn no small Ingenuity, (who is more Wanton, and Inexorable, then Blind or Carelesse) in assigning, that of least Duration, the Fewest Years. For if you did not Wither alike, Art and [Page 172] Opinion (the Limmers and Carvers of all Excellency,) would have tempted, if not Constrained every one, to serve, and adore that Sister onely, whose beauty had survived. By which, sweet Variety had been lost; and Perfection reduced into one Monarchy, Which, now, martch in your Two glorious Regiments. To both which, I remain an Equall Captive. Being,
Ladyes, &c.
BEauty is writ in severall Characters; (All?
None but are skil'd in some: Who finds out
Which votes them mad, do say, that this man errs
Because his choice is Black, or Low, or Tall;
Nature would have all pleas'd: And such as fall
On Ordinary Features, are less learn'd:
The Indian Beauties are as plain discern'd
By those do know their Figure, as the White.
Nor can Expression render it so right,
As may force others to approve the Text.
Reason with Tast, & Love, should not be vext.
A Letter to —— After the Death of his Lady.
I Know, I need not minde you, That all Sublunary things are Transitory: Dansing like the Atomes (the ancient Philosophers imagined the World not onely to be made of, but stuffed withall) between one Condition, and another. Life seeming to be lent, to keep Death in Imployment. And Generation, to serve onely for the production of Bodies; that the Fatall Sisters might not weave in vain, or want Creatures to vayl with their Garments of Mortality. But it is time to give over, at least, to turn down a Leafe; and refer the Inculcation of this Morality, till some fitter time; For fear of falling into their Indiscretion, are found to wake a [Page 174] Sick Friend, by an Impertinent Inquisition after his Condition, or the unseasonable Administration of a Direction which way to dispose of his Body. Since none can Calculate his Ease better, then the Patient: ‘Sorrow it selfe not being destitute of its Voluptuousnesse.’ Which, hoping you will not, too farre exceed: Give me leave, to Conclude That Manners exacted this; and Discretion no more but to assure you,
I am, &c.
AN EPITAPH.
STone, so long as thou dost last,
Let the Reader know thou hast
The Drosse of Her, once own'd a Mind
Contayn'd the worth of Woman-kind.
But no more: Who speaks her Glory,
Must have for every Dust a Story.
The Authours EPITAPH upon Himselfe.
I Envy not such Graves as take up room,
Meerely with Jet & Porphyry; since a Tomb
Adds no Desert: Wisdom, thou thing divine:
Convert my humble Soul into thy Shrine.
And then this Body though it want a Store,
Shall dignifie all places where 'tis throwne.
A Letter to disswade—from Marrying a Rich, but ugly and deformed, &c.
VVHen I heard at first, you went a Wooing to—I thought it a Trick put upon you by Enemies: but finding it Seconded, And seeing the fearfull Examples of Those, who out of Discontent, and a Desire to Change their present Condition, are found to Cast away Themselves; I begin to take your Danger to Heart. And do here, in the Sincerity of Affection, offer my Hand, to stay the Tying of that Knot, with which you go about to strangle your future Felicity. For, though I confesse the Party may not unpossibly be very Rich, yet it is as likely, The Things required to Dead the Apprehension of such A Loathsome Companion, will prove So [Page 177] Chargeable, as in a short time, Her Gold will be spent, and nothing left, but The Foul Beast that brought it.
Yet suppose you finde so much, as may beare the Expence of Mad Company, Whores and Drink, (Wicked Cordialls, though Generally used, to Correct such Poyson) Can you Divest Humanity so farre, as to make Her Partner in a Bed, is able to render you so much an Enemy to Womankind, as to exchange it for Sodomy? if not Bestiality it self? For though you may not be punished by Law, The Act will be severely Condemned, and esteemed Brutish, by all the Rationall part of the World; It not lying in the Gender or Kind, but Forme, to render a Creature Monstrous and Abominable to the Nature of Commerce. —I am so Charitable, (yet in Confidence of Others Vertue, rather then Her owne) as to believe She is a Virgin, in reference [Page 178] to Man: Who in that Action, might with more Justice, be punished for a Deflowrer of Himselfe, then Her. Wherefore you will have no more reason, to Brag of this Priviledge, Then He, that First Descended into Hell. Of whose Superlative Uglinesse (though her Body be so composed, As the Divell need not alter the Best of her Features, to make her resemble the Foulest of his Fiends; yet) it may be Numbered amongst the Questions, least Capable of Decision; Whether, That, or Her Mind, be most Crooked? And to cover this, (yet none of the worst of her Imperfections,) She is supported, like Tyranny, by Steele. From whence, her Breath is become so Noysome, as no Venomous thing can live, in her Presence: Nor any Person sick of the Mother, miscarry. Now what Effects her Embraces will work upon your Selfe, [Page 179] may be guess'd, by Groomes: — who in a small time, come to Outstink the very Beasts they are Conversant with.--And what is said, is so farre, from Hyperbolicall, As, it resembles Truth more then she does a Woman. Yet all this, is but a slender Security, to warrant Posterity upon, should such a Monster Confute Philosophy, in producing her Like, For;
If Money be so prevalent, as to make you sell your Liberty; why may it not Hire another, to become so much a Slave, as to do your Drudgery? Who, cannot be, upon serious thoughts, thus Singular; As, to preferre, The absolute Possession of a Dung-Boat, before, The having a Partner in a Tall Ship. But if so fond of Wealth, as to break through these Considerations: Teach Her to Cover her Face, and not Salute your Friends. Or, if she must be [Page 180] Kiss'd, (The Strongest Complement was ever used) Let her Disrobe Her—not possible to be more Noysome, then her Mouth. If Prose be not Tart enough, to weane you, from so Childish a Resolution; For the Feare of Poetry desist: which may make you the Subject of a Comedy. And Guesse by these Verses of a Friend, what Enemies may say.
CAn you but think, the Antient Blindness Great,
When Men made Gods, of that which we make
Or wonder those by Nile, could offer Fat (Meat?
And goodly Oxen, to an ugly Cat?
Yet you (no lesse advised) to a Witch
Will sell your Fate, in hope for to be Rich.
Who like the Idolls, in a Pagan Feast,
Carries a Monkeys Face, upon her Breast,
Shadow'd with Shoulders: under which, doth stay
A Bonnet crouching, like a Hill at Sea.
Nor may her Bosome fayle of a Device,
To hatch an Egge into a Cockatrice.
Or turn Men Atheists, who believe no Elves
Can now be found, but what we make our Selves.
[Page 181]Were She in
India, where they serve the
Devill, Not out of Hope of Good, but Feare of Evill,
They would adore Her: Lest her Sun-like Nose
Should Burn, and Smoke Tobacco, as it growes.
Or, lest the Venom of her loathsom Breath,
Might blow some soule Contagion ore the Earth.
Or, That the Spaniards, by her malice taught,
Might learn more Cruelty, then ere they thought.
Yet amongst all the People, worst misted,
None ever took a Fiend into his Bed.
Which proves, that Nature doth abhor your Deed
In offering to a Demon, Human Seed.
And what will be your Issue, joyn'd with Her,
None can resolve you, but a Conjurer.
For while She is in Labour, You may heare
The Good-wives skreak: and some Physitian sweare
It is a Child. And that he findes in writ,
Such Births; Before, the Priest dares Christen it.
Now if this cannot Move you, May your Taske,
Be to beget a Compleate Anti-Mask.
A Letter in Reference to a Coy LADY.
THough I confesse, The Lady you recommended, may prove a Pleasure to Others, are at Leasure wholly to intend Making Love: (No Hare being better provided of Muces and Shifts to put off Followers then She) yet, so Dull a Soul as mine, in the Apprehension of the Difference, between One Individuall Beauty, and Another, is still ready, with the Màyor of London to Lose all the Pleasure of Hunting, in the Insignificant (though [Page 183] perhaps to Others Eares pleasant) Cry of the Hounds. Catching of Larkes and Sparrowes lesse Chargeable and Troublesome, being more Acceptable and gratefull to some Complexions, then Hawking at the Heron. The latter being too full of Splendour, Noyse, Delayes, and Impertinent Complements for a Person, that like me, is not born with the Patience To run after A Flying Beauty; Or spend time in Beating for that, another will Find to [...]y Hand, for a Smaller Summe, then may Compense, The tearing my Repute, or Burthening my Conscience with Vaine and Fallacious Oathes and Covenants. In the Administration of which, She is as Punctuall, as the Calydonian Commissioners.
Yet I cannot deny, but That, She is richly Worth the Purchase, of [...]ny that Own the Knack of such [Page 184] Amorous Zelots, as have The Patience, to continue still Whining, where they Know, through the Consciousnesse of their own Unworthinesse, That they are not Likely to be Heard. Making a Sincere profession of Love and Respect, when Their Chiefest Intent is onely to plunder, What I fear, This Lady, is to Seek of, already; or else fouly bely'd. None Keeping Their Avenues more strictly Barred, then Such as have been Robb'd already in this Kind. Wherefore having Cast up by my Self the whole Value of the Adventure; I finde it no more then I can truck for, neerer home, and with greater Ease, and Conveniency to my Self.
Yet, before I break out into an Open Rebellion against so Soveraign and Absolute a Beauty, I will Present her with This inclosed Petition. To which, If she gives not a Satisfactory [Page 185] and Full Answer, I am resolved to break off all further Addresse. And to proclaim Her a Tyrant. And her Subjects absolved from their Oathes and Obedience. So, as for the Future it may be lawfull for them, to inrole Themselves under the Red and White Colours of any Other Mistresse they esteem more Debonaire.
The Petition.
I Pray Dispatch my Suit, or else Deny it;
For if I spend more Time, I dearly Buy it:
If you distrust my Truth, I do protest,
By That which binds Men most, I Love you best.
— It is not our of Fear, That I should Tell.
You never heard me Brag, when I did well.
Or is't t'engage Me more, that you delay it?
None better knows the Grant, nor how to pay it.
Is it the Sin you fear Which None can Guesse?
Cutting off Oathes, and Time, you make it Lesse.
Nay'tis no Fault in you, to lessen Mine.
Better once Drunk, then still to thirst for wine.
— Hath Nature made a [...]ot below your Z [...]ne?
My Love would cover it, and count it None.
Have you a Servant, that you think, is true?
I have a Mistresse too: And yet, Love you.
I you can adde to these Objections more,
Pay Me for what is past, and I'le give o're.
A Character on a deboshed Souldier.
HE carries no Signe of Reputation but in his Mouth; and that he suffers to run over, with tedious Stories of his own Valour: to justifie which, he hath wished his Damnation so often, as it is now sure; rendring him uncapable of any other Peace of Conscience, but what he findes in Drink, or the operation of no Diviner Spirit, then that incites to Lust and Revenge; his Religion being so farre of his owne making, as he imagines God, like his [Page 188] Old Host, best pleased, by the Largest Reckonings. With his Tongue he desires Warres, but is in Heart at peace with All, but his Maker. He had rather be thought behind-hand for Money, then Word: and will sooner, satisfie an Enemy, then a Friend, being readier to requite, what he receives in Anger, then Love; Injuries, then Good Turns. Rendring himself a Slave to Martiall and arbitrary Justice for a small Salary, under the improbable pretence of Freeing Others. Nor dares this Gladiatour, that rants so high in Taverns, and on the Ale-bench, oppose any thing but Patience, to the highest Affront, a Superiour Officer is pleased to put upon him. Though no Papist, he abhorres the Church. And like some of our Reformists, carries no more Marks of a Protestant, then what is legible in Perjury, &c. yet brags more of his Whoring [Page 189] and Drinking, then any Catholick doth of his Good Works. Who is thus farre Happy, that though he wants Faith to make him a True Saint, he ownes not so much Hypocrisie, as to appear so. And therefore more capable of Repentance, then those that Plunder and Murther others, under a secret Pretence, of Honouring that God, he openly prophanes. He brags much of his Scarres, which truly examined, prove rather the Effects of Intemperance, then Marks of Valour: his Face bearing the Hideous Impresse of Pots and Glasses, received not in the Fields of Mars, but the easier-entred Sconces of Bacchus. Whose Discourse, though it travell'd still betwixt one besieged place, or Leaguer, to another, yet it was alwayes Tedious. And if you altered the Subject, his understanding appeared proof against all Sense. [Page 190] After whom followed this Epitaph.
At the Saracens Head Tom powr'd in Ale and (Wine,
Untill his Face did represent the Signe.
To Dr. Ch. Chaplain to W. E. of Pem.
WHilest it pleased you to Communicate with me, in a Stile suitable to the frailty of my understanding, I took infinite content in the Converse; but since you have cloathed your Letters in the Thundering and Glorious Ornaments of Learning, I am not able to cope with you: Wherefore let me implore your favour so far as to lay these advantages by, and not render your Love terrible to me, who did never question your Power, but own you in the highest sublimity the world hath (being prompted by so much desert) advanced you to. And on such terms I may enjoy your Acquaintance, whereas otherwayes I shall be [Page 192] forced to take sanctuary in a perpetuall silence. Lest I should lose that little Reason I have, in seeking to Comprehend the infinitness of yours. And to avoyd any mis-information of the Quarrell at --- between my Lo --- and the E. of C --- It was teally thus. The K --- having though against his will, prevailed with my L. to go into the West, by reason of his Interest in those parts, with the other Councellors of State, in hope to facilitate the payment of the five Subsidies voted, but not given by Parliament, and now Christened a Royall [...]ne; The Commissioners being by the fire, A dispute arose between the two former Lords, whether it was possible for one had never been upon the place, to speak and understand French perfectly. The L --- of --- who you know never set foot out of England, maintained [Page 193] the Affirmative with so much eagerness, that the other who had not onely more Reason on his side, but the approbation of the Company, said my L. --- best Argument was noyse; a speech my L. replied was undecent for an Ea. of Complements. And upon this, The other returned the Lie. To which my L -- made him such a Manuall Answer, as the L. C. being penned up in his clothes, fell down, whereupon they were parted, and reconciled; shame, & the title of his Majest. gravest Privy Councellors facilitating the Composition. It is already arrived at the Spanish Ambassadors, who according to his facetious mode, put it upon the score of our English Valour; which the Gravest relations cannot make them to forget. I am still haunted for verses from our French Coriot, who is resolved to print his Book in English: Those I made are these.
WHat dost thou mean my friend, in this bad time,
To write of Vertue, when tis thought a Crime
Not to be Vitious? such a Book would sell,
Could prove all Damn'd, did offer to do well:
Or find that Pimping is a lawfull trade,
Because that Sarah brought her Lord a Maid;
Or vindicate what Origen hath cast, (last;
That Court and Hell shall meet in Heaven at
Or prove that Incest is a Veniall Sin,
Because that Lot defil'd his neerest Kin.
O could'st thou maintain this, then thou should'st be
Rais'd to high place for thy Divinity.
Then lose no time, let Goodnesse take her chance,
Whil'st you comply with Sin and Ignorance.
On a Cook.
A Cook is a Baud to the Mouth. That Kills his own Stomack, to quicken his Master's. Who Lives like a Bear by licking his Fingers. Before a Feast, he in his White sleevs, and Apron resembles the Ephod of a Priest; and seems to be preparing rather a Sacrifice, then a Supper. In which, the Grand-Sallat may justly be thought to personate an Idoll. His office is a representation of hell: where all sorts of Creatures are tormented in Flames, to satisfie the depraved and Various Nature of the Tastes of men. Whose Pleasures, and highest Contentments, are no otherwayes to be compleated, but at the prejudice of their Fellow Animalls: [Page 196] Over which, Reason, not Strength, hath purchased them the Soveraignty, So much abused in this world, as may render the worst of punishments, just, in the next. His profession somthing quadrates with Heraldry: Varying no lesse in Sawces, then they do in Colours, Bendes, Fesses and metalls; And are as much puz'led about marshalling the Dishes, and calculating the precedency, at the Table, of a Wood-Coek, or Wigeon; a Gull, or Gosling, as, the other are, in placing Lords, and Ladyes. But this, and all the rest of his Learning, and Industry, concludes as I do, in an Excrement: which I wish in his — &c. And so, leave him to Blaspheme in the Kitchin: or Cooling his Tongue in the Cellar.
A Character of an Host.
AN Host is one who Thrives with Drinking, and growes Rich by Entertainments. He is of vast Acquaintance, but can number Few Friends: besides Those resulting from Travaile, or Necessity. His Conversation is alike to All men, that he may gain the more Money. Being, equally Hospitable, to every Religion he can save by. Giving his Guest the best Content or'e Night, out of hope to please himself in the morning. The Government of his house is Tyrannicall, all Taxes being Arbitrary, at the will of [Page 198] his Wife, who sits Regent in the Kitchin. Yet every one that enters, takes his Chamber, for the time he stayes, as his own, With no lesse assurance, then Don Quixot did the whole Mansion, for an Enchanted Castle. He ventures, that reason he hath, in all Companyes. And in Defiance of any Drink the weary Travelour pleaseth to call for, which if said to be mingled, or adulterate, He calls the Name of God, and the person of the Drawer to attest the Contrary. The Signe is the Scheme, by which, you may take the Ascendent of his Understanding. And his Half-peck, the Measure of his Conscience; of which his Osteler is Chancellour, and keeps the Key: Making no more of Cheating a Strangers Horse, then his Mistresse doth in Over-reaching both. If her Husband be grown into his [Page 199] perfect Symmetry, his Belly bears the exact proportion, of the biggest Jugg. And his Face of That, in the First Edition of Frier Bacon's Works. He suits his Discourse, as Fidlers do their songs, to the Eares of the Hearers: choosing rather to offend Truth, then his Company. And, in case, any ride double, he proclaims them Man and Wife: as far more willing to foment Bawdery, then foule two pair of sheets. He is seldome far out of the way, though Drunk or Hang'd: The First, being as neer the Road of his Profession, as the Latter is of that of his Desert.
YOuth, wit, and Beauty, like a painted Sign
May stay a Stranger: but 'tis sprightfull
wine,
And decent welcom makes him 'light and Dine;
For who will pass his time in such a place,
Where nought appeares, of moment, but a
Face?
Deductions from the History of the Earl of Essex, who was executed for Treason, under the Reign of Queen Elizabeth; with a modest Answer to Sir Henry Wotton.
THe Love of a People, may be observed, of no lesse dangerous a consequence for a Subject to trust to, then their hatred proves to such Princes as are so unwary as to neglect it. For after that Sir Robert Cecil had prevailed so farre upon his own Brother, the Earl of Exceter (most else refusing the imployment, out of Love or feare) as to proclaim Essex Traitor: He appeared, deserted by all, but [Page 202] some few unfortunate Gentlemen, whose Lives out of Gratitude, or Want, depended wholly on his.
Nor is the Affection of a Prince, lesse permanent, then their Anger deadly. And in the first of these the Queen was unconstant, in the latter inexorable. Wherefore, if during so long a reign, no great quantity of Blood was spilt, it rather resulted from her Subjects Innocency, then any propensity to forgiveness, inherent in her Nature. Nothing comming so hardly from her, as a pardon; I mean of such faults, as concerned her self. And in this she shewed a rare prudence, in becoming able to raise a prositable use out of a Naturall defect, for (born of that sex, allowed by all as the weakest in Judgement) she lay more obnoxious to a Censure of insufficiency, then that of Tyranny: the sternnesse of whose looks, hath in all ages [Page 203] scared away contempt, the inseperable Companion of a cheap and effeminate Nature.
So as neither Leicester, Hatton, nor any other Minion, could ever extract so much favour from her, as might serve their Lands or Heires, from refunding what their Fathers had mis-spent: Her favours keeping no Servant company, beyond the Land of the Living. The most apparent reason why the Lady Elizabeth Hatton cast her selfe into the contaminated arms of Atturny Cook Nor could her disposition to severlty be in any thing more manifest, then the extraordinary meanes used but to defer the execution of the Earl of Southampton, who had besides pity, the enemies of Essex to plead for him: yet she continued inflexible towards mercy, till the same hand that led her into the temptation, did like the Divels, [Page 204] shew her the glory she was fallen from already, in her Subjects opinion, by quenching his, and their enemies malice with the Blood of their Darling. Nor was this hard-extracted Mercy unsuitable to the emergency of the present occasion, for (as I have been often told) not onely those that did in the peoples opinion, contribute to the murther (as many called it) of the Earle: But the Queen herself, was exposed to some publique affronts. The spectators she passed through in every town, (especially in London) becomming far thinner and muter then formerly they were.
Some Princes love not that Child is in order to succeed them: but all abominate a stranger lyes under that notion; the cause that she, contrary to the well-being of the Subject, no lesse then the priviledge of Parliament, Committed Pigot and [Page 205] Wentworth, for moving to know the Man, and beheaded Essex, but for making a smal demonstration of offering himself: Though the later Roman Tyrants took that little security they did enjoy, from a quite contrary course. But this was at a time when the blood Royall lay extinct, and the possession of the crown fell to his share had the Keenest Sword and strongest head-piece: In which case the most probable way to secure the Prince, was the declaring his Successour, who to preserve his own dignity, was likely to take revenge on any should assassinate him in the throne before, a thing very ordinary in those depraved times; not so in England, where during her Reign, there were no lesse then fourteen titles, good and bad, which by her Silence were all kept quiet. For till she made a publique declaration, none had a just cause to [Page 206] complain. And in case any endeavoured to have succeeded by force, she had a fair choice out of the rest to make opposition, none being free from some considerable defect or other. The Parliament remaining wholly at her devotion, and no Ill-willers to Essex; The Commons being as fearfull of the Regiment of a Stranger, as the Peerage were jealous of the house of Harford, or any else deducible out of their own Body. Fortune appearing then in all particulars so strong on Essex side, as she seemed rather unable, then unwilling to bear out the charge of his folly, who put her upon such Impertinent errands, as the Dutch youth do fooles on the second of Aprill: Through which she became so far tired, as she was forced at last to return him a Block and a Hatchet. This unconstant Deity, being in the number of such giddy Auxiliaries, [Page 207] as none can be sure what side she will take, and therefore not to be trusted by a wise man. The most steady if not signall events, having been brought about without any other mediation of hers, but what is unpossible to be avoided; in which sense she is rather capable of the title of Providence, then Luck. Fortune resembling a cane, which no wise man, but in an unavoidable necessity will hazard the weight of his whole rest upon. Wherefore the Earl of Essex, if he had not been befated with a strong Opinion of success in all his actions, (though built on the weakest foundation) would never have referred his life & future well-being to the sole arbitration of Chance, and the unconstant guidance of a Womans Affection: which being onely skin-deep, could not but in a Court, furnish a person of far lesse magnitude then a Soveraign power [Page 208] with choice enough: Especially after his enemies, for their own security, had so far Indulged his, as to furnish him with an Army paid by the Queen, and chosen by himself. Nor were the greatest families then in Rebellion in Ireland, (rendred by the most probable reports) lesse obedient to him then his respective Officers: And if these advantages had been too little to have set the Crown upon his head, after the decease of his Mistrisse, he might have had any men, or mony from the most Catholick King; who would have advanced his designes, or any naturall English Subjects else, that had but opposed the Scottish Succession. Which was formerly projected by Leicester, and the onely visible occasion he managed the English force in the Netherlands with so little care, and worse successe, who immediately [Page 209] began to prosper upon his remove. But Essex had Religion and Fidelity, inherent in his Nature, Humours known so Incompatible with Ambition, as it was no lesse unsafe for him to court a Crown, then it did after prove Incongruous and mis-becomming, for his more frigid Son to make Love, and Importune Ladies. Nor is this a conjecture of my own, but what I have often heard averred by the friends of Sir Charles Danvers, whose youngest Sister married my eldest Brother. And that the Honesty of Essex (never denied to exceed his Discretion) might for the present moderate his Ambition: But how he would have behaved himself in the company of an absolute power, may be safer now disputed by us, then at that time experimented by the Queen. Successe in those that wear it, expunging like Aqua Fortis all former marks of [Page 210] Allegiance or Probity. For though his first thoughts might be of no larger extent, then to remove Cecil, and other declared enemies, under the notion of evil Counsellers, that powred into her Eares such tales as were disadvantagious to the true Religion, and Policy of the State: Yet that point gained, he could not from a lower Station then a Throne, have satisfied so many, wiser men then himself, whose clearer insight into the advantages he was then in possession of, had tempted to be adventurers with him. So as all the favour could have accrued to his Mistris from a more happy success then befell the Earl, exceeded not the Complement of continuing her in his lap, (a place not likely to sute long with her Age, or his occasions.) Queen Elizabeths Reign, having been too reserved, quietly to have indured from an Administrator [Page 211] (she remaining yet in being) so profuse an expence of honour and Riches, as was expedient to be thrown to such a needy party, as had already Imbarqued themselves in his service, whose fidelity and strength (the Nurslings of hope, reward and preferment) was requisite to maintain him on the Stage. For though possibly, his desires might terminate in a removall of his Enemies; They had no honester design then to raise themselves, without much reference had to the meanes. From whence it is easie to contemplate the prodigious Disparities in Rebellion; which though begun upon never so just, moderate, or Religious pretences, necessity, ambition, and Humane frailty will interject so many new and unexpected pretences, and events, as it rarely concludes, without the ruine of it self, or the Commonwealth; which once [Page 212] suffered to grow intemperate and run over, it doth like a Pot consume its own fat, and loseth its former strength and Glory, by raising the drosse and dregs of her Subjects, uppermost.
One cause of his presumption was, The fond Opinion he had, that she would not rob her eyes of the great delight she took in his Person. A fantasticall over-weening of himself, and womans Affection, to whom, no single mans perfections was ever yet found continually Gratefull.
Now such as wonder, how she durst bring him to the Scaffold, for fear of her own Honour, are not throughly studied in the boldnesse of Princes (whose faces are continually steeled with the varnish of a grosse Flattery, put upon their worst Actions) no more then the compunctions of Dying Men, who desire rather to clear themselves towards [Page 213] God, and the world, then impertinently to accuse others: Besides, a hope of Pardon, not to be cut off but with his Head, was a sufficient Reason to restrain him from breaking out into any intemperate ranting against his Prince: As Biron of France, did not long after, most Imprudently fall into, in reference to his King, Henry the Fourth, Dying in the opinion of the generality, rather like a mad man, then a Christian. Yet had Essex unloaded his bosome of all it did contain, it might possibly not have swelled to so great a bulk, as did then appear in the Opinion of the most: or that it may after be blown up to by flatulent Posterity (seldom endued with so even a fortune, as to have truth and falshood weighed to it in an equall Ballance) manisest in a number of Relations extant at home, and abroad. The Bloud she inherited, no lesse then her Father's [Page 214] humour, having procured her no good opinion from the Church, according to whose Dialect the generality did heretofore, out of Ignorance, or reverence, tune their belief.
Had he been true to his first Principles, moulded by some more dexterous heads then his own, which was to spin out his time, together with the Irish war, till a certain report of the Queen's sickness, or death had come to him, from such an unquestioned number of his own Confidents, as were able to have assured belief; It might in reason have presented him with his wish, or at worst so much power, as would have made him arbitrator of the next succession. But hast, proceeding from a Naturall Impatience to live out of England, and the contrary advice received from some neer about him (suborned to destroy him) rendered [Page 215] all addle: By perswading his return without an Army, upon a false report raised of her Majesties Death, the time assigned, wherein to shew himself. And to this end, the Warres in Ireland were prolonged, with no weaker endeavours, then Montjoy used after to conclude them, Owner of no other project but the reducing of that Province unto obedience: Essex presuming so farre upon the peoples affections, that he thought the sound of his coming able to raise an Army whereever he came.
Essex, if he had been master of parts strong enough to have mounted him into the Saddle of Soveraignty, might have found by the beating of the Parliament (a true pulse of the Nation) That there was no probability to raise any advantagious distemper for him, during the life of the Queen: The people apprehending [Page 216] little other cause of discontent, but what might arise from the thought, that their present felicity depended only on the continuance of an Old Lady; After whom, they expected more dismall dayes, then their Love could ever have imagined from the Government of Essex.
Wherefore to lay the Sceane of any thing carried but the vizard of a Rebellion in London (at that time abounding with riches and felicity) was an act savouring of so great Imprudence, as I wonder his enemies should bring him to it, or his Friends suffer him to prosecute: As I have often told some at that time neer about him, who made me no other answer, but that he perished between his own presumption, and others Infidelity. His security might have been more, and losse lesse, had he gone into Wales, when he passed [Page 217] through London, where he had great love both by Inheritance from his Father (a good Landlord) and his own purchase, alwayes of a liberall Nature. Nor did he fail to wear a Leek on St. David's day, but besides, would upon all occasions vindicate the Wetch Inhabitants, and own them for his Countrymen, as Queen Elizabeth usually was wont, upon the first of March. And by this the Earl grew so popular amongst these people (especially such as had little to lose,) that without all question, so many would have appeared in his favour, as might have procured him audience from her Majesty, and not improbably the removall of his enemies, under that notion hated by the generality, no lesse then those linked to him, under a more strict friendship. Or if this had been too hard a task, their strength and meanes was not likely to want [Page 218] power, to land him again in Ireland, from whence he had been drawn by his own folly, and the wisdom of his maligners; where not onely the English, but the natives (to those in actuall Rebellion) were his reported servants. The Catholiques, till they were better Cajoled by the Scotish Kings Confidents, not obstructing his Designes. And how secure he would have been, in that Province, may be guessed by Tyrone, the Capitall Rebell, who notwithstanding more impartial indeavours then the Lord Lieutenant Essex had used, did obtain his Pardòn, in a manner maugre the English forces.
Essex was too honest to have removed every Impediment lying in the way to Soveraignty, nothing but death being able to gagg a person robb'd of a Crown. Yet her Successour met with no opposition, though bred in an ayre ever Pestiferous [Page 219] to this Nation; which wisely considered, might have tempted a people to have disputed his entrance, till caution given. But the Riches and felicities injoyed, during the incomparable Reign of Queen Elizabeth, hung yet like holy dayes at their fingers ends, by which they were become so effeminate, and unadvised, as to choose rather to fall into an Incurable Consumption, then hazard a little the shaking by a few fits of a Fever; which if chosen, might not unlikely have proved as wholesome Physick for King James as England; Who wanting a Legall pretext, had nothing left him in safety strong enough to refell the Brazen-faced Impudence of his Countrymens Importunity. But the last Scene of Princes, like the Catastrophe of a Play, is so hudled up, and every one so intent upon his own particular Interest, (being muffled [Page 220] by hope or fear) as that is left meerly to the disposition of Fortune, which ought onely to be intrusted with Prudence her self. Nor did the readiness of the Scots to Arm, (in hope of so much plunder, as this Nation might afford, shrouded under the specious pretence of Henry the 7s. eldest daughter) portend less in the ears of the unresolved, then a possibility of Conquest, the most ungratefull sound to the formerly free People of England. Neither did these conjectures receive small aggravation from those formerly suborned, to promote the entrance of the Stuarts, who if Essex had remained true to his principles, might have been saluted on the borders, by an Army strong enough to have moderated the Scots conditions, or advanced his own. Though it was the universall Opinion, that Essex's Ambition, did like the great [Page 221] Earl of Warwick's, terminate in a desire to bring in James on his own score.
It is not probable the Earle carried any evill meaning towards the Common-wealth, because neither his enemies, nor friends are found to mention any endeavour in him to call in a Forreigner: Wherefore if the Crown was his Mistresse, he used the most decent way of wooing her, which was onely through the Mediation of her native Subjects. Yet I doubt whether he had justly calculated the weight of this Circumstance, That Conscience is as dangerous in an Usurper, as Cruelty, and excesse is deadly, and undecent, in him doth Legally succeed.
I have heard it, though looked upon by me as a Paradox, that Essex would have vindicated the English freedom, by reviving such ancient Priviledges as had been pretermitted, [Page 222] during the Tyrannicall reigns of the two last Henries; And no wayes indulged by Queen Elizabeth, which not extending all her time beyond a few particulars, was then less discernable. No act of hers being registred so contrary to the grain of her own people, as the death of this man; the Queen of Scots being looked upon as a Catholick, which in the generall dialect of England at that time, signified no less then a sworn enemy to God and the Prince, (so zealous, if I may not say surious, are all changes) that it was passed over, without any apprehension of honour, or pitty, as justified by the cruell Massacre committed not long before upon the French Hugenots, at the instigation of that Kings Mother. An Act through which the Integrity of Princes was much ahated. But whether his nation by reason of her divers [Page 223] titles, and disparity in estates, was capable of that absolute freedom, hath since been fancied by some, I leave to the Arbitration of greater Polititians.
Onely this I am confident of, that no fair capitulation could have disobliged King James, who lay under too many doubts, and strong desires, to have refused so peaceable an entry as he found, upon any lawfull limitations; manifest in the advice given to his Son; Wherein are more Popular rules, then himself was ever observed to follow.
By the vast quantity of teares let fall from the Multitude upon his Grave, may be noted, how far easier it is to find pitty, then protection, Though his friends if united, would have proved the major part. Who for want of a good head-piece to follow, this universall affection, like floting Atomes, made onely a world [Page 224] of Calamity for himself and his party. But this blow past recalling, set the peoples teeth so much an edge, as all the Queen did after, was thought bitter, and her Government too peevish and effeminate for so warlike a Nation: Nor did she decline lesse in the opinion of the Court it self, no counsel daring after to appear, but what was sutable to the Cecilian gusto.
Here may be noted, with what Circumspection Princes ought to play their Game, since Counsellors, their Card-holders, are not seldom Cheaters, and intend more particular Interests then their Masters: As appeared in the remove of Essex, a man thought farre more necessary to the Queen's Service, and Englands safety, then such as purchased his ruine. The banding of two factions, being the most probable way to keep, this already superannuated [Page 225] Princes from falling into contempt. For such Commands, as under both parties would have been readily obeyed, were after one had got the absolute disposure of affairs, wholly neglected. Essex's return (which no question would have been indeavoured, upon the least discontent of her Majesty) appearing of so dismall a consequence to his enemies, as nothing might procure it, was thought safe, or what did obstruct it, dangerous. Nor was it possible for this planet, so neer its declension, to Influence another party: None daring to run the Hazard of an unavoydable future Ruine upon the contemplation of a year or two's power; which was more then her age, and present weaknesse did in any probability promise.
This proves, it had been the Queen's better policy, to have conceded the Life of the Earle to the [Page 226] teares, and vowes of the people, through which their Love had not onely been preserved intire, but (what was next considerable) so great a restraint put upon the contrary Cabal, as might contain them within the compasse of Obedience; out of fear she should have let loose this Lyon, who to that end she might have kept in the Tower, his death not being probable, as her Subjects stood affected, to have countervalued the advantage of his Life. And this oversight was the more inexcusable, because the Ancestours of the Earl's chiefest enemies had by the same arts rendred her ungratefull to the People of England, in a like case of severity towards the Duke of Norfolk.
Nor did she apprehend till it was too late, the wound given her own Power, through the mediation of the Hangman in the death of Essex; [Page 227] Not being able ever after, to moderate the Insolency of those, that now did not stick to slight her, and story openly in her ears the necessity she lay under, to declare the Scotch King her Successor, lest the Parl. should be (for their own safety) compelled to do it themselves; which had not been omitted, but (as I have been told) to endear King James more to some particular families, of which the most noble for birth, found afterwards little cause to applaud their Designe. Neither were other reports wanting, which being usuall at the Death of all Princes, I shall here wilfully omit, as quite unsatisfied of their truth. Nor had I said this, but that there hath been from the beginning of the uncivill wars (wherein none were masters of what they had) diverse imperfect Copies of my own hand left in the custody of one did print some of them, under [Page 228] a namelesse Author, though very false, And might have done this, if not timely prevented.
Nor did this blow terminate only in the ruine of the Earls friends, but extended to the disadvantage of his Maligners themselves, apparent in Sir Walter Raleigh, who wanting Strength, though not Wit to be the treasurers Corrivall, Perished because not thought to own humility enough to be his Servant: it being more safe at Court to have many Enemies of equall power, then one false ambitious friend, that hath attained to the absolutenesse of Command. The agitations and tempests, arising from considerable factions in the houses of Princes, (resembling some winds at sea, by which men are driven though by contrary means, to one and the same end) would of necessity have miscarried, or perished, had any single party prevailed. The one [Page 229] still thinking it honourable to preserve and advance what the other esteems safe to suppresse and destroy. And this Raleigh was often heard to say, he did not apprehend, Before his Genius had dictated it to him, as he came in a Boat from the execution of the Earl of Essex, which was done at the Tower. Nor could the wisest of his endeavours free him from the dire effects of this Portent, or to name it more properly, a necessary cause of such events, as did after befall him.
The Death of Essex like a Melancholy cloud, did shade the prospect of her peoples affection, from being so discernable at the shutting of her dayes, as it was during the Dawning and Meridian of her reign. Yet if Essex had been try'd by a Peerage of Angels, they would have passed a like sentence upon him, or exposed Monarchy to contempt. [Page 230] Wherefore Prudence cannot lay the fault at the door of her Justice, but the ill-management of her Mercy, as not knowing how to imploy it, towards the best advantage of her future Affairs. But after an Impartiall Reflection made, in reference to private persons averseness towards any apprehension of defect, we may possibly learn to wonder, why she made no better provision against contempt, till that hower a meer stranger to this Princess, who had all her sails continually fill'd with flattery or success.
Now to vindicate her Majesty from the obvious aspersion I have so often heard her prudence upbraided withall, (for neglecting the Italian mode quite, in the removall of Mary the Scottish Queen, and Dowager of France, so much the more undecent, as the hand of a Hangman is less honourable then that of a Physitian.) I may say, That since those, [Page 231] who for their own sakes as well as their Soveraigns, thought it not safe to be left undone, wanted the skil or spirit to do it a clandestine way, i was more discretion then folly to refuse ejecting one so uncouth herself; such a lesson being easier learned then forgotten, & might have been afterward practised to her personall disadvantage.
And if reports on all hands were not mistaken, little thanks is due to those who made the Nation accessary through this solemn Try all to the Death of her mother they meant next to set up. Nor can an undoubted desire in the Scots to have her removed, the better to facilitate the Succession of their King (who did more indulge his Patience then Honour, in passing unrevenged those houses, sprinkled by her blood) justifie their discretions, that could not but know all Obligation was more likely to be lost in the shame, then [Page 232] found in any gratefull acknowledgment of such actions as these. And if their Posterity taste of the like Justice, they may sacrifice repentance to such nets, as themselves spread to insnare this Queen first, and then Essex; the fault of the last being in reference to the Innocent driving on the designe, as far below such severity, as the majesty of the other was above it.
Nothing commends the goodness of Queen Elizabeths reign more, then that she and her Subjects should have one and the same Minion, as happened in Essex: whereas the hatred of the people, proved after an undoubted consequence of her Successor's Love, remaining no less confident of the choyce of the one, than diffident of the others. The Queen wanting no medium to nterpose between her and their fury: from whence grew a confidence, [Page 233] that she would not countenance an unworthy man. Neither was it a small advancement to this general complyance, that the people appeared not at the cost to raise him. It being the custom of this thrifty Prince, to let her Favorites taste, not surfet, on the wealth of the Nation, conveying her Largesses by Spoons, not Buckets: The names of Monopolies, and extrajudiciall Taxes, not being intelligible to experience all her days. Neither were her ears stopped against her peoples complaints, ever thought by her just, and so fit to receive a present redresse; the cause her Parliaments were no further inquisitive then she was pleased to informe them.
Had her Successor retained the like Moderation, the power of our Representative had never fallen under the malleation of so extensive a dispute, which hath raised mens [Page 234] minds up to so impetuous a Billow, as it is questioneble, whether that which supported her power, may not through a contrary application utterly ruine those may succeed. Queen Elizabeth being not onely fortunate in her conduct at home, but able to diffuse peace and plenty over such Neighbour-Nations, as she was advised by true Reason of State, to maintain in strength and good plight. Not suitable to the late practise of a Prince, that first brake with Spain, then France, and after was hardly restrained from kindling a fire in the Netherlands, which lyes in a manner in the bosom of England.
Now I should conclude here, but that I find Sir Henry Wotton (late Provost of Eaton, and a long time before Ambassadour with the most Illustrious State of Venice) hath published a Manuscript amongst his [Page 235] friends, and may since be made more generall; where he offers to compare the Duke of Buckingham with the Earl of Essex; much to the disadvantage of the latter, who laying this action by, did never own the doing any thing so ungratefull, as might make him fear the Anger, or beg the favour of a Parliament, much less owe his Life to the dissolution of one already called. He is not charged with many deeds of Improbity, unless Women be cast upon his account, not in Justice to be done, the other standing by. The awe he bare to the Religion then Professed was discernable by his Death, which in the Opinion of many, reached something below the Garb of a Souldier; so busie are Criticks (that like Flyes spare nothing savours of Fame or Infamy) to the Grave it self.
That he was thought no instrument [Page 236] of Tyranny or Oppression, appears manifest, in the Monument of Love, remains still undemolished in the hearts of most Englishmen: whereas the Duke retains the generall tincture of, &c. Nor can his well-known bounty to Friends and Servants expunge it, because drained from the people, or taken out of the publique Treasure, if not from the generall safety of the Nation. Whereas Essex obliged his Confidents out of his own store, or by other so innocent wayes, as the Subject had no just cause to be scandalized at it.
The Earles Naturall parts were as good as the Dukes, his Learning and Birth higher, the one being of an honourable, the other at best but of a Gentile extraction. Nor can so inconsiderate an Action, that in charity rather deserves the title of a Riot then of a Treason, come up to so [Page 237] great an Ingratitude and Indignity to the Nation, as Buckinghams proceedings at Rochell, calculated after the French account, the summe of which I leave for more voluminous Pens to cast up; onely I shall assume the boldness to say, That the Duke shewed no less folly in accumulating so great a hatred of the people, then Essex did in mis-applying their Love. And if his shadows were left exact to posterity, he was not behind him in handsomness, the sole and primary cause of Villers advancement. Onely in this Essex came short, in having a Mistresse would be attentive to Reason, from whence soever it came, whether through the Organs of Friendship or Malice. Whereas the Dukes fortune depended on two Princes, That in reference to their own weakness or his strength, remained deaf to all complaints else, but what were presented [Page 238] through his own mediation, or those of his Creatures, with which he was ever made first acquainted, under no slighter a penalty then his displeasure, so much more heavier then the Kings, as his memory was better, and Interest more.
Concerning their Deaths, I can attest, the Dukes did occasion no less joy, then the other did sorrow, not matched by the saddest accident did happen in Queen Elizabeths reign; No not if her Death be cast in, though deplorable enough, as I have often been informed by those did approve the Sentence, but not the so suddain execution of it. Nor was the Hangman reported to be willingly hired to do it, whereas Felton seemed to be Inspired by some Daemon, if not the Genius of our Nation.
This had not been said, but in vindication of that, I never found [Page 239] cause yet to question the truth of, and to unwarp their judgements (if any such be) that may be drawn aside, by the goodness of Sir Henry Woottons parts, in knowing mens opinions, much contaminated by his too over-zealous celebration of this Man, as may be easily found in the Records of Parliament, to which I refer the Reader, together with what I have in this behalf written.
Some Advantages may be deduceable from Court-Factions.
IT may be thought I hope no less impertinent, then what went before, if according to my rambling Method, I shall drop some conjectures in reference to a benefit may redound to the Subject from Court-factions: All which in conclusion will reach the Prince, who cannot be safe and happy, if his people live miserably; Not likely to be avoyded, where preferments depend wholly upon the mediation of a single and uncontroulable party. In which case the oppressed have no power for the present to appeal to. The cause our later Parliaments have been pestered with Clamours and Complaints, seldom, if ever heard of in the Golden [Page 241] dayes of Queen Elizabeth. And from whose root sprung those branches of misery, by which the greatest felicity any nation ever injoyed, is become over-shadowed, so that the detection of corruption in Officers, and the gratification of the malice of some, and Ambition of others, in their expulsions and Punishments, gave them at last the boldness to question the integrity of the Crown.
Divers persons of equall authority, though both wicked, do in experience produced more justice then a greater probity in a single Individuall, hath been (at least in these depraved ages) heard to pronounce: For though Bribery cannot be denyed a deflourer of equity; yet remaining more palpable in referencd to detection, it may not happily be of so bad a consequence, as the effects of the more uneasily detected propensities, found to follow the [Page 242] inclinations of love, fear, or hope: as it is easily deduced from the practise usual in private families, where a great advantage accrues to the first Delator, and prejudice to the party accused; It not lying in the strength of vertue, if in any agility of defence, to keep a person immaculate from the blurs of Calumny, for want of proof, or an indifferent ear, which superlative powers cannot be at leasure to afford. Nor is the advantage to be drawn from two equall Cabals, better discerned, then by comparing the tempers of King James his Parliaments with those holden under the Queen; for the first, being wholly led by a single and passionate affection to one Minion, lived to see: never a tolerable Minister relating to the Crown, or any in Authority so resolute, as not to prefer the Favorites Command before his Masters, as esteeming the frown of the [Page 243] last more deadly. Now the huge rate set upon places of Judicature, taught Judges to sell their votes, and people to complain: Who by devouring of Instruments, came at last so well acquainted with their own strength, as not to spare the principall, and first cause. One Concession ever crouding room for a greater, if not a more unreasonable demand. Whereas such instruments of State as Queen Eli [...] beth had use of, being strained through the double and contrary Interests of a divided party, no vertue was excluded, or vice admitted, any way beneficiall, or of prejudice to Prince or people; contrary to the custom of later times, wherein the most probable designs were pinched and miscarried, through the smalnesse of their parts were imployed to keep them on foot. No more solid Reason appearing in the advancement of the most, but Mony or favour; [Page 244] As no question will be found instanced in a prodigious number of examples, when time shall have purchased impunity, for the manifestation of truth; not so likely to have proved the result of a divided Court, where the creatures of one were the enemies of an other, no lesse powerfull; and so they both became lyable to accusation, or capable of defence. And from the sparkles of this clashing, not onely persons and actions, but the Queens Councils came to be refined from the rust and Cankers, that after grew through the corruption of forraign coyn, no less currant at Court all my time, then pieces of two and twenty shillings, Jacobuses themselves. Now though Monarchy may (whether out of perfection or defect I shall not here dispute) make use of this Recipe, it seems dangerous, if not mortall, in reference to a freer [Page 245] Government, where the least siding is a step towards Tyranny: the weakest part being as apt to call, as a potent neighbour may be to come and assist, upon so advantagious an errand. All disparities or contentions, but meerly rationall and in reference to an universall welfare, tending to popularity and disunion, wherefore above all things to be avoyded. Nor is any neer dependance upon a forreign Prince, more mighty then themselves, compatible with Liberty: Which renders lending of vast Summs little less dangerous then borrowing. And through which the Catholique King may one day attain Genoa; it being naturall to all Creditors to favour their designs that owe them mony, in hope of Payment; and so become Traitors to the generality, out of the desire of a particular reimbursement. Such folly lyes in many Citizens, as they preferre [Page 246] destruction in grosse, before the hazard of their private Interests.
But when Power is Monopolized in a single person, Faction can be no more spared, then an eye or an ear. Kings for the generality, out of Ignorance in the world, if not for want of wit, or too much Flattery, being unable to value what they give or receive; or whether they gratisie or depresse vertue or vice, especially if they have no other information, but what is deduced from a Minion, whose judgement is no less clouded through Pride, then his is by affection, and a supposition of worth and abilities not really present; Such Servants owning contrary interests to their Masters, who by bearing the charges of those follies they daily commit, do not seldom prove Banckrupts themselves of all ought to be esteemed dear in Soveraignty.
Nor are those single Trustees of [Page 247] the Royall assent, found by practise so impartiall in the distribution of rewards and punishments, but that they diminish by the first, no less their Princes Love, then they augment in the latter the peoples hatred; which an even debate would so far Moderate, as to give such satisfaction as might preserve the generality in obedience, by nothing so soon forseited, as a continued succession of cruell punishments, and unjust Censures. I remember after Felton had given the fatall blow to George Duke of Buckingham, one Savil, a lusty fellow, formerly burnt in the Shoulder for a Rogue (finding how acceptable the news was, where ever it came) gave out, he was the man that did it: And that though an honourable persons brother, he wanted mony to convey him away; upon which he was apprehended, and though not worth a groat, fined a [Page 248] considerable sum in the Star-Chamber, to which, the wisdom, equity and justice of that Court, added (because they wanted power to hang him) this Corporall punishment, viz. That he should be whipped from the Fleet where he lay prisoner, to the Pilory in Westminster-palace-yard, there to be for two hours nailed, & after to lose one ear, have his nose slit, and then to be branded in the forehead; all which, as long as the bowels of humanity would give me leave, I looked upon: Nor was this more then half his punishment, as much being to be done to him in Cheapside, but that (as I heard) the King more charitable then his Judges, did pardon it; Though his perpetuall residence in Bridewell was not remitted, till for another thing (some thought unlikely to be done under such a restraint) he was hanged at Tiburn. I had not touched upon [Page 249] this, as relating to a time which none can remember without being agitated by envy, or grief: but to acquaint posterity, with the opinion of a Lord, looked upon as the wisest for counsell, (however he might have failed in reference to execution) in his time: Who at dinner that day with some of the promoters of the fore-mentioned Sentence, said, that though he hoped it would never be executed, yet it grieved him, a president of that high nature should remain upon record, no less to the dishonour of their Mercy, then the Justice of his Majesty, upon whose scoreit might not unpossibly one day lye heavy: Nor did it scape the notice of the next Parl. as any may find, can procure a sight of a book written by Regall autority, wherein the Subject was prohibited so much as to name a Parliament, &c. But the conclusion of the fore-mentioned [Page 250] prudent Lord, was to prove, that of all punishments death was soonest forgotten; whereas Whipping and Pilory were alwayes remembred: from whence Governours may observe, That the greatest Cruelty is exercised by Subjects have had their foundations laid in pitty. Nor can this digression be thought impertinent, by those shall consider, that such exorbitant and unnaturall repetitions of Punishments, were strangers during the domination of two equall factions. Through the percussion of which, like Flint and Steel, all things came to light, which these pleas might advance, or Eclipse the glory of the Prince.
Nor should I prosecute this Epidemicall mischief of Favorites, at this time common with France and Spain, but to answer such as plead for it: Whom I have heard so impudent, as to alledge the example [Page 251] of our blessed Saviour; and no lesse foolish in citing the autority due to the Prudence of Italy, where no Pope lives without a Nephew: Forgetting the whole management of the Church was not left to Saint John; nor the wise Conclave swayed by his Holinesse Kindred, who being incircled on all sides with enemies, and destitute by reason of his elective honour, of any hereditary friendship, cannot in Reason provide better for his safety, against the dangers have for many Ages waited upon the Table and Cup of the Pope, then by raising a person to so high a dignity about him, as may transcend any preferments likely to be offered by an enemy. The cause he that is stiled his Nephew, values his preservation equally with his owne. And he that shall [Page 252] yet seek further satisfaction, may finde it in the unhappy management of such Princes affairs, as have suffered themselves to be ingrossed by Minions, taken onely upon the bare recommendations of their private Affections.
It is the condition of those in Power to be guided by Servants.
THey say of the Whale that she is steered in her course through the guidance of a far smaller Fish, and a lesser then that is reported to alter the Naturall gale of a Ship; looked upon as wonders in the deep, though few things are more usuall and Familiar upon Land. All our State-Leviathans being so far guided by their Servants, Wives, Mistresses or Favorites, that in a true sense there is no Monarchy, all things for the most part succeeding according to the perswasions of others, if not contrary to the will of the Prince: A Mischief not to be quite obviated, but at the perill of falling into Obstinacy, (as great if [Page 254] not a more prejudiciall extream) nor hath any King under my experience, been able to drive on his Affayres, without grating upon one of these excesses. So as a Nation like that of Egypt, is not seldome governed by a Stranger or a Jew. There being no such thing in an unlimited sense, as an Absolute Government, or if possible to be found, it must be in that as improperly stiled Free. Which proves there is no reall Liberty, or Power totally Arbitrary, in the nature of Things. For though the Incomparable Prudence of the State of Venice, hath compounded for most of the errours committed by the Senators of Carthage; And Queen-Elizabeth shunned the greatest Rocks of Tyranny (though as free from compulsion, as ever any Prince stood;) yet the Jurisdiction of either was as remote from being purely or totally Absolute, as [Page 255] the condition of their Subjects is uncapable of the name of Freedom. They being both too inestimable Jewels to be intrusted with passion, single, and without any mediation from Counsell or Law. I confess the Grand Signior can strangle whom he please; but it is seldom done at his own suit, no more then any desert is gratified: I my self have known many, so far Strangers to what was convenient, as they would scarce concede or deny any thing, out of the presence of their Secretary. And this proceeded not seldom from a distrust there was no cause for: Manifest in the Earl of Somerset, who though himself owner of a competent sufficiency, was so Inchanted with an opinion of Sir Thomas Overburies parts, that he preferred him from a Servant to such an intimate friendship, as he could think nothing well-educated [Page 256] for imployment in his Office, that had not passed his Correction, nor secret safe laid up, but in his Bosom: which swelled him to such a Monstrosity in pride, that I have heard (not being my self then neer the English Court) how he offered to rant at his Servants, and did once beat the Coach-man; for putting his Commands under an inferiour expostulation to his Masters. And through this intolerable arrogance in him, and remissness in the Earl, the sparks first flew, that kindled the ruine of them both: friendship being no more able to maintain its interest against a feminine Affection, then so great a Pride was to confine it self within the tedder of Moderation. The Minions of my time (an epidemicall mischief over all the great Nations of Christendom where Monarchy swayes) did, during that Fortune, so far transcend [Page 257] their Patrons felicity, as they could gratifie all the rest of their Passions (quite exempt from fear or danger) being screened from both by the person of their Prince, whom in reason they ought to defend; It having been often averred in my experience, that all the Kings I have known, were found to do more for their Favorites, then they could be tempted to have done for themselves. Which may serve for a proof of this Assertion, ‘that the greatest are not Free, but led intriumph by the Affections of others, through the mediation of their own,’ by which means Women come to Govern, and Children to dispose of Common-wealths. And thus the hand of Providence, though steady in it self, doth out of a desire to appear various (and so more beautifull) not onely remove the great men, but the paunes so occultly, [Page 258] in this huge Chesse-board of the world, as they seem to our giddy apprehensions, to be dandled in the Lap of a contingent Successe. Though good or bad Luck are meerly Imaginary, like the Articke and Antarticke Poles, on which the world, as on the two ends of an Axletree, are feigned to depend. Wherefore the apparent Reason why great men are ruled by more obscure fools, is want of Judgement or Sufficiency. The hidden Justice of God upon the Nation in generall, or persons in particular, who are naturally unworthy through disobedience, or have rendred themselves so, by a Male-administration of Affairs: The cause their Power is shared with meaner People, first sought to in all Suits incident to their Places. And this Custom hath brought into such [Page 259] credit amongst men, as forgetting how much it savours of weakness, they labour to make it Necessary in the Court of Heaven. As if God were more Importuned, or less affected by our immediate Addresses, then when we offer'd our Prayers through the intercession of the blessed Virgin, or some other Saint: Consonant to a Memorable Answer to a Catholick, made by King James, ‘That the Ruler of all things was not subject to dote like him.’
Yet wise men Govern in their own persons, as Ioseph is said to rule Egypt; for had not his Servants used to afford more obedience then advice, so dishonest an action in outward appearance, could never have passed without expostulation, as the putting the Cup in Benjamins Sack. To end this Discourse, nothing plausible [Page 260] ought to be referred to a Servant's dispatch, nor that whichis less Popular done by a Master; since he that is used to rake in dirt must imploy an Instrument, lest the filth should stick too apparently on his fingers. Thus Princes juggle by Confederacy, whilest meaner men rule in their own persons.
FINIS.