A New merry Newes, As merry as can bee, From Italy, Barbary, Turkie, and Candee.


LONDON, Printed by Hugh Iackeson. 1606.

New merry newes, As merry as can bee, From Italy, Barbary, Turkie, and Candee.

AS many of wonders reioyce for to heare,
And many good fellows do ioy in good cheare
So Poets for pleasure haue pretily fained,
That gods in old time a great many raigned:
As Ioue for the highest and chéefest in seate,
And Mars for his courage and maiesty great:
Apollo for wisedome, and Pluto for hell,
And a god for each matter maruelous well.
And so of like goddesses many strange fables,
As Painters with properties, set out strange ta­bles:
Where minds be adicted to honor & praise,
Some this way, some that waies, some contrary wais:
It pleased the Pagans this curtesie to vse,
To worship god Bacchus and this is the newes:
Because that in Ethiop nighest the sunne,
Bacchus bestoweth the wine by the tunne:
Whereto all Christendome séekes to repaire,
The grapes be so goodly, the vines be so faire:
And glad is the Marchant can vtter his ware,
To buy the good malmzey and muskadell there:
The sacke, the hollocke, the iuberall tare,
The romny, Robdauy, and wine of Canare.
[Page] The gods perceyuing this clustring thither,
They fell a shriuing there heads togither.
Perceiuing chiefly by many mens faces,
They got commdoities great in those places.
And they that came thither as pale as a clout,
Come liuelier hither, then they went out,
They agreéd to haue a Parliament day,
To set the decrees at an excellent stay.
Wherevpon the vintners that had the first view,
Stept to the gods and began to sue,
That blessed saint Martin Lieutenant might be,
Of the Vine presses in euery degrée,
That they being vintners, and liue by the wines,
might haue the preheminence first for their coyns.
And they that would hold or claime any right,
Vnder saint Martins Banner should fight.
This sute was granted, the gods did agrée,
And home came the vintners so franke and so frée.
Such potsale and hotsale, was made in all places,
That vpstart the Ale in noses and faces.
This being long vsed, set men at such ods,
That other new Marchants did sue to the gods,
As Iewellers, Brotherers, and such occupations,
Which said that the vintners vsurped their fashiōs.
And there was hard hold, and chiefly at Candie,
For there they inrold the matter in Malmzey.
Then was there commission sent into Spaine,
To know what condition so troubled the braine.
[Page] Some said it was Hollock, some said it was Sack,
But at last Robdauy was caught by the backe.
After this done there fell such a chance,
Some laid the occasion commenced in France.
The gods sent to Gascoin, commission with spéed,
And they sent to Burdeaux the letters to reed.
And there it was found the white wine of Aniou,
To Bachides bellies would neuer be true.
Then went they to Orleance, and so to the Kaine,
There was the whole troth returned againe.
The gods then perceiuing so many great suters,
Ann in euery countrey so many promoters.
And such a brabling kept in all places,
About the colouring of noses and faces,
They told the Vintners as they did all the rest,
We assure you sirs, we thinke you were best,
And most expedient for you citizens all,
to be vnder the gouernment of coppersmiths hall,
Wherevpon the Vintners made supplication,
As here ye may reade the maner and fashion.

The Vintners Supplication.

IN most humble wise beséech and show,
Vnto your Godheads all in a row,
The Vintners remaining in all kinds of places,
That where by maintaining of noses and faces:
There hath béene great sale and vtterance of wine
Besides Béere and Ale, and Ipocrasse fine.
[Page] In euery countrey, Region, and nation,
But chiefly in London at the Salutation.
And at the Bores head, hard by London stone,
And the swan at Dowgat a tauerne well knowne
The Myter in Cheape, and then the Bull head,
And many like places to make Noses red,
The castal in Fishstréet, thrée Cranes in the Vin­try,
And now of late at S, Martins in the Sentry,
And so in generall in many a good towne,
Where gallants be gaging the cups vp & downe.
Till that of late for lacke of good order,
The colours decay in euery good border.
By such as intrude, and séeme to oppresse,
Forestalling the markets with drinks that be lesse
And many be dealers in vtterance of Wine,
That are but Alestealers and neuer plant Vine.
May it therfore please your godheads of mercy & pitie,
To appoynt some officers in euery citie,
To apprehend, arrest, and attach in all places,
All such as haue any mettall in their faces,
And that euery man arested in such manner,
Shall carry the kan vnder the Vintners banner.
And if any man denay,
thls Commission to obay:
Then while his nose is hot,
ye shall plie with him the pot,
And banish him his ale,
and set his coate to sale,
[Page] Till that he haue profest,
good fellowship with the rest.

The end of this Supplication.

THis Supplication being red,
Bacchus remembring in his head,
The Vintners bare him great good will,
to kéepe him in his honour still,
And yet he did consider then,
The Chalenge made by other men.
How some did claime by Sockage hold,
and some did claime by déede inrold.
And some did claime by Parentage,
and some did claime by mariage.
And some did claime by Comminaltie,
and such a maruellous companie,
Of tytles strange in many cases,
as touching change of many faces.
God Bacchus thought it good forthwith,
To elect and chuse the Coppersmith,
Imperiall Prince of high and low,
Of all the Vines and Grapes that grow.
And yet vnto the Vintners bill,
He gaue and bare a great will,
and made Commission out of hand,
To the Coppersmiths in euery land,
that they should be the Vintners ayd:
And therewithall God Bacchus sayd.
We will decrée that we thinke méete,
[Page] And that shall be in all things fit:
And therewithall did counsell take,
Good orders in this case to make,
Which orders héere all men may sée,
That subiect vnder Bacchus bée.

Heere followeth the Commission sent to the Copper-smiths.

BAcchides the goddesse of wines,
With the consents of their concubines,
Incensing firie faces,
Sends greeting forthwith,
To Towlie the Copper-smith:
From their almighty Graces,
That where there doth remaine,
In England, France, and Spaine,
Italy, Barbary, Turky, and Candy,
As goodly red noses and faces as can be.
With pimple and pumple to furnish the place,
To set forth the glory of the nose and the face,
With colours most liuely and lusty of hew,
As crimsen in graine, purple and blew.
Be it therefore enacted and made,
That such as doe vse the Vintners trade,
And shall héereafter sée any one passe,
Hard by his doore with copper or brasse,
In any part of his nose or his face,
[Page] He shall fill a quart, and hie him apace,
Strait for to gréete him,
As soone as they méete him,
With a cup of good wine,
To kéepe his colour fine,
Vpon paine for to lose,
The custome of a copper nose.
This also inacted by the toritie aforesaid,
That good inquiry and héede shall be made,
By all manner of person or persons,
that for our honour doe occupie wine tunnes,
that they search among their guesse,
that sit at euery messe,
that they that haue the richest faces,
May be set in the highest places,
And haue contribution,
By the Coppersmiths Commission.
For we perceiue and sée,
For déedes of charitie,
Red noses be a very great reléefe:
For to giue, they néede not to care,
they haue enough to spare,
Without any gréefe.
And if néede requier,
Such a nose may serue a Dier,
to die a liuely hew,
A crimsen in graine,
that will neuer staine,
[Page] A purple or a blew.
These gifts and many mo,
The very truth is so,
Are giuen to goodly faces,
Besides a merry heart,
And a truth that will not start,
From friends in friendly places.

The Armes.

BE it also enacted by the toritie aforenamed,
That there shall be an Armes framed,
That shall be warranted by this our Commissi­on,
And let Heralds deuise that haue erudition:
Thrée copper funnells standing on a tunne,
Thrée vine branches riping in the sunne,
Thrée tall fellowes filling copper kettles,
And Towles the Coppersmith trying out of met­tles
And on the left side, three brazen faces,
To set out the Armes according as the grace is:
Blazed in a gréene field among goodly vines,
Because red noses are nourished with wines:
Also it is enacted and made,
By the toritie aforesaid,
That the Coppersmiths of euery Nation,
May take prentizes to this occupation,
To carry wine-pots for yeares two or thrée,
And as they waxe able, to make them all frée.
Prouided alwaies that none come in cleare,
But shew a red nose once in a yeare.
[Page] Prouided further, if any doe chance,
To claime the fréedome of the Old Hance:
His nose must be as ragged as a rocke,
Full of blew veines, of an antient stocke,
And euery such one must pay at his entry,
A quart of red wine, at St. Martins in the Cen­try.
and at their admittance to continue their troth,
A brother of the company must giue them their oath,
Holding their fingers fast on the pot,
Taking good héede they forget it not:
Or at least waies lay hold on the cup,
and when they haue doue, drinke the drinke vp:
And what euery such shal be charged to sweare,
The gods haue decréed the oath ready to heare.

Heere followeth the Oath.

YE shal sweare to be true to the kan & the cup,
and if it be a full pot ye shall drinke it vp:
And if you do chance to drinke with your brother,
that hath a red nose, and you haue another,
Part, and part like you must equally pay:
And if any one step in by the way,
that hath any mettle flush in his face,
Make him to settle, and say you a grace.
And in any wise looke to your daily drinke,
That your own colours be not suffered to shrink.
[Page] And sée ye performe M. Towles Commission,
And shew your selues ready in euery condition.
Ye shall to these things substancially looke,
So help ye god Bacchus, now sweare by the book.

The end of the Oath.

ANd because this company shall not decay,
But to the gods and goddesses pray:
And doing their duty solemnly appeare,
Be it enacted that once in a yeare,
they haue a great dinner with great discretion,
And afore dinner a generall procession,
And afore the procession, looke wel to your losse,
And sée that Nose autem doe carry the crosse,
And Nose Gloriare shall kéepe the whole quier,
And Libra Nose, set Sencers afire:
And Ne Nose shall be the holy water Clarke,
Let Salua Nose light lamps in the darke:
Iustifica Nose, shall say, Deprofundis,
[...]etifica Nose shall pray for Iocundis:
O Beata Nose shall begin to say grace,
While thy nose & my nose set coūtenance in place.
and euery one that mis.
to goe on procession this,
Shall forfet to the place,
all the mettell in his face.
[Page] And this Commission shall be at all times,
A warrant to the coppersmith and his assignes,
Any prouiso, couenant, clause,
Order, matter, or other cause,
To the contrary notwithstanding,
But to be executed with good handling.

Giuen at Candie: Among the good Malmesey.

VNder the shadow and shape of the Vines,
And sealed wc the signet of our copper coines,
In the day of birth of the man in the Moone,
When Bacchus and Venus was set ouer shoone.

Here followeth a song.

GOd be with Alsinadon,
That made the Tankards long agone,
For sure he was a merry man,
And liued many a day:
And Ienkin was his iourney man,
A verie good companion,
For he would drinke with euery man,
And thus was woont to say:
To whom drinke you, Sir knaue to you,
with hey ioly Ienkin, I sée a knaue a drinking
And trole the bole to me.
[Page] [...]nd Ienkin would be married than,
[...]o Good-ales daughter of the Swan,
[...]is Nose was like a Copper pan,
and that very gay:
When Ienkin and his wife was wed,
[...]ey had no light to go to bed,
But as God would Ienkins nose was red,
[...]d led them both the way.
To whom drinke you, &c.
When Ienkin did awake at night,
[...]e saw his Chamber very light,
[...]e told his wife there was a Sp [...]ight,
[...] Made all his chamber shine:
[...]nd I was in a dreame, quoth shée,
[...]e Sprite was in the Buttrie,
But I beléeue the light you sée,
[...]ommeth from your nose and mine.
to whom drinke-you, &c.
[...]he good wife made no more delay,
[...]ut coniured straight the sprite away,
[...]d Ienkin got a goodly boy,
[...] Of Copper-nose his wife:
[...]d hauing money ynough wherewith,
[...]e put him to the Copper-smith,
[...]o bring him vp into the pith,
[...]ho loued him as his life.
To whom drinke you, &c.
[...]he Copper-smith like an honest man,
[Page] Sent Ienkins sonne to Candy than,
To buy some malmsey if he can,
Where Ienkin was wel knowne.
He neuer came in any place,
But men did maruaile at his face,
So rested with the Copper mace,
And set with pearle and stone,
To whom drinke you, &c.
And Ienkin went to sée his sonne,
Woe worth the time that he begunne,
He was drowned in a malmzey tunne,
alacke and well away:
Now Gentlemen with the copper Nole,
I pray you drinke to Ienkins soule,
and gentle Drawer fill the bowle,
And tell vs what to pay.
To whom drinke you, &c.
W. Elderton.

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