Advice to a Painter, by A. M. Esq
SPread a large Canvass, Painter, to contain
The great Assembly, and the num'rous Train,
Where all about him shall in Triumph sit
Abhorring Wisdom and despising Wit,
Hating all Iustice and resolv'd to Fight.
First draw His Highness prostrate to the South,
Adoring Rome, with this Speech in his Mouth,
Most Holy Father, being joyn'd in League
With Father P—s, D—y, and with Teague,
Thrown at your Sacred Feet, I humbly bow,
I and the wise Associates of my Vow;
A Vow, nor Fire nor Sword shall ever end,
Till all this Nation to your Footstool bend:
Thus arm'd with Zeal and Blessings from your Hands,
I'le raise my Papists, and my Irish Bands;
And by a Noble well-contrived Plot,
Manag'd by wise Fitz— and by Scot,
Prove to the World, I'le have Old England know,
That common Sense is my Eternal Foe.
I ne'r can fight in a more glorious Cause,
Than to destroy their Liberty and Laws,
Their House of Commons, and their House of Lords,
Parliaments, Precedents and dull Records;
Shall these e'r dare to contradict my Will,
And think a Prince oth' Blood can e'r do ill?
It is our Birth-right to have Power to kill.
Shall they e're dare to think they shall decide
The Way to Heaven, and who shall be my Guide?
Shall they pretend to say, That Bread is Bread,
Or there's no Purgatory for the Dead?
That Extream Vnction is but common Oyl,
And not Infallibly the Roman Spoil?
I will have Villains in Our Notions rest,
And I do say it, therefore it's the best.
[Page 4]Next
Painter draw his
M— by his side,
Conveying his Religion and his Bride;
He who long since abjur'd the Royal Line,
Does now in Popery with his Master joyn.
Then draw the Princess with her golden Locks,
Hastning to be envenom'd with the P—
And in her youthful Veins receive a Wound,
Which sent N. H. before her, under Ground;
The Wound of which the tainted Ch— fades,
Laid up in Store for a new Set of Maids.
Poor Princess, born under a sullen Star,
To find such Welcome when you came so far!
Better some jealous Neighbour of your own
Had call'd you to a Sound, tho' petty Throne,
Where 'twixt a wholesom Husband and a Page,
You might have linger'd out a lazy Age,
Than on dull Hopes of being here a Q—
Ere twenty dye, and rot before fifteen.
Now Painter shew us in the Blackest Dye,
The Counsellors of all this Villany:
Cl—d, who first appear'd in humble guise,
Was always thought too Gentle, Meek and Wise;
But when he came to act upon the Stage,
He prov'd the mad Cethegus of our Age;
He and his D—ke had both too great a Mind,
To be by Iustice or by Law confin'd;
Their boyling Heads can hear no other Sounds
Than Fleets and Armies, Battails, Blood and Wounds;
And to destroy our Liberty they hope,
By Irish Talbot, and old doting Pope.
Next Talbot must by his great Master stand,
Laden with Folly, Flesh, and Ill-got Land;
He's of a size indeed to fill a Porch,
But ne'r can make a Pillar of the Church;
His Sword is all his Argument, not his Book,
Altho' no Scholar, he can act the Cook;
And will cut Throats again, if he be paid;
In th' Irish Shambles he first learn'd the Trade.
Then Painter shew thy Skill, and in fit place,
Let's see the Nuncio A—ll's sweet Face.
[Page 5]Let the Beholders by thy Art espy
His Sense and Soul, as squinting as his Eye.
Let B—s autumnal Face be seen,
Rich with the Spoils of a poor Algerine,
Who trusting in him, was by him betray'd;
And so shall we when his Advice's obey'd:
Great Heroes to get Honour by the Sword,
He got his Wealth by breaking of his Word;
And now his Daughter he hath got with Child,
And Pimps to have his Family defil'd.
Next Painter draw the Rabble of the Plot,
G—n, Fitz G—d, Loftus, Porter, Scot:
These are fit Heads indeed, to turn a State,
And change the Order of a Nations Fate;
Ten thousand such as these shall ne'r controul
The smallest Atom of an English Soul.
Old England on a strong Foundation stands,
Defying all their Heads and all their Hands,
Its steady Basis never could be shook,
When wiser Men her Ruin undertook;
And can her Guardian Angels let her stoop
At last, to Madmen, Fools, and to the Pope?
No Painter, no close up this Piece and See,
This crowd of Traitors hang'd in EFFIGIE.
By A. M.
Brit.
AH Raleigh, when thou didst thy Breath resign
To trembling Iames, would I had quitted mine.
Cubs dist thou call them? Hadst thou seen this Brood
Of Earls, Dukes, and Princes of the Blood;
No more of Scottish Race thou wouldst complain:
These would be Blessings in this spurious Reign.
Awake, arise from thy long blest Repose;
Once more with me partake of Morlace Woes.
Ra.
What mighty Pow'r hath forc'd me from my rest?
Oh mighty Queen, why so untimely drest?
Brit.
Favour'd by Night, conceal'd in this Disguise,
Whilst the lewd Court in drunken Slumber lies,
I stole away, and never will return,
Till England knows who did her City burn;
Till Cavaliers shall Favourites be deem'd,
And Loyal Sufferers by the Court esteem'd;
Till Liegh and Galloway shall Bribes reject;
Thus Osburn's Golden Cheat I shall detect:
[Page 8]Till Atheist
Lauderdale shall leave this Land,
And Commons Votes shall Cut-Nose Guards disband;
Till Kate a happy Mother shall become,
Till Charles loves Parliaments, and Iames hates Rome.
Ral.
What fatal Crimes make you for ever sly
Your once lov'd Court and Martyrs Progeny?
Brit.
A Colony of French possess the Court;
Pimps, Priests, Buffoons in th' Privy Chamber sport;
Such slimy Monsters ne'r approacht a Throne
Since Pharaoh's Days, nor so defil'd a Crown.
In sacred Ear Tyrannick Arts they croak,
Pervert his Mind, and good Intentions choak;
Tell him of Golden Indies, Fairy Lands,
Leviathan, and absolute Commands.
Thus Fairy-like the King they steal away,
And in his room a Changling Lewis lay.
How oft have I him to himself restor'd,
In's left the Scale, in's right hand plac'd the Sword?
Taught him their use, what dangers would ensue,
To them who strive to separate these two?
The bloody Scotish Chronicle read ore
Shew'd him how many Kings in purple gore
Were hurl'd to Hell by cruel Tyrant Lore.
The other day fam'd Spencer I did bring,
In lofty Notes Tudor's blest Race to sing;
How Spain's proud Powers her Virgin-Arms controul'd,
And Gold'n Days in peaceful Order roul'd;
How like ripe Fruit she dropt from off her Throne,
Full of grey Hairs, good Deeds, and great Renown.
As the Iessean Hero did appease
Saul's stormy Rage, and stopt his black Disease;
So the learn'd Bard, with Artful Song supprest
The swelling Passion of his canker'd Breast,
And in his Heart kind Influences shed
Of Country Lore by Truth and Iustice bred:
Then, to perform the Cure so full begun,
To him I shew'd this glorious setting Sun.
[Page 9]How by her Peoples Looks pursued from far,
So mounted on a bright Celestial Car,
Out-shining Virgo, or the Iulian Star.
Whilst in Truths Mirrour this good Scene he spy'd,
Enter'd a Dame, bedeckt with spotted Pride,
Fair Flower de Luce within an Azure Field,
Her left Hand bears the Antient Gallick Shield,
By her usurpt; her Right a bloody Sword,
Inscrib'd Leviathan, our Sovereign Lord;
Her towry Front a fiery Meteor bears,
An Exhalation bred of Blood and Tears;
Around her Iove's lewd rav'nous Curs complain,
Pale Death, Lust, Tortures, fill her pompous Train.
She from the easie King Truth's Mirrour took,
And on the Ground in spiteful Fall it broke;
Then frowning thus, with proud Disdain she spoke.
Are thred-bare Virtues Ornaments for Kings?
Such poor pedantick Toys teach Underlings.
Do Monarchs rise by Virtue or by Sword?
Who e'r grew great by keeping of his Word?
Virtue's a faint Green-Sickness to brave Souls,
Dastards their Hearts, their active Heat controuls:
The Rival God, Monarchs of th' other World,
This mortal Poyson amongst Princes hold;
Fearing the mighty Projects of the great
Shall drive them from their proud celestial Seat,
If not o'r aw'd: This new found holy Cheat,
Those pious Frauds too slight, t' insnare the brave,
Are proper Acts of long-ear'd Rout t' inslave.
Bribe hungry Priests to deifie your Might,
To teach your Will's, your only Rule to Right;
And sound Damnation to all that dare deny't.
Thus Heaven designs 'gainst Heaven you should turn,
And make them fear those Powers you once did scorn.
When all the Gobling Interest of Mankind,
By Hirelings sold to you, shall be resign'd;
And by Impostures God and Man betray'd,
The Church and State you safely may invade;
So boundless Law in its full Power shines,
Whilst your starv'd Power in Legal Fetters Pines.
[Page 10]Shake off those Baby Bands from your strong Arms,
Henceforth be deaf to your old Witches Charms;
Tast the delicious Sweets of Sovereign Power,
'Tis Royal Game whole Kingdoms to deflow'r.
Three spotless Virgins to your Bed I'le bring,
A Sacrifice to you their God and King:
As these grow stale we'l harras human kind,
Rack Nature till new Pleasures you shall find,
Strong as your Reign, and beauteous as your Mind.
When she had spoke, a confus'd Murmour rose
Of French, Scotch, Irish, all my mortal Foes,
Some English too, O shame! disguis'd I spy'd,
Led all by the wise Son-in-Law of Hyde;
With Fury drunk, like Baccanels they Roar,
Down with that common Magna Charta Whore:
With joynt Consent on helpless Me they flew,
And from my Charles to a base Goal me drew;
My Reverend Age expos'd to Scorn and Shame,
To Prigs, Bawds, Whores, was made the publick Game.
Frequent Addresses to my Charles I send,
And my sad State did to his Care commend:
But his fair Soul transform'd by that French Dame,
Had lost a sense of Honour, Justice, Fame.
Like a tame Spinster in's Seraigl he sits,
Besieg'd by Whores, Buffoons and Bastard Chits;
Lull'd in Security, rowling in Lust,
Resigns his Crown to Angel Cromwel's Trust.
Her Creature Osborne, the Revenue steals,
False F—ch, Knave Ang—ey, misguide the Seals;
Mack-Iames the Irish Biggots does adore:
His French and Teague commands on Sea and Shore:
The Scotch Scalado of our Court two Isles,
False Lauderdale with Adure all defiles.
Thus the States Right marr'd by this hellish Court,
And no one left these Furies to cast out:
Ah Vindex come, and purge the poison'd State;
Descend, Descend, e're the Cure's desperate.
Ral.
Once more great Queen thy Darling strive to save,
Rescue him again from Scandal and the Crave;
Present to's Thoughts his long scorn'd Parliament,
The Basis of his Throne and Government:
[Page 11]In his deaf Ears sound his dead Fathers name,
Perhaps that Spell may his ill Soul reclaim;
Who knows what good Effects from thence may spring?
'Tis God-like Good to save a falling King.
Brit.
As easily learn'd Vertuoso's may
With the Dogs Blood his gentle Kind Convey
Into the Wolf, and make him Guardian turn,
To the bleating Flock, by him so lately torn;
If this Imperial Juice once taint his Blood,
'Tis by no potent Antidote withstood.
Tyrants, like Leprous Kings, for publick weal,
Should be immur'd, lest the Contagion steal
Over the whole. Th' Elect of the Iessean Line,
To this firm Law their Scepter did resign.
To the serene Venetian State I'le go,
From her sage Mouth fam'd Principles to know;
With her, the Prudence of the Ancients read,
To teach my People in their Steps to tread;
By their great Pattern such a State I'le frame,
Shall eternize a glorious lasting Name.
Till then, my Raleigh teach our noble Youth,
To love Sobriety and holy Truth:
Watch and preside over their tender Age,
Lest Court Corruption should their Soul engage:
Tell them how Arts and Arms in thy young Days
Employ'd our Youth, not Taverns, Stews and Plays:
Tell them the generous Scorn their rise does ow
To Flattery, Pimping and a Gawdy Shew:
Teach them to scorn the Corwells, Pembrooks, Nells,
The Clevelands, Osborns, Berties, Laudtherdails,
Poppea, Tegoline and Arteria's Name,
Who yield to these in Lewdness, Lust and Fame.
Make 'em admire the Talbots, Sidneys, Veres,
Drake, Cav'ndish, Blake, Men void of slavish Fears,
True Sons of Glory, Pillars of the State,
On whose fam'd Deeds all Tongues and Writers wait;
When with bright Ardour their bright Souls do burn,
Back to my dearest Country I'le return.
Tarquin's just Judge and Caesar's equal Peers,
With them I'le bring, to dry my People's Tears.
[Page 12] Publicola with healing Hands shall pour
Balm in their Wounds, and shall their Life restore:
Greek Arts and Roman Arms in her conjoyn'd,
Shall England raise, relieve opprest Mankind.
As Iove's great Son th' infested Globe did free
From noxious Monsters, hell-bred Tyrannie;
So shall my England in a Holy War,
In Triumph bear slain Tyrants from afar;
Her true Crusado shall at last pull down
The Turkish Crescent and the Persian Sun.
Freed by my Labours, Fortunate Blest Isle,
The Earth shall rest, the Heaven shall on thee smile;
And this kind Secret for Reward shall give,
No Poysonous Serpent on the Earth shall live.
Sir Edmondbury Godfrey's Ghost.
IT happen'd in the Twi-light of the Day,
As England's Monarch in his Closet lay,
And Chiffinch step'd to fetch the Female Prey,
The bloody shape of Godfrey did appear,
And in sad Vocal Sounds these things declare:
Behold, Great Sir, I from the Shades am sent,
To shew these Wounds that did your Fall prevent.
My panting Ghost, as Envoy, comes to call,
And warn you, lest, like me, y' untimely fall;
Who against Law your Subjects Lives pursue,
By the same rate may dare to murther you.
I, for Religion, Laws, and Liberties,
Am mangled thus, and made a Sacrifice.
Think what befel Great Egypt's hardned King,
Who scorn'd the Profit of admonishing.
Shake off your brandy Slumbers; for my Words
More Truth than all your close Cabal affords:
A Court you have with Luxury oregrown,
And all the Vices ere in Nature known;
Where Pimps and Panders in their Coaches ride,
And in Lampoons and Songs your Lust deride.
Old Bawds and slighted Whores, there tell, with shame,
The dull Romance of your lascivious Flame.
Players and Scaramouches are your Joy;
Priests and French Apes do all your Land annoy;
Still so profuse, you are insolvent grown,
A Mighty Bankrupt on a Golden Throne.
Your nauseous Palate the worst Food doth crave;
No wholesom Viands can an entrance have:
Each Night you lodge in that French Syren's Arms
She straight betrays you with her wanton Charms;
Works on your Heart, softned with Love and Wine,
And then betrays you to some Philistine.
Imperial Lust does o'er your Scepter sway;
And though a Sovereign, makes you to obey.
Yet thoughts so stupid have your Soul possess'd,
As if inchanted by some Magick Priest.
[Page 18]Next he who 'gainst the Senate's Vote did wed, Took defil'd H. and Hesti to his Bed:
Fiend in his Face, Apostle in his Name,
Contriv'd two Wars to your eternal shame.
He ancient Laws and Liberties defies;
On standing Guards and new raised Force relies:
The Teagues he courts, and doth the French admire,
And fain he would be mounted one step higher.
All this by you must needs be plainly seen,
And yet he awes you with his daring Spleen.
Th' unhappy Kingdom suffered much of Old,
When Spencer and loose Gaveston controull'd;
Yet they by just Decrees were timely sent,
To suffer a perpetual Banishment.
But your bold States-men nothing can restrain,
Their most enormous Courses you maintain;
Witness that Man, who had for divers years
Pay'd the Cubb-Commons, Pensions and Arrears;
Though your Exchequer was at his Command,
Durst not before his just Accuser stand,
For Crimes and Treasons of so black a hue,
None dare to prove his Advocate but you.
Trust not in Prelates false Divinity,
Who wrong their Prince, and shame their Deity,
Making a God so partial in their Cause,
Exempting Kings alone from humane Laws.
These lying Oracles they did infuse
Of old, and did your Martyr'd Sire abuse.
Their strong delusions did him so inthral,
No Cautions would anticipate his Fall.
Repent in time, and banish from your sight
The Pimp, the Whore, Buffoon, Church-parasite;
Let Innocence deck your remaining days,
That After-ages may unfold your Praise.
So may Historians in new Methods write,
And draw a Curtain 'twixt your black and white.
The Ghost spake thus, groan'd thrice, and said no more:
Straight in came Chiffinch hand in hand with Whore:
The King tho' much concern'd with Joy and Fear
Starts from the Couch, and bid the Dame draw near.