Gods wonderful mercy in the mount of woful extremity. Or, the recovered captive Being a plain relation of Gods unspeakable goodness in rescuing one of the meanest of his flock from the paw of the roaring lyon, and pangs of unconceivable horror through long and strong temptations and spiritual desertions. Published 1. For the encouragement of poor distressed consciences, worried with temptations, and almost quite wearied with waiting. 2. For a caution to secure sinners, lest they also come into such or sorer torment. 3. For a call of all (in whose hearts are the ways of God) to bear a part in the high praises of him whose wonders are in the deep. By Charles Langford.

The Captive delivered, Or a Relation of the great things which the Lord the mighty God of Heaven and Earth, did for his poor Servant C. L. in delivering him out of the midſt of violent and dreadful temptations. April. 16. 1669. witneſſing to his Soul the greatneſs of his mercy in the midſt of his ſins, and magnifying his free-grace in ſealing it with the comfortable perſwaſion of his being one of Abrams believing ſeed, and this when under great unworthineſs and unbelief, all which he now deſires in thankfulneſs, and according to his vows in the day of his diſtreſs to declare to the people of God, and to as many as ſhall read it.

CHAP. I. Of the Original cauſe of all troubles, what ſhare the Authour had therein: Why ſeeing all men are by nature the children of wrath, do not all thus feel the weight of it, the particular occaſion of his firſt awakening. Satans deſign in it. Gods over-ruling and turning it to good.

VVHen I conſider the ſad eſtate wherein all the ſinful Sons of Adam lye, how (through the moſt righteous judgement of God for our wilful tranſgreſſion of his holy Law, (which he gave for a rule and tryal of our obedience) miſerably they are deprived of a moſt bleſſed eſtate. Gods Image and bleſſed preſence, once had and enjoyed, and how dangerouſly depraved and ſwollen up into an enmity againſt God their Maker; their nature is: I am ſo far from wondring at the horror that ſometimes here and there one is ſurprized withall, that I muſt confeſs 'tis a far greater wonder to me that any are found to live at eaſe. Dread and horror are the beſt fruit that can be had for eating of the forbidden tree. If meer juſtice ruled the world the thickets would be every mans habitation: Magor Miſſabib might be the fitteſt name for Adams race,Jer. 20.3 fear round about. now degenerated into a brood of vipers. 'Tis a wonder ſin hath not found out and frightned the ſinner upon earth, that caught him in and caſt him out of Paradice. If it ſpared him not there, how ſhould it paſs him by here: if it turned him out of his walk, his moſt delightful walk with the God of bliſs there, why hath it not tumbled him down into a bed of fire • ere? ſure I am ſorrow, and diſtreſs of conſcience is as much an attendant upon ſin and guilt, as the ſhadow is of the body, as hear is of the fire, as dark ſhadows were of the night by this the children of the day are tranſformed into thoſe of the night, and the heirs of God into haters of God, and children of wrath, and ſuch are all men without exception in a natural condition.

Theſe conſiderations make it leſs to be wondred at I ſay, that any man ſhould groan under the burthen of ſin which lyes ſo heavy upon all; it being a far greater wonder, as I ſaid before, that the juſt, holy, and righteous God ſhould ſo long ſuſpend the execution of the antient ſentence paſt upon Adam and his poſterity, or that any of the inhabitants of the earth, ſhould not ſear their dropping into Hell, and dread their danger.

I, for my part, muſt (to the honour of my ſtrong Redeemer) take to my ſelf the guilt of that firſt tranſgreſſion, and acknowledge that from the loins of the firſt Adam hath a venemous empoiſoned nature been conveyed unto me. Let no man ſay or think that any part of my paſt miſery ſprung from any other fountain then this evil nature. I know that amidſt the numberleſs number of Satans artifices, this is one of his main engines, whereby he would keep poor captive ſouls from the ways of life and peace. He labours to bring up an evil report of ſuch ways, repreſenting religion as the great incending as well in the Conſciences as in the Kingdoms of Men, and with as much confidence avers it as wicked Ahab did of the good Prophets that profeſſion of the Goſpel attended with it's required ſtrictneſs is the grand trouble of the world.1. Kings 18.17. Inſomuch that I think 'twould be no miſtake ſhould I affirm this for a certain truth. That Satans furious attempts made moſt what, upon the inward peace of Goſpel profeſſions (who having eſcaped the polutions that are in the world through luſt, and committed the keeping of their ſouls into the hands of an able preſerver) are not allwayes raiſed by him in hope of bringing them back into their former bondage, or undoing their ſouls by deſperation. But that he may ſtir up a greater diſlike in the hearts of his Vaſſals to the ways of purity. Offences are the trade that Satan ſets up and drives. The miſeries of us are the mirth of him, But woe to him by whom they come, and woe to the world becauſe of them. Let the Reader know for a certain truth, that however carnall hearts conceive of the way that is called Holy, branding it by the names of melancholly, mopiſh and m • d wiſdom is juſtified of her Children, all her wayes are wayes of pleaſantneſs and all her paths are peace, Prov. 3.17. carnal and ſenſual delights are not in the leaſt to be compared with ſpiritual and divine, Pſ. 46.4. the River that makes glad the City of God is more deep more durable, more delightful; then the Egyptian Nilus; the waters of Siloam run but ſoftly, the conſolations of God found in the way of holy obedience make no great noiſe in the ears of common obſervers, who are meet ſtrangers to ſuch joyes, but they are therefore the more deep and ſolid. My long experience hath taught me in the midſt of all the intricacies of providence to hold this for a certain truth, that godlineſs never took away any mans peace, nor ungodlineſs never gave it▪ The cloſeſt conformity to the commands of God never did any man harm, nor did the pleaſures of ſin ever do any man good, the wiſe lord of all hath thought fit to train me up under many ſpiritual afflictions and ſore temptations, I am now arrived at the borders of Death through age, of much of my part life may I truly ſay in the words of the diſtreſſed Pſalmiſt, that in it my Soul hath been full of troubles, Pſ 88.3. by reaſon whereof my life hath oft drawn nigh to the grave, yet in the greateſt of my extremities, have I ever ſeen a real-worth in holy ſtrictneſs, ſuch a worth have I ſeen in that; that I may truly ſay, not it, but Satan taking advantage of my want of it, was that which did me harm, the bitter cup of external, internal or eternal evils receiveth it. Fulneſs from an evil nature, a naughty heart, whoever is employed in the filling of it, the fountain for fetching of it is within our ſelves; deſtruction when it cometh as a whirl-wind, ſuddenly, ſurroundingly, and on every ſide, ſo that to determine from what particular point it blows may ſeem impoſſible, yet muſt it be granted that its ingendring was in the deep and deadly Caverns of an earthly and an evil heart, whatever inſtrumentallity, Men or Devils have in the infliction of our troubles, our deſtructions are undeniably not from them, but from our ſelves. Oh! then let none ſay or think that 'tis Religion, but irreligion; preciſeneſs, but diſſoluteneſs, drawing nigh unto, but departing away from, the living God, much reading, praying, hearing, ſearching the Scriptures, conſorting with the godly, &c. But the contrary, have been the cauſes (though the other ſometimes the occaſions) of helliſh horrors and diſquietneſs of mind. Rom. 7.8.11. Oh! no, no, 'tis ſin that is the root of bitterneſs ſpringing up into troubles? a ſinful nature, a ſinful life, or the leaſt ſinful omiſſion, any one act of ſin though never ſo ſmall is enough to infuſe that horror into the ſoul that all the pleaſures of time ſhall never be able to claw off.

Thus that ſinful nature, which I brought along with me into the world, and by which (as ſoon as I had attained to my ripeneſs of years I began to manifeſt whoſe child I was bringing forth ſuch fruits whereof I am aſhamed: This I ſay was the root of all the bitterneſs I have hitherto taſted of, 'twas not too much preciſeneſs, which the enemies of true Godlineſs falſly ſo call, that wrought this diſturbance in me. For at the time when my troubles began I had neither affection to, nor acquaintance with; any other way of ſerving the God of heaven, then what was common carnal and external.

Q. How then comes it to paſs that the whole Earth, upon the matter lyeth ſtill, and is at quiet not troubled themſelves with ſuch ſtrange kind of doubts, fears, and diſtractions of thoughts about their Eternal ſtate as you ſpeak of, nor troubling others with their complaint about them? Sure, coming too near the heels of Religion, is the cauſe of ſuch fractions of the bones of inward peace, or elſe why ſhould not others be thus perplexed?

Anſ. I anſwer that however the Objection is manifeſtly rooted in the minds of carnal men, who by reaſon of their fondneſs of their falſe peace, not willing to raiſe diſturbances within themſelves, like no worſhip of God ſave that which biteth not, but contrarily bite and devour ſuch as do yet ſo falſe and ground leſs is this Objection that in few words I ſhall only ſay.

1. That however tis true (de facto) that, moſt of thoſe who ingage in the ways of God meet with great troubles and diſtreſs of conſcience at the firſt entrance, yet (de jure) no ſort of men are more the ſons of conſolation than they.

2. Such diſtreſſes are moſt needful: moſt profitable things, and ſuch as commend the wa • es of God above all others. For conſider.

1. How elſe ſhould the heart of man who (by nature) drinketh in iniquity as a thirſty man water, be put out of his ſeeming▪ delightful way of ſinning, 'tis the way that Heaven hath pitcht upon to ſave men from Hell, this to acquaint them with the bitterneſs of ſin here.

2. How elſe ſhould the heart of a ſinner be prepared to entertain the terms and tidings of a Saviour, Chriſt believed in, Chriſt relyed upon, Chriſt owned and embraced and ſubmitted unto,1 Tim. 3.16. is one of the greateſt miſteries of Godlineſs in all the world, and nothing prepareth the heart more to hearken to, and embrace the tidings, the tenders, and the terms of ſo ſweet a name as Jeſus is then ſpiritual diſtreſs ſouls weary and heavy laden, Mat. 11.28. and none but ſuch have to do, or will have to do with Ieſus Chriſt.

3. How ſhould the Law of God be found powerful to kill, or the Goſpel of Chriſt powerful to quicken any other way.

We read of Gods magnifying his word above all his name 'tis his aim, and delight to do ſo, he will have men to know his word to be a word of power, an inſtrument of life or death; a two edged ſword, and therefore not to be jeſted with, and the ordinary way of effecting this, is, by raiſing the benumbed Souls of ſinners from that natural Lethargy and carnal ſecurity that lyeth upon their whole inward man, underſtanding, will, conſcience, affections, the Soul, and all that is within the Soul of an unregenerate perſon ſtandeth not in awe of divine precepts, promiſes, or threatnings till awakened by divine power. God may ſpeak once, yea twice, yet man perceiveth it not, until in a dream, in a viſion of the night. when deep ſleep falleth upon men, in ſlumberings upon the bed, then he openeth the ears of men and ſealeth their inſtruction▪ Job. 33.14. &c. 'tis uſually ſome rough dealing that is required to rouze the ſinner out of his pleaſant but falſe dreams of peace. Sometimes he is chaſtned with pain upon his bed, and the multitude of his bones with ſtrong pains ſo that his life abhorreth bread, and his ſoul dainty meat. His fleſh is conſumed away that it cannot be ſ • on, and his bones that were not ſeen ſtick ou • , his Soul d • aweth nigh to the Grave and his l • fe to the deſtroyers. Thus God ruineth and tortureth Sinners into the way of Life, & maketh room for the Meſſenger, the interpreter the One among a thouſand to ſhew unto Man his uprightneſs. verſes 20.21, 22, 23. Mount Sinai's terrible thunderings did not more powerful make way for the reception of the Law, then the conviction of ſin by the Law, doth for the embracement of the Goſpel, and the embracement of it for the ſettlement of inward diſtractions.

In a word. The wounds of conſcience, plainly ſhew not only the power of the Law by which ſin is ſtrengthned, armed, and enabled, to work death: but alſo the power of the Goſpel in ſetting poor diſtreſſed Souls at freedom from The Law, Sin, and Death.

3. 'Tis a moſt ſenceleſs imagination to judge any mans perſon or way to be the more excellent becauſe leſs troubleſome in it.

By this crooked rule the unbluſhing forehead of an Harlot may paſs for an hopeful ſign of her future happineſs, the Bedlam may boaſt of his better condition then others becauſe he feels not thoſe prickings of pins and needles which if others had they would cry out of. And yet

4. How many inſtances have the records of time given us of the confounding terrors that wicked men on the ſudden have been overwhelmed with? how oft may it be obſerved how God diſtributeth ſorrow to ſuch in dreadful meaſures, and how from the heighth of cenſuall delights God caſts them down into deſtruction how are they brought into deſolation as in a moment? they are utterly conſumed with terrors. Pſ 73.18, 19. God hath appointed a day wherein he will make known his wrath upon all the veſſels of wrath eminently. And this is called in Scripture, Rom. 25. The day, The great and terible day of the Lord, The day of wrath. But alas how few fear this becauſe tis future? the heart of man fears not wrath to come though no wrath like it. Things preſent affect moſt. And the Apoſtle hath told us why, becauſe ſuch are blind, and cannot ſee afar off. 2 Per. 1.9. But now let ſuch remember, the ſtouteſt ſiners have been unhorſt and periſhed even in the very way. God puts not off all to the g • eat and laſt deſires, he hath his petty feſſions ſometimes., ſome are tormented before their time. They fall into the hands of a loving • od when they little thought of it. Job. 21.17. How oft is the Candle of the wicked put out. Gen. 4.14. Who would have thought that that heart of Cain which feared nothing, ſhould ſo ſuddenly be ſmitten with the fear of every thing! Dan. 5.6? Or that Belſhazzar who juſt now could boldly bid defiance to the God of Iſrael; ſhould upon the firſt ſight of what he underſtood not, be ſurprized with ſuch an helliſh fit of quaking? Ch. 4.32? Or that great Nebuchadn • zzar now feeding his fancy with the ſplend our of his own works; and ſwelling himſelf into a conceited Deity, ſhould in the ſame hour, yea while the word was in his mouth became as a Reaſt? v. 37. How eaſily can God abaſe ſuch as walk in pride? ſhould the Lord commiſſion our own thoughts againſt us no need of any other enemy to make us miſerable, and this he hath often done, as in the caſes already mentioned. Stories both ſacred and prophane afford us a large account of many more • ragicall overthrows of the enemies of holyneſs. And few ages paſs without ſome drops of wrath • mminently falling upon the heads of one ſiner or other which (were we but wiſe to conſider them) would fully inform us that Gods dealings with his Saints and ſervants in deſertion of comfort and permiſſion of Satan to agonize them in this world. However it ſeem tedious and tireſome for a while, and they apt to ſpeak, as once Job did, he teareth me in his wrath who • ateth me: he gnaſheth upon me with his teeth. Yet weighing in an equall Ballance theſe dealings of God with his Children, with thoſe earfull cruptions of wrath that ſeize upon the • ngodly, and it will ſoon appear, that the wayes of God to his people are not ſeverity but lenity, not fury, but mercy, tender mercy and loving kindneſs.

Thus diſtreſs o • conſcience is not ſo concomitant to profeſſion of the Goſpel (as the enemies thereof feign. Luke 15.7. but that ſometimes it may be found among the jovial crew of unrighteous men needing no repentance, and whenſoever it falleth upon ſuch, it is much more lamentable then that which is let out upon poor, humble, bruiſed, obedient Sinners. Becauſe when the Lord riſeth up ag • inſt the Souls of thoſe that hate and forget him, he comes.

1. With greater fury. Pſ. 11.6. An horrible tempeſt is the portion of their cup. Iſ. 54.8▪ Now when he troubleth his Children for ſin he hideth his face from them in wrath, but then it is but in a little wrath, Hab. 3 2. and his wrath makes him not at any time to forget his love, he can remember that in the midſt of it ſtill.

2. With ſewer advantages, there is leſs hope of ſuch a ones recovery.

Diſtreſſes of whatſoever ſort are like violent purges to the body, preparatives muſt be had, or elſe a body full of humors and unaccuſtomed to ſuch means is beſet with dangers, who knows which way dreadful convictions of divine diſpleaſure may drive the amaz'd and affrighten'd Soul? 'tis poſſible to God, but very improbable to man that he who hath hardned his own heart againſt God and his fear, and been forging arguments, and ſtudying offences, and picking quarrels againſt the ways and worſhip of God, ſhould ever take to thoſe as his proper remedy in times of temptation. Satan will do all he can to keep up a diſlike in ſuch a One againſt thoſe things that make for true peace, or if peradventure Satan be caſt out of the outward converſation; and the man ſeems to recover his peace by a partial reformation, yet how truly hath our Lord ſet forth the doleful doom of ſuch half begotten Chriſtians. Mat. 12.33, 34, 35. The latter end of ſuch is worſe (for ſin and ſorrow) then their beginning, wounds skinned over will become ulcerous at laſt, the ſting of the old Serpent (like that of the Ta • antula) diſpatcheth this kind of ſinners into hell laughing.

5. Moreover, the proper time of diſcovery is not yet come, judgement paſſing before the laſt act is ridiculous • olly.

Mark but the end of wicked men, patiently ſtay but a very little while; and tell me then what you think of all their pleaſures. Follow them to death or at the furtheſt to judgement, then will the blackneſs of their countenance, and the loudneſs of their howling cryes confirm the truth of that paſſage; now, little thought of. Eccleſ. 8.12.13. Though a ſinner do evil an hundred times and his days be prolonged, yet ſurely I know that it ſhall be well with them that fear God, which fear before him But it ſhall not be well with the wicked. He that ſeriouſly layes to heart the ſure and ſore miſeries that come ſtealing on upon the ſinful, ſenſual, merry world, Ez. 32. And how even they who have (Pharoah like been ſtout hearted oppreſſors, and reproachers of the diſtreſſed remnant of Jacob, though they have cauſed their terror in the land of the living, are nevertheleſs gone down to hell and how heavy their iniquities ly • upon their bones, I ſay, he that obſerves theſe things and layeth them to heart will find there was a reaſon for Balaam; wiſh. Num. 3.10. L •• me dye the death of the righteous, and my la •• end b • like to his. Heb. 11.24. And that Moſes was 〈◊〉 child when he refuſed to be called the Son 〈◊〉 Pharoahs Daughter, chuſing rather to fuſſ •• affliction with the people of God, then to 〈◊〉 joy the pleaſures o • ſin for a ſeaſon: eſtee • ing the reproach of Chriſt greater riches th • the treaſures of Egypt, to ruſh upon the po •• of ſufferings when a man may chuſe, to account pleaſures to be no more then preſſures, reproaches to be renown, and treaſures to be but traſh. Oh! what folly doth the world judge this to be? and yet ſuch a fool was Moſes, and ſo muſt he be, that would be wiſe, 'tis the higheſt wiſdom to ſhun thoſe ſhort pleaſures that breed long and eternal pains, an eternal weight of glory will make afflictions that are but for a moment ſeem but • ight and little when heavieſt and greateſt, 'tis this, the end, the duration of good and evil that wiſdom conſidereth, before it beſtows it's names on any thing. And oh! that men were wiſe in this, to employ their thoughts more upon the end of their way, and the wages of their work, then upon the way and work it ſelf, then would not the preſent delights of ſin make the life of a ſinner to appear delightfu • ; becauſe ſuch pleaſures are but for a ſeaſon, the pleaſures are but falſe and fading, but the torments are true and eternal ones.

We are told concerning Witches that the Devil appeareth not to them in any terrible ſhape at the beginning of their contract but in the ſhape of a man and with many fair promiſes of wealth, long life, and power to revenge their wrongs, with many pleaſures beſides. That the hook being bid, it may go down the better, 2 Cor. 4.4. were but the ſeals of ignorance (by which the God of this world blinds the eyes of them that believe not) taken off, the life of ſinners would quickly prove a weary life, and the Miniſters of Chriſt who now are wearied with ſilence, would find work enough to anſwer the queſtion, Acts 11.16.30. Sirs what ſhall we do to be ſaved.

There is but a thin ſeal over thine eye and that will not alway there abide. Death or the day of judgement will ferch it off. And when that drops, all thy comforts drops away from thee; ſin will find thee out, then, be ſure no place ſhall priviledge thee from its arreſt. Iſ. 32.2. To be found in Chriſt will be the beſt hiding place and covert from the Wind and Tempeſt. Sions heights, and ſhews of holyneſs will ſtand in little ſtead, when, Iſ. 33.14. The ſinners [in Zion] are afraid fearfullneſs hath ſurprized the hypocrite: who among us ſhall dwell with the devouring fire? who amongſt us ſhall dwell with everlaſting burnings? ſincerity. reall Chriſtianity will be the beſt Religion then: when ſhews and ſhadows ſhall flee away. Then they that fear God, walk in darkneſs, that are wounded in ſpirit, laden with the ſpirit of heavyneſs, whoſe faith of adoption lyeth open to manyfold temptations, troden underfoot of Men, and not ſp • red by the rod of God: theſe, theſe I ſay, then will have a merry day: a day of redemption from ſears, and deliverance from every particular of their complaint. Mark well, Mat. 4.2. But unto you that fear my name ſhall the Son of righ • eouſneſs ariſe with healing in his wings, and ye ſhall go forth, and grow up as Calves of the ſtall. Ch. 3 17. And they ſhall be mine ſaith the Lord of hoſts in that day when I make up my Jewels and I will ſpare them as a Man ſpareth his own Son that ſerveth him.

Let all the world then know, that if the unchecked pleaſures of time be attended with eternall diſpleaſures, there is but ſmall reaſon why any man ſhould become ſins advocate becauſe of that pleaſure that attends it, concerning which that may as truly be ſaid which St. Iames aſſerts concerning the life of all Men. What is it but a vapour, which ſoon appeareth and preſently diſapeareth, leaving its poſſeſſor • n an interminable irrecoverable gulf of diſmall horror and confounding diſtraction?

This is the fifth branch of my anſwer to • hoſe that think the troubles of mind which • arnall profeſſors are freed from, is an argument ſtrong enough to perſwade men from intermedling in the ſtricter and purer wayes of holyneſs: Eternity is before us. Mal. 3.18

Then ſhall ye return and diſcern between the righteous and the wicked, between him that feareth God and h • m that feareth him not.

6. Let me alſo add this; that as all Gods people are not ſo happy as to enjoy the heighth of aſſurance of the love of God without fits of intermiſſion ſo neither are they alſo miſerable as to be caſt into the depths of terrors the belly of Hell, without hope of comming thence. Or, this is that I would ſay, depths of terrors among profeſſors is altogether as rare as heights of aſſurance. 'Tis but a few that fall into ſuch temptation as may render them the wonder of others. The rod of correction is as needfull among Children in a family, as bread its ſelf: and of this all that belong to God are one way or other partakers: but to be whipt with Scorpions, to be chaſtned in wrath or rebuked in hot diſpleaſure, is a thing rarely to be ſeen among the thouſands of Iſrael.

7. Thoſe whom God thus puts upon the wrack of unuſuall • errors have none to thank but an evill nature in themſelves and that evil • One that is in the world.

The razor that he ſhaves his people with i • an hired one: Iſ. 7.20. Acts of puniſhment ar • called ſtrange acts. Iſ. 28.21. God hath none that he thinks fit to own. Sin and Satan, tis that he muſt blame if any thing; the one for procuring the other for promoting wrathfull dealings againſt the Soul. All this while God and his ways are free.

8. Though the juſt God ſhould lengthen the chains of the devouring Lyon ſo far as that grace and peace ſeem to be loſt for ever: yet the purpoſes of God to preſerve his Elect ſhall ſtand faſt for ever.

Such is the wiſdom power and love of God to his own that though Satan hath an allowance to diſturb them yet ſhall he never be able to deſtroy them. All his labour ſhall become fruitleſs, and his thoughts but vain. The over-ruling power is ſtill where it was. God (that I may alude to that of the Apoſtle) never ſends forth any ſingle-warrant againſt his people. If the Devil, Gods ſervant, be at any time employed upon a meſſage to tempt, to trouble, to buffet: God hath ever ſome meſſenger or other at hand commiſſioned to ſupport, to comfort, to ſuccour and ſave his endangered ones: 1 Cor. 10.13. this double warrant beareth an equal date, and holds an equal pace. This may very well paſs for one of the wonders which are wrought in the deep.

In a word. God fruſtrates the councels of Satan, turns his furious attempts into tokens of favour, overſhoots him in his own bow, makes that ſerve for a means of converſion, which was intended for nothing but ſubverſion and perdition.

I hope the Reader will not account me impertinent in all that is here ſaid. My deſign is (oh that I were able) to do all the miſchief that may be to the Kingdom of darkneſs, I mean, the wiles of the Devil, whereby he endeavours to repreſent the ways of open ſin, or formal Religion, as the onely pleaſant way and deſirable to walk in, becauſe not obſerved to trouble its Paſſengers with fears, doubts and diſtreſſes about ſpiritual and eternal things.

To all which give leave to ſum up my anſwer briefly, which is this.

1. The ways of God are the only ways that give a true right to ſolid peace and comfort.

2. Sometimes the ways of God may not aford that joy which is deſired, but then 'tis both needful and gainful to have it ſo.

3. 'Tis ſenceleſs to imagine any Mans perſon or way to be the better becauſe not troubled in it.

4. And yet no age wherein God doth not viſit ſome one or other of the ſtouteſt of his enemies with confounding terrors.

5 But the beſt time to judge whether ſtrict piety, or diſſoluteneſs, and formality be the moſt undiſturbed way will not be till time is at an end.

6. There are but very few of Gods people, that are under long and ſtrong diſertions.

7. All that are ſo find cauſe enough to charge their preſent ſufferings upon their former ſinful ſecurity, and the Devil-their enemy but to acquit God and his ways.

8. Whom God ſuffers Satan to rage violently upon, he ſends help unto, and turns all into good.

This laſt particular is clearly exemplified in Gods dealings with my ſelf at the firſt.

It pleaſed the Lord who drew me out of my Mothers Womb to lay upon me a violent ſickneſs, and that in the days of my ignorance and while under a meer natural and unregenerate ſtate, as I ſaid before, in which ſickneſs (being a Feavor) God, who is rich in mercy, began firſt to fri • hten my ſecure Soul into ſerious apprehenſions of its eternal concerns. I had under that diſtemper clearly, to my apprehenſion, heaven in its glory, hell in its miſery and confounding torments ſet before me, and (which was that, that filled me with anguiſh) I lay under ſtrong apprehenſions of Chriſts forſakings, and that my portion lay in that lake of fire, this made ſo deep an impreſſion upon me, that to this day I ſtill retain the memory of it; nor could any thing but wonderful grace in God have freed me from the terror of its remembrance. To what a fearful ſtand ſuch impreſſions muſt needs bring poor Souls poſſeſſed thereby cannot be expreſſed by me, nor underſtood by any one who is a ſtranger to ſuch paſſages within his own breaſt, only this I muſt declare, that ſuch was the dread and horrour that then I lay under, ſo ſtrong the deluſion of the Devil at that time, that Satan made no ſmall advantage thereof in the whole courſe of his temptations.

This way which God was pleaſed to uſe for my firſt awakening out of my natural eſtate, wherein I never dreamed of any danger at all; gives me occaſion to ſpeak a word to theſe three things.

1. The nature and uſefulneſs of ſuch means. 2. The deſperate deſign that Satan the common Enemy hath in them. 3. The merciful over-ruling hand of God that appeareth therein for the fruſtration of Satans malitious deſign and the furtherance of his gratious purpoſes for his elect

As to the firſt of theſe, I would have none to underſtand me as if I took ſuch occaſions and accidents to be a neceſſary or proper inſtitution for revealing a mans condition to himſelf. Such things may not be called properly converting Ordinances, they have no ſufficiency of • heir own to beget any ſaving apprehenſion of the miſery of ſin, and excellency of Chriſt.

Nevertheleſs God can and doth many times make uſe of ſuch ways as preparatory to the Miniſtry of Chriſt by the Goſpel. Acts 9. As in the caſe of Paul, ſuch providences may aſtoniſh, confound and fetter • he ſinner, and by fear bring him into a willingneſs to entertain the meſſage of the Goſpel.

The preaching of Faith; is the ſetled, fixed, • nſtituted means to convert and free the Soul from its fears.

God ſpeaks not by viſions and Revelations, Heb. 1.1. but by his Son. His Ordinances not • rovidences are the means of grace; yet ſo as • hat the one may make way for the other when • nd in whomſoever he will.

2. Touching the deſign that Satan hath in • hoſe tumultuous diſquietments raiſed upon ſuch occaſion, I have learnt that among the reſt theſe are ſome of the principal ones that he mainly in ends.

1. Preſent overthrow, utter ſhipwrack, and deſtruction of all hope, he would daſh and ſplit the ſoul againſt the rock of damning deſperation.

2. And as a conſequent thereof, help on the bodily diſtemper, dry up the humours of the body by the hurries of the Soul, and ſo if it be poſſible drag the Soul laden with fears and not yet relieved by faith before the ſeat of judgement where he that believeth not is ſure to be condemned. Jon 3.18.

3. Or if this fails, by recovery out of ſickneſs, then his deſign is, to make ſuch wearied ones willing to caſt off all thoughts of that which ſo much troubleth them in the remembrance of, and glad to flee to the pleaſures of ſin to ſeek for a Remedy. He hopes by that heavy hand of temptation which lyeth upon them to draw the natural principle of ſelf-love to a compoſition, and rather then remain a cloſe priſoner in ſuch bondage, to change it for a Vaſſallage to one of theſe common principles of Hell.

1. That there is no ſuch thing as Heaven nor Hell, 'tis a meer fixion, and therefore but a meer folly to trouble our ſelves about them. Or elſe.

2. Tis better for a Man to take his ſhare in the pleaſures of the fleſh, allowing God and our ſelves ſo much ſervice and care as our Forefathers and others have done. And not concern himſelf ſo deeply in the affairs of eternity. If I am elected I cannot be damned; if reprobated not ſaved.

To theſe or ſome ſuch priſons the Devil ſhifts ſouls wearied with terrors. And it matters not him much in which they are, may he but be the keeper.

4. Or laſtly if all theſe fail yet Satan hath a further deſign. If he find, that the Garriſon cannot be won by ſtorm; that ſtill there is a reſiſtance made againſt all his attempts. He cannot drive the ſoul to utter deſpair of mercy, or to yeild its members ſervants to divers luſts and pleaſures. Yet nevertheleſs he hopes that the breaches, the wide gaſhes, that he now makes, may be a way for entrance in times to come. That a long life ſhall not be able to make them up again; he knows that upon every falling into ſin he ſhall have a f • ll blow at the ſoul thus troubled; and that the greatneſs of the doubts now raiſed may prove a mighty impediment to the hearts cloſing with Chriſt by faith.

This laſt have I found moſt true in my own caſe. This firſt deluſion miniſtred much ſtrength to every following temptation.

3. Satan the great enemy intended nothing but my final overthrow▪ not the leaſt good, but the greateſt evil, and yet ſhall I here make bold to tell the world how much I ſtand bound to fear the Lord for his goodneſs, in delivering me and diſpoſing my fears for good. For.

1. As ſoon as it pleaſed God that my body recovered out of its diſtemper, I lay under much trouble by reaſon of the great fears before men •• o • ed and this made me ſeek out for ſome advice now for my wracked mind. And acquainting that bleſſed Man of God Dr. 〈◊〉 with my trouble he gave me to underſtand that i • was a meer deluſion of Satan.

2. I found i • my ſelf ſerious thoughts of my eternal ſtate, of Heaven and Hell, attended with endeavours to ſeek the one, and avoid the other.

3. And I ſound not only the Lord comming i • by his b • eſſed ſpirit with conviction of ſin: but alſo re • ſing in my ſoul an high eſtimation of his love and favour.

4. I found my ſelf ſtirred up to pray. God enabling me by his bleſſed ſpirit therein, ſo that now it might be ſaid, as once of Paul, behold he prayeth. I could then have ſpoken to God as one ſpeaketh to his friend.

5. Open profeſſion of the truth of the Goſpel followed hereon. Gladly bearing the reproachful name of Puritan, which was the name in faſhion in thoſe dayes to revile profeſſors withall.

6. Prayer in my Family was ſet up alſo by me when young and unmarried.

7. Former ſins did not only diſlike me but alſo former pleaſures and paſtimes. As Bowling, and Cocking, &c. And.

8. Aſſociation with the godly was my delight, the Men that feared God were the Men of my choice but eſpecially with much content did I embrace acquaintance with, and was much helped by one Mr. The. Hibben of Rowton above others, a Gentleman eminently worthy for profeſſion of the Goſpel.

9. Frequent was my attendance upon the word preached. Often went I to Brompton Brrian to hear that holy Man of God Mr. Peirſon. So that by this time methoughts I could diſcern a work of God wrought in me whereby I found the new Man as well as the old.

10. Going to Brompton I not only foun • much help for my Soul by the Miniſtry of the word but it pleaſed God alſo to bring me into acquaintance with a noble Family eminent in thoſe dayes for Religion Sr. Robert Harleigh. Out of which he gave me a meet helper, both for body and Soul.

Here was the firſt conflict wherein Satans malice was over matched by the ſuper-abundant grace of God.

CHAP. II. Victory in and over temptation matter of admiration Satan diſappointed in particular temptations. Doth not ceaſe them, but ſuſpend them. Security the unbeſeeming conſequent of ſpiritual deliverance. The Mother of more and greater miſeries. Satans Art may vary, but his Aime that ſame the writers experience herein.

WHo can but admire the Wiſdom, Might, and Mercy of God clearly manifeſting it ſelf in holding up poor weak and worthleſs Man under any one of all thoſe heavy conflicts he hath with the powers of darkneſs? Oh: what policy? what power? what poiſon? is every ſtratagem of the Devil managed with▪ all? how doth that evil one ſet his All at work that poor Man might be caught, kept, and confounded by him at once. And that temptation might not riſe up a ſecond time.

But ſuch is the heart of God towards Man in miſery that he ſtands not by as an idle ſpectator of our ſufferings; but teacheth our hands to war and our ſingers to fight. He makes us to underſtand what we could hardly believe. 2 Pet. 2.9. That he knows how to deliver out off temptation. That there is no deſperate caſe with him. That our unbelief cannot render the faith of God of none effect. 2 Tim. 2.13. That though we believe not yet he abideth faithful and cannot deny himſelf, ſuch may be the anguiſh of ſpirit and cruel Bondage under diſertion that (as the Children of Iſrael could not hearken to the words of promiſe ſpoken to them by Moſes. Exod. 6.9. Though no condition more needing it, ſo) faith of Adoption may be much decayed, the Breaſts of promiſe may not let down their wonted conſolations. The Soul ſeemeth to be in a languiſhing condition by reaſon of its diſſability to imbrace the promiſes. 'Tis brought to its wits end, come to the utmoſt of faith and patience. And yet for all this, our God abideth faithful he cannot deny himſelf, he is the only wiſe God.

And a Saviour of ſuch as are gone to the utmoſt end of faith, ready to drop away into total unbelief. He that can but place Affiance in God the Saviour; though God hath not planted Aſſurance of Salvation in him; may yet abide confident of deliverance. Dwell in, ſtay thy ſelf upon God, by this faith: and thou ſhalt find the want of Aſſurance may damnifie but cannot damne thee. Mark well that paſſage of the Pſalmiſt, Pſ. 91.1. He that dwelleth in the ſecret place of the moſt high ſhall ledge under the ſhadow of the Almighty. Give him the honour of his being The moſt high. And Almightineſs ſhall be thy defence.

Truſt in his mercy and thou ſhalt not need to tremble at his power. But remember (ſaith bleſſed Mr. Bradford) it muſt be ſuch a truſt as may be called a Dwelling. Here you muſt ſtay, here you muſt abide, not ſuffering your Souls to be outed by violence of temptation, nor voluntary giving up the poſſeſion.

• is a wonder (I ſay again) that when the wind of temptation blows high and ſtrong: Pſal. 62.9. Poor Man, lighter then a feather, lighter then vanity, ſhould be any note found. Or that grace ſhould ever be able to ſhew its head when fiery ſcorching heats of temptation ſmite the heart. Yet ſo it is. The ſecret of the moſt high is a place above all deſtructive ſtorms; the ſhadow of the Almighty is no Jonahs Gourd, but a thick, a ſafe ſhelter from the ſcorching beams of temptation, the fiery darts of the Devil. Wait on the Lord, oh: my Soul! hope in his mercy! here ſtay, here wait, here dwell in waiting! let no force nor fraud of Hell perſwade thee to depart hence, and thou art ſafe for ever.

I have ſhewed already how Satan miſſed of his deſign which he had upon me in his firſt deluſion. He would have had me (being greatly afrighted at the thoughts of Hell) to give up my hopes of Heaven, and as a means to effect that did (to my apprehenſion) preſent to my view the Lord Chriſt departing from me. This he did whiles I was under bodily weakneſs, from which God mercifully ſet me free. But as I ſaid before, and find ſince, by long and lamentable experience, his malicious purpoſe in that deluſion did not end when the terror of it was abated. His practice upon me ſo filled my thoughts for many years after that it wonderfully hindred me from receiving my Lord Chriſt in that faithfulneſs as I ſhould have done. He departed from me ſo as that the violence of his temptations were nothing ſo great as in the time when he firſt was let looſe upon me: but ſo much of them ſtill ſtuck and ſtaid behind, as did make me drive on but heavily in the wayes of God, filling me with many ſlaviſh fears and doubts, and thereby making my cloſure with Jeſus Chriſt upon the offer of the Goſpel the more difficult; and his own entrance at another ſeaſon more poſſible and eaſy. The Lord indeed gave me a gratious deliverance, but Satans war with poor ſouls is not ended after the firſt battle. His hopes are that that fort which is not won at firſt onſet may be conquered at laſt. He was not out of hope of finding a fitter ſeaſon to renew his temptations againſt Chriſt, the head, though he found he had enough of him in the firſt Combate. Luke. 4.13. The text ſaith when the Devil had ended all the temptations he departed from him: for a ſeaſon.

How little doth the thoughts of this affect our hearts? we are apt to fall aſleep as ſoon as the fit of trouble is over; as if our enemy were afraid to ſhew himſelf any more, or as if his ſecond attempts would be no worſe then the firſt, or we our ſelves in a better poſture for reſiſtance. Whereas there is nothing more true then the contrary, nor any thing more unbeſeeming a Chriſtian then to forget his paſt dangers or remit his dillige • ne and ſlacken his hand in ſervices of his God and his pretious ſoul. To grow careleſs negligent and ſecure after ſuch deliverances, or indeed at any time, Is

1. Sinful. 1 Theſ. 5.6. Let others ſleep as they will, Jeſus Chriſt will not have his people do ſo. Math. 26.41. To watch is a duty then which none more frequently enjoyned. A duty that carryeth much mercy in the bowels of it. A watchful frame will beget and maintain a praying frame wherever it is. And both together will be a good means, if not to keep off, yet (at leaſt) to keep up the ſoul under, the heavy load of temptation our bleſſed Lord who himſelf hath ſuffered being tempted, and is able to ſuccour us who are tempted: Heb. 3.18. Hath yet thought it fit to employ poor ſouls this way during their lucid intervals and quiet hours. Encouraging us thereunto by this. It may be a preſervative from entring into temptations. Watch and pray and pray, leaſt ye enter into &c. Math. 26.41.

2. A careleſs behaviour after deliverance is not only ſinful, but fooliſh. The folly of it appeareth in theſe conſiderations.

1. The Devil himſelf is not at quiet, he is rallying up his forces after every Conqueſt, he is renewing his war again with greater fury. What he doth in this matter he knoweth he ſhall gain nothing by but the fulfilling of his malicious and revengeful pleaſure in the downfall of our immortal ſouls. And ſhall he be thus active in a matter of ſo ſmall advantage to himſelf, and we remain ſtupid when the gain is an immortal matchleſs gain, and that our own gain too? oh how unbeſeeming! how fooliſh a thing is this? we may well collect how Satan takes his ejectments out of the ſouls and bodies of Men by the account that the Diſciples brought back to their great Maſter touching the ſucceſs of their miniſtry. Luke. 10.17. Lord ſay they even the Devils are ſubject to us through thy name. This was the return they made and the text ſaith 'twas with joy. Chriſt allows it to be matter of rejoycing becauſe hardly effected. v. 18. And he ſaid unto them I beheld Satan as lightening fall from Heaven. To be permitted to rule in man is the Devils Heaven. To be caſt out thence is a torment next to Hell. It is not more contrary to the nature of flame to move downward, then to that evil ſpirit to be removed out of his place in man: meer force, mighty force muſt fetch him thence. his fall is as the fall of lightening.

2. It animates and armes our enemy for a ſooner and ſorer onſet.

Satan needeth not ſtay long to find advantages againſt a ſleepy ſoul. The bed of ſloathful ſecurity will aford room enough for him, but none for Jeſus Chriſt.

And the onſet is like to be more ſore as well as more ſoon. Old ſores not healed, every touch goes to the heart. Cant. 3.1, 24. Ch. 5.2 &c. The ſpouſe had more a do to get • id of her ſecond diſertion then of the firſt, although victorious in both. Security and unwary walking in a time of peace when there is liberty and leiſure to fortify our ſelves, is but a ſorry poſture for ſuch eſpecially, whoſe enemies are upon the march. Of all enemies none carry greater dread or greater danger then thoſe that come on the ſudden. Gen. 49.17. As Dan (that Serpent in the way and Adder in the path) dealt with the men of Laiſh who dwelt careleſs, quiet, and ſecure. Judg. 18.7.10.27. So the Devil that old Serpent, the fiery red Dragon, abours to do with ſouls negligent to ſecure • heir ſpiritual peace.

In a word an heart ſo ſtupid after deliverance as not to be deeply and durably affected with its paſt danger, and future duty (of love to Jeſus Chriſt, and preſſing after a more diſtinct and full aſſured underſtanding of him) But contrarily walking unevenly or careleſly; muſt needs be a ſinful and fooliſh thing. For ſuch a frame of heart as this is inviteth a departing Devil to return. When holy dilligence and watchfulneſs will enforce an approaching Devil to depart. He rallyeth up his forces while we ſlight the purſuit: whereas in the hotteſt onſet reſiſt him and he will fly from you.

This was my own folly after my firſt deliverance. Sins and miſcarriages againſt my good God coſt me dearly. For after many years patience of God it pleaſed him to withdraw his preſence from me and caſt me in a more horrible pit of ſoul diſtreſs then I had known.

This ſecond violent impulſe of the Devil (though many years paſt between it and the firſt, and the way he uſed in them both were ſomewhat unlike) I now find to be no other then a more ſubtile artifice of his, aiming at the ſame thing. Which now to the beſt of my abillity I ſhall plainly declare.

It pleaſed the Lord to ſuffer the enemy Satan to break in upon my ſoul in ſo fearful a manner that he forced me to blaſpheme my God though unwillingly. And (taking the advantage of my weakneſs) laid another deluſion upon my fantaſie, perſwading me that I had betrayed my Lord Chriſt, and ſo cauſed my own tongue to exclaim againſt my ſelf, that my ſins were ſo great that I thought Judas's ſins were nothing to mine, and that I had overthrown the world

In this deluſion (the Lord ſuffering him, mine enemy, to have a ſtrong power over me) he preſented to me as though I had committed ſome bloudy murther (which afterwards he endeavoured to have had me acted) tending to revive and with greater fury to ſet on the firſt temptation; that Chriſt had forſaken me.

In all this he managed his deſign upon me ſo, that I apprehended the ſuggeſtion not to be of Satan, but of God, inſomuch that being asked who told me theſe things which I uttered with ſo much dread againſt my ſelf, mine anſwer was, that it was God.

By all this Satan took advantage to confirm his firſt deluſion, which indeed was no other then a forelaying the way for the better effecting of his accurſed purpoſe and practice aagainſt me. For in the firſt he acted as if it had been Chriſt: and now, the Lord permitting it for good ends, which at laſt he accompliſhed, ſuffered him to tempt me, and by that temptation to prevail ſo farr that my tongue ſpake ſomething againſt my Lord Jeſus and this ſin he made uſe of to perſwade me that now I was indeed forſaken of God.

I cannot ſay but that Satan might have been diſcovered to have been no other then Satan; that this impulſe was his, not Gods; if men under ſuch deſertions had not their judgements much darkened; for herein he acted like himſelf with violence and at unawares it was a ſurprize on a ſuddain.

Nor can I ſay but that I had at that very time hopeful ſigns of the grace of God within me, could I but have ſeen it. For it was not a ſin committed with full conſent of my will, or without horror. 'Twas my unregenerate part that was prevailed over onely. And ſo grievous was it to me that in my confeſſion of ſins to the Lord afterwards, I acknowledged that he might juſtly make me an amazement to Angels and men; and ſuch thoughts carried about me many years.

Nevertheleſs the hour of temptation being an hour of darkneſs, and the Lord permiting the enemy thus to prevail, and not only ſo, but alſo to aſſault me with blaſphemous thoughts, this helped forward my doubtings and raiſed fearful thoughts in me that the firſt apprehenſions I had of being forſaken of Jeſus Chriſt, were not the deluſions of the Devil but the certain perſwaſions of God, becauſe I thought now I had committed a ſin moſt anſwerable to it.

After certain days being under this ſad condition, it pleaſed the Lord to ſtir up the hearts of divers of his people to keep a day of faſting and prayer at the place where I lay, among whom was that bleſſed man of God Mr. Pierſon, who prevailed with the Lord for my deliverance out of the violent extremity of this temptation.

But alas: the ſting of that fiery Serpent, the Devil, in this deluſion had ſo far entred, that much pain and anguiſh remained ſtill. I could not get rid of many fearful thoughts ariſing from the remembrance of the ſin committed, and alſo from the credit I too much gave to that ſuggeſtion [that upon the diſcovery and bringing to light of this notorious ſin 〈◊〉 ſhould be a ſhame to all my Friends and to Religion, and be brought alſo to ſome ſhame • l end] which my deadly Adverſary (as 〈◊〉 ſhall ſhew in its place) by another ſtratagem would indeed have brought me unto.

My fears thus abiding and doubts growing on ſtill as though Chriſt bad ſorſaken me: and Satan with all his might labouring to carry on his deſign to ſpoil me of the comforts which the Lord had formerly given me: as I had oppertunity I would ſtill be ſpeaking to godly Miniſters and enquiring, whether the diſertion I lay under were not a final forſaking, and labouring to reſolve my doubts whether I had not finned that unpardonable ſin againſt the holy Ghoſt? all this while aſhamed to diſcloſe the ſin I had, as before, committed, it being ſo ſtrange a fin, and ſo damnified my ſelf by not diſcovering of it.

And from thoſe to whom I made known my condition I received ſome comfort, thenceforth I followed the preaching of the Word, conſtantly, entertained the Miniſters and people of God at my houſe, kept many days of humilliation and prayer for the pardon of my ſins, and through the courſe of about twenty years the Lord bare me up in his armes that I f • ll not into any great dep • h of continued •• rrors.

CHAP. III. He holds on his profeſſion. Walking remiſly und der long peace, is awakened by aflictions, more dangerouſly wounded with temptations, but mercifully reſcued.

NOw being ſo gratiouſly delivered out of the paw of the Lyon and Bear, from a firſt and ſecond combate with monſtrous deluſions: 'twas high time to begin to put on for aſſurance of the pardon of ſin. To ariſe and ak • the ſtaff of faith and hope in hand and march along after the Ark of the Covenant through this weary land, this wilderneſs of temptation, in which I had been led ſo far already. But many inward doubts and fears I had within me ſtill; faith though it held me up in the way of profeſſion, yet was it not ſo ſtrong as with others, it adminiſtred not an abundant entrance into the Kingdom of our Lord and Saviour. I could approve the things that are excellent: but wanted greatly thoſe conſolations of God, ariſing from the Faith of Adoption, which are the ſtrength of paſſengers through the vale of Baca.

Notwithſtanding my aſſurances of pardon were thus wanting, and I ſubject to re-enſlavement thereby, I held it my duty and ſafety to become partner with the people of God in all the divine ordinances and providences that ſhould be impoſed upon them, the ſence of which duty made me tye my endeavours with theirs to draw the Ark of the God of Iſrael to its own place. 1 Sam. 6.12. And although (like the Kine) went on lowing all the way yet (to the beſt of my underſtanding) I kept the ſtrait wayes of the Lord and did not wickedly depart from my God.

After the inteſtive broils of thoſe times were ſomewhat abated, and leiſure with liberty lay common for any man to be as good as he would. Though I thankfully embraced the freedom of the Goſpel as a ſingular favour from Heaven, yet I muſt confeſs (as matter of much ſorrow) that neither the many afflictions nor mercyes under which I was exerciſed, were ſo well improved as they ſhould. But contrarily I forgot to return to. God according to his benefits.

Not long after this I found my ſins growing to ſo great a bulk that I could not look up.

My former ſin began to grow freſh in my remembrance, and the Lord to withdraw the light of his countenance which I had now for a good ſeaſon, and in a good meaſure enjoyed, my communion with him began much to abate, and his rod of affliction, ſuch as I had not known before, began to ſmart upon my back.

In my former trials (then which I thought once none could be greater) I was not brought ſo near the brink of utter ruins as I was in this and what followed.

Firſt the Lord began to lay on a load of ſore and gauling afflictions upon my loines mainly. By bringing a day of ſilence upon his Miniſters from whoſe lips I had often received ſufficient drops of that water of life to quench the thirſt of my heart panting after God. And blocking up the ſolemn aſſemblies of his Saints, permitting things ſo contrary to my judgement to be introduced and added to his worſhip. Theſe together with ſome other heavy afflictions at home from ſome of mine own relations did ſo concur with my former tryals, that I now concluded more then at any time before God had withdrawn himſelf from me.

Hereupon he was pleaſed to ſuffer that cruel enemy Satan, that old Serpent to break in upon my ſoul with ſuch dread and terror that he made my body to quake upon my bed, ſo that I was fain to have one to lye upon me to keep me from ſhaking, thinking then he had an opportunity to accompl • ſh his helliſh tragedy (my ſelf being ſo abuſed by his former deluſions and ſtill entertaining thoughts that God had forſaken me) that curſed enemy to the moſt glorious and ever bleſſed God would have tempted me (as once Jobes Wife d • d her husband) to curſe God, and this he preſſed with much violence: but through the mercy of God was not able to accompliſh his wicked deſign though he ſeemed to me to affirm (with as ſtrong affirmations and as bloudy oaths as ever were heard from any ſwearing wretch) that I was damned; territ • ing me in the night with fearful dreams and viſions of a ſpiritual nature which were moſt dreadful to my apprehenſion • and not being be through the goodneſs of God) to make my tongue his curſed inſtrument departed for a ſeaſon as though he would have rented the Heavens and the Earth.

But reviving again his temptations, ſhe whom God had given me for a meet helper, fighting againſt him by earneſt prayer to Almighty God, and likewiſe many Chriſtian friends that came to ſee me, he now began to deſiſt and fail in that way, and therefore began to try another, viz. In relation to the former delution as though I ſhould do ſome murtherous act. And now ſhewing himſelf to be according as our God hath ſaid of him a murtherer from the beginning he with ſtrong temptations endeavoured to make me imbrue my hands in the bloud of my deareſt friend, who had been ſo helpful to me againſt his former temptations, which was moſt grievous to my poor ſoul, and fearing leaſt his violent temptation might have overcome me, I (being ſo much in his hands) deſired her that ſhe would withdraw her ſelf, telling her the temptation. But ſhe (ſomething amazed thereat) undauntedly lifted up her ſoul to the Lord by holy ejaculations, and reſolved ſhe would not give that enemy one inch of ground. But caſting us both upon the protection of the Almighty with a lively faith in the Lord Jeſus vanquiſhed the enemy at that time.

Yet this temptation continnued about two months, in all which time my poor ſoul being moſt dreadfully afflicted, I did again earneſtly deſire my Wife to get ſome company in the houſe by night, but having little help or comfort from others, ſhe the more unceſſantly acted faith and prayer until our gratious God had given us deliverance.

CHAP. IV. His ſtrugling under and againſt temptations. The means moſt uſed and bleſſed for his ſupport. Caſt again the fourth and laſt time into the furnace of fiery hot inſtigations to blaſpheme the means uſed and owned for coming thence. An happy iſſue.

ANd having now paſſed ſome five or ſix years ſince the laſt grievous viſitation all this time labouring for the pardon of ſin in the uſe of means appointed of God to get out of that ſad condition, wherein I was ſtill haunted with blaſphemous and horrible injections and curſed inſtigations to curſe and ſwear which that wicked enemy could not after his utmoſt endeavours bring any further then my tongues end. Now, I ſay, labouring under theſe temptations and making my condition known to my Godly acquaintance they affirming; that theſe were not my own but Satans ſuggeſtions, ſome comfort I had from them labouring in the word of the Lord and prayer. This was one good ſtay.

Making uſe alſo of thoſe bleſſed ſtreams flowing from the word of God, I mean the works of thoſe bleſſed ſervants of Chriſt who have laboured much in writing upon ſuch ſubjects. As namely Dr. Preſton upon the attributes (which I read above twelve times over) Dr. Thomas Goodwins Child of light walking in darkneſs. Mr. Bridges's lifting up of caſt down. Mr. Simonds his deſerted ſoul. And that pretious piece of that worthy Mr. Burroughs. Saints walking by faith without ſight and ſence. And Mr. Bax • ers thirty two directions, traverſing theſe books over, through the Lords bleſſing. Were a great comfort and ſupport in bearing up my ſoul againſt the enemies cruel attempts, and weariſome afflictions under which I ſtrugled, having no aſſurance of the pardon of my ſins, and lying ſtill under the guilt of that great tranſgreſſion ſo long paſt committed, and under many more ſince.

Moreover though I could not pray with a free ſpirit, yet, under all this heavy load, I ſtill followed the Lord by earneſt prayer that he would come and take away both guilt and filth of ſin, and deſtroy that curſed nature from which Satan took his advantage againſt me, and help me (though he tarry yet) ſtill to wait for him, in the way of his judgements.

And now publick aſſemblies (which were wont to be a great ſolace to me in my diſtreſs) being not to be enjoyed in that purity I expected, and the practiſe of the publique miniſters being ſo contrary to my judgement and conſcience, I neither could nor would upon any terms become a hearer of them; and thereupon did rather chooſe to expoſe my ſelf to the ſcorn and diſpleaſure of men, in keeping meetings every Lords day in my Family. Spending that day in prayer and praiſes, and as occaſion was offered, dayes of humiliation.

Theſe duties having moſt of them been my practiſe for many years, wherein I ſerved the Lord withall my might, though ſometimes under much dejection, about the beginning of April, my good God (through the purchaſe made by the bloud of his Son, that bleſſed ſeed of the Woman, through whom he had covenanted with out firſt Parents immediately after the fall to give eternal life) having (by earneſt prayer and interceſſion I humbly claiming this from the Lord that he would account and make me righteous, through that purchaſe and redemption made by Chriſt) now reſolved to take up and put an end to the quarrel which he had againſt me for all my ſins (yet to let me know my deſerving and to manifeſt a further work upon me) did ſuffer the enemy to break in again upon me in moſt dreadful manner. Charging upon me that one ſin as formerly named above others with ſuch violence and power. That I believe I was in as great deſpair for the time as ever man was. My ſoul, by that malicious enemy to mankind, being ſtuffed with all abominations of helliſh thoughts, injections, curſed inſtigations, with other baſe and abominable vile immaginations, he at laſt infuſed into me as much malice againſt my bleſſed God as poſſibly he could. I thought now I was utterly forſaken, living in expectation of nothing but the lower moſt hell, and brought now again almoſt to blaſpheme.

When I ſaw that I was in this moſt dreadful caſe, fearing I ſhould I have wilfully blaſphemed I could have been well content that God ſhould have damned me, and thrown m • into hell, fear of being over tempted and thereby to blaſpheme God made me weary of life. When my Wife would put me on to pray for a bleſſing upon my meat I did it feignedly being willing to be ſtarved if I could.

And now in this dreadful condition (ſo dreadful that I believe few Sons of Adam were ever in a worſe, that did not do the things that I feared, i. e. blaſpheme God and deſtroy himſelf) I ſay being in ſuch a condition, and the ſin ſo often ſpoken of, lying ſtill heavy upon me, and ſhame withholding me from revealing it for many years, it pleaſed God to over-rule my ſpirit that I ſent for a worthy Miniſter of Jeſus Chriſt who coming to me the day before my deliverance I acquainted him with that ſin which did ſo lye upon my Conſcience, and never was revealed before. Well remembring how holy David Pſ. 32.3.5. (who while he kept ſilence his waxed old through his roaring all the day long) did but ſay he would confeſs his ſin and the Lord forgave his iniquity. So the Lord the very next day came and ſet my ſoul at reſt.

The comfort and help that I found from my natural relations and friends this woful condition was none at all, but inſtead of pitty I met with reproach from many, only my dear yoke fellow was my fellow ſufferer, of whom I can ſay the Lord gave her to me for ſuch a day as this to be his bleſſed inſtrument of my deliverance, for when I was even diſtracted ſhe laid the glory of the Lord deeply to her heart, and did daily bring the word of God to my ſoul, reading with great dilligence the holy Scriptures. Which being done then powring forth her ſoul to the Lord with ardent affections and with a mighty faith in our gratious God who had manifeſted his great love to her in former troubles, the experience of which encouraged her to go on ſtill in earneſt and frequent prayer and expectation that the Lord would accompliſh the work of deliverance.

And upon the ſixteenth day of April, 1669. (a day for ever to be ſolemnized as glorious and honourable to the Lord by me his poor creature) ſhe, going on in her conſtant courſe of prayer, after ſhe had given the Lord his holy and reverend titles, uſing Moſes his arguments brake forth into theſe words.

My Father! my Father! what wilt thou do with mine husband? he hath been ſpeaking and acting ſtill in thy cauſe, oh! deſtroy him not for thine own glory. Oh! what diſhonor will come to thy great name if thou do it. Oh! rather do with me what thou wilt! oh! do with me what thou wilt, but ſpare my Husband, &c.

Thus laying hold of that word of God in the Prophet. With a lively faith (concerning your Sons and your Daughters, command you me and ſtriving mightily in prayer the duty being e • ded, the Lord immediately appeared: and then that Lyon of the tribe of Judah, that bleſſed ſeed of the Woman, that ſecond Adam, that promiſed Meſſiah, the Son of the living God who had formerly broke the Serpents head, he who in a ſingle duel had diſarmed the Devil in the Wilderneſs, t • od the Wine preſs of his Fathers wrath alone, this Jeſus the Saviour who knew how to ſuccour tempred ſouls) made hare his holy arm and his own right hand brought d • liverance, he delivered me from my ſtrong enemy and ſaved m • from him that hated me.

He that is pleaſed to ſtile himſelf a God, hearing prayer, and in moſt of his great works delights to advance his own power by uſing ſmall and unlikely means, after long tarrying and in▪ a time when I looked not for him, came now and owned his own ordinance, crowned the cryes and faith and patience of a poor Woman with ſuch ſucceſs, that my praiſe ſhall be continually of him. The proud m • y ſcorn, but the humble ſhall hear ther of and be glad:

That roaring Lyon, mine adverſary the Devil: that old Serpent; that red-Dragon; that unclean Spirit that Lyar, Accuſer, Murtherer from the beginning: that Apollion to the Geeck • , Abbaddon to the Jews, and deſtroyer to all (for as are the names given him by the word of truth, ſo is his nature, and ſo hath he laboured mightily for a long ſeaſon to ſhew himſelf in me) even now (when he thought himſelf almoſt ſeated in the p • ſſ • ſſion of his long ſought Dominion, and that there was no caſting of him out of my ſoul, which • e abuſed, making it his dunghil whereon he laid all the filth of helliſh thoughts and abominations that he could, wanting nothing but my will (that Fort-royal) to have put me under an eternal vaſſalage to his long laid deſig • s now, I ſay, was that accurſed enemy to God, and me, his poor creature, ſent to his own place, by my dear Lord Chriſt that holy Son of the bleſſed God, who took upon him my nature, that he might become my Lord and King; Saviour and Redeemer; who brake the doors of Braſs, reſcued me from the Rape of Helliſh furies, caſt them out, delivered my darling ſoul from the power of the Dog, and barred the Gate, that he could enter no more to ſtuff my thoughts with his deteſtable injections, although he attempted a return.

Thou haſt thruſt fore at me (oh mine enemy that I might fall but the Lord helped me many a time (may I now ſay) have theſe things afflicted me from my youth, many a time have they afflicted me from my youth, yet they have not prevailed againſt me. The Plowers plowed upon my back they made long their furrows, but the righteous Lord he hath cut aſunder the cords of the weeked one, I was brought low and the Lord helped me. He hath delivered my ſoul from death, mine eyes from tears, and my feet from falling.

Oh Lord my God I will give thanks to thee for ever.

CHAP. V. Concluding the whole experiment with an account of the unconceivable ſweetneſs of divine conſolations (the uſual conſequent of long and ſort temptations) a more then abundant reaſon to abide Gods leiſure under the heavy load of d • ſertions. Of the cauſe of writing.

ANd now at laſt when the Lord, my Lord▪ of whom the Father ſaid ſit thou at my right hand until I make thy enemies thy foot-ſtool • had ſet my ſoul at freedom by his mighty power, he ſent his bleſſed ſpirit, the holy Ghoſt, that moſt glorious ſelf evidencing and ſweet comforter, whoſe ſweetneſs no heart can conceive but he who hath taſted how good he is, who ſhewed me from the Father and his bleſſed Son, that all the miſeries afore mentioned, preſſing me down were the deluſions of Satan: and whereas he intended to have made me a ſhame and reproach to all that ſhould know or hear of my overthrow, that now my God hath taken advantage of the greatneſs of my ſins thereby to magnifie his mercy in pardoning thereof, according to my cry in the day of my diſtreſs; and that now I was of Abrahams Family, numbred among the ſpiritual Children of Abraham; a priviledge which I often, eſpecially under my troubles, prized highly and deſired earneſtly to be partaker off.

The bleſſed ſpirit bearing witneſs of theſe things, wrought in my ſoul ſuch unconceiveable joy, that in the words of Thomas I cryed out my Lord and my God, ſo raviſhing were the (kiſſes of thoſe divine lips of love that my heart was ſilled with joy unſpeakable and glorious, my mouth with laughter, my body (much weakened by the anguiſh and horror of my ſoul ſo that I kept my Chamber for many dayes together) was now revived, and my youth renewed as the Eagle that caſteth her Beak, ſo that I became as lightſome as if I had not known ſorrow, to the great admiration of my Friends who had known my long confinement to my Chamber by reaſon of ſorrow and heavyneſs. My heart, my ſorrowful heart, of which I was wont to cry out. None ſo fad, none ſo diſquieted as thou; was now (through the joy of the Lord) quite altered. The ſpirit of my God now covering me with the glorious robes of his Sons righteouſneſs turned my mourning into dancing, put off my Sackcloath and girded me with gladneſs, gave me a garment of praiſe, for the ſpirit of heavyneſs, ſo that then (and ſince being upheld by the ſame hand) I could ſay I carry about me a chearful heart, and a much more healthy body, notwithſtanding the great diſappointments I (in my worldly condition) then met with, and ſtill lye under.

Being now enabled by faith to apprehend my ſelf juſtified through the righteouſneſs of God, even the righteouſneſs of Jeſus Chriſt, imputeth to poor ſinners; the guilt, the obligation of my ſins to puniſhment, being taken away; I can now (through the tender mercy of God whereby the day ſpring from on high hath viſited me) comfortably give a challenge to Death and the Grave. Oh Death where is thy ſting: oh Grave where is thy victory? my dear Lord having ranſomed me from the power and fear of the grave, and helping me in deſpight of him that hath the power of death, that is the Devil to look upon my ſelf as one of thoſe whom God the Father hath given to the Son as part of the travaile of his ſoul, ſo that the Lord Chriſt delights in me as the gift of his Father and the purchaſe of his own bloud. And my God loveth me with the ſame love wherewith he loveth his Son and all the promiſes of grace made to ſinners in the holy word, through Jeſus Chriſt, I have an intereſt in, and expect to have fulfilled to me as far as it ſhall tend to his glory and my good. He that gave me his Son will freely alſo give me all good things.

Well may I therefore take up the words of the Prophet. Oh Lord I will praiſe thee for though thou waſt angry with me thine anger is turned away and thou comfortedſt me. For the iniquity of my ſoul thou waſt wroth with me and ſmot • ſt me but now thou haſt healed me, and reſtored comforts to me, the Lord Jehovah is my ſtrength and ſong he alſo is become my ſal • ation. I waited patiently for the Lord, and he enc •• ned his ear to me and heard my cry, he drew my feet out of an horrible pit out of the miry clay and hath ſet me upon a Rock and eſtabliſhed my goings. What ſhall I render unto the Lord for all his benefits. I will call upon him as long as I live. I will pay my vows unto the Lord now in the preſence of all his people.

When the Lord Jeſus is pleaſed to go away (to withdraw the comfortable warm beams of his love and preſence) from the ſight and ſence of his poor people. Joh. 16.6 (like the Apoſtles) their hearts are filled with heavyneſs, they think every day a week, and every week a month, and every month a year, the time ſeemeth tedious till he return, till he lifteth up the light of his countenance, till he reſtores comforts to them (like the mother of Siſera) they are putting forth their heads crying why are his Chariot wheels ſo long in coming? But oh that ſuch would remember (what I now find) that it is expedient for them that he ſhould ſometimes go away from them withholding his conſolations; for the holy Ghoſt the Comforter ſhall one time or other come to ſuch as wait for it with ſuch joy and peace that paſſeth all underſtanding of eye, ear, and heart of man. And then long time ſpent in waiting ſhall ſeem but a little moment, Iſ. 40 2. and they ſhall receive double pay for all the puniſhments of their iniquities.

The Children of this world (in this) are wiſer in their generation then the Children of light, no diſcouragement of wind or rain can make them forbear their ſeaſons of ſowing in hope, nor can the interpoſition of many perillous months delay, work a diſſolution of the hope that is conceived. Jam. 5.7. And yet the ground they go upon affords no ſuch footing for hope and truſt, as doth that of a Chriſtian; Mic. 1.6. how of have they ſown much and brought in little? whereas a Chriſtian (under all the improbabillities of outward ſenſible appearance) hath ſufficient cauſe to be confident of a plentiful harveſt. Under the furrows of dark providences lie the ſeed of faithful patient endeavours which ſhall ſpring up into light and joy. Pſal. 126.5. And doubtleſs they that ſow in a w • t weeping ſeaſon ſhall meet with a welcome harveſt. The ſmalleſt ſeeds of faith and patience, ſhall ſtretch into certain Sheaves of joy. When the earth over-wet with ſhowers is become a ſtanding pool who would adventure to beſtow his ſeed. Pains and patience had a • ſuch a time the Plowman calls imprudence. Be it what it will, ſure I am he never lyed, who hath pronounced Iſ. 32.20. Bleſſed are ye that ſow [the ſeeds of pious endeavours] beſide all waters [of deep and drowning afflictions] that ſend forth thither the feet of the Ox and the Aſs.

Venture then to hold on your way, keep hope and truſt a going in the paths of duty. Deep mire ſhall one day prove a fruitful ſoil to thee, and the joy of the harveſt, which is a ſhouting joy, ſhall ſo fill thy ſoul that many years of weariſome waiting ſhall ſeem no longer then the ſhorteſt night.

This calling to mind thoſe engagements which I had made unto the Lord in my low eſtate. viz. that if the Lord would deliver me. I would declare it to the Sons of men, and and whereas the wicked enemy had ſuggeſted to me that I ſhould be a ſhame to my friends and a reproach to religion, if the Lord would redeem my ſoul out of his hands then would I declare abroad the glorious and renowned works and wonders of the lifter up of my head, and what a great impoſtor, deceiver; deſtroying and lying Spirit the Devil this enemy to mankind is. Hereupon (having had help from God) I have adventured theſe few pages into the world, may the Lord inherit the praiſes of his people hereby, I • rall not value the reproaches of his enemies. May poor dropping ſouls underſtanding how Satan hath dealt, come to the ſight of the net which he hath laid for them, and be perſwaded to an holy conſtancy in reſiſtance I ſhall be much rejoyced in the ſucceſs.

Let the Lord do with me and it, as ſeemeth good in his ſight I have enough. My true Joſeph is yet alive, I hope ſhortly I ſhall goe up to ſee him, here I ſhall leave this Pillar of remembrance in the land of the living, it is mine.

Eben Ezer. Hitherto hath the Lord helped me.

A Poſt-ſcript.

BEfore I withdraw my hand, my earneſt deſire to promote the welfare of all men in generall, but eſpeacially of ſuch who (having given up their names to Jeſus Chriſt) lye under the furious aſſaults of the Devil that common enemy, doth mightily ingage me to ſpeak a few words more by way of humble and hearty requeſt. That man who hath obtained mercy and cannot ſhew pitty to others in miſery, is ſuch a monſter that hath no mention in the holy Scriptures, nor other reaſon then to call in queſtion whether his ſeeming deliverances be not real deluſions. I would gladly leave a teſtimony of my deareſt love to my Redeemer by laying out my once-doleful, now-joyful experience of inexpreſſible horror of mind for the benefit of three ſorts of Chriſtians eſpeacially.

1. Firſt ſuch as at preſent lye groaning under the heavy burden of a wounded Spirit • onging for deliverance. 2. Secondly ſuch as have once had experience of that ſad condition, but are now mercifully delivered. 3. Such as God hath dealt more gently with, not ſuffering them to fall into thoſe horrible depths of diſertion and temptation.

Into the hands of ſome or all of theſe 'tis poſſible theſe lines may come, and then my firſt and main requeſt (which I earneſtly beg) is this; that they would offer up at leaſt one freewill offering of thanksgiving to the mighty God of Jacob, the hope of Iſrael and the Saviour thereof in the time of trouble, when they ſhall read, what great things he hath done for me poor ſinner. My poor ſtock will never reach to furniſh the Alter with ſufficient Sacrifices of praiſe, oh help me by glorifying God on my behalf. As his mercy hath been abundant towards me: ſo oh that it might be abundant to the glory of him by the thanksgiving of many.

This being the generall requeſt I ſhall make a few more particular ones to thoſe three ſorts of Profeſſors briefly in order.

1. To the poor doubting diſtreſſed and almoſt diſtracted Conſcience.

Pretious Soul! my dear fellow and companion in ſpiritual tribulation! the purchaſe of the precious bloud of the Son of God! conformiſt to Jeſus Chriſt in his ſore agonies of temptation! whom the Devil envyeth, hateth, and ſeeketh to deſtroy! I know there is no condition under the Sun hath more need of pity and ſupplyes of comfort then this of thine. and yet I know no condition more rarely pityed or more hardly comforted, thy heart knows its own bitterneſs. Thou thinkeſt ſo much of this, that thou canſt reliſh no ſweetneſs in (and therefore wilfully refuſeſt) the Cup of ſweeteſt and divine conſolation. Oh poor ſoul! what weary ſome hours thou art made to poſſeſs, how tediouſly thy diſmal nights of terrors paſs over thee, and thou in them reduced to ſuch confounding ſtreights, that whither to fly from, or how to ſtand in the face of Gods conceived diſpleaſure, the Devils furious repreſentations, or thy own fearful apprehenſions, thou knoweſt not. Theſe things having been mine old acquaintance, I hope with freedome I may be permitted to beg two or three things at your hands.

1. That thou wouldeſt not let this mercyful dealing of God with my ſoul paſs without ſome thankful acknowledgement of thine. Lay aſide thy ſable weed a little, and cloath thy ſelf with the Garment of praiſe. Praiſe the Lord for his goodneſs and for his wonderful works to the Children of men.

Conclude not henceforth thy ſores to be incurable, nor Gods long ſtay to be a ſign that he will never come. Conſider what he hath done for me and let that put a little heart in thee to conclude, that 'tis good to continue yet in a waiting poſture, for ſurely he can and will at laſt do ſo for all ſuch as wait for him.

I know how apt ſuch a ſoul as this will be to varie the caſe, tempted ſouls ſhall never want arguments againſt themſelves nor skill to manage them while the Devil hath any. Thou wilt be ready to ſay the caſe is not the ſame with thee as 'twas with me. Either the ſin thou art troubled for or the manner of thy troubles ſeizing and the Devils handling thee under temptation, is not the ſame with mine. Something or other will be ſtill found as matter of objection againſt thy ſelf.

To run over particulars would be long. In a word thou thinkeſt, poſſibly, as once good David in another caſe that all men are liars, thy temptations may beget ſuch haſty expreſſions as to ſay▪ the caſe hath not been with others as they repreſent it; or to doubt their deliverance to be but feigned at the beſt, or elſe a ſhort parrole, a meet reprieve, not a diſcharge from the like or worſe enthrallment. Or if things have been truly related, it only proves what God can do not what Hell will do, as if the mercy of God did not bear an equal proportion with his power. Think of what thou wilt or canſt that may make againſt thee, and yet I ſhall continue to beg.

Give not up your hopes, hold on ſeeking after God you have not yet waited forty years, he will come in a time when you look not for him. Your caſe is not yet deſperate. 'Tis not ſo bad with you but 'twas as bad with me.

2. My earneſt ſuite is alſo that in ſtead of regarding dreams, viſions, voices, and other deluſions: you give credit to the un-erring word of God and oppoſe that againſt them all.

The generall drift deſign and ſcope of the book of God is to perſwade man, unbelieving man that God is mercyful. That ſin never damned any man yet, ſimply and of it ſelf: but as qualified by wilfulneſs, and unbelief. That though God be a conſuming fire a jealous God, yet fury is not in him. Iſ. 27.4. His jealouſie he puts upon him as a Cloak, a meer covering a looſe garment: and this he never puts on till provoked by the obſtinate refuſals of love and mercy. Even under the dark and terrible adminiſtrations of the Law how clearly did this doctrine ſhine forth. Exod. 34 6, 7. The Lord, the Lord, gratious and merciful long ſuffering and abundant in goodneſs and truth. Keeping mercy for thouſands forgiving iniquity tranſgreſſions and ſin.

This is his name for ever this his memoriall to all generations. This the ſtrong tower of ſouls hungring and thirſting after righteouſneſs. Oh lets not be beaten out of this perſwaſion by any Helliſh ſuggeſtion. What great advantage the Devil makes of dreams, viſions, and the like now under the Goſpel wherein God ſpeaketh to us only by his Son, Heb. 1.1, 2. the woful experience I have doth in ſome meaſure manifeſt. The overmuch credit I gave to the deluſion laid upon me in my firſt ſickneſs was the root of all the reſt.

This is my ſecond requeſt oppoſe the word of God againſt all ſuch Hell-hatcht conceipts as would put you upon the wrack of affrighting doubts. Fly from theſe to that leaſt you ſuffer as I have done.

3. Moreover let me begg this that you ſtand not to hear what every one ſaith about Religion, but fall thou upon the profeſſion and practiſe of real Godlineſs with all the ſpeed thou canſt.

He that is a profeſſor in truth and not in hypocriſy (to which conſcience it ſelf is able moſt commonly to bear witneſs) hath the name and glory of the Lord engaged for his relief. He that beareth his teſtimony for G • d and his truths in ſincerity, God cannot find in his heart to do by him what in juſtice he might. The ſins of ſuch as theſe ſtrike high at the honour of God, and therefore well might the Lord deſtroy and blot out their names for ever. But yet he will not. Dan 9 18, 19. They bear his name upon them, what would the more wicked part of the world ſay if God ſhould arm himſelf with fury againſt his own? would they not ſay where is now your God? what is become of all your prayers and all your ſervices which you pretend were done for his glory. The merciful Lord foreſeeth this, and his own glory reſtraineth the hands of the deſtroyer. Deut. 32.26, 27. I ſaid I would ſcatter them into corners, and blot out their remembrance from among men were it not that I feared the wrath of the enemy. God will not doe againſt the Profeſſors of his name as much as he can: for fear leaſt the enemy ſhould ſay and do more then he ought. Our God is ſeldom employed in long and wrathful rebukes of his own, when they are expoſed to the outward rage of their enemie • . He ſpareth them then however they eſcape at another time.

Oh! then let me intreat thee to make choice of the wayes of holineſs as the beſt and ſafeeſt wayes to walk in. Run not to ſeek for ſhelter from your fears and ſorrows amidſt the prophane rout of merry worldlings. Their ſparks of joy caſt but little light, and how ſoon ſhall that be put out? alas! poor ſouls the way of peace have they not known.City of refuge. The horns of the Alter is the likelieſt place for ſecurity againſt the Avenger of bloud. Conſort thy ſelf with thoſe that walk in the truths of practical piety according to the mind of God plainly revealed in his holy word.

My deliverance God wrought for his own name ſake. There were ſins enough in me, fuel enough to maintain the fire of divine diſpleaſure for ever. But the name and glory of God are pretious to him. If thou haſt made profeſſion in ſincerity and truth thou maiſt expect deliverance more then others. A ſincere profeſſor under teoubles hath more reaſon to hope then others, for the glory of the Lord is engaged for his defence.

4. I have this further to add from my own experience. That though thing expectation of deliverance muſt be from God, yet not without the uſe of means.

'Tis the God of peace alone that can make peace in thy troubled ſoul, or elſe all thy labour will amount to nothing. The lips and labours of the moſt learned are but fruitleſs, Iſ. 57.19. till the Lord create the fruits of them both, and make them yeild peace.

Cent. 1.18. And yet 'tis good to feed by the Shepherds tents. A faithful Goſpel miniſtry is an unvalluable mercy. Their gifts in preaching and writing are the purchaſe of the bloud of Chriſt. From the fountain of ſacred truths are theſe Buckets filled. And all for the uſe of poor weak ſouls that want skill and ſtrength of their own. God hath crowned the labours of ſuch and made them men of renown for converſion of ſouls, their labours are the iſſue of the bleſſed ſpirit. Ob then lets not rob the Lord of his glory in raiſing up ſuch lights who have ſpant themſelves in guiding our feet in the ways of peace? by their pretious labours the word of God hath been ſo unfolded, and the glorious attribute • ſo explained and ſweetly applyed, that if poor ſouls have not been much advantaged the fault hath been too much their own. Let me begg of you then to praiſe the Lord for, and to make uſe of, and ſhew all the due reſpect you can to theſe, they are the horſemen and the Chariots of the Goſpel-Iſrael, the beſt viſible aſſiſtance that Earth can afford for management of our ſpiritual war againſt the powers of Hell.

By the bleſſing of God upon my long uſe of the labours of thoſe worthy men have I found much encouragement to hold up to this day under various tryals, a ſhort account of which may conduce to my end in this particular which is to ſtir you up to get, and give the Lord the glory of ſuch comfortable aſſiſtants.

Time was when I lay under darkneſs, deprived of the light and comfort of Gods Countenance. I thought he acted towards me as an enemy, one affliction came in upon the back of another, that my hands began to flagg. My ſins I apprehended to be ſo great that my prayers brought me in but little comfort or none at all. I was ready to cry out the decree is paſt. I conceited that his mercy was clear gone for ever.

In reading Dr. Preſton upon the attributes it pleaſed God to give me ſome ſatisfaction by reading there that there is a certain decree concerning the time appointed for every man to dye yet do not we forbear to eat or take phyſick. and though there be a time when God doth reject a ſoul and caſt him off (as he did Saul) yet this decree being unknown to us there is a door of hope opened for ſinners yet to come to God for though the day of death be determined yet who doth neglect the uſe of means to preſerve life? and page 93 he ſaith O thou poor ſoul wouldeſt thou repent and pray? wouldeſt thou change thy life if there were any hope? why, if there be no more grace in thee then this, and thou doſt pray and repent well as thou canſt: God cannot but hear thee. For he is an immutable God who hath ſtiled himſelf a God hearing prayers.

And from reverend Mr. Bridges who in his lifting up of down caſts among many other things ſaith— Did you ever read in all the book of God that ever God did forſake a man finally that was ſenſible of it, and complained thereof, ſimply for its ſelf, and thinks the time long and tedious till the Lord comes again 〈◊〉 ſuch a one he concludes in the word of the Lord is not fallen totally or finally.

So likewiſe when under thoſe horrible inſtigations to curſe, to ſwear, to blaſpheme, and in the very act of duty or ſpeaking of the bleſſed God, injections to the contrary. How hath the Lord gratiouſly met with me and ſupported me by the hearing and reading of the labours of Gods faithful Miniſters, Mr. Bolton in his comforting of afflicted Conſciences, who tells us theſe are not ours but Satans ſins, and will in the day of reckoning be laid upon his ſcore, and ſome comfort have I met with from Mr. Baxter in his thirty two directions and others.

Under all my troubles God directed me to one or other of his Servants, who by ſpeaking or writing gave much eaſe to my troubled mind.

Above all others I am bound to thankfulneſs to God for the Comfort I received from two, one is that learned bleſſed man Dr. Th. Goodwin, in his Child of Light walking in darkneſs. The abundance of refreſhment that I found from thoſe ten directions of his in that book was ſuch, as I am much bound to bleſs God for him.

The other is Mr. Burroughs in the book I mentioned before, where eſpecially theſe things were a great ſtay to me.

1. That God tenders himſelf to all to whom the Goſpel comes in a Covenant of Grace and not of works. 2. All the good that God doth his Creatures, eſpeciall in relation to eternal Life, is for his Names ſake. 3. There is no qualification in the Creature, made by God himſelf, as a • condition for believing. 4. That it is the great glory of God, and the deſign that he hath in this world, to glorifie himſelf in the way of his free grace, and faithfulneſs towards the Children of men. 5. That it is as delightful to Jeſus Chriſt to have the end of his death fulfilled as it is to us to have our own Salvation. 6. God leaves his own people ſometimes without ſence of his love for many good ends. 7. God hath more glory in ſaving a poor Soul then in caſting him off. When ſuch a one comes in to God, freely confeſſing his ſins, judging himſelf; God hath more glory in the ſalvation of him then in his damnation.

That Sermon likewiſe of Mr. Bridges, Chriſt in travel, helped me much againſt my fears of Apoſtacy, and falling away, where Uſe 2. p. 141. he ſaith, if Chriſt will ſee the travel of his Soul and be ſatiſfied, here we may ſee the reaſon why we cannot be ſatified with that opinion of the Saints Apoſtacy. This alſo being unſatiſfactory to the heart of Chriſt, can a man be ſatiſfied to ſee one of his members torn from him? can a man delight in it or endure it? ſurely then this Doctrine of falling from grace muſt needs be falſe if Chriſt travelleth for the ſalvation of his people, he ſhall ſee their perſeverance.

Thus have I acquainted you with part of the great advantage I found in making uſe of the labours of the Miniſters of Chriſt, oh love them, lay out for them, look upon them as the gift of Chriſt for the good of you, and the Lord enlarge them, and multiply ſuch labourers in his harveſt.

To conclude what I have upon experience to ſay to thee, poor ſad ſoul; you have ſeen how touch miſery I have felt, and how the Lord drew me out of it, therefore look upon thy condition as a mourner in Sion, Iſ. 61.3. chap. 33.18. to be much better then the moſt jovial ſinner in Sion, let thoſe dreadful chaſtiſements of God laid upon you by the hand of Satan, either in the way ſpoken of, before, or in any other whatſoever, never paſs with you as ſufficient cauſe of doubting of the love of God. Learn to make a difference between matter of humilliation and matter of doubts and deſperation. 2 Cor. 12.7. 1 Joh. 3.23. Satans buffetings may well beget humblings in a Paul. But cannot diſſolve the Commandment of believing in the name of the Son of God. Be thy troubles what they will remember. The Mount is the place of viſion. When you are at the higheſt top of troubles you are nigheſt to deliverance. Gen. 22.14. In the Mount will the Lord be ſeen, hath been a fruitful place of comfort to me often in my diſtreſs.

Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace whoſe mind is ſtayed on thee; becauſe he truſteth in thee. Truſt ye in the Lord for ever: for in the Lord Jehovah is everlaſting ſtrength Iſ. 26.3, 4. For the viſion is yet for an appointed time but at the end it ſhall ſpeak and not lye: though it tarry, wait for it, becauſe it will ſurely come, it will not tarry. Hab. 2.3. There hath no temptation. 1. Cor. 10.3. God ſhall tread Satan under your feet ſhortly. Rom. 16▪ 20. It is good that a man ſhould both hope and quietly wait for the ſalvation of God, Lam. 3.26.

2. 〈◊〉 word or two to you that have been in deep waters, at Hell Gates, and yet are delivered. Let me put you in remembrance of theſe two or three duties.

1. Oh ſee that you ingage your hearts unto the Lord! I will love the Lord with my whole heart. I will love him dearly. Pſ. 103.1, &c. Bleſs the Lord oh my ſoul and all that is within me bleſs his holy name. Bleſs the Lord oh my ſoul and forget not all his benefits, who forgiveth all thine iniquities who healeth all thy diſeaſes, who redeemeth thy life from deſtruction who crowneth thee with loving kindneſs and tender mercies. Oh pray that your love to him who hath delivered your ſouls from the ſnares of cruel death, and pulled your feet out of the miry Clay where there was no bottom may encreaſe and abound more and more. Joſh. 24.14, Sincere affections and diſſobedience are the only returns that God looks for. Deny not theſe in the higheſt degree.

2. Give up your lives for the Lord. Be content he ſhall diſpoſe of them in the way he knoweth beſt for his glory. If he ſhall call you forth to ſuffer death for a teſtimony of your love to him and the Goſpel of his Son, think it not too much for him. Well mayſt thou undergo ten thouſand natural deaths, were it poſſible, for Jeſus Chriſts redemption from the hands of thy ſpiritual enemies is cauſe enough for thee to ſerve him without fear of what man can do unto thee. Look upon thy paſt deliverance as things never, no never to be forgotten, nor ſufficiently to be required by thee.

3. Take care, now thou haſt found him whom thy ſoul loveth, oh take care for his undiſturbed reſidence.

You know what it is to want the comforting preſence of Jeſus Chriſt, let thoſe, who know not the terrors of the Lord, and the fearful conſequents of his forſakings, venture the diſpleaſure of him, by their ſlighting of his precepts, and ſlothfulneſs in his paths, but let not us do ſo, we that know what it is to be thrown into the depths of horror, and how hard, as well as ſweet, is our recovery thence, oh let not us dare to ſleep upon the top of the maſt, but rather keeping faſt hold upon our beloved by the hand of Faith, beg of him that he would not depart out of our hearts, lay a ſtrict charge over all the cares and comforts, and companies, and conditions of this life, Canticles 2.7. by the Roes and by the Hindes, that they ſtir not up nor awake our Love until he pleaſe.

4. If the Lord Jeſus Chriſt ſhall pleaſe for his own glory to walk a while out of your hearts again, if he ſhall at any time withdraw the comforts of the Holy Ghoſt, looſe not in Satan again by unbelief, diſtreſs not your ſelves overmuch by giving way to the leaſt miſtruſt as if he would never return, Pſ. 77. and more remember his loving kindneſs and his works and wonders of old, think, he never goes away but when it is expedient for us, Joh. 16.7. and having already ſealed us by the holy ſpirit of promiſe, given us eye-ſalve, enlightning our underſtandings in the knowledge of his love, whereby we are perſwaded our names are written in the book of Life, R • m. 11.29. The gifts and calling of God are without repentance, 2 Cor. 1.10. He that hath delivered may well be truſted, that he will do ſo again, John 10▪ 29. No Man or Devil can take us out of the hands of God, John 13.1. Whom be loveth he loveth to the end, Phil. 1.6. He that hath begun a good work will carry it on to the day of Chriſt.

5. You have been delivered from the violence of temptations, but remember that yet we carry about us ſuch ſinful natures, the Fruits of our firſt Parents tranſgreſſion, that would again put up his head againſt God and his moſt righteous Laws, yea and take part with Satan againſt him, and our ſelves too, there is yet an unregenerate part, the remnant of the old Adam remaining in the beſt and holieſt of m • n, after all the forty years temptations of Iſrael in an howling wilderneſs and when they are brought into the Land of reſt, Judg. 3. yet there the Amorite will be found, nothing but diſſolution will fetch the leproſie of natural corruption out of our earthly tabernacles, Lev. 14.45. and eſpecially will this curſed corruption annoy us with offers to do the ſame things, that Satan before he was diſpoſſeſſed would have done, my experience tells me ſome of the old filth ſtill ſticks behind. The wiſe God will have it ſo, that the vileneſs and greatneſs of our old ſins, might not be forgotten, that we may be poiſed down with humility, and put a longing after natures diſſolution, till which time ſin (now twiſted with our nature) will not be removed, this remnant of the old man, with its ſtirrings cannot chooſe but be an heavy burden to the new, Rom. 7.24. 'tis ſuch a body, that it made the very ſoul of a Paul groan and cry out for a deliverance, Ex. 17.16. This • malck God hath ſworn it, that he, will have war with it for evnr.

As good Souldiers of Chriſt our Captain, let us be perſwaded to hold on our war againſt this party of corruption yet abiding in our natures, and in ſo doing, we have the comfort of theſe enſuing conſiderations.

1. That this remainder of curſed nature, though it be not utterly deſtroyed yet ſhall it not have dominion over us, ſo as to bring forth Fruits unto death, or to be charged upon our perſons to condemnation.

Rom. 8 2. For by Chriſt our Lord we are diſchargea and ſet at freedom from the Law of ſin and death, being under the Covenant of grace, we have received the ſpirit of life and power, even that bleſſed ſpirit that raiſed our Lord Jeſus Chriſt from the dead, which hath quickned us and put life and power into us, in a good meaſure enabling us to crucifie the fleſh with its affections and luſts, Gal. 5.24. ſo that its dominion is taken away though its life be continued for a ſeaſon.

2. And it is but for a ſeaſon that its life is continued in us, the war will not hold always, there is a time coming when we ſhall be delivered from this bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the ſons of God, Rom. 8.19. &c. 23. and not onely we but thoſe very Creatures, the Heaven and the Earth ſhall be ſet free from that bondage of corruption, which lyeth upon them by reaſon of the ſin of man, in that day we ſhall be made like unto the Son of God in our meaſure.

The tranſfiguration upon the Mount ſeemeth to be a reſemblance of that glory, wherein Jeſus Chriſt ſhall appear (as he was the Son of David) when he ſhall come to take the Kingdom unto himſelf, then ſhall the poor benighted Sons of the day welcome in that joyful morning with a new Song and Pſalms of tryumphant victory in their hands, Rev. 15.3. then ſhall all the enemies of our Souls be totally ſubdued, and even this Amalek of inbred corruption, againſt which we have been fighting with the ſword of the Spirit many a weary day, Numb. 24.20. I ſay then this Amalek the firſt of the nations that warred againſt Iſrael (our ſouls) his end ſhall be that he be deſtroyed for ever.

3. Such a ſence of ſin remaining in us, as hinders our rejoycing in expectation of the future glory, or joyful thanksgiving for our preſent deliverances is not our duty, but our ſin.

God will not be robbed of his glory under a pretence of mourning for his diſhonour as ſoon as God the Father hath delivered us from the power of darkneſs and tranſlated us into the Kingdom of his dear Son. Col. 1.12, 13. 'Tis then our duty to give thanks to him who hath made us meet to be partakers of the inheritance among the Saints in light.

He that readeth the book of the Acts and conſidereth how the holy Ghoſt takes notice of the affection of joy in the converts of thoſe times, Act. 2.46. Act. 8.8.39. Act. 9.31. Act. 16.34. may readily conclude that it is as natural for babes in Chriſt as ſoon as they are born to rejoyce, as it is for others to cry. The life of a real Chriſtian ſhould be a continual holy-day. And therefore let us keep the feaſt according to that of our Apoſtle. 1 Cor. 5.8. And follow the advice of that holy man Mr. Downam to that purpoſe in his Chriſtian warfare (who himſelf was not only troubled with this old man, but alſo with blaſphemous ſuggeſtions, as he himſelf told me many years paſt when I went to ſeek comfort in my condition.) Let us ſubmit, lye down, acquieſe, and be ſatisfied in the wiſdom and goodneſs of God whoſe providence is every where and over ruleth all things in Heaven and earth for his own glory and his peoples good. And rejoycing in our hopes of glory, and intereſt in all the bleſſed promiſes of the word of God: ſo go on in our Chriſtian warfare with good courage, not feating men or Devils, as to perform out duties towards God, and reach out after the end of our faith the ſalvation of our ſouls. Chriſt in his word hath given us good aſſurance of our obtaining this. In fidelity is the Devils greateſt engine to deſtroy our rejoycing of hope. Would the Lord but go on with his Conqueſt over unbelief, and raiſe our faith into a more ſollid ſubſtance of things hoped for, Heb. 11.1. And a clearer evidence of things not ſeen. Would he but teach us how to live by faith, how rich a living would it afford us? how ſweetly might we in the contemplation of the truth and worth of that promiſed glory triumph over all adverſities.

That ſtate wherein poor man ſhall behold the face of the bleſſed God in ſuch a fullneſs that the glorious Angels Heb. 2.16. are not capable of the like (man who hath a nearer relation to Jeſus Chriſt hath alſo a nearer ſtanding to the very throne then the bleſſed Angels themſelves. Rev. 4.4. &c.) is ſo tranſporting ſo raviſhing in the foreſight thereof that we may well take up that triumphant ſong.

Oh Death where is thy ſt • ng oh Grave where is thy victory, 1 Cor. 15.55.

Behold what manner of love the Father hath loved us withall that we ſhould be called the Sons of God. Now are we the Sons of God. And it doth not yet appear what we ſhall be: but we know that when he ſhall appear we ſhall be like him: for we ſhall ſee him as he is.

Oh! the length the heighth the breadth and depth, the fulneſs of that love of Chriſt that paſſeth knowledge.

Now I come to the third ſort of Profeſſors • nd they are ſuch as have never been greatly • roubled: who though they have been ſcared • nd lightly touched by the Arrows of the Almighty: yet cannot ſay they have ſtuck faſt • ithin them, and that the Poiſon thereof • ath at any time drunk up their ſpirits. To • heſe my requeſt is that they would ſuffer a • ord of warning from one who hath more •• eply drunk of the Cup of trembling. That •• up which his Lord and maſter drank to the • ottom, that ſo in a little he might be con •• rmable to his head and having obtained • ercy might be found faithful.

The main of all I have to ſay to ſuch is •• at my hearty prayer to God for them is, •• at they all may be ſtrengthened with all might according to his glorious power unto all patience and long ſuffering with joyfulneſs. Col. 1.11. That they may walk worthy of the Lord in all well pleaſing. Remembring.

1. The gentler dealings of the Lord with them then with others, calls for hearty acknowledgement of thanksgiving. Judg. 8.16. He might have taught you with the bryars and thorns of the Wilderneſs, whereas he hath led you with the gentle cords of a man, Hoſ. 11.4. Spared you as a man ſpareth his Son that ſerveth him. Mal. 3 17. He hath made you free without ſerving a long and hard Apprenticeſhip under the yoke of bondage. He hath gone an eaſier way with yo • then the way of the Philiſtins, Exod. 13.17 you have not ſeen warr as others have done Let the miſeries of me and others provok • you to thankfulneſs and fruitfulneſs in ever • good work.

2. Remember your condition is not yet 〈◊〉 ſafe, your danger is not ſo farr over, but th •• you have need of caution, your great ca •• ſhould be that your latter end might be pea •• Prize the peace of your Conſcience, a •• while you are in with God, oh! keep in wi •• him ſtill, if you let ſin in, you drive God 〈◊〉 of your ſouls. And when he is gone, all yo •• peace is gone, all your comfort of hope is gone too. A privation of the light of his countenance will beget a diſmal night of horror, ſin will tumble you down from your Heaven of Communion with God, and then the valley of the ſhadow of death will be your walk, and Helliſh fiends ſhall frighten you there with continual alarums of your falling lower into the depths of Hell. And how long it may be thus with you who can tell? oh! how will you be able to bear ſuch changes as theſe are? learn of me, and others in like caſe, and be wiſe? think not that your preſent favour of men or gain of Silver and Gold, or flattering pleaſures of vanity will make you ſatisfaction for the harms done by ſin. Or that the remembrance of theſe will ranſome you from, or purchaſe you the leaſt gentler uſuage under, the hand of terror. Your profeſſion is no priviledged condition. Sin can find out the ſinner even when he hath taken Sanctuary in Sion. Iſ. 33.14. Nothing but righteouſneſs can deliver from death. Prov. 10 2. Be found any where or doing any thing elſe and be ſure your ſin will find you out. Num. 32.23.

Thoſe things that appear to thee to be plainly ſinful, or of the lawfulneſs whereof thou makeſt a doubt; peremtorily refuſe the one, and patiently forbear till thou art well ſatisfied in the other; or e • ſe thou playeſt the Bedlam in hazarding the light of Gods countenance.

Hazarding? nay, if thou belong to God, ſure, ſure ſuffering one time or other▪ and in ſome degree or other under the ſad forſakings of the peace of thy own Conſcience, and the grieved bleſſed ſpirit thy Comforter. Near relation to God will not carry thee an inch the further from his ſore chaſtiſements. Judgement begins fi • ſt at the houſe of God, 1 Pet. 4.17. You only have I known of all the Families of the Earth—therefore will I puniſh you for all your iniquities, Am • 3 2.

Chriſtians advanced to greater heights of gifts and grace then others, Mat. 11.23. had need look better to their ſtanding then others, for if they fall it will be lower then others. Such falls though it may not break the neck 'twil be ſure to break the bones, Pſal. 51.8. He ſaid well but not all. That 'tis better for a man to looſe a whole eſtate then to tell one lye. But I ſay were the whole world a mans own eſtate twere better bid an everlaſting adieu to it all, let Wife and Children fare as they will; then provoke one ſingle God to be gone in his diſpleaſure. If he goes I partly can tell you what that is; 'tis that which I am not able to tell you for the greatneſs of its miſery. This is thy Benjamin. If thou art bereaved of this, then thou art bereaved indeed. Gen. 43.14.

3. Be ready to ſpeak and ſpend, to ſay and do, all that you can for God.

Your goodneſs cannot extend to God but there are Saints in the Earth, Pſ. 16.2. let theſe be to thee the excellent ones, in theſe take thou thy whole delight. By liberal things you may be made to ſtand Iſa. 32.8.

God will not caſt them out of his favour who have room in heart and houſe to entertain his Miniſters caſt out of all for Conſcience ſake. Even Moab might look for a ſtability of his throne upon theſe terms. Iſa. 16.4, 5. Unmercifulneſs to the Ambaſſadours of Chriſt will turn his love into diſpleaſure. Luk. 10 16. He that troubles Kingdoms for unkindneſſes ſhewed to theſe, Pſ. 105.15. will not ſurely be behind with thee for thy love to them.

To ſee godly rich men miſerable in the da • of their bretherens calamity is ſuch a fight that the times of the Apoſtles had not the like. Acts 4.32. Nor can diſability to ſpare for ſuch uſes be well aledged, while needleſs, feaſting, unneceſſary attendance coſtly apparel, rich preſents to great men purchaſing of Lands are found among them. Lets take a meaſure of the greatneſs of this ſin by the proceedings of the day of judgement; Where ſins of omiſſion make up the whole inditement. Mat. 25.41. &c. Chriſt in his Miniſters, Chriſt in his members, may be poor, and ſick, and in Priſons, and in want of Cloathing. Slight him now, and it ſhall not be forgotten.

You may hear of it when you would not, conſider well, hath the long enjoying of the Goſpel taken away the ſweetneſs of it? ſhould it not be as ſweet to you now as ever it was? are not we as much concerned in it, as they were in primitive days? expect we not now as great rewards as they did then? and have we not as good ſecurity for the rich returns of ſuch disburſments as ever they had? a Diſciple of Chriſt, a Prophet of God, though but ſo nominally, melted into wants and miſery by the ſcorching beams of perſecution, is excellent water to caſt your bread upon. Eccleſ. 11.1. When harveſt comes you ſhall ſee what mighty Sheaves, what full meaſures, heaped and preſſed down your ſmall expence of bread-corn will amount unto. He that cannot give a little how will he be able to ſell all? Mark 10.21. Let him that would have a Heaven of peace within, here, and peace above for ever, think of theſe things.

4. Pray. oh! pray, and add to prayer watchfulneſs that he enter not into temptation. Mat. 26.41.

Fervent Prayer can do much with God: and watching conduceth much to the fervor of our prayers. Watchfulneſs will prevent the terror and danger of ſudden ſurprizes. It gives a ſeaſonable alarme to the ſleepy ſoul to ſtand to its arms. He that knows what it is to pray in the Spirit, Eph. 6.18. and how, to watch thereunto with all perſeverance, hath ſuch a jewel of grace that will preſerve all other graces ſafe. This is the Life-guard while our King walketh in his Galleryes. Cant. 7.5. 'Tis that which (though it cannot abſolutely free the ſoul from the plots of the World Fleſh and Devil) will enable it to withſtand them all, Eph. 6.13. and ſtand faſt after all. This is truly the Wine of Angels and Poiſon of Devils.

In brief then. Remember that you never ſuffer Satan to prevail with you for the laying aſide of this bleſſed duty, he will ſet hard upon you for that end. Unworthyneſs of Perſon, want of comfort, weakneſs of faith, unſucceſſfulneſs after all one thing or other will the Devil plead to make thy tempted ſoul reſtrain prayer before God. If he can but bring thee to let fall thy hands, he knows what will be the iſſue of the battle. Amalek did not more ſurely prevaile againſt the Armies of Iſrael then he will againſt thee. Exod. 16.11. Oh! then pray, and pray again, lead us not into temptation. My woful experience bids me tell you that 'tis a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God. It may be by theſe means you may be kept from entring into the terror of temptation.

Having now ended all that I have to ſay to thoſe who, in ſincerity making profeſſion of the ways of God, are called by his name. My tender love to the glory of God, the God of my ſalvation, and my compaſſion of the ſouls of poor impenitent ſinners puts me upon an adventure to write a few more words. Who knoweth but ſome one or other of theſe may read what I have here written, and in ſo doing ſee the caſe they ſtand in to be an evil caſe. And what cauſe they have (hearing what the ſence of ſin hath wrought in others) with all their might and main to turn back from their eager perſuit of periſhing pleaſures and •• y to Jeſus Chriſts Perſon, promiſes, and paths, to ſave themſelves from the wrath that is to come.

Poor ſinners! be not offended at the name, I could be willing to purchaſe a better title for you, even the worſt of you all, with the expence of prayers and tears, I reproach you not while I thus beſpeak you, nor factiouſly and proudly would I inſinuate as if I or any upon nature's account deſerved a better name: or as if different ſentiments about lower matters in Religion were a ſufficien • cauſe to give out ſuch wide diſtinguiſhing titles, alas! 'tis no ſuch matter, I mean no other then ſuch, whoſe ſence and feeling of the heavy weight of ſin hath been ſo little that to this day they have not ſeen any cauſe to cry out of their danger, and amend their doings, and with all ſpeed and dilligence to enquire for, and accept of ſalvation offered by Jeſus Chriſt in the miniſtry of the Goſpel. Such as theſe, who (making light of the matters, the weighty matters of God and of their own ſouls, of the Scriptures, of Heaven, of Hell, of ſin, and of holyneſs, of death, and of judgement) can content themſelves with ſuch and ſo much Religion as will ſecure them from the laſh of humain Laws, and the diſquieting guilt of a natural Conſcience; in the mean while ſpending their pretious hours and days, and years, in the unprofitable works of darkneſs, ſerving divers luſts and pleaſures, uſing the members of their bodies as ſervants to all unrighteouſneſs, living in the luſt of uncleanneſs, adding drunkenneſs to thirſt, ſpeaking all manner of evil of, and deſpightfully uſing, and perſecuting ſuch whoſe lives are not of the ſame faſhion, thinking it ſtrange that an • ſhould not run into the ſame exceſs of riot with them, and leaſt by the reproofs dropping from the lips and lives of ſuch, their ſinful pleaſures ſhould fail them, they make new ſins, ſuch as God never made, and ſearch out iniquities, accompliſh a dilligent ſearch, that ſomewhat might be had to throw in the faces of faithful reprovers if there be no more then the matters of their God, 'tis theſe I mean.

To you Poor ſinners, would I fain ſpeak a few words. Oh! bleſs God that you are yet in a capacity to hear, and that your caſe and condition is not quite hopeleſs. Yet, whilſt you live, we may hope that the filthyeſt Adulterer the moſt ſwiniſh drunſtard, prophaneſt ſinner may obtain mercy. You have a Peradventure left you yet, 2 Tim. 2.15. that God may give you repentance to the acknowledging of the truth, and that yet, you may recover your ſelves out of the ſnare of the Devil. Yet, you may avoid the moſt ſure and fore rewards of ungodlyneſs, unconceivable dread and horror, which firſt or laſt he will power out in mercileſs meaſures upon poor ſouls that now are Priſoners at large; and (methinks they ſhould have little heart to hold up their heads a day would they but ſeriouſly conſider how as birds in a ſtring) they are taken Captive by Satan at his will.

Let me beſeech you for the ſake of whatſoever is dear to you that you would but heartily believe, conſider ſeriouſly, and remember

1. That all that I have here written concerning the dreadfulneſs, and confounding horror ariſing from my apprehenſions of Gods diſpleaſures is true; 'tis not a thing feigned, but really felt, by me. You think, it may be, that God cannot be angry; or if he be that you can ſtand under the ftowns of him, and that your tranquility and preſent quiet in the ways of your ignorance, and diſſobedience, is a Mountain that cannot be removed. But alas! you are utterly miſtaken. A League with death and Hell is not to be truſted, Iſ. 28.15, 18. the Devil will break his promiſe with you one time or other, after his fair promiſes he will fall fowlly upon you. You think to be troubled for ſin, is nothing; to have Satan and Conſcience let looſe upon a man, and the Lord withdraw himſelf from ſuch a ſoul all the while, you think theſe things are nothing, and ſuch thoughts make you venture to hold on in your evil ways: and 'tis hard to drive them out of you. The Law and the Prophets cannot do it eaſily. If you believe not theſe the teſtimony of Dives ariſing from the dead would be doubted to be a meer deluſion, Luke 16.31. you have had my experience delivered you in faſthfulneſs. I have certainly found that Gods permiſſion of Satan to rage upon the Soul, is a woe, then which there is not a worſe on this ſide Hell.

2 Conſider that though what terrour I have already felt was intollerably great; yet that which impenitency and impiety will bring upon poor ſinners hereafter will be incomparably more.

This at preſent is but whipping with Rods, that with Scorpions. This but a painted Fire, that a real burning Fire. This hath its mixtures of mercy, that's without mixture. This is a ſtate of darkneſs, but that utter darkneſs. Mas. 8.12. This departure of God from the ſoul may be in love, but that is go ye curſed. Ch. 25.41. This is made ſad by the preſence of the Devils, that infinitely worſe, for there are none but Devils to torment, no Saint, no Angel, to give the leaſt eaſe. Here time may make a better change, Eccleſ. 9.4. and hope may be a good anchor to preſerve the Veſſel from preſent ſhip-wrack: but there eternity admits not the leaſt ſpark of hope that things ſhall ever mend, and deſperation ſhall ſo preſs down the ſufferer, that nothing but allmighty power can bear him up in his beirg under ſuch eternal dread and pains.

3. When terrors begin to ariſe the height of all your preſent confidence cannot keep you up, under the weight of ſin ſet upon the Conſcience do but conſider how have the mighty falne? thoſe who have been bold as Lyons, committing iniquity with greedyneſs, not afraid to put affronts upon God or men, ſpeak loftily, ſetting their mouths againſt Heaven and their tongues walking through the Earth; Pſ. 72.3. inſomuch that the confidence of, them hath almoſt made a David diffident to obſerve it, and yet how are theſe brought into deſolation as in a moment? they have been utterly conſumed with terrors. v. 19 ah poor weak man thou wilt never be able to ſtand under that burden of guilt which ſank the mighty Angels that excell in power from Heaven into the lowermoſt Hell. That which makes the whole frame of nature, the whole Creation to groan, alas how will it ſqueeze thee into confuſion? that which the Creator the mighty God was found able only to bear, and in bearing it, was not able to forbear crying out my God, my God, why haſt thou forſaken me▪ Mat. 27.46. Thinkeſt thou that this will not be too hard and too heavy for thee? poor finner! oh think of this in time, now thou are confident and bold to commit ſin but what wilt thou do in the end thereof? will the boldneſs of thy countenance and the height of thy confidence abide the ſame for ever? where is the courage of Cain? the confidence of Judas? the craft of Achitophel? and the ſtout hearts of thouſands from the days of Cain? whats become of all theſe? how have theſe ſturdy Oaks been when terror came, but as ſtubble before the wind, and as Chaff that the ſtorm driveth away? are you ſtronger then theſe.

4. Are not your ſins as great as mine, and others of whoſe miſeries you hear? are not your ſins as great and as many as ours have been? you think (it may be) to fare better becauſe you preſume you are better then thoſe whom God hath plagued with his diſpleaſure. If the ſayings of Chriſt may be your guide, he tels you nay, Luke 13.3. but except you repent you ſhall all likewiſe periſh. And moreover let me tell you that if groſs grievous and ſcandalous open ſinners, or ſecret falſehearted hypocrites were the only ſufferers in this kind; the whole book of Job, the 73. Pſalm, and other places of Scripture might have well been ſpared out of our Bibles. Oh no! I for my own part muſt needs ſay my ſins, my unthankfulneſs, my unprofitableneſs, the great unſuitableneſs of my heart and life to the purity required by the Law and love of my bleſſed Redeemer are ſuch, as that I have had, and ſtill have abundant cauſe to lay my mouth in the duſt and to cry out unclean, unclean, my ſpot in regard of theſe hath been very grievou • , my grapes have had too too much ſowerneſs in them to put my teeth an edge as indeed they have done: but yet (to the glory of the free-grace of God) my ſpot hath not been the ſpot of the wicked. Your Vine hath been the Vine of Sodom and your Grapes are Grapes of Gall their cluſters are bitter. Your drunkenneſs Whoredoms helliſh Oaths Curſings, and the like ſins have been ſuch as make it wonderful that the Almighty ſhould ſpare you and puniſh ſuch as mourn under their far leſſer ſins. I do not juſtifie my ſelf thereby though I muſt declare I know none of thoſe things by my ſelf. Only I repeat the queſtion to thee again. Canſt thou think God will always paſs by thee unpuniſhed ſeeing be hath not ſpared ſuch as deſire to fear his name? oh! no he will not, be confident, he will not. If he diſtribute ſorrows in anger, if he puts his own willing people on the rack of an accuſing tormenting Conſcience. Where oh! where ſhall the ungodly and the ſinners appear.

5. Or do you think that it is not ſin nor the Devil that are the cauſe of all thoſe ſad things that are here related: but a meer mellancholly diſtemper of body? do you think they are but the iſſue of a mellancholly brain, and no more.

Briefly to this give me leave (poor ſinner) to ſay.

1. For my ſelf, if theſe two things ſpeak any thing in the caſe, then ſurely thou ar • quite out in thy conjectures. For.

1. When I had my troubles of mind growing upon me. I often uſed the means appointed for prevention or correction of that diſtemper and yet my condition was the ſame ſtill.

2. When deliverance came it came ſuddenly. Such changes as I have felt from midnight to mid-day without any interpoſal of twi-light demonſtrates my diſtemper to have been occaſioned by another hand, and for other cauſes then that of mellancholly.

2. For others; I go not about to deny but that 'tis poſſible and ordinary to meet with perſons, whom the hand of mellancholly hath marvellouſly dejected, Learned experienced men have ſaid ſo. And to ſay otherwiſe (in me) may well paſs for preſumptions folly. Only I would expreſs my fears leaſt it ſhould prove in the ears of carnal men a Doctrine provoking to unwarrantable mirth: and in the ears of weak troubled believers an impediment to faith. I fear while good men aſcribe ſo much of the troubles of our ſouls to the humours of our bodies, the care of the body ſhould exceed that of the ſoul, and thereby the glory of God and quiet of our own hearts ſhould at once be dangerouſly aſſaulted. Sure it is not for nothing that a deep ſilence lyeth over all the holy Scriptures as to this matter; that many are the troubles of righteous, and that thoſe troubles lye moſt about the heart, one deſign of the Holy-Ghoſt in thoſe writings is to ſet forth; examples of which are abundant there; but not the leaſt hint at any time as if the black and bitter waters of a diſturbed mind ſprang from the jarring humours of the fleſh. Gods anger for ſin (either by way of diſſertion of comfort: or infliction of temptation, by permiſſion of Satan to tyranize over the ſoul) are the only cauſes of every trouble; the hiding of his face begets trouble: Pſ. 30.7. the cauſing of that to ſhine again is the only remedy. Job, 34.29. This is all the wiſdom of God hath thought fit to publiſh. Pſ. 4 6, 7. If we muſt needs ſay more, lets look to our inferences. Whatever hand this groſs and heavy humour may have in the troubles of the ſoul, let the finner (willing to hold faſt his iniquity by refuſing to entertain hard thoughts of it) but plainly anſwer theſe things; thou thinkeſt that melancholly is the cauſe of troubles.

1. What is the cauſe why any man is thus troubled with melancholy? is it not becauſe of fin? is it not the conceived anger of an all-powerful God? or if the party troubled find no ſenſe of divine diſpleaſure within himſelf, yet who but an Atheiſt will deny, the wounds made upon the natural ſpirits or thoſe made upon the ſpirit, to be both of them a puniſhment for ſin? as nothing proves a Deity more plainly then the argument which prophane Atheiſts moſt urge againſt it: ſo nothing more ſets forth the deadly nature of ſin, or the dangerous condition of the ſinner then that very thing which is ſo much in uſe for their extenuation Atheiſts tell us there had been no talk of a God in the world if it had not been for fear; 'twas fear ſay they that found out and founded the notion of a Deity, whereas there had been (to ſpeak truly) no ſuch thing as fear if firſt there had not been a God. In like manner argue poor ſinful ſinners, there had been no talk of ſpiritual malladies had it not been for melancholly ſpirits, no diſtreſs of the mind but by diſtemper of the humours; and who begat this blackneſs of diſtempered humours? is not the hand of ſin in all this! ſure 'twil be granted; and if ſo I'le ſpeak a word to thee anon.

2. Thou thinkeſt a wounded Conſcience is but a melancholly conceit; ſure thou doſt not think that it is ſo in all. Give me leave to enquire what do you think was that which troubled Adam in she day that he eat of the forbidden Fruit? what was that which un-Paradiced him ſo ſoon? he haſt • es away to the thickets for an hiding-place, Gen. 3.7, 8. lays hold on the broadeſt Leaves he could meet with for a covering of his nakedneſs. What aileth him now? is he not in Paradice ſtill, as he was before? what makes this ſuddain alteration? why ſo fearful in the cool of the evening, who in the dawning of the paſt morning knew not what did belong to ſuch a ſtate? ſome mighty chance muſt needs be in him for there was none without him. All things about him were the ſame, but he himſelf was not. No external abatement of the pleaſures of ſenſe was here as yet to be found. The ear had the ſame melody of the Choriſters of the Woods for delight as it had before. The mouth the ſame rarity and variety of pleaſant Fruits to feed upon, as it had before. The Flowers, and Herbs, and Spices did as liberally ſend abroad their ſweet Odours as they did before. The ſight wanted nothing of that compleateſt beauty which clad the whole Creation. It had the ſame raviſhing Object, diſcerning Organ, and diffuſing Medium, the eye ſaw, the Sun ſhone, the creatures ſhewed themſelves as much as they did before▪ And yet poor Adam could not take that delight in any thing as he took before oh monſtrou • . Oh aſtoniſhing change? what will not a guilty Conſcience do? when ſin entred into the world what a death came upon all the comforts that were in the world? and now what footſteps of melancholly canſt thou find here? it is probable that he who came but newly warm out of his makers hands, ſo exactly tempered as might have made him live a life of immortallity, ſhould thus be aſtoniſhed and c • uſhed into amazing dread upon the juddain and all by the abounding of a melancholick humour! away, with this conceit. Rather think what ſad work ſin will one day or other make upon the ſoul that maketh not a ſpeedy return and an holy, timely reſiſtance againſt it.

3. But ſtill thou art of opinion that 'tis melancholly that doth all this miſchief amongſt the Sons of Adam, however it fared with their Father; well be it ſo, but tell me then, doſt thou think that it is not poſſible for the • to fall into the like condition, is not the God with whom thou haſt to do the God of nature as well as the God of grace, and therefore able to prohibite the comfortable influence of, and ſuffer diſcords and diſorders to ariſe in, both? he is able to transform thee into a breathing Statue, to make this jollity and roaring mirth, to hide its head, and hold its peace: while ſorrow and ſadneſs; tribulation and anguiſh gnaw upon thine heart; he is able to cut off the ſpirit of Princes Pſ. 76.12. Kings cannot ſtand before him; they that have the greateſt advantages and priviledges above all other men to ſolace themſelves in the abundance of Earthly delights: do little think how eaſily God can bring them down without hands; he can ſmite thy heart with melancholly as well as others; 'tis but for him to croſs thee in the thing thou ſetteſt thine heart upon, and where art thou then? no further proof of this is needed then that of Saul. A man conſidering to what, by whom, over whom he was raiſed that might have as well expected a peaceable continuance in his great and unſought-for Royalty as any other Monarch. And yet you find it otherwiſe, God for his neglect of waiting patiently and believingly takes away his Kingdom; puts him under the rule of an evil ſpirit; 1 Sam. 16.14. The ſpirit of the Lord departed from him, and the evil ſpirit from the Lord terrified, troubled him. Thus you ſee 'tis not eaſie to dally with ſin, God can make the ſinner quickly weary of his life, by withdrawing the comfort and quiet of it, and filling it with ſo much terror and horror, that there ſhall not be the leaſt room left for pleaſures. I told you of Nebuchadnezzar, of Cain, Bellſhazzer, and Judas, and now of Saul; and you your ſelves may poſſibly remember what doleful examples have been in your own knowledge: how thoſe who ſpent their days in pleaſure, putting Heaven to defiance by their ungodly converſations, have ſome of them at leaſt been glad to be beholden to the Knife; to the Halter; to the Water; to the Sword, to the Bullet, &c. to help their tormented ſoules out of their weary bodies. So exquiſite is that torture ariſing from an awakened Conſcience, that it puts the patient upon a miſerable choice of ending his preſent agonies with the adventure of an infinitely more worſe, rather then abide the woe that is therein. Poor man! ſuch a thing as this can the hand of the Lord once lifted up againſt thee bring upon thee, Thou thinkeſt thou haſt little cauſe to fear falling into the depths of terrors becauſe reſolved to avoid melancholly by a merry life. Thou conceiveſt that to be the only cauſe of any ones diſtreſs, and therefore not ſo much to be feared. But, were this true, alaſ • ! thou haſt the greater cauſe to ſear. Thine enemy is within thy own bowels. As Phyſick doth not always preſerve him who with the greateſt care and conſtancy obſerveth its rules; but oftentimes apparently, brings to an untimely end: ſo carnal joyes do by inward peace, preſerve it they may a while, but many times deſtroy it, by provoking the juſt God to ariſe in his wrath. But however this is moſt certain; corporal medicines cannot immortalize any mans perſon; nor can carnal mirth any mans peace; aſſuredly God will break that peace that is not purchaſed by the bloud of Chriſts Croſs. One time or other (call it melancholly or what you will) that fit of fears ſhall ſo cloſely follow the now preſumptuous ſoul that no carnal, no corporal cordial, nothing but a touch of that hand that caſt down, will be able to rid away. Such an evil that no King can cure but he whoſe prerogative it is to kill and make alive out of whoſe hand none can deliver. Deut. 32.29.

6. Remember judgement is already gone out againſt thee, the ſentence wants nothing but execution. The righteous Law of God which he is reſolved to magnifie and make it glorious hath already declared what ſhall be the end of impenitency.

Bleſs not thy ſelf with vain thoughts that God will ſpare any one for his greatneſs or for his goodneſs, or his meanneſs, or for any thing but his own Sons righteouſneſs; and ſuch alſo muſt not go free without their ſhare of a wounded Conſcience. 4. eſpecial hours of temptation. At the begining of Spiritual life; or the end of natural; or upon ſome hainous fin committed, or heavy afliction let out; God uſually at one of theſe times more or leſs, will have every one to know by ſad experience, that he himſelf is a righteous ſin-hating God: that the Devil is a malicious ſoul-hunting enemy: that they themſelves are in a miſerable and forlorn condition without a multitude of tender mercy no way to be had but by a Chriſt. The Law ſpares none, and the Law-maker is a God of truth that will keep up the authority, and honour, of his own ſayings to a little. Oh! take the book of the Law in your hands then, and let the truth of that, ſtrike ſuch a terror into thee that may make thee to betake thy ſelf to the love and life of Chriſt with ſtrong cryes to ſave thee from the terror of that wrath that is to come.

If you will not hearken unto me and will not do all theſe Commandments. And if you ſhall deſpiſe my ſtatutes, or if your ſoul abhor my judgements, ſo that you will not do all my Commandments but that ye break my Covenant. I alſo will do this unto you: I will even appoint over you terror. Levit. 26.14, 15, 16.

If there be among you a root that beareth Gall and Wormwood, and it come to paſs when he heareth the words of this curſe, that he bleſs himſelf in his heart ſaying I ſhall have peace though I walk in the immagination of my heart to add drunkenneſs to thirſt: the Lord will not ſpare him but then the anger of the Lord and his jealouſie ſhall ſmoak againſt that man and all the curſes that are written in this book ſhall fly upon him, and the Lord ſhall blot out his name from under Heaven, and the Lord ſhall ſeperate him unto evil. Deut, 29.19, 20. According to all the curſes of the Covenant that are written in this book of the Law.

Becauſe I have called and you refuſed, I have ſtretched out my hand and no man regardeth, but ye have ſet at nought my councels and would none of my reproofes, I alſo will laugh at your calamity, I will mock when your Fear cometh. When your Fear cometh as deſolation, and your Deſtrection cometh as a whirle-wind, when Diſtreſs and Anguiſh cometh upon you, &c. Prov. 24 &c.

How expreſs is the holy Law of God? terror hath an appointed ſeaſon, diſtreſs and anguiſh lye in the Womb of time, God hath hi • vials of wrath: tribulation and anguiſh to powr ••• upon enery ſoul of man that doth evil. Rom. 2. 〈◊〉 and who knows what a day may bring forth. Prov. 27.1.

7. How many a time hath Hell-fire flaſhed in thy face already, and yet thou returneſt not? I mean how oft haſt thou found terror ſeizing upon thee at all times which, yet, thou haſt ſhaken off again. I can hardly believe there is any ſinner in the world that now ſinneth with the greateſt delight and freedom, but findeth that his way is beſet with dangers. I know not what may be ſaid of ſuch who live in Countryes where the word of God hath not been familiarly taught, the Apoſtle of the Gentiles ſeemeth to ſpeak the ſame thing plainly concerning them. Even they have witneſs bearing Conſciences, and thoughts the mean while accuſing, or elſe excuſing one another: Rom. 2.15. The Devils ſervants have an hard Apprentiſhip before they be made free. They ſin with much bondage before they come to ſin with delight. The ſpirit of God hath ſtriven with them, their own hearts have ſmitten them, ſecret warnings have they had within themſelves, oh! do not this thing which God hateth! now what do theſe things mean? why, they ſhew you what is like, nay ſure, to be the wages of ſin; that God will not be blamed when he ſhall ſentence you to an eternal bondage under his heavy wrath. He now would have frightned you out of your ſinful ſtate and you would not; he ſent his ſpirit to ſtrive with you, and wring your weapons of ſin out of your hands, and you would not let them go; he gave you ſome taſtes of the Cup of trembling; ſhook the full bottles of wrath before thy eyes, which he might have put to thy lips and held them faſt there until thou hadſt been overwhelmed with terrors. He drew his bow, and whet his ſword, that thou beholding that, mighteſt prepare thy ſe • f to eſcape the prepared inſtruments of death. So that poor ſinner; thou art not an utter ſtranger to the things that I am perſwading thee to think off, the terrors of God. Some ſmall appearances, may be, have been ſometime found in thee, upon commiſſion of ſome extraordinary ſin. Well, ſee to it, this is the bitter root which, though thou labour to bury it under the Earth a while, will without doubt ſpring up into a mighty tree bringing forth the fruits of ſhame, pain, and death.

8. Thou goeſt on merrily in the way of thine own heart labouring to ſuppreſs thy ſorrows at the firſt riſing. Thou haſt no thoughts of thy latter end, which thou ſmothereſt not in their very beginning. But remember, though thou feareſt not thy ſelf now upon the Earth, but thy danger is better thought off in Hell.

Oh I think with thy ſelf that the ſtory of d • mned D • v • s was not penned from the mouth of Chriſt in vain; Luke 16.27. &c. rather judge it to be, as indeed it is, an argument fetcht from Hell to carry thee over into the ways of Heaven. All thy old acquaintance and relations who (once, while they were in the Land of the living) ſpent their days in pleaſure, drawing thee on to uſe the good things that are now preſent; Wiſd. 2.6. &c. Come on let us fill our ſelves with coſtly wine and Ointments, and let no flower of the Spring paſs by us. Let us Crown our ſelves with Roſe-bud, before they be withered; let none of us go without his part of our jollity: let us leave tokens of our joyfulneſs in every place; for this is our portion, and our lot is this. Let us oppreſs the poor righteous man; let our ſtrength be the Law of juſtice; let us lye in wait for the righteous: becauſe he is not for our turn, he is clean contrary to our doings, he upbraideth us with our offending the Law: and objecteth to our infamy the tranſgreſſings of our education. He profeſſeth himſelf to have the knowledge of God, and he calleth himſelf the Child of the Lord; he was made to reprove our thoughts; he is grievous unto us even to behold: for his life is not like other mens, his ways are of another faſhion; we are eſteemed of him as counterfeit falſe come: he abſtaineth from our ways as from filthyneſs; he pronounceth the end of the juſt to be bleſſed, and maketh his boaſt that God is his Father; let us ſee if his words be true, and let us prove what ſhall happen in the end of him. For if the juſt man be the Son of God he will help him and deliver him from the hand of his enemies let us examine him with deſpightfulneſs and torture him that we may know his meekneſs and prove his patience let us condemn him with a ſhameful death, for by his own ſaying he ſhall be reſpected.

In contemplation, follow theſe boon Companions down to Hell, and you ſhall find them of another mind, Wiſd. 5.2. &c. There they ſhall be troubled with terrible fear, and ſhall be amazed at the ſtrangeneſs of the deſpiſed righteous mans ſalvation ſo farr beyond all that they looked for. And repenting and groaning within themſelves for anguiſh of ſpirit ſhall ſay. This was he whom we had ſometimes in deriſion and a Proverb of reproach we fools accounted his life madneſs and his end to be without honour. How is he numbred among the Children of God, and his lot is among the Saints? therefore have we erred from the right way, we wearied our ſelves in the way of wickedneſs and deſtruction; what hath Pride profitted us? or what good hath riches with our vaurting brought us? all thoſe things are paſſed as a ſhadow; and as a Poſt that haſteth away: and as a Ship that p • ſſeth over the waves of the water: or when as a bird hath flown through the air; or like an arrow ſhot at the mark, the trace of which cannot be found: even ſo we as ſoon as we were born, began to draw toward our end, and had no ſign of vertue to ſhew: but were conſumed in our own wickedneſs.

By this time the ſtout hearts of ſinners will be brought down, thoſe whom the evidence of truth (ſhining in the teſtimonies of the Prophets and Apoſtles) could not convince or convert from their evil words and ways, ſad experience will work upon; if they cannot remove their pains, fain would they diminiſh or prevent the increaſe of them. I pray thee Father Abraham that thou wouldeſt ſend to my Fathers houſe, for I have five brethren, leſt they alſo come into this place of torment, Luk. 16.27, 28.

For ſhame let not Hell have more charity then earth, thy old companions in the burning Lake would not by any means be troubled with the company of thee, whom they engaged and encouraged in evil ways, they have fins and ſorrows enough of their own without the addition of others to weight them down into everlaſting confuſion, here it may be ſome comfort (but an envious one) to have many companion in the like miſery but there (in Hell) 'tis nothing ſo.

Think then, ſhall thoſe that have been in the ſubburbs of Hell by ſpiritual deſertions, or thoſe who are really gone down thither never to return, wiſh me to look to it that I never come into that place of torment, and ſhall not I whom it moſt of all concerns, befriend my own pretious ſoul with a ſerious ſeaſonable conſideration of it's eternal danger? God forbid.

9. If thou wilt but now at laſt be willing it is more then poſſible thou maiſt be hid from or in the day of the Lords wrath.

Reſolve with thy ſelf fully that thou wilt now enter the ways that God, by the Goſpel of his Son, hath chalked out for the ways of peace, and walk therein, endure the troubles of an holy Life, ſhun not the ſpiritual worſhip of God; think not the griefs ariſing from true repentance; or the troubles, God (by wiſdom and love) ſhall permit Satan to inflict upon thee, to humble thee for thy paſt ſins, or patient paſſing through many tribulations, to be ſufficient cauſes to quarrel with God or his ways, or worſhip, or people, think not, oh think not God, the merciful God, the God who is Love, that he is an hard Maſter venture thy talent abroad, act what thou haſt for the glory of the giver; thou ſhalt not complain of thy returns of mercies. They ſhall be ſure, if not ſwift mercies that holineſs will entitle thee unto Iſ. 15.3. Thou maiſt be ſure where grace leads the Van, glory and peace ſhall bring up the Reer▪ Iſ. 52.12.

Complain not that thou wanteſt power to turn thy ſelf from ſin to holineſs; from ſelf to Jeſus Chriſt; from nature to grace, till thou haſt faithfully employed the power thou already haſt; if God hath made thee willing, he will not fail to make thee able, what is hard to the fleſh, ſhall be eaſie and delightful to the ſpirit, John. 14.6. the way thou walkeſt in, gives Life, Heb. 10 20. a Life of duty, and a Life of glory 'tis a living way.

But dally not overlong, ſay not within thy ſelf, ſhall I do it? muſt I leave my old ſins? when ſhall I begin? make no longer If's and And's, but be up and doing. Behold now is the accepted time, now is the day of ſalvation, 2 Cor 6.2. Let it alone till a little longer, and then a thouſand world will not afford an hiding place from the wrath to come.

10. I • God hath ſpared thee many years, not letting out his terrors upon thy ſoul for ſin, thou haſt no cauſe to flatter thy ſelf, but to tear the more, the longer terrors are in coming the more terrible when they come, and come they will one time or other.

As comforts long with-held from the child of God, come in greater abundance at the laſt ſo do terrors to the wicked. Lam. 3.27. In this ſence it is good to bear the yo ak •• n ones youth. Gods forbearance is no forgiveneſs, and greater muſt that fire be whoſe fuel hath been long in gathering, Rom. 2.5. Thou heapeſt up wrath againſt the day of wrath, long impenitency and hardneſs of heart, will make thy pile of ſuch a bulk, that when the breath of the Lord ſhall kindle it, who can quench it? two vials are always filling together, the one is here below, the other above, the vial of ſin, and the vial of wrath, or elſe the veſſel of grace and the veſſel of glory; look to it then, as theſe veſſels fill apace on earth, ſo do thoſe in Heaven, unhappy is that Soul whom God doth not take off from his work of filling up the meaſure of ſins, by pouring out the vials of his wrath while it is yet little. You flee from the pains of repentance to a merry Life, you do what you can to gag the mouth of conſcience to prevent your own diſturbance made by its loud cryes, lay aſide the Scriptures (as bankrupts do their books) leaſt too much ſearching ſhould beget ſadneſs, reproach the Godly man becauſe he is your reproof, do by the powerful painful Miniſters of Chriſt (as the ſtoried town of ſluggards did by their Smiths) drive them away that you may ſleep the longer, or in plain terms love darkneſs rather then light, leaſt you ſhould be reproved by the light, but ſilly worm! what art thou doing all this while? thou fl • eſt from the Adder and the Serpent will bite thee, thou fl • eſt from thy friend to an enemy; from the Lancings of a Chyrurgeon to the deadly wounds of an adverſary; from Gods way of healing thee by gentlet means, from pricking of thy heart; till a dart ſtrike through thy Liver, in a word, all thy care is to ſhift off preſent, needful, temporal, gentle correction and fatherly chaſtiſement, but this is not thy way, thou bleſſeſt thy ſelf with thoughts that thy conſcience ſhall never trouble thee; but it will not be, the longer God forbears to handle thee thou ſhouldſt fear the more. I have done what I could to employ the talent of my experience for thy profit. I know a wounded conſcience to be ſuch a Gueſt that no man can fall in Love with it, but rather then abide under an ignorant, flattering ſeared conſcience, let my portion be a wounded one, the next remove of this, may be, (yea ſhall be in every child of God; from horror to healing, peace and reſt, whereas the other labouring to avoid wounds here will fall into woe and a worſe condition for ever.

Do as you like, ſince it will be no otherwiſe. I for my part ſhall pray heartily with that good man, Lord here lance me! here burn me! here tear me? ſo thou ſpare me for ever.

THE END.