AN EXPOSITION OF THE FIFTH COMMANDEMENT SHEWING The principall duties of Children to Parents, firstly therein intended: and what God also requireth, in regard thereof, from Parents towards their children.
CHAP. I.
OF the weight of the duty of Childrens Honouring of their Parents. Exod. 20. 12. Honour thy Father, and thy Mother, that thy dayes may be long in the Land which the Lord thy God giveth thee. The words which I have Read, are obvious to every common eye, and intelligible by every ordinary understanding, and therefore time need not be spent in any large opening of any obscurity of phrase in them. The parts of the Text also are as plainly manifest to be [Page 2] two: First, a Precept, Honour thy Father, and thy Mother] Secondly, a promise incouraging to obey that precept: that thy daies may be long in the Land which the Lord thy God giveth thee.] In the precept you have, First, the duty it self injoyned, Honour,] Secondly, the persons to whom the duty is injoyned, even the children to these Fathers and Mothers; yea each Child, of what ranck or condition soever, who is yet in the Land of the living, is required to perform this duty to living Father and Mother: and therefore it is put in the second person singular; Honour thy Father, and thy Mother, that thy dayes may be long, &c.] Thirdly, the persons, who by divine command are to be honoured by each Child, namely, each Childs Father, yea, and as well, each Childs Mother: Honour thy Father, and thy Mother.] The main terms then to be further considered of are, First, that of Father and Mother. Secondly, that of Honour; and then we shall briefly explain the promise. By Father and Mother, most interpreters understand all superiours. First, such as are above others, yet without Authory, properly, over them; as such as are others superiours, by much, in years; as are Antient men and women, to those that are young, 1 Tim. 5. 1. or such as are others betters, by much, in eminency of parts, powesse, experience, bounty, grace, &c. Gen. 45. 8. Job. 31. 18. 1 Chron. 4. 14, 21. 2 Rings 13. 14, 15. Secondly, such as are others superiours, having Authority over them, whether private: And that either by the Law of nature, as naturall Fathers Who are firstly here intended by Father and Mother: even naturall Parents. and Mothers, who are principally here intended: Or by way of private contract, as Husbands who are wives superiours: specially Masters, whether in the Family, 2 Kings 5. 13. or in the School, [Page 3] and College, 2 Kings 2. 12. who are as Fathers to to their Servants, Scholars, and Pupils. Or Secondly publick: even such as have more publick Authority over others; either in the Commonwealth, as civill Rulers, Esay 22. 21. 1 Sam. 24. 12. or in the Church, as Church officers teaching and ruling, Acts 22. 1. Judg. 18. 19. 2 Kings 6. 21. Now though with Musculus, I will not restrain the meaning of the 5th Commandement, as only intending naturall Fathers & Mothers, and the honour due to them from their Children; yet because it is undeniable to all, that these are principally intended here, & the other onely in a second place and respect, I shall therefore, (God willing) in the insuing discourse, attend to that, as firstly and mainly aimed at here, and plainly, and simply expressed in the very letter of the Text.
Touching the other word, Honour: It is to be What is meant by Honour Even, considered both in generall, and in a restrained sense. All meet honour, and every kind of regular honour, being due from Children to Parents, The Lord doth not say, love thy Father, and thy Mother, or fear them, or obey them, or recompence them, or be an honour to them: any one of these being too narrow, to reach so large a duty, as parentall relations call for from their children, and each of these being separable from the other, and may be in other relations, where all the other are not so properly requisite; yet no one of these are excluded, but all, and every of them included in the notion of Honour. Filiall Honour is the center wherein they all meet, and whence again they are all drawn out to their respective objects, Father and Mother. Filiall honour must season them, each must savour of Honour. Filial Honour must regulate them all; they must go so [Page 4] far as that goeth, and no further. Filial honour Honour in the Generall, and Honour in speciall, both must be their common stamp, the impression whereof, each must bear. Due Filial honour must be their touchstone, by which they must receive their triall.
Honour then in the Generall is Parents due from their children. So is Honour in speciall; whether that which is more direct, or that which is in a more reflect way.
Honour in a direct way is, in Scripture language, 1. Direct, fourfold; even Honour, First, of Respect, Secondly, of Reverence, Thirdly, of Obedience, Fourthly, of Recompence; and are all and each of them included in this generall term, Honour.
1. Honour of high Respect and love is understood as 1. Honour of Respect. in that, Psal. 15. 4. He honoureth them that fear the Lord: that is, he highly esteemeth, and respecteth, he most dearly loveth and affecteth them. 1 Tim. 5. 17. The Elders that Rule well, count them worthy of double Honour, i. e. of respect, as well as that of Recompence. 1 Pet. 3. 7. Giving Honour to them, as to the weaker vessels, i. e. having a tender respect to them. 2 Sam. 6. 22. Of them shall I be had in Honour, i. e. highly esteemed, respected, and intirely beloved. So here, Honour thy Father and thy Mother, i. e. highly prise and respect, and most dearly love thy Father & thy mother, yea so as it be in a way of Honour to them as Parents, and not barely as others, not so nearly related.
2. Honour is taken in Scripture for Honour of Reverence and fear. So when God speaketh of 2. Honour of Reverence. his Honour, as to a Master, he calleth it fear, Mal. 1. 6. if I am a Master, where is my fear? or Honour as a Master; hence that of Saul to Samuel, 1 Sam. 15. 30. Yet Honour me before the people; or let [Page 5] the people see that thou doest reverence me. Hence that Levit. 19. 32. honour the face of the old man, i. e. reverence it. So here, Honour thy Father and thy Mother i. e. reverence and awe them, in an honourable way to them as Parents, and not as others meerly, not so nearly related.
3. Honour is taken in Scripture, for Honour of 3. Honour of Obedience. Obedience. So Mat. 1. 6 if I am a Father, where is my Honour? i. e. of obedience. It being spoken to those, Respectless, Awless, and also disobedient Priests and People there mentioned. So Eph. 6. 1. to prove that Children should obey their Parents in the Lord, the Apostle brings in the fifth Commandement, v. 2. Honour thy Father and thy Mother: because if to Honour Father and Mother then to obey them, for obedience is, in part, the honor due to them; only they are to obey them, so as Honour of Parents may be seen, and read, as in large Characters, in all the Acts and passages of that obedience.
4. Honour is taken in Scripture, for Honour of 4. Honour of Recompence. Recompence, and thankfulness. Numb. 22. 37. cannot I Honour, or recompence thee Honourably (saith Balack to Balaam) It is the same Hebrew word with this in Exod. 20. 12. Judg. 13. 17. That when this is come to pass, I may Honour thee, (i. e.) make thee some gratefull recompence. 1 Tim. 5. 17. Count them worthy of double Honour, i. e. that of Recompence, as well as that of respect. So here, Honour thy Father and thy Mother, 2. Reflect Honour, or being an Honour to them, and carrying of it so, as maketh for Parents Honour. i. e. as they need, and as thou art able, & hast opportunity, make them thankfull recompence, onely so as all may be as Honour to them, as Parents, and not in the least savouring, or holding forth any dishonour to them.
Honour in a Reflect way, is to be such, [Page 6] or to carry it so, as may redound to anothers Honour, whom we are bound to Honour. 1 Sam. 15. 30. Honour me before the people, i. e. carry it so before them, as may not redound to my disgrace, but honour. So in that also: if I am a Father, where is my Honour? Mal. 1. 6. i. e. why are not you, as my Children, an Honour to me, & not such a dishonour to my name, that my holy name and ordinances suffer reproach, and contempt by you; or why do not you carry it more honourably, so as may make for my honour, and not so basely, as maketh for my great dishonour. Ester. 6 6. The man whom the King will honour, (i. e.) enact and do something, making for his Honour. Judg. 13. 17. that I may do thee Honour, i. e. do something, making for thine Honour. It is the same Hebrew word, and in the same conjugation with this verb in Exod. 20. 12. So here, Honour thy Father and thy Mother, i. e. be an honour to them, carry it so, as may redound to their honour, and no way to their disgrace.
The promise followeth, [That thy daies The promise explained. may belong in the Land which the Lord thy God giveth thee] this further declareth who are firstly concerned in the precept; namely, such whose God the Lord is in speciall sort, such like as the Jewes, to whom this land was first solemnly promulged, as in Exod. 20. is expressed: who were a people in especiall Covenant with God, children of God, and of the Church, and of the Covenant: who professed to look, not for a Portion in this world, so much as by that Land of promise to be led to a more spirituall and heavenly Canaan and rest, of which that earthly Canaan was but a shadow, Heb. 4. though this Law being given to Adam in innocency, and ingraven [Page 7] in his heart, and the rootstep, and impression of it being yet left in the hearts of all men, by nature, and being one of Gods Morall Laws, it bindeth all and every Child of man, one or other, in general and in particular. In this promise, he doth not say, that thy life may be long in the world, but that thy dayes may be long in the Land which the Lord thy God giveth thee; which to the Jews was the Land of Canaan, to others, the Land of their possession, wherein, if honourers of Parents, children shall live long, if good for them; or if ordered by God to live less while, they shall have the blessing of long life. And so much for explication of the words; the doctrine which we shall (through divine Assistance) prosecute is this.
That children Honour their Parents; It is a duty The main doctrine. The weight of the duty of Honour of Parents proved. of greatest moment and concernment.
Let us first evince the weightiness of this duty, and then more fully handle the duty it self.
Four reasons, amongst many, may be given to prove the weight of this duty, Honour thy Father and thy Mother.
1. Because it is placed by the Law-giver himself 1. Because next in order to the Commandements of the first Table, and before the Commandements of the second Table. immediately next to the commandements of the 1. Table, as next in order to them, and before all the other Commandements of the 2. Table, as in order of duty, and dignity, preceding the same. It is made a sweet closure, bond, and sementing to both Tables, binding and fastning each to other inviolably, and inseparably. As this is more fast or loose; so are mens spirits more girt to the duties of both Tables, or more loose from them. He that conscientiously honoureth his Parents, he is assuredly conscientious of honouring of God, in the first place, and his Parents for conscience sake unto the Lord▪ Piety to God-ward, as a cause, precedeth, [Page 8] in him, to this blessed duty, piety towards Parents, as to its effect. And therefore the Lord doth not without cause stile the duty of Children to Parents, by the name of piety, 1 Tim. 5. 4. let them learn of shew piety to them at home, and to requite their Parents; Piety being in the root, it is piety in the fruit, yea this blessed fruit, is a furthering means also, to promove all the acts of piety, which spring out of that root; if Children honour their Parents fully, and as they ought, they will, in observance of their Parents counsels and commands, be more carefull of whatsoever God commandeth, respecting the first or second Table: hence that for the first Table, Levit. 19. 3. Ye shall fear every man his Mother, and every man his Father, and keep my Sabbaths, where under the notion of Gods Sabbaths kept, not alone the observation of the Sabbath it self is understood, but, as in Scripture language, the whole worship of God is meant; So Esay 56. 4. the Eunuches that keep my Sabbaths, i. e. observe my whole worship; so Ezek. 44. 24. so Ezek. 20. 24. despising and polluting his Sabboths, is despising and polluting his worship: hence that is there added—and their eyes are towards their Idols. Observable it is also, that in Levit. 19. 2. God saith, be ye holy, as I am holy, and then addeth verse 3. ye shall fear every man his Mother, and his Father; From that piety, originally springeth this: yet again annexeth to this, ye shall keep my Sabbaths. In the Decalogue, that is first, Remember that thou keep holy the Sabbath: and then, Honour thy Father, and thy Mother. Here it is, Fear every man his Mother, and his Father, and keep my Sabbaths; that Radicall piety being laid in the heart, now this other piety, exceedingly furthereth the exercise [Page 9] of particular acts of piety towards God; one pious towards Parents, will be carefull of all naturall worship, to call upon God, to love him, to fear him, & to put his trust in him, required in the 1. Commandement; he wil conscientiously observe all Gods instituted worship, avoiding all worship of mens inventing, according to the tenour of the 2. Commandement; he will reverently, and faithfully improve Gods attributes, titles, words, and works, avoiding the contrary abuse thereof, as it is injoyned in the 3. Commandement; he will also as faithfully, and fruitfully sanctifie the Lords dayes, resting from the works of his calling, and especially from vain sports, which is that which the 4. Commandement requireth: the like may be said of the Commandements of the 2. table, which will all be duly attended, if this duty of the fifth Commandem. be faithfully observed; both are implyed in that place (of which we shall make much use in this discourse) Gen. 18. 19. I know Abraham, that he will command his children,—and they shall keep the way of the Lord, to do judgement and justice; if Abrahams children honour his parentall Authority, so that they are at his command, then they keep the way of the Lord, then they do judgement and justice; whatsoever path, God chalketh out for them to walk in towards God, or towards men, they will be keeping in it. And indeed, who better servants, in that relation, to Masters, then those that were good children to Parents? who more obedient subjects to lawfull Authority, and Fathers of the Common-wealth, then such as learned and practised filiall obedience to Parents, at home? who more respective to Ministers, then those that were, and are conscientiously respective to good Parents? [Page 10] who more tender of their own, and others lives and healths, of their own and others chastity, of their own and others estates and names, avoyding the contrary evills, to a very sinfull motion looking that way, then such as have been Conscientious honourers of their Parents? hence, on the contrary, dishonour of Parents is made a Ring-leading sin, a very spring and root of manifold wickedness. Ezek. 22. 7. when the Prophet would charge upon all sorts in Jerusalem, their most notorious crimes, he beginneth thus, In thee have they set light by Father and Mother: and then goeth on, in the midst of thee have they dealt by oppression with the stranger, in thee have they vexed the fatherless and widow. Ibid. thou hast despised mine holy things, and hast profaned my Sabbaths, verse 8. In thee are men that carry tales to shed blood, vers. 9. In vers. 10. 11. he chargeth them with horrid fleshly filthiness, in vers. 12. with Bribery, Usury, Extortion, &c. if therefore the bond of the fifth Commandement be broken, men rush upon breach of the sixth Commandement, witnesse their bloodiness mentioned, v. 9. upon breach of the seventh Commandement, witness their filthiness instanced in vers. 10. 11. upon breach of the eighth Commandement, witness their oppression, usury, bribery, extortion, v. 12. upon breach of the nineth Commandement, witness their carrying of tales to shed blood, v. 9. yea upon breaches of all the Commandements of the first Table, witness their despising the holy things of God, and profaning his Sabbaths, v. 8. Deut. 21. 20. the Parents are brought in complaining, This our Son is stubborn, he will not obey our voice, he is a glutton and a drunkard. It is no wonder that children who honour not Parents, are [Page 11] given to those, or to any other vices, to which loose and lewd companions will readily draw them. Surely it is justly to be feared, to be too much our case in New England, where many of the youth grow so rude and profane, so regardless of Superiours, in the family, as masters, in the State, as Magistrates, in the Church, as Elders: where many of them are so vainly given, so loose in their company, so proud, and supercilious in their carriages, so new-fangled in their fashions, and ruffianly in their hair, nay jearers, many of them, at the best persons and things, in a word, where is so little yet appearing of God, or good, in too many of them; I say it is justly to be feared, that children here are not honourers of Parents. Here Parents are commonly put more to it, to make use of their childrens hands and help, and so children here being naturally apt to count too much upon what they do for Parents, they are as apt to set the more light by them, and by their instructions, and admonitions, and so an open way is made thereby to any other wickedness amongst them. Hence also malefactors, when at the Gallows they have made their dying Confessions, they have laid on hardest upon this sin, as the rise of those which brought them at length to that sad end, that they regarded not their Fathers, they despised their Mothers, were unruly, and disobedient Children to their Parents; Ah, will some then say, the good counsels which our fathers, or our mothers gave us, but, wretches that we were, we would never hearken to them, nor regard them. Let all good people take warning by us, and let all young men or women that hear us, for ever take heed, by our example, how you despise your Parents, or slight their Counsels, or rebukes.
The second reason is taken from the law and 2. Because this is made of such weight by the Law and light of nature and of nations light of nature and nations, which have put a like weight upon this duty of Honour of Parents, making it as next to the honour of God himself. Pythoragus, having given the priority to the worship of the Gods (as the poor Pagan calleth them, [...], and so goeth on speaking of their divine worship: and then immediatly addeth, [...]—It is in short but thus. First, honour nour God, as by the Law is appointed, then hothy Parents. And mind his speech, that he maketh this by Law appointed: even by the Law of nature and nations; For no other Law had these Heathens. So Phocyllides, in his admonitory Poem also saith, [...], First honour God, and after that thy Parents. So Plato in his booke of Lawes, first he provideth for the worship of God, and in the next place for the Honour of Parents. So Aristotle, Eth. l. 8. c. 16. He joyneth Honour of Parents next to that of God: and saith, That to neither, can sufficient honour be given, onely he that according to his utmost ability honoureth them, he is (saith he) the truly pious person to God, and to Parents. So Isocrates, in his Admonitory Oration to Demonicus, counselleth and chargeth him thus, [...]. Fear God, honour also Parents. Aelian in his 3. book, c. 21. telleth a story, that when the Greeks took Troy, pittying the miseries of their captives, they caused it to be proclamed, that every free Citizen should carry out some one principall thing which they should most desire: hereupon Aeneas neglecting other matters, carried out his Gods (as they call them) the Greeks liking well his piety, permitted [Page 13] him to take some other thing which he should most desire: he then taketh up his aged Father, and carrieth him out next upon his shoulders: with which act they were so affected, that they gave him all his goods and treasures also: thus by the dim light of corrupt nature, the poor Pagan is directed to place Parents honour next to Divine. But our glorious Lord and Law-giver to shew the great weight of this duty, he will not leave it to be inforced by natures Law or light only, but he will adde his morall sanction of it, as his own promulged Law, and he will not doe it in more obscure termes, or so as only to be drawn by Consequence, but this shall be expressed in so many words; It shall be written as in Capitall Letters, that every one that runneth may read it, and none may plead excuse or exemption; yea the Command it self shall be expressed in so few and so familiar words, that the least Child, who can remember any thing, shall be able to remember this, and even with its milk, almost, drink in this principle of Honour of Parents.
3. Because the Lord annexeth no particular promise to any other of the ten Commandements, 3. Because a promise is added only to this Commandement but to this. In which sense the Apostle speaking of this Commandement saith, It is the first Commandement with promise, Eph. 6. 2. Its a signe then that this duty above many others, is of great account with God, and of greatest concernment unto man, and that the blessings of promise are wont more manifestly, and plentifully to follow, the obedience to this Commandement, then to any of the rest of the Commandements of the second table at least, which have no promise at all 4. Because the blessings promised to this, are of greatest moment. annexed to them, neither generall or speciall.
4. Because the blessing here promised, and [Page 14] made as the Argument to move to obedience to this Commandement, is of so great moment and concernenent; as being life it self, and the continuance of it, and blessing upon it. And what more desirable, of all temporall blessings, then life? Skin for skin, and all that a man hath, will he give for his life. What more usefull a blessing then this? whereby a man hath so much opportunity afforded and continued to him, to get and to do the best and the most good, and to bring in the most glory to God? What more delightfull a blessing then this, the very notion whereof is used in Scripture, to expresse the glorious and transcendent joyes and delights, as of the kingdome of grace, here, so of that of glory, hereafter? so in Deut. 30. 15, 19. I set before thee life. Rom. 8. 6. To be spiritually minded is life. Act. 11. 18. Repentance unto life. Psal. 36. 9. With thee is the fountaine of life. John. 3. 36. He shall not see life.
CHAP. II. Of Honour in generall due to Parents.
HAving explained the words of the 5. Commandement, & shewn the weight of the duty therein injoyned to Children; we now come to make further inquiry into the duty it self, which we shall consider of, in the method propounded. 1. More Generally. 2. More particulaly. First then of Honour of Parents in a generall consideration, wherein we shall, 1. Consider what kind and manner of honour, this honour of Parents, [Page 15] so generally considered, must be. 2. Make some uses thereof. To the first inquiry we answer, 1. Honour not due to Parents which is, 1. In way of dishoner to God. Negatively, what Honour is not due to Parents; 2. Affirmatively, what manner of Honour is due; In a negative way we say the Honour of Parents
1. It must not be in any way of dishonour to God, either by sinnes of Omission or of Commission. Children must not so respect, esteem, and love Father or Mother, as to love, and prefer them in their respects to the Lord. He that loveth Father or Mother more then me, is not worthy of me, saith Christ, Matth. 10. 37. Children may not be so transported with affection to Parents, as thereby to be hindered from a call of Christ, or attending upon it. As he in Luk. 9. 65. when called to follow Christ, would have gon first and buried his Father, but vers. 60. is answered by Christ, Let the dead bury their dead, but go thou and preach the Kingdome of God; or as the other in Luk. 9. 61. that would ingage to follow Christ, but he would first bid farewell to those at home, namely, Parents, Kindred, &c. But Jesus Christ accounteth such inordinacy of affection, in those who professe to set their faces towards heaven, to be a looking back to the world, and the like, and therefore vers. 62. Jesus said unto him, No man having put his hand to the Plough, and looking back, is fit for the Kingdome of God. Children may not have such carnall affection to Parents, or be so glued to them, as not to be able to part with them, and forsake them, and deny themselves in them, for the sake of Christ, when they are thereunto called. The Spouse of Christ, Solomons Antitype, must forget her Kindred, and Fathers house, for her Lords sake, and nearer Communion with him, Psal. 45. 10. Children may [Page 16] not so love Father or Mother, as out of respect to them, to forsake Christs truth, or faith, or to imbrace any thing contrary to the faith or truth of Christ, (a sin too common amongst the Children of Papists and other Heretiques and Opinionists) this is also to love them more then Christ. Better that the Daughter, in such a case of Christs faith and truth, be at variance against the Mother, that she contend, even with her, for Christs truth, for the faith once delivered to the Saints, that she beat down with all her might the Mothers errors and evils. In which case also, Christ saith, Matth. 10. 35. He commeth to set a man at variance against his own Father, and the Daughter against her Mother. He that more desireth after his Parents presence, then after the Lords, or more delighteth in them, then in the Lord himself, or is more moved in their causes, then in the Lords, or is more troubled for them, and their disgrace, then for the Lords dishonour, or the like, he doth not honour his Parents according to Gods mind and heart; yea, he that comparatively, and where the love of Father or Mother, and the love of Christ, are not compatible, where the condition and case is so qualified, that love to Parents, and love to Christ, become flat contraries, and must one give place to the other, one or the other must be laid aside, in such a case, He that hateth not his very Father and Mother, cannot be Christs Disciple, Luk. 14. 26. In such a case Godly zealous Levi is commended, Deut. 33. 9. Who said to his Father and his Mother, I have not seen him. The like might be said in that honour of Reverence and Fear; Children may not be so afraid of Parents, or of their frownes, or blowes, or distastes, or disinheritings, &c. as not to be afraid [Page] of Gods displeasure, but to adventure that in some way of sin, rather then run the hazzard of [...] Fathers or Mothers displeasure. Christ [...] his Mothers displeasure or rebuke, so as▪ [...] her sake to omit any duty to God his Father, or to neglect his heavenly Fathers business. [...], in answer to that check of Maries, Luk. 2. 48. Son, why hast thou thus dealt with us? behold, thy Father and I have sought thee sorrowing, he sayth vers. 49. Wist ye not that I must be about my fathers business? [...] was a notable speech of that Pagan Priest, C [...]r [...]alus, being to sacrifice, and at the same time required to come away to his Father, he boldly answered, He must first dispatch the duties of publick Religion, or of Religion which was of publick Concernment, and after that those of private piety to Parents. Children must indeed honour their Parents Counsels and Commands with the honour of obedience and observance, yet not so as in a way of dishonour to God, to neglect what he requireth, or to do any thing which he forbideth. Ahaziah King of Judah is branded for this, 2. Chron. 22. 3. That he walked in the waies of the house of Ahab, for his Mother was his counsellour.
2. It must not be in way of Inaequality to either Parent. The Father is not to be preferred 2. With In equality to either Parents. by the Child as a Child, before the Mother; or the Mother more loved, reverenced, obeyed or recompensed then the Father. The Parents are equally Parents, and equall causes of the Children, and so by the law of nature, as Parents, they are to share equally in the honour of such instrumentall causes of the be ing of their Children. Hence though in Exod. 20. 12. [Honour thy Father and thy Mother] the Father is set before the Mother, yet in Lev. 19. 3. (which is an exposition of the 5. [Page 18] Commandement) the Mother is set before the Father [Yee shall fear every man his Mother, & every man his Father] to shew, that the Father being set before the Mother, for honour, which comprehendeth fear; and the Mother being set before the Father, for fear, which is a speciall branch of honour; they are both alike for honour in the generall, and for fear in speciall. This, Willet in his sixfold Commentary upon Leviticus; and Ainsworth in his notes upon Levit. 19. 3. They both do note from Maimony. So Musculus in his common places, and exposition of this fifth Commandement, he noteth; ‘that Gods command is for honouring, not the Father onely, but the Mother: God saith not, Honour thy Father, but addeth, and thy Mother; the Mother indeed is the Fathers inferiour, according to the Law of conjugall subjection, and likewise she is by nature, and Sex, the weaker vessell; but the Child is not thence to draw an argument, that he must think the more despicably of his Mother; for that difference that is made in wedlock, betwixt the husband, and the wife, appertaineth not to him, but he must look to that relation, which is betwixt Mother and Son; what ever she be, in respect of her husband, to thee she is a Mother, and together with thy Father to be equally honoured; since that for this, that thou might'st be born, she did equally cooperate, yea rather much more; for who can weigh sufficiently, what a heap of troubles, the womb big with Child bringeth along with it? how great are the sorrows of bringing forth? how many and great are the perils? so that it is not in vain said, in sorrow shalt thou bring forth. Lastly how cumbersome is the suckling of the Child, and the care [Page 19] of it, whil'st in the Cradle? so that they greatly sin, which transfer all the Honour due in common to their Parents, unto their Father onely, and care not how they set by their Mothers, so they can but gratifie their Father;’ thus far Musculus; and verily in Prov. 1. 8. Both are given in equall charge: My Son, hear the instruction of thy Father; and forsake not the Law of thy Mother; so in Prov. 6. 20. My Son, keep thy Fathers Commandements; and forsake not the Law of thy Mother. And why else is there an equall reward, even long life, equally promised to the Honour of Mothers, as to that of Fathers, if the Honour of the one be not equall to that of the other? or why else is the dishonour of the Mother, as well as of the Father, equally put under the same curse? Deut. 27. 16. Cursed be he that setteth light by his Father, or his Mother, and all the people shall say, Amen. Or why is the same punishment of Justice to be equally inflicted for smiting the Mother, as well as the Father, being made equally death, Ex. 20. 15. or for cursing the Mother, as well as the Father, or for stubbornness, in not obeying the Mothers voice, as well as the Fathers, being also equally made deaht, Exod. 24. 17. Deut. 21. 18, 19, 20, 21. If the Honour of the Mother, by the Childe, be not equall to that of the Father? where there is, by God himself, one and the same reward of grace equally promised, as to the Honour, and the same punishment of Justice equally threatned, as to the dishonour, as well of the Mother, as of the Father, there is the same Honour equally due, by the will of God, to the Mother, as is to the Father; but to the former Scriptures shew, that God equally promiseth the same reward of grace [Page 20] to the Childs Honour, and equally threatens the same punishment of Justice, to the Childs dishonour, as well of the Mother, as of the Father; therefore the Honour due, according to God, from the Child as a Child, to his Mother, as is to his Father, is equall and equally due.
3. It must not be a bare pretended, and formall 3. Meerly formall and in pretence onely. kind of Honour of Parents. Such was that in Absolom, who feignedly pretendeth such Honour of respect to his Father, that he had rather die, then not to be reconciled to his Father, and enjoy his Fathers favour, 2 Sam. 14. 32. Wherefore (saith he to Joab,) am I come up from Geshur? It had been good for me to have been there still: now therefore let me see the Kings face, and if there be iniquity in me, let him kill me; but his devilish plot so soon after, against his Father (Chap. 15. 7. 10.) shewed, that all that, was but bare pretence, and not reality of respect to his Father. So in that young man, professing to Christ, that he had kept all the Commandements, and so the fifth, instanced in Matth. 19. 19, 20. and that from his youth up, he had begun the practice of Honour of Father & Mother betimes, and to that day continued it; but the issue shewed, that he never conscientiously, sincerely, and really, Honour'd his Father and Mother, but in a meer formal, and outside way and manner, even in the same sort, as he kept the other Commandements, being never the nearer entrance into heaven, notwithstanding all that, like him, in the parable of the two sons, Matth. 21. 28. 30. that pretendeth Honour of obedience to his Father: for when his Father saith to him, Son, go to work to day in my Vineyard; he readily, and humbly (in shew at least) answereth, I go Sir, but went not. It was onely pretence, and dissimulation.
[Page 21] 4. Look that it be not a base selfish, self-ended 4. Meerly Selfish. Honouring of Father, or Mother, for hope of gain by them, and so making much of them, whil'st some requests, or desires of the Child are answered, his ends furthered, or fulfilled; some large Portions gotten out of their hands, or large fleeces gain'd out of their outward estates; like the yonger Son in the parable, that will be giving his Father's Titles of Honour, whil'st he hath fingred his Portion (as he calleth it,) Luke 15. 12 [Father] give me my Portion; but vers. 13. not many day after, he gathereth up all he hath, and leaveth his Father. Now his Father is not in such request with him; the Text saith, he took his journey, but not a word of this, that he asketh his Father leave, or asketh his Fathers advice that way: Father shall I take such a journey? no verily, let his Father like it, or dislike it, he now careth not, he hath gotten what he looked for from him, and now fare him well, he careth to be under his Fathers watch no more, he regardeth neither his Company, nor his Counsell, &c. so Absolom, Oh! his Fathers face and presence, it is all in all to him, he cannot live without it, one would think, if he speak his heart, 2 Sam. 14. let me see the Kings face—or if iniquity be in me, let him kill me, and vers. 33. when permitted to come into his Fathers presence, he boweth himself on his very face to the ground before him; what would you have more in a Son? ah! but all this was for base and by ends. Absoloms ambitious designes, reaches, and ends, could not so well be furthered by living as retired, and exiled from the Court, though come to Jerusalem; but at the Court, and near the place of judicature, whither the subjects from all parts of the Kingdome repair frequently for Justice, there he [Page 22] hath opportunity to lay his traines, 2 Sam. 15. 2. without suspition of any, he sitteth by the gate, the place of judicature and resort, and he asketh each one, of what tribe art thou? ver. 3. and biddeth them, look that thy matter be good and right: (As if he were very sollicitous of Right twixt man and man:) but withall telleth them, there is none deputed by the King to hear thee. Now he beginneth closely to scatter seeds of prejudice, and discontent in the subjects against the present government set over them: then vers. 4. wisheth in their hearing, Oh that I were Judge in the Land, that every man which hath any sute or cause, might come to me, and I would do him Justice: now he speaketh a good word for himself to be thought of, and put in some chief place in the state, and vers. 5. every subject that cometh near him must have his hand, he must take him, he must imbrace him, and kiss him; and no wonder that now he hath, as v. 6. even stollen away the hearts of the men of Israel; Oh thinketh every one, what a worthy and hopefull Prince is this, how sollicitous that every man do right, and have right done him! how marvellous kind, and condescending to the meanest subject, he would surely make us, in time, a very good King, &c. Now Absolom hath plaid his game well thus far, it remaineth onely that Absolom, in pretence at least, give his Father the Honour of going by his leave to Hebron; a place fittest to hatch the Treason against his Father, which he hath been all that while brooding, and where that fire may flame out best, which he hath been kindling; this leave is easily gained from his Father, vers. 7, 8, 9. he hath 200 men to attend him to Hebron, and when thither come, Achitophel is sent for, the conspiracy is ripened, and numbers of Associates [Page 23] daily increase, and good David soon perceiveth his mistake in his Sons pretended submission and obeisance. Yea but the fifth Commandment would cut off all such Attractives to selfish Honour of Parents, and therefore saith, Honour thy Father and thy Mother, namely poor or rich, high or low, as well I that hath nothing to give, and leave thee, as that hath never so much: hence when Christ would shew upon what, as upon their bottome and basis, all the commands of God, either respecting God or men, do hang and depend, he saith, Matth. 22. 37, 38. Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all tby heart; this is the first and great Commandement, and vers. 39. the second is like to this; Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thy self, and vers. 40. On these two Commandements hang all the Law, and the Prophets; those are the two wel-springs of all obedience to the Law and word of God; and therefore all the particulars are reducible to those two heads; if the Honour of respect, reverence, or obedience, which we give to God, be not from love to our selves, or to our own ends, but to himself, then it is honouring of God indeed; so if our honour, which we give to our Parents, be not from love to our selves, but it is from intire love to them, that we shew forth such respect, or reverence, or obedience, or thankfulness to them, now it is Honour of Parents indeed. Again, as it must not be Honour of Parents from self-love, as opposed to intire love of Parents, so it must not be from self-love, as opposed to love of God; the love of whom especially, should put Children upon Honouring the Image of his Father-hood, in their Parents; hence in that, Levit. 19. 3. Ye shall fear every man his Mother and Father, why so? I am the Lord [Page 24] thy God; and so thy Father in Covenant, and Covenant-mercies and priviledges, a Father of mercies promised and offered to them, &c. therefore out of love to me, Honour, every one of you, his Parents. And as Childrens honour of Parents must not be selfish, in reference to love of self-profit, and preferment, or the like, so neither in reference to love of self-ease, or meer immunity from punishments, or corrections, in any contrary way of dishonour; whether from Parents privately, or the civil Magistrate, publickly; if Childrens Honour of reverence, and obedience, which they outwardly hold forth, should be extracted chiefly from the force of Parents austere carriage, or threats, or blows, or the dread of the correction from civill Authority, or the like, it is a slavish, and not a filiall Honouring of them; when Paul would express, in a word, that Timothy served with him in the Gospel, neither formally, nor feignedly, nor selfishly, nor slavishly, nor forcedly; but freely, sincerely, and regularly; he expresseth it thus, Phil. 2. 22. As the Son with the Father, he hath served with me in the Gospel; the Honour then of a Son to the Father is, or should be, neither feigned, formall, selfish, nor slavish.
2 In an affirmative way, we say the Honour Honour of Parents must be 1. Cordiall. of Parents,
1. It must be cordiall; not alone God, as a Father, must have each of his Childrens hearts, in all the Honour they give him, as his Sons and Daughters, but Solomon, as a Father, may groundedly say, as Prov. 23. 26. My Son, give me thy heart: namely, as that which must crown all the Honour, which thou my Son must give me as thy Father; thus Timothy serveth with Paul in the Gospel, as with his Father, by grace, as an ingenious [Page 25] Son with his Father at any other work; namely, with all his heart, Phil. 2. 22.
2. It must be constant; as long as the relation 2. Constant. holdeth firm twixt Parent and Child, which is as long as they Coexist in this world, and till one of the Relates are taken away by death, Parents from Children, or Children from Parents; they must obey this morall precept, which bindeth semper & ad semper, alwaies and to all times; Honour thy Father and Mother, hath no prefixed time set to it. It is not Honour thy Father and Mother whil'st a little one, whil'st a youth, whil'st so or so old, whil'st in a single condition, or with the like limitations, no; but it is without restraint and limitation to ages, sexes, conditions, places, relations, callings, imployments; it is for term of life, and that to which each one, Male or Female, younger or elder, married or unmarried, learned or unlearned, godly or ungodly, high or low, Prince or Peasant, rich or poor is bound unto, hence also that, Prov. 23. 22. despise not thy Mother when she is old: when she was young, yea, when she was middle aged, or the like, thou prisedst, and respectedst, and didst reverence and obey her, do it as well when she is old; hold on doing of it, to the last. Age may wear and waste a Mothers beauty, strength, parts, senses, limbs, estate, &c. but her relation of a Mother is as the Sun, when he goeth forth in his might, for the ever of this life, that is alwayes in its meridian, and knoweth no evening; the person may be gray-headed, but her Motherly relation, is ever in its flourish. It may be Autumn, yea, Winter with the woman, but with the Mother, as a Mother, it is alwayes Spring. Look as that precious daughter Ruth said, even to her Mother [Page 26] in Law, Naomi, whither thou goest, I will go, and where thou lodgest, I will lodge, thy people shall be my people: and thy God my God; the Lord do so to me, and more also, if ought but death part thee and me, Ruth. 1. 16, 17. so, and much more, if more may be, would become every Son and Daughter, even to ingage themselves, and that for term of life, to Honour their own Fathers and Mothers, both in way of direct Honour, by sharing with them, in doing and suffering, and by being tenderly respective, and observant of them, and usefull, and serviceable to them, wherever they become, or into what condition soever the Lord may cast them; and in a way of reflect Honour, by personall, and reall owning of their Godly Fathers and Mothers, God and people, that they shall be theirs. And as Ruth fulfilled actually what she so solemnly ingaged, that way; so should any one Son or daughter much rather, be to their own Father and Mother better every way than seven Sons, Ruth 4. 15. Joseph also did not onely Honour his Father when he was a youth, but continued honouring of his Father to the last, so long as he had a Father left to Honour, albeit long after he was married, and so highly exalted, witness that Gen. 46. 29. and 47. 31. and 48. 12.
3. It must be compleat and full, not alone outwardly, 3. Compleat. but inwardly, not in some lawfull and good things or way, but in all, and that in all places, and upon all occasions: yea every part of them, which is capable of giving Honour to Parents, must do their part of filiall homage, and contribute their share to this common treasury of Honour in generall due to Parents; Parents have been Fathers of the Childrens bodies, and preparatory, and effective instruments of the being of [Page 27] their souls in their bodies; so that head, tongue, eyes, cares, hand and knee, feet, and the like bodily parts in their way, and likewise the mind in its thoughts, the understanding and judgement in its conceptions, and apprehensions, dictates, and esteem: the heart and will in its dispositions and affections, &c. All and each of these must render their proportions of due Honour to the instruments of their being; hence that before mentioned of Solomon to his Son, Prov. 23. 26. My Son, give me thy heart, and let thine eyes observe my wayes: heart and eyes, soul and body, must joyn in filiall homage of his Son, to him, as his Father.
4. It must be impartiall, without respect to 4. Impartiall. them as rich onely, or otherwise great in the world, or the like; for if very poor, their Honour from their Children must be never a whit the less; if Mary the Mother of Christ, be the espoused wife of Joseph, a poor Carpenter, it is all one to Christ, as if she had been a Princes spouse, he is subject to them, as a child, Luk. 2. 51. he went down with them to Nazareth, and was subject to them; the command of God knoweth no persons, distinguisheth not of such a Father, or such and such a Mother, but chargeth the Child, Honour thou thy Father and thy Mother, be he, or she, poor or rich, noble or ignoble, high or low, of meaner parts or of more accomplished abilities, comely and personable, or deformed and in stature more despicable; yea be they of better and sweeter tempers, or be they of a more harsh, hasty, and rigid disposition, yet as servants must be subject to their Masters, with all fear, not onely to the good and gentle, but also to the froward, 1 Pet. 2. 18. so must Children much rather give Honour to their Parents, [Page 28] whether of better or worser tempers.
5. It must be in a way of eminency: being such 5. In a way of eminency. Honour as is next in order to that Honour due to God himself, the Hebrew word [...] applied to persons, or things, in a way of good, most frequently signifieth to make weighty in honour, or glory, or to give some eminent and transcendent measure of Honour and Glory; hence that phrase, 2 Cor. 4. 17. weight of glory: Speaking of that surpassing—glory of heaven; the same Hebrew verb, which is used in my Text, is sometimes used for magnifying of God, Psal. 22. 23. Magnifie him all ye seed of Jacob (as the Geneva translation well rendereth it;) or make him great, ponderous, weighty in glory; but by our New translation, it is commonly rendered, glorisie, or make glorious, or eminently Honour. So Psal. 86. 9. they shall glorifie thy name; and vers. 12. I will glorifie thy name; and Psal. 50. 23. he glorifies me, Levit. 10. 3. I will be glorified. So. Ezek. 28. 22. The same verb here made use of to express the Honour of Parents, as is to express the glory of God; It sheweth evidently, that it is no ordinary measure of Honour, which Children owe to their Parents; the very name and relation of a Father and Mother, is a glorious thing, and hath glory and excellency in it; the word derived from this verb [...] in the Text is used to denominate, and point out peculiar excellency, as Exod. 28. 2. Aarons garment must be made [...] for glory, or garments of peculiar excellency, Gen. 45. 13. shew him all my glory [...] my eminency of Honours, Authority, Respect, and the like; and the verb it self is made such use of Esay 43. 3, 4. thou hast been honourable, or glorious, as others render it, or most eminent in Honour, in Hebrew [Page 29] [...]; and Psal. 87. 2. [...] glorious things, or matters of transcendent, and renouned excellency, are spoken of thee; now the same word used here must needs note peculiar eminency of Honour of Parents to be due from their Children.
Let us now make application of what hath been spoken.
The use serveth, 1. For Reproof, and that, 1. Use of Reproof. 1. Of Children for dishonour of Parents. 1. Of Children; for their dishonouring, slighting, and despising of their Fathers and Mothers. It was of old reproved sharply in those of Jerusalem, in Ezek. 22. 7. Formerly mentioned, In thee they have set light by Father and Mother. Solomon brandeth the fool, or unregenerate person for this, as his vile property, Prov. 15. 20. the foolish man despiseth his Mother; this is point blanck crosse to the fifth Commandement. It is highest injustice not to give even your Parents their due; one should think none should cut their Parents short of their right; now this Honour is their right: and therefore it is highest injustice in any Child, to debar them of their right. The word in Ezek. 22. 7. [...] is directly opposite to the Hebrew word used in my Text, And it signifieth to make lighter, or to make abatement of due weight, or measure of any thing; as say of Honour, of credit, of commodities, or the like. It is used in Jonah 1. 5. For the Mariners lightning their ship, by casting out the good wares in it, as forced by a storm to do that, which had they done in another case, it had been manifest wrong, and injustice to the owners; of all others, Parents should not be scanted and pinched, and that by you, their own Children, of their just weight and measure, but rather have it upheaped, or pressed down, or running over; if God in other cases, would have no [Page 30] unrighteousness in meteyards, in weight, or in measure, but have just ballances, just weights, a just Ephah, and a just Hin, Levit. 19. 35, 36. Much more would he have no unrighteousness in weight or measure here. And if in other matters the scant measure be so abominable to God and good men, Mic. 6. 10. Much more is a scant measure of filiall Honour. But that we may the better meet with this sin in all sorts: Here is to be reproved
1. Childrens slighting their Parents instructions, 1. By slighting Parents instructions or rebukes. directions, reproofs, or corrections; this is made a black brand of a person yet unregenerate, Prov. 15. 5. The Fool (or unregenerate person) despiseth his Fathers instruction. Know it therefore, who ever you are, be your pretences to Religion whatsever they may be, yet you are graceless persons, who Honour not your Parents Counsels, or instructions, but slight and undervalue them; this is made also the very trick of a scorner, and that is somewhat worse, Prov. 13. 1. a scorner heareth not rebuke-namely, not of his own Father; for it is opposed to that, A wise son heareth his fathers instructions. Yea this is made a very brutish sin, Prov. 12. 1. he that hateth reproof, is brutish. And if the rejecting others just reproof, be so inhumane, so unreasonable a sin, verily the contempt of parentall reproofs is so much rather. I had almust said it is worse then brutish; For the brute creatures, as, say, young birds, or beasts, they do not sleight the hints which the old ones give them, of what they should shun, or what they should desist from, or what way they should take, or the like; (as experience witnesseth in many particulars, I need not instance) yea, it is a deadly token of a person, either already given up to hardness of heart, and so to be ruined, or of one [Page 31] that is at the brink of such a pit. 1 Sam. 2. 25. It is said of Elias Sons, whom he had even too gently reproved for their gross sins; notwithstanding they harkned not unto the voice of their Father, because the Lord would destroy them; such persons do but even despise their own souls, and their peace and welfare here and hereafter, Prov. 15. 32. he that refuseth instruction, despiseth his own soul; which if true of refusing others, much more of refusing Parents good instructions; one may safely say to any such Son or Daughter, surely thou carest not what becometh of thy soul; but let all such despisers of Parents counsels, instructions, or reproofs, especially in matters respecting their souls, I say let all such know & tremble to consider it, that all those despised instructions, and reproofs, will one day be as so many stings of Adders in your hearts, the venome wherof will even drink up your spirits; they wil be as so many viols of oyl to the flame, in your fired consciences, here, or in hell, or both, which will make your tormenting flames, more raging, lasting and tormenting. See in Prov. 5. 11, 12, 13. in the deboist youngster, that never cared a pin for any counsels, or rebukes, which Parents, Friends, Masters, or Ministers gave to him, when in his ruff of vanity, but when under Gods dreadfull hand, and his conscience withall awakened, then this is that, in speciall, which galleth him, that he hath not inclined his eares to them which instructed him (and so not to his very Parents also.)—And thou mourn at the last, when thy flesh, and thy body are consumed, and say, how have I hated instruction, and my heart despised reproof, and have not obeyed the voice of my teachers, nor inclined mine ear to them which instructed me. 2. By slighting their Commands.
2. It reproveth Childrens slighting Parents injunctions [Page 32] or commands, Prov. 30. 17. The eye that despiseth to obey his Mother, the Ravens of the valley shall pick it out; that is, some suddain, strange, shamefull and remarkable Judgement of God, in wayes, and by means unlikely, shall befall them, and they that whil'st living, would not honour Parents, but despise them, when they are dead, they shall not be honoured, as other men, but like beasts rather then men, they shall be cast out in contempt, as not deserving the common Honour of rationall persons, when dead, to be buried. As their sin is more unnatural; and inhumane, so shall their usage be, when dead.
3. It reproveth Childrens sleighting their Parents watch and government, like the younger 3. By slighting their watch. Son in the parable, Luk. 15. 12, 13. (often made use of upon divers occasion, in this discourse) they must needs be for themselves, and before they are fitted for it, or called to it, they will leave their Fathers: but you may be reckoned, with that prodigal, to be persons that while besides your selves: as the effect proved in him; for he slighting his Fathers presence, guidance and provision, he was blasted in his way, and soon took such loose courses, as brought him low enough; and the like will befall all such like youngsters, in their way of flighting their Parents watch and government; if Dinah paid so dearly for that little gadding fit of hers from her Fathers house, as to fall under such sin and shame, of being deflowred by a stranger, Gen. 34. 1, 2. What will be the sin and shame of such Sons or Daughters, of whom we are now speaking? It may be said of Children, who out of some lust of pride, or discontent, will be leaving of Parents, and forsaking their watch and tuition, when they are not called to it, [...] in Prov. [Page 33] 27. 8. As a bird that wandreth from her neast, so is a man that wandereth from his place; the fittest, best, and safest place for the young bird, is her neast, where the old ones will be providing well for it, and watching carefully of it, that it come to no hurt, but when the young bird, before it be fitted to flie abroad with safety and strength, to watch over it self, or shift for it self, yet will needs be hopping out of its neast, and wandring thence, it becommeth a prey to every bird of prey, and commonly commeth by some means or other to ruine by it.: So if young persons will needs be leaving their Fathers house, which is their neast and place, before they are called to it, or fitted for it, mischief is commonly the issue of it. As it is said of Cain in his case, going out from his Fathers house, that he went out from the presence of God; so it may be said of Childrens leaving Parents houses in such a way of dishonour of Parents, they go from Gods presence: and let not any such Children ever look for Gods gracious presence with you in any such way, but the terrifying presence rather of his justice and displeasure pursuing you, as it did wandring Cain, who therefore could not long rest in any place wheresoever he came. It may be also said of such like Children, as of him in Luke 13. that in this way left his Fathers house, that he was lost and dead; and so are these among the number of persons spiritually dead, and if ever, by grace, they come to themselves, as it is said of him in the parable, Luke 15. 17. Surely they will lay on hard upon this sin of dishonour of Parents above all other sins, as he did: whence that speech thereupon: Father, I have sinned against heaven, and before thee, and am no more worthy to be called thy Son.
[Page 34] 4. It reproveth Childrens less honouring, or 4. By slighting Parents when aged, or decayed. slighting of Parents, when they are old, or decayed in strength, estate, or the like: contrary to that express charge of God, Prov. 23. 22. despise not thy Mother when she is old. It was the sin of Samuels Sons, that when he was old, they cared not for his counsels, or checks, or imitation of his godly course, witness that, they walked not in the steps of their Father, then, 1 Sam. 8. 5. So Adonijah, when his Father was old and decrepit, he without regard to his Fathers mind, counsell, or leave, is ready to leap into his throne, 1 Kings 1. 5. but these had dishonour from others, as their punishment, for this dishonour of their Parents, which was their sinne. The people as little regard Judge Samuels Sons, 1 Sam. 8. 5. as they did their Father. And Adonijah, whose sin it was not to Honour his Father when he was old, in way of punishment, hath not the Honour of a Brother, much less of an Elder Brother to Solomon, but is brought to an untimely and dishonourable end. That Son or daughter, who despiseth Father, or Mother, when old, seldome liveth to be old.
5 It reproveth the guile of Children, in pretending 5. By bare semblances of Honour of them. to Honour Father or Mother, when in heart they slight them; like Absolom (formerly mentioned) pretending to Honour his Father, but intending by—and base ends—or like him in that parable forementioned, Matth. 21. 30. When his Faither saith, go and work in my vineyard to day, he saith, I go Sir, but went not. Who will such be true to, if you be not true to your own Parents? Hence, when the sin of dishonour of Parents aboundeth, here and there, that is accounted a perfidious time and place. And God in judgement will order it, that none shall trust [Page 35] such, as have been perfidious dishonourers of Parents, albeit they may have never such promising qualifications, or relations, in other respects. Mic. 7. 5. Trust yee not in a friend, put not confidence in a guide, keep the doors of thy mouth from her that lyeth in thy bosome: why so? for the Son Honoureth not the Father, the Daughter riseth up against her Mother.
6. It reproveth Childrens disgracing, or any 6. By disgracing Parents. way reproaching of their Parents: You are ill birds, which thus defile your own nests. It was a vile sin in Absolom, secretly to disgrace his Fathers government, as if careless in it, and neglective of what concerned him to look after, 1 Sam. 15. 3. there is no man deputed of the King to hear thee, (saith that Sycophant) this was Chams sin to discover his Fathers nakedness to his reproach, Gen. 9. 22, 25. Cham the Father of Canaan, saw his Fathers nakedness, and went and told his brethren without (namely in a reproachfull way) but Absolom, and Chams stories shew, that they had reproach for reproach in the issue: and God will assuredly mete out to such like Children, like reproach, either from their Children in after times, or from others, as a just punishment of their reproaching their own Parents.
7. It reproveth persons younger or elder, having 7. By rayling against Parents. Parents living, that you now at any time, or formerly, use railing, reviling, girding, taunting, or upbraiding speeches to them, or of them, Prov. 30. 11. There is a generation that curseth their Father, and doth not bless their Motber; but such are so odious and inhumane, that God singleth out Children of that sort, to be cut off by the hand of civill Authority, Exod. 21. 17. Levit. 20. 9. He that curseth Father, or Mother, let him die [Page 36] the death, which command of God, Christ himself vindicateth from the Pharisees undermining traditions, Mark. 7. 9, 10. Or if such a sin pass the cognizance, or vengeance of earthly Judges, yet the Lord himself will not suffer such to escape his hand, Prov. 20. 20. who so curseth Father, or Mother, his Lamp shall be put out in obscure darkness. He shall come to a loathsome, noisome, dishonourable, and untimely end, as a Lamp, or Candle, that might have burned and shined much Mischiefs attending dishonour of Parents. longer, but is suddainly put, or blown out, and that with a stinking Savour left. And that Children of all sorts, sexes and Ages, may more deeply consider, and lay to heart, this sin of dishonour of Parents, let them look wistly and advisedly, upon the mischiefs also which attend this sin.
1. It maketh way in you, for all other sins. In 1. It maketh way for other sins. Cain, this let in fratricide, in Absolom, who also regarded not Parents, or their guidance or Counsels, it let in parricide, intentionally, 2 Sam. 17. 3, 4. He never cordially honoured his Father, and when he thought he had an opportunity, he as little regarded his Fathers life. Adrammeleck and Sharezer, were, no doubt, such as had been traded in a way of dishonour of their Father Senacherib, that they durst lay their bloody hands upon him, to take away his life, who had, instrumentally, given them theirs, 2 Kings 19. 37. No doubt, but from this root of dishonourable thoughts of Jacob, sprung Rubens incest, Gen. 49. 5. else the very reverence of a Father, had deterred him from it. As the Prodigall in the Parable, he first breaketh this bond of Honour of Parents, and so sinneth against his Father, & then he is at liberty to commit the vilest acts of riot, excess, filthinest, &c. that youngster in Prov. 5. 11, 12, 13, 14 Who [Page 37] confesseth that it was his sin, to disregard any thing that Parents of others said to him, he also confesseth, that even in the midst of the Congregation, openly, and where the best means were to the contrary, he was almost in all evill.
2. It bringeth Parents just curses, and Gods 2. It brings a curse. curse also upon you, and upon your posterity. As Gen. 9. 22. 25. It brought upon Cham, and his posterity, by Canaan. Cham himself being no more exempted from that curse, albeit his Fathers curse light especially upon his posterity by Canaan, than Sem himself is exempted from his Father Noahs blessing, though he were also blessed in his posterity, especially by his Son Eber, and so Terah, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Yea this sin putteth you under the dint of the imprecation of the Church and Saints of God, Deut. 17. 16. Cursed be he that setteth light by his Father or his Mother, and all the people shall say, Amen. Ah miserable case of such as you are, who are, by Gods command, to be cursed by all the people of God!
3. It brings the exclusion of you, and of your 3. It brings exclusion from Gods Church. posterity, from the Church of God, and the priviledges thereof Cham, a dishonour of his Father, is, in that respect, as an outlary, and God will not have his Church to have any near civill, much less Sacred and Church-Communion, with his posterity by Canaan, Deut. 7. Cain, who flung off his Fathers Counsels, commands, rebukes, and watch, and went from his Fathers house like a very vagrand, Gen. 4. 16. His posterity are, in opposition to those of the Church, stiled the sons and daughters of men, not of God. Ishmael who regarded not his Father Abrahams displeasure, witness his mocking at his dearly beloved Son Isaac, he and his are cast out, and aftewards [Page 38] left out, as outlaries from the Church of Abraham. Esau likewise, who honoured not his Parents, witness his cross matching against their minds, he, and the Edomites which came from him, are excluded Church priviledges. The Moabites, and Ammonites, of Lots daughters, who so vilely dishonoured their Father Lot, were also, by Gods command, excluded Gods congregation, for many generations.
4. It bringeth commonly with it, the vilest 4. It brings vilest outward conditions. outward conditions: either for reproach, under which such Children, by Gods just hand, do lie; Shame is the portion of such who resuse instruction, especially of Parents, Prov. 13. 18. Or for poverty; poverty and shame shall be to him that refuseth instruction, ibid. Like as to him in the Parable, Luke 15. Who was brought to less than a morsell of bread, to husks and draff: Or for extreamest and basest servitude; like that prodigall scornfull Son, that would have been glad of the meanest hired servants place with that Citizen, Luke 15. 15. And is set about as mean imployment, to feed his swine, and as for his food, he must either eat with the swine, or fast and sterve, vers. 16, 17. Thus Cham in his posterity by Canaan (the beginner, in that vile act of dishonour, to Noah,) he is destinated to become the vilest of servants, or a servant of servants, Gen. 9. 2 [...]. Prov. 17. 2. a wise servant shall have rule over a Son that causeth shame. A Son that any way dishonoureth, or reproacheth his Parents, shall be put under the rule of a servant, made a servant of a servant. Or finally, this bringeth vilest conditions, in respect of hasty, and vilest deaths and ends, following the same, as was hinted before from Prov. 30. 17. and as is manifest in Absoloms end, 2 Sam. 18.
[Page 39] 2. This use serveth for reproof of Parents, who 2. Reproof of Parents undermining this Honour of theirs. 1. By bad examples of theirs. any way undermine this Honour, in generall, which is due to them from their Children. And that,
1. By giving them bad examples of dishonour to their own Parents. So did Cain to his posterity, and thence also was it, that they were so bad every way both to God-ward, and likewise to man-ward: their measure of sin was full, Gen. 6. 5. And so the flood swept that whole generation away; yea the posterity of Seth, did the like at that time, witness their taking wives of all that they themselves liked, not Honouring their Parents with their proper right, namely to choose wives for their Sons, when fit to be disposed in marriage, Gen. 6. 1, 2. And no wonder that their Children begotten in that 120. years space of Gods patience, vers. 3. they prove no better than those their Parents: for a little before the very entrance of Noah into the Ark, Noah onely is seen righteous, of all that generation, Gen. 7. 1. and all the rest of the generation, Fathers and Children, perished. Cham, the Grand-father, and Canaan the Father of the cursed race of the Canaanites, were both derisive spectators and informers of old Noahs nakedness: and thence also the Canaanites, their cursed posterity, they became in after times so notorious and shameless, in that very way and sin of dishonour of Parents,—for hence is it that Levit. 20. 9. When God had forbidden Cursing of Father and Mother, and vers. 11. The uncovering of a mans own Fathers wifes nakedness, or that of a mans own Mothers Sisters nakedness, vers. 9. vers. 23. He chargeth the Jewes not to walk in the manners of the Nations, which he casteth out before them (namely the [Page 40] Canaanites) for they committed all these things, namely, which were mentioned from vers. 9. to 22. Amongst which were those Acts of highest dishonour to Parents', even now instanced in: for which the Lord abhorred and rejected the Canaanites. The like might be said of the posterity of Ishmael & Esau; like Parents for exemplary dishonour to Parents, like Children, and posterity, or rather each posterity, successively, worse that way than their Fathers. As it was in Jobs case, that Father, or chief ruler, sometimes of the people, he was had in derision of some younger men, Job 30. 1. And no wonder, for vers. 8. he saith, they were Children of fooles, and of base men, who were more vile than the earth; their Parents therefore being as vile in their manners, as in their outward estates, no wonder that their Children had their civill Father in derision. So if Parents are vile towards their own naturall Fathers and Mothers, their Children commonly prove as bad that way also, as themselves. And it were good for Parents, when, to their grief, they see their Children are ready to curse, or slight, or any way dishonour them, to consider, whether they themselves have done as much to their Parents, and so beside the evill example, which they possibly set before their very children, that way, they have thereby provoked God to mete out to them, by their children, according to that measure of dishonour, that their Parents had from them. According to that word of Christ, Luke 6. 37, 38. With the same measure that yee mete withall, it shall be measured to you again. And like as Solomon telleth Masters, when they hear that their servants dishonour or curse them, that oftentimes their own hearts know, that themselves likewise have [Page 41] cursed others (even that were their Masters also) Eccles. 7. 21. And so they might the less wonder at such hard measures from their servants: the like might be said to Parents, in cases of their dishonour from their Children, that if your hearts know, that you have been faulty that way towards your Parents, it is no wonder that you are paid in your own Coyn, from your own Children.
2. By bringing any just blast upon their Children 2. By bringing some blast upon their Children. and posterity, through some other daring sins against God or man, so that even their posterity, in Gods just Judgement, become every way the worse, even in the matter of sin also against the first and second Table; thus also God visiteth the iniquity of the Fathers upon the Children, unto the third and fourth generation, according as is threatned for sins, against the second Commandemandement. As we see also in that fearfull example of the Jews, rejected together with all their posterity, and left unto all manner of wickedness against God or man, for the Parents rejecting of Christ, Rom. 11. 20. 1 Thessal. 2. 14, 15, 16. So God threatneth, Esay 14. 20. That the seed of evill doers shall never be renowned; and so not honoured so much before God or men, as to become true honourers of Parents. So Esay 9. 13. 16. That for the peoples stubborn going on in sin, threfore he will have no delight in their young men, vers. 17. The posterity of Cain, Cham, Ishmael and Esau, are dreadfull examples of such a judiciall blast of posterity, even in their very morals, for the high-handed sins of their Ancestours.
3. By neglect of good and pious education of 3. By neglect of pious education. children; when Parents bring up their Children rudely and profanely, carnally, and carelesly, or [Page 42] to meer world and the like, it causeth all kind of disorders in them, it corrupteth them in their morals; and you may thank your selves, if you have unnatural, irreverent, disobedient, or ingratefull Children of them; hence in the old world, when good education had been long neglected, in the very Families which came of Seth, who were of the Church, Sons of God, they also care not for their Parents Authority, or Authoritative interests in their disposall in marriage, but they took them wives of all that they themselves liked, albeit those Wifes were of the Daughters of men, of Cains brood, outlaries from the Church, as in Gen. 6. 1, 2. oft occasionally mentioned. So in Sodom, when good education was neglected, see how base the younger sort also were, Gen. 19. 4. from the youngest to the eldest they came to have forced those strangers (as they took them to be) at Lots house, and v. 14. Lots grave and godly Counsell to his Sons in Law, who had espoused his Daughters, It is derided by them. Hence in that sad time of the Apostacy of Judah, when the good man was perished out of the earth, and there was none upright amongst men, and so none (in comparison) that made conscience of that Parentall duty of good education of Children, then was the time when as the Son dishonoured the Father, and the Daughter riseth up against her Mother, as is expressed, Mic. 7. comparing v. 2. and 6. together.
4. By foolish humouring of their Children in their lusts: either in their Pride, or voluptuousness, 4. By humouring Children in vanity. or the like. Isaac himself smarted for it, for suffering his Son Esau, to give himself more to his sport in hunting, than any other better Imployment; for afterwards Esau slighting his Father [Page 43] and Mothers Authority and peculiar right in the matter of the choice of a Wife for him, as for their own Son, he without them chooseth himself a Wife, yea, two wives, and that of the a cursed brood of the Hittites, which were a grief of mind to Isaac, and to Rebeckah, Gen. 25. 27. Compared with Gen. 26. 34, 35. How many in greater Cities, by such foolish humouring of their Children, have them prove deboist?
5. By discontented, harsh, and rigid carriages, 5. By harshness to them. before, or at least towards Children. When the Apostle had charged Children to honour Parents, Eph. 6. 2, 3. he addeth, And ye Fathers provoke not your Children to wrath; namely, by your harsh and austere carriages towards them: For that will undermine Parents honour of respect from their Children, by alienating their hearts more from their Parents; and likewise their honour of Reverence, hardning their hearts against their Parents threats or blowes, so that they will grow more regardless of that displeasure and anger of their Parents, which they see so readily, so frequently, and sometimes in a manner so causelesly to be expressed: and likewise their Honour of Obedience, and therefore in Col. 3. 20. When Paul had charged Children to obey their Parents, vers. 21. Fathers (saith he) provoke not your Children to anger, lest they be discouraged, or wax heartlesse, and hopelesse to do or to set about any thing you require of them, so as to give you content: and so grow regardlesse, whether they do or neglect to do what you command them; perceiving that it is all one, their Fathers will he froward, hasty, harsh and rigid towards them, when they have many times done their best for them, and they can be no worse (think they) if we do lesser, if we do [Page 44] nothing, yea, if we do contrary to their Command: And this will also undermine Parents honour of recompence from their Children, which remembring Parents harsh carriages towards them, when they were young, may have strong temptations to do the lesse for them in their age, or decaies, when they need their Childrens help. But more of this possibly when we come to particulars.
6. By discords, and uncomfortable breaches, 6. By discord betwixt Parents themselves. hard speeches, cross carriages, and discontents, betwixt Fathers and Mothers; hence, Prov. 19. 13. those two are joyned, A foolish Son is the calamity of his Father, and the contentions of a Wife are a continuall dropping; where there are waearing and wasting contentions, ever and anon, betwixt Wife and Husband, there will be also such a foolish Son, of such a Husband and Wife, who will be a calamity to his Father. Such miscarriage betwixt Father and Mother undermineth your Wisdome, Gravity, and Authority, in your Childrens eyes, who behold the same, and even tempteth them, the more to disrespect you and your Authority.
7. By suffering Children too much to have 7. By leaving their Children to their own wils. their wills, and not seasonably and frequently to break them of their own head-strong wills, and to cross them, in their own wilful desires, or designes, Pro. 29. 15. A Child left (in this sense also) to himself (to have his own will and lust) bringeth his Mother to shame: proveth so stubbon and rude, that he is very a disgrace to her that bare him, who of the two Parents, is the most ready and apt to let her Child have its will too much.
3. This use reproveth such also who either by 3. Reproofe to all Corrupters of Youth. distilling corrupt principles into the younger sort [Page 45] or by any lewd counsells, or the like, do intentionally or actually withdraw Children from due Honour of their Parents; of the former sort are such like as those false teachers among the Jewes, who taught the Sons who had Fathers and Mothers living and needing their help, that yet they needed not to relieve them, or to give ought to them, but instead thereof, either to give somthing to the Corban, or treasury, for temple-uses, and that would exempt them and excuse them from the other work of relieving their Parents: and so teaching them to deny to their Parents the Honour of recompence due to them, they made the 5 th. Commandement, Honour thy Father and Mother, void, and of no force and Authority, or place, as Christ reasoneth, Mark. 7. 9. to 14. There are too many such like corrupters of Children, not aloue amongst Papists, who hold forth the same in substance, which is there instanced in, as might be shewed in their Principles, who would have men give away their whole estates to Religious uses (as they call them) and so dis-enable themselves to relieve their Parents, in what need soever they may stand thereof: they would also have young Men and Women without Parents Consent, to become their Votaries, and when once such, no way to Minister to their Parents any more, though sick, or otherwise needing their Childrens help: but I fear there are too many other petty Antichristian Spirits, in these daies, who by other erronious tenents, wherein they pretend to be for Christ, but are indeed against Christ they leaven their Disciples, and such as they can subtilly draw after them, with a Spirit of Alienation, even from their own good Parents, if they will not be of their corrupt Judgments and opinions; [Page 46] but as those seducers among the Jewes, notwithstanding their goodly pretences to Religion; are branded by Christ to be Hypocrites, according to that of Solomon, Prov. 11. 9. The Hypocrite with his mouth (or the corrupt principles and perswasions uttered by his mouth) destroyeth his Neighbour: And as Christ charged them to be such bold and high-minded sinners, as by those corrupt speeches of theirs, did, what in them lay, make void the Commands of God, so doubtless are such like seducers to be justly charged with the like guilt of prevailing and ruling Hypocrisie, and rebellion against the Lord. And Jesus Christ, who when on earth did doctrinally charge and impeach them in such sort, will assuredly at the last day Judicially sentence men and Angels for the same wickednesse, if they seasonably, seriously, and sincerely repent not of the same. As for others, who by their Counsels as well as scandalous examples, are Corrupters, as of others, so of youth also, and as in other matters, so in this which respecteth the honour which they ow to their Parents, these shew themselves to be the Children of Belial, or of the very Devill, as of one who is amongst all yoaks, in Church, or State, or Familie; they were Children of Belial, in 1 Sam. 10. 26, 27. who despised Saul, that Father of the Common-wealth of Israel: and they are no better, who act or teach contempt of Fathers of Families. As Elies Sons, those ring-leaders in such wayes of dishonour of Fathers of Families, 1 Sam. 2. 25. they are called men of Belial, vers. 12. Such Corruptors of youth, in the matter of Honour due to Parents, be their profession of Religion what it may be, or give they never such good hopes of the truth thereof, as one while Achitophel [Page 47] did, who was Davids equall, all one heart with him (as he thought) his guide, his most intimate acquaintance, one with whome he took sweet Counsell, in sacred, as well as Civill things, and walked to the house of God in Company with him, Psal. 55. 13, 14 Yet if a Counsellour to Absolom, a Son, in way of high dishonour to David, his own Father, as he was in that Counsel he gave Absolom, to defile his Fathers bed, 2 Sam. 17. 20, 21, 22, 23. and to seek his Fathers very life, as well as throne, 2 Sam. 17. 1, 2, 3, 4, 21. I say such a vile Counsellour of Children any way to dishonour their Parents, he is no doubt a desperate Apostate, ripe for the very Imprecation of a godly Parents, as in Davids case, 2 Sam. 15. 31. Lord turn the Counsel of Achitophel into foolishnesse. Such Corrupters of youth also, as well of others, you are surely impenitent, obdurate persons, persons of a seared Conscience, past hope of good, and refuse persons in Gods sight, Jer. 6. 28, 29, 30. They are Brass and Iron, they are all corrupters, the bellowes are burnt, the Led is consumed of the fire, the Founder melteth in vaine, for the wicked are not plucked away; reprobate silver, shall men call them, because the Lord hath rejected them. You are soulmurtherers, Prov. 12. 5, 6. The Counsels of the wicked are deceit: The words of the wicked are to lie in wait for blood: even the very souls of men, Prov. 11. 9. An Hypocrite with his mouth (or with the words, Counsels, and principles uttered by his mouth) destroyeth his Neighbour: even his Neighbours soul also, and shall such bloody and deceitfull men, such crafty soul-murtherers escape? no Assuredly. If sowing discord amongst brethren, be singled out from the rest, as one speciall thing which is an abomination to the Lord, Prov. [Page 48] 6. 16, 19. compared; O how abominable is this unto the Lord, for you, by your vile corrupting speeches, tenents, or Counsels, to lay the seeds of Alienation of Childrens hearts from their own dear Parents. As the City (or civill polity and society) is too oft overthrown, by the mouth (or corrupt speeches, principles, and Counsels uttered by the mouth) of the wicked, Prov. 11. 11. So is the Family also. And shall such enemies to mankind escape unpunished? no assuredly, Prov. 17. 20. He that hath a perverse tongue (to give such like, or any other perverse Counsel) falleth into mischief, Prov. 13. 2. As a man (a good man) shall eat good by the fruit of his mouth (or by the good words, principles, or Counsels, proceeding from his mouth) so (by way of opposition) the soul of the transgressors shall eat violence: they shall be paid in their own coin, and reap the fruit of all the cursed speeches or Counsels which proceeded from their mouths. Prov. 10. 31. The mouth of the just bringeth forth wisdome (namely in those whom they instruct, rebuke, perswade, or Counsel) but the froward tongue (which uttereth naughty counsels and tenents, &c.) shall be cut out. And commonly such bad Counsellours of Sons or Daughters, unto any waies of dishonour to their Parents, they come to dishonourable and vile, if not desperate ends, as did that bad Counsellour, Achitophel, who dyed by a halter, but which was worst of all, he was his own hangman, 2 Sam. 17. 23. And O! that all bad Counsellours of Children against their Parents, might in time take warning by that, and many other dreadfull examples, mentioned in Histories, of the sad ends of such like Counsellours.
A second use of the point may serve for examinaon, [Page 49] whether any have or do rightly Honour their Parents. This is the rather to be considered, in that there is a formall Pharisaicall Honour of Parents: there is an Honour of Parents common not alone to Hypocrites, but to very Pagans also, who from meer naturall principles have done much this way in Honour of Parents, and have been very eminent and famous therein. But to passe them by at present, and instance in others. Paul before his conversion was an exact Moralist, touching the letter of the Law, and so of the 5th Commandement, he was blamelesse, Phil. 3. 6. So that young man, in his sense, had kept all, and o the 5th Commandment, according to the letter of it, Mark 10. 19, 20. Yet a meer unregenerate person.
Now if persons, in the relation of Children rightly honour their Parents, it may be discerned Marks of due honour of Parents. by such markes as these.
1. If Conscience to God, and to his command 1. If from a good conscience. hath the greatest stroak, in the Honour given to Parents, by their Children. If rightly honoured, they are honoured in the Lord, as in that branch of this Honour, it is said, Eph. 6. 1. Children obey your Parents in the Lord. So it is true in Honour in generall, or in any other particular of Honour due to Parents, they must be respected, reverenced, and recompenced, &c. in the Lord. Or so as it be from a good Conscience, and may stand with a good Conscience, 1 Tim. 1. 5. the end (or scope) of the Commandement (even of the whole Law specially that of the second Table, and particularly this of the fifth Commandement also) is Love (to whom Matth. 22. 37, 38, 39, 40. all the duties of the Law are referred as to their head) out of a pure heart, and a good Conscience, and [Page 50] faith unfeighned. True it is, the Law of nature and Nations also, may and must have a strong hand in the Honour of Parents by their Children, but must not have the chief hand therein; respect may and must also be had, to the blessing of life, and that it may be well with us, Eph. 6. 2, 3. Honour thy Father and Mother, that thou maist live long, and that it may be well with thee: We may and must aime at this, that it may be well with us in our souls, bodies, estates, names, occasions, relations, changes, prosperity, adversity, life, death, and after death; but yet conscience to God, and his command, together with chief respect had to the glory of God, must be the great wheel, which carrieth us on in this good way Paul thought to gain eternall life, by his Morall Righteousness, & that set him so hard to this, and other works of the Law, Ph. 3. 6, 7. The yong mans question, intimateth what was uppermost in his heart, in all his keepings of the Law, namely, the getting of eternall life onely, Mark. 10. 17, 19, 20. And therefore these were notright in any of their acts of obedience to this fifth Commandement, or to any of the rest of the ten Commandements.
Now if this Honour to Parents be indeed from a good conscience, it will be also from faith unfeigned: This is discerned if from Faith, for they are joyned, 1 Tim. 1. 5. When the interest which children have in the Lord, and in his gracious covenant and promises, is a main ground of the Honour of Reverence, or of any other Honour, which persons as in the Relation of Children, do give unto their Mother, or to their Father, this is suitable to Gods mind, Levit. 19. 3. Ye shall fear every man his Mother, and every man his Father; why so? or what should move them to that? it followeth: I am the Lord your God. Because [Page 51] they believe him to be their blessed Covenant Father in the Messiah, they are therefore the rather to put all the Honour they can upon the Image of his Father-hood in their Parents. Now it is as God would have it. So when persons as in If from love of God. the relation of Children do respect, prise and love their Christian Parents the more, because they love the Lord, who requireth this at their hand, now it is well a so; or when an holy fear attendeth them, lest not alone their good Parents hearts, If from fear of Sin. but lest the Lord also, and his Spirit, should any way be grieved, or displeased by their expressing, or carrying it towards them in any way contrary to due Honour of Parents; they are afraid to carry it irreverently, disobediently, disrespectfully, or ingratefully towards them, even when some way tempted thereto, lest the eyes of Gods glory should thereby be provoked, now also it is well. Or when at any time they espie any dishonourable If kindly broken and Abased when the contrary in them is discerned. thought, or stirring in their minds, or spirits, or take notice of some speech, or carriage of theirs, savouring of dishonour to Father, or Mother, and this melteth their hearts kindly before the Lord, and maketh them ready to confess the same ingenuously to living Parents, as well as to the Lord, and that in all the aggravations thereof; yea when a very shadow of such dishonour of Parents, or the remembrance of any passages savouring thereof, though past long ago, and possibly before God touched their hearts effectually, as well as since that, these also are matters of heart Abasings, breakings, and bitter complaints before the Lord: this argueth a good conscience in this particular also. When they also do watch their spirits and hearts, to keep them to the Rule, as well as over If watching over their spirits also so that end. their speeches, gestures, and actions, to keep them [Page 52] as close as may be to that rule, Honour thy Father and thy Mother: this also argueth Honour of Father If there be no outward thing frighting or chiefly drawing to it. and Mother from a good conscience. In a word, when there is no other thing of an inferiour nature, either to affright and force them to it, or on the other hand, to bribe them to it (as say riches, preferments, patrimony, or the like humane Attractives) and yet they are inwardly moved, and strongly, and prevailingly carryed out, in a way of Honour of Parents: All these do undoubtedly evince, that now at least there is a blessed Spirit, and habit of Honour of Parents wrought in such Children by the speciall efficacy of the Holy Ghost, from which such do now at least Act, in matters respecting their Parents Honour, and that now at least, a good conscience, and conscience to God and to his Command, doth set them about this blessed work.
The clearing of this first mark, which indeed is the main of all, might satisfie us, but for further help in this discovery, let us adde three or four marks of Honour rightly given to Parents.
A second mark then hereof is, when Children 2. If holding up Parents Honour when aged, and decayed. are conscientiously carefull to hold up Parents Honour, when they are Aged, yea, and when through infirmity, Parents some way miscary. As Sem and Japhet were cordially sollicitous to hold up their Aged and miscarrying Father Noahs Honour; yea though tempted by their brother Chams derisive tale about their Father, to have disrespected him: yet see their conscientious care of maintaining their respect, and reverence to their Father, in avoyding any occasion (as sight of his nakedness) which might have drawn on contempt of him, in them, Gen. 9. 22. And Ham, the Father [Page 53] of Canaan, saw his Fathers nakedness, and told his two brethren without, vers. 23. And Shem, and Japhet took a garment, and laid it upon their shoulders, and went backwards, and covered the nakedness of their Father, and their faces were backward, and they saw not their Fathers nakedness.
3. When good Children do even thirst after 3. If Children thirst after Parents souls welfare. their carnall Parents souls welfare and peace, above others, and are ever and anon contriving which way to help on that also. Thus did Abraham, what in him lay, to help out his Idolatrous Father Terah, from his course and way: as might be shewed by comparing Acts 7. 3, 4. with Gen. 11. end, and 12. 1. and John 24. 2, 3.
4. When they are as willing and joyfull to Honour 4. If as willing to Honour them as to be Honoured, or rewarded by others. Parents, all the just wayes of Honour of them, as they are to partake of any benefit of their parentall respects or bounty, as they are to have it be well with them here or hereafter, as they are to live long upon the earth, or as they are to have the like due honor put upon them by children, wch they already have, or may come to have themselvs.
5. When they do not so soon forget their Parents after they are dead and gone. Sarah was 90. years old, when she bare Isaac, Gen. 17. 17. And lived 37. years after. For she died when she was 127. years old, Gen. 23. 1. then Isaac was 37. years old: he was 40. years old, when he maried Rebeckah, Gen. 25. 20. Which was three years after his Mothers death: and when he married, or took Rebeckah to wife, then it was that Isaac was comforted after his Mothers death, Gen. 24. 67. For three years space then, this pious Son was ever and anon mourning in thoughts of his good Mothers death, and God made this his sweet companion [Page 54] Rebeckah, a speciall comfort to him against that trouble about his Mothers death.
A third use is of exhortation: and that, to Parents, 3. Use. Of exhortation, 1. To Parents to further this their due Honour. 1. By preventing their being either corrupted, or dismayed in matters of Religion. to indeavour what in you lieth, to help forward your Children, in their Conscionable performance of this their duty of Honour of Parents; and for this end,
1. Take very speciall care, to prevent whatsoever, either may corrupt them, or any wayes discourage them in the matter of the Honour of God himself, or of his word. For if they grosly fail in the matter of the Honour of God & of his word, they will as grosly fail in the matter of Honour of Parents; As we see in Elies Sons, who were vilely corrupt in the matters of Religion, as those of common honesty, 1 Sam. 2. 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 22. and vers. 25. they were as vile transgressours against the fifth Commandement, requiring Honour to Parents: they hearkened not to the voice of their Father. Imitable therefore is that care of the Godly Fathers of the two Tribes and half, to remove occasions of discouraging their Children, from the fear or worship of God, Josh. 22. 25, 26, 27, 28. And if we have not rather done it (built this Altar of witness) saying, in time to come, your children (say they to the Fathers of the ten Tribes there met) may say to our Children, what have you to do with the God of Israel? ye have no part in the Lord: so shall your Children make our Children cease (or be discouraged and Apostatise) from fearing (or worshiping) the Lord. Oh! that Christian Parents would the rather keep out Anabaptistical principles and doctrines, as from their own hearts, so as much as may be from the eares and minds of their Children, lest being told thereby, that they [Page 55] have nothing to do with the God of Israel, and they have no part in the Lord; they are made thereby to cease, or be discouraged, from the fear, or worship of the Lord; but that by the way.
2. Redress what in you lyeth, (if you did not 2. By redressing disorders in them one towards another prevent) disorderly carriages of your Children towards one another; for if they are inured to carry it badly one toward another they will also carry it dishonourably towards Parents, Gen. 37. 23, 24. Jacobs Sons, who, before their conversion, carried it so unworthily towards Joseph, they carried it as malepertly towards their Father, Gen. 34. When vers. 30. their sorrowfull Father had expressed his fears of the ruine of him and of his house, which might be occasioned by his Sons Murther of the Shechemites, they saucily answer vers. 31. Should he deal with our Sister as with an Harlot? Absolom that will carry it so cruelly and perfidiously towards his brother Amnon, 2 Sam. 13. 28, 29. He proved as very a perfidious and cruel wretch towards his own Father not many years after. Cap. 15. Rebeckah's care therefore was imitable, to prevent, or remove the continuall discords, and jarrs, and mischiefs, which might arise from that heart-grudge between Esau and Jacob, which because she could not heal, she sends away Jacob from Esaus company, Gen. 27. 42, 43, 44, 45.
3. Labour to be fearers and honourers of God your selves, as an heavenly Father, and then you 3. By being fearers of God themselves. have the advantages of the promises of God, that your Children shall be blessed also, and consequently furnished with this spirituall blessing, a spirit of Honour of Parents, Psal. 112. 2. The generation of the upright shall be blessed, that they shall be a comfort to you, as Vine-branches issuing from the wombs of your wives, yielding in time [Page 56] grapes of Consolation to Parents, in the wayes of due honour to God, or Parents, &c. Psal. 128. 1. Blessed is every one that feareth God, &c. And vers. 2. happy shalt thou be, and it shall be well with thee. And vers. 3. Thy wife shall be as a fruitfull Vine by the sides of thine house, thy Children as Olive-plants round about thy Table: which is not barely a promise, that their wives shall have Children, or many Children, as if that made them so peculiarly, happy as is promised they should be: for ungodly persons are full of Children, Ps. 17. 14. They send forth their Children like a flock, Job 21. 11. No, but its a promise of making the fearer of God happy in the qualification of his Children, that they shall be, such as shall yield wine of consolation to them, in what they shall be to God, and to their Parents, and to others: as the Vine-branches do yeeld the grapes, which yeeld the chearing wine to mans heart: and that they shall be such, as shall be an honour to their Parents, by their manner of walking towards God, Parents and others, as Olive-plants yeeld that oyle of Olive, which maketh mans face to shine. I forbear to instance in other promises.
4. Pray much and plead earnestly with God 4. By praying and pleading with God much for Children. for your Children, that God would write his Law (and so the Law of the fifth Commandement also) in their hearts: ingrave the Law of grace in them, to dispose and inable them to obedience to all his Commandements.
5. Act your faith upon the promises of God, 5. By acting faith in Gods promises for Children. undertaking for your Childrens best welfare, as Esay 61. 9, and 65. 23. Gen. 17. 7. Acts 2. 38, 39. Esay 59. ult. cap. 44. 3, 4. Which as they are made to the whole Church, as an homogeneall whole, so to each part of which that whole consisteth. If the [Page 57] woman of Canaan can believe. And for her daughter, she may have not only that mercy of disposessing the devill, but what she will for her, Matth. 15. 28. Oh woman, great is thy faith: be it to thee as thou wilt. If that man in Mark. 9. 21, 22, 23, 24. Can believe that Christ can help his Son, at that or any other dead lift, all things are possible to him that believeth: even to a Parent believing for his Child. Eveu that could believe for her very babe, whom out of faith she called Seth: for God said she, hath appointed me another seed, (or good and godly Child) instead of Abel, whom Cain slew: she faled not of what she believed for him: for he proved a most worthy man to God and man-ward. So did Noah prove, of whom his father, when born, could believe, & therfore in faith called him Noah, saying, this Son shall comfort us, concerning our work and toyl of our hands, &c. Gen. 5. 29. So did Moses prove a man eminent, not alone for honour of God, but for honour of Parents, witness those Acts of Honour to his very Father in Law Jethro, mentioned Exod. 4. 8. and cap. 18. 7. and Numb. 10. 31, 32, 33. Concerning wch Moses, when he was a very babe, his own Parents acted their faith, and from that faith used that means to become an instrument of speciall honour, Heb. 11. 23. They in Psal. 102. That believed for their Children, that their Children should continue, vers. 28. The Children of thy servants shall continue, must needs believe for their help and grace to obey the fifth Commandement, which is made by God himself a very speciall means of continuing and living long in the Land, which the Lord thy God shall give them. 6. By good education of Children.
6. Bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, hence those two joyned, Eph. 6. 1, [Page 58] 2, 3. Children are charged with this: Honour thy Father and thy Mother: Parents with their duty, in lieu thereof, and as a means to further it, vers. 4. Likewise ye Parents provoke not your Children to wrath, and that way hinder your children in it, but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, and that way further your Children in it. Isaac that was so well educated by his Father, in what a high degree doth he honour his Father, with this Honour of obedience, when at his Command, though being in the flowre of his youth, about 30. years old, he could easily have escaped his old Fathers hand, yet is content to let him bind him to be offered up as a sacrifice unto God? Gen. 22. 9. So Noah's, Shem, and Japhet, whom he had educated well (though Cham proved a wretch, yet) they proved eminent examples of Honour of Parents, witness their act formerly mentioned, Gen. 9. 23, 24. So Solomon who was so well educated, and instructed, both by his Father David: witness the Records which he kept of the principle things his Father instructed him in, mentioned, Prov. 4. 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13. and of his Mother Bathsheba, witness his Records of some speciall, Patheticall Counsels of her to him, mentioned Prov. 31. 1. to 10. How eminent he proved in this way of Honour of Parents, let that act of his towards his Mother, mentioned, 1 Kings 2. 19. declare, though a King upon his throne, yet the King rose up to meet her, and bowed himself to her, &c. the like might be said of Jacob's Joseph so well educated by his Father, witness the earliness of grace in him, Gen. 37. 1, 2, 3, 4, &c. How eminent he was in this way of Honour of Parents, his story shewes, Gen. 47. 12. be nourished his father, &c. And cap. 48. 12. and [Page 59] Joseph bowed himself (viz. to his Father) with his face toward the earth. But concerning Parents education of Children, we shall speak largely to it God willing afterward.
7. It is good also, that as Manoah in that case 7. By advising with best Ministers what is best for that end. inquired of the Angel concerning their Son Sampson Judg. 13. 8, 12. How they should order the Child, and how they should do to live, so let Christian Parents be taking the best advise, and help they can, of their able and faithfull Ministers, how they should order their Children, as may be for the best, every way for Gods glory, and their Honour 2. Use, Exhortation, To Children 2. To Children to give Parents such due Honour. Motives to it. to endeavour to give this Honour in general due by the Command of God from you to your Parents; for which consider, 1. Of some Motives to it, And 2. Of some helps and means to this duty; only remember I speak to the Children of the Godly, to the Children of the Church, though not altogether excluding others. Motives to this duty are such as these.
1. In that God hath placed the image of his father 1. Gods image in Parents. hood upon parents, therfore honour them: he that honoreth God, wil honor an especial Image of any divine excellency of his, the father-hood of God is a choice, relative, divine excellency of his, witness that name of honor, not alone respecting us his adopted Children, yea, his begotten ones by grace, but respecting his only beloved Son, & only begotten by nature, let this Image hereof in the parents of our Persons be the rather venerable and honourable in our eyes. Hence that Argument of God, Mal. 1. 6. A Son Honoureth his Father; If I be a Father, where is my Honour? my Fatherly Image is Honoured by a Son in his Father, and will not you, who are in a sense, my Sons, Honour [Page 60] my own father-hood, whereof that in others is but 2. Childrens Covenant-interest by their good Parents. an Image.
2. In that God taketh Children into his Covenant, even from the respect he hath to their Godly Parents; & if God honor parentall relations so much in his way, will not you honor them in your way, Deu. 4. 2. Because he loved thy Fathers, therefore he chose their seed after them, to one and the same persons belong the glory and the Covenants, Ro. 9. 4. to whom belong the glory, & the covenants: if Gods & the Churches covenant be long to Children, the glory belongs to them, take away Covenant & church privileges, ye take away their glory, as the Israelites did, when they would have dealt with the little ones of Judah, as if they had rather been Pagans and out-Lawes, than fellow-brethren in covenant-respects; so they purposed to have kept sons & their daughters under, as bond-men & women, 2 Chro. 28. 8, 9, 10. They might only have of the heathen for bond-men and women, Le. 25. 44. but not any of their brethren the Children of Israel, they might not rule over them with rigour, as over bond men and women, v. 46. though waxen poor they must not be compelled to serve as bondservants, ver. 39. Yea, but for Israelites to take that course they intended, was to make them as the heathen, and so to take away their glory of Covenant and Church-privileges, as Junius expounds that, Mi. 2. 9. Of late my people are risen up as an enemy, &c. and from their children have ye taken away my glory for ever: he referreth it in this way to that story, 2 Chro. 28. 8, 9, 10. Now if by good Parents Children come to shame in such Honour and 3. Childrens lifts to their faith by means of good Parents. glory, they may well in way of gratefull retribution Honour their good Fathers and Mothers.
3. In that Children have a mighty lift to their [Page 61] very faith, in what ever concerneth their welfare, outward, or inward, and that in all cases and charges, from the covenant of God with their Parents, therefore honor your Christian Parents: hence, Exod. 32. 13, 14. In that almost desperate case of Israel, Moses exerciseth his faith, and thence pleadeth the Covenant with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, remember saith he, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, &c. Mic. 7. 20. The Prophet setteth his faith on work for himself and people upon that Covenant, Thou wilt (saith he) perform the truth to Jacob, and the mercy to Abraham, which thou hast sworn to our Fathers from the dayes of old; and this his faith therein was the ground of that which he believed, vers. 29. He will turn again, he will have compassion upon us, he will subdue our iniquities, and thou wilt cast their sins into the depths of the Sea, 2 Chro. 33. 12, 13. Manasseth that notorious miscreant, When in his affliction he besought the Lord his God (viz. His God in the Covenant of his Father Hezekiah) And humbled himself greatly before the God of his Fathers, And prayed to live, and he was intreated of him, he then prayed in faith, for hee prevailed with God, but here was his hold and prop, God was his God in the Covenant of his Father and Ancestors, and therefore he will wrestle strongly with him for mercy, even to surh a notorious sinner, as he now seeth and feeleth himself to be. Solomon's hold and bottome of his prayer in his case, is this, Let thy promise unto David, my Father, be established, &c. 2 Chro. 1. 9, 10, 11. So Kings 8. 25, 26. And now Oh Lord God of Israel, let thy word I pray thee be verified which thou spakest to thy servant David my Father. David twise pleads his Mothers interest in God, Psal. 86. 16. Save the Son of thy [Page 62] handmaid, Psal. 116. 16. Truly Lord, I am thy servant, and the Son of thy hand-maid, thou hast loosed my bonds, Prov. 14. 26. In the fear of the Lord is strong confidence, and his Children (viz.) The Children of him that feareth God, shall have place and refuge: No case so sad, or so bad, which such Children of fearers of God, whose eyes and hearts God openeth in some measure to see, and be sensible thereof, but they have an asylum to fly too, they have the Covenant and promises made, and ratified in Christ, to their Godly Fathers and Mothers, to repair too, and to keep up their faith at the deadest lift, lift up Parents then high, in Honor by whose Covenant-interest your faith may in saddest cases have such lifts.
4. In that Children are many waies blessed and bettered by occasion of their Parents 4. Blessings of Children by good Parents. prayers, pleas, Covenant-interests, &c. therefore Honour them, Gen. 49. 26. The blessings of thy Father have prevailed above the blessings of my progenitors. Every godly Ancestour addeth something to the Common stock of blessings of grace, laid up for their posterity, the latter still superadding somewhat more than the former left, Psal. 115. 14. The Lord shall increase you more and more, you & your Children; Psal. 102. 1, 2, 3. The generation of the upright shall be blessed; Psal. 103. 17. Gods righteousnesse (or faithfulness in his Covenanted mercies) is unto Childrens Children. Deut. 4. 40. Thou shalt therefore keep his Statutes, that it may go well with thee, and with thy Children after thee: So cap. 12. 28. If God then Honour you with such blessings for your good Parents sakes, you may well Honour your Parents, yea, sometimes the very worst Children, who had been many a time debased as low as hell, by the destroying judgements [Page 63] of God, yet are not, out of Gods respect to their Parents, or Ancestors, Covenant-interests: God would not destroy the house of David, in wicked Jehoram's time, because of the Covenant which he had made with David, 2 Chro. 21. 6, 7. And so the very worst might be provoked to Honour their good Parents, for had it not been for their sakes, its likely such had been in the lowest hell ere this; let children of good parents know that by grace through your Parents instrumentally, you have God for your God, if not rejecting your interest, if having hearts to improve the same for your help, to Honour God and them, Gen. 17. 7.
5. In that it is the ready way for Children to be Honoured by others, to Honour their Parents; 5. Childrens honour from others thereby and therefore Honour them. Ruth 4. 14, 15. The good woemen say of Obed Ruth's Son, that his name shall be famous in Israel, and adde that as an incouraging Argument to Naomi his Grand-Mother, and he shall be unto thee a restorer of thy life, and a nourisher of thine old age, a very observant and gratefull Grand-childe, and no wonder then if his name would be so Honourable in Israel. God records it in Scripture in honorem, in the eyes of God, Angels, and men, concerning Sem, Japhet, Joseph and others, that they were such Honourers of Parents. The very Pagan Grecians honoured Aeneas his piety, to his aged Father, so as that they honourably rewarded it with the gift of all his other estate, which else was the Conquerers right.
6. In that it is the ready way for Children to be 6. Blessings upon posterity thereby. blessed in their Children and posterity: as Shem was thereby in his posterity, and Japhet in his, Gen. 9. 23, 26, 27. Yea, its the way to have like [Page 64] Honour meted out to you from your Children, therefore the rather Honour Parents. Do to them as you would have others in like relation to do to you, Matth. 7. 11.
2. Consider of some helps and means to this Helps to it. Avoid Causes of dishonour to Parents, as, 1. Self-conceit. duty.
1. Take heed of all and every of the causes of Childrens dishonour of their Parents: As 1. Self-conceitedness, as in Absolom, who thought himself fitter to rule then his Father, 2 Sam. 15. 3, 4. there is none deputed of the King to hear thee, Oh that I were Judge, I would do every man justice; hence that state of high dishonour to his Father, and treachery against him, 2 Sam. 15. 7. to 12. Like the yonger Son in the Parable, Luke. 15. 12, 13. Who thought himself fitter to manage his Portion then his Father, and thence slighteth and so leaveth his Father's watch, guidance and presence.
2. Over-weaned conceits of what you do for 2. Conceit of what Children do for Parents. Parents, when indeed you can never do enough for them, who under God gave you your being, like the Elder son in the Parable, Luk. 15. 28, 29. Who is ready to talk great things to his Father of his serviceableness to his Father, so that when his Father intreated him, who might have commanded him to come in, he slights his Father's intreaties, he is angry with his Father, findeth fault with his Fathers kindness to his prodigall Brother, whereas he that had deserved more kindness from his Father, never had the like from him, for so he answers his Father, Loe these many years do I serve thee, neither at any time transgressed I thy Commandement, and yet thou never gavest me a kid, but as soon as this thy Son is come, which hath devoured thy living with harlots, thou bast killed for [Page 65] him the fatted Calf: and it is to be feared to be the case of too many Children in N. E. where Parents are put hard to it, to make more use of their Children, for their work and business, that they poring too much upon what they do for their Parents, and not seriously weighing what their Parents have done for them, they slight them in their hearts.
3. Curiosity and an inordinate desire of liberty. 3. Curiosity. The young man, Eccles. 11. 9. He must needs walk in the wayes of his own heart, and sight of his eyes, and so careth not for Honouring God or man. Like the Prodigall Son in the Parable, he must needs abroad to see fashions? what should such a spark as he do alwayes at home, to be there held in as he is? he would rather be at liberty, and therefore, let his Father do as he will, he broad from him.
4. A discontented spirit, a spirit of unsettledness, 4. Discontent. which sometimes, is the very blast of God upon young men for some other foul sin: as that wandering spirit was upon Cain for his, but then Cain must away from home, from his parents, though thereby he goeth from the presence of God: like the Prodigall Son in the Parable, not content with his Fathers finding, but he will be for himself; though after some bought experience of his, he afterward finds that the meanest case and place of the lowest in his Fathers house, be far better then his.
5. Ambition and eager desire of man in outward 5. Ambition; respects then is meet for you; this also maketh many slight their Parents, & seek to shake off their Parentall watch and rule. This made Absolom turn a vile traytor to his Father, 2 Sam. 15. and this also put on Adonijah very far that way, 1 Kings 1. 5, 6.
[Page 66] 6. Envy at just respects shew'd by Parents, to 6. Envy. fellow Brethren or Sisters, like the elder Son in the parable, out of envy of his Fathers kindnesse to his younger Brother: this maketh him fly out so unreverently against his Father, and to charge him closely with injustice and partiality, Luke 15. 28, 29. Thus Jacobs Sons, envying that their Father respects young Joseph so much, they are resolv'd to make some hand of him, though they know thereby they shall rob their Father of a great part of his comfort, if not undermine his life; they regard neither, & so their Father is set light by that while.
2. Take heed of bad company and counsell, 2. Avoyd bad company. which is apt to mislead you, even to dishonour your Parents. When Solomon, Prov. 19. 26. had told his Son the sad doom, of a Son that wasteth his Father, and chaseth away his Mother, he then giveth his Son this counsell, as an Antidote against any such like sin, vers. 27. Cease my Son to hear the instruction that causeth to erre from the words of knowledge: hence is it, that the boon companion, who is a glutton and a drunkard, is also wont to be so stubborn, as not to hear the voyce of his Parents, Deut. 21. 20. Such as contrary to that advice, Psal. 1. 1. Do walk in the counsell of the ungodly, and stand in the way sinners, they came to sit also in the seat of the scornfull, to scorn at any, none excepted, no not Parents themselves, Prov. 30. 17. there is an eye that mocketh at his very Father, & despiseth to obey his Mother; better therefore were it for younger persons to company and counsell with wise youth, who conscienciously Honour their Parents, and that will be verified, Prov. 13. 20. That he that walketh with the wise, shall be wise, when as a companion of fools shall be destroyed.
[Page 67] 3. Take heed of poring upon any failings in Parents, 3. Avoyd poring upon Parents failings. which may tempt you to slight your Parents. Children in such cases, must be as not seeing the failings, they do see in Parents carriages sometimes, and as not hearing their failings in expressions sometimes which they do hear: ingenious Shem and Japhet will not see their Fathers nakedness, Gen. 9. 23, 24. And so continue to Honour their Father Noah, wheras Cham that will needs look so wistly, and take such notice of his Fathers nakedness, commeth to despise him, and deride him. Let Children remember that God the Lawmaker, and the fifth Commandement, their Law and Rule they must walk by, is without spot or failing, and therefore They must Honour Father and Mother.
4. Listen not to unworthy reports or whispers, 4. Listen not to whisperers. which ungratious persons, set on work by Belial, may suggest to you, any away, against your Parents; Shem and Japhet would not listen to their Brother's tale in that vile way he told it, but if ought be a miss, to provoke them to slight their Father, they will cover it rather: when one told Teleuchus how ill his Father spake of him, saith Teleuchus, if my Father hath spoken so bad of me, Plutarch surely he knoweth cause enough to do so, else he would not have done it; an imitable example of an heathen, but ingenious Child to his Father.
5. Improve choycer seasons of getting good, 5. Improve seasons of soul-good. that you may come to be true Honourers of God, and then no doubt but you will be Honourers of Parents: make God only to be your God first, worship him aright, and sanctifie his name, &c. and then you will Honour Father and Mother, Levit. [...]9. 2. Be ye holy, saith God, as I am holy, and then [Page 68] vers. 3. chargeth, fear yea every man his Father and his Mother, be pious to God-wards, and you will be pious towards Parents, the fear of God is the beginning of such wisdome also, Prov. 10. 5. As he that sleepeth in harvest, (the season of reaping good, soul-good also) is a Son that causeth shame (to Parents also) so by rule of opposition, he that gathereth in summer is a wise Son, or one that will cause Honour to Parents, as well as himself or others.
6. Set often before your eyes, studdy much, and 6. Eye good examples this way. make utmost improvement of choycer Scripture examples, of persons eminen t for honor of parents, as that of Shem, Abraham, Isaack, Jacob, Joseph, yea, Jesse himself, Luke 2. 51.
7. Inure your selves betimes to Honour Fathers and Mothers without Authority; as Aged persons, 7. Honour aged persons. Levit. 19. 32. Honour the face of the Old man. Teleuchus being asked, why at Sparte the younger Plut arch. sort use to rise up before the aged? answered, that by giving Honour to others, they might learn to Honour their own Parents.
CHAP. III. Of Honour in speciall due to Parents, and that in a direct way, and therein of Honour of respect and love due to Parents.
HAving spoken of Honour in generall, required by the 5. Commandement, from Children to Parents, we come now to speak of Honour in speciall due to them: & first of that which is in a [Page 69] direct way: and therein according to the Method propounded in the first Chapter. 1. Of Honour of respect and love due to Parents; that Honour is so taken in Scripture we there gave Scripture instances, That honour of respect to Parents is due, proved. and need not now repeat them: we may then note as a branch of the general point, That Children are bound to Honour their Parents, with the Honour of choycest respect and love. Honour thy Father and Mother, saith Exod. 20. 12. But having them in choycest respect and love is Honouring of them, say other Scriptures, therfore Children must most highly respect and love their Parents. For our better handling of this branch of Honour, let us only shew wherein this commanded respect and love to Parents doth consist, or what is required of Children in this, that they are required so highly to respect and love their Parents, and then afterwards apply it by way of use.
To the former we answer, that Children,
1. They are to be delighted greatly in their This respect consisteth 1. In delighting Parents. Fathers presence, to be much affected with the very sight of a Father or Mother. See how Joseph plotteth to have his Father near him, when he could not be so near his Father, Gen. 45. 10. Thou shalt be near to me, &c. And when he commeth to the sight of his Father, after some years inforced absence of his from his Father, he's even overjoy'd (as we say) to see him: He is as one transported, for he falleth on his Fathers neck, having first humbly presented himself to him, Gen. 46. 29. And he wept (for very extasie of joy) on his neck a good while; his heart was so overcome with strength of affections, that for a good space he can silently weep, but not utter a word, that we read of till afterwards: till his good old Father [Page 70] first brake that deep silence, vers. 30. and then Joseph also speaketh, vers. 31. As Children are to their Parents, the desire of their eyes, and that whereupon they set their minds, their Sons and their Daughters, Ezek. 24. 25. So should Parents be to Children. Jacob had enough if his Son Joseph be alive and well, he is content to die if God so pleased, Gen. 46. 30. Let the sight of absent, long absent Parents, be to Children, even as dear and precious, and delighting, as their very lives, if not more: as it is in that precedentall love and respect of the genuine Children of the Father of Spirits; Oh the sight of his face, the injoyment of his presence, especially after some space of the want of his blessed presence, what is it not to such Childrens hearts? Such for the nature at least of our respect and love, should be Childrens love to their Parents.
2. They are not forward to part with 2. Backwardnesse to pa [...] w [...]h them. their Parents, but as urged & in a sort forced by any speciall call or providence of God; and if sometimes called, to be absent from them for a time, yet to be longing (in a moderate and regular way) after their Company againe. Both these paticulars are clear in instances, the former in Ruth, when her Sister Orpha left her Mother with tears in her eyes, (Ruth 1. 14. And they lift up their voice and wept again, and Orpha kissed her Mother in Law, but) Ruth clave to her, yea, when urged by Naomi to return after her Sister-in-Law, vers. 15. Yet saith she, vers. 19. Intreat me not to leave thee, for whither thou goest I will go, and where thou lodged I will lodge: She will share with her in wealth and woe, and nothing but death shall part them, vers. 17. 2 King. 19. 20. Elisha must needs go and kiss his Father and Mother, and [Page 71] then he will foolow Elijah: God will have the poore captive Woman, when her Master liketh her for his Wife, yet to bewaile her Father and Mother for a Moneth, Deut. 21. 13. Such loathness God will have Children to express to part with dear Parents, as Parents are wonderous loath to part with their Children, living or dying, unless urged by Gods Call: like good old Jacob first, Gen. 42. 38. My Son (saith he of Benjamin) shall not go down with you, for his Brother is dead, and he is left alone, if mischief befall him by the way ye go, then shall ye bring down my gray haires with sorrow to the grave, and Cap. 43. 22, &c. And their Father Israel said, if it must needs be so, then do this, &c. So should Children not part with their Parents, till they must needs, till God some way calleth them from them: as the genuine Children of God, such is their love to him, that it is as death to part with him, though but for a time; Oh if it might be their Fathers pleasure, they would never be from him, nor have him from them. So in the nature of our love to Parents, should it be expressed to them; if God should take them away from us, yet our love should be expressed in our greatest trouble and grief for them, as Isaacks was to his Mother, for three years space after, as was shewed from Gen. 24. 63. compared with other Scriptures. When David would express his great grief for his very afflicted enemies, as if his friends or Brethren, I bowed down heavily (saith he) as one that mourneth for his Mother, a Mother-Iess Childs mourning then, for a deceased Mother, is the saddest of mournings; Hence it was of old a good Neighbourly Custome, to give a consolatory Cup, to such as mourned for Father or Mother, as such whose grief was deemed [Page 72] so great, that they needed some cheering; hence the contrary threatned in judgment, Jer. 16. 7. Edward the first, having his Father Henry the 3. newly deceased, and withall one young Prince, his own Son, dead also, he made light of his Sons death in comparison of his Fathers, saying, He might come to have more Sons, but he should never have any more Fathers, now this was gon. As for the other expression of Childrens love to Parents, in longing after them, we see it in Jacob, witness that part of his plea, Gen. 28. 21. So that I come again to my Fathers house in peace, and Gen 31. 30. Laban took notice that Jacob longed sore after his Fathers house; as in that pattern of love of Gods Children, they shew in longing sore after him, and of their Communion with him, Psal. 42. 1, 2, 3. and 62. 1, 2, 3, &c. So it is in Childrens love to their Parents: only, this longing after them, must not exceed the bounds of particular calls and callings or relations, as of Husbands, Wifes, Servants, Ministers, Magistrates, &c. But in such a way and season, as it may not break any other bonds of God.
3. Children are many waies to deny themselves, 3. In denying themselves for them for their Parents choise good, any way, as when Children in their Parents wants or weaknesses, are called to be staies to their Parents, allbeit it might be more to their outward advantage to be else where, yet they must be willing to suffer and lose somewhat with them, and for them, rather then forsake them in such a case: as Ruth seeing her aged Mother-in-law, who had been full of outward blessings, but now is empty and very poor, she will not leave her though a younger Woman and likely to do better for the outward man other where, Ruth. 1. 16, &c. she will work [Page 73] hard for her, stoop low to become a poor gleaner, to bring in supplies to her Mother-in-law, Cap. 2. and how long did Jacobs Sons imploy themselves, in the Managing their Fathers estate and outward affaires & supplies? not alone before their Marriage, Gen. 30. 35. but after, witness that Gen. 37. 12, 14 & 42. 1, 2, 3. & 43. 15. and 47. 1, 2, 3, &c. Yea, Children are to be willing to run very great hazards or hardships, for their Parents sakes, rather then to indanger them, in their persons and names, or the like. Notable is that example of good Judah, Gen. 44. 33, 34. having said, v. 30. That his Fathers life was bound up in the Lads life, so that as v. 31. If he see not him return, he will die, and so they shal bring their Fathers gray haires with sorrow to the grave; now therefore, saith Judah, let thy Servant abide instead of the Lad, bond-man to my Lord, and let the Lad go up with his Brethren, for how shall I go up to my Father, and the Lad be not with me? lest paradventure, I see the evill that shall come to my Father; Judah had rather live and die a bond-man, if thereby he might lengthen out his Fathers daies, by Benjamins return, or prevent his sorrowfull end, by the detaining Benjamin in Egypt. Memorable is that story recorded by Pausanias l. 10. writing of the Catanensiaus, saith, that when Catana, a City bordering upon Aetna, was set on fire by it, they made nothing of their Silver or Gold, but as they fled out, one taketh up his Mother upon his shoulders, another his Father, but because they hasted not, being so loaden, the fire compassed them, the flame suddenly passing on, yet would they not lay down their Parents, wherefore they report, that the flames parted as in two, and passed over both the young men and their Parents, without mortall [Page 75] hurt of them, whence in his time, honourable memorials were assigned by them to the Catanenses: God honoured those acts of high respect to Parents, with a notable deliverance, and men honoured them with honourable monuments thereof. And indeed, what did not the pattern of filial respect to his Father, the Son of God, hazard and undergo for his Fathers sake and honour? and what will not any genuine Child of his, by his help under go, rather then hazard his name or cause, and there is a proportion of the like, in the Children of mens love to their Parents. Parents many waies denyed and hazarded themselves for Children, and they may well do as much for Parents.
4. They are to be exceedingly affected with 4. In being affected with Parents favour or frownes. their Parents true love to them, or grounded and just displeasure against them, in the speaking expressions of either of them: Solomon kept the Records thereof, in his case, as that he took speciall notice of, and was much affected with, and God himself took it so well, that he ordereth it to be a piece of Sacred Writ, Prov. 4. 3. I was (saith he) my Fathers Son, tender, and only beloved in the sight of my Mother: When Ruben saw that Joseph was missing, in fear of his Father distast thereof, saith, Gen. 37. 30. The Child is not; and I, whither shall I go? Absolom would be feigning a genuine filiall respect to his Father, in this particular, that his Fathers favour is all in all to him as a Son, and his life doth him no good, whilest under his displeasure, 2 Sam. 14. 32. He would have Joab say on his behalf to the King his Father, wherefore am I come up from Geshur? now therefore let me see the Kings face, and if there be any iniquity in me, let him kill me: but he was a [Page 76] very Counterfeit in this: God himself alludeth to the case of the displeased Father, in Miriams case, Numb. 12. 14. If her Father (saith he) had spit in her face, should she not be ashamed seaven daies? look as it was in Christs deep affections, to the expressions of his Fathers love or anger; or as it is with Gods other Children, that nothing more affects them, then the sense of their Fathers love one way, or that of his displeasure the other way; So it is with ingenuous Children, in a like respect of affectionatnesse with Parentall favour or anger.
5. They are to prize very much Parents good 5 In prizing Parents instructions and reproofs. and savoury Counsels and instructions, yea, their very rebukes: Carefully remembring and recording their most usefull sayings. Thus Solomon taketh this as Davids charge to him, Prov. 4. 4. Let thine heart retain my words: and the choicer passages thereof he records vers. 5. such as those, get Wisdome, get Ʋnderstanding, and other like golden Counsels, vers. 6, 7, 8, &c. He giveth the like in charge to his Son, vers. 21. My Son, attend unto my words, keep them in the midst of thine heart. See the like Prov. 3. 1. and 2. 1. and 6. 21. Cap. 7. 1, 2, 3. Herein Gods Childrens honour of respect and love to their heavenly Father is expressed, that they make so much of his words, and keep them as their treasure: It is the like in the case of the Children of men towards their Parents.
6. They are to prize and cleave to their good 6. In prizing Parents friends and Children. Parents speciall friends, Prov. 27. 10. Thy Fathers friend forsake not: but especially they are to cleave to Brethren and Sisters of the same Parents, 1 Pet. 3, 8. Love as Brethren (saith he in Saints cases) but it is borrowed from that which is naturall to [Page 76] Brethren of the same Parents, which is to love each other dearly, its else a dishonour to the Image of their Parents, which is as one Common stamp upon them all, so that if they love the one, they must love the other, whence also that, by the same allusion, when speaking of love to Gods Children, 1 Joh. 5. 1. And every one that loveth him that begat, loveth him also that is begotten, he that loveth the Father begetting, will love his Image in his begotten. Moses thought it was a sufficient antidote against any thing contrary to love, to those two Israelites, that they were Brethren of one house; yea of one Father, even God, why should they strive or, wrong each other, Acts 7. 26.
7. They are meekly and wisely to use all faithfull 7. In diswading Parents from soulevills and dangers. endeavours, to disswade Parents, and to take them off, from whatsoever might in danger their very souls welfare, for that is love indeed.
Hence by allusion of such Children, Hos. 2. 2. Plead with your Mother, plead saith God to the good Children of the Church: Children may in such a way, and must plead with their very Mothers. Good Jonathan did wisely deal with his Father, and said to him, 1 Sam. 19. 4. Let not the King sin against his servant, against David, because he hath not sinned against thee, and because his works have been to thee-ward very good, &c.
8: They are cordially to symphathize with 8. In sympathising with Parents. their Parents in their joyes or sorrows, Ge. 44. 34. How shall I go up to my Father and the Lad not with me, lest peradventure I see the evill that shall come on my Father, Gen. 37. 35. All Jacobs Sons and Daughters rose up to comfort him. Use 1. Of Reproof of Childrens unnaturallness to Parents.
1. Use of reproof. 1. It serves to reprove such wretched Children who even in these very dayes [Page 77] of Gospel-light, are without naturall affection to their Parents: You have this charged upon the Heathen, Rom. 1. 31. That they were [...], but the Apostle, 2 Tim. 3. 3, 5. Chargeth it upon Christians also, who had a form of godliness, and I wish too many such were not to be found amongst Christians, and such as would be thought some body for Religion. Some indeed restrain this in 2 Tim. 3. 3. To Parents unnaturallness to Children, which yet upon Rom. 1. 31. expound it of Childrens unnaturallnesse to Parents: but there is no need to restrain it to either onely Parents, or onely Children, the word is the same, in the Greek in both places: and its well known that the word [...], signifies most properly that affection of love, whereby either Parents respect their Children, or Children againe respect their Parents: And [...], are persons without that affection, whether they be Parents or Children, and so in the Bible put out by the late synod, they well note upon that, Rom. 1. 31. That the sin there taxed by the Apostle, did reign among the Gentiles, who sacrificed in some places their aged Parents, and sometimes their Children, unto their Idols: exposed them to ruine, and destroyed them, though not guilty of any capitall crimes, and they refer to 2 Tim. 3. 3. as the same in sense: but that part of unnaturalnesse which we here deal withall, is that of the Children to the Parents, though we acknowledge, that all the aggravations of this sin, deduceable from those two Scriptures are appliable as well to unnaturalness in Parents, with which I deale not at present, as to unnaturalnesse in Children, of which I am now speakiag.
But that we lose not our bottome for the reproof, [Page 79] are there not too many Children of Christians, who are as those spoken of, 2 Tim. 3. 3, 4. Heady and unruly Children to their Parents? Fathers and Mothers cannot, shall not, now rule Signes of it. them, their words they care not for, and their blowes they as little regard, are not these void of naturall affection to their Parents? Some there are who are treacherous to their very Parents also, Traytors they are called as, 2 Tim. 3. 3, 4. Such as Parents know not how to trust with their Counsels, Secrets, Estates, or occasions, they are so false to them: as Micah complained in his time, Micah 7. 5, 6. and have these genuine affection to their Parents? Some will cunningly draw their very Parents into some sinfull snares, as some Sons and Daughters do Parents into errours, Deut. 13. 6. or as Lots Daughters, who drew him first to drink too much of their wine, and then drew him into incest, Gen. 19. 33, 35. but do such love, or are not they rather baters, grand-enemies to their Parents? Some there are who rise up against their good Parents, and even for their goodness: Some neglect to do for them in their needs: Some there are who are ready to give reviling speeches to their Parents, Exod. 21. to strike at them, ibid. or to scoffe at them, Prov. 30 17. or to imbesil or wast their estates, Pro. 19. 26. or at least to wast their farthers (viz. their Spirits) hasten their end, by their lewd courses: and care not though they know what crosse courses they take, do even break their Parents hearts, yet will on: But do any such as you are, honour Parents with the Honour of respect and love? Surely no, you are [...] ▪ without filiall affection: what ever your form of godliness may be, to be sure it is without power, 2 Tim. 3. 3, 5. Such as you are make the [Page 78] times perilous, vers. 1. and you carry a very black Evills of it. brand of persons given up to a reprobate mind; for persons given up to a reprobate mind, Rom. 1. 28. they are noted out to be without naturall affection, vers. 31. But wo be to all such unnaturall wretches, as you are, your ruine hasteth; let unnaturall Absolom's end be a warning to all such.
2. It serves to reprove Parents, who by your 2. Of Parents some way occasioning alienation of Childrens hearts from them. own sins lay stumbling blocks in your Childrens way, to tempt them to unnaturallness in affection, or alienation of affection, or any abatement of that Honour of respect and love, which they owe to you: for though it be the Childs great sin, to be so alienated in affection to Parents, yet you that are Parents may do too much to occasion the same, as,
1. By committing some heinous sin against God, against your Parents, or against others, and 1 By some grosse sin of theirs against God. so bring this as a curse upon your Children to be so unnaturall; as we shewed in the unnaturall sins of the Canaanites, mentioned, Lev. 20. 9, 12, &c. to the 23. as a just fruit of the curse upon Canaan, and upon Cham his Father: It was unnaturallness in Absolom to take up the sword against his own Father, and to defile his Father bed openly before all, 2 Sam. 15. 16. but it is no more then God by Nathan threatned David with for his Murther and Adultery, that he would raise up evill to him out of his own house, 2 Sam. 12. 9, 10, 11.
2. By unnaturall carriages towards your 2. By too unnaturall carriages towards Children. Children; (for there are too often) too many of such also found, even amongst professing Parents) or too many Churlish, harsh and strange carriages, bitter and reviling speeches, unmercifull and cruell [Page 80] correctings, and punishings of them: any of these are apt to sowr Childrens Spirits, and to breed alienation of heart from you that are Pareets, as Labans Daughters said of their Father Laban, in some heat of Spirit, Gen. 31. 14, 15. Is there yet any portion in our Fathers house, (they care not how soon they are gon farther from him) are we not counted of him strangers?
3. By too much greedinesse after the world, 3. By Covetous pinchings making thereby your Children more like slaves for your profits, then Children, & as basely putting them off, when you have serv'd your turns by thē: this made Labans Daughters speak more harshly of their father, & took off their hearts somewhat from him, Ge. 31. 14, 15. He hath sold us, say they, & hath quite devoured our money, Prov. 15. 27. He that is greedy of gaine troubleth his own house, this way also as well as other waies by breeding disturbances and distances, even twixt them and their Children, and their Children and themselves.
4. By breaking just promises made, respecting 4. By breaking just promises with Children your Children, especially, in matters of disposall of them in marriage, as when Laban basely breaketh his promise of Rachel to Jacob, Ge. 29 18, 19, 25. his daughters harts could not get clear of these old matters, Ge. 31. 14, 15. He that sold us, &c. what portiō have we in his house? when children are crost in their just desires, as when Merab Sauls daughter is promised to David, 1 Sam. 28. 17. just when she was to have had him, then she is given to Adriel, v. 19. This must needs breed ill blood; yea, when Parents will force Children to break strongest engagements of love, lawfully made, to those they would have had, as when Michal Sauls Daughter loveth David and is given to him, 1 Sam. 18. 27, 28. and yet afterward given to Phalti, 1 Sam. 25. 44. [Page 81] or when Sampsons Wife is given away by his Father-in-Law to another, Judg. 15. 2. this provoked him to seek revenge of that wrong, vers. 3. 6. Or when you that are Parents will be forcing of matches for sinister and low ends upon your Children, crosse to the very bent of their minds; as Saul to cause his Daughter Merab to have Adriel, when she was to have had David; sad have been the mischiefes of this, in unnaturall acts of Children against very Parents, stirred up therein by such cross acting of Parents. One de Sales a French-man stifled his Father, a grave Counsellour in Tholous in France, because he would not consent to his marriage with one de la Hay. So in Fidelia and Caelestina too Italian Ladies, who crossed by their Father in their matching to their minds, they conspire his death, and got him murthered.
5. By misplacing your respects upon unworthy 5. By mispleacing affections upon unworthy Children. Children, as Isaac upon Esau, who proved one that little respected his Father, witness his crosse matchings to the grief of his Fathers heart, Gen. 25. 28. Isaac loved Esau, because he eat of his venison, Cap. 26. 34, 35. Esau took Judith and Balhshema, which were a grief of heart to Isaac and Rebeckah. David misplaced his respect upon Absolom, and loved him too well, and more than other his Children; and he proved the most unnaturall wretch to him of them all, 2 Sam. 15. Cristina a Switzer, she inordinately affected her Son Maurice, would hardly believe any evill report against him, though never so true, and this Fellow afterward turned a paricide, and by a wile drew his Mother to look into a deep wel, and there threw her in, where she perished. Use 2. For exhortation.
A second use of this branch of the generall point is for exhortation.
[Page 82] 1. To Children, to cherrish, strengthen, and inlarge 1 To Children to cherish naturall respects of love to Parents. your respect and love to your Parents: wherein I may say as Aristotle doth in his Ethicks, l. 8. Cap. 16. speaking of the honour due to God and Parents, [...], No man can give them the honour whereof they are worthy: only he that to his utmost doth endeavour to give them highest respect, he may be called pious. Children are never able to aequalize, Motives to it. or match Parents love to their Children; Parents love to Children, is as to so many pieces of themselves, but Childrens love to Parents, is as of those who come from them: So that Parents love to Children descendeth, as from springs or Fountaines to the streames issuing from them, and therefore runneth down more strongly, freely, and uncessantly: but Childrens love to Parents is ascending, & therefore moveth more slowly and gently, and needeth more help in its motion: Aristotle observeth well, that of which any thing is generated, is by a greater and more forcible necessity nearly knit to that which is generated of it, than that which is born and generated is to that which begot it, Eth. l. 8. Cap. 14. Parents love also hath the start of time to that of their Childrens, for Parents love their Children as soon as they are born, but Children love their Parents and respect them, when they come to understanding and are of some years: Parents prevented Children in their love, Children can never overtake them therein, only must follow them as hard in the way of love as they can: Children, when little Children have nothing to give Parents, to be a temptation to bribe their affections to them, nor are they of any power [Page 83] to curb them any way, to enforce respects to them, and so they are more pure: Whereas in both these regards, Childrens respects to Parents may be leavened: Yea, Parents, as Parents, are instruments in Gods hands, of their Childrens Souls being in their bodies, and so of the faculties of their Souls, and so of their naturall affections in them, and of that affection of love and fear amongst the rest, and therefore they may well chalenge the honourable improvement of them to themselves, so far as God alloweth the same.
To conclude, Children will never honour Parents, with the honour of Reverence, Obedience, or Recompence, or the like, unlesse they give the honour of respect & love due to them, therefore give them this their due. Now that Children may be helped and furthered in doing this. Helps to it. 1 Dread of the vile sin of unnaturalnesse.
1. Possesse your hearts with a deep sense and dread of the heinous nature of the sin of unnaturalness, which is wont to be accompanied with the vilest sins against God and Man: as by comparing Rom. 2. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32. and 2 Tim. 3. 2, 3, 4. may be discerned: Such persons who are without naturall affections, commonly proving Blasphemous against God, ingrateful to God and men, unholy, truce and Covenant-breakers, whisperers, back-biters, false accusers of others, they are commonly given to uncleanness, and wantonness, they are fierce and furious, of a cruell Salvage, unmercifull & implacable spirit, they are despisers of those that are good, they are even haters of God: they are haters of other men, of a spightfull, malicious, quarrelsome, and envious Spirit, in a word, They are full of all unrighteousnesse, and deceit themselves, and inventors of evill things, evill opinions, evill practises, ringleaders in sin, authors [Page 84] of sin to others. If sundry of these scandalous persons in old and new England were closely search'd into, they would be found to be persons, who have been & are unnaturall to their Parents.
2. Take heed of any leading causes which breed and feed unnaturalness, and undermine naturall 2. Avoiding causes of unnaturalnesse of affection as, 1. Ignorance. affection to Parents: such as are,
1. Ignorance of God, and of his word, and of the matters of Religion, Rom 1. 31. without understanding, without naturall affection; if without understanding, what wonder if without naturall affection?
2. Self-love, for they that are so full of self-love, 2. Self-love. have never a due proportion of love left for God or man, for Parents or others: 2 Tim. 3. 2. For men shall be lovers of themselves, and verse 3. without naturall affection.
3. A worldly, covetous Spirit, ibid. Covetous, 3. Covetousnesse. without naturall affection: a Spirit of the love of the world will eat out, as the love of the Father of our Spirits, John 2. 15. so that of the Father of our flesh also, whose Fatherhood is an Image of that in God: Such, if they shew respect to Parents, it is but for their own advantage and gaine, and if the respect to them may not stand with their gain, or must be to their outward losse, then adieu respect to Parents.
4. A proud Spirit, 2 Tim. 3. 3, 4. Without naturall affection, high-minded. Absolom who was so Pride. high-minded, what wonder is it if he prove so unnaturall to his Father?
5. A Voluptuous Spirit, ibid. Without naturall affection, lovers of pleasures more then lovers of God: Voluptuousnesse. They that respect their pleasures so much, they never respect God as they shold, nor their parents. Esaus inordinatenesse of affection to his hunting, [Page 85] brings him to that, Gen. 25. that he despiseth his birth-right, as his Fathers eldest Son, and therein virtually despiseth his Father, and his voluptuous desires after the Canaanitish women, make him carelesse of grieving his Father and Mother, and so far unnaturall to them, Gen. 26. 3. Getting their hearts truly turned to the Lord.
3. Labour to get your hearts turned to God effectually, and in love with him as a Father, and then whatsoever alienations of heart there were in you from your Parents before, yet then Childrens hearts will be also turned fully to your good Parents Ma. 4. 6. Jo. Baptist (its said) by the blessing of grace upon his Ministry, turning persons to the Lord, to the faith, to the wisedome of the Just, (as Luke hath said it, Luk. 1. 17.) he shall turn the hearts of the Children to their good Fathers, which whilest the Children were wicked, they could not well abide to be controuled, reproved, curbed and corrected, as they were by them, and so their good Fathers also, whose hearts were much taken off from those Children for their vilenesse should be turned towards their Children, or as some say, the unnaturall distances bred betwixt Parents and Children, by many sects and opinions, too rife among the Jewes, when by sound doctrine they were brought to rights, and to the truth, those alienations should be healed. Only Cautions about Childrens love to Parents. 1. Not such as to approve sin in Parents. in the love of Children to Parents, let these cautions be observed,
1. Look that it be not such as to approve of the evill saiyings, principles, or practises of your ungodly, or of your seducing or seduced Parents. Its blamed in them, Psal. 40. 13. their posterity approve their sayings, Jer. 7. 18. The Children gather wood, and the Fathers kindle a fire, and the women knead the dough, to make Cakes to the Queen of [Page 86] heaven. 2 King. 15. 13. Asaph loved his Mother well, as his Mother, but he hateth her Idol, he destroyeth and burneth it. Abraham loveth his Father Terah well, but will not go after his way of Idol-worship,, Josh. 24. 2, 3. God commendeth it in the Son, who seeth all his fathers sins, and considereth and doth not such like, Ezek. 18. 14.
2. Let it not be such, as to follow their evill Of 2. Such as to follow their sinfull Counsell, Counsel in any thing, as Ahaziah who walked in the waies of Ahab, for his Mother was his Consellour, 2 Chron. 22. 3. And as Herodias who being before instructed of her Mother, said to Herod, give me here John Baptists head in a charger, Mat. 14. 8.
3. Let it not be so as to keep their dangerous Or 3. Such as to keep their sinfull Counsel and wicked Counsel, in any way of wickednesse, but rather seasonably to reveal it; Michol Sauls Daughter, did well in this, to tell her husband David, of her Fathers Sauls bloody design against him, so that he escaped, 1 Sam. 19. 11, 12. The like did Jonathan to David, Cap. 20 3, 4.
4. That it be not so, as when you are called of Or 4. Not to bear seasonable witness against their evils. God to it, then not to bear seasonable witnesse against their sin, as in case of Parents seducing Children from the Lord and his worship, In case of grosse Idolatry, or the like: then zealous Levi saith to his Father and to his Mother, I have not seen him, Deut. 33. 9. And Asaph an highest Civill Ruler, called to do justice without respect of persons, he removeth Maacha his Idolatrous Mother from her Regency, 1 King. 15. 13.
5. That it be not so, as when you are called Or 5. Such as for them, to neglect just respects to others to maried conditions, then for Parents sakes, to neglect just respects to your spouses, and regard to your Families welfare, Gen. 30. 30. in that case [Page 87] Jacob will say to Laban his Father-in-Law, when shall I provide for my house, and that Law, Gen. 2. 24. taketh here place, for this cause shall a man forsake Father and Mother and cleave to his Wife.
2. Of exhortation to Parents to carry it so, 2. To Parents to carry it so as may win respect. as may even win and gain such respect and love from your Children, which is due from them; as for instance.
1. Be frequently instructing your Children in the best things, in their Soul-matters: this won Solomons heart the more to his Father David, insomuch that he keepeth a honourable record of his Fathers instructions, Prov. 4 4, 5, 6, &c. The bond of love is doubled, when natural Fathers, by Gods blessing upon their instructions and admonitions, become spirituall Fathers of their Children, and a twofold cord is not easily broken.
2. Be ever and anon incouraging your Children 1. By incouraging them in good. in any good thing; hence that Allusion, Isa. 66. 13. as on whom his Mother comforteth: which as they are more abundantly encouraged by them, so enlarged also in affections to them. Famous is the example of William Hunters Mother, as he was leading to the stake for Christ; Son William, (saith she) I think thee as well bestowed, as ever any Mr. Fox Acts and Mon. Child that I bare in my womb: and that example of the Mother of that little Child, which was Martyred with Romanus, who stood by incouraging her Child, and when all others almost wept to see the Childs tortures, she stood by rejoycing: and when that fatall act of cruelly was to be done upon the Child, to take away its Head, after she had taken her Child and kissed it, she stood by singing, All laud and praise, with heart and voice, [Page 88] O Lord we yield to thee, To whom the death of all thy Saints, We know most dear to be: bidding the Child also to remember the children of Bethlehem, who were martyr'd for Christ.
3. Be ready to defend, and vindicate Children 3. By defending them in a just cause. in any just cause, as Joash did his Son Gedeon, against those that complained of him for throwing down Baals Altar, Judg. 6. 29, 30, 31. and Joash said to them, will yee plead for Baal, will ye save him? he that will plead for him, let him be put to death, if he be a God, let him plead for himself: the blind-mans Parents did not thus, who out of a base fear, put off all to their Son, he is old enough, let him answer for himself, John 9. 21. yea let Parents vindicate their children from unjust slanders as the Father of the wronged Damsel was to do, Deut. 22. 13. to 9. this must needs win love.
4. Be conscionable, sollicitous of your childrens 4. By care of their outward weal. outward welfare, as was Jacob of his Sons, Ge. 37. 14. and Jesse of his Son, 1 Sam. 17. 17. this also much gaineth upon childrens hearts.
5. Carry it towards your children with much 5. By Compassionatness toward them. tenderness and bowels, as need and prudence requireth, Numb. 11. 12. Carry them in thy bosom, as a nursing Father the sucking child, Psal. 103. 13. as a Father patieth his children, Mal. 3. 17. as a Father spareth his Son that serveth him: this, as it breaketh every way-ward heart of a child, so it winneth the Son; as it is in the fruit of Gods bowels expressed to his children, so in mens to theirs.
CHAP. IV. Of Honour of Reverence due from children to Parents.
WE have handled that first branch of Honour of Parents, in a direct way, we now proceed to the second, which is the Honour of Reverence: for so Honour is taken, as we shewed in the 1. Chapter. Observe then as a second branch of the generall point, that,
Children are to Honour their Parents with the Honour of Reverence, Levit. 19. 3. Ye shall fear Honour of Reverence due to Parents. every man his Mother and every man his Father, Heb. 12. 9. the Fathers of our flesh, which corrected us, and we gave them due reverence. For the better handling of this part of Childrens duty, we shall first shew wherein this Reverence of Parents consisteth and is expressed, and 2. Make use of it.
Touching the first we say: this Reverence due to Parents, is either outward or inward.
1. Then outward Reverence is due from children 1. Outward, as to Parents: and so, 1. Children are to rise up and to stand bare before their Parents, when they come to them, or speak to them: for if of Fathers in age, God saith, Rise up before the hoary head, and Honour the face of the old man, Levit. 19. 31. [Rising to Parents,] he surely requireth it of children to their own Parents: Henre the excuse of Rachel, though a married woman, from unavoidable necessity, as reason why she rose not up to her Father Laban, Gen. 31. 35. And Rachel said to her Father, Let it not displease my Lord, that [Page 90] I cannot rise up before thee, for the custome of women is upon me; it must be some avoidable necessity that must be a just reason that children rise not up before their Parents, else Parents have just reason to be displeased, when Achsah daughter to Caleb, is to request a thing of her Father, she keepeth not her posture of sitting, in which she was before, but lighteth off the beast she rode upon, and then speaketh her mind to her Father, Judg. 1. 13, 14, 15. It stands not with Parents Honour, for children to sit and speak, but rather they should stand up when they speak to Parents.
2. If Parents be comming towards children, they 2. To meet parents comming. are to prevent them, and meet them, 1 Kings 2. 19. Bathsheba went to Salomon, to speak for Adonijah, and the King rose up to meet her.
3. They are to bow to them, so Salomon, 1 Kings 3. To bow to them. 2. 19. he bowed himself to his Mother, So Joseph, Gen. 48. 12. and Joseph brought them out from between his Fathers knees, and he bowed himself with his face to the earth. So Moses to his Father-in-Law did obey sance: and all these their Sons, were great men, yet not too great or high to stoop in way of Honour of Reverence to Parents.
4. They must speak Reverently both to their 4. To speak to them and of them reverently. Parents, and of them to others. To them: thence those titles of Honour expressed in childrens speeches to Parents: as in Rachels to Laban, Gen. 31. 35. let not my Lord be displeased: So in Isaac's to Abraham, Gen. 22. 7. my Father, &c. So in Davids to Saul, 1 Sam. 24. 11. moreover see my Father, &c. And cap. 26. 28. wherefore doth my Lord thus pursue after his Servant? &c. So in speaking of them, Prov. 31. 28. her children rise up, aad call her blessed. 5. To attend duly to their counsells.
5. They are to attend reverently to their counsels, [Page 91] or instructions, Prov. 4. 1. hear ye children he instruction of a Father, and attend to know understanding, and vers. 20. My Son, attend to my words.
6. They must meekly and humbly subject 6. To subject to their Corrections. themselves to their seasonable corrections, Heb. [...]2. 9. if Fathers of our flesh correcting us, we gave them reverence, shall we not much rather be in subjection to the Father of Spirits (correcting of us) and live?
7. To express filial shame and blushing to Parents, 7. To blush and be ashamed of faults. upon occasion of faults and sins against them, especially when Parents deal with children for the same: the Greek word in Heb. 12. 9. we gave them reverence, it is [...], which properly signifies, we turned away our face, by reason of shame. Numb. 22. 14. if her Father had spit in her face, should she not be ashamed? Hitherto belong humble confessions to Parents, with shame and blushing of unworthy acts of children against them especially. Like the Prodigall in the parable, who, Luke 15. 21. saith to his Father, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in thy sight, and am no more worthy to be call'd thy Son: in this sense is the Greek word [...] used, Company not with them that they may be ashamed, even outwardly also confess, and take holy shame for their scandals: So Tit. 2. 8. that he that is of the contrary part may be ashamed, having no evill thing to say of you.
2. Inward Reverence is due from Children to Or inward. as inwardly to fear. Parents, Levit. 19. 3. ye shall fear every one his Mother and his Father; and so Children
1. They are inwardly to own the very persons 1. Their persons. and parentall relations, and Authority of their Parents: ye shall fear every man his Mother and [Page 92] Father, (that is) their very persons, relations and Authority.
2. They are inwardly to awe the command [...] 2. Their words. reproofs, threats and corrections of Parents: thi [...] is filial and not slavish fear, Jer. 35. 6. Jonadab's posterity, even when tempted to do otherwise, yet the awe of his commands, made them not to dare to transgress them.
3. They are inwardly to fear to lose parents favour, 3. To lose their favour. or to incur their just displeasure, by giving them any just offence, as Jacob, Gen. [...]7. 12. My Father peradventure will feel me, and I shall seem to him as a deceiver, and I shall bring a curse upon me and not a blessing.
4. They are to fear to cross any weighty intents, 4. To cross their just intents. purposes, or desires of parents, especially when in sacred matters: so Jephtah his daughter, Judg. 11. 36. and she said, My Father, if thou hast opened thy mouth unto the Lord, do to me according to that which hath proceeded out of thy mouth.
5. They are to fear that trouble or heart-grief 5. To grieve them. should be occasioned to parents, if they can prevent it. So Saul, 1 Sam. 9. 5. Come, let us return, lest my Father leave caring for the Asses, and take thought for us. So Judah, Gen. 44. 34. how shall I go to my Father, and the Lad be not with me, lest peradventure I see the evill that shall come upon my Father.
6. They are to fear to fall short of their blessing, 6. To fall short of their blessing. and benefit of parents prayers, and of their godly parentall wishes and Counsels; hence when Joseph heard that his Father Jacob was so sick, he made such haste to him, carrying his sons with him, that he and they might not miss of Jacobs blessing: even rude Esau was amazed, when he heard that his Father had blessed his brother instead [Page 93] of him, Gen. 27. 34. hence that bitter cry, Bless me, even me also O my Father.
7. They are also to be inwardly, as well as outwardly 7. To be inwardly also ashamed of faults before them. ashamed, that parents have just cause of distaste against them at any time; so giving reverence to parents, Heb. 12. 9. may according to the Greek word used there, be rendered, being ashamed before them; hence the derivative from that verb is used, 1 Cor. 6. 5. and 15. 34. to signifie shame inward and outward; as there, I speak this to your shame; even of heart also. So here the Awfull childe, like that prodigall, occasioning just distaste in his Father against him, he is inwardly ashamed of it, and therefore confesseth his sin against his Father, and unworthiness to be called his Son. All which is clearly seen in the presidentiall filial fear of Gods children to their heavenly Father: they inwardly fear his Fatherhood and Fatherly Authority, his commands, reproofs, threats, and corrections, the loss of his favour and incurring of his displeasure, by their offending of him at any time: they are affraid to cross his mind in any thing, or to grieve his Spirit themselves, or that it should be grieved by others, they are affraid to fall short of his Fatherly blessing, and are inwardly ashamed, and even confounded that at any time they offend, displease, grieve, or provoke him.
The use of this branch of the point serveth, Use 1. For reproof 1. Of childrens irreverence. 1. For Reproof, 1. Of Children, for all that rudeness, and irreverence of yours towards your parents, as if you had forgotten that you were children: or as if principles of piety, yea of morality, were extinct in you; And this alas how common an evill is it in children, even of professours? how [Page 94] rudely do they sit before their parents, and how irreverently do they carry it, in their gestures before them? how loud will too many be gabling laughing and flouting, even in their parents presence? how forward are they to prevent or interrupt their parents in speaking, or to answer them again if rebuked by them? whereas those in Job▪ time, even Princes and Nobles, refrained talking▪ in his presence, or whil'st he as a civill Father of the state was speaking, Job 29. 9, 10. and vers. 22. after his words they spake not again. Elihu, when in the presence of Fathers to him in Age, is affraid to speak, much more to interrupt them whil'st speaking, Job 32. 4, 6, 7. And dare children word it so before their parents? Again, how over-familiar do too many children make themselves with their parents? as if hail-fellow well met (as they say) and no difference twixt parent and child; yea too many there are, who carry it proudly, disdainfully and scornfully towards parents, and its well if their very parents escape their flouts; but what the end of such graceless children will be, we have shewed from Prov. 30. 17. Again, how are many children ready to chop it with their parents, and (as we say) to chop logick with them? it may be so daring are they as to bid their very parents hold their tongue, as some profaner ones have done; or how ever, if not going so high, yet giving to parents very cross, curt, and curst answers. As Jacobs sons did sometimes to him, Gen. 34. 31. should he deal with our sister, as with an Harlot? like the elder son in the Parable, who even chideth, and checketh his Father, for entertaining his younger brother better then him, Luke 15. 29. Again how frowardly and discontentedly do many children carry it to their Parents [Page 95] no diet, no clothing, no lodging and the like, which parents can provide for them, will content them, but as if parents were beholding to them, or that they had wronged their children, and must seek to please them, if they knew how. Like the Elder son in the Parable, which findeth fault with his usage by his Father, as so much below his serviceableness to him. And are there not too many children, who are ready to mutter and grumble at their parents counsels, commands, just threats, rebukes, or corrections? yea will not some plainly contest and contend with their parents? as Rebecka's daughters-in-Law; who by such like unreverent carriages made her even weary of her life, Gen. 26. 35. with 27. 46. they were a grief of mind [...] the septnagint renders it [...], such as did contend, or were contentious, or rebellious; how little also do too many children dread their parents commands, counsels, prohibitions, reproofs, or corrections? how little do they fear the loss of their favour or blessing, or the incurring of their just displeasure or curse? how little care they whether they be contented and comforted in them, and in what they say or do, or otherwise be troubled and discouraged? and in all how shameless are they? but all such as you are do proclame to all the world, that there is no fear of God before your eyes, as it is evident in Cain, Hophni, and Phinebas, and other such graceless children, whose just doome will be, to be as Cain, and as is threatned to graceless persons, that they shall be in fear, where no fear, or cause of fear, is, Psal. 53. 5. shall flee, when none pursueth them, Prov. 28. 1. and for the want of this due fear of parents, if you repent not, eternall dread and horrour will be your portion in another world.
[Page 96] 2. It serveth to reprove parents, who any way 2. Of Parents undermining this their Honour—1. By contemptible carriages. undermine this filial awe and Reverence which your children owe unto you: and that,
1. By carrying it any way contemptibly, and unbeseeming your selves in your childrens sight; as did Noah, first by being drunk, and then by uncovering his nakedness, within view of others: this gave occasion to Chams unreverent speeches of him unto his brethren, Gen. 9. 21, 22, 23. Cham saw the nakedness of his Father, in his tent, and went and told his brethren without; when parents are frothy, slighty, foolish, or any way ridiculous in their gestures, speeches, or actions, before their children, this breedeth, or feedeth contempt and irreverence in their children. Look as the very conceit of unseemly behaviour in David, that Father of the state, made Michol despise him her heart, and speak unreverently of him with her lips, 2 Sam. 6. 16, 20, 21. How glorious (saith she scoffingly) was the King of Israel to day, who uncovered himself to day, in the eyes of the hand-maids of his servants, as one of the vain fellows shamelessely uncovereth himself! the like will any reall discovery, of morall, or spirituall nakedness before the Family, become an occasion to children and servants to despise the Father of the Family.
2. By being too fond of your children, or too familiar 2. By overmuch fondness and familiarity. with them at sometimes at least, & not keeping constantly your due distance; such fondness and familiarity breeds and causeth contempt & irreverence in children. Good Abraham was somewhat too fond of Ishmael, as appeareth by his overlooking the promise of Isaac, and going on to urge God, that Ishmael might live in his sight. Isaac was too fond of Esau, when he loved him so for his venison, Gen. 25. 28. David was too fond of his [Page 97] Absolom, that when he was justly banished for his wilfull fratricide, and deserved death rather for it, yet Davids soul longed (or was in a wasting plight, as it is in the Hebrew) to go forth unto Absolom, 2 Sam. 13. 39. but what unreverent children all these proved to their Parents, their stories shew.
3. By complying too much with any vain motions 3. By sinfull compliance with children. of your children: this was a sin in the Mother of James and John, who had so ambitious a motion to make to Christ, Mark. 10. 35. that she would move it for them, Matth. 20. 20, 21. she commeth desiring that her two Sons may sit, one at his right hand, the other at his left hand, in his kingdome. David would never cross Adonijah in his desires or doings, he never displeased him at any time, in saying, why hast thou done so? 1 Kings 1. 6 but Adonijah careth not to cross his Father in his mind, of one to succeed him in his throne, even Solomon, and yet Adonijah knew well enough, it had been publickly, and sufficiently declared formerly, as in 1 Chron. 23. 1. and 28. 5. yet 1 Kings 1. 5. he exalteth himself and saith, I will be King, and vers. 7. he conferreth with Joab and Abiathar about it for their help therein.
4. By reproachfull and reviling speeches to 4. By rayling upon children. your children, in rashness of anger and fury, or by any other uncivill, or unseemly expressions of rage against them, as flinging things at them, which might indanger life or limb, or the like; this provoked Jonathan to say and do somewhat savouring of unreverence to a Parent, 1 Sam. 20. 30. thou son of the perverse and rebellious woman (saith Saul his Father to him) and v. 33. he cast a Javeling at him; and v. 34. Jonathan arose from the Table in fierce anger; some unwise Parents, at some [Page 98] times will be over-familiar with their children, and at other times as much too harsh and fiery against them, and by such an unequall carriage, come to be slighted by them.
The second use serveth for exhortation, and 2. Use for exhortation. 1. To children to Reverence Parents. that 1. To children:
Do you then strive, what in you lyeth, to give this Honour of Reverence, both outward and inward, which is due to your Parents. And for this end consider, 1. Of some Motives. 2. Two or three helps.
Motives. 1. It will breed and feed in you due Motives to it. 1. It furthereth reverence to other superiours. Reverence to all other superiours; hence in the fifth Commandement, Honour of Parents, and therein Honour of Reverence of them, is put for the like Honour of Magistrates, Ministers, and Masters, from their subjects, people, and servants; if the one be in persons in truth in the former relation, it will be in them in the latter.
2. It wil be a notable means to prevent many other 2. It preventeth other sins. sins of yours, which would be dishonourable to parents. Moses having rehearsed many abominable practices of the Canaanites in Levit. 18. and in the last verse said, ye shall not commit any of those abominable customes, Chap. 19. 3. he chargeth them to fear every man his Mother and his Father; and vers. 4. also adjoyneth, that they should not turn to Idols, &c. or apostatise from God and his worship: Surely then that Reverence unto Parents, is inserted as a help, both against the former, and against the later evils and scandals; and wofull experience evinceth this, that where this hedge of childrens Reverence and awe to Parents is broken down, there is a free inlet of vilest and most scandalous 3. The power of Parents to bless, or curse children. courses.
3. There is in your Parents some paternall power, if justly used, to bless and to curse you, Gen. [Page 99] 49. is a record of Jacobs blessing of his Sons; and in an ordinary way, there is a proportion thereof in other Parents, and therefore the rather Awe your Parents.
Helps this way may be such as these. Helps to it. 1. Awe of God.
1. Labour for a filial awe of God, as your Father, and so of his Fatherly commands, and consequently of this his command, as his command, and of his displeasure against you, if it be not attended and observed.
2. Labour you for more holiness of heart. It 2. Holiness. is profaness of heart God-ward, which breedeth and feedeth irreverence to Parents; and so contrariwise, the more holy God-ward, the more awfull of Parents. Levit. 19. 2. be ye holy for I am holy, and vers. 3. yea shall fear every one his Mother, &c.
3. Present your Parents so to your minds, as 3. Eye the Image of God in Parents bearing the Image of Gods Father-hood, and that also will help on your filiall awe and Reverence to them.
2. It serveth for exhortation to Parents, to carry 2. Exhortation to Parents, to further filial Reverence in their children. 1. By your piety. it so as may gain Reverence and awe from your children; for which end.
1. Carry it very piously in your places, for that will gain awe in your inferiours, children or others. Job 29. 7. when I prepared my seat in the street (saith holy Job) the young men saw me and hid themselves, vers. 8. let but any other Godly man come suddainly where rude persons are met, how doth the very sight of him, oftentimes appale them? as experience witnesseth; the Image of Gods holiness in any is venerable.
2. Season your children betime with principles 2. By right principling of them. of religion, of their duty to God, to Parents, to others; so did Eve her Seth, and Seth his Cainan, [Page 100] and Cainan his Mahaleel, &c. and all of them proved well to God and man-ward.
3. Bring them oft to Gods aweful and awing 3. By inuring them to holy Assemblies. Assemblies, where they will hear and learn Reverence to God or men. Deut. 31. 12. gather men, women and children, that they may hear, and learn, and fear the Lord thy God, and observe to do all the words of this Law: even this of the fifth Commandement also. Honour Father and Mother with the Honour of Reverence.
4 Correct them wisely and seasonably, as for 4. By correcting irreverence in them. other sins, so for those which savour of irreverence to Parents; this by the Lords blessing will help on filial Reverence; hence those two joyned, Heb. 12. 9. we had Fathers of our flesh, who corrected us, and we did them Reverence; there is a great deal of folly, and so a bundle of irreverence also, in a childs heart naturally, but God saith, the rod of correction shall drive it far from him, Prov. 22.
5. Acquaint your Children ever and anon 5. By minding children oft of Gods judgements. with Gods more awing and dreadfull providences, especially respecting Children, which gave not their Parents reverence, as of Cham, Absolom, and others. The punishment of a stubborn Son, by mans hand, must be so as all Israel may hear and fear, Deut. 21. 21. So let all our Children hear of Gods hand this way, that they may fear the sins of dishonour of Parents.
6. Inure them to awfull subjection and obeysance 6. By inuring them to filiall subjection. to you as Parents, betimes; early practising of filial Reverence, will strengthen and stablish a very habit of it; hence the requisit in Church officers, or elders and deacons, 1 Tim. 3. 4. 12. having their children in subjection with gravity or honesty; they must see they be inur'd to reverence, and seemly carriages towards them, [Page 101] and before them, and then others that come to their houses will find this, to the Elders Honour.
CHAP. V. Of Honour of Obedience due to Parents.
NOw we come to the third branch of direct Honour of obedience due to parents. Honour, namely Honour of obedience; for so Honour is taken in Scripture as we shewed before.
Observe then as a third branch of the generall point, that children are to Honour their Parents with the Honour of obedience. Honour thy Father and Mother, saith Exod. 20. 12. but obeying them is Honouring of them, say other Scriptures (as we shewed, Chap. 1.) therefore children are bound to yield obedience to their Parents.
For the fuller handling of this particular, we shall inquire,
- 1. Wherein this Honour of filial obedience It consisteth,consisteth.
- 2. What manner of obedience it is which must be yielded.
- 3. Why children must yeeld it. 1. In childrens being content to be set about meanest imployments.
- 4. What use is to be made of this branch of Honour of Parents.
To the first I answer, that filial obedience consisteth,
1. In childrens being content to be set about meanest imployments, even as though they were servants, their Parents so requiring it, hence that Mal. 3. 17. his son which serveth him. Neither [Page 102] Rebekah, nor Rachel, though of able Parents, thought much to keep their Fathers sheep, Gen. 24. and Chap. 29. neither did Christ himself refuse to be subject to his Parents in their meaner imployments, Luke 2. 51. Matth. 13. 55. his reputed Father Joseph, was a Carpenter, of a very mean Trade: hence that, Is not this the Capenters Son? but Mark. 6. 3. these neighbours and Countreymen of Christ, as man, who had most cause to note his usuall imployments, they say of him, Is not this the Carpenter, the Son of Mary? surely then he learned and commonly practised that mean Trade with his reputed Father, and so was therein also subject to his Father and Mother. Look as Gods children, yea look as Jesus Christ himself, the pattern of all true filial obedience to Parents, refused not to stoop to the meanest offices and services, in obedience to the Father of Spirits: so must children carry it in like sort to their Parents. All know how many mean and despicable offices Parents do about their children, whilest babes and little ones, and when sick, &c. And there is no cause for any childe to think much of the meanest office and service, which Parents may call for from their hands. Parents Authority is of no mean descent, the rise or originall of it is from God: even the greatness of the greatest in other respects, doth not alter, much less make null, filial relations. If any be ashamed of the Lords words, of him will he be ashamed another day, Mark. 8. 38. Now this, Children obey your Parents in the Lord, (according to the Lords will and word) is one of the Lords words, Eph. 6. 1. Let none therefore be ashamed of obedience to Parents in meanest 2. In their being content to be crossed in their wills. things.
2. In Childrens being content to be crossed in [Page 103] their own desires or wayes, and to yeeld to and obey Parents minds and wils, in matters lawfull, although the particulars seem to be very harsh to their own sense or reason, as in that instance, Gen. 48. 17. At first it displeased Joseph to see his Father lay his right hand upon Ephraims head, and he held up his Fathers hand to remove it to Manasses his head, and v. 18. Joseph said, not so my Father, for this is the first born, put thy right hand upon his head, v. 19. And his Father refused, and said: I know my Son, I know it, he also shall become great, but his brother shall be greater then he. And so he gave Ephraim the yonger Son the priority in his blessing; and Joseph said no more, but rested satisfied therein. If Jacobs Sons are injoyned by their Father to feed their flock even in Shechem, in the very mouth of danger, by reason of the late slaughter of the Shechemits by their hands, yet they are contented with it, and do not mutter, or object against it, Gen. 37. 14. nor do they object against the hazzards of that long Journey into Egypt, but if required by their Father to go, they contentedly obey, Gen. 42. 23: It was contrary to dictates of flesh, and blood, and reason, for Isaac to yeeld to be offered up in Sacrifice by his Father, but it was first no doubt made known to him by his Father to be Gods mind, and seconded by his Fathers command, and he quietly yeeldeth to his Father therein, Gen. 22. 9, 10. So in case of a daughters vow unto the Lord, in something which is lawfull, and which she earnestly desireth should be done before the Lord, if the vow be not heard by her father when it was made, and after dissallowed by her Father, God will have her, even in this case, to sit down contentedly, resigning her will to her Fathers, although [Page 104] she cannot perform what she vowed and desired, and God himself passeth it by, because it was not her Fathers mind, that she should perform it, Gen. 30. 5. Gods children are a pattern to mens children herein, who resign and submit their will to his will; children are to look at good Parents, as Gods Oracles unto them, such, by means of whom he imparteth his counsell to them, and maketh wiser then themselves, in matters respecting their occasions and changes. Obedience to Parents, in this way, is to be as to Superiours, yea as to the mind and Authority of the highest, in their mandates; which also is implied in that speech, Eph. 6. 1. Children obey Parents in the Lord, yea even in all things, as is expressed, Col. 3. 20. namely which are meet and lawfull: so to obey them, it is welpleasing to God, albeit in doing of it, children oft displease themselves. David is blamed, that he never displeased Adonijah his Son, 1 King. 1. 5, 6. surely then Adonijah had been too blame, if he had not yeelded to his Fathers mind, in things displeasing to himself.
3. In yeedling espccially to Parents minds in the matter of marriage. So Isaac matcheth with Rebekah, 3. In marrying according to good Parents minds. according to his Fathers mind, Gen. 24 6, 7. 63. compared; So Jacob marrieth Labans daughter, according to the mind of his Parents, Isaac and Rebekah, Gen. 28. 1, 2, 3. compared with Chap. 29. the like was done by many others mentioned in Scripture.
4. in obeying chiefly in things of God, as injoyned 4. In obeying in things of God. to children, in Gods name, by their Parents; whether respecting the knowledge of God in Christ, mortification, or in any other means, or parts of the souls welfare. In which especially Solomons Son must keep his Fathers Commandement, [Page 105] and not forsake the Law of his Mother, Prov. 6. 20. and 1 Kings 2. 3. David chargeth Solomon his Son, to keep the charge of the Lord his God, & to walk in his ways, & Ch. 3. 3. Solom. loved the Lord, walking in the statutes (or according to the statutes and commands) of David his Father. David charged him also with all the work of Gods Temple, which he duly and diligently performed, 1 Chro. 22. 11. build the house of the Lord thy God, which he hath said of thee; and he did so, as 2 Chr. 5. and cap. 6. sheweth; if Abraham command his children, the Lord concludeth they shall keep the way of the Lord, as in that place oft referred to, Gen. 18. 19. I know Abraham that he will command his children, and they shall keep the way of the Lord. Hence Joshuah is so confident of his house, and so of his children, Josh. 24. 15. but I and my house, we will serve the Lord: he requiring it of them, he is confident that they will do it. Jonadabs posterity, in living so in Tents, like pilgrims and strangers, in refusing to drink wine, or strong drink, they lived a mortified life, a weaned life from the world, but they did it because so injoyned by their Father Jonadab, and so by their next Parents successively; as we see in that place oft, occasionally, referred to in this discourse, 1 Jer. 35. 6, &c. In such a way God as a Father is especially honoured, and no wonder that there is his secret blessing and grace conferred, to inable to such like obedience to Parents commands. As in Gen. 18. 19. now mentioned, Abraham will command his children, and they shall walk in the way of the Lord. It strengthens the bond of childrens obedience to Parents commands, when Parents shew such soul-love to children, and intire love, and faithfulness to God, as to improve their parentall [Page 106] Authority thus for God; which is also included in that speech, Eph. 6. 1. Obey your Parents in the Lord: especially injoyning what the Lord requireth.
5. In childrens yeelding humbly, meekly and 5. In submission to parents just corrections. quietly to Parents just reproofs and corrections, Heb. 12. 9. The Fathers of our flesh corrected us and we gave them reverence, even in way of awfull subjection to them therein; whence this is added, shall we not much more be in subjection to the Father of Spirits and live? for what are such actings of Parents, but fruits of their obedience to God their Fathers eommands? who chargeth, Prov. 19. 18. Chasten thy Son, while there is hope, and Prov. 23. 13. withhold not correction from the child, and v. 14. thou shalt beat him, and Prov. 29. 17. Correct thy Son, and he shall give thee rest; yea they are fruits o [...] Parents love to their children, Heb. 12. 6, 7. Prov. 13. 14. he that loveth his Son, chasteneth him betimes. What are they but Gods ordinance, and appointed means to rescue children from sin and ruin? Prov. 23. 13. if thou beatest him, he shall not die. v. 14. thou shalt beat him, and deliver his soul from Hell. Prov. 22. 15. foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of correction shall drive it out. Prov. 29. 15. the rod and reproof give wisdome, but a child left to himself bringeth his Mother to shame: and in a word, it would be greatest folly and danger to Children, not to yeeld, and obedientially to hearken to such rebukes. Prov. 15. 8. A fool despiseth his Fathers instruction, and v. 10. Correction is grievous to him that forsaketh the way: and v. 32. He that refuseth instruction, despiseth his own soul.
To the second query, with what manner of This obedience must be obedience are children to obey Parents: I answer more briefly.
[Page 107] 1. With a kind of universall and unlimited obedience 1. Universall. falling under the compass of lawfull things: so Col. 3. 20. Children obey your Parents in all things, one as well as another, being all lawfull: there is no exception, or limitation made.
2. With a Sedulous obedience: Phil. 2. 22. Paul 2. Sedulous. alluding to this, saith of Timothy, as a Son with the Father he hath served with me in the Gospel, i. e. very diligently: so Jacobs sons followed their Fathers business diligently, sparing no pains to remove their flock hither, and thither, for his best advantage, Gen. 37. 17.
3. With a ready and cheerfull obedience. Gen. 3. Cheerfull. 37. 13. Come, I will send thee to thy brethren, saith Jacob to Joseph; here am I saith Joseph, he is as ready to do it, as his Father to command it. So in a like case David injoyned by his Father Jessai, 1 Sam. 17. 20. He ariseth early in the morning, and leaving his sheep with a keeper, he took and went as Jessai had commanded. Gen. 42. 2. Get you down into Egypt to buy us corn, saith Jacob to his Sons, v. 3. And Josephs ten brethren went down to buy corn in Egypt, and Chap. 47. 31. swear unto me, saith Jacob to Joseph, and he sware unto him: such ready obedience yeelded they to their Father.
4. With a resolute obedience. Children are not 4. Resolute. to be diverted from lawfull obedience to Parents, either by frowns, or flattering perswasions of others: if Jeremiah a man of God, will set before Rechabs Sons pots of wine, and bid them drink it, Jer: 35. 5. such a tempting and trying of them, will not prevail with them, vers. 6. but they said, we will drink no wine; for Jonadab the Son of Rechab, our Father, commanded us saying, you shall drink no wine, neither you nor your Sons for ever.
[Page 108] 5. With a conscientious obedience, namely to 5. Conscientious. parentall Authority as of God, and as to Gods command requiring it of you to Honour Father and Mother, with such Honour of obedience; and injoyning children to obey their parents in all tbings, Col. 3. 20.
To the second query, why children must give Reasons of it. this Honour of obedience to Parents, I answer also briefly: they must do it,
1. Because it is pleasing to God; Gal. 3. 20. 1. It is welpleasing to God. Children obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord. Its an incouragement to children, to do such or such things for Parents, when they know it will please them very well: but most of all when they understand, that God himself is well pleased therewith. God himself is very well pleased with filiall obedience to Parents, as seeing therein his own Image of Fatherhood Honoured; his own authority and command requiring this, attended and Honoured, and a ready way hereby made in children to all other obedience to the Lord himself: And who would not endevour that they might thus, at once, Crown the Lord himself, and their Parents, with their due Honour, and be crowned, not so much with parentall, as divine acceptance?
2. Because this is right, or just, or meet, Eph. 2. It is just and right. 6. 1. Children obey your Parents in the Lord, for this is right: in the Greek it is [...], just, due by the Law of God, of nature, and of nations: Its a due debt: children owe obedience to their Parents as a debt, and must be paying it all their dayes. Children who have received their whole man soul and body, instrumentally from their Parents, ow the service of both, in an obedientiall way to their lawfull commands. Its not a matter [Page 109] of liberty, or curtesie, but due debt, which is daily due to be paid in part. Justice which requireth to give every other person his due, requieth children to give Parents also their due, of which this is part, even filiall obedience.
3. Because manifold blessings and benefits do 3. Many blessing attend it. attend due and true filial obedience unto Parents. Children obey your parents in the Lord, Eph. 6. 1. & v. 2. Honour thy Father and thy Mother, and v. 3. that it may be well with thee, and that thou maist live long on earth. Giving this Honour of filiall obedience, as it is a means of long life, as Prov. 4. 4. 10. Keep my Commandements, saith David to Solomon, and live, and vers. 10. Hear O my Son, and receive my sayings, and the years of thy life shall be many: and as it is a means of bodily health, Pro. 4. 22. Parents lawfull and gracious commands observed by Children, are health to all their flesh: and sickly times often befall the yonger sort, as here with us, where filiall obedience and observance is too much wanting: But I say besides, that the Apostle inlargeth the benefit thereof in that expression, that it may be well with thee, namely not alone in matter of bodily health, but in that of name also, of estate, of family relations, of personall callings and occasions, of generall calling as Christians, and as members of the Church: yea also in those spirituall matters of their souls in the things and comforts of God and of his word, and seals and services, &c. The way to have body and soul to do well and prosper, yea the way to have God himself shining and smiling upon children, to have Gods blessing upon childrens reading, hearing and meditating of the word, to have God answering even their prayers, to have God ordering all things for good to them which [Page 110] befall them, to have God to be with them, and bless all they do take in hand, to do well by them in life and death; is to yeeld due and true obedience to Parents. Prov. 15. 5. is verified in obedientiall hearkning to Parents counsels or rebukes: the eare that heareth reproof, abideth among the wise. It is amonst the number of them, else that care or person would not hearken, but which is more, it abideth among them, such an one doth not apostatize from the company and condition of persons truly wise. I fear, if the bottom of the Apostasie of many promising professors now a daies were searched into, this would be found there, they were, or are disobedient children to their parents, but as for the obedient, God is so well pleased with them, that he thinks he can never deal well enough with them.
Now in the third place, we shall make use of 1. Use of reproof of childrens. this branch, even of siliall obedience, the use whereof serveth, 1. For reproof, and that first of children.
1. Of such who in shew express obedience to 1. Pretended obedience. your Parents commands, but in reality do it not; like the Son in the Parable, who when bid by his Father, to go and work in his Vineyard, he saith, I go Sir, but went not: Matth. 21. 30. Or if you do any thing, which for the matter of it is injoyned by your Parents, yet formally and properly its not filial obedience, but rather yeelding obedience to some lust of your own, which biddeth you do such and such things wch Parents enjoyn. As when a covetous lust will put you on to do your Fathers will and work, that you may have the gain of it, or the like: or if you do at length what Parents require in a better manner, yet it may abase you, that you did it not more readily, and seasonably, [Page 111] you first were too disobedient in your carriage, like the Son in the parable, that said at first he would not, Matth. 21. 28, 29. Afterward indeed he repented and went, and so at last did the will of his Father. But it was to him, and by proportion should be to you, a ground of penitent shame and sorrow, that at first you were so disobedient.
2. Of such children who are plainly disobedient 2. Disobedience to parents. to your Parents, and persist in it, or at least continue too long in it, without repentance for the same. Some there are, that when their Parents do even stoop somewhat below themselves, and not command so much, as intreat them to do this or that lawfull thing at their request, yet will boldly deny their parents desires, like the Elder Son in the Parable, who when his Father commeth out to him, and intreateth him to come in, will not come in, Luk. 15. 28, 29. Some when their Parents would have them of an honest calling, or course of life, as more fit for that, and such as may be more serviceable to God and men in it, yet will not be ruled, no they must take to some other course, that their foolish hearts like better, or else their Parents cannot be in quiet: like Adonijah, that contrary to God and his Father Davids mind, would needs be a King, when yet he was no way fitted for it, 1 King 1. Some will like those in Gen. 6. 2. be matching, but as themselves only foolishly fansie, and Parents cannot be at rest for them, but they must needs have such a one, like Sampson, Judg. 14. 2. He came and told his Father and Mother, saying, I have seen a woman in Timnath of the daughters of the Philistins, now therefore get her for me to wife: and when his Parents wisely and faithfully replyed, [Page 112] vers. 3. Is there never a daughter among all my people, that thou goest to take a wife of the uncircumcised Philistins? Sampson saith to his Father, get her for me, for she pleaseth me, or, is right enough in mine eyes. Some children are grown to such an height of disobedience, as they are grown stubborn, resolute & wilful in their disobedience, they are long habituated in it, they will not now be counselled, commanded, reproved, or corrected by Parents; they are above that, they are past that, they will be no longer curbed, or controlled, not they, by Mother or Father either: but little do you consider what a black brand you do carry herein, upon your selves, of your reprobation, and as a token thereof of your judiciall hardening. It was said of Esau, Esau have I hated, (or in my counsell rejected) Rom. 9. and what a grief of mind, was he to his Parents, by disobedient carriage in his matches? Gen. 26. When God hath a mind to ruinate Elies Sons, as men of Belial, whom he abhorred, 1 Sam. 2. 25. Its said, they hearkened not to the voyce of their Father (they would on in their course, say the old man, what he will to the contrary) because the Lord would slay them. Their counsels, commands, checks, rebukes, yea and corrections too are not hearkened to but all slighted, to make way for the fatall ruin of children devoted and destinated to saddest ends, either by the hand of some enemies, as in the case of Hophni and Phineas, 1 Sam. 2. 25. compar'd with Chap. 4. 11. or by the hand of civill justice, as Deut. 21. 20, 21. they bring out their stubborn Son, that will not be ruled by them, and he is stoned to death: sometimes by some more immediate hand of God, as that disobedient yong man, which would none of the voyce of his teachers, [Page 113] parents, or others, he hated their reproofs, &c. He is smitten by dreadfull horror of conscience inwardly: whence that dolefull mourning at last, when it is too late, Prov. 5. 11, 12, 13. and with lothsome diseases outwardly, he even rotteth above ground, and pineth away, his flesh and body is consumed: ibid. And hence we might give instances of very dreadfull examples of the lives and deaths of stubborn and disobedient children: and what other can be expected when they are in that black rowl of persons given up of God to a reprobate mind, Rom. 1. 28. He gave them up to a mind void of judgement, to do those things which are not convenient, being filled with all unrighteousness, v. 29, &c. disobedient to parents, v. 30.
2. It serveth to reprove parents, who any way 2. Of parents occasioning childrens disobedience. 1. By abusing their Authority. occasion disobedience in children.
1. By abusing their authority in giving out unjust commands to them, which the more provoketh and exciteth them to reject your authority, even in lawfull commands: such a parent was Laban, who put Leah his daughter upon that unlawfull course of deceiving her sisters spouse of his expected conjugall communion, and defiling her self and him by it, Gen. 29. 23. such a Parent was Saul, who would have his daughter break her conjugal covenant with David, and betake her self to an adulterous bed with Phalti, 1 Sam. 25. 44. such a parent was Herodias, who enjoyneth her daughter to make that bloody salvage request, for John Baptists head, Matth. 14. 8.
2. By your own rebellion against Gods commands, 2. By thelr rebellion against God. for which God in judgement leaveth children to be rebellious against you; as in the case of David, & Absalom, 2 Sam. 12. 9. thou hast despised [Page 114] the Commandement of the Lord, v. 10. Now therefore the sword shall not depart from thy house, v. 11. I will raise up evill against thee out of thine house, and fulfilled in Absaloms open rebellion, 2 Sam. 13.
3. By being too indulgent to them, when you 3. By sinfull indulgence perceive your children do not follow your charge in this or that particular: This made Hophni and Phineas the worse, that their Father Eli was so over indulgent to them, 1 Sam. 2. Hence Eli is blamed for it—ye have kicked at my sacrifice (saith God to Eli) Prov. 29. 15. the rod and reproof giveth wisdome, but a child left to himself (without seasonable reproof, or correction for his faults) bringeth his Mother to shame, namely by his desperate folly and disobedience: as the opposition of the later part of this proverb to the former sheweth.
A second use serveth for discovery, whether A second use is for examination. Marks of due obedience to parents. 1. If in way of repenting for former disobedience. children in that relation of children, did, or now do come up to that filial obedience required in the fifth Commandement; which is known to be so,
1. If in way of cordiall repenting for any former expressions of disobedience to Father or Mother, you did, or now do the rather, and the more obey your Parents injunctions. Like that Son in the Parable, Ma [...]. 21. 29. who repenting of that stubborn answer to his Father, in saying, when he bade him go, that he would not, but after he repented and went, and vers. 31. this of the two Sons, was he that did the will of his Father: or like the Prodigall Son, who in way of repenting of his sin against his Father, and against heaven, now offers his utmost service to him, which he shall injoyn him, and that in the meanest way of [Page 115] service, Luk. 15. 18, 19, 21. The Son said to his Father, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in thy sight, and am no more worthy to be called thy Son, make me as one of thy hired servants.
2. If when you are tempted to disobey your parents 2. If obeying when tempted to the contrary. commands, yet you overcome the temptations, & obey your parents lawfull injunctions notwithstanding, as the Rechabites, though urged to drink wine by Jeremi the Prophet, yet would not, & that in obedience▪ to Rechabs command, or because he had charged his Sons successively to look that they drank no wine, Jer. 35. 5, 6. 3. If doing it in matters unpleasing to the flesh.
3. If you that are children, in the relation of children, obey your Parents command, in matters unpleasing to flesh and blood, and which cross you in matters of carnall delights, preferments, profits, or ease, and which rather tend to mortification of the lusts of youth, to holy weanedness from the world, &c. thus it was with the injunctions first of Rechab to his next sons, who observed his command themselves, and left the same upon their next children, and they again upon theirs successively, unto the very time of Jeremiah, that they should live like strangers and pilgrims, in tents; forbearing the use of carnall delights, &c.
4. If Children are habituated in a way of filial 4. If habituated in it. obedience to your Parents lawfull commands. It is not some single act that way, nor some suddain pang, and fit of obedience, but like that of obedient Rechabites lasting all your dayes.
5. If in that relation of children, you do so wel relish 5. If propagating it to their children. filial obedience, that you endevour to propagate conscientious filiall obedience to your posterity, when you are Parents. So did these good Rechahites propagate filial obedience from Jehues time to Josiahs.
[Page 116] 6. If you are filially obedient to parents lawfull 6. If doing it [...]o parents in meaner conditions. injunctions, when your parents are in a far meaner estate, than you your selves are, Gen. 47. 12. Jacob was as one nourished by his Son Joseph, who was next to Pharaoh in place and honour, yet Joseph is as obedient to his Fathers command, as ever, when at home under his Fathers tuition, v. 31. swear now to me, saith Jacob to Joseph, and be sware to him. Mordecai was to his cousen Hester, as a Father to bring her up after her own Fathers death, Est. 2. 7. Ester is made great Ahasuerus his Queen, v. 16. and v. 20. Ester did the commandement of Mordecai, like as when she was brought up with him.
A third use is for exhortation. 1. To Parents. Third use of exhortation. 1. To parents to. further this due obedience: as, 1. By their own repentance and peace made with God.
Do you so carry it as that you may every way further this honour of obedience due to you from your children; for which end,
1. Make your peace with God through faith in Jesus Christ, and exercise of repentance, in regard of any former wayes of your disobedience to God, or unto parents, so far as you are privy and conscious to your selves thereof, Job 22. 21. Acquaint thy self with God, and be at peace with him, thereby good shall come to thee: what good? it followeth, v. 23. If thou return to the Almighty, thou shall be built up, (not only stored with estate again, but with children, as Ruth. 4. 11. Rachel and Leah built up Israels house; or filled it with a numerous posterity) and thou shalt put away iniquity from thy Tabernacle, or houshold, children, or servants, so Job 11. 14. Let not wickedness dwell in thy Tabernacle, that is not alone with thy self in particular, but not with any children, or servants in thy house; so that Job acquainting himself [Page 117] with God in the Mesiah, and repenting, shall not only have a numerous family of children restored to him, but when he hath them, shall remove the iniquity of children also, in their relation, (as is disobedience and irreverence, &c.) as well as that from himself, in his, or his servants, as theirs.
2. Be you exemplary in wayes of filial obedience, 2. By being examples of filial obedience to parents. and observance of your parents: David did not alone teach Solomon filial obedience, as Solomon saith of him, Prov. 4. 3, 4. I was my Fathers Son, and he taught me also saying, keep my Commandements and live, but v. 10, 11. He records other words of his Father, saying thus, I have taught thee in the way of wisdome, and so in this of filiall obedience, as vers. 4. I have led thee in the right paths: and how obedient a Son Solomon proved, let his works declare, in his exact observing all his Fathers mind, in that of building and furnishing of the Temple, 1 Chro. 22. and Chap. 29. with 2 Chro. 5. and 6. and in that solemn charge of his to him, touching exemplary justice upon Joah and Shimei, 1 King 2. 5, 6, 7, 8, 9. which he accordingly executed, v. 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36. 44, 45, 46. and in the great charge of his Father, to keep the Lords charge, &c. v. 3. and Chap. 3. 3. Solomon loved the Lord, walking in the statutes of David his Father. The Rechabites parents, which first yeelded filial obedience to their Father Rechab, and taught their children practically as well as preceptively filiall obedience, had a posterity successively by that means of parents doing the like from parent to child, famous some ages after for filiall obedience. 3. By inuring children to obedience to God.
3. Inure your children to wayes of obedience unto the Lord, & be you frequently curbing their [Page 118] disobedience to Gods commands. Abraham who was famous for the Lords attestation of his care to improve his authority this way, in laying his command upon his houshold, to walk in the way of the Lord, Gen. 18. 19. as he had an obedient houshold of his servants in the relation of a master, Gen. 14. 23, 24. Not one of them offers to plunder to the worth of a shooe-latchet, Abraham having vowed to the contrary; so had he as obedient a child to him, in the relation of a Father, who laid down his neck to the very block, is willingly bound to become Gods sacrifice at his Fathers command, Gen. 22. 9, 10. Jonadab who laid the weight of his parentall authority, upon his children, in matters savouring of an heavenly, weaned, and mortified Spirit, had a most obedient posterity. Parents are injoyned to lay out the weight of thelr authority this way, Deut. 32. 46. You shall command your children to do all the words of this Law. This was Davids practice, 1 Chro. 28. 9. And thou Solomon my Son, know thou the God of thy Father, and serve him with a perfect heart, &c. And so 1 King. 2. 3. and Prov. 4. 5, 6, 7. he said to me, get wisdome, get understanding, &c. Jos. 24. 25. I and my house will serve the Lord: Josuah dareth undertake it, God hath given Josuah experience, what parentall and masterlike commands also can do that way, to bring them under obedience and service to the Lord, and so to him also as a Father of the Family, injoyning, and requiring such serving of God.
4. Use holy wisdome in giving your parentall 4. By using pathetical words in giving out commands to them. commands to your children, namely in the most moving expressions, which may help on affectionate attendance and observance thereof: thus good Bathshebah, when she would draw Solomon to follow [Page 119] her gracious directions, even in his place of a King, to which he was devoted, see how she circleth him with her pathetical expressions? Prov. 31. 1. &c. The prophecy which his Mother taught him, v. 2. What my Son! and what the Son of my womb! and what the Son of my vowes! hence that parenthesis in Jacobs charge to his Son Joseph, Gen. 48. 7. And as for me, when I came from Padan Aram, Rachel (Josephs deer Mother) died in the Land of Canaan, in the way, when yet there was but a little way to come to Ephrath, and I buried her there in the way of Ephrath, &c. He would in a holy wise, insinuate, and get within Josephs heart hereby, And then his eares and heart will be open to all he hath to give him in charge.
5. Do you readily yeeld to the just desires even 5. By yeelding to childrens just desires. of your children, and it will notably prevail with your children most readily to yeeld to any just commands of yours: As Caleb who giveth to his daughter Achsah the upper and nether springs at her request, Iud. 1. 15. As it was good counsell given to that Father of the Common-weal, Rehoboam, 2 Chro. 10. 3, 4, 7. to be kind to his people, to please them, & speak good words to them, in way of answer to their request, and they would be his servants for ever. So is it in this case of Fathers of Families: wise and seasonable condescendencies sometimes in parents to children, It winneth their hearts, and ingageth them to constant obedience.
6. Do you also sometimes hearken to the good 6. By hearkening sometimes to childrens good advice. advice, which even your children do seasonably, and in a suitable manner give to you, and this also will exceedingly win your childrens hearts to an obedientiall submission to your just commands. Thus did Terab, Abrahams Father, yeeld [Page 120] to Abrahams advise, in the matter of his remove from Ʋr, in Mesopotamia, to Haram, towards Canaan, as Act. 7. 1, 2, 3, 4. compared with Gen. 11. 31, 32. and 12, 1. sheweth. So did Rahabs parents follow her advice; they repaired to her house when Jericho was besieged by Josuah, and being there, they stirred not out of dores, according as the spies had Counselled Rahab her self, to look that it might be so done, Josh. 2. 18, 19. compared with Chap. 6. 23. 2. Exhortation to Children to yeeld such obedience.
2. This use serveth for exhortation to Children, that you would be stirred up to the duty of honour of filiall obedience to your parents: else all other outward expressions of respect to them, are but bare Complements: this is in speciall sort a reall honouring of them. As it is in the children of God in reference to their heavenly Father. It is more than all formalities of offering sacrifices to him, or the like: as he said to Saul, 1 Sam. 15. 22. Behold, to obey is better then sacrifice, and to harken then the fat of Ramms. As the contrary, disobedience is as iniquity and Idolatry, verse 23. So is it in the case of the Children of men; their obedience to Parents is all in all; their disobedience and stubbornesse to Parents is vilest iniquity.
Now the better to further Children in giving this honour of filial obedience, we shall Motives to obedience to Parents. propound 1. Some motives. 2. Some helps to it. As for motives thereunto, let it be considered,
1. That the Lord himself doth highly honour such as honour their parents, by honour of obedience, 1. God and Men honour such as yeeld it. and he ordereth for them speciall honour from others, Prov. 1. 8, 9. The instruction of a [Page 121] Father, and the Law of a Mother harkened unto, (he saith) shall be an ornament to a Sons head, and as precious chaines about his neck, a badg and pledg of honour in the eyes of his people, Prov. 13. 18. He that hearkneth to reproof (of a Parent especially) shall be honoured. Hence God causeth so honourable a Record to be kept, in Scripture, of the Acts of obedience to Parents, in Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, and others: Memorable is that, Jer. 35. 18, 19. Where God chargeth Jeremiah to tell the Rechabites, Because you have obeyed the commandement of Jonadab your Father, and kept all his precepts, and done according to all that he hath commanded you; therefore thus saith the Lord, the God of Israel, Jonadab the Son of Rechab shall not want a man to stand before me for ever: namely so long as that state and Church of Judah should stand, as they should not he rooted out, (as Jer 31. 36. There is the like phrase, in a like sense) so they should be be honourably imployed, according to that phrase in a like sense, Jer. 33. 17, 18.
2. That the Lord sometimes taketh occasion 2. God manifesteth great things to such in such a way. to manifest such speciall grace to children, whilest in this way of filial obedience, as, either was not at all, or not in that measure shewed to them before: Observable is that in Jacob, whose journey to Padan Aram, is put upon the account of his filial obedience, even by his malicious Brother Esau, Gen. 28. 7. now as he in his obediential way, journyed from Bershebah towards Haran, v. 10, 11. there he seeth, the ladder set upon the earth, and the top of it reached to heaven, and behold, the Angels of God ascending and descending upon it; and behold the Lord stood above it, and said, I am the God of Abraham, and the God of Isaac, thy Father, the [Page 122] land whereon thou liest will I give it to thee, and to thy seed, v. 12, 13. and vers. 14. He promiseth to multiply his seed, and that in him and his seed all the families of the earth shall be blessed, and vers. 15. Behold I am with thee, saith God, and I will keep thee in all places whither thou goest, and will bring thee again to this land, for I will not leave thee, untill I have done that which I have spoken to thee of, and vers. 16, 17. Jacob awoke, and said, Surely the Lord is in this place, and I knew it not, this is none other then the house of God, this is the gate of heaven. Never had Jacob, that we finde, before this time so glorious a manifestation of the promised Messiah, to be God and man in one person, as that one Ladder with its top reaching to heaven, and its bottome on earth; to be as a blessed Medium and Mediator, by which God and Man, heaven and earth should be joyned together, as by a Ladder set on earth, yet reaching up to heaven; to be he by whom the Angels minister unto us, and by whom all graces and spirituall blessings descend upon us, and our hearts and spirits, our prayers, praises, and other holy services, yea, and our whole persons one day, ascend up to Heaven: Never had Jacob such glorious promises of blessing upon him and his seed before; Never was he in such a Corner of Heaven before: And who then would not be incouraged to filial obedience, and to be found in the way there of, wherein others have found more of God and Christ than ever before?
3. That Gods speciall presence and blessing 3. Gods special presence and blessing is with such. is with you in a way of filial obedience to your parents: so in this Scripture mentioned, Jacob had Gods gracious promise of his presence with him, and preservation of him, in all places whither he [Page 123] went, and that his seed with him should be blessed. 4. Promises made to children with their parents come by that meanes to be fulfilled.
4. That it tendeth to the ratification and accomplishment of the promises made to you in your godly parents. As to Abrahams children in case of their obedience of his godly commands, Gen. 18. 19. I know Abraham, that he will command his Children and household after him: And they (in obedience to his command) shall keep the way of the Lord, that the Lord may bring upon Abraham (even in his children after him) that which he hath spoken of him, even his promises respecting him and his seed. Deut. 32. 46. Set your hearts to all the words which I testifie among you this day, which you shall command your children to observe to do all the words of this Law, vers. 47. For this is not a vain thing for you: because it is your life, and through this thing you shall prolong your daies in the land which yee go to possess. Albeit God had made so many promises of their injoyment of Canaan, and many blessings of grace, protection, peace, and the plenty there upon them and their posterity, yet the meanes of accomplishment of all must be,
1. That parents themselves must set themselves to obey all Gods Commands.
2. They must lay their authority upon their Children, to require of them also obedience to all Gods Commands.
3. The Children, in obedience to their parents commands, under God, they must observe to do all the words of that Law. 1 King. 2. 1, 2, 3. David chargeth his Son Solomon saying, Keep the charge of the Lord thy God, to walk in all his waies, &c. that (by keeping this charge of God, as given in charge by me thy Father according to God) thou maiest prosper in all thou doest, and vers. 4. that [Page 124] the Lord may confirm his word which he spake concerning me, (namely in respect to my Children) saying, If thy Children take heed to their way to walk before me in truth with all their heart and soul, there shall not fail thee, said he, a man on the throne of Israel.
5. That your examples of filial obedience, in 5. It will be a meanes of the like obedience in other Children. you, may be a meanes to work somewhat, at least, upon other Children, yea, even upon disobedient ones, as Jacobs did upon Esau, Gen. 28. 6, 7, 8. He never considered his disobedient course of matching with Canaanites against his parents minde: But when he saw that Isaac his father had blessed Jacob, and sent him away to Padan Aram, to take him a Wife from thence, and not to take a Wife of the Daughters of Canaan, and that Jacob obeyed his Father and Mother, and was gone to Padan Aram, and Esau seeing the Daughters of Canaan pleased not Isaack his father, vers. 9. Then went Esau to Ishmael, and took Mahalath the daughter of Ishmael, Abrahams Son to wife; Now he thought his matching thus unto the family of Abraham, might better please his Father, and so did it.
6. In that else, in a contrary way of dishonour 6. The contrary will expose the very place where they are to Gods curse. of parents, you will, what in you lieth, expose the very place where you are to Gods curse. Hence that of Mal. 4. 6. It is prophesied, that by the presence and blessing of God in John Baptists ministry, parents hearts which were ever alienated from their stubborn and wicked children, and theirs as much from their good parents, not induring to be at their Beck, the Children shall be so effectually changed to holy obedience to God, and them according to God, that the Children shall win parents hearts, and the parents shall have their Childrens hearts (lest otherwise) I come, saith God, [Page 125] and smite the earth with a curse: And oh that all Children would consider this, & become obedient according to God, lest otherwise God be provoked to blast and crush the very place where they are, as he is wont to blast that very place and country where dishonour and disobedience to parents becommeth the common and prevailing sin thereof.
Now for the helps unto honour of filial obedience, Helps to it. they are such as these,
1. Take heed of such things as hinder filial obedience, and breed and feed stubbornesse in you 1. Avoid all hinderances to it. to your parents; such as self-conceitednesse, self-willednesse, over weaned conceit of what Children have formerly done at their Parents command, curiosity, discontent, ambition, envy at fellow Brethren and Sisters, bad company and counsell, poring upon parents meanesse, infirmities, failings, and the like, of which you may see more in the 2. Chapter, in the helps there proposed to further Children in giving that honour in generall which is due to parents.
2. Labour to see the evils of your former disobedient 2. See the evill of former disobedience. carriages towards your parents, and to bewayle the same, and humbly to confess the same, as to God, so to your wronged parents, if yet living: As in the Parable of the prodigall youngster, who cast off the yoak of his Father: when he commeth to himself, and is now sensible of that mad course and spirit of his, he goeth to his Father, and confesseth it, with that aggravation, that he hath so sinned against him, that he is no more worthy to be called his Son, Luk. 15. 17, 18, 19, &c. so should you do in the case of your disobedient carriages to parents, and as you also will then be willing to yeeld to the meanest acts of obedience, [Page 126] to be as hired servants.
3. Make an holy and fruitfull improvement 3. Improve Gods Word & providences which in speciall awaken thereunto. both of any speciall words of God in the ministery or Scriptures, and other good books tending to quicken you up to filial obedience to your parents, and of any speciall afflictions, which you meet with in a way of disobedience to parents: for God useth to be breathing in the word sometimes in Childrens hearts, obediential workings and purposes, as experience witnesseth, and as that place Mal. 4. 6. even now opened, sheweth: yea, and in his providences also crossing stubborn and dissolute Children in their way, he giveth them a loud call, to alter their course of disobedience and dissoluteness: like that penury and misery which God made use of to awaken the dissolute Son in the parable, from his course, and to bring him back again under his Fathers government, Luke 15. 16, 17, 18. Onely when at any time God is stirring that way in your hearts occasionally, either from any awakening word or providence of his, look to it that you do not stifle those movings, nor suppresse those workings of heart, nor procrastinate and put off the real practising of such counsels of God, as at such times are presented to you, but forthwith, without further delay, set about the course directed and hinted, and urged upon you, lest otherwise, as too often it falleth out, those good motions in your hearts, not being attended and cherished, they die and come to nothing, but rather like that dissolute Son in the parable, so soon as ever he was moved inwardly to consider his perishing condition in the way he was and had been, since he wretchedly brake away from under his Fathers watch & rule, and how well it might be with him to return to [Page 127] his Fathers house, in Luke 15. 17, 18, 19. He resolveth of his course, that he will home again, and submit himself to his Father, and vers. 20, 21. his purposes died not, but presently he performed what he so had purposed, and doe you likewise. That example of the Psalmist is imitable in this case of Children, as well as in other cases, who saith, Psal. 119. 59. I thought on my waies, and turned my feet unto thy testimonies: and vers. 60. to shew that he did lose no time therein, he saith, I made hast and delayed not to keep thy Commandements.
4. Yeeld to your parents their due honour 4. Yeeld to Parents honour of repect and reverence. both of respect and of reverence, and you will assuredly yeeld them their due honour of obedience; My Son, saith Solomon, (as a Father also to his Child) give me thine heart; and let thine eyes observe my waies, Prov. 23. 26. If a Father have his Childs heart, love, and awe, he hath been undoubtedly at his command: as, if Children of God indeed, then loving and standing in awe of him, and if so, then surely keeping his commandements, then departing from forbidden evils, so is it in the case of the Children of men, loving and reverencing their parents, they are ready to obey them, they are fearfull to offend them.
5. Do you herein also, as well as in other acts of honour of Parents, set before your eyes 5. Herein also good examples; and the evils of the contrary. the examples of persons eminent for filial obedience; as Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, and Jesus Christ, who also was subject to his Parents, Luke 2. 51. Yes set before you the contrary miserable lives and deaths of Children that were disobedient and stubborn to their Parents, and see if by the blessing of God upon such meditations, God will not exceedingly quicken you up to filial obedience, [Page 127] and shame you or deter you from disobedience to Parents. God maketh accout that exemplary punlshing of one disobedient Son, even by mans hand, should cause all other to hear and fear, Deut. 21. 20, 21, This our Son will not obey the voice of his Father or of his Mother: and all the men of the City shall stone him with stones, that he die; and all Israel shall hear and fear.
CHAP. VI. Of Honour of Recompence or thankefulness due to Parents.
WE have handled three branches and parts of direct honour of parents injoyned in the fifth Commandement: namely honour of respect, of reverence, and of obedience. We come now to the fourth, and that is honour of Recompence, for so honour is taken in Scripture language, for honour of recompence, as was shewed in the first Chapter. Observe then as a fourth branch of the poynt in generall; that children are to honour their parents with the honour of thankfulnesse or Honour of recompence to be given to Parents, proved. thankful recompence. Christ himself ratifieth this as commanded of God, and as injoyned also virtually in the fifth Commandement, and that if a Son do nothing for his Father and his Mother in their need, they break that Commandement, and such as are—instruments to hinder them from it, they make the word of God of none effect, Mark 7. 10. Moses said, honour thy Father and thy Mother, vers. 12. and ye suffer a man no more to do ought for his Father or Mother, vers. 13. making [Page 129] the word of God of none effect, 1 Tim. 5. 4. But if any Widdow have Children, or Nephewes, let them, that is the Adult Children of such ancient widdowes, learn to shew piety; (or kindnesse) at home, and to requite their parents: that this is the meaning, is evident from the scope of the Apostle, who is speaking of what Widdowes are to be honoured and owned by the Church, imployed and maintained by the Church, viz. such as are Widdowes indeed, vers. 3. namely as vers. 5. expoundeth, every way desolate, not only in respect of want, or deprivall of an husband to provide for her, but of Children or near kindred to take care of her, or minister supply to her. As for any other Widdow, as vers. 4. expresseth, who hath Children or Nephewes to provide for her, the Apostle would not have the Church charged with them, but injoyneth it from God as the Childrens duty (if such be living) or near kinsfolkes duty, to shew piety or kindness to them, and especially the Children, they must learn to shew piety to them at home, and to requite their parents. And its observable, that the Holy Ghost saith not, let them only shew piety & requite Parents, but let them learn to do it: there is an holy skill and art of doing it, to know wherein, and how, and when, and for what ends to do it: every one knoweth not the right art of doing it. And he that hath any holy skill that way, may be a daily proficient in it, there is some mystery in it, and it would be learned by all: every one must be teachable, and willing, and desirous to understand his duty this way, and to know it more and more: and the more each one practiseth, according to the Rules of God, this commendable art, the better artist, no doubt, he will prove therein.
I shall endevour, according to that small measure which I have received, to give some few directions, which may be of some use this way.
Let us then first consider wherein, or in what way this filial gratefull recompence is to be made to Parents.
2. Why it is to be made.
3. Make such use of it, as may both discover any thing contrary to it, or any hinderance in it: and likewise what may any way further either the Theorie or Practice of it. In all which we shall make much use of that fundamentall notion (as I may call it) which the Holy Ghost giveth us for this end, in the very phrase he useth to express the duty it self, 1 Tim. 5. 4. [...], & vicem rependere, as Beza and others render it, parentibus; or to progenitours, as it is in the Greek: whether next parents, or Grand-Fathers, and Grand-Mothers, or the like: there must be a thankful retaliation, as much as may be, though perfectly and fully it cannot be; for parents have given their children their beings (under God,) and their very life and existence: which the children can never do to them; but as much as may be they must repay them like for like. Touching the first thing propounded, in what way children must recompence parents; I answer.
1. In way of gratefull serving of them, and It consisteth in childrens 1. Gratefull serving of their parents. their good, as thereunto called of God: Paul alludeth to this in Phil. 2. 22. for as a Son with the Father hath he served with me in the Gospell, Mal. 3. 17. his Son that serveth him. In case especially of parents meanness, (as with us generally in New England) there is need, that some of their children at least should even work for them. Jesus Christ, when on earth, he wrought hard with [Page 131] his reputed Father, for the maintenance of his poor Mother, Mark 6. 3. Is not this the Carpenter, say they, the Son of Mary? And I say, in way of grateful serving of parents, they must do that in a way of gratitude, which their parents, in way of parentall love, did for them; they must vicem reddere, (as I said the phrase is in Tim. 5. 4.) give like for like. How did parents work and labour Working for them out of love to them. for them? Answ. 1. They did it with much tender respect and affection to children, for love of them rather than themselves; they had many a bowel-pang, and thought of their children, carrying them on to, and in their toyles and labours. Alas, thought they, many and many a time, if we take not such and such pains, if we use not such and such diligence in our callings, our poor helpless babes, our poor children will want this and that for the back, and for the belly, &c. As Jacob said, Gen. 30. 30. when shall I be for mine own house also? He looketh not so much to provide for himself, as for his wives as an husband, for his children as a Father: children do you like for like. If servants in some cases will continue serving their Masters, because they love them, whence that boring of such a servants ear, Exod. 21. 5, 6. then do you children much more, out of respect to your parents: this serving of parents, and labouring for them, and that out of respect to them, is all but due debt on your part. You have reason to look backward to what is past, and lyeth already in banck on your parents part, and what Bils or Bonds on their part, which requir greater disbursments this way than ever you can make, if you should serve them all your daies. And if you pay in now a little, and then a little, as you are able, and as your parents needs call for it, [Page 132] yet may you very well have low thoughts of all such petty payments, as yet are so exceedingly short of that vast sum of service, and ministration, which is due to your parents.
2. Parents did what service of love they did for their children, with a great deal of Alacrity With alacrity. and freeness, with heart and good will (as we use to say) Children, do you the like for them; even servants are to serve their Masters with good will, Eph. 6. 7. and to do what they do for them, ex animo, heartily, Col. 3. 23. Much more should children do so, in what you do for your parents. Farents [good hearts!] they did nothing they did for children, grudgingly, though never so harsh to flesh and blood, though very toilsome, no, it never deared them (as we say) knowing that their poor children should have the benefit of it, more wayes than one. Oh that children would think of it, and do like service of love for them; then would there never be such grumbling with children, as there is with too many, as if every thing were too much, or too harsh, which they are put to do for supply of parents wants. Parents never needed urging, or forcing, no nor their childrens calling upon them, to be doing for them and their good; let children do like for like: let none, parents, or others, need to urge you with many arguments, or compel you by blowes or mulcts, to be doing this compensatory service, but let it be as a very naturall fruit, arising freely, from an innate principle and root within. Parents needed no eye of man, of their children, or of others, to look after them, and see that they were diligent in their service of love for their children, no, when none were by, as well as when any were present, still they plied it hard for the supply of their childrens [Page 133] wants, for their childrens welfare: let children do like for like; very servants to Masters, should not do eye service, Col. 3. 22. and it would be a shamefull and loathsome thing most of all in children, to do eye service for parents.
3. Parents were constant, and unwearied, in Constantly and unweariedly. their labours, for their childrens good; they thought nothing they did, or could do, too much, or scarce enough, for their childrens good; Oh that children would but give like for like to parents! then would there never be such counting upon so much, and so much, which children have done for parents; Many a poor honest parent hath even worn out themselves, and wasted and exhausted their very strength, in their service of love for their children; and it would be a monstrous thing, if children should not now do all that ever they can to maintain these their decayed, decrepit, exhausted parents; I had almost said servants.
4 Parents in their service of love, on behalf of their children, condescended to meanest offices, and imployments, such indeed they were, especially when their children were little, were diseased, or many wayes bodily distempered and ill at ease, that none else but tender hearted parents, Fathers and Mothers, would have done for them; let children do like for like for parents, as they may have use, or stand in need of them. As in the parable (oft made use of in this discourse) the Son, when come to rights, he was willing to be as his Fathers servant, yea the meanest of servants, as his hired servant, Luke 15. 17, 18, 19. 2. In being a comfort to them in their sorrows and sufferings.
A second way of such grateful recompencing of parents, is, by being a comfort to them against their sorrows, and sufferings. As when parents [Page 134] meet with any sad losses, crosses, reproaches, persecutions for Christs sake, when exiled, imprisoned, or the like; let children cheer them up all they can, Gen. 5. 29. Lamech called his Sons name Noah, saying, this Son shall comfort us, concerning our work, and toil of our hands, because of the ground which the Lord hath cursed. Let children be as so many Noahs, comforts, and comforters, against whatsoever miseries, or calamities which may befall their parents, Ruth 4. 15. this shall be a restorer of thy life, and a nourisher of thy old age; the grand-child Boaz, must be his grand-mothers cherisher, succourer, and supporter, under God, against all her faintings, sinkings, and troubles of her elder times; when that sad news of Josephs supposed death came to Jacobs eares, All his Sons and daughters rose up to comfort him; Children are branches of their Parents, as of a Vine, Psal. 128. 3. (thy wife shall be as the fruitfull Vine by thy house side) whose branches yeeld such grapes, such fruit, from which choycest wine is made, whereby mans heart is cheared, quickned and inlarged: let children then yeeld such chearing, quickening, strengthning and inlarging fruit to their parents, when sad, when their Spirits are ready to fail, and sink within them, through troubles inward or outward. As other wine, or fruit of the Vine, is for those that are of a heavy heart, Prov. 31. 6. So children, as children, as receiving a being from their parents, as of the Vine of which they came, are to yeeld comforting fruit, especially to their sorrowfull parents; children should carry it so, and be such to sad and suffering parents, as they may make up many other losses, and crosses, to them. As it was said of Ruth (whose story is often, occasionally, made use of, in this discourse) [Page 135] Ruth 4. 15. for thy daughter-in-Law, which loveth thee, which is more to thee than seven Sons, hath born him. Naomi had lost her two dear Sons, yea but Ruth is such a succourer, and supporter, and comforter to her, that she is instead of many Sons that way to her. Eve loseth her hopefull Son Abel, and her wound is the greater, in that his brother Cain murthered him; yea but Seth is given her, as one appointed of God to be another seed to her, instead of Abel, whom his brother Cain slew, Gen. 4. 25. she looketh for all that good and comfort from him, which Abel might have ministred to her; and so doubtless she found it made good to her; children, in this also, must vicem rependere, pay and give in like for like. Ah the bowels of parents towards children! when any evill, or calamity befalleth them, when any way ill at ease, when sad through-outward, or inward troubles, or pressures, they put their souls in their souls stead, they would not suffer them to lie grieving, and wasting themselves with grief, if with all their wisdom, and grace and ability they had, inward, or outward, they could redress the same: when their children were litle, such comforts, and cordials were parents unto them, and when their children are adult, they were the same to them: let children then repay like for like to their grieved afflicted parents; If to him that is melting away with trouble (as that Hebrew word in Job 6. 14. signifieth) such expressions of sympathy should be shewed from a friend to his friend, much more from a child to a parent; if a brother be born for adversity, Prov. 17. 17. Is it not one end of a childs being born from his parents, to be a help, and succour to them in adversity? Children should be as eyes to their dim-sighted parents, as strength to [Page 136] them when weak, Feet to them when lame, nourishers to them when in need of meat and refreshment, sweet melody to them to make their very hearts dance within them, and a very flaffe to their age, as it is said, that Scipio Africanus was unto his Father. If Christ himself account so of each of his Disciples, who do the will of his Father, to be his Brother, Sister, and Mother, not alone in the faithfull respects and service of the love of such to him-ward, but in respect of his own respects and services of love, succour, and sympathy towards them, as of a child towards a Mother, and of a Brother or Sister towards a Brother or Sister, especially when afflicted, Esay 63. 9. and Mark 3. 35. It will be a Christ-like part, and an Image of his indeared, and self-denying respects to us, who have done to him any services, and offices of love, that gracious children, be as children indeed, in way of holy recompences, by all due respects, succour and sympathy of love, to their afflicted Mothers or Fathers, for all those greater services, succours, and sympathies of their love towards them.
3. Let children recompence parents by being 3. In being very sollicitous of parents good and safety in hazzards and straits. effectually sollicitous of their parents outward safety and good in times of danger and straits; thus David, fearing the malicious rage of Saul against his parents, for his sake, secureth them with the King of Moab, whom he requested, saying, 1 Sam. 22. 3. Let my Father and Mother, I pray thee, come forth and be with you, till I know what God will do for me, and vers. 4. he brought them before the King of Moab, and they dwelt with him all the time that David was in the hold. So Jesus Christ, that unparalleld example of thankful recompence of parents, see Joh. 19. 26, 27. how sollicitous [Page 137] he is, and what effectual order he taketh for his poor Mother, even then, when he hung bleeding upon the Cross [when Jesus saw his Mother, and the disciple standing by whom he loved, he saith unto his Mother. Woman behold thy Son, then he saith to the Disoiple, Behold thy Mother] or take her, & use her, love her, tender her, look to her, do for her, as for thy own Mother; and so indeed John understood Christs speech, and therefore it is added, [And from that hour that Disciple took her unto his own home.] When a Lion intercepteth Sampson, and his Father and Mother, in their journey, Judg. 14. 5, 6. Sampson interposeth twixt danger and his parents, adventureth his own life, and slaieth the Lion; when danger was impending upon Jericho, and a bloody storm was gathering over it, Rahab will not be saved alone, but must have her Parents and Kindred also preserved, Josh. 2. 13. That ye will save alive my Father and my Mother, and my Brethren and Sisters, and all that they have, and deliver our lives from death. And indeed parents are the head of the Family; and as it is in the body natural, every member is ready to rescue the head from hurt, and rather expose it self to hazzard, than indanger the head: so should it be in the body oeconomicall; the children especially should take all effectuall care that may be, to preserve their parents from hazzard, or harms; like those young men of Catana (of whom we spake before) which adventured the very flames, to preserve their parents from burning. Scipio Africanus, when the consul Scipio Cornelius his Father, had almost lost the day to Hannibal, and was now both sorely wounded, and surrounded by the enemy, he being then but 17 years old, boldly and undauntedly breaketh through the surrounding [Page 138] enemy, and rescueth his Father from that danger; as Livy reporteth; young Manlius Son to Lucius Manlius, a young man of rare abilities, and sit for publique services, but put by his Father to live an obscure life, in too mean imployments, for which amongst other faults his Father was to be impeached by Pomponius the Tribune, which young Manlius perceiving, he repaireth early to the Tribunes Chamber, who supposing he came to help on the intended impeachment of his Father, he caused all to depart the room, but young Manlius having a sword privily under his coat, threatned the Tribune with present death, unless he would swear to desist wholly from prosecution of his Father, and as Valerius Maximus reporteth, he did so, and so rescued his Father from that danger, overlooking all unkind passages mentioned of his Father towards him; when the Son of Craesus, who was formerly dumb, saw a Persian Souldier ready to run him thorow, though to him unknown who he was, it is said, that this young man that for a time had lived mute, for himself, then for the safety of his Father he obtained power to speak, for he cryed out to the Persian Soldier: Oh do not kill King Craesus my Father, as also Val. Max. l. 5. reporteth. Such strange effects even in poor Pagans hath their sollicitous care of their parents safety produced; and let not the children of Christians be behind hand therein. Herein also must children vicem reddere, pay and give in like for like. Oh the many sollicitous thoughts, and most serious endeavours of parents, about their childrens safety, and outward good, when time was! when they were but in any likely-hood of any harm come to them, when they were little, if they were but missing a while from [Page 139] home, and their parents not knowing where they were, like Joseph and Mary, when Jesus being then 12 years old was missing, they sought him sorrowing, Luke 2. 48. So have dear parents many a time done the like for their children; if looking but a little more pale than usual, or not eating their meat, as at other times, Ah the fears, and heart-akes of tender-hearted parents about them, lest they should fall sick: or if any way hurt, or in pain, or sick, Oh the sorrowful dayes and nights, which parents that while pass over, fearing lest they should miscarry, and how many castings about, and contrivings, and inquiries are made by parents, what way, or course, or means might be seasonably used, which is most likely to ease, or heal, or revive their dear children, and to rescue them from the Jawes of death; let children repay unto parents like for like. How many hazzards, how many sufferings, have parents formerly exposed themselves unto, for childrens good and safety? Like Moses his parents, Heb. 11. 23. through faith hiding Moses, when an infant, from the mischief of Pharaohs Butchery, not fearing the Tyrants bloody edict, which was, that each male child of the Israelites should be slain; or like David, who understanding that wife and children, and all are captived by the Amalekites, he will adventure a thousand hazzards, but he will rescue them. Many a tender-hearted Mother will expose her self to be some way mischiefed, by a bear, or bull, or dog, or the like, to save and rescue her child from being hurt by any of them, when they are in imminent danger thereof; She will be ready to thrust her tender hand into the very fire, to pull or snatch out her little child, from being burnt or scorched by it. Now let children repay them like for like.
[Page 140] 4. Let children, in way of recompence, improve 4. In improving their utmost interests in God or men fot their good. their best interests either in God, for their good, inward, or outward, through exercise of their faith in prayer, or otherwise for that end; or in men, by intreaties, or otherwise, to further the same parentall good. As Hester did for her Unckle Mordecai, who had been a very Father to her, Hester 2. 7. she sendeth him word, Chap. 4. 16. that she and her maids will solemnly fast (and consequently pray too, on his, and his peoples behalf) and so I will (saith she) go in to the King, which yet is not according to the Law, and if I perish, I perish; she will then improve her utmost interest in heaven and earth, come what will come of it, but she will, if possible, help out Mordecai and the rest, at this dead lift. So Joseph, he improved his interest in Pharaoh for his Father Jacobs welfare, Gen. 47. 1. he told him, that his Father, and all his, and all he had were come, and were in the Land of Goshen, &c. upon which Pharaoh, v. 6. biddeth Joseph to place them there. Rahab improved her interest, not alone in the spies, to procure her parents and kinreds safety and welfare, as well as her own, Josh. 2. 12, 13. but in the Lord himself also, for the same end; for this action and success is ascribed also to Rahabs Faith, in Heb. 11. 31. with 5. In supplying their outward wants: yet so as it be honourably, plentifully, readily, and freely, to their content, out of the very best, and in some cases before themselves. Josh. 2. We heard but now also what improvement David made in the King of Moab, on behalf of his parents, and what use Christ the Son of David made of his interest in John the Apostle, for his Mother; verily, good parents did as much with God and men too, many and many a time, on the behalf of their children, as might be shewed in Scripture examples, and children cannot do less than repay unto them like for like.
5. [Which especially we shall presse, in this part of the discourse.]
Let children in way of gratefull recompence, communicate to their parents, of the blessings of this life, which God vouchsafeth them, according as their parents at any time may need the same. Paul in 1 Tim. 5. 4. doth in speciall sort look at this, as one way of gratefull requitall of parents: when, as for instance, the childrens Mother is some poor Ancient helpless widdow, one that might have charged the Church, but that God had given her Children, as well as Nephews, and they in the first place must learn the gratefull art of maintaining her, and of supplying of such a Mother-widdows wants; for which end mind we the Apostles words: [But if any widdow have children or Nephews; (not let her, as if speaking of a Mothers duty to children or kindred, but) let them learn (as speaking of the children firstly, and nextly of the Nephews) to shew kindness at home, and to requite their parents. The word [...], is in the plurall number, and so not agreeing with [...] the widdow, which is the singular, but with [...] children rather, being plurall; which clearly evinceth, that the scope of the place is to shew, not what is the Mother-widdows duty to their children, but what is the childrens duty to the Mother-widdow: namely as vers. 16. To relieve the Mother-widdows; and by the light of the word, [...] used for relieving parents, v. 16. and that in v. 4. [...] used for requiting parents, we may have much help, to clear this particular now in hand; the word [...] signifieth let him abundantly supply their wants, or let him minister enough to them, or what is sufficient for them, or that which is to just content; according also, as in Greek Authors that word is used; but I forbear instances. In Scripture the simple verb [Page 142] [...] is used, Joh. 14. [...]. for [it sufficeth] shew us the Father, and [...] [it sufficeth] and 2 Cor. 12. 9. my grace [...] is sufficient for thee; and Matth. 25. 9. lest [...] there be not enough for us and you. In Heb. 13. 5. [...] is, [Let us be content with what we have;] and the like use of it is in other Scriptures; and this word used in 1 Tim. 5. 16. for the Churches relief of their officed widdows, sheweth that it must be honourable: for so in v. 3. Its said: Honour them that are widdows indeed. It is then such a relief as is in honorem, in way of honour of the widdows; and if each good and christian child [...] must in such sort relieve his Mother-widdow, then they must do it honourably, or in honour of them, as a part of this, Honour thy Father and thy Mother, in an honourable way; yea they must do it abundantly, sufficiently, and to their just content, but more happily of these by and by, in the manner of doing it. Hitherto also some interpreters refer that, 1 Tim. 5. 8. who so provideth not for his own, and especially them of his own house, hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel; as a threat, and so forcible argument, to sway, that such should not be maintained upon the Churches charge, which may be maintained by their own; referring this, not so much to the wanton widdows, which waste that which should maintain them and theirs; as to the children of their widdow-Mothers, whose children should take care to provide for them, as their own, lest they incur this sad censure, of persons denying that faith which they do profess, and of persons, who are worse than infidels. And here the force of [...] taketh place. Parents took paines and care, night and day, and all that ever Gods providence otherwise cast in upon [Page 143] them, all still was, that their house, especially children, might be comfortably and sufficiently provided for, and that to their just content: as Father Jacob said, Gen. 30. 30. When shall I provide for my own house? Let children then, in parents shiftless conditions, vicem rependere, take their turn of repayment of like for like to Parents. Parents, according to their childrens needs and wants, and their own ability, did supply their children with Food, Rayment, Physick, Housing, Lodging, Attendance, and the like, In sickness as well as health. In all their bodily ayles and infirmities, their persons and estates were subservient to them; yea sometimes when through infirmity they were froward, and distempered in their spirits; let children do the like for parents; let them provide for their own parents especially, what is meet for them in all respects. Parents did seasonably provide all needfull supplies for children, and did not procrastinate, but took the first opportunity to do it for them; let children do as much for parents, when they need their help and supply. Parents did all cheerfully and freely; they grudged their children nothing they had, nothing they did for their succour and supply; Oh that children would repay parents herein also like for like; do what they do for them, according as they need them, freely and cheerfully, without the least regreeting thought. Parents, in many respects, denyed themselves, for their childrens sakes: fared the harder, that they might have food enough, sometimes spared it from their own bellies, that their children might have it; they went meanly and coarsely clad, that the children might have the better apparel; especially those little children that were more shiftless that [Page 144] the rest, they should be sure to have of the best they could get for them. Let children also in many respects deny themselves for their more shiftless parents sake. It was not cost their parents stood upon, according to their abilities and ranck, they would willingly sequester of the best of their estates, so their children might have what was fit for them, for back, or belly, for their education to literature, or other imployments as they were thereof more capable, let children repay like for like in this, to spare no cost for them: and to let parents partake of the best of what God giveth them, and not of the refuse thereof, for their supply. It was an ingenious Act of Reuben, who finding a thing better than ordinary, a Mandrake, he bringeth and giveth it to his Mother Leah, Gen. 30. 14. And Sampson, if he meet with hony and hony-combe, his Father and Mother shall have part of it, Judg. 14. 9▪ And Joseph sendeth his Father, not of the refuse, but of the good things (or better sort of things) of Egypt, Gen. 45. 23. And when he commeth to Egypt, he doth not put him into some wast building, or into some blind and old hole, and barren out-corner of the Land, but he procureth him and his houshold to be placed in Goshen, in the best part of Egypt, Gen. 45. 13. compared with Chap. 47. 6. And what though children should be fain to spare somewhat from themselves, for such like needfull supplies of their parents, out of their best things? yet they must do like for like, their parents having done as much and more for them, as we said even now. It is a good speech of Aristotle, Ethic. l. 9. cap. 2. [...]. Children seem in speciall fort to be [Page 145] bound as debtors, to supply their parents with things necessary for their provision. And it is more comely to supply necessaries, to the causes of our being, than to our selves. And then he addeth that speech, [...], and we must give honour to them, even as it were to Gods; see in what a plentifull way, by the light of nature this heathen Philosopher seeth, children ought to minister to their parents, even in all things they stand need of; and in what a self-denying way, Judging it meetest for children to prefer their parents, in such supplies, before themselves; and in what an honourable, awfull and conscientious way (as I may call it) all should be carryed, even as if they were offering some Sacrifice to God himself. And how justly all this is due, from children to parents, its not a matter left to their own curtesie, and will, whether they will do it, or not do it; nor is it a matter of meer charity, as alms to other poor, but children are bound thereto, as debtors; and no wonder, he saith its meeter we provide for the causes of our being, than for our selves; For he maketh children (and that rightly) parents debtors, (as he doth else-where in his Ethicks) and debtors we know, must, in case, take care to pay their Creditors, and to Live of the rest; as the Prophet advised her, 2 Kings 4. So must children, in case, spare it from their own selves, that parents may Reasons why recompence is due to parents are taken 1. from Childrens state as Children: being Gods rewards. be supplyed.
Now let us briefly give some reasons of this duty.
The 1. Reason may be taken from the Condition, and state of children, as children: they are, or should be made up of recompence, be all recompence: they are given of God to their godly [Page 146] parents as rewards, Psal. 128. 3. The fruit of the womb is his reward; God intends them as rewards; if they prove otherwise than such every way, they do what in them lyeth, to frustrate Gods ends; so are they an heritage of the Lord, Ibid. Not alone such as God will improve for his own honour, and possess for his own use, but such as should, by the blessing of God, Minister a blessed income of comfort, succour, support, and supply to their parents, as from the Lord by them; according as they may stand in need thereof.
2. Reason may be taken from the nature of such 2. From the nature of such recompence, it is piety. gratefull recompence; it is counted, and called of God by the name of piety, 1 Tim. 5. 4. Let them learn [...] to exercise piety towards their own house, or to requite their parents. In some cases it is preferred before giving to religious uses, as to the Corban, for Temple uses, Mark 7. 10, 11, 12, 13. Christ condemneth the giving to the Corban, that which should have been rather sequestred for parents supply by their Children.
3. Reason, from the justice, and equity of it; 3. From the justice and equity of it. children have received their very essence, and existence, instrumentally, from parents, and that is more than all that which children can Minister to them, as Christ said in another case, Is not the life more than meat, and the body than rayment? and so I might say here; and what then can children return to parents in lieu thereof, besides all the cares, fears, exercises, and troubles of parents in behalf of their Childrens outward, and inward welfare, for which children can never make them amends? 4. From the benefits comming by parents.
4. Reason, may be taken from that blessed fruit which children of good parents reap, even in outward [Page 147] blessings, by their Prayers, blessing, covenant-interests, and the like. A good man leaveth an inheritance to his childrens children respecting the outward, as well as the inward man, Prov. 20. 7. the just mans children are blessed after him, in outward matters, so far as is good for them, as well as in spirituall things, Psal. 112. 1, 2, 3. The seed of fearers of God, have Gods promise of becomming mighty upon the earth, and the generation of the upright shall be blessed: blessed indefinitely, and so every way blessed, blessed in their bodies, blessed in their spirits, blessed in their names, in their labours, in their estates, in their relations, in their undertakings, in their choices and changes, blessed in their protections, provisions, plenty, and the like. And surely children are then bound in regard of so much good which commeth by their parents, to communicate to them in all the good blessings of God, which for their sakes they the rather received.
Let us now make some use, and application of what hath been said; the use serveth
Use 1. For reproof, and conviction to all Use of reproof. 1. To ingratefull Children. children, who are ungratefull to your parents; to be unthankfull to any man, is made one of the carachters of a man, who though he may have a form of godliness, yet he denieth the power of it, and from whom Churches should turn away, have nothing to do with them, if not reject them from them, if any such be membors of them, 2 Tim. 3. 2. 5. Ʋnthankfull, having a form of godlinesse, but denying the power of it, from such turn away; and if so with ungrateful persons to other men, its much The great evill of it and in it. more so with ungratefull children. Its noted as a vile part in that ungratefull Butler, one upon whom Joseph had such compassion, when he was [Page 148] sad, of whose dream Joseph had given so good, and effectuall an interpretation, Gen. 40. 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 21. that as v. 23. yet did not the chief Butler remember Joseph, but forgate him; how much viler a thing is this for children, not to remember their afflicted parents, when they themselves are inlarged? The Prophet by way of allusion, comparing the Church to a Mother, and her members to Children, bringeth it as a very monstrous thing, Esay 51. 18. There is none to guide her among all the Sons she hath brought forth, neither is there any that taketh her by the hand, of all that she hath brought up, so that it were a very monstrous thing, if a naturall Mother having many children, should have none to become her guide, her staffe, and stay, in her misery, and afflicted estate; what is a more cutting, & killing blow to your parents hearts, than to see you their children prove ingratefull to them? David made nothing of Shemies cursing him, in comparison of Absolom, a Son out of his own bowels to rise up against him, 2 Sam. 16. 11. your parents groundedly expect it from you their children, that surely you would be helpfull to them in their age, sickness, weakness, wants, and the like, and if hope deferred maketh the heart sick, Prov. 13. 12. what doth hope disappointed? Oh it wounded Jobs heart, when in his affliction, it was, as Job 19. 14. my kindred (saith he,) failed me, and my familiar friends forgat me, vers. 15. they that dwell in my house and my maidens count me for a stranger, I am an Alien in their sight. Vers. 16. I called my servant, and he gave me no answer: I intreated him with my mouth, vers. 17. my breath is strange to my wife, though I entreated for the childrens sake of my own body, and what a gash would such like ingratitude [Page 149] in his children, if they had been living, have given unto his troubled spirit? it was sad enough to the man to meet with so much trouble, and affliction, both inwardly, and outwardly, Psal. 88. but that was as the very core in his wounds, vers. 16. that Lover and friend was put far from him; and much more is this ingratitude in children, an intollerable grievance to your afflicted parents, as it is an abominable wickedness also in the children; If he said of other ingratitude, Ingratum dixeris, omnia dixeris, call me unthankfull, and call me any thing, surely it may be much more verified here: he that may justly be termed ungratefull to parents, may be termed any thing that hath wickednesse in the notion of it; he is one ingratefull to God, ingratefull to man, he is one that is unnaturall, inhumane, unfaithfull, unmercifull, hard-hearted, proud, covetous, destitute of grace, of a good conscience, of godly wisdome, and the knowledge of God, of faith, and hope in God, of love of God, and the fear of God, each of which might be fully made good against such a one, if I should enter that task; but it shall suffice to name the same.
But to come to some particulars to be here reproved.
Let this abase such of you, as have been, and 1. It reproveth in speciall 1. Such as are a very grief to parents. still are a very heart cut, and grief, to your parents, by your lewd courses, and carriages. Like Esau, and his wives, of whom its said, Gen. 26. 35. they were a grief of mind unto Isaac, and Rebeckah, namely by their vile speeches, and carriages, and the like; hence also that speech of Rebeckah, Gen. 27. 46. I am weary of my life, because of the daughters of Heth. Hence, Prov. 10. 1. a foolish, or ungratious Son, (saith Solomon) is the heaviness of his [Page 150] Mother, and Prov. 17. 25. A foolish (or ungracious) Son is a grief to his Father, and bitterness to her The evill and vileness of this. that bare him; but as Moses said to those ungratefull Children of God of old, Deut. 32. 6. So may I, by way of allusion, say to all such Children of men, do you thus requite your parents, O foolish Children, and unwise? you should be the joy of your parents, and such as make their hearts glad, Pro. 23. 25. And do you make them sad? you should be as Vine branches, Psal. 128. 3. yeelding sweet cheering clusters of grapes, and are your grapes (as it is said of them, Deut. 32. 32.) grapes of gall, and are your clusters bitter? or as v. 33. Is your wine the poyson of Dragons, and the cruell venim of Aspes, manifestly indangering the very lives of your parents? have your parents wept so oft for you, when you were sick, or in pain, or any way ill at ease, or in any supposed danger of limb, or life, and is this your requitall, to draw yet more tears from their eyes, and sighes from their grieved, oppressed hearts by your miscarriages? have they joyed so oft, so much, in your birth, in your growth, in your education, expecting that you would have been Abshaloms, your Fathers peace, Cains, your parents portions, and are you rather Benonies, your Mother, and Fathers sorrows? have not your parents enough otherwise to grieve them, in respect of their many inward ayles, and wants, in respect of many temptations, heart burthens, in respect of outward cumbers, and crosses, persecutions, reproaches, &c? but must you be adding to their afflictions? if God took that so ill from the heathen, that when he was but a little displeased with his people, they helped forward the affliction? Zeph. 1. 15. will he not be sore displeased (as he saith here) with you who thus help forward [Page 151] your Parents afflictions? Have your parents given marrow to your bones, and will you thus dry up their bones? Prov. 17. 22. A broken Spirit dryeth the bones; they gave you breath, and will you by such grief, break their wind (as I may say) bring them to that pass, as they cannot stir up staires, or down, (as we say) but they have almost lost their breath; make them go up and down panting, and blowing for want of breath, scarce able to speak a few words to God or men, but they must make pawses ever and anon to recover breath they are so spent? Prov. 15. 13. by sorrow of heart the spirit is broken, that is, as Junius noteth upon that place, Veluti Anhelus, & suspiriosus efficitur homo, & respiratio ejus interscinditur, A man is made as one that is broken-winded; your parents many a time have carried you in their Arms, and born the burthens of your educations, and the like, and will you now break the very back of their hearts, and spirits, which should help sustain and bear up all other burthens, by your continuall grieving of them? Prov. 12. 25. heaviness in the heart maketh it stoop, as an heavy load weigheth down the body; now the spirit of a man is that which sustaineth his infirmity, Prov. 18. 14. and how do you dis-inable poor parents to hold up head, and heart, under other burthens of theirs? your dear Mother underwent sorrows in her conceiving you, and bearing you in her womb, and in your birth, and both Father and Mother met with many sorrows in your bringing up, from the womb to your ripe age, and will you now make them go sorrowing to their graves, by your lewdness; or by your vile courses, carriages, and speeches, bring their gray haires with sorrow to their graves? shall they pay so dearly for your pleasures, [Page 152] your gaines, your merry bouts, your excess and riot, &c? doth it not suffice the drunkard, to drink so much of the blood of the grape, and the spirits of the vine, but he must also swallow down so many drams of the blood and spirits of his dear Father, and tender-hearted Mother? whil'st you, as disolute Children, are making your beds, (as you suppose) with Roses, in your voluptuous, and vile courses, you are filling your Fathers beds with Bryers, and stuffing their pillows with thorns; and what restless nights must your poor parents have that while? Children should be restorers of their parents lives, Ruth 4. 15. (he shall be to thee a restorer of thy life) and will any of you be so inhumane, and brutish, as by such grief, which you cause to your parents, to shorten their dayes, impair their lives, and hasten their going out of the world? well, let me tell such, that this is a degree of paricide. God who in the 6th Commandement saith, thou shalt not kill, requireth to save life, to preserve, and cherish life: and if not to save life be to kill, Mar. 3. 4. then not to cherish parents, so as to help to preserve their lives, is to kill them: he that forbiddeth also killing another, forbiddeth all means tending to shorten anothers dayes, as its evident heart griefs do, Prov. 12. 25. and 5. 13. and 17. 22. Surely then, you that by your vile courses cause such grief to your parents, as dryeth their bones, maketh their hearts stoop, breaketh their very spirits, you are so far forth guilty of paricide; and shall Murtherers of Fathers, and Murtherers 2. Such as minister not suitably and seasonably to parents wants. of Mothers escape? surely no, 1 Tim. 1. 9. the Law, and all the punishments, and curses thereof, are for such, in speciall sort.
2. It serveth to abase such among you, as minister [Page 153] not suitably and seasonably to parents wants, or the like, when they need succour, and help, in age, in poverty, in sickness, in lameness, or the like; now not to guide them, not to help them, not to take them (as it were) by the hand, (as that phrase is in Esay 51. 18. Its most loathsome in you. If God would not have them, Esay 58. 7. to hide themselves from their own flesh, brethren of the same stock of Israel; surely much less, to hide themselves from them that gave them their flesh, and blood, and lives; if the Brother fallen into decay with an Israelite, he must relieve him, yea though he be a stranger, or a sojorner, that he may live with him, Levit. 25. 35. much more must be done to a parent by a childe; and if who so hath this worlds good, and seeth his brother hath need, and shutteth up this bowels of compassion from him, the love of God dwelleth not in him, 1 Joh. 3. 17. surely much less can there be any love of God in that Childe, that so ingratefully shall neglect his needy parent; 1 Tim. 5. 8. who so provideth not for his own, &c. is worse than an Infidell: which as was said, is to be referred to Childrens neglect of providing answerable supplies unto parents needs, and so, such are worse than Infidels. Notable is that example which Valerius Maximus in his 5th Book and Chap. 4th mentioneth: A certain grave woman condemned to die by the Roman Praetor, and delivered to one of the Triumviri that she might be strangled in the Prison, the Keeper of the Prison moved with pitty to the woman, deferred her strangling, and thought to let her die of famine rather, & suffered her daughter to visit her sometimes, onely searched her, that she brought no food with her for her Mother: but wondering at length, that the grave Matron lived so long, and [Page 154] watching more narrowly, at length espied the yong woman suckling her Mother, with her breasts, and examining her about it, she confessed, she had so done all the while her Mother had been a Prisoner, whereupon the Keeper acquainting the Triumvir, and he the Praetor, and he the Consulls, the condemned Matron was pardoned, and so escaped death, whereupon saith Valerius Maximus, Quo non penetrat, aut quid non excogitat pietas? where will not piety towards parents make entrance, and what will not that invent, which can find out a new way to preserve the life of a Mother in Prison? and the like story he hath there of the like course that a young woman took, to preserve the life of her Father Cimon, condemned to a like end. Saith Tully, it is a most hainous thing not to nourish parents. Solon made a Law, that he that doth not nourish his parents, let him be infamous; yea such are worse than the brute creatures, the Storks, as Pliny, and other natural Historians report, they carry their old ones betwixt two of them, and feed them by turns, whence the Law amongst the very heathens for nourishing of parents, is called [...] the Law of piety, after the manner of Storks; and in the Hebrew phrase, the Stork hath his name of piety, Jer. 8. 7. Psal. 104. 17. The Hebrew word for Stork is [...] from [...] pious, gracious, kind, bountifull, &c. the very Dormise, (as Pliny telleth us, in his Nat Hist. lib. 9. Chap. 57.) they also nourish up the old ones when spent with age, and shiftless; besides, in professed Christians, its to deny the faith, which men hold forth, and profess, not thus to provide for their own; for the faith which they profess to believe, the doctrine of piety, teacheth them otherwise, tho they hereby [Page 155] deny to practise it; and the faith whereby they believe (at least profess so) that assuredly would teach otherwise; hence that Emphasis in the Apostles exhortation to piety towards parents, 1 Tim. 5. 16. If a man, or woman [that believeth] hath widdows, and Mothers by his own, or wives side (or the like) Let him relieve (or Minister sufficiently to) them: besides this sin invalidateth, what in you lyeth, the 5th Commandement, Mar. 7. 10, 11, 12, 13. Moses saith, Honour thy Father, and Mother, but you will not suffer a man to do ought for his Father, or Mother, and so make the word of God of none effect; nor will any pretences (as there are) for need of what parents should have, for religious uses, for the Corban, and that by bestowing the same upon such uses, parents will have benefit enough, and the like, not such, nor any other pretence whatsoever will pass with God, why children should neglect, or omit so weighty a duty of ministring to their parents. If Job say, if I have seen any poor without covering, if his loynes have not blessed me, then let my arm fall from my shoulder blade, &c? Job 31. 19, 20, 21. Surely much less could he charge himself with any such sin as this is we are speaking of; and lest any pretend ignorance of parents straights, and wants, verily you must look after that, and make sure of that, that they do not lack any suitable supply, as 1 Tim. 5. 8, 16. Evinceth; and let men take heed they delude not themselves this way. I may say as Solomon said in another cause, Prov. 24. 12. If thou sayest, behold, we knew it not; Doth not he that pondereth the heart consider it, and he that keepeth thy soul doth not he know it, and shall not he render to every man according to his works? if Christ be so severe against neglect, and omission of supply of [Page 156] ministring to his other needy, sick, or imprisoned ones, as Matth. 25. 41. Depart from me ye cursed into everlasting fire prepared for the Devill and his Angels, vers. 42. For I (namely in my members, as vers. 46. expoundeth it) was hungry, and ye gave me no meat, I was thirsty, and ye gave no drink, vers. 43. I was a stranger, and ye took me not in, naked, and ye cloathed me not, sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not: How dreadfully will he speak to all and every one of you who are unnaturall, ingratefull Children, who have suffered your Christian Parents to want such supply, and help, as you might have ministred, but did it not?
And here also as subordinate to this particular reproved in children, we might reprove deboist youngsters, who by their dissolute courses wast their estates, whereby they might have ministred to Parents wants afterwards, but by their own prodigality come to be disinabled: But we shall leave them to consider of 1 Cor. 6. 9, 10. and Prov. 23. 20, 21, 29. to the end, and Isa. 5. 22. and verse 11. unto verse 18. and such other Scriptures.
3. It serveth to abase such of you, as any way 3. Such as steal away or wast Parents estates. impair your Parents outward Estates, by stealing from them, as Prov. 28. 24. Who so robbeth his Father or his Motber, and saith it is no transgression, is the Companion of a destroyer, or a destroying man, Heb. a Highway-side robber or associate to them: inuring himself to pilfer smaller matters from Parents, Imagining or at least pretending to himself or others, that there is no hurt, no great fault in that; he learneth the trade of thieving, and at length is an open practitioner thereof, and is a destroying man to himself at last: commeth [Page 157] to the Gallowes. This (as I may say) is the Genesis of such a youngsters course, and many a wretch at the Gallowes, hath made an answerable Analysis of his lewd course, till he hath brought it up to this as the very head and beginning of it, they first began to pilfer this and that from their Father and Mother, else had never come to this sad end. Michas thieving and stealing from his Mother received indeed a stop, Judg. 17. 1, 2. But he occasioned his Mothers curse, ibid. and so many such like acts occasion the like from other Parents. But say, you wast not your Parents estates this way, if you do it by secret excesse in Drinking and Feasting, or in gaming, or company-keeping, it is an evill requitall to your Parents, for all their care and paines, to lay up somewhat to mantain their children comfortably and honourably, and you thus basely cast it away, Prov. 16. 26. He that wasteth his Father, and chaseth away his Mother, is a Son that causeth shame. Mothers, who, of the two, are the most tenderhearted towards their Children, yet even their hearts are alienated from children by such vile courses. Such profuse mispending of Fathers Estates, even chaseth away a tender hearted Mother. But oh how farr doth it estrange the heart of the Lord himself, from any such miscreants as you are?
4. It serveth to abase such of you as are cruel, 4. Such as are hard-hearted to their Brethren. or hard-hearted to your fellow brethren or sisters, like Edomites to the Israelites their kindred, not only looking on upon them in their Affliction, without succouring of them, but spoyling of them themselves, Obad. 12. 13, 14, &c. For which, the vengeance of God was then threatned, and afterwards executed upon them. Now such ingratefull, [Page 158] unkind dealings with your Brethren, it is unkind requitall of your Parents, in Gods account. As Abimelech and the men of Shechem, raging so against his seventy Brethren, Judg. 9. 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. Its called wickedness done by Abimelech to his Father, and God accordingly avenged the same, by making Abimelech and the Shechemits, which were fellow-actours in that Inhumanity, to be mutuall executioners of divine Justice, each upon other, Judg. 9. 56. Thus God rendred the wickednesse of Abimelech which he did unto his Father in slaying his seventy Brethren. Unkindness to Children being ever reckoned, as unkindnesse offered to Fathers. As the Edomites unkindness to the Israelites, is unkindness to Edoms Brother Jacob, Obad. 10. 11, &c. So when Joash dealt so unworthily with Zecheriah, good Jehoiadahs son, Its said of it, 2 Chron. 24. 22. Thus Joash the King remembred not the kindnesse which Jehoiada his Father had done to him, but slew his Son, &c.
5. Let it abase all such of you as in any unnatural 5. Such as are treacherous, or inhumane to parents. way either betray your good Parents to persecutors malice: of which, Matth. 13. 12. The Children shall cause the Parents to be put to death; which must needs be a double death to them (in a manner) as in a sort that was to Christ, to be betrayed by one of his own Children (as it were) One of you (saith he to his Disciples) shall betray one, Matth. 26. Or if you be any other waies inhumane towards your Parents, by striking them, though not mortally: which God maketh death to such monsters of mankind, Exod. 21. 15. He that striketh Father or Mother shall die. And what then will be the doom of paricides, who strike them mortally? Absalom would have done it, [...] Sam. 16. 11. He sought his Fathers life, and [Page 159] Senacheribs sons did it, as he was worshiping in the house of Nisroch his God, they smote him with the sword, 2 King. 19. 37. Surely the Law, even all the Curses and Judgments of the Law must needs be the portion of such Paricides, 2 Tim. 1. 9. Who so ill requite their tender-hearted Parents and causes of their lives.
A second use serveth for exhortation, 1. To 2. Use of exhortation. Parents.
Do you what lieth in you, to further, and look 1. To parents to further this gratitude in their Children. 1. By leaving them the choycer blessings of God. that you no way do any thing to hinder your children in this duty of gratefull recompencing of Parents; for which end,
1. Take speciall care to leave your children the good blessings of God, respecting their souls welfare; for this will lie as a strong ingagement upon your childrens hearts, the rather gratefully to recompence you, their Parents. Thus God required of them of old, that they should so carry it, that they might leave the Land of Canaan, (a Type of blessings of an higher nature) for an inheritance to their Children for ever. The like is charged; 2 Chron. 28. 8. This was the gratious care of the Fathers of the two tribes and half, to detain their children in the way of Gods worship and fear, and to prevent whatsoever might hinder or discourage their posterity from the same, Josh. 22. 25, 26, 27, 28. And if we have not rather done it for fear of this thing, saying, in time to come your children might speak to our Children, saying, what have you to do with the Lord God of Israel? yee have no part in the Lord; So shall your Children make our Children cease from fearing the Lord. Therefore we said, let us now prepare to build us an altar, not for burnt offerings, nor for sacrifice: but that it may be a witnesse between us and you, and our generations after us, that [Page 160] we might do the service of the Lord before him, &c. This was Joshuah's care also for his, Josh. 24. 15. But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord, And this was Abrahams care, Gen. 28. 29. I know him (saith the Lord) that he will command his Children, and household after him, and they shall walk in his waies, that God may bring upon Abraham, (namely in his posterity) what he hath promised him.
2. Use all lawfull meanes, industry, and providence to leave your Children in such places, and 2. By leaving them inabling meanes and wayes for it. in such callings, and (if it may be) with such portions, that they may not alone be the more ingaged, but inabled also (in an ordinary way of providence) to discharge such a duty of filial recompence to the utmost. Thus Jacobs care was to provide for his house, Gen. 30. 30. and he had children solicitous and industrious to provide for him, in his straits, in that time of famine, witness, their journeyes for that end into Egypt, Gen. 42. and 43, and 44. But in a most eminent way it was seen in his Son Ioseph: whose great care was that way, Gen. 45. 9. Thus saith thy Son Joseph, Come down to me and tarry not, and vers. 10. Thou shalt dwell in the land of Goshen, and thou shalt be near to me, thou and thy Children, and thy Childrens Children, and thy flocks and herds, and all that thou hast, vers. 22. and there will I nourish thee (for yet there are five years of Famine) lest thou and thy household, and all that thou hast, come to poverty. 3. By distilling into Children principles of gratitude to others, and curbing the contrary in them.
3. Distil into your children principles of gratitude to others, especially unto progenitors: So did Ruth into Obed her Son, whence that prophetical speech of good women present at Obeds birth, which they spake to his Grandmother Naomi, [Page 161] Ruth 4. 15. He shall be to thee a restorer of thy life, and a nourisher of thy old age: for thy Daughter-in-law, which loveth thee, (and therefore will be instructing him that way) hath born him. And if Parents perceive any expressions of an ungratefull Spirit in their Children, though towards others, let them be sure to rebuke their children for it, and seasonably to root up such sprouts, of so bad a Spirit. So did good Jethro in his Daughters, when they told him what kindness Moses had done to them, Exod. 2. 19, 20. saith he to his Daughters, and where is he? why is it that ye left the man? call him, that he may eat bread.
4. Be you exemplary to your Children, in this 4. By being examples thereof to Children. gratefull recompence of your Parents. Hence also their Argument concerning Obed, that he would prove such a pious child to his Grandmother Naomi, Ruth 4. 15. He will be a nourisher of thy old age; For thy Daughter which loveth thee, which is better to thee then seaven sons (and in her exemplary piety towards thee) hath born him. If children are continually taught by Parents examples of piety to their parents, as well as by their Instructions, to be thus pious, they will assuredly learn (as Pauls phrase is,) 1 Tim. 5. 4. to shew piety at home, and to requite their Parents.
5. Be it far from you to be so ungracious towards 5. By avoiding any thing favouring of unnaturalness to them. your godly children, as not to shield off blowes from them, what in you lieth: like the Father and Mother of the blind man, leave him to shift for himself, with He is of years, let him answer for himself, John 9. 21, 22. So did not Joash; who in that honest cause of his son Gideon, stood in his defence, Iudg. 6. 31. Joash said to all that stood by him against his Son, will you plead for Baal? will you save him? he that will plead for him let [Page 162] him be put to death whilest it is yet morning, if he be a God, let him plead for himself, because one hath cast down his Altar. But much less, let any Parent requite good children so ill, as themselves to undermine their childrens safety or liberty, Luke 21. 16. Yee shall be betrayed by Parents, &c.
2. It is of exhottation to children. 2. Exhortation to Children gratefully to recompence Parents. Motives to it.
Be you stirred up to piety, and gratefull recompence to your Parents. And that you may be stirred up hereunto, besides that it is honourable in the sight of God, Angels and Men so to do, whence such Records kept of gratefull Children, in honorem, as of Joseph, and others, Consider,
1. That by the very light of nature, it hath been 1. Naturall light. strongly urged, and exemplarily practised, as we have hinted before.
Plato in his 8. Book de Republica, sheweth, that a Child oweth to the Father, all things respecting his outward maintainance and comfort, as a recompence for his Birth and Education: and Tully saith, We are not born for our selves, but partly for our Country, partly for our Parents, and partly for our Children, &c.
2. Consider, that those that are not gratefull to 2. Else not gratefull to ones Country. their Parents, will never be grateful to their country, or self-denying for its good. Hence that also of Tully, It conduceth much to the welfare of our country, that Children be pious to their Parents.
3. Consider, that therefore the Lord inableth 3. Childrens abilities given for this end. you the rather with bodily strength, with gifts and parts, with Estates, with advantageous places and callings, that you may be fit for such a service of gratefull recompence of your Parents. That blessed man Joseph concludeth thus of all his great Preferments and Abilities, which God brought him to in Egypt, that it was all for this [Page 163] very end, Gen. 45. 7, 8, 9, 10, 11. God sent me before your face (saith he to his Brethren) to preserve you a posterity in the earth, &c. So then it was not you that sent me hither, but God; and he hath made me a Father to Pharaoh, and Lord of all his house, and a Ruler throughout all the Land of Egypt; Haste you, and go up to my Father, and say to him, thus saith thy Son Joseph, God hath made me Lord of all Egypt: Come down to me and tarry not, &c. And there will I nourish them, &c.
4. Consider, that there is nothing lost by what 4. Nothing is lost by it you do deny your selves in, out of gratitude to your Parents, but much gained every way thereby, 2 Tim. 5. 4. And to requite their Parents, for this is good and acceptable before God: Its good with the goodness of advantage, as well as honesty, or honour before God: It is acceptable before God, and therefore surely most beneficiall from Helpes. 1. Serious meditations of what Parents have done for them. God to Children. And for your helps this way, It were good for you to think very much and often, and that with much seriousness of intention of mind, upon the many unexpressible, invaluable, irrecompensible benefits and kindnesses which you have from your Parents. O when the people thought of that service of love of Jonathan to them all, and should any discourtesie be offered to such a one, no by no means, 1 Sam. 14. 45. Shall Jonathan dye, who hath wrought this great Salvation in Israel? God forbid. So in like sort the thoughts of what good Parents have been instruments of to Children, they will crush temptations to ingratitude, and provoke to gratitude. Besides, be you conscious in giving your Parents 2. Give their other honour of Respect, Reverence, & Obedience. their due honour of Respect, Reverence, and Obedience, and then there is no doubt, but you will be put upon it, to give them this other part [Page 164] also of direct Honour, even the Honour of Recompence; Cautious. Let it be with greatest 1. Bowels. only look to it, that what you do this way in gratefull Rccompence to Parents,
1. That it be with greatest bowels and tenderness: Parents did so in ministring to you what you wanted, do you repay them like for like.
2. That it be with greatest meekness and patience, 2. Meekness. bearing with frailties, and waywardness of age; as Parents did with waywardness, in ministring to you in infancy and child-hood, so repay them like for like.
3. That it be with much humility, stooping to the meanest offices of love for them: as Parents did 3. Humility. for you, whil'st little, do you herein repay them like for like.
To conclude, Children may also discern their Marks of right doing it. conscientious piety to Parents.
1. If when you your selves are in disconsolate, 1. If when Children in saddest conditions are cordially sollicitous of Parents help. yea desolate conditions, yet you are then very cordially carefull of your Parents outward welfare: as David of his Parents safety with the King of Moab, 2 Sam. 22. when himself is as an outlaw, or as it was with the Son of David, when upon the Crosse, in all that sorrow and pain, &c. yet how carefull was he, that his poor Mother be provided well for? Joh. 19. 26, 27. Man (saith he to John) behold thy Mother.
2. If your effectuall care of your parents 2. When carefull this way in married conditions. comfortable beeings, be not alone in your single conditions, whil'st unmarried, but flourish when you are marryed. So it did in Joseph, in David, in Ruth and others.
3. If when you are in a very high and more honourable 3. When carefull this way in highest conditions. place than parents, then you be nourishers of them, yea if you are perswaded in your [Page 165] very hearts, that God the rather exalted you thus for your parents sakes, that in their straights, you might have abundantly and sufficiently to supply them withall, and the rather do it. Thus it was in Josephs case, he thought that God made him a Lord in all the Land of Egypt, to preserve his Father, and his houshold alive, in that time of famine, and upon that ground sends to him to come to him, promising to nourish him, Gen. 45. 7, 8, 9, 10, 11. and accordingly he did it, Gen. 47. 12. And Joseph nourished his Father, and his brethren, and all his Fathers houshold, with bread, according to their Families. To conclude this with that memorable speech of Cyrus mentioned by Plutarch in his Apothegms; he used to say (and that which is the truth) he is not fit to rule over others, who is not profitable to his parents.
CHAP. VII. Of Honour in a Reflect way due from Children unto Parents.
HAving dispatched the direct Acts and wayes of Honour of parents, we come now to that Honour of Parents, which is due to them in a Reflect way. For so honouring another is taken in Scripture, for being such, or carrying it so towards another, whom men are to Honour, as it may make for such an ones Honour: as we shewed in the 1. Chapter. So here in the 5th Commandement this indefinite word, Honour thy Father, & thy Mother, taketh in Honouring of parents in a reflect way, and bindeth Children to be such to [Page 166] their parents, and to carry it so, as may redound to their Honour, especially being such parents as the covenant Jewes were, in Church State, and many of them godly, to whom this Law of the 5th Commandement, was first solemnly promulged, and to whom it was more solemnly established.—Whence note, That its the duty of children, Children of good Parents, especially bound to be such, and to carry it so, as maketh for their Parents Honour, and that, 1. By minding, prising, and storing up parents instructions. especially the children of godly parents, and such as are in covenant and Church-estate, to be such, and to carry it so, as may redound to their parents honour. Now here also let us shew,
1. How this is to be done.
2. Why it must be so.
And 3. Apply and make use of this so weighty a point. Concerning the first, such children especially are bound,
1. To be observing, minding, prising, and treasuring up such parents good speeches, as so many oracles of God: which will evidence to all, that their Children honour them; Job 15. 18. which wise men have told from their Fathers, and have not hid it; a sign then, that those wise Children, minded well, and stored up their godly Fathers counsels; so Psal. 44. 1, 2. We have heard with our ears, Oh God, our Fathers have told us, what thou didst in their dayes, &c. So Psal. 78. 2, 3. I will utter mysterious sayings of old, which we have heard and known, and our Fathers have told us. Prov. 4. 3, 4. For I was my Fathers Son—he taught me also and said to me, retain my words, keep my Commandements and live, Get wisdome, yet understanding, &c. To which purpose also, children must in case of any difficulty, or doubt arising to them, repair firstly to their godly parents for counsell and resolution. How oft is that mentioned, when thy Son asketh thee in time to come, saying, what mean the [Page 167] Testimonies, and the Statutes which the Lord our God hath Commanded you? then thou shalt say thus and thus to thy Son, &c. Deut. 6. 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25. So Exod. 13. 14. Josh. 4. 6, 21. This reflecteth much Honour upon parents wisdome and ability, that they are able to give forth Gods mind to their children; and upon their piety and fidelity, that they make conscience to do it; and upon their holy industry and vigilancy, that they are ready to take all occasions to help on their Children in the things of God.
2. To acquaint parents, in the first place, with 2. By acquainting them with their secrets. all their Secrets, which are of weight. Its implyed in Sampsons speech, speaking of his Riddle, Judg. 14. 16. I have not told my Father, nor my Mother, and should I tell it thee? This evidenceth, that Children magnifie their parents wisdome and fidelity above others, that their breasts shall be the only prime Cabinet of the Childrens Secrets.
3. To ask leave of their parents, at least whil'st 3 By asking their leave for what they do. Children are under their tuition, for what they do. Ruth. 2. 2. Let me go I pray thee (saith Ruth to Naomi) to glean in his field, in whose eyes I shall find favour, and she said, go my Daughter. Exod. 4. 18. Let me go (saith Moses to Jethro) and return to my brethren which are in Egypt, and see whether they be yet alive: and Jethro said to Moses, go in peace. 2 Sam. 13. 26. Let my brother Ammon go with us (saith Absolom to David, though out of a bad end;) and Chap. 15. 17. Let me go I pray thee, and pay my vow unto the Lord in Hebron, saith Absolom to his Father, though out of a base end. If Dinah (as its probable) did without leave from her parents, go, to see the daughters of the Country, then was it no wonder that being [Page 168] out of her way, she so miscarried, as Genesis 34. 1, 2. Shechem saw her, took her, and lay with her, and defiled her. This also redounds to the Honour of the Parents Authority, that Children shew thereby that they dare not attempt any thing, without their likings; yea and their wisdome-fidelity is hereby honoured, that they know better what is meet for Children to do, than themselves, and will order their wayes better than they can do themselves.
4. To set forth to parents praise, what is good in 4. By setting forth the praise worthiness in parents. them, as occasion requireth: and to maintain their names, even when they are dead, all they can, Prov. 31. 28. Her Children rise up, and call her blessed.
5. To vindicate any wrongs, injury, or dishonor 5. By vindicating parents wrongs. done to parents, so far as it lyeth in the compass of Childrens calls, places: thus Amaziah, 2 Kings 14. 5. as soon as confirmed in his Kingdome he slew his servants, who had slain Jehoash his Father.
6. To do parents all the honour they can at 6. By honouring them at their death. their death, Genes. 25. 9. Abrahams Sons, Isaac and Ishmael, buried him in the Cave of Machpelah; So Gen. 35. 29. Isaacs Sons Esau and Jacob buried him, Gen. 50. 8. And Joseph went up to bury his Father, and with him went up all the servants of Pharaoh, and all the Elders of his house, and all the Elders of Egypt, and all the house of Joseph, and his Brethren, and his Fathers house, only they left their little ones, their flocks, and herds, in the land of Goshen, they and their wives also went so 7. By thankfull rendring notable mercies shewed to parents. great a journey, to solemnize the old Fathers Funerall, and to do him Honour there.
7. To maintain a thankfull remembrance of remarkable mercies extended to parents, or Ancestors, [Page 169] Esay 38. 19. The living, the living, he shall praise thee, as I do this day, (saith Hezekiah, when he recovered from so great a death) the Father to the Children, shall make known thy truth: God would have them of old to perpetuate their Ancestors deliverance out of Egypts bondage, Exod. 13. 8, 9, 10. From the slaughter of their first born there (which to the succeeding posterity were also Fathers,) Exod. 12. 25, 26, 27. So Est. 9. 21, 22, 23, 24, 26, 27. Care was taken for the perpetuation of a thankfull remembrance succesfully for their Ancestors delivery from the mischiefs of Hammons bloody plot. And if our Fathers had more Honour put upon them in our thankfull solemnizing the memoriall of their deliverance from the horrid mischief of that devilish Powder-plot, in the year 1605. it might do well. Surely it redoundeth to parents Honour, if they are of so high esteem and respect in their Childrens eyes, that any notable mercy extended to them, shall be for ever kept in thankfull remembrance by their posterity.
8. To improve godly persons interest in the 8. To make best improvement of the holy interests. Lord, and in his Covenant, by faith, and to plead them in their prayers; this act of Children redoundeth exceedingly to parents Honour, holding forth their parents to be persons so highly honoured of God, as to be deeply interested in him, & in his Covenant and Grace: and to be of such faith in God, and in his Covenant; thus did David twice, Psalm, 116. 16. Truly Lord I am thy servant, the Son of thy handmaid, Psal. 86. 16. give thy strength to thy servant, and save the Son of thy handmaid. In the former, he, in a holy wise, glorieth in his Mothers interest: in the latter he pleadeth her interest in the Lord, 1 Kings 8. 25, [Page 170] 26. Therefore now Oh Lord God of Israel, keep with thy servant David, my Father, that which thou promis'dst him. So Jacob pleaded his Grand-Fathers, and his Fathers interest, Gen. 32. 5. And Jacob said, Oh God of my Father Abram—God of my Father Isaac, &c.
9. To imitate all that good of grace, as of faith, 9. By imitating all that was truly good in them. love, and holiness, righteousness, patience, meekness, courage, constancy, humility, zeal of Gods glory, holy fervency, diligence, fidelity and the like, which children have beheld and seen in their parents. Prov. 4. 12. Saith David to Solomon, I have led thee in the right paths: even by holy example also, Joh. 8. 39. If ye were Abraham's children, ye would do the works of Abraham; if they were genuine children of Abraham, they would shew it, by the honour they really put upon him, by making him an holy exemplar, and pattern to themselves, how to walk before the Lord, and to be upright.
It was a noble speech of a good daughter-in-Law, to her Mother Naomi, a godly Matron, Ruth. 2. 16. Thy God shall be my God, and thy people my people, she would honour all that was honourable in her, her Religion, her faith in God, and worship and service of him, and obedience to him, as also her union and communion with the Church, and love to them and the like.
10. Not to suffer themselves to be drawn aside, 10. By cleaving to their good wayes without degenerating and Apostatising. or to Apostatise, or degenerate from that of God and Christ, and his grace, truth, worship and wayes, which their Parents have held forth to them, in word and deed, precept and practice, and have frequenrly given in charge to their children. This is charged upon children, Prov. 6. 20. My Son, keep tby Fathers Commandements, and forsake [Page 171] not the Law of thy Mother. And Prov. 4. 2. Forsake you not my Law, Prov. 1. 8. My Son, hear the instructions of thy Father, and forsake not the Law of thy Mother. This was commended in those of Judah, the posterity of godly Ancestors, Hos. 11. 12. Judah ruleth yet with God, and, (comparatively to Israel) is faithfull to the Saints, viz. their godly Ancestors, who delivered their faith to their successors to be kept, and carryed, and conveyed to posterity successively, according as they had taught them by precept and practice. Its faithfulness to Ancestors, and so honoureth Ancestors, when posterity continueth to hold out what was most honourable in them, and doth not degenerate them-from: Hence that also, Jer. 35. 13, 14. will you not hearken to my words? saith the Lord, The words of Jonadab, the Son of Rechab, that he commanded his Sons, are performed, for unto this day, they drink no wine, but obey their Fathers Commandement. As if he had said, they put this Honour upon their Ancestors, from Jonadabs time, who first practised it, and gave it in charge to his children, who also left it as their practice, and precept to their Children, and so successively from Parent to Child it hath been observed without alteration to this day, nor will they by any temptation, or triall, even of Jeremiah himself, be drawn aside, from that their mortified practice of weanedness from the worlds delights, and contentments: but you will not Honour me so much, as to follow the Counsels and godly examples of my Prophets, by whom time after time, I have called upon you to wayes of holy obedience.
These two last wayes of Reflect Honour of Parents, by their Children, being the main, we shall therefore, in the prosecution of the point, chiefly attend them.
The Reason hereof may be taken, from the titles Reasons hereof from childrens Titles calling for it. given to Children in Scripture, which hold forth as much, that in Gods appointment, Children as child. should be an honor to their parents.
1. Hence they are called Parents and Ancestors Crowns, Prov. 17. 6. Childrens Children are the Crown of old men. A badge and pledge of their holy royalty, dignity, and excellency: as Crowns are to Princes heads; and Hos. 9. 11. They are called Parents glory: their glory shall flee away, (viz. their Children) from the birth, womb and conception, v. 12. I will bereave them of their Children, which they bring up.
2. They are called Stars, Gen. 37. 9, 10. The glory of the firmament where they are, the Families where they are, albeit not of equall glory to the Father and Mother of the Family, which are theirs, as the Sun and Moon, as Jacob and his wife, and eleven Sons, are in Josephs dream, the Sun, Moon, and eleven Stars.
3. They are Parents rewards from God, and so appointed to be as rewards are to others, for their Honour; so are they in Gods intent, godly Parents heritage: and heritages redound to the possessors Honour.
4. They are in Gods appointment, to be as Olive plants about their Table, a badge and pledge of Honour to their Parents, such as from whom commeth that which will make their parents faces to shine: as Oyle-olive will a mans face. They are as Arrows in the hand of a Gyant, which become instrumental, to many an honourable Trophe and Lawrell Crown of theirs, such as Parents need not beashamed of, but glory in, even in despite of envy, and malice it self, Psal. 127. 4. 5. As Arrows are in the hand of a [Page 173] Gyant, so are Children of youth: happy is the man, that hath his quiver full of them, they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the Gate.
5. Children are in Scripture account builders— [...] from [...] he hath built, Isay 49. 17. Genev. Transl. not only in respect of holding up the Family and the like: but in that their work is to contrive, compose, advance, adorn, replensh, or occasionally to repair that goodly piece, their Parents Honour, as well as safety, comfort, peace, prosperity, or the like.
6. Children are in Scripture account as polished stones of a Palace, Psal. 144. 22. redounding much to the Honour of Parents, who instrumentally formed and framed them.
Reason 2. May be taken from Parents, they are 2. From Times of Parents in Scripture. their Childrens glory, Prov. 17. 6. and the glory of Children are their Fathers: and if good Parents are such an Honour to their Children, Children should be a glory and Honour to their godly Parents; yea the Honour put upon Parents, redounds to their Children, the more glory is upon the Parent, the more is upon the Children, whose glory their Fathers are: so that the more Honour Children are to Parents, and the better they carry it in way of Honour to their Parents, the more Honour they put thereby upon themselves.
The use of this point serveth, first for reproof: Use 1. For Reproof, and that, and that first of Parents, who are many of you, too guilty of your Childrens dishonourable courses and carriages, namely.
1. When you unadvisedly expose your Children 1. Of Parents too much furthering Childrens dishonourable carriages and courses. to dishonourable practices, or temptations thereunto; as Gen. 19. 8. I have two daughters (saith Lot to those beastly Sodomites) which have not known man, let me I pray you bring them out to [Page 174] you, and do yee to them as is good in your own eyes, &c. and vers. 33. 34. they bring him into that snare In exposing rhem to temptations to them. of Incest: and they made their Father drink wine, and the first night the Elder, & the next night the younger daughter went in and lay with her Father. The like was the failing of the good old man, Judg. 19. 23, 24. behold here is my daughter (saith he to those Sodomiticall Benjamites) I will bring her out to you, and humble her, &c. Levit. 19. 29. Do not prostitute thy daughter to be a whore, lest the land fall to whoredome, and the land become full of wickedness: Such a blast of God followeth upon such sinfull acts of Parents. And the like may be said of other evils, of oppression, pride, &c. when Parents professing Religion, will put on your Children upon taking of oppressing wages & prices, upon new-fangled fashions, such a generation commonly proveth degenerate, and the shame of their Fathers houses.
2. When you will be ingaging of your Children, 2. By rash ingagements, laid upon them. in wayes, which tend to insnaring of them, as too many amongst Papists do their Children, in vowes of virginity, when not being able to contain, they are insnared in wayes of unnatural pollutions, and other filthy practices in secret: and too oft of horrid Murthers of the fruit of their bodies: in this way Jephtah was to blame, who rashly vows, Judg: 11. 31. That whatsoever commeth out of his house to meet him, returning in peace from the Children of Ammon, shal surely be the Lords, even the Lords votaries (if they be persons) or that he would offer it up for a burnt-offering, namely, if it were a meet thing to be offered: for so the particle (vau) is to be read disjunctively for (or) and not conjunctively for (and) and so it is in the Margin of your larger Bibles of the New Edition; [Page 175] and a little to digress for the cleering of this place, Shindler, Junius, Mr. Perkins, and others, do so render and understand this vow of Jephtah's and the words of that Scripture. And its usuall in Scripture, so to take the particle (vau) disjunctively, as Gen. 26. 11. He that toucheth this man (vau) or (not and) his wife, shall die; Ex. 20. 10. thou shalt not do any work, thou, ( [...]) or thy Sons ( [...]) or thy daughter, &c. Exod. 21. 15. he that smiteth his Father, ( [...]) or his Mother, shall dye; if he smite not his Father, yet if he smite his Mother, its death; Exod. 12. 5. yee shall take your Lamb out from the sheep ( [...]) or from the goats: It is not (and conjunctively) as if there were to be taken a Lamb from the Sheep, & a Lamb from the Goats, and so two Lambs; Deut. 17. 1. yee shall not sacrifise to the Lord any Bullock ( [...]) or Sheep, wherein is blemish; It is disjunctive, though they should not sacrifise a Bullock that is blemished, yet if a blemished Sheep be sacrifised, its culpable. God had indeed provided a remedy in the law, as for a Male Person, so for a Female Person, which any man had by vow devoted to God: he was to pay in lieu of her 30. Sheckels, Levit. 27. 2, 4. And so Jephtah might have redeemed his daughter from this vow of virginity: but he either was ignorant of it, or in his rashness attended it not, and therefore saith, as vers. 35. that he hath opened his mouth to the Lord, and cannot go back, which his daughter crediting, yeeldeth to his rash vow, v. 36. if so (saith she) do to me according to that which proceeded out of thy mouth, and v. 37. Let me go two moneths up and down the mountains, I and my fellows, and bewail my virginity: She saith not let me go and bewail my life; as indeed she had greatest cause, if her Father had [Page 176] been so bereft of all humanity, as to intend to offer her up for a burnt-offering, or so grosly haereticall, as to think that any such forbidden unnaturall Murther might have been as a Sacrifice to God.
But let me go and bewail my Virginity: to which she was now devoted, and wherein she was offered to the Lord, to be only sequestred to him, and never to marry and have Children, (which to them was a great reproach) and hence vers. 40. The Daughters of Israel went out yearly (namely to the house where she lived without the City, apart from all company) to talk with her, so it is in the margin of the greater Bibles (though rendred to Lament.) And so it is in Arias Montanus his interlineary Bible, ad confabulandum, to talk together. So Buxtorfius in his Hebrew Lexicon, renders, it and quoteth Kimchi, for it also, as rendring this word [...] ad confabulandum, and so Judg. 5. 11. the same word in the same conjugation, is rendred there [...] confabulabuntur, they shall reherse together the righteous acts of the Lord; not they shall lament those acts.
3. When you are too neglectfull of your holy 3. By neglecting their holy watch over them. watch over your Children, to keep a wise and straight hand over them, and that in time, before your Children are grown too stiff and inflexible: or too much hardned in ways tending to their Parents reproach: when you carelesly leave your Children too much to themselves: if they will pray, or read the Scriptures, or hear the word, or attend unto it, or give account of what they heard or read, well, but if they will not, you do not much regard it. If your Children are affected with their naturall state, with things of Christ, with their need of Christ, so: if otherwise, you do not [Page 177] much inquire into it. If your Children be secretly naught, if they be company-keepers, scoffers at purity, and the like, you look not narrowly after those things; and so leave your Children in a manner to themselves, and what wonder then, if as, Prov. 25. 11. A Child left to himself, bringeth his Mother to shame.
4. When you provide not seasonably and suitably 4. By not providing seasonably for them in marriage. for your Children in Marriage, or possibly having consented to the disposall of your children in marriage, will rashly assay to cross your Children, and break their conjugall Ingagements, which, with your consent, they have made; How frequently do reproaches arise to Parents from dishonourable consequences thereof in their Children? Lot was too blame, that he looked not out seasonably for some fit matches for his two daughters, which had formerly minded marriage (witness the contract between them and two men in Sodom, called therfore for his Sons in Law, which had married his daughters, Gen. 19. 14.) for they seeing no man like to come in to them in a conjugall way, as v. 30. there is no man to come in to us, after the manner of all the earth: then they plotted that incestuous course, whereby their Father was so highly dishonoured, v. 32. come therefore, let us make our Father drink wine, and we will come and lie with him, that we may preserve seed of our Father. So in Tamars case, from Judahs neglect of bestowing his Son Shelah upon her, according to his own promise and consent, (pretended at least) Gen. 38. 11. and vers. 14. When Tamar saw that Shelah was grown, and she was not given to him to wife, then she went and sate in the way, where Judah should come, with her veil, as if she had been some strumpet: and vers. 26. Judah confesseth [Page 178] it as his fault, that such incest was committed to the shame indeed of his, and of his Fathers house. She hath been (saith he) more righteous than I: because I gave her not to Shelah my Son. Hence the Apostles counsell to Parents, to dispose seasonably of their Virgins in marriage, 1 Cor. 7. 36. If any man thinketh that he behaveth himself uncomely toward his virgin, if she pass the flower of her age, and need so requires it, let them marry.
5. When you lay up ill gotten goods, as gain 5. By laying up ill gotten goods for mem. of oppression, deceit, violence, or any injustice, this layeth your Children open to reproachfull courses to themselves and you, even by the just hand of God against such injust gain, Hab. 2. 9, 10. Woe to him that coveteth an evill covetousness to his house, vers. 10. Thou hast consulted shame to thine own house.
6. When, Christian, you suffer others, yea it 6. By suffering their judgements to be corrupted. may be too forward your selves to be distilling into them corrupt principles of Religion, or furthering them in the practice thereof: but Oh how dishonourable must this needs prove to your selves, by the sad and sorrowfull consequences thereof in your Children? like that sad effect of Idolatry in those Children, Jer. 17. 2. Whil'st (vers. 2.) the Children remember their Fathers groves and altars, or like Ahaziah, 2 Chro. 22. 3. He walked in all Ahabs wayes: for his Mother was his counsellor to do wickedly: Thus Micahs Mother put him upon making that Idoll, Judg. 17. 2, 3, 4, &c. and Oh that in these Apostatising dayes, the seed of the degenerating of the posterity of Godly Ancestors, and of all their loose and scandalous courses, to the shame of their Fathers houses, had not been first laid in them, by their own Parents leavening them with corrupt opinions.
[Page 179] 2. It serveth for reproof unto Children, or 2. It reproeth children, especially those of good parents. persons in the relation of Children: especially the Children of godly parents, the Children of the Church, that even you are every way a dishonour to your parents, and reflect and put much dishonour upon them, and so sharply reproveth,
1. Such of you as scoff at, and deride such of 1. For deriding their good brethren or sisters. your godly Brethren, or Sisters, whom your Parents most respect; or do any wrong to your Brethren, or Sisters, of one, or both Parents; of the former sort was Ishmael, Abrahams Son by Hagar the Egyptian, whom Sarah saw mocking of Isaac, that beloved Childe of the promise, Gen. 21. 9. Of the Latter sort were Josephs brethren, who before their conversion, envied godly Joseph, (who brought their evill report unto Jacob, Gen. 37. 2.) because Jacob loved him above them, vers. 3, 4. and because God had shewed him in two severall dreams, that he would so highly exalt him above them, vers. 8. And out of Envy sold him afterwards into Egypt, Acts 7. 7. Such an one was Abimelech, Gedeons Son, who slew his 70. Brethren; and the Holy Ghost reckoneth it as a wicked and vile fact, done to his very Father, Judg. 9. 56. Gen. 42. 36. Jacob telleth his Sons, that they had bereaved him of his Children. Joseph is not, Simeon is not, and you will take away Benjamin, all these things are against me. Such who trample upon, and rend away good Children, they trample upon, and rend away their Fathers Crown, and Glory, for such are Children unto Parents, Prov. 17. 6. Hos. 9. 11, 12. Such reflect dishonour upon their godly parents wisdome, and zeal, as if they did misplace their respects, upon those Children who deserved not the same; But God hath [Page 180] been wont to abase such proud, envious, malicious Spirits, and to put as much, or more dishonour upon them. Ishmael, and his whole posterity, was cast out of the Church for it, Gen. 21, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13. Jacobs Sons were brought very low, inwardly, and outwardly, when so roughly handled in Egypt, and for a time imprisoned, Gen. 72. 17, 30, 33. Abimelech came to a vile, and dishonourable end, by a Stone hurled upon him from a Tower, by the hand of a woman, together with his Armour-bearers sword, Judg. 9. 57. and 56. Thus God rendred the wickedness of Abimelech, which he did unto his Father, in slaying his 70. Brethren.
2. Such Children of Christian Parents, who neglect the best time of your good, under the good 2. For neglecting their opportunities of good whil'st with their good parents. education of your Parents, under a godly Ministry, of whom it may be said, as Jer. 8. 20. The Harvest is past, the Summer is ended, and they are not saved; now such a Son, that sleepeth in that blessed Harvest time of reaping so much soul-good, is a Son that causeth shame, even to his very Parents also, as well as to himself, Prov. 10. 5. Others who know you, will be ready to censure, or at least to suspect, that your Parents were not so conscionable, in this matter of their education did not pray enough, or not so seriously for you, and so your Parents names suffer by such unprofitable burthens of the Church as you are; but let me tell you, that it very frequently happeneth, that those who get no good, under the Tuition of their godly Parents, they are left to vilest courses, and that without recovery. Its more rare if they come to good, who had not some godly seeds thereof in their godly Parents Families, if bred up to adult age there; nor Cain, nor Cham, nor Esau, [Page 181] nor Nadab, nor Abihu, nor Abimelech, nor Hophni, nor Phineas, nor Ammon, nor Absolom, nor Adonijah, nor such like, which were not good, nor had seeds of good in them, whil'st under their good Parents wing, were ever good after. And you must dearly answer one day, for those Talents of good education, and opportunities of good in your Parents Families. God will say as in another case, Prov. 17. 16. wherefore was there a price in the hand of a fool to get wisdome, since he had no heart to it? And all those helps and seasons of good which you had in such Families, will be as oyle to make your tormenting flames burn the more fiercely, and as pricks to stir up that raging, vexing, gnawing worm within you, as in that poor forlorn young man, in awakenings of his conscience, listen what it is that he howleth and roareth over, 1 Prov. 5. 11, 12, 13. Oh it is the instruction which he hath had from Parents, and others, but hated; and thou mourn at last, saying, how have I hated instruction?
It is the reproof he hath had but despised, how hath my heart despised reproof? it is the voyce of his teachers, which he hath heard, but not obeyed, I have not obeyed the voyce of my Teachers. If one might lay ones ear in the other world, at the mouth of the bottomless pit, one should hear many such desperate moans, and yellings out such complaints; so that though poor Parents suffer by such wretches as you are, at the present, yet a time will come, when you your selves shall thus clear them, and condemn your selves.
3. Such Children of Christian Parents, who take to deboist company, and take up any Ruffianly 3. For deboist company and courses. customs or courses, in your hair, in your garb, in your jovialling, and rioting, Prov. 17. 2. [Page 182] A wise servant shall have rule over a Son that causeth shame, a deboist Son, who is not fit to be trusted with any business of his Fathers, putteth shame even upon his Father and Family, as well as upon himself. Christians are spiritual Priests unto God, 1 Pet. 2. 5. & truly as it was of old, Num▪ 21. 9. the daughter of any Priest, if she profane her self, she profaneth her Father, so it is here, such profane Children as you are, you do even profane your very good Parents. Or as it is in the case of Elders of Churches, its put upon their account of blame, if their Children be accused of Riot, or are unruly: and therefore its said, Tit. 1. 6, 7. If he be blameless, having Children not accused of riot, or unruly: for a Bishop must he blameless, &c. So is it true of other godly Parents, some blemish and blame reflecteth upon them, when their Children are so culpable, such scandalous Children of the Church as you are. It is no wonder that you get no good by your Education, if given to such loose companions, and their Counsels: this is the cause of the other; as it was in Rehoboam; when those young blades gave him that boisterous counsell, 2 Chron. 11. 4. He slighted the grave counsell of those Ancient Fathers of the State: so it is here: hang it, will such companions say, what needst thou care what the old man saith? nor is it likely that ever such a Son should be better so long as knit to such comrades, Prov. 9. 6. Forsake the foolish and live, and go in the way of understanding; yea but first those companions must be cashiered; yea this also is the cause of the first branch of dishonour cast upon your Parents, by deriding of their good Children. Psal. 1. 1. There is a gradation.
1. A man walketh in the counsell of the ungodly.
2. Then he standeth in the way of sinners, & then,
[Page 183] 3. He taketh up his chair, he sitteth in the seat of the scorners; such snares are there in the way of the froward, to others, as well as to themselves, Prov. 22. 5. And so true is it, that evill communication corrupteth good manners.
4. Such Children as match dishonourably to 4. For matching dishonourably. your Parents, even to your Christian Parents profession, and gracious interests; so did that posterity of Seth, the Children of the Church, in matching with the posterity of out-cast Cain, Gen. 6. 2. The Sons of God saw the daughters of men, that they were fair, and took them wives of all which they chose; thus did Esau dishonour that blessed stock of which he came, to match into the cursed brood and Family of Cham, Gen. 26. 34, 35. And Judah did too much this way, Gen. 38. 2. and God put dishonour upon him, in that vile brood, wch came of his Canaanitish wife Shuah, even Er and Onan, whose vile wickedness, God immediately revenged. Vers. 7, 9, 10. And no wonder, since he so much dishonoured his Father, and Fathers house by that match, and so mingled the holy seed, with the people of the lands (as its called Ezra 9. 2.) And they said truly, though they spake it guilefully, Gen. 34. 14. We cannot give our Sister to one that is uncircumcised, for that were a reproach; when such matches are made by your selves, yet your Parents are supposed, if not censured by others, either to abuse their parentall Authority, in way of Commission, contrary to Gods Rules, forbidding such unequall matchings, or to neglect their Authority, in way of sin of omission of duty, for prevention of such an evill, and so your Parents come hereby to suffet reproach; besides, by such unworthy matches, vile practices come to arise, which yet were [Page 184] more reflect upon your godly Parents Honour▪ As was too evident, in that posterity of the Sons of God, and Daughters of men, Gen. 6. 2, 3, 4, 5. and in Judahs brood by Shuah, now mentioned; and in that mungrell generation, which spake half the Jewes Language, and half the Language of Ashdod. This also tendeth to undermine those direct Acts of Honour due to your Parents; such bad Husbands will be hindring the wives due respect to her good Parents, or any due reverence to them, or filiall obedience to them, or any filiall recompence of them: and the like mischief will a bad wife do in that way, to her husband, to withdraw him from giving due Honour to his good Father or Mother; as too common experience maketh it good; but God will pay such of you home, either by laying you as low as hell, in troubling, and terrifying your consciences for such courses, of which there are sometimes examples: or if not that way, yet by some notable judgements of his, exposing you to contempt, as he did those of the old world.
5. Such persons are especially to be reproved, 5. For degerating from the good precepts and practices of their godly parents and Ancestors. who being Children of the Church, Children of godly Parents, and Ancestors, yet walk not after the precepts, which they often gave you, nor in the blessed paths▪ wherein they exemplary led you, yea you steer a contrary course unto that of your gracious Fathers or Mothers, Grand-fathers, or Grand-mothers: yea some of you, who possibly have been convinced of the evill of your State by nature, and have been so far wrought upon, as to give good hops of the best things to bebegun in you, yet you also come afterwards to degenerate; like those Sons of God, Sons of the Church, Gen. 6. 2. who receive not so much as the Footsteps of [Page 185] any of the gracious wayes of their good Ancestors; such a generation are spoken of, Judg. 2. 7, 10, 12, 17. And the people served God all the daies of Joshuah, and all the dayes of the Elders that outlived Joshuah—And all that generation died, and there arose another generation after them, which knew not the Lord.—And they forsook the Lord God of their Fathers—they turned quickly out of the way, which their Fathers walked in, obeying the Commandements of the Lord; but they did not so. Your Parents and Ancestors made conscience of reading and hearing the word of God, and due meditation upon it, but you their Children, at least some of you, hardly ever look into the Bible; the great things of Gods Law, there written, are as a strange thing to you, Hos. 8. 12. If with much ado you drop in into an Assembly where the word is taught, there you fit as careless high-way-side hearers, mind not what is said, lay not up what you hear, mind most such young men and womens garbs and gestures, &c. And as for any serious meditation upon the word, you are strangers wholly to it: your godly Parents were exercised in godly conference, but you in frothy discourses, as soon as ever you are out of the Assembly, and when ever you meet with other companions, like your selves; God is never in your mouths, unless in way of profaning, some way, of his blessed name. Your Parents were wont to be much in Prayer, not alone in publick in the Assembly, or in private, in the Family, but in secret, by themselves alone in their closets, but you their Children make no conscience of Prayer, God seldom or never heareth of you by your selves alone in a corner, bemoaning your selves, or earnestly desiring that he would turn [Page 186] your hearts unto him and to his wayes: how conscionable were your Parents, of Sanctifying the Sabbath, of which you make none? you care not, if you may do it unseen of others, how vainly, or profanely you mispend that sacred time; how conscionable were your Parents, of what they spake at any time, and of their thoughts, if possible, not to yeeld to a vain and carnall thought, but to suppress it? but you regard neither what you think, nor speak: you let your minds drive, and rove after all manner of vanity and folly, and your lips even powr out foolishness; how observant were your good Parents, what company they came into, or were familiar with, that they were godly, or hopefull persons? but no company commeth amiss to you, unless they be now and then a godly person, who rather putteth you into your dumps; How tender were your good Parents of their dealings with men, to discharge a good conscience therein? of their very outward garb, what they ware, and in what fashion, and the like? but you their Children regard not what you do, nor how you deal with others, nor what you wear, nor of what Fashion, so the newest. As it was said of those degenerate ones, Deut. 32. 17. They sacrificed to devils, not to God—to new Gods, whom their Fathers feared not; so it may be said of you; you give up your selves to walk after the sight of your own eyes, and after the desire of your own hearts, Eccles. 11. 9 You give up your selves to serve your own vain imaginations, and lusts of the flesh, of the eye, and of the pride of life, which your Fathers subjected not themselves unto; if one should ask many such Children of godly Ancestors, did ever your good Father or Grand-father wear such ruffianly hair upon their heads, did [Page 187] they ever transform themselves, like Nebuchadnezzar, Dan. 4. 3 [...]. into the manner of beasts, to be so careless of their seasonable and suitable cutting their hair, as you do? that as its said of him, your hairs are grown like Fagles Feathers (which yet are not so long as womens hair, nor indeed according to the ordinary causes in nature, can mans hair ever be so long as womens, who are naturally of a moyster temper, and if that were all, in 1 Cor. 11. Its a shame to a man, even by natures law and light, to have long hair: that is, say our Ruffianly haired men, to have it as long as women; but that need not to be forbidden by Paul, or any other, for nature forbiddeth that among the number of things, not in ordinary causes, usuall, or possible, but this by way of digression;) or did your godly Parents frisk from one new fangled fashion to another, as you do? surely no; or did they ever give you examples of such loosness, prodigality, scurrility, and the like lewdness, which you practise; assuredly no; nay if your godly Ancestors and Parents were now existing upon the earth, would they now know you their posterity, theirs Sons, their Daughters? surely no, You are so strangely Metamorphozed from any likeness to your good Parents, or Ancestors. It may be confessed as it was of their Ancestors, Esai 63. 16. Abraham is ignorant of us, and Israel acknowledgeth us not, as some would have it expounded, we are so degenerate, that if Abraham, or Israel were now alive again, they would not know, or own us to be their posterity, John 8. 39, 40. Yea, do not too many of you now a dayes degenerate, whil'st your good Parents are with you Praying, and weeping many a time over you, and for you before God, and giving many a pull at [Page 188] you before Gods throne, if it might be to rescue you from the bottomless pit, into which they fear you are hasting, and many a time with tears, sometimes the Father, sometimes the Mother, in holywise adjuring, and sometimes meekly, and lovingly intreating, and beseeching, such or such a Son or Daughter; Ah dear Son, dear Daughter, that you would once at length look out seriously, after the salvation of your souls, after God, after Christ, that you would but once set upon the blessed work of Faith, Repentance, and Gospel-obedience: will you not leave these, and these vain courses, and customs, fashions, and companions, will you not be more conformable to Gods holy Rules, when shall it once be? and truly if the arising generation now a daies, too many of them begin to grow so rude and graceless, and so far to degenerate, whil'st godly Parents, Masters, Tutors, Kind red, Magistrates, and Ministers are with them, Alas! what will they do when they are gone? as Moses once said to that degeneration race of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, Deut. 31. 27. Behold, while I am yet alive with you this day, you have been Rebellious against the Lord, and how much more after my Death? so we may too justly fear, concerning too many of this arising Generating of Christians, that if whil'st we are with them, they so fast decline and degenerate, they will much more do it after we are gone. Alas! what wrack did those seven famous Asian Churches soon suffer in their degenerate posterity? and Ah! that we had not too much cause to fear as much of ours. If it were the case onely of a few of the younger generation of the very Churches, that they onely were degenerated, it were the less to be feared; But when degenerating from godly Parents, and Ancestors [Page 189] Paths and Principles waxeth so common, and even Epidemicall, in Protestant Churches here and elsewhere, under so much light, and help to the Contrary, who can but fear the worst? yea when Children grow so bold, if not impudent, in their impieties, and iniquities, as not secretly but openly, not in any way of blushing, but even in a shameless way, to be casting off the yoak of Jesus Christ, who would not tremble to think of the issue of such speaking Symtomes of degeneration, and Apostasie? what for you now to be, as he that confessed, Prov. 5. 14. I was utmost in all wickedness in the middest of the Congregation, or like those in Isaiah, 26. 10. Let favour be shewed to the wicked, yet will he not learn Righteousness, in the Land of uprightness, shall he deal unjustly, and will not behold the majesty of God; and will not this be bitterness to you in the latter end; but that I may quit my hands and heart of the blood of the souls of any such, and if blood must needs lye, that it may lie upon the heads of your selves who are degenerate Children, give me leave to do two things. To represent somewhat, first of the evill of sin in such degeneration of yours; Secondly, of the mischiefs attending the same. And because we Evils of sin in the degenerating of the Children of the godly in generall. propounded the use of Reproof, as respecting first all degenerate Children in general, Secondly such degenerate ones in speciall, who have had their inward workings upon their Spirits, seen much, felt much, promised much, and given great hopes of comming to good, we shall therefore begin with the former sort, and then fall upon the latter sort. Concerning degeneration 1. It is unsuitable to what God and his people may challenge from them. of the posterity of the godly in generall I say.
That it is most cross, and unsuitable to what [Page 190] God and his people also may challenge from you, and therefore very evill and sinfull, it may be said to you, as it was to that degenerate generation, Mica. 2. 7. O thou that art named the house of Israel, is the Spirit of the Lord straightned, are these his doings? do not my words do good too them that walk uprightly? or as he said in another case, Nehe. 6. 11. Should such a man as I flye? so, should such men and women as you, of such and such Parents and interests, be so and so degenerate? or as he said to him in that case, 2 Sam. 13. 4. Why art thou, being the Kings Son, so As by externall calling and covenant interest. lean from day to day? so here, why are such and such of you, being Sons and Daughters of spirituall Princes, and Priests before God, so declining, so degenerating, from day to day? And that this your sin may even in this first respect further appear, seriously consider,
1. That such as you are, you are in and through Holy and devoted to God. your Parents, an holy, devoted, and speciall people to God above others, and should such be as bad, or worse than others? thus when God would disswade that generation of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, from fellowship with the Canaanites persons, or practices, Deut. 7. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. This is the Argument, v. 6. For thou art an holy people to the Lord thy God, thy God hath chosen thee to be a speciall people unto himself, above all other people. So Deut. 14. 1. Ye are the Children of the Lord your God, ye shall not cut your selves, nor make any baldness between your eyes for the dead, (heathenish and Idolatrous customes) For (vers. 2.) Thou art an holy people unto the Lord thy God. So vers. 21. Ye shall not eat any thing that dieth of it self, &c. For thou art an holy people unto the Lord thy God, &c.
[Page 191] 2. Such as you are, are near unto God, in Covenant Near unto God. and Church respects, how ever formerly, in pagan Ancestors, far off: hence that speech to that degenerate posterity of Abraham, Esay 57. 19. I create the fruit of the lips to be peace, peace to him that is far off, (namely to the gentile) & to him that is near, (namely to the Jewes, which though in their sinfull and naturall estates as far off as the Gentile, yet in Covenant and Church respects near to the Lord.) Now should such, as in some respects are so near God, by their degenerate principles and practices, remove your selves so far from God? what a vile evill must this needs be? hence that way of Gods Aggravation of the sin of that degenerate posterity of Jacob, Esay 43. 21, 22, 23, 24. This people have I formed for my self, they shall shew forth my praise. But thou hast not called upon me, O Jacob, but thou hast been weary of me, O Israel—thou hast caused me to serve with thy sins, and wearied me with thine iniquities; and Oh that God had not too just a cause to take up this heavy complaint against many of you that are the posterity of the godly, in these dayes; that though made for himself, and formed for his praise, yet you have not worshipped him, or called upon him, but have been weary of him, flung off his yoke, cast his words behind your back, tyred out his patience in awaiting your return from your vain and sinfull principles, and practices, whil'st you have made God to wait the leasures and pleasures of your lusts, if he look for any service at length from you.
3. Such as you are, by externall calling, Gods His servants. houshold servants, as its said of the like, Levit. 25. 42, 55. They and their Children are my servants, saith the Lord. Now as Mal. 1. 6. a Servant honoureth [Page 192] his Master, if I then am a Master (saith God to that degenerate generation, so to you) where is my fear? If Iob accounted that so grievous in his servants, in way of commission and of omission, Iob 19. 15, 16. They that dwell in my house, my Maids count me for a stranger, I am an Alien in their sight; I called to my servant, but he gave me no answer, I intreated him with my mouth; O how ill doth God take this at your hands, and how grievous and loathsome is it, that such as dwell in his house, in his Church, count him for a stranger? he is in your sight an Alien; you will not come at this your blessed Master, you will not come nigh him, you will not understand what he saith to you; though he call you beeing his servants, by externall calling, as he did that degenerate Apostatising generation, Hos. 11. 7. My people are bent to backsliding from me, though they (his Prophets) called them to the most high, none at all would exalt him, namely by Repentance, Faith, and Obedience; no more will any of you being servants of God by calling, make God any such obedientiall Answer: yea though the Lord instruct you with his mouth, as its said, 2 Cor. 5. 20.—As though God did beseech you, we pray you in Christs stead, to be reconciled to God, yet how few of you regard these blessed beseechings and intreaties of the glorious and high God?
Besides, you also are by externall calling Gods Children, to whom God saith, as to those degenerate ones, in Malac. 1. 6. If I am a Father His Children. where is my Honour? And if the fifth Commandement require such Honour of Respect, Reverence, Obedience, and Recompence to Fathers of our flesh, and such carrying of it so by Children, as it redoundeth to parents honour (as we [Page 193] have largely declared) O what Honour of Respect, Reverence, Obedience, and holy Recompence to him; and what manner of carrying of it so as may redound to his Honour, doth God expect from you his Chldren, to whom he is not only a Father of your Spirit or Soul, as he is to all others, but a Covenant-Father? If God require that to Parents from their Children upon pain of life and death, he much more requireth this from you his Covenant and Church-Children, upon pain of loss of eternal life, and undergoing eternal death. But is that the Honour of Respect which you who are degenerate Children, give to this your Father, to have no desire of the knowledge of his wayes? As it is said of that degenerate generation, in Job 21. 14, 15. (whether those in Jobs own time, or those before the floud, of whom, Job 22. 15, 16, 17, 18.) but to wish rather what those wretches, there mentioned, that God might depart from you, in respect of any such motions which he maketh, and convictions and restraints upon your Spirits, which sometimes you meet with, and to take no delight at all in God, in his word, worship, wayes, daies, government, Saints and Servants? Or is this the honour of Reverence which you give him, to be awless & fearless of his presence, when you are in his house, when at Prayer with your Parents, or the like, and to be constantly fearless of his displeasure, or of sinning against him? Or is this the Honour of Obedience which you give him, to obey the motions of your own hearts lusts, of your Companions, of Seducers, and of the very Divell himself? but as for Gods charge, or Commands, you make light of them: So that God may say of you, as he did of that degenerate generation of old, and speak of it as inter [Page 194] horrenda, Hear O Heavens, and give ear O earth, for the Lord hath spoken, I have nourished Children, and they have rebelled against me: the Oxe knoweth his owner, & the Ass his Masters Crib, but Israel doth not know, my people doth not consider. Ah sinfull Nation—Children that are corruptors—they have forsaken the holy one, they are gone away backward, Isa. 1. 2, 3, 4. And as Isa. 30. 9. This is a rebellious people, lying Children, Children that will not hear the law of the Lord. Or is this the honour of holy Recompence, which you should have rendered to him, for all his benefits towards you? to depart from him, to vex and provoke his holy Spirit, which is striving with you (as he was with that degenerate generation, in Gen. 6. 2, 3.) to corrupt your selves, as did that other generation mentioned, Deut. 32. 5. whose spot was not the spot of Children (or of right-bred children of God) who were a crooked and perverse generation. Surely God may, and doth say to you, as he did by Moses to them, vers. 6. Do you thus requite the Lord, O foolish people and unwise? is not he thy Father that hath bought thee? hath not he made and established thee? finally, is this your being an honour to God your heavenly father, to cause the name of God to be blasphemed, and the way of truth to be evill spoken of, for your sakes? as it may be said of you, which was said of those degenerate Jewes, Rom. 2. 23. Thou that makest thy boast of the law, through breaking of the law dishonourest thou God? vers. 24. For the name of God is blasphemed among the Gentiles, through you, when such as you are by your vile speeches, carriages, opinions, or courses of life, shall occasion the prophaner sort, or enemies to God and his Church, Ironically to say, as they [Page 195] of old did of those degenerate Jewes, Ezech. 36. 20. These are the people of the Lord: So by your meanes others now a daies to say of you; Yea, these are your younger generation of the Church, these are those that are in the Covenant of grace, these are your Church-members, these are they which in their Infant-Baptism were devoted to the faith and worship of Father, Son, and Holy Ghost; these are the brood of such Puritan Ministers, and other precise followers, and the like blasphemous sarcasmes, wherin the Lords precious name, together with his Truth, Covenant, Saints, and Servants, are also vilely reproached. Again, as such Children are Gods Servants and Children, so they are by externall calling, Covenant and Church Interest, his subjects also. Of them is Gods kingdome, Luk. 18. 16, 17. Now for His Subjects. such as you are, who are the subjects of the Lord, thus to break your Oath or Covenant of Allegiance, and to reject his goverment over you by his Word, Spirit, or Discipline, like those degenerate Jewes, who said of the promised Messiah, Jesus Christ, We will not have this man to rule over us, Luke 19. 27. Hereby you do but rebel against your Lord and Soveraign, and what is rebellion, but as the sin of witchcraft? 1 Sam. 15. 23. even a hellish, execrable, and damnable crime. But to proceed to the other branches of the evill of sin, in this degeneration of such Children; In which we shall be more brief.
2. Hereby you become breakers of Covenant 2. It is a breach of Covenant with God. with God, with whom you are confederate. Yea, you hereby tear off the very seal of the Covenant, even your Baptism. Thus God, when telling Moses how that people would degenerate, he saith, Deut. 31. 20. They would break his Covenant, [Page 196] so Isaiah, charging the degenerate generation in his daies also with their sin, he saith, Isa. 24. 5. They have transgressed the Lawes—they have broken the everlasting Covenant. And as for invalidating (after a sort) of the Covenant-seal thereby, you may see it in those degenerate ones, mentioned even now, Rom. 2. 25. If thou be a breaker of the law, thy Circumcision (which to them was the seal of the Covenant, and of the righteousness of faith, as Baptism is to us, Gen. 10. 11, 13. Rom. 4. 11.) is made uncicumcision, and so ineffectuall: It is as it were torn off and trampled under foot through that sin of theirs. Now if this be so heinous a thing with men, to break Covenant with Princes, to tear off & tread under foot their broad seals, how evill is this in Gods sight? and if that breach of a Covenant made before God, even with a tyrant, by Zedechiah, were so grievous to God, that as Ezech. 17. 15, 16, 17. he saith, Shall he escape that doth such things? or shall he break Covenant and be delivered? So I may say here to these degenerate Children of the godly; shall such as you are escape the fiery displeasure of God, that do such things? or shall you that break Gods Covenant be delivered from wrath to come? no assuredly, unlesse the Lord give you repentance unto life. And consider of it in the fear of God, that Isaiah made account, that for the sins whereby those degenerate ones brake Gods everlasting Covenant, Isa. 24. 3. The earth should reel to and fro like a Drunkard, and that the trangression thereof shall be heavy upon it, vers. 20. Now if such Covenant-breaking sins of degenerate ones, be such, as they are a burthen too heavy for the very earth to bear, and such as maketh the very earth to stagger under it, like a Drunkard, me thinks [Page 197] the burthen of such a sin should make your backs and hearts ake and crack, and even reel under it, if it do not so now, yet let all degenerate ones know, that God will one day awaken your consciences, when you shall say with that terrified Apostate, degenerate Cain, My punishment, or my sin, is greater than I can bear.
3. Hereby you become grosly unfaithfull, yea 3. It is unfaithfulness and treachery to God, Ancestours, posterity, and the whole Church treacherous to your God, to your Ancestours, to your Parents, to posterity, to the whole Church. God made you his Trustees, and so did Ancestours and Parents make you their spirituall Trustees, under God, to hold up Religion, Truth, the Worship, Waies, and Goverment of Christ, when they should be gathered to their Fathers; they look at and leave you their Children to be a seed of the Church, to be as plants, to hold up Gods Orchards, (as Churches are called, Cant. 4. 12, 13.) and as lesser sets and slips to maintain the Lords Gardens, (of which Cant. 8. 12) to be the Lords hand, and theirs also, to receive his Truth, Worship, and Government from them under God, and faithfully and intirely to deliver the same to your posterity, and so to help to propagate the same to such as come after you. Psal. 78. 5. The Lord established a testimony in Jacob, and appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our Fathers, that they should make them known to their Children; vers. 6. That the generation to come might know them, even the Children which should be born, who should arise and declare them to their Children; vers. 7. That they might set their hope in God. The like course of continuation and propagation of his wayes and truth among the Gentiles doth the Lord pitch upon, Psal. 22. 30, 31. A seed shall serve him—It shall be accounted to the Lord for a generation: they [Page 198] shall come and shall declare his righteousness unto a people that shall be born, that he hath done this; hence that twofold censure of God upon the two houses of Israel and Judah, Hos. 11. 12. Ephraim compasseth me about with lies, and the house of Israel with deceit, but Judah yet ruleth with God, and is faithfull to the Saints, (namely past, present, and to come) that Tribe was more faithfull in the matter of Gods charge left with them, and they were faithfull to their godly Ancestors, or Parents, who left also the things of God to them, and they were therein also more faithfull to posterity, who would come to be spirituall gainers thereby; hitherto Abijahs speech is appliable also, 2 Chro. 13. 11. We (of Judah) keep the charge of the Lord our Ged, but yee (Israelites) have for saken him; hence that degenerate generation, in Deut. 32. 20. are said to be Children in whom is no faith, or fidelity, or trustiness, and truth in the matter of their holy charge delivered to them; and truly, if it were no more for a sprinkling of a better generation, here and there, of the godly, than for such as you are, what, in an ordinary way, would become of the way of God, of religion, of Church, within a few years? And such as you are do what in you lyeth, to break and ruine posterity, and the succession of Churches. Its true indeed, if all such fail, as Matth. 3. 9. God is able out of stones to raise up Children unto Abraham; by unlikely wayes and means, to raise up another seed of the Church: but yet in regard of second causes, and Gods ordinary way of dispensation, if all such plants, and nurceries fail, Gods Orchard and Garden-Churches must fail. 4. It is going a whoring from God.
4. Hereby you go a whoring from God. Rejoyce not, O Israel, for joy as other people; for thou [Page 199] hast gone a whoring from thy God; saith God to those degenerate ones, Hos. 9. 1. You are by Covenant as married to God, as God spake of that Apostate, degenerate posterity, when he would quicken them up to return to him, Jer. 3. 14. Turn, O back-sliding Children, saith the Lord, for I am married to you: yea, but in respect of you, that marriage Covenant is broken, as by spirtuall whoredome; of which, Jam. 4. 4. Speaking of professors, and members of Churches, that yet were turned aside from God; Ye Adulterers and Adulteresses, saith the Lord. Now how odious a sin is Adultery, with men? and surely this spirituall whordome is very heinous, in Gods sight, and deeply provoking: hence that Psal. 73. 27. Thou hast destroyed all them that go a whoring from thee.
5. Hereby you become stumbling blocks to others, 5. It occasioneth much sin in others. and occasion in them, both evils of commission and omission. Oh its an Attractive, a load-stone to draw company of other youngsters; why, there will be such and such a members, a Ministers, an Elders Son, or Daughter there: It hardens others in their evill; why I drank not, I plaid not, such a Lords day or the like, alone; such and such members, Elders Sons or Daughters did so, as well as I. I wear not such long hair alone, I go not in such and such fashions alone, I hold not such and such opinions (which you Judge corrupt) alone, but such and such Church Members, and their Children do as much, 1 Sam. 2. 17. The sin of Elies Sons (its said,) was very great before the Lord; for men abhorred the offering of the Lord.
6. Hereby you not alone cross, what in you 6. It is a crossing even of God's expectation. lyeth, the Churches, the Churches Officers, your [Page 200] Parents, your godly instructors and friends, expectations, but you do, in a sense also, cross the Lords expectations touching you, like that degenerate posterity, Esay 63. 8. God said of them, surely they are my people, Children that will not lie; so he was their Saviour, ves. 10. but they rebelled, and vexed his holy Spirit. So Esay 5. 3, 4. Wherefore when I looked for grapes, did it bring forth wild grapes? God maketh account (speaking after the manner of men, and according to the way of his generall will, and to second causes and the like) that surely they would be trusty to him, and his truth and way, and they would be fruitfull, but they proved otherwise; so may God say of such as we are now speaking of; but as that was most grievous in them before God, & severely punished in them, so is this in these degenerate ones, your crime is heinous, your punishment will be most dreadfull, if you speedily repent not.
Now as for those degenerate ones in speciall, wch notwithstanding the hopefull working they Evils of sin in the degeneration of the more hopefull Children of the Godly. have had formerly in their souls, yet have degenerated, to the dishonour, as of God and themselves, so of their godly Parents, let such seriously weigh the evill thereof: for besides those six particular aggravations, which your sin, in degenerating, admitteth of, in common with others, and of which we even now spake, there are some peculiar aggravations to be superadded to your sin in speciall; for as its said of Solomon, the Son of David, a man after Gods own heart, when he was in that degenerating way, 1 Kings 11. 9. The Lord was angry with Solomon, because his heart was turned from the Lord God of Israel, who had appeared to him twice: so I may say, in some respect, to you, God must needs be the more angry with [Page 201] you, because he hath shewed so much of your hearts, and of himself to you, and so oft been dealing with your hearts; so in the case of Rehoboam, Solomons Son, who as 2 Chron. 11. 17. for three years space was very hopefull, and with the rest of those of Israel, who repaired to him, and those of Judah, walked in the way of David his Father, and in the first way of Solomon his Father: but as 2 Chron. 12. 1. afterwards forsook the Lord, and all Israel with him; Joash, how hopefull a young man was he? when as it is said, 2 Chron. 24. 2. He did that which was right in the sight of the Lord, (for the matter of it) all the dayes of Jehoiadah the Priest; but vers. 17, 18. upon occasion of the flattering Courtiers counsell, the King hearkned to them, and they left the house of the Lord God of their Fathers; and the like is said of Ʋzziah, a very hopefull young man, 2 Chro. 26. 5. He sought God in the dayes of Zechariah, who had understanding in the visions of God, but v. 16. When he was strong, his heart was lifted up to his destruction, &c. And how many such Children of good Parents are there now a dayes, who divers years ago, gave great hopes of their saving good to their Parents and Friends? now how evill a thing is this in such as you are? and how bitter will it prove to you in the end, that thus leave off to be wise, and to do good? as it is said, Psal. 36. 2. And as he said in another case, you begin in the Spirit, and end in the Flesh, Gal. 3. As if it were not as good, alwayes to be zealously affected in a good thing, as for a little spurt of time; but that we may set this part of the admonition the closer upon the hearts of such Children, who were sometimes so hopefull, and now so much degenerated, let me shew them the heinous nature of such a [Page 202] manner of degenerating, or rather Apostatizing from such hopefull beginnings, workings, and practices.
1. Your sin is against the Holy-Ghost; albeit 1. It is a sin in special against Gods spirit. not the sin, the very unpardonable sin, against the Holy-Ghost: for you sin against him, as inlightning your minds to see so much of your selves, and wayes of God, and Christ and his wayes, as you did; and in a sort drawing you from your youthfull lusts, and delights, and sinfull practices, and bringing you on, in the best things, and wayes so far; but now you have made head against him, as did those degenerate ones of old, of whom it is said, Nehem. 9. 30. that they would not give ear to the Spirit, speaking against their degenerate courses, by his Prophets, or as it is said of that degenerate brood, Acts 7. 51. You have alwaies resisted the Holy-Ghost, as your (degenerate) Fathers did, so do yee; this sin, as it is a resisting, so it is a rebelling against the Spirit, as it is said there, of whom then God said, they are Children that will not lie, Es. 63. 5. But they degenerating, it is said, vers. 10. But they rebelled, and vexed his Holy Spirit; they therefore hereby rebelled against the Spirit, and that did not barely grieve him, but which is a high degree of distasting, they vexed Gods Holy Spirit. Now how vile is your sin, thus to resist, and rebell against, and thereby so deeply to vex him? and why should any of you vex your blessed inlightner, and one that might and was willing to be your quickener, converter, sanctifier, strengthner, supporter, and comforter, had not you your selves been wanting to his motions, and means which hee used? God may say to you, as he said to those degenerate ones, with whom his Spirit had been tampering, Mic. 2. 7. [Page 203] Oh thou that art named the house of Israel, is the Spirit of the Lord [...]raightned? Could not he breath and shine more abundantly into your minds, and hearts, in the Ministry of the word, but that you will be thus grieving and vexing of him? but why do you sin against your own souls in sinning against him, who alone must make them capable of all blessing, grace, and glory? And is this your observance, and owning of that Holy-Ghost, unto whom in your Baptism you are devoted?
2. This is a speciall sin against the grace of Jesus 2. It is a speciall sin against the grace of Jesus Christ. Christ, who in those workings, and movings of yours, was also sweetly calling and gathering you to himself, for your souls welfare: as he was dealing in like sort, with that degenerate generation, Matth. 23. 7. How often would I have gathered you, as a Hen gathereth her Chickens under her wings? but ye would not. But where could you, or can you find better soul-food, than with that blessed Hen? to which he likeneth himself there? where can you meet with more soul-warmth, than with Jesus Christ, and under his blessed wings? or where can you expect to partake of more sweetness, and kindness of bowels and love, than with the Motherly Hen? yea do not you, as much as in you lyeth, at once contradict Christs word, and the end of his comming, of which Mal. 9. 13. I came to call sinners (convinced sinners) to Repentance? You were indeed convinced sinners, but have worn out your convictions and troubles; and never went any further, to a through work of Repentance, but rather gone away further from God and good, and would give, in a manner, the lie to Christ in that gracious speech of his.
3. Is not this a breaking of that bond of Gods 3. It is a breaking the bond of Gods fear. fear, which should have kept you close to God, [Page 204] and from starting aside from his truth, word, or way? So he supposing that Job was degenerate, said, thou castest off fear, thou restrainest Prayer, Job 15. 4. And must not this needs be very grievous to the Lord?
4. Is not this to cast off the Authority of an awakened Conscience, as a vicegerent of God 4. It is a casting off the Authority of conscience. to keep his due order in your hearts, words, and wayes? and what remedy of any soul-mischiefs, where conscience is put out of its place? surely if ever God mean your souls good, he will put conscience again into is place.
5. Is not this to disgrace the wayes, and word 5. It is the casting of dirt upon Gods wayes. of God, and to cast dirt upon them, and to make the world believe, that upon triall you find them not worth the looking after, or cleaving too? hence that querie made to those degenerate ones, Mic. 2. 7. Do not my words do good to them that walk uprightly? You by your course would make men believe otherwise, but is not the affirmative the very truth: that they do good indeed to them that keep close to them? God therefore chargeth those Apostate and degenerate Jewes, Psal. 50. 16, 17. With contemptuous casting his words behind their back, as refuse things, as words that have no Authority over them, to curb and controll them in their wayes; and just so do you deal with Gods words; but will God, think you, take this well at your hands, and not make you as well, as those Psal. 50. 21. to know it to your cost?
6. Is not this to deal worse with God, his truth, 6. It is worse dealing with God, than Idolaters deal with their Idols. and wayes, than ever Idolaters dealt with their Idols, and Idoll worship? as God reasoneth with those degenerate ones, in Jer. 2. 9, 10, 11. hath a Nation changed their Gods, wch yet are no Gods? It is also to deal worse with Gods word & truth, than [Page 205] Heretiques, and Opinionists do with their Heresies and Errors, who are wont to hold them stedfastly, and constantly? as that word [...], used in Revel. 2. 14. signifieth; which hold Balaams doctrine, that is, hold it fast, hold it strongly and unmovably; and must not this be very evill in Gods sight?
7. Is not this to put your godly instructors, 7. It is to make all godly instruments to be losers. Parents, Ministers, &c. to saddest loss: even to lose the spirituall things, which (instrumentally) they have wrought in you, as it is said, 2 Joh. 8. Look to your selves, that we lose not the things which we have wrought; and must not this also be very evill in Gods sight?
8. In a word, is not this to play the beasts, and 6. It is to play the very Beasts. to fulfill that proverb, the dog is turned to his vomit, and the washed sow to her wallowing in the mire? 2 Pet. 2. 21, 22. When as in former times you were so far inlightned and wrought upon, that out of trouble for your sins, you cased your selves of them, and cast them off, and washed, and purified your outward course and conversation, but now have defiled your selves again with them, and can this be other than loathsome to the pure eyes of the Lord?
And now having represented to degenerate Mischiefs attending the degeneration of the children of the godly in generall. ones in generall, and speciall, the evill of sin, which is in their degeneration, let me also shew them the mischiefs attending the same. And first those which attend degeneration in generall. Now all degeneration of such Children of the Church, and of the godly, being a sin against more light, means and offers of grace, yea more grace it self, it is therefore the greater sin, and must assuredly provoke the Lord to more fierce displeasure against degenerate ones, than against others; the servant [Page 206] which knew his Masters will and did it not, is beaten with more stripes, Luke 12. 47. Hence when God speaketh of that degenerate brood of Children, in whom was no trustiness, no faith, Deut. 32. 20. vers. 19. He saith, and when the Lord saw it he abhorred them, because of the provocation of his Sons and Daughters. And it is given by God as a generall threat, Heb. 10. 38. If any man draw back, my soul shall have no pleasure in him; but that we may press on a little here, let all or any such degenerate off-spring of the godly know,
1. That God taketh exact notice of all your 1. God layeth up this their sin against an evill day. degenerate Acts, he narrowly and throughly eyeth them, and layeth them up against a season of Justice; thus God concludeth concerning their degenerating, De. 32. 34. Is not this laid up in store with me among my treasures? and vers. 35. their foot shall slide in due time, the day of their calamity is at hand.
2. That you cannot have any just excuse for any 2. They can have no excuse for this their sin. such degenerating of yours; yea such like words and warnings which you have had to the contrary, now, or at any other time, will one day come in as evidences against you, Deut. 31. 19. 21. That warning Song and Sermon of Moses at the plaines of Moab, its said, should testifie against them as a witness, in case of their degeneration, and Apostacy from the good wayes of God.
3. That the evils of sins of omission, or commission 3. The sins of succeeding posterity will be charged upon them. in the posterity which doth succeed you, will be charged also upon your accounts, as occasioned by your unfaithfulness, and degeneration. God, in making search into mens sins, doth it, that he might give to every man according to the fruit of his doings, as well as according to his wayes; so that if that be the fruit of your degenerate doings, that being unfaithfull in the charge [Page 207] of God, and godly Ancestors and Parents, under God, which they committed to your trust also; your posterity, and the succeeding generations become profane, irreligious, superstitious, erroneous, or hereticall; God will render to you also, according to these fruits of your doings; you shall be accounted and proceeded against, as children that are gone backward, and corrupters thereby also, (as well as otherwise) of others, Isay 1. 4, 5. As it was sometimes charged upon Lachish (possibly in respect of the Apostacy of the Danites, the Antient Inhabitants thereof, Judg. 18.) That it was the beginning of sin to the daughter of Zion, for the transgression of Israel was found in her, Mic. 1. 13. So in like sort will you be charged as the beginners of the sins of your posterity. And alas have you not sins enough of your own to Answer for, but must you answer for others sins also?
4. That Gods judgements will be more bitter 4. Gods punishments both of losse and sense will be most sad and bitter to such. and sad to you than to others. In that punishment of loss, when the degenerate children of the Lords Kingdome shall be cast out of it, Mat. 8. 11. There, amongst them, shall be sorest weeping & gnashing of teeth; the sorest, & sharpest and vexingst griefs are with them; you will be ready to curse the day that ever you came of such good Ancestors and Parents, that ever you had so many good instructions, and other good means used with you, but to no purpose; that ever you were in so fair, so near and ready a way to your eternall welfare, had you not turned so far from it, and now you must suffer the more anguish and torment by it. The punishments of sense also will be heavier upon such degenerate ones as you are, than upon others; upon Children in whom is no faith, Deut. 32. 20. God saith, vers. 23. He will heap mischiefs upon [Page 208] them, and will spend all his Arrows upon them; As that of Famine, so called, Ezek. 5. 16. That of the sword, Jer. 50. That of pestilence, Psal. 91. 5. that of Sickness, Psal. 38. 2, 3. That of thunder and lightning, 2 Sam. 22. 14, 15. That of inward horrour of his wrath, Job 6. 4. Whence the sad conditions and ends of the degenerate Children of the Church, of the Children of the godly, they are so carefully recorded in Scripture, in terrorem, that others might hear and fear; what a dreadfull condition befell wretched Cain, that he was a Magor-missabib, one that had terrour round about, he thought every one that met him in his vagrand course, would kill him? Gen. 4. How fatall a deluge befell those degenerate Sons of God, Sons of the Church? Gen. 6. 2. with Chap. 7. and 8. What a wofull state was that of degenerate Cham, that he and his posterity are condemned to vilest slavery, to be servants of servants? Gen. 9. What mischief befell many others of Noahs degenerate posterity, at the building of the Tower of Babel? how sad was Gods judgement upon degenerate Ishmael and Esau, when they and theirs came to be excluded from the Church of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob? how deplorable were the ends of the degenerate Sons of Aaron, Nadab, and Abihu, who were consumed by fire from heaven? to what sad ends came that degenerate generation (for the body of them) in the wilderness, some by fire from heaven, Numb. 11. 1, 2, 3. Some at Kibroth Hataavah, where so many were struck dead whil'st eating their quails, Numb. 11. 33. Some swallowed up alive into the bowels of the earth, opening it self for that end, Numb. 16. 31, 32, 33. Some by the plague and pestilence, Vers. 46, 47, 48, 49. Numb. 25. 9. [Page 209] Some by fiery serpents, Numb. 21. How sad were the stroaks of God upon the degenerate posterity in the times of the Judges, as that whole Book sheweth? not to mention the dreadfull ends of Hophni, and Phineas, 1 Sam. 4. and that of Absolom, 2 Sam. 18. I might adde that remarkable hand of God upon degenerate Iehoram, the Son of good Jehoshaphat, who dyed of sore diseases, his very bowels falling out, 2 Chron. 21. 1. 19. compared. You may see more of the sad ends of the degenerate Children of godly Josiah, Jer. 22. Latter times, even those in our dayes, afford many terrible and notable examples, of like nature: but I forbear instances. And if such severe judgements befall such in speciall here, O how inexpressible are those hereafter, which are your peculiar portion? then to the Jew first, even to the degenerate Jew, above other sinners, is Indignation and Wrath, Tribulation, and Anguish, Rom. 2. 8, 9.
5. That God will be farthest off from you, in your saddest houres, when you would have God 5. God will be farthest off from such in sad hours. nearest to you, when in sorest affliction, as in the case of degenerate Saul, 1 Sam. 28. 15. God no way answereth him then, God departeth from him then; so Deut. 31. 17, 18. He threatens those degenerate ones, that in the many troubles befalling them, they shall from a Conscience awakened, say, Are not all these evils come upon us because God is not amongst us? (& saith God) I will surely hide my face in that day, for all the evils which they have done in turning away to other Gods.
6. That notwithstanding all your privileges, 6. They shall be looked at, & dealt with, as if very Pagans. yet by such degenerating, you will come to be looked at, and proceeded against by God, as if but Pagans or worse, as if a very Vipers brood, as if Children of Ammonites, or Hittites, rather [Page 210] than of godly Ancestors, as if Children of the Sorceresse, & Harlot Church, than of the true Church; Amos 9. 7. Are ye not Children of Aethiopians unto me, O Children of Israel? saith the Lord, to degenerate Israelites; Isa. 57. 3. Draw near hither ye sons of the Sorceresse, and of the Whore, saith God to such like; Matth. 3. 7. Ye generation of Vipers, saith John to such like.
7. In a word, Consider, how in such an estate you will ever dare to look even your good Ancestours 7. Even their godly Parents & Ancestours will one day gladly joyn with Jesus Christ in sentencing them to eternall damnation. in the face at the day of Judgement (as sometimes dying worthy Bolton spake to like purpose to his Children) or how can such degenerate Children of godly Parents as you are, ever look for favour or pitty from your own Parents another day, and not rather upbraiding with what you have already injoyed, and not rightly improved? as Abraham is brought in, in the Parable, Luke 16. upbraiding his son Dives, with his former good things, verse 26. Son (said Abraham) Remember that thou in thy life time receivedst thy good things. Dives can have no pitty, nor favour from him, in his torment, no, (as it is said Psal. 58. 10.) The Righteous shall rejoyce, (especially at the day of Judgement) when he seeth the vengeance, (be it upon Son or Daughter) he shall wash his feet in the blood of the wicked; as that good Woman (as I have heard) who had a very degenerate Son, for whom she had oft prayed, and wept before God for many years together, and he rather grew worse than better, and God at one time in prayer having quieted her heart in himself if it should be his pleasure even to damn him, she one day called in her Son, and with sighes and teares told him, how dear a Son he had been to her, how many meanes she had used, time after time, [Page 211] both with him, and with God, to bring him home to the Lord; but now (saith she) I am content to leave thee to the Lords pleasure, although he should damn thee, wherefore, take thy course now, I have done, if thou wilt needs go on in thy sin, upon thy perill be it; a day will come, when I that have wept so oft to thee and over thee, shall yet rejoyce in the sentence of thy just damnation; which very speech of hers (as I was credibly informed) wrought much upon the young mans heart, and from that day forward, he proved really hopefull in the best things. O that the very forementioning of this might have some such blessed effect, upon some degenerate Child or other; but verily the Saints being to be assessours with Christ at the last day, in which respect its said, 1 Cor 6. 2, 3. that the Saints shall judge the world, namely of the ungodly, and so their ungracious Children also among the rest, neither Son or Daughter wil then be respected by them; and if zealous Levi in that way of divine Justice here, Know not his own Children, Deut. 33. 9. much more hereafter, where Godly zeal shall be in its perfection, and without any drosse of sinfull nature cleaving to it; Godly Parents in attesting, and gladly owning the righteous sentence of Jesus Christ against all and every sinner, saying, Depart from me ye cursed into everstasting fire, prepared for the Devill and his Angels, Matth. 25. 41. They shall know neither Son nor Daughter.
Now in all these mischiefs attending degenerating Mischiefs attending the degeneration of the hopeful Children of the godly. from the waies of God, and precepts and examples of godly Parents, those degenerate ones, who have given good hopes of better thnigs, you also have you share with others, but I would adde and present a few things more unto your sad and serious consideration.
[Page 212] 1. That it is very questionable whether ever 1. God may never come so near to them again. God will come so near you again, yea or no; he may wholy with draw, and return no more, as in the case of degenerate Saul, Rehoboam, Iehoash, and others.
2. That if he should return again, the work 2. The work will be the more painfull▪ will be more difficultly, & painfully brought on; You have broken Gods Prison, and if brought in again, you must expect more of Gods Irons to be clapt upon you. God was in setting your bones, and you foolishly breaking them again, it will be more painfull to have them set again; you have falsifyed your trust with God, and he will more hardly be drawn to trust you again, with such mercies.
3. You will be more apt to be hardened in the 3. They are rather most apt to be hardened in their way. way of degenerating and apostacy; when you once begin to turn away, you will be apt to superadde other sins, and likewise many excuses for that which drawes you away from God and good, which will but fasten and further you more in your way of degenerating.
4. That you will be more afraid of God, or to 4. They will be the more afraid and discouraged to come nigh to God. come nigh to him, being privie to your selves, how far, how long, and against how much light, you have gone from him; yea, you will grow discouraged, and at length at a point with God, even desperate in your course; As those degenerate ones, who Ier. 2. 25. say, There is no hope, but we will walk after our own devices, or like those of a like stamp, in Ezech. 33. 10. Who when called to come to God, they say, if we pine away in 5. Commonly the latter end of such, is worse than their beginning. our iniquities, and our sins be upon us, how shall we then live?
5. It is well if God leaving you, & such as you are upon your leaving of him, it befall not you wch [Page 213] is parabolically represented to befall that degenerate generation, that the unclean spirit, being to mans view gone out of them, being restlesse he resolveth to return as to his own house, and finding them empty of the Spirit indwelling in them, though swept from many pollutions of the world, and garnished with goodly common gifts of the Spirit, and the like, he returneth with seven worse spirits, and so their latter end becommeth worse than their beginning, Matth. 12. 43, 44, 45.
We have done with the use of reproof.
We come now to the second use, which serveth for exhortation.
1. To Parents. 2. To Children. Use of exhortation to Parents to use all good meanes to farther this reflect Honour from their Children.
First then let godly and Christian Parents be exhorted, So to be, and so to carry it in your place of Parents, as may further that reflect Honour due to you from Children: especially in this respect, that your Children may rise up after you, to hold up purity & power of Religion, as your selves do desire & indeavour to doe, and that your children may not degenerate there from, neither whilest you are with them, nor after your selves shall be moved from out of this world. And for this end,
First and chiefly, let good Parents take speciall care & use the utmost diligence you can, about the 1. By their good & godly education. matter of the good and godly education of your Children. I have lightly touched this formerly, I shall now more fully prosecute the same; this is expresly charged, and that as the especiall duty respecting Parents in their place, in regard of the honour due to them from their children, in their place, Ep. 6. 2, 3, 4. Honour thy father & thy Mother, saith God to Children, & hereupon annexeth, And you Fathers provoke not your Children to wrath (& so to hinder your Children from honouring of you) [Page 214] but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, and so further your due honour from them; Prov. 22. 6. Train up a Child in the way that he should go; and when he is old he will not depart from it. Would you have your Children to understand the Scriptures, and to make profitable use thereof, to their own and others best good? train them up thereunto betime. So was Timothy by his good Mother Eunice, witness that, 2 Tim. 3. 15. And that from a Child thou hast known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make thee wise to Salvation, through faith in Christ. Or would you have your Children afterwards to pray or to praise God and Christ aright? then inure them to that also betime; As those godly Parents did theirs, whence that in Matth. 24. 15, 16. There were Children crying in the Temple saying, Hosanna to the Son of David, and you may see there how Christ took it, and that he justified it, and grounded it upon the Scripture, Psal. 8. 2. Out of the mouths of Babes and sucklings hast thou ordained strength, because of thine enemies, that thou maist still the Enemy and Avenger. Christ made account that his praise was much perfected by the Hosannahs of Children, which they have been taught to utter by their good Parents. God had much glory by the prudent answer of that Child, who spake (as we formerly mentioned) at the martyrdome of Romanus, the enemie had much confusion; as Mr. Fox. saies well in his first Book of Martyrs. If you would have them believe in their old age, further them in it in their childhood and Youth. So did the Parents of David, a type of Christ, further him this way. Whence that speech, Psalm. 2 2. 10. I was cast upon thee from the Womb, thou art my God from my Mothers belly, [Page 125] and vers. 4. thou madest me hope, when I was upon my Mothers breasts, that is, very early, very betimes, in my very Childhood. Hence the blessed succession of the indwelling of faith, first in the grandmother Lois, and then in her Daughter Eunice, and then in her young Son Timothy, 2 Tim. 1. 5. This holy Parentall industry in such instructions and education of their Children, it is Gods own ordinance, Eph. 6. 4. and Prov. 22. 6. and therefore one of Gods ordinary waies and means, to effect saving good in Children; therefore in an ordinary way his Blessing is upon it, as upon any other Ordinance of his. Hence that engagement of God; Train up a Child in the way he shall go; Parents do you instruct and educate your Children well, and through my Blessing it shall come about, that they shall not alone be towardly for a time, but in their old age it will stick by them, they will not apostatize nor degenerate therefrom. Hence that ingagement of the Lord touching Abrahams faithfull care, and endeavour with his Children, Gen. 18. 19. I know Abraham, that he will command his Children, and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the Lord, that God might bring upon Abraham that which he hath promised. And here give me leave a little to clear up that place in Gen. 14. 14. He armed his trained servants born in his house: trained servants; namely to his religion, & not to warlike affaires, onely or chiefly, & so in the Margen of your greater Bibles, it is well rendred instructed, it is the same Hebrew word [...] used there, as is used in Prov. 22. 6. Train up a Child, &c. Or as the Geneva notes have it there, Train up a Child virtuously when he is young. Nor is that Hebrew word [...] whence that word [...] (his trained ones) [Page 216] Gen. 14. 14. is taken, ever used so farr as I can find in Scripture, but in a religious sense; it is used for dedicating a thing to holy use, Numb. 7. 10, 11, 84, 88. 1 King. 8. 63. 2 Chron. 7. 5, 9. Ezra 6. 16, 17. Nehem. 12. 27. Deut. 20. 5. Psalm. 30. Title. It is used in Dan. 3. 23. for the consecrating of that Idoll, which though an abuse, yet still the word noteth a religious sense of it, and possibly godly Jared the Father of Enoch did therefore call his Son [...], that is, a dedicated, a devoted one, one to be trained up, and initiated from a very Child to the Lord, and to his use, as it seemed he was, & proved a very worthy man, one that walked long with God himself, Gen. 5. and was of publick good use to others, as Judg. 11. sheweth. I have the more largely insisted upon these passages, respecting Abraham and his Family,
1. Because Abraham hath his name to be a Father of all believers, Gen. 17. 5. Who amongst them have that blessing amongst others to be accomplished, which is mentioned, Gen. 12. 3. In thee shall all families of the earth be blessed; which as in the first place it looketh to Christ comming out of Abrahams Loins, in whom they should all be blessed; so in a second place, in and through Christ, it is fulfilled in all and each of Abrahams beleeving seed, who becoming Fathers & Mothers of Families, shall also become by the blessing of grace upon their Covenant-interests, Prayers, and holy diligence in matters of education, Blessings to their respected Families throughout all the earth. So that hence also godly Parents may be incouraged to take paines in Vertuous and Religious education of their Children, in that it is a Covenant-blessing to them, in their Father Abrahams Charter for them, [Page 217] that they shall become Blessings to their Families. Hence also in one tespect among others, Christ sayed, This day is salvation come to this house, for as much as he also (Zacheus) is become a Child of Abraham, Lu. 19. 9. Hence also that Act. 16. 31. Beleeve in the Lord Jesus, & thou shalt be saved, & thy house.
2. That it might appear what a Family-church Abraham had in his house; the adult circumcised ones, were all proselited, and such as from very Childhood gave pledges of fearing God, through their good education, for they were Sons of his house, or born there, most of them (Gen. 14. 14. with 17. Gen. 23. He circumcised all that were born in his house) Such as] Eliezer is said to be, Gen. 15. 3. A Son of his house, or born there; and how godly a man he was let his works declare, Gen. 24. 2, 9, 12, 15, 21, 26, 27, 33, 42, 43, 44, 45, 48, 49, 52, 56. and how godly the rest were, may be gathered by their conscionable obedience to Abraham, who therefore could undertake that on all their behalf, mentioned Gen. 14. 23. The Angel spake also of Abraham, by experience of what was already, when he sayed, Gen. 18. 19. I have found him such an one by experience, That he will command his Children, and household after him, & they shall keep his way, he that had so done will do so: and indeed beeing most of them Sons of his house, or born there, therefore faithfull Abraham must needs see them so educated from their very Childhood, that they might walk in Gods wayes.
3. That it may be seen in our Father Abrahams Church, how exactly carefull God was that the Children of godly proselites and members of the Church, might be admitted to the seal of the covenant, & of the righteousness of faith, as it is called, Gen. 17. 11, 13. My Covenant in their flesh, (i) seal of it, Ro. 4. [Page 218] circumcision, the seal of righteousnesse of faith. Y [...] was Abrahams Church no Jewish Church; all but Abraham and Sarah, being not of Eber, but of other Ancestors: Nor was it a nationall Church; for they were all one intire congregation, in covenant with God and each other, implicitly at least, and meeting constantly in one place to wor-God together, as 600 might very well do, if that 300. Genesis 14. were doubled, that the weight of such pious educating of Children may appear, namely to be Gods appointed means of good, of grace in Children, as the meanes, for the full effecting of the promises of grace, as the end, which promises are made to godly Parents with respect to their children, namely that God will be a God to them, &c. Gen. 17. 7. and 18. 19. For so God saith to this Father, and pattern believer, He will command his Children, and they shall walk in his waies, that God may bring upon Abraham (in his Children also) what he hath spoken of him, (with respect also to his Children) Hence David in his instructing of Solomon, taketh up the like speech, 1 King. 23. 4. and keep the Charge of the Lord, that God may confirm his word, and that promise in the generall, Gen. 17. 7. being not of an absolute but of a conditionall nature. So that the greatest love and faithfulness which Parents as Covenanters can shew to God, and to their Children, who in and with themselves, are joynt Covenanters with God▪ is so to educate them, that what in them lieth, the conditions of the Covenant may be attended by their Children, and so the whole Covenant fully effected, in the promised mercies of it also to them, and to their Children.
Now this duty of good education of Children, being so weighty, and being a furtherance to the [Page 219] other duty in hand, even Childrens beeing an honour Rules concerning good education of Children. to their Parents every way, besides former things occasionally hinted, Let us here propound.
- 1. Some few rules about it.
- 2. Some motives to it. As for Rules about education.
1. Let Parents wisely observe and pry into the 1. Observe the genious bent and capacity of Children. genius (as I may call it) and bent and capacity of their Children, which way they are most biased in their spirits, and of what they are most capable, Prov. 20. 11. Even that Child is known by his doings, whether his work be pure, or whether it be right, that is, as is well noted in the Synod Bible, Children shew betimes whether they be inclined to good waies or bad, and must be dealt withall accordingly. When Themistocles was a very boy, Plutarch tells us that he would not play with the boys, but compose their differences. So Alexander the great when he was a boy, at play with other boys, and was asked whether he would wrestle after the manner of the Olympick games, yes, gladly saith he, If I might wrestle with a King. Such speaking signes gave they of an Heroick and Princely Spirit, when they were little: and so many others do, no doubt in other things.
2. When Parents by wise observations do perceive 2. Carry it wisely and suitably towards them as that their disposition requireth the bent, and bias of their Children, now let them carry it towards them accordingly. If they be strongly bent to some vice more than others, as Lying (as it is said of some, Psalm. 58. 3. They go astray from their birth speaking lies) admonish them betimes in the evill of it, represent to them what God speaketh, in especiall wise against it, what sad examples and sequels, in Scripture and otherwise, both in poynt [Page 220] of sin, and in point of judgements, are found, thereof: after which course taken, then watch them the more narrowly, and spare them not for it, if they fall into lying again, and do the like in case of a slandering disposition, or of a venerious or lustfull disposition, or a proud spirit, shewing its lofty bent after gay apparell, great and high things in the world, or a covetous spirit, shewing it self in expressions of a greedy having, and craving spirit, in them, when Children, in a gripple and nigardly temper, and the like, or a scoffing spirit, or a profane spirit, or an intemperate spirit, in matter of meat and drink, or a whimficall, brain-sick disposition, even in their Childhood and youth: spare no seasonable rebukes or correction, whereby to curb such vile dispositions in them seasonably and thoroughly. Prov. 23. 13, 14. With-hold not correction from the child, thou shalt beat him, and save his soul from hell; and 22. 15. folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him. It's Gods ordinance for the seasonable, and true redress of such evill dispositions, and the cure of such distempers of nature. If Cham had curb'd that slandring disposition earlier in his Son Canaan, it had been better for them both; if Isaac had seasonably curb'd Esau's voluptuous disposition, Gen. 25. 25. And David, Amnons lustfull disposition, that mischief had not fallen out in both their Families, mentioned, Gen. 26. 35. and 2 Sam. 13. 1, 2, 4, 15, 17. If the Jewes had curb'd those buddings out of their sons and daughters pride, or Josiah had done so with that of his Children, the whole Land had not so sinned and smarted by it, as it did, Esay 3. 5, 16, 17. and Zeph. 1. 8. If Absoloms aspiring spirit had been seasonably observed, [Page 221] and crushed by David in his child-hood and youth, It had never grown so impetuous, and mischievous as is spoken, 2 Sam. 15. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 11, 12, 13, &c. It was those Jew parents horrid sin, that they were covetous themselves, and so rather cherished, than curbed a covetous spirit in their Children, untill the Lord seeing them all, from the greatest to the least, eldest to the youngest, given to covetousness, he undertaketh the punishing thereof, to their cost, Jer. 6. 13, &c. If those parents, who might well enough have discerned a jeering spirit in those boyes, before it brake out so far, as afterwards, had seasonably curbd it in them, the wild bears of the wood had never been such executioners of the Prophets just curse against them, for that flout of theirs, come up thou bald-head, come up thou bald-head, 2 Kings 2. 23, 24. And doubtless that was not the first time that the blasphemous Son of the Israelitish woman, mentioned, Levit. 24. 10, 11. had declared the profaness of his Spirit, which if timely corrected and curbed, It had not broken out in so capitall a way as then it did. And I might say the like of all other folly, or foolish dispositions, which are in Childrens hearts naturally, which as they outwardly appear, if duly corrected and curbed, they would be removed, or driven far away, Prov. 22. 15. If Children, either by common, or saving influences of the Spirit, are more ingenuous spirits, and of better and more hopefull dispositions, Oh let parents, as they discern the same, incourage the same, all the prudent and pious wayes that may be: thus wise and gracious Rebeccah, perceiving in her Son Jacob, the specimen, and signall tokens of a plain, honest, single, open-hearted spirit, she expresseth and enlargeth [Page 222] her love far more to him, than to her Eldest Son Esau, whom she perceived to be of a more haughty and voluptuous spirit, Gen. 25. 27, 28. and amongst other [...], tokens, by which to Judge, and accordingly to incourage such laudable ingenuity, and hopefull disposition of Children, or youth, mind and observe the nature and scope of their questions, and how ready they shew themselves thereby, to search and seek after, and to understand the best things, and of weightier concernment to their souls; as a worldly covetous frame of heart is discovered by answerable questions; whence that character given of worldlings, there be many that say, who will shew us any good? (even any worldly good) Psal. 4. 6. and as their graceless spirit is described by their omission of enquiries, and asking after God. Esay 65. 1. So an inquisitive disposition after soul-matters in Children, as a better and more hopefull Omen in them, is to be incouraged by parents; Exod. 12. 26. and 13. 24. Josh 4. 21. when thy Son shall ask thee in time to come, what meaneth this, or that? then you shall say, the Lord did thus and thus; so let parents mind and encourage some better speeches, which sometimes, beyond expectation, will fall from very Children; those rarer speeches and answers of Jesus Christ, when a lad of 12. years old, Luke 2. 42, 49. though Mary his Mother did not so understand at first the full scope of them, v. 50. yet she kept them all in her heart, she had many a pondering and thought about the same.
3. Let parents carry it with a very jealous eye, 3. Carry a jealous eye over them in point of sin. and hand over their Children, in the matter of known sin against Gods rules; as Job did over his, Job 1. 5. he sanctified them daily, in that feasting time of theirs, saying, It may be my Sons have sinned, [Page 223] and cursed God in their hearts; and let parents by no means be drawn in, to consent to their Children, in any evill way of theirs, as Jacob said of his cruell Sons, Gen. 49. 6. O my soul come not thou into their secret, unto their Assembly, my honour, be not thou united: nor by any means let them own their Children in any way of an evill spirit, as Levi, who (Deut. 33. 9.) said of his children, I have not known them, Zech. 13. 3. Deut. 13. 6.
4. Let Christian parents be often Catechizing 4. Be often Catechising them and as they can best conceive and remember teaching them in the best things of their souls. their children in the principles of Religion, and instructing them in the best things of their souls; under that head of bringing up Children in the nurture, and admonition of the Lord, Eph. 6. 4. some take in this of Catechising. It was the practice of Jewish parents of old, hence that Rom. 2. 18. being instructed out of the Law, or as in the Greek, being Catechized. Aegysippus saith, That by vertue of Catechizing, there was never a Kingdome but received alteration, in the heathenish religion, within forty years after Christs passion; Julian when he would have suppressed Religion, suppressed partly Catechizing of Children, partly Schooles of Learning; the Papists (as it appeareth in the Popes Bull, before the Trent Catechize) acknowledge, that by Catechizing, the Protestants got the start of them; this milk is appointed of God, for the benefit of such Christians, which have not their senses so raryfied, as to discern so well of good or evill, Heb. 5. 12. compared with 6. verse, where the heads of Catechizing publickly, and privately, in the Apostles dayes, are mentioned; and let parents be often talking of good things, and choyce passages of the word diligently to their Children, Deut. 6. 6, 7. thou shalt teach these words diligently to thy Children, when thou sittest [Page 224] in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou lyest down, and when thou risest up, especially be pressing them to look after the weightier matters of their souls, as David did his son Solomon, to get wisdome, that principal thing, even the saving knowledge of God in the Messiah, Prov. 4. 4, 5, 7. So David, Psal. 34. 11, 12, 13, 14. Come ye Children unto me and I will teach you the fear of the Lord, &c. onely in teaching thus, let parents take the best and easiest way that may be for their capacity and memory; that they may best conceive, receive, and retain their holy instructions; it must be dropped in by little, and little; teaching proper and fittest for Children, is by precept upon precept, precept upon precept, line upon line, line upon line, here a little, and there a little, Es. 28. 9, 10, 11. Aelian telleth, Lib. 2. cap. 29. that the Cretenses as they taught their more weighty matters—as their Laws, their Praises of their heathenish Gods, and famous acts of their worthies, so for the manner of it, that they might more cheerfully Learn, and better remember the same, they taught them in way of Musicall, and Melodious Song; even Moses also, when to commend the weighty counsels of God, to be commended by them to their Children, it is in a way of a Song, Deut. 31. 19, 22. now therefore write you this Song for you, and teach it to your Children.
5. Let Parents be sure that Children whil'st 5. Let them be taught to read the Scriptures duly. Children, be taught to read well the Scriptures, 2 Tim. 3. 13. From a child Timothy was taught to understand (and as a means of it) to read the Sriptures through, and through, over, and over, often, diligently and heedfully. Oh the unexpressible wrong done to many Children by their parents neglect to have them taught to read the [Page 225] Scriptures, when they were young! here the English proverb may take place, Better unborn (almost) than untaught; onely let parents help Childrens understandings, all they can, in what they have read or heard, further the due application of it to themselves, their soul estate & condition, and be often calling them to an account of what they have read or heard, to see what they remember, understand, or improve thereof, like Christ as a Father to his Children, the Disciples, inquiring of them, Matth. 13. 51. Have ye understood all these things?
6. Let parents be putting their Children betimes, 6. Put them betimes upon holy exercises. upon actuall exercise, and practice of religious principles, and rules, which have been taught, by their parents; what religious practices and precepts you would have them to attend, and not depart from them, when they are old, train them up practically, to those very godly exercises when they are young, Prov. 22. 6. Heathen Agesilaus, when asked by one, What youth should learn in their youth? answered, such things as when they are men, they have most use of▪ Deut. 32. 46. You shall command your Children (even whil'st Children) to observe to do all these words: and therefore to practice piety, to call upon God in Prayer, to praise him, and give thanks to him, to sanctifie the Sabbath, in all the holy exercises thereof in publique, in the assembly; in private, with the rest of the Family; and in secret, in their own closets, apart by themselves. Adam and Eve had trained up Cain and Abel, their sons, to the practicals of Religion betimes; witness that their sacrificing, Gen. 4. 3, 4. as its likely before either of them were married men. Vers. 16, 17. compared. Those [Page 226] godly Jewish parents had taught their Children to pray; witness that short Prayer of theirs, Mat. 21. 15. taken from Psal. 118. 25. which in the Hebrew is Hoshia-na, rendred by the Greek, Hosanna, save (O Lord) I beseech thee—namely the blessed Messiah, rescue him from all his enemies, from all mischiefs whatsoever, carry him through his work, so as that he may save others, and the like. This practice of Children, Christ there justified and defended. Not alone old men, and young men, and maidens, but children also are charged to praise God, Psal. 148. 12, 13. and if to praise God, then also to pray to him: praising being but a part of prayer. In the 4th Commandement, God expresly chargeth the heads of Families to look to it, that not themselves alone, but their sons and daughters keep holy his day of rest; and if to keep it holy, then to be acting in all the holy exercises of the day, according to their understandings; as in reading, discourse about good things, prayer, singing of Psalms, blessing their meat, and such like; Leviticus 19. 3. every one without limitation is charged, you shall every man fear his Father, and every man his Mother, (and as a fruit and pledge of it,) keep my Sabbaths. See more Deut. 31. 11, 12. Joshua 8. 35. Deut. 16. 10, 11, 16. It was the devill in Pharaoh, who would not have had the Israelites Children to have gone with them to sacrifise in the wilderness, but to have stayed in Egypt the while their parents went about it, Exod. 5. 3. with 10. 11. and no doubt he was too busie with Christs own Disciples, when they would have hindred the good peoples Children from their neer approaches to Christ, Mark. 10. 13, 14. and its [Page 227] from Sathan, that some now adays, would not have Children, whilest Children, taught the ways or things of God, (Catechistically, or practically,) as to pray, or the like: contrary to the very grain of that Scripture, Prov. 22. 6. 7. Let them be trained up to some honest callings, especially to the Ministry, if of parts that way.
7. let parents look well to it, that none of their Children whilest young live idly, but that they be trained up to some honest, and laudable callings and imployments. Adam trained up his sons to husbandry, Gen. 4. 1, 2, 3, 4. and such of your Children as may be men capable of learning, let parents set them apart for learning; David had his Tutors for his sons, 1 Chro. 27. 32. Such capacity, and dispositions in youth for Scholastick indouments, and imployments, they also are Talents of God bestowed upon children, & would not be buried in the earth; and oftentimes as it fareth with lustier soil, being not answerably husbandred, it brings forth more weeds than other ground: So in Children of good naturall parts, and not well ordered and imployed in learning and arts, they often prove the worse; yea albeit such naturall parts should not be abused thus, but better imployed, yet as Prov. 16. 21. the sweetness of the lips, ability of sweetness, aptness, and elegancy of expression, it addeth an ornament, and grace, and force to what is spoken, it increaseth learning; and indeed in an ordinary way of common prudence and providence, although parents in some conditions may strain hard, to bring up their sons to be Scholars, it is in it self a far better portion, than barely to leave them such a portion of mony, or goods, or Lands. God himself accounts such liberal sciences among the number of his chiefer gifts, Dan. 1. 17. speaking of Daniel, and his three companions, as for [Page 228] these four Children, God gave them knowledge, and skill in all learning, and wisdome. Its spoken in the commendation of Moses, by Stephen, Acts 1. 7. 22. that he had skill in all learning of the Aegyptians; verily it was well for the Church in Moses his time, and for the Church in Daniels time, that Daniel and Moses, when they were young, were so well educated and gifted with skill in all learning and wisdome. God will reward good parents also as well as bad, according to the fruit of their doings, John 17. 10. if by the fruit of your education, & blessing of God upon the education of your Children to learning, they come to do much more good, either in Church or common-wealth, all that good will be partly put upon the good parents account also, as well as added to the good Childes score; and in particular, the more to incourage Christian parents to educate, and sequester their Children, which have good naturall parts, unto learning, in reference to the ministry in speciall sort, let me adde a word or two; let such remember Hannahs example, who in setting apart her son Samuel, presently upon his comming to be trained up under Elies tuition, for the Ministry, she is sayed herein, to lend him to the Lord, 1 Sam. 1. 24, 28. compared, and cap. 2. 20, 21. it appeareth that she lost nothing by this loan. Remember also what a favour and wonder of bounty, and faithfulness of God is extended to you, that God will take any of your children, for such an imployment of his, and of his Church, namely for the Ministry; amongst three of the most notable acts that God did for Israel, next to that of bringing them up out of Egypt, & to that of destroying the Canaanites for them, Amos 2. 9, 10. this is reckoned one, I raised up of your sons, for [Page 229] Prophets; to conclude, remember also what an honour God putteth upon your Children, and what favour he sheweth them therein, 1 Tim. 1. 12. I thank Christ Jesus our Lord (saith Paul) who enabled me, for that he counted me faithfull, putting me into the Ministry; when God would honour Phinehas, he putteth this upon him, as by a perpetuall Covenant, that he and his children shall be the Lords Priests, Numb. 25. it was the honour also that God put upon the tribe of Levi, that for Levies zeal in that business, at Massah and Meribah, his Ʋrim and Thummim, his Priestly indowments and ornaments, of Priestly imployments should be upon him, Deut. 33. 8, 9. it was the honour at first put upon Israels first-born, only to be the Lords, and for the Lords Ministeriall service; whence, Exod. 24. 5. and he sent the young men of the Children of Israel, their first born, who offered burnt offerings and sacrificed peace offerings of Oxen unto the Lord; afterwards indeed in honour of the Levits, the Levits were taken to be the Lords, or for the Lords Ministeriall service, and bestowed upon Aaron, and his sons, who successively were to be Gods high Priests, 3 Numb. 12. 41. and cap. 8. 16, 19. compared; it must needs be an honour to the ministers calling, and such as are therein conscionably imployed, that the blessed God in his counsels, respecting the souls welfare of his people, which in themselves, and by nature were rebellious, to the intent that by his blessing upon the Ministry in their hearts, God might come to dwell amongst them; he ordered it thus, that Christ dying, and rising again, should ascend into heaven, and there receive from his father as an honourable boon of favour, gifts for men, even for his people in themselves Rebellious, that God [Page 230] might by his blessing thereupon dwell amongst them, Psalm. 68. 18. upon his actual ascension, as Paul expresseth it, Eph. 4. 8, 11, 12, 13. He gave those gifts, so received, to men, to his people, and Church; That is, as the Apostle expoundeth those gifts to be, vers. 11. He gave some Apostles, and some Prophets, and some Pastors and Teachers, for the perfecting of the Saints, for the work of the Ministery, for the edifying of the body of Christ, till we all come in the unity of the faith and a perfect man, &c. No greater honour surely than this, to be given, as a Coronation-mercy, to Christ ascending, and from Christ given back again, as his Coronation Favour, and Bounty to his Church, for such high, holy, and honourable ends; nor need I say more in honour of your children, If becomming faithfull Ministers; their Scripture titles do Emblazon that sufficiently; Ministers being called, Angels, Rev. 2. 1. Embassadours, 2 Cor. 5. 20. Stewards, 1 Cor. 4. 1. Watchmen, Ezek. 3. 17. Co-workers with God, 1 Cor. 3. And many other titles of honour which he is pleased to crown Ministers withall.
As for motives I will but name two or three. Motives to good education of Children. 1. They are the Lords, more than ours.
1. Our Children are more the Lords than ours, by Covenant-right, by our own act of devoting them to him in Baptism, Matth. 28. 19. and many other waies, Ezek. 16. 20. Let Parents therefore bring up their Children for God, in the best way they can.
2. Education will greatly difference our Children 2. That will honourably distinguish them from others. from others not so well educated, as Lycurgus, when he would convince the Lacedaemonians of the benefit of education, he taketh two whelpes of one litter, the one he traineth up to Hunting, [Page 231] the other not, the one proved of use to the field, the other was good for nothing, but for a cur in the Kitchin; and experience witnesseth, that ordinarily persons well educated, become of very publick and good use, more waies than one, where ever God casteth their habitation, others, not so educated are little serviceable, in any matters of publick concernment. Socrates used to say, that many Mens Sons who were without education, were like couragious Horses without well ordering and government, becomming very Asses, or as it might be added, resty Iades. I need not apply it, its easily understood.
3. The honour of good education will be 3. Children also will have the honour of it: the sin of the contrary will lie upon the Parents. partly the Childs, and will partly reflect honour upon the Parents, As that of Augustus, who so well educated his Sones, that what they spake, he would have them speak it openly, and then have the Speech (as matter of worth and note) publickly recorded: But in neglect of good education Childrens sins will be charged upon Parents, As in Elies case of neglect of well educating, and Fatherly watching over his Sons, Hophni, & Phineas, 1 Sam. 2. 29, 30. he is charged with kicking at his sacrifices, why have ye kicked at my sacrifices? &c. The very Heathens, by natures light so took this; hence the Lacedaemonian Ephori, they punished a certain Father, for suffering two of his Sons to fall out, and to fight one with another.
4. It may somewhat awaken, and move Christian 4. Even Heathens have been much for good education. Justin l. 3. Parents to a more conscionable care in this matter of well educating your Children, to consider some of the Lawes, Acts, and speeches, of the very Heathen, about this very particular. Lycur-the Spartan Law-giver, commanded that Youth [Page 232] should be brought into the field, not into the Markets that they should spend their first year not in Lxury, but in work and Labours; And the Spartans had another Law, that if any of their Free-men neglected the discipline of youth, he should be disenffranched; Aelian also speaketh of another sore punishment which the conquering Mytilenesians imposed upon their revolting associates, that their Children should not be trained up to the liberall Sciences; Plato was wont to reprove this as a grosse evill in those of his times, that men would bestow all their care and paines in getting Riches, but took little, or no care about their Children, unto whom they were to leave their Riches. When one answered Aristippus, that for a thousand drachmes which he demandded to bring up his Son to Learning, that he could buy a servant; nay, saith the Philosopher, you shall have two servants, to wit, him that you buy, and your own Son too. Diogenes sometime said, he had rather be a Ram or sheep of a Megarensian, than his Son, whereby he declared, that the Megarenses took more diligent care of their Cattel, than of their Children. To conclude with one admonitory Item to some in these daies, who are secret enemies to catechizing Children, and bringing them up in Learning, Let them tremble to think with how like a spirit they are acted to that of that notorious Apostate Julian, who designing the extirpation of the Christian Religion, thought no way better, than to put down catechising and Schooles of Learning: as for other Parents who would full gladly bring up some of their Sones, who have naturall partes for Learning, but through Idlenesse or Voluptuousnesse, or [Page 233] the like, they will not be drawn to attend it, or to be trained up to it, let then some other way punish them, with suitable epressions of Parentall distast and displeasure. Solons law this way, was somewhat too harsh, that if Sons would not be drawn by their Parents to Learning, their Parents should deny them necessaries; but yet Christian Parents would do somewhat this way, that such Children should know themselves, and sufficiently see cause to bewail their folly and errour. I have been long in this first way of Parents furthering Children in being an honour to them, because it is of great moment; we shall be briefer in the rest.
2. Then let Christian Parents, as a help to the said end, be sure to leave your Children under 2. By leaving Children under Gods ordinances and good government. Gods ordinances purely & powerfully dispensed, in the Church, and under good government in the civill state. The Children of Israel would not leave one of their Children in Egypt, Exod. 10. 9, 10. Where God pure Religion was not, nay, where sacrifices to the Lord was an abomination, Exod. 8. 27. and where the government of the state was tyrannicall; these better-minded people of Israel, when the godly Priests were put down by Jeroboam, and removed to Judah, under Rehoboham, and when Jeroboam set up corrupt unworthy fellowes to be priests, they also removed themselves and families to Jerusalem, 2 Chron. 11. 13, 14, 15, 16. Hence that enquiry of the company of the godly, Canticles 1. 7. Tell me, O thou whom my Soul loveth, where thou dwellest, and where thou causest thy flock to rest at noon? that parching time of enemies raging against the truth, waies, and people of Christ, to which Christs answers, vers. 8. Go [Page 234] thy way forth by the footsteps of the flock, (the rest of my people) and feed thy kids itttle ones by the shepheards (godly Magistrates & Ministers) tents. Alas, for us, and ours to go where Gods pure ordinances or goverment is not, it is to expose our selves, and them to, to soul-ruines, as David said in that case, 1 Sam. 6. Cap. 16. They have cast me out this day from the Lords inheritance, (where his ordinances and Ministers and people are) saying, Go and serve other Gods—their actions, in driving me out amongst strangers to Gods pure Religion and Lawes, do even as it were say, Go, and serve other gods, putting me upon that temptation to it. But by leaving our Children under good ordinances and goverment, we do hereby greatly further them in the best things, and thereby also in becomming an honour to us.
For 1. They are furthered that way by your godly Ministers there; and the pure dispensation of the word and ordinances by them; when such Fishers are upon the Churches banks, your fish of all hand great and small are wont to be caught and drawn to the Land, Ezek. 47. 8, 9, 10. by John Baptists Ministry (as we before shewed) all is brought to rights 'twixt Children and Parents, Mal. 4. 6. He shall turn the hearts of the fathers to the Children, and the hearts of the Children to the father.
2. They are much helped that way by the Churches and Saints Christian watch over them, Counsels, instructions, and seasonable admonitions of them, and prayers for them. Peter, as an Apostle, having all virtuall, Apostollical, and Church [Page 235] power in him, is charged with the feeding, teaching, and ruling, of Christs Lambs, as well as elder sheep, Joh. 21. 15, 16. The Children of the Church have a beneficiall privilege, that they must be watched over, kept from wanderings, searched out if started aside, and brought in if gone astray, healed if diseased, cherished and nourished up by all holy meanes, of which they are capable, kept to their pasturage, watering, folding, and the like.
3. They will be much helped by the good civill governours meanes also, who is a nursing Father unto the Church and to her little Children, Jsa. 49. 23. and who is to take magistraticall care in speciall sort, of the education of Children. As even the heathen Aristotle saies it, [...]. Arist. polit. l. 8. c. 1. That it is an unquestionable thing to all men, that it especially concerneth the civill Law-giver, to look to and make lawes about the education or disciplining of youth, which being not attended (saith he) in States, it overthroweth them. It was one of Lycurgus his Lawes, to restrain the carelesness of Parents in educating their children, that after Children were seaven years old, their Parents should not breed them up as they list, but they should be disposed to certain companies of Children, to be excercised to good instructions, and discipline, and when grown up to be Youths, they should mispend no time without instructions and regulations; and no doubt that Spartan state flourished the better, for that and other like Laws of Lycurgus, as stories tell us, God himself maketh [Page 345] account that a godly ruling Eliakim, is of great use to his people, in respect of their offspring or Children, whence that in Esai 22. 20, 24. in a word, the Lord doth promise it as a most advantageous privilege in the daies of the Gospel, both to the godly returning Jewes, and to their Children, that they shall be in his Church and under his blessed ordinances in his Church, in which he will be present: his sanctuary shall be amongst them, Ezek. 37. 25, 26. and that they shall be under the goverment of Christ (under the name of David) Ibid. and that not alone ecclesiasticall in the Church, but civill also, in their Christian-state and Common-wealth; all goverments civill and sacred, being in a diverse respect Christs: delivered to him of the Father, Matth. 28. 18. and by him to Christian rulers, Prov. 8. 15. as King of Kings, and Lord of Lords.
3. Let Christian Parents for the furtherance of their Children, being an Honour to them, take special care to maintain peace among their Children, and to take away all occasion of breaches among them in after times; this was Abrahams care in his life time, to give Returahs Children their portions; and so to send them away, farther off from Isaac who was to hold on Abrabrahams Honour, as a Covenant and Church-Father, &c. Gen. 25. 5, 6. In defect of such Parentall care, worse matters have fallen out in Christian Families, to their Parents great dishonour.
4. Let Christian Parents also for the end mentioned, take speciall care of the well disposing of their Sons and Daughters, in Matiage: So did Abraham for his only Son (as God in a sense called him) Isaac, Gen. 24. 1, 2, 3, &c. So did Isaac, [Page 235] and Rebeckah for Jacob, Gen. 28. 2, 3, &c. Having smarted for the contrary neglect in Esau, Gen. 27. 46. and both Isaac and Jacob proved an Honour to their Parents, but Ishmael and Esau not looked after that way, by their Parents, were rather a reproach to them who begat them. Hence that charge of God to Jewish Parents, to look much to the disposing of their Children in Mariage, Deu. 7. 3.
Lastly, let Christian Parents who would have their Children be an honour to them, lay up many prayers for them, for that end, and accordingly exercise faith also in Gods promises, for bringing the same to passe, Psal. [...]0. 16. Let thy glory appear to our Children, and then vers. 17. Let thy beauty be upon us, so Psalm. 144. 12. It is one great part of the matter and scope of their prayer, that they may have an hopefull, honourable, and usefull posterity, even as growing plants, and as choise polished corner pieces of a Palace; and when Hannah was now about disposing of young Samuel under Elies Tuition, 1 Sam. 1. 23. all Hannahs prayer is this, onely the Lord establish his word: even that which he hath promised, respecting this our Son. And the godly, Psalm. 102. 28. are brought as acting of faith for this end, the Children of thy servants shall continue, and their seed shall be established before thee; and if thus to continue before God, then such as should honour Parents also, both in a direct and reflect way, as a meanes under God, of their living long, and continuing of them, in the Land which God giveth them.
Thus much for the Exhortation respecting Parents.
2. It is of Exhortation also to Children, or [Page 238] unto persons, as in the relation of Children, (whether Children in years, or grown persons) to be an honour to your godly Parents, especially, by imitation of what is good in them, and following their gracious counsels, and by holding on in the truths and waies of God, wherein they have taught and led you, without ever turning aside therefrom. For which end, let me briefly propound, 1. Some motives.
2. Some helpes.
The Motives to it may be such as these.
1. In that such good interest of Children, and such godly precepts and examples of Parents, which are layed before them, they are a special talent of mercy, and therefore God expects that you should make an honourable inprovement of them; Solomon speaketh of the same thus, as his mercifull advantage, Prov. 4. 3. For I was my Fathers Son, vers. 4. He taught me also, and verse 10. Hear O my Son, and receive my instruction, and the yeares of thy life shall be many, and so be an honour every way of Parents, as a meanes to that end, and then addeth, vers. 11. I have taught thee in the way of wisdome, (namely, instructively) I have led thee in the right paths, (namely, exemplarily;) the like holy advantage did they make of that counsel and doctrine of their Fathers, Psalm. 144. 1. and David likewise maketh advantage of his Mothers interest in God, Psalm. 86. 16. and Psalm. 116. 18. Now if this be a talent, it must be accounted for one day, and Children had need look that they make answerable returnes. Parentall nurture and admonition, and Christian education is an holy advantage to such Children, above others that want the same, As being Gods ordinance [Page 239] for Childrens best welfare, as was shewed before. When Solomon had charged his Son to keep his Fathers command, and not to forsake the Law of his Mother, Prov. 6. 20. verse 23. he addeth this reason, for the commandement (even of a godly Father) is a lamp, and the Law (even of a godly Mother) is light, and reproofs of instruction (given by Parents also to Children) are the way of life, Prov. 29. 11. The rod and reproof give wisdome: namely, as Gods appointed means, in the use whereof he will give it to Children. Godly examples are also very forcible and helpfull, hence the godly are said to be blessings in all places where they are cast, Isa. 19. 2. As Husbands may be wonne to God & good, while they behold the Godly and wise conversation of their wives, 1 Pet. 3. 1. So may a child by the gracious example of godly Parents; yea, such children have the superadded advantage of their good Parents, and Ancestours Covenant interest, Prayers and blessing, Gen. 49. 26. The blessings of thy Father, (saith, Jacob to his Son Joseph) have prevailed above the blessings of my Progenitors, every godly Ancestour and Parent, contributeth something to the Childs blessed stock, besides the blessed advantage which such Children have to be an Honour to God, and to their Parents, by the very Entail of grace by Promise and Covenant of God, from their Parents unto them, Deut. 30. The Lord will circumcise thine heart, and the heart of thy seed—to love him, &c. and Isa. 59. 21. The word and spirit in the mouth of the Ancestours, is promised to the suceeding Children, let Children then of the Church of the godly, look you husband this holy advantage the rather to Gods and godly Parents Honour.
[Page 248] 2. In that the posterity of Papists, and Mahumetans, will follow the tract of their parents instructions, and examples, and will by no means depart therefrom; and shall not such children as you are, much rather follow your godly teaching and leading Parents, without departing from their blessed counsels and examples? God forbid any should do otherwise.
3. In that otherwise if you will not do thus to the honour of your godly parents, verily then, all the blessed words which your good parents have urged, and charged, and that as from God, by their parentall authority, upon you their children, they will come in, another day, as evidences against you, according to that phrase concerning Gods word delivered by Moses to the Israelites, and by them to be commanded to their Children successively, in case of their Apostacy, it's said, this Song shall be Gods witness to testifie against them, Deut. 31. 19, 21, 26.
Touching the helps to further you, in being such an honour to godly parents, they may be such as these.
1. Take heed of what tendeth to dishonourable degenerating, and Apostacy from the gracious counsels, and examples of your godly Parents and Ancestors: and for this end, take heed of 1. corrupt principles, or practices in Religion, for they tend to Apostacy; hence the Apostacy of those hopefull beginners in 2 Pet. 2, 19. 20. whil'st corrupt libertine, principles are distilled into them, and imbraced by them, they are intangled again and fall off, 2 Tim. 21. 16, 17. Timothy must avoid such profane and vain bablings (such the Apostle termeth their false doctrines) because they tend to ungodliness, and their word and doctrine, like a [Page 241] Canker eateth out the heart and life of Religion where it taketh.
2. A worldly spirit; that causeth degenerating in hopefull persons; that hopefull young man in Mark. 10. 20, 2 [...]. was spoiled by it; so was Saul, Judas, Ananias, and Saphira, Demas, and all those professors, which so far out-go those of the high way, and stony hearers, even, those of the thorny soyl, they come to be choaked by the thorny cares, desires, occasions, and contentments of the world, so that no fruit of theirs ever commeth to perfection.
3. Pride; this ushereth in even this fall also: instead of him whose beart is lifted up, in Hab. 2. 4. it is in Heb. 10. 35. if any man draw back: the one ushereth in the other; let Children, hopefull ones specially, beware of this.
4. Wantonness under outward prosperity, plenty, peace, liberty, civill and sacred; Deut. 32. 11. Jesurun waxed fat, and kicked, turned against God. So those Nehem. 9. 22, 26. Hence God warneth them then to take heed, that when in Canaan they have all they can desire, in a manner, that then they forget not, and forsake not the Lord, Deut. 8. 10, 11, 12, 13, 14. let the posterity of the godly here and elsewhere take heed of this spirituall wantonness, which ushereth in Apostacy.
5. Bad matching; this caused Jehoram, good Jehoshaphats Son, so vilely to degenerate, namely his matching into wicked Ahabs stock, 2 Chro. 21. 1, 2. bad wives out-landish women, caused even wise Solomon to sin, and for a time to degenerate, Nehem. 13. 26. let young persons especially take heed of this.
2. Let such Children of the Church, of the [Page 242] godly, engage themselves personally, in solemn wise before the Lord, and his people also, as well as privatly, to walk according to God, and those godly counsels and examples of their good Parents and Ancestors, and by his strength and help, never to turn away there from; good Ruth did so privatly, when she so solemnly vowed before God, and her Mother-in-Law, that she would go with her, be with her, partake in weal and woe with her, own her God and people, and only them, for hers, and nothing but death should hinder the same, Ruth 1. 15, 16. whither thou goest, thither I will go, thy God shall be my God, and thy people my people; God do so to me, and more also, if ought but death part me and thee; she engages implicitly to all honour of her, both direct, to honour her with all honour of respects, reverence, obedience and recompence, and reflectly, to be an honour to her also, all which may be very well gathered out of that speech of hers: as I might particularly evince, but I forbear: Nehem. 10. 28, 29. the Children of the Church there, their sons and daughters that could understand, (as well as their Parents) came publickly to enter into an oath, and curse, to walk in Gods Laws, to observe and do all his Commandements; and if Churches would call upon their Church Children, who are of understanding, personally to renew the Covenant of God, made by their Parents on their behalf, such a bond would the more engage and unite their hearts, by the Lords blessing, to the good wayes, and things of God, to his and their Parents Honour.
3. Let such Children, according as the Lord helpeth them, eye, and plead with God, his own [Page 243] words, undertaking this in effect, that they shall walk after the blessed precepts, and practices of their godly Parents and Ancestors, and so be an honour to them; this is held forth in that promise of God made with reference to his Kingdom and Church in all Nations amongst the Gentiles, Psal. 22. 27. with vers. 30, 31. their seed (as the Geneva reads it) shall serve him, it shall be counted to the Lord for a generation, they shall come, and shall declare his righteousness unto a people that shall be born, that he hath done this; if God undertake that this seed of Gentile-believers, shall hold up Religion after their Parents, and convey it to their next generation, what can godly Parents desire more for their Children, or, their children desire for themselves? they shall hereby greatly honour God, his truth, wayes, and government, and greatly honour their godly Parents, their instructions, examples and prayers, beside that good that will thereby come to themselves, and their own souls and posterity also: O let such children then intrench themselves within this and such like blessed strong holds and places of spirituall refuge. And so at length we have dispatched our discourse about this so necessary a subject, and the blessing of our gracious God be upon it.