A DIALOGUE Between an EXCHANGE, AND EXCHANGE-ALLEY; Or, A Court, and City APPRENTICE.

SIR, here is a Bill of Exchange on your Master, will you pay it?

Yes, I'le answer your Bill, though I have scarce Patience to an­swer you.

Why so pray? I don't know my self so unhappy as ever to have been in your company long enough to merit a diskindness.

Come Sir, it's reason enough for all Loyal Apprentices to turn Abhorrers of you and all your Gang, who run counter to them, by promoting that idle Paper now going up to my Lord Maior; as I conclude you do, by your living with such a notori­ous Fanatick; for though you were against it, he would make you sign it, or upon re­fusal, threaten no Employment beyond Sea, and I don't believe your Loyalty so much, but you would throw it all away rather than be starved.

But that I find some, though very much mistaken, Ingenuity, in what you say, I should return an answer in harsher Language, but at present take this; though my Master be a Dissenter from some imposed Ceremonies (if you call that a Fanatick, though your Cant has reached further now) of the Church of England, yet I questi­on not, he, I am sure, I, have otherguess Loyalty for the King, than empty words, or a little roaring Vive le Roy, over a Pipe of Wine; and for this Address, if I know any thing of his Mind, he is against my medling with it, which I should have agreed to, but that I think it a Duty I owe my self, upon all occasions to demonstrate that I am really a Protestant, and not behind any of your presumptuous Addressers for Loyal­ty; and if it be more than our place and business, thus in a Publick manner to de­clare it, we may be excused under that just provocation you have given us; and since many true Sons of the Church have gone so far in the management of it, I am resol­ved to be a Dissenter in nothing but where I see good reason: But this being no place to talk freely, I could wish you would, after I have told this small Summ, afford your self half an Hour's time at Garraway's, to be convinced how ridiculous such Abhorrers render themselves; which if I don't do to an unbiassed reason, though perhaps not to your prejudiced and inveigled understanding, I'le e'ne turn one too, for I am resolved, as an ingenuous Person said, to be of Nature's side.

Though I am not a little fond of gaining Proselites, yet Dam'e Coffee-houses, [Page 2]they are not for our turn, being all, if not most Whiggified hereabouts: if we be ta­ken notice of, we shall be bawled about in a Dialogue; there's Care, Baldwin, and Smith, have the best Noses (if they don't deal with th [...] Devil to smell things done in the open Street) that ever I knew; you se [...]one of ou [...] Party could not have his Poste­riors saluted in the Street t'other Day, but 'tis in a Dialogue presently; and the Rogues had like to have smelt that Hodg was with us to eat the fruits of his Address, but we Hectored that off, and retorted it with a brave slur upon Bethel; therefore I am for a Tavern, where I will command a Pint of good Wine.

Excuse me Sir, I never drink Wine in a Morning, and for privacy, I'le ensure you a Room under Lock and Key, where none but our Selves shall be Auditors, and if the Boy intrudes with a What do you lack, do you call, Gentlemen? I'le commend you in breaking a Dish upon his Head.

Well, along lets go, but there's another Objection I have; you have heard, I suppose the Truth of that Story of the Quakers Son, which our Emissary Thomson has so handsomly confounded with his unparallel'd impudence on Tuesday last; but there goes an odd passage, that he should tell of some Body at the Amst. Coffee-house, on Tuesday next, which methinks should make them all seem dangerous.

Never fear; my Money fall's right, only some to change; come let's away.

I'le follow you, Sir.

Boy, shew a Room, bring us a Bottle of Syder; Sir, will ye please to sit down, this Place will serve us to chat as well as the best Room in the Half-moon Tavern.

No Reflections, I pray.

There shan't, I'le promise you, nothing but matter of Fact, and convincing de­monstration shall be urged by me, and pray do you promise the like, for I hate railing and impertinencies wherever I find them.

Since our time is precious, let's each promise Secresie and Freedom, and so proceed to your ridiculing the Abhorrers of your proceedings, who are all the People of England, who join with us in Loyal Addresses to his Majestie.

Hold a little; I must beg pardon for interrupting you when you go so high at first, for if I consented to what you say, I should give up all I have to say afterwards; therefore, let's calmly consider what validity your words are of; I must confess, had I a Papistical, or, which I think can't be worse, a Heathenish absurd Faith, to believe contrary to all my Senses and thinking Faculties, what those lying Oracles, the Ob­servator, Heraclitus, and Thomson have said, and the Gazet it self, I doubt not will say, when they have got all the Addresses they can, and published them in English and Erench, under that Title; I should then be of your Judgment, or rather ill possessed Opinion; but let the French believe what they please, and further they won't go; espe­cially the great Men, they hate impositions, where they think them to be with a design; I say though their Faith is implicit, and they may by being used to believe as the Church believes, bring their Senses to that absurdity as to say Amen to all the foolish Legends and idle Stories every Week published here; yet I know no reason why we, who can read Letters, and see with our Eyes, and hear with our Ears from more credible Per­sons, things of a far different Nature; should not only be contented to have our Poc­kets picked now and then of a Penny for the novelty of the thing, but at last be per­swaded and argue for the Truth of it; but I have often thought that these dumb Dogs would never have prevailed by their Black and White, were it not for their impudent Abetters who swarm both in City and Countrey; and have so industriously abused the latter, that there is nothing to be had out of Town, but those we call Tory Pamphlets; you see 'tis almost Treason to have any other News-book there, or so much as the Ci­ty's Petition, though the Act of the Common-Council, approved of by Common-hall, and Printed by their Order and Authority, if they have any; O, the impudence as well as ingratitude of that Crape-making Town, to abuse one of its best Benefactors at that rate!

Pray remember your promise, Norwich is a Town, I have great Veneration for, as being a Pattern to us in Loyalty, in their good though perhaps too much Zealous Address to his Majesty; and truly I don't see they had much reason to respect the Ci­ties Petition, when one of our Ignoramus Grand-Juries presented their Address as a Libel; But—

Pray be franck, let's have no But's—you see I make none, because I am [Page 3]certain for me, our Discourse shall never go further, and if it does, I'le speak nothing I am not afraid to stand to before any honest Jury any where, let me have but fair play, and onely those that hear me my Accusers, as Evidence, for I am joined in my Letany with Hickeringel against the Man-catchers.

Why, that I was saying is this; you run away with the Petition, as if the Act of the City, when you know how 'tis Maior ridden, and as it were, the Sheriffs and some of the Factious Aldermens great Horse, which turns which way they would, because they have the bit in its mouth, and I'am afraid, under the rose our House of Commons is so too, for in such Assemblies there may be Leaders, who also drive the rest, and these Drivers may be Enemies to the King, and the established Government in Church and State, and then where are we? and you know who were the men in the H. of C. these late Parliaments; look into the proceedings of that at Westminster and Oxford, and you shall find that of the 513. not above 15. are the great spokesmen, there is, Sir W. J. Sir F. W. Coll. B. —

You need not name'em, I find whereabouts you are; and in answer, for the City shall onely say, that you begin with the wrong end of the Horse, and make it such an Ass as to stand ready Sadled and Bridled, while its Rider Mounts, or is Mount­ed by another hand: But such has been the kindness of our Monarchs to this City whether they have deserved it or no, I'le onely think, that they have given them the preheminence before most places of chusing their own Annual Governours; and cer­tainly a better order among so great a concourse of People cannot be than by our Com­mon Hall, for every Freeholder to have his Vote, unless where the Ballot is used, in­conveniencies in which there are too: Now I fancie you nor none of your party, would, but are far from it, have the Government of this City in more hands than it is; nor would you have the K. leave his more weighty or pleasant affairs to turn Lord Maior: no, you are more civil; and then I think you must come to what it is, a plain Lord Mayor and Sheriffs chosen by the People, the Body, the Majority of them, and confirmed by the K. Now when these are with so much deliberation mounted, they must ride till the Year's out, unless some more than ordinary cause; Now if the Citi­zens of London are so foolish, and the People of England so mad, as to chuse for their Governors and Representatives (with whom they trust their Lives and all, and by whom, as has been often said by our betters, they can only be undone,) those that they know not, or onely upon recommendation of a Faction, such as are Enemies to the King, who if really so, will be Enemies to themselves: The worst you can say of them, is, that they are factiously mad and fanatical, but that they are the minor part, you will not now sure have the impudence to say it to me, or to any but some at Sala­manca, or far enough from understanding or hearing the truth; but that is only in an­swer to your wrong laid position: And for Vindication of the City's Government of late, I think it would be an intrusion for me on those ingenious Gentlemen who sit at Helm, and are better able to do it, my place as yet, is, as also yours ought to be, rather to submit and acquiesce in their prudent management of Affairs, and not saw­cily to contradict 'em (as you have, as far as you can) being that to which under the Auspicious influence of our Great Governour, if my shallow judgment fail me not, be­ing confirmed by the opinion of a great Courtier, who frankly told me t'other day, not only this City but the whole Kingdom owes its present peace and quiet.

We will grant ye, that we ought to submit to our Governours, but no fur­ther than may consist with Loyalty to our Prince, in which case we may oppose with good Warrant all the factious Fanaticks any where; and when we were told it would be grateful to our Soveraign, would you have us refuse setting our hands to such a harmless Paper, which is void of all manner of Reflection.

Very fine! Because you would have Fools, for only such will believe no Re­flections in that Paper, you are resolved to do it now with a Warrant against the greatest and the best part of the City; but to leave that to be taken notice of by others, tell me, do you think it no reflection upon the H. of C. what the King has said of 'em in his Declaration, and he may sure say that that 'tis not fit for every one to say: now in thanking the King for his Declaration, the meaning on't, surely is, thanks for Dis­solving and publishing the faults of the two last Parliaments; and sure, it will signifie nothing without they that chose them, the People of England say so, which that ever they will, believe it who can for me. No certainly, they that urge this most, have [Page 4]more understanding than to think to have it believed, but are only so taken with the notion, that they resolve impudently to assert it, till a Parliament comes to stop their bawling. But of all the Militia-men and Grand-juries and other Addressers, I find none less concerned in chusing Parliaments, and therefore ought to be as backward in crimi­nating as any, than those in our Station; but when we see you had been put upon it, we thought the K. had a mind to know how many Lives and Fortunes among the Youths in London he had at his Service; and hoping none but the Observator would blame us for observing that method which the nature of Government calls for, application to a next Superiour; we resolved upon an Address to his Majesties Vicegerent in this City, and we doubt not his Majesty will see Loyalty through our Modesty as well as your presumption, and unless you take in those of our size who have Loyalty for the King, and veneration for Parliaments, all that your Party do in Addressing, Abhorring, &c. will signifie nothing to any that understand the constitution of our Government, unless you can convince them with plain English demonstration that the House of Commons is not the Real true Representative of all the People, or the Majority of 'em, and the same of the Common-Hall; till then I say the Authors of Heraclitus and his gang may keep their Breath for a better purpose; for all they now do is to fill the Tory's mouths with some plausible chat, which may sway some, but very few, so simple men. It being almost Change time, in short, pray let me know your Conviction and your Resolution.

Sir, With a great deal of Patience and Attention I have heard you, and though I must be one of Mris. Celliers followers in her Motto, I never change, yet I must do you that Justice, as to joyn issue with what you say between man and man to be true, but I am so far engaged and encouraged with and by our noble Patriots who set us on work, that as long as they hold up, I think I shall get no better Friends, and I'le e'ne hold to them: And for a Parliament, if it does come, 'tis but going to Holland a while, and drawing in our Observator Horns while that dread is over: in the mean time in Jolli­ty we Drink with a Huzza the D's Health, and in private, all the Salvation we look after, is, from a Parliament, Good Lord deliver us.