[...] Opinion have rendred them unfit or unseemly for Husbands, are yet for Wives not only decent but commendable; and to common welfare so necessary, that the neglect of them is seldom without decay: Hence that thred-bare saying, If you will thrive, look how you wive. In which single respect, the very sloth and incapacity of most women now-adays (especial­ly Heirs and Fondlings, bred even to a contempt of Huswifery) is without profuseness a defect scarce to be repair'd by fortune. Wherefore to one that hath alrea­dy a solid Estate, not to be acquir'd, but well managed & gradually improv'd, 'tis certainly upon this account more profitable to purchase the Wife, whose thrift is it self a yearly, nay weekly revenue; than for one to compass a lump of Money with an excessive Rent­charge atending it: But if to such defect should be added the affectation of our present Court and City­pomp (and what better can be there expected?) no Bank confines such a Torrent, nor can any Pile of wealth afford Fewel for such a Flame; the quantity serving only to accelerate the Consumption.

For doubtless to that Sex an Expence belongs, which though never so demurely carried, far exceeds that of Men; but meeting with Quality and Vanity, knows no measure. Maids, I confess, acting purely for themselves, and for the most part making a Vir­tue of Necessity, may perhaps with their singular affected Parsimony, with other notable shifts, smo­ther and palliate this expensive humour: inded it is their Master-piece so to do. But then in the change of their condition (and withal concernment, it should seem, by Marriage) like an unnatural restraint, with­out extraordinary discretion and kindness to their [Page 3] Husbands, it breaks forth with double violence: their Train is much longer, their Visits and Collati­ons more sumptuous and frequent, their Dresses more curious and elaborate than ours; their Journeys in­finitely cumbersome and expensive: Not to mention there Childbeds and Gossipping, to the due equipage whereof all Trades must conspire: yet where are the men that consider this? Can we then expect it from Women? Their partiality is such, that though they cause double the Charge, yet if they bring but half the Estate, they reckon, that as purchasers they have right to spend: a prejudice with our Gallants so gene­ral, but withal dangerous, that were it duly weighed, it would strike at the very root of Marriage. Suitors therefore we see are obliged by no means to consult their Reason, much less their Arithmetick; Ignorance may well be styled the Mother of their Devotion.

Howbeit I would not be construed herein to de­claim against Marriage: one may I hope blame the Corruptions of Lawyers without irreverence to the Law. Error is but a Foil to Truth, and by redressing abuses, the regular use is best establish'd. Marriage we know is a state necessary both to the Conservati­on and Comfort of Mankind, consecrated by God himself, who would never have instituted and so recommended it, were it not most consistent with our well-being; but the best perverted, proves the worst: and in nothing hath there been a greater departure from primitive intention than in Marriage, to the bane and scandal of Society.

The root of this, as of all other evils, is Covetous­ness; but by the fate of irregular Appetites so dazled, that it shoots at random very wide of the mark. To [Page 4] such as observe the shrewdness of Covetous men in all other pursuits, it may seem a miracle, that herein they should act with so little foresight; and might perhaps be referred to divine Justice, thus arraign­ing their ill-gotten Estates. But alas, their Example, with the fame they carry for wisdom, hath misguided persons of better Principles; whom to reclaim were methinks a publick service: Wherefore leaving those to their incorrigible vice and delusion, I frame my dis­course to you, who may communicate it to some ho­nest Gentlemen of your acquaintance, where you judge it needful or useful.

Our Gentry may now be considered under four Conditions or Capacities; viz. Such as have little or nothing to trust to; such as have bare Competen­cies; such as have fair Estates, but encumbred or ex­pectant; and such as have ample and clear For­tunes.

How needless it is for the first of these to marry needs no proof; yet if some favourable opportunity should tempt them so to endeavour the improv­ing their condition, which they can hardly much impair, they are partly excusable: only let them not too much triumph in their purchase, nor be sur­prised if they mend not by their change of Climate, for some that have tried will inform them, there is no Villainage to the Apron-tenure. If in any case such Matches have success, 'tis with Cadets of the Nobility, whose high Birth serves to ballance the Wealth, and bridle the arrogance of women.

The second rate of Gentlemen in former times were observed frequently to advance their Estates by Marriage; but it was in the Golden age of Female-innocence, [Page 5] ere they had tasted the Tree of Know­ledge; whilst their Breeding was strict, their Appe­tites regular, their Wills governable, and even Heirs were not therefore the worse Wives: The Scene is dangerously altered; those Pleasure▪ boats now a­days carrying such Sail, as without skilful and hap­py Steerage must needs overset in our Seas. Hence with Gentlemen of indifferent Estates, when they go a Fortune-catching, it commonly fares as with the Dog in the Fable; their prizes in the upshot proving worse to them than Blanks: our Politicians therefore recommend to them Marriage Alamode; Yet not to flatter the Vice and Prejudice of the Age, I dare maintain, That prudent Wedlock is even for such the more thriving state, and no such Bugbear as some of our Wits represent it; there being in­stances enough of our best Gentry with moderate Estates, both living honourably & providing well for Posterity: and nothing now more familiar than to see some rich with 500 l. a year, to the envy and reproach of others that are poor with their Thousands: For as Citizens say of their Shops, Home seldom fails to keep those that keep home.

To Gentlemen of the Third Rank, viz. whose Estates are expectant or incumbred, 'tis indeed more expedient to marry for Riches, yet is not such obliga­tion equal to all; neither indeed seems it requisite but in particular cases, where discretion perhaps would rather dictate the preferring of single Life, or at least the deferring of Marriage; for Instance; If to a certain fair expectance there be for the pre­sent only a bare pension.

I know it is a Maxim authorised by current pra­ctice, [Page 6] That encumbred Estates are best cleared with Marriage-portions; but it proves a treacherous Cure, neither indeed is it a proper expedient: For if the Estate be great and the Encumbrance comparatively small, an easie sale would best discharge it, leaving the Patrimony sound and the Owner free. And one who having thus settled his Affairs, and afterwards weds to his best Choice, shall sooner thrive and pur­chase than the most prosperous Fortune-catcher. But if the Debt be a dangerous Sum, the payment of it by Marriage is next to desperate; it faring with such Adventurers as with Privateers, who, betwixt the charge of Rigging, hazard of missing and triumph of getting Booties are in all Events destined to be Bankrupts. Like cold Drink in a Fever, it cools the mouth, but inflames the blood; and at best helps no otherwise to patch up an encumbred and declining Condition, than doth an outward Prop to support a crazie Building. Much might however be alledg­ed in excuse for those, whose exigencies so stimulate and perplex them, that they neither freely act nor clearly judge; whereas our Gentlemen of large and entire Estates, when they wrack upon that Coast, are purely to thank themselves.

You will tell me, Marriage now lies under great obloquy, as a Phlegmatick state of Life, yielding no variety but of trouble; fit only for the blew or Lea­thern-apron, but uneasie for men of generous Minds and free Fortunes, presumed not to brook such re­straint of their Conversations and Appetites: 'Tis represented as the Purgatory of Persons and Canker of Estates; nay, the Rules of the King's Bench (if some of our Wits may be credited) have more El­bow-rom: [Page 7] for oft methinks it proves so, the greater their reproach, who so fondly abandon their true interest, and disparage it; there being certainly no real inconvenience which well-advised Marriage imposes, no honest freedom which it denies to men of plentiful Estates; rather many advantages pecu­liar to it, it being their great Prerogative, that their Choice is in effect unconfin'd: For we daily see▪ that the owner of a fair and plentiful Revenue, dispensing but with Portion, needs not despair of suc­cess almost in any other pursuit; and 'tis no less certain, that to persons of such Fortune Portions are superfluous.

The most common and plausible excuse of our ig­noble Matches, is the same Scare-crow which frights so many from marrying at all, forsooth, the appre­hension of being over-charged with Children, to the clogging of their Estates, or at least abridging of their Pomp: A consideration at best otherwise: For since by singular Providence, even Families of ordinary Rank and Estate, in stead of being bur­thened, are notably supported by numerous Posteri­ty. How secure from that danger must our eminent Landlords be! rather what Latitude have they for Bounty, with allowance for some Vanity!

But there is one mistake common to great Land­lords and great Princes, or rather Parallel be­tween them. Great▪ Princes were ever noted to place all their Glory in Conquest, supposing, that if with infinite Charge and Hazard, to the oppression of their subjects and neighbours, they added one little Province of their own acquiring to their vast Dominions and Titles, they gave a sufficient account [Page 8] of their Sceptres: Whereas they then pursue the real Interest of Empire, when by due execution of good Laws, and careful obedience of their People, they govern more securely, nay, more absolutely than the Sultan doth with his Scemitar; rendring small Territories equivalent to Monarchies. With like prejudice great Landlords, even those that car­ry the fame of Wisdom, amuse and perplex them­selves in pursuit of somewhat to be acquired by Mar­riage or purchase, no doubt as a Trophy of their good conduct; forsaking in the mean time their more noble and solid advantage, which consists in the generous Fruition and gradual Improvement of what they already possess. 'Tis one of the sorest evils under the Sun, the very Canker of wealth, like the Worm in the Gourd, that one already seized of a vast estate (more perhaps than he hath heart to use or Brain to manage) should harass or but disease himself in the acquest of some little accession: more brutish herein than Beasts▪ who being in rich Pa­stures, break no Fences, nor look any further. How happy were it, could such but be acquainted with the goodly privileges and improvements of their Estates by discreet enjoyment; so at least, as not to seek what they have, and dearly buy, or rather sell and betray their own Fortunes! To see a Gentle­man of Estate, out of the Usurer's reach, and with­out colour of Exigence, not rashly, but industriously and with great ostentation of wisdom, for sorry pelf and lucre, expose himself, with all his hopes and ad­vantages, to the venture (indeed certain mischief) of an unworthy Match; what is it but to be sub­orn'd to his own manifest wrong, and hired as it were [Page 9] to destroy himself? such errour being every way surrounded with repentance.

In the first place, 'tis an authentick Observation, That great Portions are commonly attended with great disappointments and frauds; however, that Land is rarely therewith purchased or Estates im­proved, almost as seldom as with Moneys won at play; they serving for the most part rather like Sawces to humour the palate and whet the appetite, than food to nourish; dangerous Fewel, and Decoys of vanity and expence. I grant that such as have little or no other fund oft-times speed better with them; partly by reason of the thrift to which they have been obliged, little being from such expected; chiefly for that great kindness on the Womans side, being the ground-work of such Matches, disposes them to chearful compliance: Much like Offices and Court-employments, which though commodious for Cadets, yet with great Landlords we find scarce turn to account. When the Bills of Wooing, Wed­ding, and Honey-year are desraid, the Baste I doubt proves more than the Roast.

Yet in pursuit thereof, the Fortune▪ catcher dis­claims all those nobler Considerations and Attra­ctives, most of which are singly without compari­son to be preferr'd, but some inestimable, for that by Nature, Precept or Example they are propagated, (viz.) lovely Feature and Shape, graceful Motion, sound Constitution, Gayety of Humour, Quickness of Wit, discreet Behaviour, approved Huswifery, &c. In lieu whereof he oft-times both stifles his Affections and buries his Family, by marrying certain Barrenness or Infirmity, courting imperfections which [Page 10] carry with them an Attainder of Blood. At best, he blindly subjects even his present Fortune to the discretion of a woman taken at random from the Lottery of a licentious Age. For with what Arms shall he defend himself from her Wantonness, Malice, or but Folly? Some indeed oppose the Husband's Authority as a sufficient Target; but alas! our Pri­sons, I doubt may now afford a full Regiment of such Martyrs: so dangerous a Privilege hath it prov'd of late for our fair Ladies to be unconcern'd in Debts of their own contracting, and so make their Husband's Mittimus at their pleasure. Stay, there is yet (if possible) a sharper Sting in the tayl of this Miscarri­age; for to win those unprofitable Trophies, vast Joyntures, and even Liquid Rents are often extorted, Conveyances and Trusts are multiplied to dangerous▪ Expence, but far more dangerous Encumbrance; in­deed the endless perplexing of Claims and Titles, a fruitful S [...]dolet of pernicious Suits and Discords in after▪ times. Troth, if the Husband henceforth write Philip and Mary, 'tis all he can hope for: She reckons his Estate her Purchase, and disputes his Property; not to lie admonish'd without Sullenness, nor con­troll'd without the menace of a final Breach, and intimation of worse, the danger of Elopment being fairly provided for by sutable Alimony of course presum'd: towards which, and for the perfect bind­ing of foolish Jealousie to its good behaviour, on the same worthy Consideration whole Patrimonies are likewise settled; whereby at one dash the sheepish Owner, forfeiting as it were his Inheritance becomes a sorry Pensioner, devested of all Authority, unable to serve his Prince or Friend, or help himself in case [Page 11] of any Exigent unforeseen. His eldest Son he makes his Landlord of an interest wholly forreign and in­dependent, able to borrow more pounds than him­self can fairly shillings; and claiming not by descent, much less by his Father's bounty, but by even his own or his Mothers purchase, or at least the wise provision of his Parents on that side. No marvel then if his Obedience prove answerable, since with­out some preternatural Obligation, 'tis daily seen what becomes of filial Duty and Reverence. His younger Children, like Estrich's Eggs, he exposes to pity, that is, contempt, and the miseries that attend poverty and quality in conjunction; oft-times dis­abling himself so much as to countenance them in a Mechanick Course, with such manifest hardship, that he can never look clearly on them, nor almost chal­lenge their observance. Thus it happens to his Fa­mily, as where Dung lies still unspread; the whole Farm is Barren, and the Maxine noisom. But be­sides all this, to me methinks it is not a little strange, that in the very Bargain such Fallacies should be obtruded on men endued with Number and Sense. First the Portion is computed to yield an Income answerable to the Current Rate of Interest, and measures for Settlement accordingly taken; whereas, though it came clearly to account (as scarce ever it doth) yet with Gentlemen of noble and free Estate, whose stock seldom runs in that Chan­nel, 'tis fair if it turn to half that profit; and then 'tis admitted as a Revenue proportion­ed to the present Maintenance and Port of Wives: when, alas, were it fairly examined, not grosly swallowed like a Dutch Reckoning Al [...]meale, [Page 12] it would but too plainly appear, the Pomp of such Women is rarely defrayed at double the charge: For so great is their overweening, so little their ten­derness or Justice to their Husbands (into whose Fa­milies they are not kindly engraffed) that those who at their Parents allowance were proud enough of keeping their Maid, and gloried in the Managery of a sorry Stipend, do, on their Marriage, even chal­lenge an exorbitant Train and boundless Expence, little caring what becomes of their Husbands, so they hold fast their Joyntures.

On the other side, a generous and prudent match, is further improved with divers Felicities naturally attending it; which I shall endeavour by way of Antithesis to exemplifie in many pregnant In­stances.

To those golden Idols of course belongs a super­stitious worship, with such tedious and frivolous addresses and pursuit for the most part, as, besides the present Excess, lays a foundation for future un­thrift, (a Torrent which is scarce to be suddenly check'd;) so driving men upon all accounts to a scur­vy After-game. For though the Oaths of Suitors are become a By-word (as for their Vanity they de­serve) yet at best they are dangerous impertinencies, scarce consistent with Wisdom or Honour. To vow a Talent with meaning a Drachme, to flatter egre­giously without ground of Truth, how vile and ab­ject is it! And if such as use it meet with the success they merit, by being taken at their words, are they not paid in their own Coyn? For how can they wor­thily assert that Authority which they have so pro­strated? And with what Forehead can they chal­lenge [Page 13] that Duty, where they have sworn such Fealty and done such Homage? He at once cuts off all this Pageantry, who appay'd in his Self-sufficiency with­out other regard, gratifies his inclinations, makes his own Conditions, and is courted to his real advantage: he breaks not his word, in keeping and using his power, nor renders himself Usurper to his own Right; but finds her indeed a Wife whom he never made a Mistress, nor furnish'd with any pre­tence of aspiring to it. How little soever she brings, I dare profess, that at seven years end, on this ac­count, he shall boast of his Bargain.

It hath been noted as the fatal Error of our com­mon Oeconomy to begin at the wrong end, by in­dulging present Excess, and projecting future Thrift: We see goodly Vessels daily split upon that Rock; where at none will marvel that consider how prepo­sterous and almost impracticable it is, from the diffi­culty of playing the After-game of Fortune and re­forming evil (but especially voluptuous) Habits; from the daily growing charge of Children and their E­ducation, as also from the disrepute attending such Retrenchments. Besides, of what consequence in it self considered must it be to save or spend at first? Since a stock timely saved, may by easie im­provement in some years double its Capital; but a Sum early borrowed shall within the same pe­riod quadruple its Debt: whereby the perpetual plenty or penury of Families, with all the ensuing benefits or mischiefs seem chiefly hereon to depend. Hence that homely but useful Proverb, of taking her down in her Wedding-shooes; which to Wives not intoxicated with Fortune is familiar enough: where­as [Page 14] those Courting stocks, from the Cradle cockered, and only wedded to their Wills, are not to be con­vinced but by late Experience, the curst School­mistress of Fools.

No man is so unvers'd in houshold or worldly af­fairs, but must observe how good Families are pre­served, and both interest and repute advanced by the honourable Residence of Landlords upon their Demesnes, by constant absence or frequent motion undermin'd and eclipsed: Insomuch as some stick not to averr, that before the common use of Coaches, few but Traytors or Felons made shipwrack of their Freeholds. Indeed if the Husband should be forth by occasions or on publick Service, yet what hath the Wife to do, but stay at home, and as a trusty Depu­ty act for his interest by his order in his stead? Her House is her proper Sphere, her best Title that of Huswifery; which if she merit not, she is so far from being a help meet for him, as she is certainly his great encumbrance. But is this the practice of our Female-sparks? are these the Maxims of such as by the false measures, and with the natural arrogance of rich Wives, ever fancy they have over-bought their Husbands and under-sold themselves? Do they espouse their Husbands welfare, or but consider it in competition with their own ease, appetite or hu­mour? What noise is heard but the loud Eccho's of their Fortune, with challenge of Equipage and Ex­pence in their Judgment sutable, that is, vastly ex­ceeding it, and such as few Estates can support? Is not Home their banishment, and London indeed their home? If their Lot be not to live in that or some o­ther good Town or place of like charge and diver­tisement, [Page 15] what exceptions are taken! what objecti­ons and delays contrived! The Air is either too moist or too cold, too thick or too thin; the ways thereabouts to be sure are either dirty or stony; the House too solitary or too near a Street, not of mo­dern Fabrick, or modish Furniture: The Gentry of those parts not Courtly; not a man it should seem within ken qualified for a Gallant; the Commonal­ty rude, &c. Possibly they are at length hal'd to their homes as to Prisons, but hir'd, forsooth, with the Donative of a Child's portion or two, to pur­chase Toys for the Wife, and therewith quiet for the Husband. Being placed at the Helm of a good Fa­mily, like a Monkey at the Steerage of a ship, their first care is to solicit acquaintance, and their main business consists in the Ceremony of receiving and returning visits; their Entertainments finding work for three or four Servants, their very Salutations and Appointments too for almost as many: so that here to act the part of good Husbands in the Vulgar no­tion both to Wives and Estates, to gratifie the one and preserve the other is perhaps next door to impos­sible.

The good Nature of Children singly considered is of greater moment and advantage than wealth, the improvements of it being far more excellent, and the miscarriages less reparable. For what recom­pense of Fortune to a Creeple, a diseased Body, an uncomely person, above all, a crooked Mind? and what Portion equal to those personal Endowments, the propriety whereof neither Fortune nor malice can invade? To this eminent Duty the true Huswife dedicates her time and pains: her Children are her [Page 16] Garden, her Park, nay her Court. In their tender years her business is to protect them from disasters and injuries, to secure their health and growth, to ob­serve their Genius, to instruct them in their best Ca­pacities, yet rather leading than driving them, and supplying their defects with her skill and diligence; in all which her thrift is sutable to her tenderness. Her Sons she early resigns to their Father's Discipline, never interrupting it with pernicious fondness: In their riper years, she insensibly trains them to lau­dable Qualities▪ (yet for use not ostentation) her Lectures and Charms chiefly tending to the banish­ment of pride and sloth. Having thus seasoned them with Principles of Thrift and Content, she scrapes not for portions, nor is solicitous of their preferment, which she trusts may succeed to her wish, as com­monly it doth; however she acquits and satisfies her self with this reasonable confidence, that if they prove not fortunate, they can scarce be miserable; which yet to our delicate and shiftless Dames fre­quently happens. But will our She-gallant now adays admit any such vulgar duty as the tendance of her Children; surely, that she leaves for Mecha­nicks, assigning the drudgery thereof to Hirelings, who accordingly perform it to treble Charge and Expence▪ as needless, as fruitless: she hears not their complaints or wants, much less sees them, but in their sad effects, incurable lameness or sickness, to the sud­den expiring even of fruitful Families; no, the im­portance of her Dresses or Treatments affords not leisure for such trifles; or if to supererogate she mind them by fits, yet through her partiality or uneven Temper, such regard proves worse than neglect. On [Page 17] her Sons (especially the eldest) of course she dotes▪ underhand fomenting their stubbornness to the over­throw of whatsoever their Father with his Wisdom builds. In fine, her chief care is to cultivate their pride, the rankest Weed of our Nature, by good pa­rents so industriously subdued: To her own Idea she frames them, for indeed better Principles or Manners than she hath how should she infuse? so that people in the Streets scarce forbear to proclame them Chips of the old Block; and at last in despite of their Fa­ther's provision, 'tis great odds, they marry either to his disparagement or their Husbands undoing.

The exact survey of their own Estates is a skill and employment more worthy of prudent Land­lords, than some other their Entertainments, plau­sible indeed but not practicable; were it more in re­quest, good Families would not so fast decline. It would impartially discover to them their strength or weakness, and acquaint them what indeed they have to spend; which I dare pronounce is seldom half so much as Fame and Opinion suggest unto them: For computing Revenues now adays with their manifold losses and Reprises, they prove in effect like some fruits, little more than Shells and Parage; which how generally soever discours'd, is seldom rightly stated, save by such as have smarted for their Expe­rience of it. But how harsh a note is this to our Damsels, enured to reckon by thousands! Can they disgorge what they have so well digested, or patient­ly hear, that in the estimate of their Husband's In­come, there happen'd, forsooth, an unlucky mistake of Pounds instead of Nobles? Alas! that might en­danger the gilding of their next Coach, the reduce­ment [Page 18] of their Equipage, their forbearance of London, &c. No, there's a trick worth two of that, even to set the best foot forward; not to brook such unsa­voury Truths, but rather to their own and their Hus­band's Credit, to admit the popular Cry, and with it conspire to his Bane.

Of like necessary use is it to be vers'd in the Rates and Measures of houshold Expence, which in well­govern'd Families should be almost as regular as the victualling of Fleets; to have the faculty of hand­som, but withal provident House-keeping and En­tertainment; of procuring Equipage and Furniture of all sorts at the best hand, likewise of adjusting, preserving and repairing it: for want whereof our English Ladies are said to have contracted such ob­loquy in Holland, where by reason of the constant dearness of Provisions, and endless Payments, no man of what Estate soever without great frugality can thrive or well subsist, that a Dutch man scarce marries one of them without the loss of his Trading­credit. Some of these Qualities the right-bred Hus­wife sucked in with her Mothers milk, others she learned with her A B C, and for the rest proves no Truant, her Genius being active, and fixed on the Idea of Huswifery as its proper object; wherein her de­fects, if any, are of course supplied by her Husbands Experience, whose Advice, whether directory or monitory, finds her ear always open to it. But what hope of enammelling a mere Flint? what thought of instructing persons too dull to apprehend of themselves, too froward to learn? Offer our Fe­male Libertines any Counsel that trenches on their Vanity, or pinches their Sloth, 'tis at best durus ser­mo, [Page 19] and accordingly with them it speeds; reckon­ing or contrivance, it should seem, are as much be­low their breeding as Thrift: Rather they have con­ferr'd notes with the good Fellows, whose generous Maxime, they say, is to drink as long as the Cup will ramn; the utmost extent of their Husband's credit (if they can carry it by hook or by crook) being the only limit of their Expence: otherwise Estates could not be so commonly blown up without noise, and as it were with white Powder, nor mouldred a­way by good, that is, demure and well-meaning Wives, faster, methinks, than even bad Husbands dis­patch them.

Of Wives advisedly taken from a frugal Stock, the same proof may resonably be expected as of Trees chosen out of a Nursery, the Glebe wereof is sound but barren, and remov'd into a richer Soil; or like a Rhenish Grape transplanted into a Southern Cli­mate, the Race whereof is said to be our right Ca­nary. Such are commonly unacquainted with deli­cacy or sloth, and early seasoned with this Prin­ciple, That their esteem for Virtue and Huswifery is their best Portion: so as the improvement of their Condition by Marriage to their Native Qualities, must needs add that of Content and Complacence, than which nothing is in Wives more amiable. The Restraint of others proves their Manumission, and they are apt to err on the safer hand; Retirement: or if their sprightly Genius with their Youth should incline them to the Gayety of Towns and Treat­ments, yet not being naturalized thereto by Cu­stom, they are by the sense of their Duty or perso­nal Engagement without violence reclaimed. Nor [Page 20] is this happy Temper only considerable in it self, but in the soveraign influence it hath on their Husbands, thereby often wean'd from their Extravagancies: whereas there is no Purgatory to the unquiet Con­versation of some Wives, when their boundless ap­petites or lofty expectations are not gratified. The turbulency of such, if Solomon may be credited, turns a Palace into a Cottage, or, if we will trust Experience, into Bridewel or Bedlam. Nay though it be but the common Chagrin, and little moods of our peevish and affected Dames, the endless imperti­nence of them too often so disturbs men of better Principles and Humour, that finding themselves un­easie sojourners in their Houses, under pretence of Civil Inclination, have courted their divertisement in the freedom of Lodgings at London, or welcome of Inns and Taverns which their Purses command. But then whilst the Lawless freedom of these Planets by inviting Courtship, if it betray them not, yet sel­dom fails of exposing even the best of them to their Husband's just resentment, nay to Lampoons and Vulgar Censures, with indelible stains of Honour; the wise and decent Reservedness of these fixed Orbs, as it worthily endears them to their Husbands, so it preserves no less their Fame than their Virtue, and perfumes their Memory.

And as there is nothing more fulsom than the pride of these goodly Cyphers at the Spring-tide of prosperity, so in any ebb of Fortune, by their droop­ing and whining they at best discover their dross. Take from these Birds of Juno their Train, and is there ought so vulgar, indeed so despicable? But though their Spirits sink, 'tis great odds their Spleens [Page 21] rise; and then whether the decay proceed from pub­lick Calamity, private misfortune, or, as too oft it happens, through their own fault, Reason and Pa­tience give place to Fury and Clamour: the porti­ons they brought are aloud objected, and their Husbands (though indeed the chief, if not the only sufferers) arraign'd for betraying their innocent wives to the distress of missing their Coaches and Liveries: the noise and anguish whereof is to ingenuous Na­tures so sensible, that it drives them as it were in their own defence to purchase their present quiet with ruinous compliance and concealment of their Exigencies; it being observ'd that our Domestick breaches (now so familiar) have generally their rise from the first visible decay of Husbands in their Estates, and their necessary abridging the superflui­ty of such Wives: for they are mere Summer-friends, and a sort of Legal Concubines; their love depends on their fare, and no Penny, no Pater noster, is their Principle. What a Cordial is this to men in afflicti­on! such a female Comfort for all the world had Job. Much happier is the Omen of generous Matches, Desert being the womans Dowry: To such the vi­cissitudes of Fortune are no surprisals. The Virtue of their Education qualifies even their prosperity, and for the most part secures it: but if the same wings of wealth which brought it to them, should carry it from their Husbands, they retreat in order, and ea­sily renew their old acquintance with Thrift; nay, with less reluctancy can they go, if need be, to A­merica, than most Wives are drawn from London into some neighbouring County; as owning their Husbands welfare for their only interest, and that [Page 22] for their Country whither his occasions call them; whose very Eclipse by such chearful aid and compli­ance proves to him a state rather of Temperance and Retirement than want.

But lastly and chiefly, great Portions (as before was hinted) are dearly purchased with answerable Joyntures to the exceeding detriment of good Fa­milies, by keeping the Heirs almost in perpetual Nonage: whereas by dispensing in point of Fortune, all such pretences vanish, and moderate provisions (consistent with the well-being thereof) are chear­fully embraced; which being accordingly made in in Bar of Dower, and (for the greater share) limit­ed to continue only during Widowhood, are like­wise the best, perhaps only sufficient Fences against those fatal Trespasses and Disseisins, which com­monly ensue from the rashness of young wantons in the choice of their second Beds: the Fortune-catch­er through his silly purchase and groundless confi­dence, proving in the mean time little better than a Pimp to his ignoble successor, and a Butcher to his posterity, expos'd almost as a certain prey to the Intruder. For daily experience acquaints us, that as Widows (so continuing, and honourably retaining the name and memory of their first Affections) are of all others the most faithful and happy Guardians and Executors; so there is no hostility to the unna­turalness of Mothers, when forsaking as it were their Colours, and betaking themselves to the ad­verse party, they become a kind of Stepdames to their own Brood.

I foresee you will meet with several Objections, commonly urged in excuse of that ignoble Principle [Page 23] and practice, viz. the dispensing with any thing in Marriage rather than Money, and compassing the Golden Wedge on any terms, which with one of your Judgment must even carry little weight: how­ever I shall briefly examine the most material of them.

'Tis alledged 1. That these Maxims and Asserti­ons, at least divers of them, are obnoxious to the fair Ladies frowns. 2. If the maintenance of Wives be so costly as is here surmised, and if there be such failour or contingency in the Revenue of Land, the greater still the obligation of marrying for Money. 3. By dispensing with Portion sutable to the Estate, men incurr the popular Censure of being overreach'd in their bargain, and so forfeit the esteem for dis­cretion. 4. Joyntures answerable to the Quality of Husbands, and our Legal rate of Dower seem decent if not necessary. 5. Settlement of Estates upon Marriage hath been ever reputed and found the best preservative of them from being squandred by the profuseness, or forfeited by the precipitancy of Youth. 6. Straitness of Fortune is generally at­tended with meanness of Education. 7. There are no such Qualities in women as can recompense want of Portion, nor any such defects as to counterpoise a vast Dowry, and therefore those surmises vain. 8. Such is the Lottery of Marriage through the dis­guises of women, that the whole Advice seems fan­tastical; true worth having no outward Mark. 9. 'Tis confin'd to Gentlemen of great and clear Estates who are few, and therefore at best of little use. 10. Even of such the greatet part marry at an age scarce ca­pable of those Counsels, being sway'd by their amo­rous [Page 24] inclinations; and whatever caution is used in the Bargain, yet by the insinuation of crafty Wives 'twill be afterwards easily defeated. 11. To re­dress even abuses of such prescription is a frivolous Enterprise, neither will men be so dazeled with meer flourishes, as not to see and pursue their solid In­terests.

To the first 'tis readily answered, That all fair and deserving Ladies will, I doubt not, take me for their Advocate; and if they smile, the frowns of others shall the less concern me: under that Imperial Banner I assure my self both of safety and victory.

To the second I cannot better reply, than by re­ferring to the several Antitheses betwixt Huswives and Gallants; which, together with the notorious fallacy and encumbrance of great Portions stop the mouth of this Objection. To say the truth, 'tis with women as with Fire and Water; nothing so destru­ctive where they prevail or exceed, nothing so in­nocent and useful in their proper limits.

To the third; Men should act with Reason, not regarding popular Censure, their real welfare being of greater consequence to them, than the verdict of that incompetent Jury. As to their being over­reach'd, may not the retaining the Dominion of their Estates abundantly salve their Credit? Surely they will be so far from fearing the Censure of wise men, as rather to win their applause, and perhaps invite their imitation.

The fourth might better have been urged for­merly, when Widows were indeed such. But if in moderate and limited Joyntures there be Errour, 'tis at least a safe one, reparable at pleasure, in case of [Page 25] special confidence or desert; the other mischief in case of demerit, being irretrievable: nay, the very reservation of Power in the Husband to oblige or re­sent is perhaps the life of his Authority.

To the fifth, Though no humane Providence be entire and complete; yet the absolute dependence of eldest Sons on their Father's bounty is the likeli­est means to secure their Duty, and curb their Per­versness and Extravagance: however let them at least own their ruine to their own, not their Father's folly; and if perish they must, die rather like men than beasts, ordained to be innocently sacrificed.

The sixth reflects untowardly on our Gentry, who though disabled to raise Mountains for their Daugh­ters, yet oft-times recompence that want with gene­rous and usefull Breeding, such as Money perhaps can­not compass, and will therefore disdain that Vulgar scandal.

The seventh bids defiance to common Experience, which affords frequent Examples of Wives, by whose Huswifery, without advantage of Dowry, weak and encumbred Estates, even in adverse times, have been notably rescued and improved: but of e­minent Landlords by hundreds, without any visible improvidence of their own, strangely undone through the Vanity of women. Nay, there is scarce any numerous Brood, which presents not this variety e­ven among Sisters; some whereof were born for the support of Husbands, others for their downfal: so considerable is that Sex to the Lustre or Eclipse of Families. Indeed were Wives but so just or good­natur'd as to continue their Maiden-thrift in their married State, Husbands would grow but too rich.

The eighth reduces the matter to blind Chance, disabling not only Reason but Sense. Much I allow to the Artifice of Women in appearing to advantage, and with such outsides forbid Minds are affected, like greedy Vermine caught with slight Baits; there would not otherwise be such Devotions paid to such sorry Saints: But men of noble Intention are not so enchanted; Real worth being to such as dis­cernible from Affectation, as fine Silver from Alchy­my▪ or true Beauty from Dawbing.

For the ninth, I admit Gentlemen of entire Estates to be herein concern'd, but not exclusively to per­sons of all degrees having any solid Fund of Re­venue; these Maxims being proportionably Uni­versal.

The tenth is grounded on the presumption of in­excusable Fondness in most that marry. Truly I have not of late observ'd that amorous humour to be very predominant in our Matches; the other and worse Extreme of preferring a Licentious Celibate, or marrying with a vicious intent, being, methinks, in far more request. Some there will ever be, in whom Fortune and Folly conspire to their ruine: These I abandon as Strays and Forfeits to the Lord of the Mannour where they first light; but they are com­paratively fools. The danger of defeating Conditi­onal Settlements seems yet more remote, there being little fear of such dotage in those Husbands who had once the Prudence to make them; and less encou­ragement, one would think, for Wives, by such plain dealing, to proclaim their design of Second Marriage.

The last were indeed a just Exception, if herein I [Page 27] pretended to more than the advising my Friend: The subject I confess is copious enough; one might without straining argue the importance of it to the publick, what price, and consequently what life it would give to the languishing Virtues of Women; what a Curb it would prove, not only to that Sexes Vanity, but to Luxury in general, it being notorious that in effect all our ruinous Pomp may be charged on womens account, as being either by them, or for them incurred. What a sumptuary Law it would prove, if the extravagance of Wooings and Wed­dings were reduced to their simple Decorum; How it would restore the Lustre of our Gentry; how it would check the pride of our Money-monger, chief­ly founded in their greedy swallowing of his treache­rous Baits; How it would advance the noble inter­est of Land, by rescuing it from the snare of cheap and prostitute Encumbrances, &c. But you see I trouble not the Policks, leaving our Wits to dispute, whether the general disallowing or limiting of Mar­riage▪ portions were profitable or practicable: Let others use their discretion, and take their fortune, you, I dare say, are neither Votary nor slave to Custom.

To conclude this tedious Epistle, Marry in God's name; your Ancestors deserve and require it of you, who both by their Virtue rais'd a Family worthy to be continued, and by their providence left you an Estate sufficient to continue, nay, to enlarge it. Let no licentious Principle of the Age divert, nor Vul­gar Prejudice deter you from a state of Life for you so expedient; and which for Gentlemen of your condition, (what ever may be surmised) hath no Fet­ters [Page 28] but of their own forging: Marry, I say, but generously and circumspectly, even the most worthy or lovely person you can meet with or hear of. 'Tis a debt due to your Posterity that you propagate the best you can; nay you owe it most of all to your self and your own wel­fare: if somewhat must be dispensed with (as in all worldly matters there certainly must) let it be money, since that to my knowledge you least want: but for the propriety of your Estate, let nothing wrest it from you, and scorn that all the Bags in London should decoy you to settle it: reckon it to you as sacred and essential, as to Princes their Militia or Negative Vote; and part no more with it, than, were you a Soveraign, you would be bought or ca­jol'd tamely to resign your Sceptre. For matter of Joynture use your own Latitude; but limit the main of it to Widowhood, or the Heir's Minority, as you see cause. Be not so supine as to make no provision against Power; above all beware of Li­quid Rents: Be Captain of your own Pinnace what­ever it cost you; what you lose in the Hundred, you will abundantly recover in the County; and though you finger not a Token, know 'tis the best bargain you will ever drive. For your general and final di­rection take that of the Roman Poet, ‘—Veniunt à Dote Sagittae:’ With this of the famous Epigrammatist,

And thus heartily wishing prosperity to your noble Resolutions, I always continue,