THey are a general Sea-Land. The great Bog of Eu­rope. There is not such another Marsh in the world; that's flat. They are an universall Quag­mire, [Page 2] Epitomiz'd, A green Cheese in pickle. There is in them an Aequilibrium of mud and water. A strong Earthquake would shake them to a Chaos, from which the successive force of the Sun, rather than Creation, hath a little e mended them. They are the Ingredients of a black pudding, and want only stirring together. Marry 'tis best making on't in a dry Summer, else you wil have more bloud than grist; and then have you no way to make it serve for any thing, but to tread it under Zona Torrida, and so dry it for Turfs. [Page 3] Sayes one, it affords the people one commodity beyond all the other Re­gions; if they dye in per­dition, they are so low, that they have a shorter cut to Hell than the rest of their neighbours. And for this cause, perhaps all strange Religions throng thither, as naturally in­clining towards their Cen­ter. Besides, their Riches shewes them to be Pluto's Region, and you all know what part that was which the Poets did of old assign him. Here is Styx, Ache­ron, Cocytus, and the rest of those muddy streames that have made matter for [Page 4] the Fablers. Almost eve­ry one is a Charon here, and if you have but a Nau­lum to give, you cannot want or Boat or Pilot. To confirm all, let but some of our Separatists be ask­ed, and they shall swear that the Elizian Fields are there.

It is an excellent Coun­try for a despairing Lover: for every corner affords him willow to make a Garlandon; but if justice doom him to be hang'd on any other tree, he may in spight of the sentence live long and confident. If he had rather quench his spi­rits than suffocate them, so [Page 5] rather chuse to feed Lob­sters than Crows; tis but leaping from his window, and he lights in a River or Sea; for most of their dwellings stand like pri­vies in moted houses, han­ging still over the water. If none of these cure him, keep him but a winter in a house without a stove, and that shall cool him.

The Soyl is all fat, though wanting the colour to shew it so; for indeed it is the buttock of the World, full of veines and bloud, but no bones in't. Had S. Steven been con­demn'd to suffer here, he might have been alive at [Page 6] this day; for unless it be in their paved Cities, gold is a great deal more plen­tiful than stones, except it be living ones, and then for their heaviness you may take in almost all the Na­tion.

Tis a singular place to fat Monkies in. There are Spiders as big as Shrimps, and I think as many. Their Gardens be­ing moist, abound with these. No creatures; for sure they were bred, not made, Were they but as venemous as rank, to gather herbs were to ha­zard Martyrdome. They are so large, that you [Page 7] would almost believe the Hesperides were here, and these the Dragons that did guard them.

You may travail the Country though you have not a guide: for you can­not baulk your road with­out the hazard of drow­ning. There is not there any use of a Harbinger. Wheresoever men go the way is made before them. Had they Cities large as their Walls, Rome would be esteemd a bable. Twen­ty miles in length is no­thing for a Waggon to be hurried on one of them, where if your fore-man be sober, you may travail in [Page 8] safety, otherwise, you must have stronger faith than Peter had, else you sink immediately. A starting horse indangers you to two deaths at once, brea­king of your neck, and drowning.

If your way be not thus, it hangs in the water, and at the Approach of your Waggon shall shake as if it were Ague-strooken. Duke D' Alva's taxing of the tenth penny frighted it into a Palsey, which all the Mountebanks they have bred since could never tell how to Cure.

'Tis indeed but a bridge of swimming earth, or a [Page 9] flagg somewhat thicker than ordinary, if the strings crack your course is short­ned, you can neither hope for Heaven nor fear Hell, you shall be sure to stick fast between them, Marry if your Faith flow Purga­tory height, you may pray if you will for that to clense you from the Mud shall soyl you.

Tis a green sod in water, where if the German Eagle dares to bath himself, he's glad again to pearch that he may dry his wings.

Some things they do that seem Wonders. 'Tis ordinary to see them fish for fire in water, which [Page 10] they Catch in nets and transport to land in their boats, Where they spread it more smoothly than a Mercer doth his Velvet when he would hook in an heir upon his comming to age. Thus lying in a field, you would think you saw a Cantle of Green Cheese' spread over with black butter.

If Aetna be hells mouth or fore-gate, sure here is found the Postern. 'Tis the Port-Esquiline of the world, where the full earth doth vent her crude black gore, which the Inhabi­tants scrape away for fuel, as men with spoones do [Page 11] excrements from Civit Cats.

Their ordinary pack­horses are all of wood, ca­ry their bridles in their tails, and their burdens in their bellies. A strong tyde and a stiff Gale are the spurs that make them speedy. When they tra­vel they touch no ground; and when they stand still they ride; and are never in danger but when they drink up too much of their way.

There is a Province a­mong them, where every woman carries a Cony in a Lambskin. 'Tis a custom and not one that travelse [Page 12] ver leaves it behind her. Now guess if you can what beast that is, which is clad in a fur both of hair and wool.

They dress their Meat in aqua Caelesti, for it springs not as ours from the Earth, but comes to them, as Manna to the Isra­elites, falling from heaven. This they keep under ground till it stinks, and then they pump it out a­gain for use. So when you wash your hands with one hand, you had need hold your nose with the other; for though it be not Cor­dial, 'tis certainly a strong water.

[Page 13] The Elements are here at variance, the subtile over swaying the grosser, The fire cōsumes the earth, and the air the water, they burn Turffs, and drain their grounds with Wind­mills; As if the Cholick were a remedy for the Stone; And they would prove against Philosophy the Worlds Conflagration to be natural, evē shewing thereby that the very Ele­ment of Earth is Combu­stible.

The land that they have they keep as neatly as a Courtier does his Beard. They have a Method in mowing. Tis so inter­vein'd [Page 14] with Waters and Rivers, that it is impossi­ble to make a Common a­mong them. Even the Brownists are here ata stād, only they hold their pride in wrangling for that which they never wil find. Our Justices would be much at ease although our English poor were still a­mong them: For what­soever they do they can break no hedges. Sure had the wise men of Gotham lived here, they would have studyed some other death for their Cuckow.

Their Ditches they frame as they list; and di­stinguish them into nooks, [Page 15] as my Lord Majors Cook doth his Custards. Clense them they do often; but 'tis as Physicians give their potions, more to catch the fish, than cast the Mud out.

Though their Country be part of a mainland, yet every house almost stands in an Island. And that though a Boor dwell in it, looks as smug, as a Lady that hath newly lockt up her colours, and laid by her srons. A gallant mas­quing suit sits not more compleat, than a Coat of thatch though of many years wearing.

If it stand dry 'tis imbra­ced [Page 16] by Vines, as if it were against the nature of a Dutch-man not to have Bacchus his neighbour. If you find it lower seated, 'tis only a close Arto rin a plump of Willowes and Alders; pleasant enough while the Dog-daies last; But those past once, you must practise wading, or be prisoner till the next spring. Only a hard frost, with the help of a sledge, may release yon.

The Bridge to this is an outlandish plank with a box of Stones to poize it withall, which with the least help turns round, like the Executioner when he [Page 17] whips off a head. That when the Master is over, stands drawn, and then he is in his Castle.

Tis sure his fear that renders him suspitious. That he may therefore certainly see who enters, you shal ever find his win­dow made over his door. But it may be that is to shew you his Pedigree; for though his Ancestors were never known, their Arms are there; which (in spight of Heraldry) shall bear their Atchievment with a Helmet for a Baron at least. Marry the Field perhaps shall be charged with 3. basquets, to shew what [Page 18] trade his father was.

Escutcheons are as plen­tifull as Gentry is scarce. Every man there is his own Herald; and he that has but wit enough to in­vent a Coat, may challenge it as his own.

When you are entred the house, the first thing you encounter is a Look­ing glass. No question but a true Embleme of po­litick hospitality; for though it reflect your self in your own figure, tis yet no longer than while you are there before it. When you are gone once, it flat­ters the next commer, without the least remem­brance [Page 19] that you ere were there.

The next are the vessels of the house marshalled a­bout the room like watch­men. All as neat as if you were in a Citizens wives Cabinet; for unless it be themselves, they let none of Gods creatures lose a­ny thing of their native beauty.

Their houses, especi­ally in their Cities, are the best eye-beauties of their Country. For cost and sight they far exceed our English, but they want their magnificence. Their lining is yet more rich than their out-side; [Page 20] not in hangings, but pi­ctures, which even the poorest are there fur-nishtwith. Not a cobler but has his toyes for orna­ment. Were the knacks of all their houses set toge­ther, there would not be such another Bartholmew-Fair in Europe.

Their Artists for these are as rare as thought; for they can paint you a fat hen in her feathers; and if you want the language, you may learn a great deal of Dutch by their signes; for what they are they ever write under them. So by this device hang up more honesty than they keep.

[Page 21] Coaches are as rare as Comets; and those that live loosely need not fear one punishment, which often vexes such with us: They may be sure, though they be discovered, they shall not be carted.

All their Merchandise they draw through the streets on Sledges; or as we on Hurdles do traitors to execution.

Their rooms are but se­verall land boxes: if so, you must either goe out to spit, or blush when you see the Map brought.

Their beds are no other than land-cabines, high enough to need a ladder [Page 22] or stairs. Up once, you are walled in with wain­scot, and that is good dis­cretion to avoid the trou­ble of making your Will every night; for once fal­ling out else would break your neck perfectly. But if you die in it, this com­fort you shall leave your friends, that you dy'de in clean linnen.

Whatsoever their e­states be, their houses must be fair. Therefore from Amsterdam they have ba­nisht sea-cole, lest it soyl their buildings, of which the starelier sort are some­times sententious, and in the front carry some con­ceit [Page 23] of the Owner. As to give you a taste in these.

Every door seems stud­ded with Diamonds. The nailes and hinges hold a constant brightness, as if rust there were not a qua­lity incident to iron. Their houses they keep cleaner than their bodies; their bodies than their soules. Goe to one you shall finde the Andirons shut up in net work. At a second, the warming pan [Page 24] muffled in Italian Cut­work. At a third the Sconce clad in Cambrick. And like a Crown advan­ced in the middle of the house, for the woman there is the head of the husband, so takes the horn to her own charge, which she sometimes mul­tiplies, and bestowes the increase on her man.

Tis true, they are not so ready at this play as the English; for neither are they so generally bred to't, nor are their men such linnen-lifters. Idleness and Courtship has not banish't honesty. They speak more, and doe less; yet [Page 25] doth their blood boil high and their veins are full, which argues strongly that' when they will they may take up the custome of entertaining strangers. And having once done it, I believe they will be no­table, for I have heard they trade more for love than money, but 'tis of the sport not the man, and therefore when they like the pastime they will reward the Gamester; o­therwise their gross feed and clownish breeding hath spoiled them for be­ing nobly minded. And if you once in publick dis­cover her private favours [Page 26] or pretend to more than is civil, she falls off like fairy wealth disclosed, and turns like beer with lightning to a sowreness, which neither Art nor la­bour can ever make sweet again.

But this I must give you on report only; experience herein hath neither made me fool nor wise.

The people are generally Boorish; yet none but may be bred to a Statesman, they having all this gift not to be so nice-consci­enced but that they can turn out religion, to let in policy.

Their Countrey is the [Page 27] God they worship. War is their Heaven. Peace is their Hell, and the Spa­niard is the Devil they hate. Custome is their Law, and their will rea­son.

You may sooner con­vert a Jew than make an ordinary Dutch-man yield to Arguments that cross him. An old Baud is ea­silyer turned Puritan, than a Waggoner perswaded not to bait thrice in nine miles. And when he doth, his horses must not stirre, but have their manger brought them in­to the way, where in a top-sweat they eat their [Page 28] grass, and drink their water, and presently after hurry away. For they e­ver drive as if they were all the sonnes of Nimishi, and were furiously either pursuing an enemy or fly­ing him.

His spirits are generat­ed from the English Beer, and that makes him head­strong. His body is built of pitckled Herring. And they render him testy: these with a little Butter, Onyons & Holland Cheese are the ingredients of an ordinary Dutchman; which a voyage to the East-In­dies, with the heat of the Equinoctiall Consolidates.

[Page 29] If you see him fat he hath been rooting in a Cabbage ground and that bladdered him. View­ing him naked you will pray him to pull of his Masque and Gloves, or wish him to hide his face, that he may appear more lovely. For that and his hands are Aegypt, howe­ver his body be Europe. He hath exposed them so much to the Sun and wa­ter as he is now his own disguise, and without a Vizard may serve in any Antimasque you put him in.

For their Condition they are Churlish as their [Page 30] breeder Neptune: and with­out doubt very antient; for they were bred before manners were in fashion. Yet all they have not, they account superfluity, which they say mendeth some, and marreth many.

They should make good Justices; for they respect neither persons nor appa­rell. A boor in his liquord slop shall have as much good use as a Courtyer in his bravery; Nay more; for he that is but Courtly or Gentile, is among them like a Merlyn after Mich­aelmas in the field with Growes. They wonder at and envy; but worship no [Page 31] such Images. Marry with a Silver hook you shall catch these Gudgeons pre­sently. The love of gain being to them as naturall as water to a Goose, or Carrion to any Kite that flies.

They are seldome de­ceived; for they trust no body; so by consequence are better to hold a fort than win it; yet they can do both. Trust them you must if you travel. For to ask a Bill of particulars is to purre in a Waspes nest; you must pay what they ask as sure as if it wereth' assesment of a Sub­sidy.

[Page 32] Complement is an idle­nes they were never train­ed up in, and 'tis their happiness that Court va­nities have not stole away their minds from busi­ness.

Their being Sailors and Souldiers have marred 2 parts already, if they bath once in Court oile they are painted Trapdores. And shall then let the Jewes build a City whe e Harlem Mere is and after cosen 'em on't.

They shall abuse a stran­ger for nothing, andafter a few base terms scotch one an other to a Carbonado, or as they do their Roaches [Page 33] when they fry them.

Nothing can quiet them but money and liberty, yet when they have them they abuse both; but if you tell them so you awake their fury; and you may sooner calm the Sea than conjure that into compass again. Their anger hath no eyes. And their judge­ment doth not flow so much from reason as passi­on and partiality.

They are in a manner all Aquatiles: and there­fore the Spaniard calls them Water Dogges. To this though you need not condiscend; yet with-all you may think they [Page 34] can catch you a duck as soon. Sea-Gulls do not swim more readily: nor More hens from their nest run sooner to the water. Every thing is so made to swim among them, as it is a question if Elizeus his Ax were now floating there, it would be taken for a miracle.

They love none but those that do for them; and when they leave off, they neg­lect them. They have no friends but their kindred; which at every wedding, feast among themselves like Tribes.

All that help them not, they hold popish; and take [Page 35] it for an argument of much honesty to rail bit­terly against the King of Spain. And certainly this is the badge of an ill Na­ture, when they have once cast off the yoke, to be most virulent against those to whom of right they owe respect and ser­vice. Grateful dispositi­ons, though by theirLords they be exempt from ser­vice, will yet be paying reverence and affection. I am confident that had they not been once the Subjects of Spain, they would have loved the na­tion better. But now cut of dying Duties ashes all [Page 36] the Blazes of hostility and flame. And tis sufficien ground to contemn their eternal hate, to know the world remembers, they were once the lawful sub­jects of that most Catho­lique Crown.

Their shipping is the Babel which they boast on for the glory of their Na­tion. Tis indeed a won­der, and they will have it so. But we may well hope they will never be so mighty by Land, least they shew us how dogged­ly they can insult where they get the mastery.

Tis their own Chro­nicle business, which can [Page 37] tell you that at the Seige of Leyden, a Fort being held by the Spanish, by the Dutch was after taken by Assault. The Defendants were put to the sword, where one of the Dutch in the fury of the slaughter, ript up the Captains body, and with a barbarous hand tore out the yet liv­ing heart panting among the reeking bowels, then with his teeth rent it still warm with blood into gobbets, which he spit­ted over the battlements, in defiance to the rest of the Army.

Oh Tigers breed! The Scythian-Bear could nere [Page 38] have been more savage, To be necessitated into cruelty, is a misfortune to the strongly tempted to it; but to let spleen rave, and mad it in resistless blood, shewes nature steepd i'th livid gall of pas­sion; and beyond all bru­tishness displays the unno­ble tyranny of a prevail­ing Coward.

Their Navies are the whip of Spain, or the Arm wherewith they pull away his Indies. Nature hath not bread them so active for the land as some others: But at Sea they are water-Devils, to attempt things incredible.

[Page 39] In Fleets they can fight close, and rather hazard all then save some, while others perish: but single, they will flag and fear like birds in a bush when the Sparrow-Hauks bells are heard.

A Turkish man of War is as dreadfull to them as a a Falcon to a Mallard; from whom their best re­medy is to steal away. But if they come to blowes, they want the valiant stoutness of the English, who will rather expire bravely in a bold resistāce, than yield to the lasting slavery of becoming cap­tives to so barbarous an e­nemy. [Page 40] And this shews they have not learned yet even Pagan Philosophy, which ever preferred an honourable death before a life thralled to perpetuall slavery.

Their ships ly like high woods in Winter: And if you view them on the Northside you friez with­out hope, for they ride so thick, that you can through them see no Sun to warm you with.

Sailers among them are as common as beggars with us. They can drink, rail, swear, niggle, steal, and be lowsie alike; but exami­ning their use, a mess of [Page 41] their Knaves are worth a million of ours: for they in a boisterous rudeness can work, and live, and toil, whereas ours will ra­ther laze themselves to po­verty; and like Cabages left out in winter, rot a­way in the loathsomeness of a nauseous sloth.

Almost all among them are Seamen born, and like frogs can live both on land and water. Not a Coun­try Uriester but can han­dle an oar, steer a boat, raise a mast, and bear you out in the roughest streights you come in. The ship she avouches much better for sleep than a bed. [Page 42] Being full of humours, that is her cradle, which luls and rocks her to a dull phlegmatickness, most of them looking like a full grown oyster boild. Slime, humid air, water, and wet dyet, have so bagg'd their cheeks, that some would take their paunches to be gotten above their chin.

The Countries govern­ment is a Democracy, and there had need be many to rule such a rabble of rude ones. Tell them of a King, and they could cut your throat in earnest. The very name carries servitude in it, and they hate it more than [Page 43] a Jew doth Images, a Wo­man old age, or a Non-Conformist a surplice.

None among them hath Authority by inheritance, that were the way in time to parcel out their Coun­trie to Families: They are chosen all as our Kings chuse Sheriffs for the Counties: not for their sin of Wit, but for the Wealth they have to bear it out withall; which they so over-affect that MynHere shall walk the Streets as Usurers go to Baudy hou­ses, all alone and melan­cholie. And if they may be had cheap, he will daub his faced cloke with [Page 44] two penni-worth of pick­led Herrings which him­self shall carrie home in a string. A common voice hath given him prehemi­nence, & he loses it by liv­ing as he did when he was but a Boor. But if you par­don what is past, they are about thinking it time to learn more civilitie.

Their justice is strict if it cross not Policie: but rather than hinder Traf­fique tollerates any thing.

There is not under hea­ven such a Den of several Serpents as Amsterdam is, you may be what Devil you will, so you push not the State with your horns.

[Page 45] Tis an University of all Religions, which grow here confurdly (like stocks in a Nursery) without either order or pruning. If you be unsettled in your Religion, you may here trie all, and take at last what you like best. If you fancie none, you have a pattern to follow, of two, that would be a Church by themselves.

Tis the Fair of all the Sects, where all the Ped­lers of Religion have leave to vent their toies, their Ribands, and pha­natick Rattles. And should it be true it were a cruel brand which Romists [Page 46] stick upon them. For (say they) as the Chameleon changes into all Colours but white: so they admit of all Religions but the True. For the Papist only may not exercise his in publick Yet his restraint they plead is not in hatred but justice: because the Spaniard a­bridges the Protestant. And they had rather shew a lit­tle spleen, than not cry quit with their Enemy. His act is their Warrant; which the [...] [...]etaliat justly. And for this reason rather than the Dunkirks they take shall not dy, Amster­dam having none of their own, shall borrow a hang­man [Page 47] from Harlem.

Now albeit the Papists do them wrong herein, yet can it not excuse their boundles Tolleration, which shews they place their Re­publick in a higher esteem than Heaven it self and had rather cross upon God than it. For whosoever disturbs the Civil Govern­ment is lyable to punish­ment: But the Decrees of Heaven. and Sanctions of the Deity, any one may break uncheck'd, by prosessing what false Reli­gion he please. So Consu­lary Rome of old, brought all the Straggling Gods of other Nations to the City, [Page 48] where blinded superstiti­on paid an Adoration to them.

In their Families they all are equals, and you have no way to know the ma­ster and Mistress, but by taking them in bed toge­ther. It may be those are they: Otherwise Malky can prate as much, laugh as loud, be as bold, and sit as well as her Mistress.

Had Logicians lived here first, Father and Son had never passed so long for Relatives. They are here Individuals, for no De­monstrance of Duty or Authority can distinguish them, as if they were cre­ated [Page 49] together, and not born successively. And as for your Mother, bidding her goodnight, and kissing her, is punctual blessing.

Your man shal be saucy, and you must not strike; if you do, he shall com­plain to the Schont, and perhaps have recompence. T is a dainty place to please boies in: for your Father shall bargain with your School-Master not to whip you: if he doth, he shall revenge it with his knife, and have Law for it.

Their apparel is civil e­nough and good enough: but very uncomely; and hath usually more stuffthan [Page 50] shape. Only their Huykes are commodious in win­ter: but tis to be lament­ed, that they have not wit enough to lay them by when summer comes.

Their women would have good faces if they did not mar them with mak­ing. Their Ear-wyers have so nipt in their Cheeks, that you would think some Faiery, to do them a mischief, had pincht them behind with Tongs. These they dress, as if they would shew you all their wit lay behind, and they needs would cover it. And thus ordered, they have much more forehead than face.

[Page 51] They love the English Gentry well; and when Souldiers come over to be billetted among them, they are Emulous in chu­sing of their guest, who fares much the better for being liked by his Hostess.

Men and Women are there starched so blew, that if they once grow old, you would verily believe you saw Winter walking up to the neck in a Barrel of In­digo: And therefore they rail at England for spend­ing no more Blewing.

Your men among them is elseclad tolerably, unless he enclines to the Sea-fa­shion: and then are his [Page 52] breeches, yawning at the knees, as if they were a­bout to swallow his legs unmercifully.

They are far there from going Naked, for of a whole woman you can see but half a face. As for her hand that shews her a sore Labourer; which you shall ever find as it were in recompence loaden with Rings to the crack­ing of her fingers. If you look lower Shee's a Monkey chain'd about the Middle, and had rather want it in diet, than not have silver links to hang her keyes in.

Their Gowns are fit to [Page 53] hide great Bellies, but they make them shew so unhansome that men do not care for getting them. Mary this you shall find to their commendation, their smocks are ever whiter than their skin.

Where the Women lyes in, the Ringle of the door does penance, and is lap­ped about with linnen, ei­ther to shew you that loud knocking may wake the child; Or else that for a moneth the Ring is not to be run at. But if the child be dead there is thrust out a Nosegay tyed to a sticks end; Perhaps for an em­blem of the life of man, [Page 54] which may wither as soon as born; or else to let you know, that though these fade, upon their ga­thering, yet from the same stock the next year a new shoot may spring.

You may rail at us for often changing; but I assure you with them is a great deal more following the fashion; which they will plead for as the ignorant Laity for their faith. They will keep it because their Ancestors lived in it. Thus they will rather keep an old fault though they dis­cover errors in it, than in an easiy change to meet a Certain Remedy. [Page 55] For their dyet, they eat much and spend little: when they set out a Fleet to the Indies, It shall live three moneths on the Offals, which we here fear would surfeit our swine: yet they feed on't, and are still the same Dutchmen.

In their houses Roots and stock-fish are staple­commodities. If they make a feast & ad flesh, they have art to keep it hot more daies, than a Pigs-head in Py Corner. Salt meats, and sowre Cream, they hold him a fool that loves not, only the last they correct with Sugar, and [Page 56] are not half so well plea­sed with having it sweet at first, as with letting it sowre that they may swee­ten it again, as if a wo­man were not half so plea­sing being easily won, as after a scolding fit she coms by man to be calm'd again.

Fish indeed they have brave and plentiful; and herein practice hath made them Cooks as good as ere Lucullus his latter Kitchin had, which is some recom­pence for their wilfulness, for you can neither pray nor buy them to alter their own Cookery.

To a feast they come [Page 57] readily, but being set once you must have patience. They are longer eating meat than we preparing it. If it be to supper you con­clude timely when you get away by day-break. They drink down the evening Starre, and drink up the morning Starre. At those times it goes hard with a stranger, all in curtesie will be drinking to him, and all that do so he must pledge: till he doth, the fill'd Cupps circle round his Trencher, from whence they are not taken away till emptyed. For though they give you day for pay­ment, yet they will not a­bate [Page 58] the sum.

They sit not there as we in England, men together, and women first, But e­ver intermingled with a man between; and instead of March panes, and such juncates, tis good Manners if any be there, to carry away a piece of Apple Py in your pocket.

The time they there spend, is in eating well, in drinking much, and prating most. For the truth is, the Compleatest drinker in Europe is your English Gallant. There is no such Consumer of li­quor as the Quaffing off of his Healths. Time was [Page 59] the Dutch had the better of it; but of late he hath lost it by prating too long over his pot. He sips, and laughs, and tells his tale, and in a Tavern is more prodigal of his time, than his Wine. He drinks as if he were short winded; and as it were eates his drink by morsels, rather besieging his brains then assaulting them. But the English man charges home on the sudden, swallowes it whole, and like a hasty tide, fills, and flowes him­self, till the mad brain swims, and tosses on the hasty fume. As if his Liver were burning out his sto­mach, [Page 60] and he striving to quench it, drowns it. So the one is drunk sooner, and the other longer. As if striving to recover the wa­ger, the Dutchman would still be the perfectest so­ker.

In this Progress you have seen some of their Vices, now view a Fairer Ob­ject.

For PROVIDENCE they are the Pismires of the World: and having no­thingbut [Page 62] whatgrafs affords them; are yet for almost all Provisions, the Store­house of the whole of Chri­stendome. What is it which there may not be found in plenty? They making by their industry all the fruits of the vast Earth their own. What Land can boast a privilcgethat they do not partake of? They have not of their own enough ma­terials to compile one ship; Yet how many Nations do they furnish? The remo­ter angles of the world do by their pains deliver them their sweets. And being of themselves in want, their diligence hath [Page 63] made them both Indies neerer home.

They are frugal to the saving of Eg. shels, and maintain it for a Maxime, that a thing lasts longer mended than new.

Their Cities are their Mole-hills; Their Schutes and Flyboats, creep and return with their store for Winter. Every one is busie and carries his grain; as if every City were a sever­all Hive, and the Bees not permitting a drone to in­habit. For idle persons must find some other man­sion. And lest necessity bereave men of means to set them on Work, there [Page 64] are publique Banks that (without use) lend upon pawns to all the poor that want.

There is a season when the Pismires fly, and so each Summer they likewise Swarm abroad with their Armies.

The Ant sayes one, is a wiseCreature, but a shrewd thing in a Garden or Or­chard. And truly so are they; For they look upon others too little, and upon themselves too much. And wheresoever they light in a pleasant or rich soyl, like suckers and lower plants, they rob from the root of that tree which gives them [Page 65] shade and protection, so their wisdome is not in­deed Heroick or Numnial; as Courting an Universall Good; But rather narrow and restrictive; As being a wisdome but for them­selves. Which to speak plainly, is descending into Craft; and is but the sini­ster part of that which is really Noble and Coelesti­all.

Nay in all they hold so true a proportion with the Emmet, as you shall not find they want so much as the sting.

For dwelling in Rocks they are Conies. And while the Spanish tumbler [Page 66] playes about them, they rest secure in their own in­accessible Berries. Where have you under heaven, such impregnable Fortifi­cations? Where Art beau­tifies Nature, and Nature makes Art invincible: Herein indeed they differ; The Conies find Rocks, and they make them. And as they would invert the miracle of Moses, They raise them in the bosome of the waves. Where with­in these twenty years, ships furrowed in the pathlesOcean, the peace­full plough now unbowels the fertile earth, which at night is carried home to [Page 67] the fairest Mansions in Hol­land.

Every Town hath his Garrison: and the keyes of the Gates in the night­time, are not trusted but in the State-house. From these holds they bolt a­broad for provisions, and then return to their fast­neses replenished.

For war they are Grass­hoppers, & without a King, go forth in bands to con­quer Kings. They have not only defended themselves at their own home, but have braved the Spaniard at his. In Anno 1599, un­der the command of Van­der Does, was the Grand [Page 68] Canary taken. The chief City sackt; the King of Spain's Ensigns taken down, and the colours of his Excellency set up in their room. In the year 1600 the battel of Nieuport was a gallant piece, when with the loss of a thousand or little more, they slew 7000 of their Enemies, took above a 100 Ensigns, the Admirall of Arragon a prisoner. The very furniture of the Arch Duke's own chamber and Cabinet, yea the signet that belonged to his hand.

In 1607. they assailed the Armado of Spain in the Bay of Gibraeltar, under [Page 69] covert of the Castle and Towns Ordnance, and with the loss of 150, slew above 2000, and ruined the whole Fleet. Certain­ly a bolder attempt hath ever scarce been done. The Indian Mastiff never was more fierce a gainst the an­gry Lion. Nor can the Cock in his crowing valour, be­come more prodigall of his blood than they.

There hardly is upon earth such a school of Mar­tiall Discipline. Tis the Christian worlds Academy for Arms; whither all the the neighbour-Nations re­sort to be instructed; where they may observe [Page 70] how unresistable a blow, many small grains of pow­der will make being heap­ed together, which yet if you separate, can do no­thing but sparkle and die.

Their recreation is the practice of Arms; And they learn to be souldiers sooner than men. Nay as if they placed a Religion in Arms, every Sunday is concluded with the train'd Band's marching thorough their Cities.

For industry, they are Spiders, and are in the Pa­laces of Kings. Of old they were the guard of the per­son of the Roman Emperor, And by the Romans them­selves [Page 71] declared to be their friends and companions. There is none have the like intelligence; Their Mer­chants are at this day the greatest of the Universe. What Nation is it where they have not insinua­ted? Nay, which they have not almost anatomized, and even discovered the very intrinsick veins on't?

Even among us, they shame us with their indu­stry, which makes them seem as if they had a facul­ty from the worlds Crea­tion, out of water to make dry land appear. They win our drowned grounds which we cannot recover, [Page 72] and chase back Neptune to his own old Banks.

All that they do is by such labour as it seems ex­tracted out of their own bowels. And in their wary thrift, they hang by such a slender sustentation of life, that one would think their own weight should be enough to crack it.

Want of Idleness keeps them from want. And tis their Diligence makes them Rich.

A fruitfull Soil encrea­seth the Harvest. A plen­tifull Sunne augmenteth the Store; and seasonable showres drop fatness on the Crop we reap. But [Page 73] no Rain fructifies more than the dew of Sweat.

You would think being with them you were in old Israel, for you find not a begger among them. Nor are they mindfull of their own alone; but strangers also partake of their Care and Bounty. If they will depart, they have money for their Convoy. If they stay, they have work pro­vided. If unable, they find an Hospitall. Their Providence extends even from the Prince to the catching of flies. And lest you lose an afternoon by fruitless mourning, by two of the clock all Buri­als [Page 74] must end. Wherein to prevent the wast of ground, they pile Coffin upon Coffin till the Sepul­chre be full.

In all their Manufactures they hold a truth and con­stancy: for they are as fruits from Trees, the same every year that they are at first; Not Apples one year and Crabs the next; and so for ever af­ter. In the sale of these they also are at a word, they will gain rather than exact; and have not that way whereby our Citizens abuse wise, and cozen the ignorant; and by their Infinite over-asking for [Page 75] commodities proclaim to the world that they would cheat all if it were in their power.

The Depravation of Manners they punish with Contempt, but the Defects of Nature they favor with Charity. Even their Bedlam is a place so curious, that a Lord might live in it; Their Hospital might lodge a Lady: So that safely you may conclude, amongst them, even Poverty and Madness do both inhabit handsomly. And though Vice makes every thing turn sordid, yet the State will have the very Correc­tion of it to be neat, as if [Page 76] they would shew that though obedience fail, yet Government must be still it self, and decent. To prove this they that do but view their Bridewell will think it may receive a Gentleman though a Gal­lant. And so their prison a wealthy Citizen. But for a poor man tis his best policy to be laid there, for he that cast him in must maintain him.

Their Language though it differ from the higher Germany, yet hath it the same ground, and is as old as Babel. And albeit harsh, yet so lofty and full a Tongue as made Goropius [Page 77] Becanus maintain it for the speech of Adam in his Pa­radise. And surely if there were not other reasons a­gainst it, the significancy of the Antient Teutonick might carry it from the primest Dialect. Stevin of Bruges reckons up 2170 Monasillables, which being compounded, how richly do they grace a Tongue? A Tongue that for the ge­neral profession is extend­ed further than any that I know. Through both the Germanies, Denmark, Nor­way, Sweden, and some­times France, England, Spain. And still among us all our old words are [Page 78] Dutch, with yet so little Change, that certainly it is in a manner the same that it was 2000 years ago, without the too much Mingled Borrowings of their neighbour Nati­ons.

The Germans are a peo­ple that more than all the world I think may boast sincerity, as being for some thousands of years a pure and unmixed people. And surely I see not but their conduction by Tuisco from the building of Babel, may passas unconfuted Story, they yet retaining the Ap­pellation from his Name.

They are a large and [Page 79] numerous people having ever kept their own, and transported Colonies into other Nations. In Italy were the Longobards; In Spain the Gothes and Van­dalls; In France the Franks or Franconians; In Eng­land the Saxons: having in all these left reverend Steps of their Antiquity and Language.

It is a noble Testimony that so grave an Historian as Tacitus hath left still ex­tant of them, and wri­ten above fifteen hundred years ago. Deliberant dum fingere nesciunt: Constitu­unt dum errare non possunt. They deliberate when [Page 80] they cannot dissemble: and resolve when they cannot erre.

Two hundred and ten years he reckons the Ro­mans were in conquering them. In which space on either side were the losses sad and fatal. So as nei­ther the Samnites, the Car­thaginians, the Spaniards, the Gaules, no nor the Par­thians ever troubled them like the Germans. They slew and took prisoners several Commanders of the highest rank, as Carbo, Cassius, S. Caurus Aureli­us, Cervilius Cepio, and M. Manlius. They defea­ted five Consulary Armies, [Page 81] and Varus with three legions, yet after all this he concludes, Tri­umphati Magis quam victi sunt, They were rather Triumphed over than conquered. To confirm this, the keeping of their own language is an argu­ment unanswerable. The change whereof ever fol­lows upon the fully van­quished, as we may see it did in Italy, France, Spain, England.

And this he speaks of the Nation in General. Nor was the opinion of the Romans less worthy in par­ticular concerning these lower Provinces which [Page 82] made them for their va­lor and warlike minds, stile them by the name of Gallia Belgica, and espe­cially of the Batavians, which were the Hollanders and part of Guelders. You may hear in what honora­ble terms he mentions them, where speaking of the several people of Ger­many he saies, Omniumha­ram Gentium virtute praeci­pui Batavi. Nam nec tributis contemnuntur nec publica­nus atterit: exempti one­ribus & Collationibus, et tan­tum in usum praeliorum se­positi, velut tela atque Ar­ma Bellis reservantur. Of all these Nations the prin­cipal [Page 83] in valiant vertue are the Batavians: for neither are they become de spica­ble by paying of Tribute, nor oppressed too much by the Farmor of publick Revenues; but free from Taxes and Contributions of servility; they are spe­cially set apart for the fight, as Armour and Weapons only reserv'd for War.

All this even at this day they seem to make good: For of all the world, they are the people that thrive and grow rich by the war, like the Poropisce that plays in the storm, but at o­ther times keeps sober un­der [Page 84] the water.

War, which is the worlds ruin, and ravins upon the beauty of all, is to them Prosperity and Ditation. And surely the reason of this is their strength in shipping, the open Sea, their many fortified Towns, and the Coun­try by reason of its lowness and plentifull Irriguation becoming unpassable for an army when the winter but approaches. Other­wise it is hardly possible that so small a parcell of Mankind, should brave the most potent Monarch of Christendome, who in his own hands holds the [Page 85] Mines of the wars sinews, Money, and hath now got a command so wide, that out of his Dominions the Sunne can neither rise nor set.

The whole seventeen Provinces are not above a thousand English miles in circuit. And in the States hands there is not seven of those. Yet have they in the field sometimes 60000 Souldiers, besides those which they alwaies keep in Garrison, which can­not be but a considerable number neer thirty thou­sand more. There being in the whole Countries above two hundred wall'd [Page 86] Towns & Cities. So that if they have People for the War, one would wonder where they should get mo­ney to pay them; They being when they have an Army in the field at a thousand pound a day charge extraordinary.

To maintain this, their Excize is an unwasted Mine, which with the In­finitness of their Trafick, and their untired Indu­strie, is by every part of the World in something or other Contributed to.

The Sea yields them by two sorts of Fish only, Her rings and Cod, [...] sixty thou­sand pound per annum; for [Page 87] which they go out some times seven or eight hun­dred boats at once, and for greater ships they are able to set out double the num­ber.

Their Merchandise a­mounted in Guicciardines time to fourteen Millions per Annum. Whereas Eng­land which is in compass almost as large again, and hath the Ocean as a Ring about her, made not above six Millions yearly: so sedulous are these Bees to labour and inrich their Hive.

As they on the Sea, so the women are busie on Land in weaving of Nets, [Page 88] and helping to add to the heap. And though a hus­bands long absence might tempt them to lascivious wayes: yet they hate a­dultery, and are resolute in Matrimonial chastity. I do not remember that e­ver I read in Story, of any great Lady of that nation, that hath been tax'd with looseness. And question­less tis their everbeing bu­sie makes them not have leisure for lust.

Tis idleness that is Cu­pids Nurse; but business breaks his Bow, and makes his Arrowes use­less.

They are both Mer­chants [Page 89] and Farmers. And there act parts, which men can but discharge with us. As if they would shew that the Soul in all is mas­culine, and not varied in­to weaker sex as are the bodies that they wear a­bout them.

Whether this be from the nature of their Coun­try, in which if they be not laborious they cannot live; or from an Innate Genius of the people by a Superiour Providence ad­apted to them of such a situation; from their own inclination addicted to parsimony; from cu­stome in their way of bree­ding; [Page 90] from any Transcen­dency of active parts more than other Nations; or from being in their Country, like people in a City besieged, whereby their own vertues do more compact and fortifie; I will not determine. But certainly in generally they are the most painfull and diligent people on earth: And of all other the most truly of Vesp asians opinion, to think, that Exre qua­libet bonus odor lucri; Be it raised from what it will, the smell of gain is plea­sant.

Yet they are in some sort Gods, for they fet [Page 91] bounds to the Sea: and when they list let it pass them. Even their dwel­ling is a miracle. They live lower than the fishes. In the very lap of the floods, and incircled in their watry Arms. They are the Israelites passing through the Red Sea. The waters wall in them, and if they set open their sluces shall drown up their enemies.

They have strugled long with Spains Pharoah, and they have at length in­forced him to let them go. They are a Gideons Army upon the march again. They are the Indian Rat, [Page 92] knawing the Bowels of the Spanish Crocodile, to which they got when he gap'd to swallow them. They are a serpentwreathed about the legs of that Elephant They are the little sword fish piicking the bellies of the Whale. They are the wane of that Empire, which in­creas'd in Isabella, and in Charles the 5th. was at full.

They are a glass wherein Kings may see that though they be Soveraigns over lives and goods, yet when they usurpe upon Gods part, and will be Kings o­ver conscience too, they are somtimes punisht with [Page 93] loss of that which lawfully is their own. That Reli­gion too fiercely urg'd is to stretch a string till it not onely jars, but cracks; and in the breaking, whips (perhaps) the streiners eye out.

That an extreme taxa­tion is to take away the hony, while the Bees keep the Hive, whereas he that would take that, should first either burn them, or drive them out. That Tyrants in their Govern­ment, are the greatest Traitors to their own States. That a desire of be­ing too absolute is to walk upon Pinacles and the tops [Page 94] of Pyramides, where not only the footing is full of hazard, but even the sharpness of that they tread on may runne into their foot and woundthem. That too much to regrate on the patience of but tickle Sub­jects, is to press a thorne till it prick your finger. That nothing makes a more desperate Rebell than a Prerogative infor­ced too far.

That liberty in man is as the skin to the body not to be put off, but together with life. That they which will command more than they ought, shall not at last command so much as is fit.

[Page 95] That Moderate Princes sit faster in their Regali­ties, than such as being but men, would yet have their power over their Subjects, as the Gods unlimited. That Oppression is an i­ron heat till it burns the hand. That to debar some States of antient Priviledges; is for a Falcon to undertake to beat a flock of wild­geese out of the fens. That to go about to compell a sullen reason to submit to a wilful peremptoriness is so long to beat a chain'd Ma­stife into his kennell, till at last he turns and flies at your throat. That unjust pollicy is to shoot as they [Page 96] did at Ostend into the mouth of a charged Canon to have two Bullets retur­ned for one. That he doth but indanger himself, that riding with too weak a Bit provokes a head strong horse with a spur. That tis safer to meet a valiant man weaponless, than almost a coward in Armor. That even a weak cause with a strong Castle, will boil salt blood to a Rebellious Itch. That tis better keeping a Crazy body in an equal temper, than to anger hu­mors by too sharp a phy­sick.

That Admonitions from a dying man are too serious [Page 97] to be neglected. That there is nothing certain that is not impossible. That a Cobler of Ulushing was one of the greatest enemies that the King of Spain e­ver had.

To con [...]lu [...]e, the Coun­try it self is a Moted Ca­stle keeping a Garnish of the Richest Jewels of the World in't; The Queen of Bohemia and her Prince­ly Children.

The People in it are Jews of the New Testa­ment, that have exchan­ged nothing but the Law for the Gospel: and this they rather profess than practise. Together a man [Page 98] of War riding at Anchor in the Downs of Germany.

For forrein Princes to help them is wise self-po­licy. When they have made them able to defend themselves against Spain, they are at the Pale, if they enable them to offend o­thers they go beyond it. For questionless were this Thorne out of the Spani­ards side he might be fear­ed too soon to grasp his long intended Monarchy. And were the spaniard but possessed Lord of the Low-Countries, or had the States but the wealth and power of Spain, The rest of Europe might he like [Page 99] people at Sea in a Ship on fire; that could only chuse whither they would drown or burn. Now, their war is the peace of their neighbours. So Rome when busied in her Civil Broiles, the Parthians li­ved at rest; but those con­cluded once, by Caesar next are they designed for con­quest.

If any man wonder at these contraries, let him look in his own body for as many severall humors. In his own brain for as ma­ny different Fancies. In his own heart for as various passions; and from all hese he may learn, That [Page 100] there is not in all the world such another Beast as Man.