AGAINST MARRIAGE: Directed to that Inconsiderable Animal, called HUSBAND.
HVsband! thou Dull unpittied Miscreant,
Wedded to Noise, to Misery, and Want;
Sold an Eternal Vassal for thy Life,
Oblig'd to Cherish, and to Heat a Wife:
Drudge on till Fifty; at thy Own Expence
[...]reath out thy Life in one Impertinence;
Repeat thy loath'd Embraces every Night
Prompted to Act, by Duty (not Delight:)
Christen thy froward Bantling every Year,
And carefully thy Spurious Issue Rear:
Go once a Week to see the Brat at Nurse,
And let the Young Impostor drein thy Purse:
Hedg-Sparrow-like, what Cuckoo's have begot
Do thou maintain, Incorrigible Sott.
Oh! I could curse the Pimp that could do less,
He's beneath Pitty, and beyond Redress:
Pox on him! let him go: what can I say?
Anathema's on him are Thrown away;
The wretch is marry'd, & has known the worst,
And now his Blessing is, he can't be Curst.
Marry'd! O Hell and Furies! Name it not,
Hence, hence you Holy Cheats; a Plot, a Plot.
Marriage is but a Licens'd way to Sin,
A Nooze to catch Religious Wood-cocks in:
Or the Nick-name of some Malicious Friend,
Begot in Hell to Prosecute Mankind.
'Tis the Destroyer of Our Peace and Health,
Mispender of our precious Time and Wealth;
The Enemy to Wit, Valour, Mirth, all
That we can Virtuous, Good, or Pleasant call.
By Day 'tis nothing but an endless Noise;
By Night the Eccho of Forgotten Joys:
[...]road the Sport and Wonder of the Crowd,
[...] Home the hourly breach of what we vow'd:
In it's Opium to our Lustful Rage,
Which sleeps a while, and wakes again in Age.
It heaps on all Men much (but useless) Care,
Forthwith more Trouble, they less Happy are;
It checks Youth, shortens life, & taints the mind,
[...]ur Sences pauls, and strikes our Reason blind.
Ye Gods! that Man by his own Slavish Law,
[...]ould on himself such Inconvenience draw:
If we would Wiser Natures Laws Obey.
Those chalk him out a far more pleasant way,
She bids freely Look, Like, and Enjoy.
Therefore when lusty Youth & Wine conspire
To Flame the Blood unto a Generous Fire;
We must not think the Gallant will Indure
The Durient Raging of his Calenture:
Nor always in his single Pleasures Burn,
Tho' Natures Hand-maid sometime serves the turn:
No, he must have a sprightly youthful Wench,
In equal floods of Love, his flame to quench;
One that will hold him in her Clasping Arm,
And in that Circle all his Spirits Charm;
That with New Motion, and unpractis'd Art,
Can raise his Soul, & then insnare his Heart▪
Hence springs the Noble, Fortunate, and Great,
Always Begot in Passion, and in Heat:
But the Dull Off-spring of the Marriage-Bed,
What is it? but a Humane shape in Lead:
A Sloathful Lump Ingender'd of all Ills,
Begot like D— against the Parents Wills.
If it be Cukoldiz'd, it's Doubly Spoil'd,
The Mothers Fear's Intail'd upon the Child.
Thus whether Illegitimate▪ or Not,
Cowards and Fools in Wedlock are Begot:
Let no Enobled Soul himself Debase,
By Lawful Ways to Dasterdize his Race;
But if he must Pay Natures Debt in Kind,
To check the growing Danger, let him find
Some willing Female out; What tho' she be
The very Scum and Dregs of Infamy:
Tho' she be Linsey-Woolsey, Baud & Whore,
Close-stool to Venus, Natures Common-shore,
Impudence, Folly, Brandy, and Disease,
The Sundays Crack for Suburb-Prentices;
What then? she's better then a Wife by half,
And if thou'rt still Unmarry'd, thou art safe.
with whores thou can'st but venture,what is lost
May be Redeem'd again with Care and Cost;
But a Damn'd Wife, Inevitable Fate,
Destroys, Soul, Body, Credit, and Estate.
FINIS.