IN mine owne name, Amen: I Belseebub chiefe of Hell, Prince of Darckenesse, Father of the Unbeleeuers, and Gouernour of the vniuersall Sinagogue papisticall, being sycke in body and Soule, make this my Testament and last Wyll, in manner and forme following, that is to saye: Fyrst, I bequeath my spitefull soule & body, to my sonne Antichriste, together to be buried in Saint Peters Churche at Roome, vnderneath the highe Aulter and Canape: or in the stony and carnall heartes of my Dearlynges, the Masse mongers and Papistes. Also all my Ceremonies whiche in the Churches bee vsed here within this Region. I giue them to the makers and inuenters thereof, and to their posteritie, to bestow them where they wyll, that is to saye: Fyrst, I giue and bequeath to Pope Phelix, all such superstitious and ydle Holydayes as he inuented: And to Honorius the Iewe and coniurer, I giue the Offeringes, which were giuen to Idols and Images: And I giue Constantine, all the whole Images of my Churches: My Belles to Sabianus: my Popish Hympnes, to Pope Leo: my Mattens and Organs, to Vrbanus and Vitalyanus: my Synging, to Pope Stephanus: my Procession, to Agabitus: to Pope Alexander, my coniured Waters: to Paschalis, my reliques: to Honorius, my Letany: my supersticion of Lent, to Thelesphorus: the vygill Saturdaye, to Pope Innocent: and the Fridaye fysh, to Pope Leo: The Imbre dayes to Pope Calixtus: to Theodorus, the Paschal at Easter: to Gregory the .vii. the Sayntes vygils and Rogation weeke: my Lent seruice, to Auela the fyrste: my shrynes and dedication, to Sergius and Phelix: All Hallowes and all soules day, to Iohan the .xix: and to Pope Boniface the fowrth: My yearely confession▪ to the Councell of Laternense: and all other my Ceremonies, to the inuenters thereof, as precisely as I rehearsed them particulatly by name.

And I giue and bequeathe to the Userers of all Townes and places, twenty millions of Gold, to be deuyded equallie betweene them, as they woulde parte my blessing, and that they leande to no manner of personne any parte thereof, without great lucre and gaines, yea, and without bearing any aduenture at all.

Item, I giue my Chastitie to the Clargie. Also I giue to the best parte of them, eueryche a red bloody Gowne, and euerie other of them, a longe greene Gowne, or a fine blacke Gowne with euerych their typpettes of veluet and sarcenete, down to the grounde, to be knowne from other men, followinge mee to my buriall, if I dye, and none other personnes. Item, I giue to the meane sort of people, a .M. loaues of bread to be giuen to the Dogs, rather then to poore men.

Item, to the Mercers, and Grocers, and other reteylers of wares, euerych of them, a cloathe to hang before their windowes, and eueryche of them a subtyle lyght, to make all their wares shew fyne.

Item, I giue to the Uinteners, all my rotten Wines, to apparell the rest of their Wines.

Item, I giue to euery Tayler, a Banner, wherein shall be conteyned all the parcelles of cloath and Sylkes, &c. as he hath cast them into Hell.

Item, I giue to eueryche of the cheefest men of Lawe, a Moyle, to brynge hym to Hell, and two ryght handes to helpe himselfe withall, to take money of both parties: And to euerie of these Pety bouget men of Lawe and Tearmers, a couple of Geldynges for him and his man, to ryde vp & downe, and a Bouget to put their Suppenas in, to a cracke the poore men with all in the countrey. Item, I giue to all Women, Souereignty, which they most desire, and that they neuer lacke excuse.

Item, I giue to euerie Single Woman, and Unchaste Wyfe in London, a couered baskette, to beare in their handes, and to the finest sort of them, an Aplesquyer to go before euerych of them to couer their follyes.

Item, I giue to all Whoremongers, Fornicatours and adulterers, a craftie witte, to wrest the Scriptures, and to make them serue for fylthie purposes, therby to ercuse and proue them selues faultlesse. Wherein, I wyll all our Sodomiticall Clergye, which for their owne ease, doo abhorre painfull Wedlocke, and replenishe the worlde with incestuous whoredome, to helpe and aide them with vnshamefast rayling against our enimies, the ministers of Gods worde.

Item, I giue vnto him, which vnder the Tytle of Heresies Testament, dyd as a Ualyaunt Champion of ours, most trayterouslie defame, and sclaunder the true doctrine of my great foe and enimie Iesu Christe, a stubburne, styffe, and rebellious hart therewith, stoutlie through my speciall diuelishe grace, to withstande and resyst, asmuch as in him lyeth, to let his Princes proceedinges, and to intoxicate and poyson the symple, least they fall and swarue from mee, and after his deceasse, if he continew faithfully, to the ende in my seruice, a place in Hell, nexte to Sathan my eldest sonne.

And bicause that with the inuincible swoorde of my mortall enemye, which most victoriouslie raigneth nowe, our kingdome being almost subuerted, sauing that yet some of our Marked Monsters do boldly & vnshamefastly agaynst theyr owne conscience and knowledge maintayne and vpholde it, fyghting with tooth and nayle for oure honour and right. I feele my selfe wounded to death, without any hope of recouerie. For all Phisitions, to whome I had giuen leaue to kyll, boldlye without any feare of enditement or hanging, and to mynister poyson to the patientes, in steede of wholsome Phisycke, haue with the crafty and theeuish Surgeons all forsaken mee, I doo heare, in my ragious mynde, giue my ample and l • rge banner and standarde the Masse, vnder the which, all false Christians, haue with me stubburnly, and much more blasphemouslye fought against the price of theyr owne Soule health and redemption, that is to saye: the death and bloode of my moste deadlye enemye Iesu Christe, vnto my good, especiall and trusty friendes, Emserus, Echius, Faber, Constanciensis, and Stephen Gardenerus, with many other, vnto whome, if they wyll persyst styll in my decent and comelie Campe of blasphemie, I haue prepared a place meete for suche Champions and worthy Knightes. Reserued alwaye, that my Sonne the Antichriste, with his shauelynges, and annointed Sodomites shall bee participante thereof: that so with the daylye Offering of a new made GOD, they maye purchase vnto them selues, my Satanicall blessing, and Helly rest.

I doo giue to Vrbanus the fyrst, the Syluer and golden Chalices: and vnto Sixtus the fyrst, all my syne Corporaces: And the holy Deuyllish hallowed vestmentes, or Parlyament roabes, which my S • andard b • arers doo vse to weare in my battayles and warres, I doo bequeathe vnto Stephen the fyrst.

Item, I giue the rablement of my other feyned and domme Ceremonies wherewith my Standerd is patched and made, to the Popish Massemongers, to comfort their • ory hartes withall, lyc • nsing them, wi • h the mysunderstanded Gospell and Epistle, to cloke their blasphemous masse, as I my selfe dyd bring agaynst mine enemie Christ, plaine scriptures, to blynde them with all: these be the domme and blasphemous Ceremonies that I doo meane: the Confiteor, wherein is the puddle of all blasphemie: the Office: the mysused Kyrye eleeson: their blasmemous Collectes: their couetous Offertory, to spoyle the poore Laitie with all, and fyll theyr owne purses: theyr stynkyng Canon, with theyr Suscipe sancta Trinitas, wherewith they robbe my great enimie Christ, of his honour and glory. Item, I wyll them▪ vnder the colour of the Communion, set foorth by theyr godly Prince, boldly and vnshamefastly to keepe, mayntaine and vpholde my blasphemous Masse, which is an iniurie to the right institution of the Lordes Supper.

Item, I giue to all them that kepe whores beside their wyues a baudy house of their owne, and the saying of the retchlesse Woman in Salomon (St • ll • n waters are sweete, and the bread that is priuely eaten, hath a good taste) to defend their baudery.

Item, I giue to all Priestes Lemondes, that wyll not marie, but perseuer in theyr Sodomyticall, and abhominable chastitie, that they shal pysse Holywater al the dayes of their lyfe, euen chattering against the true wyues of the ministers.

Item, I giue to all them that professe the Gospell, and with theyr fylthie lyuing, doo giue occasion to blaspheme the same, a fayre tongue to talke of it, an hippocriticall face, and a Newe Testament, or other Booke in their handes, to hide their fayned holinesse, and hippocrisie withall.

Item, I giue to all Ruffians, a Sworde and a buckler, a shyrt of mayle, and hosen of the same, a payre of chained buskens, a theeuish looke, and a whore.

Item, I giue to all myydle huswyues: a small huswyfe or two to keepe them cōpany with all, & to loue other mens houses better then their owne, and to passe as much for their honestie, as they do for their cobled shoes, and also a loue to go gaye on the holydaye, and to do nothing another of the working day, to keepe them occupied styll.

Item, I bequeath, to all Dycers, otherwyse called wyndeshaken Gentlemen, to euerie one a thousand payre of false Dyce, a copper Chayne or two, twenty copper ryngs plated with Gold, a glosyng tongue, a fayre dyssembled countenaunce, to deceaue plaine men withall, and an acre of land vpon shoters Hyll, worth an hundreth pound a yeare, therwith to maintaine his estate, and his amorous Ladies.

Item, I bequeathe to euery honest Woman, being a furtherer of Loue, the keeping of some great mans house, that in the owners absence, fayre Wyues maye resort thyther, to banquet, and make mery with their Frannians. Item, I bequeath to euerie yong Woman, maydenlyke, when shee shall go to the market, a poore Woman, to bye hir meate, that shee in the meane tyme maye go to a baudie house for hir recreation, or else to a dauncing schoole, to learne fashions. &c. Item, I bequethe to euerie apprentise that is willyng to deceaue his maister, a receauer of his maisters goodes, a house to set his chest in with his apparell, that he maye go cleanly: a Ruffian for his companion to helpe him to spende his money, & to bring him acquainted with with whores. &c.

Item, I bequeath to all couettous executors, a false and an vnfaithfull harte, and loth to depart from that whiche is not theyr owne, not bestowing the goodes of the poore flocke of Iesu Christ, whiche causeth vs much to reioyce together in hell, to see the multitude that commeth thyther daylye for that dreadfull offence commytting.

Item, I giue to all hatefull haters of the poore Christians, a prowde, crafty, and vnmercifull wytte, against the prouision • or the r • liefe and mayntenaunce of the same.

Item, I giue to certayne Cities, Townes, and Countreyes, neglygent Rulers, deuyllish, vnchaste, couetous, and insatiable mynisters, poll • rs, and guydes to haue the gouernaunce therof: Keeping the goodes bequeathed to the maintenaunce of the same, to their owne lucre and vantage, and to make marchandize of the same, to oppresse the poore laboringe flocke of my enimie Iesu Christ, that they enioye not those goodes, landes and rentes, according to the wyll and minde of the bequ • athers, but maintayne vserie, and make Leases of the rents thereof, to to the vtter vndoing of all Artifyeers, for the which vsurpers is prouided a place with mee in our internall Citties and Palaces, where they shal raigne with Diues Epulo, world without ende.

Item, I geue to the faythfull seruauntes of my Sonne Mammonna, a prowde, couetous, and an vncharitable hart, therewith boldly and without mercy to oppresse the poore, to spoyle the fatherlesse and wyddowes, and to put the commons of the countrey from their farmes, Houses, commodities and lyuinges: and all to mayntaine their Pryde, and enryche them, which after theyr decease wyll spende all those euyll gotten goodes merylie, with carding, dycing, and whorehunting.

Item, I giue to all Craftes men that fyght vnder my Standarde, a lying tongue and swearing. Item, I giue to the Butchers, newe fresh blood to ouersprinkle their stale meate, that it may seeme to the eye of the vnware byer, newly kylled, & pricks inough to set vp their thin meate that it maye appeare thicke and well fedde.

Item, I giue to the Fyshmongers, free lyberty, to sell their rotten Lings, and stinking Saltfish to breede and engender diseases among the people, to the Phisitions aduantage and profit.

Item, I giue to the Cookes and Pye bakers, good leaue to shreade mouldy meat, and ready runne away for quick ware, and to mengle it together with newe fresh flesh, therewith to make pyes and pastyes, to furnish their neighbours Tables withall.

Item, I giue to the Goldsmithes, brasse and copper inough to myngle with their Rynges and plate, to make them to weye for aduantage. Item, I giue to the Peuterers, and all other that occupy weyghtes and measures, to haue false & contrary weyghtes, to bye with one, and sell by another. Item, to the Apothicaries I giue leaue, that when a man asketh them a thing, and haue it not, to bring them another thing and say it is that.

Item, I giue to my Darelings, the priuie Papists, ymages, Crucifyxes, and other lyke puppette maumettry, to worship secretly in their Oratories & Bed Chambers, bicause they maye not worshippe them openlye abroade in Temples and Churches.

¶Ouer this my Testament and last Wyll, which I haue here made, in my ragious minde and spightfull deuyllish memorye, in the presence of my great coūsaylours, Minos, and Radamanthus: I doo make the Furies of H • ll Executors, that is to saye: Megero, Alecto & Tisiphone: all Massemongers and Papistes, with the Author of Heresies Wyll and Testament, being faythful Ouerseers of the same.

Written to our faithfull Secretaries, Hobgoblin, Rawheade, and Bloody bone: in the spightfull Audience of all the Court of Hel. TESTE MEIPSO.