WIthin the large Circumfe­rence of this great Theater, and Stage of the World, all people, Kingdomes, and Nations, Males or Females, of all ages and degrees, are Actors of such parts as they have studied, either from the Rules and Inspirations of Vertue, or from their owne inclinations, and Sa­thans suggestions to Vice. And the Devill w [...]ll knowing our fraile and weake conditions and instability, doth [Page 2] every day and houre (like a cunning Iugler or a Gipsy) devise new Tumb­ling casts and feats of Activity [...] allure and delight the minds of as many as he findes to be addicted to take pleasure in his Le [...]gerdemaine. Hee gives a false sweete-seeming rellish to the Drun­kards Cup, he [...]ars the Glut [...]on against the day of slaughte [...], he tips the Blas­pheamers tongue with Oaths and Cur­ses, he whers the Slanderers and back­biters speech, and makes it keene and cutting; hee teaches the rare and anci­ent Ar [...] of Lying, (and hath [...] innu­merable [...]umber of apt [...] Scholl [...]s) hee turnes ang [...] ­venge, Revenge into Murd [...] to Impie [...]y, Truth into Theft [...] Love into Jealousie, Jealousie into hatred and madnesse; and (in a word) to summe up all together, the Devill doth labou [...] dayly, and all his endeavour is wholly bent to make worke for the Hangman, and draw soules to his In­fernall Kingdome.

And amongst all the [...]icks and [Page 3] sleights which this Grand cunning Master of mischiefe doth use, to bring us to destruction with all, there is no one policy of his that is more prevalent and advantagious to him, than is the sowing of discord and debate betwixt Man and Wife; and although he hath a thousand innumerable wayes for the ef­fecting of his damnable projects and purposes, yet Jealousie is the chiefe and maine Engine to bring it so to passe, that modesty shall be turn'd into mad­nesse, peace into strife, and love into hatred and mischiefe, as shall be shewed in this short following Treatise.

About the latter end of August last, 1638. this hellish fire of Jealousie did most strangely inflame five Women, whom my Pen should not name, nor should they be knowne by any writing of mine, but that they and their mad and barbarous proceedings are too much true, and too many wayes scat­tred and spread abroad by sundry Pens and Tongues, some of them making the matter that was (and is) bad e­nough [Page 4] already, worse; some min­cing it, to make it better; some for af­fection, some for malice; some for flat­tery, and some as their idle and vari­ous humours please, doe report it as they list to frame it, not caring whe­ther they speake or write truth or false­hood. The matter hath beene Rim'd upon beyond Reason, and therefore I hold it Reason it should be related with truth, and thus it was.

At the time, or neare the time afore­said, one Master Evans, a Barber in Drury-lane, did chance to meete with one Ioane Ilsley in the Streete, and be­like the woman had formerly kept the said Evans his wife when shee lay in Child-bed, in which season (of Gan­der-month or Wander-month) per­haps the suspicious woman began to be a little inkindled with the sparkles of jealousie: but suspicion is no proofe [...] but Evans afterwards, when hee by chance once met the woman, offered her [...] Pint of Wine, which after some d [...]nyall was at last accepted: So in they [Page 5] went to a Taverne (the Signe of the Phoenix) n [...]re the lower end of Dru­ry-lane, behind, or on the back-side of the Bell, which is an Inne and a Taverne in the Easterne part of the Strand: But they being over their one Pint, in a low Roome, and a Drawer standing at the Tables end, the one sitting on one side of the Boord, and the other on the o­ther side, so that there neither was nor could bee any immodesty said or done at that time: but some busie-body or o­ther went and told Evans his wife, that her Husband was at the Taverne drin­king with Ioane Ilsley, whereupon she went in a heate to the Phoenix, and found them there, upon whom shee bestowed such hot and hasty language as her tongue could afford, which made them breake company, (some of the words were, she told the said Ioane that she was naught with her Husband) But some few daies after, Mistris Evans (being still jealously angry) did breake her minde to some women, her neigh­bours, and withall made a shew to [Page 6] Ioane that her anger was past against her, so that agreement was made, that a Pigge should be eaten at Mistris E­vans her house at night, and that in a faire seeming way Ioane Ilsly should be sent for as a loving guest invited to the Pigge.

At the time appointed the Pigge was roasted, and the women dissembled, were assembled, and simple Ioane was sent for, who (poore wench) not sus­pecting the sharpnesse or sowernesse of the Feast, suspecting nothing, went to them, and being come amongst them, they seemed very friendly and courte­ously to entertaine and bid her wel­come: to whom Mistris Evans said, [...] prethee Ioane, thou art well acquain­ted with my house, goe up into the upper Chamber, and fetch downe some stooles for us to sit on, so inno­cent Ioane went quickly up the staires for stooles, and presently there fol­lowed her three of the five Women, to wit, Evans Wife, one Cox his Wife, and one Fosters Wife; these three had [Page 7] with them a per [...]iworth of Birchin Rods, after whom followed the other two, to wit, one Smiths wife a Broker, & one Mistris Lee a widdow, then they beganne to revile her in most strange manner, and withall to lay hands on her, to plucke her cloathes violently off from her body, but she resisted and strived and strugled with them as long as she could, till at last they tore her apparrell off from her, then having her naked, they beganne their execution, some to hold her, and some to whippe her, so that the smart, and their harsh usage inforc'd her to beginne to cry; which they perceiving stopt her mouth [...]ith a clout or a handkerchiefe: Then [...]the first penny-worth of rods being wasted to the st [...]mps they fetch'd, or sent for two penny-worth more [...] and after they had whipped them out upon her, they sent for one penny-worth more: (still stopping her mouth, that her crying might not be heard) Shee being thus naked, and all gore-bloo­dy, [Page 8] they cald up [...] bade him bring up a Bason of water, & a Razor, which the boy did; but when he came within the Chamber doore he was abashed and ashamed, and threw downe the Razor and Bason, running downe the staires as fast as hee could: the one of the women tooke up the Razor, meaning to doe I know not what with it. But Ioane being used thus harshly by them, and in bodily feare of some worse abuse, did strive against them, in which scuming shee received a cut, or wound in her backe, neare the shoulder, with the Razor.

This extreamity being past, these Women (if I may so call them) had [...] much modesty as to make fast [...] Apron, or halfe a Kir [...]e before her, o­ver the fore-part of her body, and as she was, being cut, whipped, and all bloody over, they haled and thrust her downe the staires, and pump'd her at a Pumpe which was in Evans his backe [...]ide: after that they thrust her [Page 9] into the streete, (i [...] being betweene ten, and eleven of the Clocke at night) and from the streete (or Dr [...]ry Lane) they puld and [...]ug [...]her (with her haire a­bout her eares) into a Court called Reine-Deere Court, where at a Pumpe they held her under the spout, and pump'd Water upon her, and us'd her more shamefully than is fit to write of, still stopping her mouth with a clout [...] also in the Yard, at the last Pumpe, there were two men that did abuse her, one Smith was one: but shee striving with them had her Kirtle or Apron torne off from her, so [...]at shee had nothing to cover her [...]rkasse, but the darknesse of the Night.

At last this bu [...]ling was overheard by an honest Coach-man, whose name is Thomas Finch, who marvailing what it might bee that made such a stirre at that time of night: hee and his Wife comming to the Pumpe, finding a Woman in such a pittifull plight, so [Page 10] handled by such rough and pittilesse Creatures, he (in humanity) rescued her from them, and suddenly pluck'd off his Horse-mans Coate, and coverd her nakednesse: whereupon her Adversa­ries (or lawlesse executioners) all for­sooke her, and dispers't themselves, it is no great matter whither.

The Coach-man demanded of the poore abused creature what she was, and wherefore they had used her so cruelly: and she answer'd, that shee was a poore yong Woman that did get her living by Nursing and keeping of Childe-bed Women, and also that sometimes shee did attend and kee [...] sicke folkes, and that she at that ti [...] was a Keeper or Waiter on a si [...]ke Gentleman (a Captaine) at the signe of the Helmet in the Strand: he asked her further where her cloathes were, and wherefore those women had us'd her so? and she answer'd him, that they had torne and rent her cloathes in pie­ [...]es, and also that shee had five shillings [Page 11] of money in one of her Pockets: wher­upon the Coach-man did pitty her hard estate and usage, and withall did bring her presently home to the afore­said Signe of the Helmet, where shee dwelt, and doth remaine yet to this twelfth of October, 1638. being much bruised and hurt, and spets blood.

Now Reader I imagine you have not heard of such a mad crew of Sha­vers, Whippers, and politicke Pum­pers; nor doe I thinke that any Penne, or relation of tongue or History doth mention the like.

After shee had recoverd a little [...]rength, she procured Warrants from [...] Justice of the Peace; which when the matter was heard and understood, they were bound all of them to answer for this outrage to the Woman, the spoiling of her, and her Apparrell, and the losse of her money; but they did put in good Baile for their appearance at the Sessions, and on the eight and twentieth of September they went to [Page 12] Westminster to save their Baile and Re­cognisence: (Quarter Sessions being then holden there) from which tryall, they have by a Writ of Sursarara re­mov'd their cause up to the right ho­nourable Court of Kings Bench, but as they were returning homeward, some women (belike that had heard of their desperate and unmannerly ex­ployts) as soone as they saw them passe did raile on them, and revile them most scoldingly eloquent; and withall so embroydered them with dirt, which they cast at them, that they seemed more like Ladies of the soyle, than wo­men of any meane degree. And thus have these five foolish women run [...] themselves into sixe pecks of trouble: How it will bee answered and ended time will shew, if the Reader hath the patience to stay so long.

These are the fruits of mad-braind, Hare-braind, shallow-braind jealousie; for as the Pedegree of cure (or remedy) may bee thus delineated: Itch begat [Page 13] Scratch [...] Scratch was the Father of Scabbe; Scabbe begat Sore, to whom Smart succeeded; then Smart was the Father of Paine; Paine begat Griefe, who was the Sire of Care, and Care be­gat Cure: So Idle thoughts are the fa­thers of Whisperings; Whisperings be­gat Pratling, Babling, Talking, Lying, Slandering; these Mongrels are for the most part begotten at Gossippings, and are the incurable Issues or Fistu­laes of wicked mindes: from them Fame sends out Rumour, Report, and Heare-say; and they set Malice, Backe­biting, and Slander on worke, who are so double diligent in their damnable Devices, that they doe never cease working, till such time as they have h [...]led Jealousie by the eares out of the Dungeon of Hell: and sure there is no Tiger or Beare when they are rob­bed, or bereaved of their Whelpes, so divelish mad as a jealous man or wo­man.

It hath beene indeed too often [Page 14] knowne that Beauty hath beene the ruine of Chastity, (if grace guide and guard it not) and as the flattery of men may overcome the weaknesse of wo­men, so the wiles and snares of subtile Strumpets have intangled and ruin'd too many men; for [...]ole, Deianeira, and Omphale, were too hard for Hercules, and one of them made him lay by his Club, and fall to spinning with a Di­sta [...]fe. The Queene of Love subdu'd the god of Warre, and the same Venus naked, did foile Pallas who was arm'd on Mount Ida: and whosoever hee be that sowes kisses on such lips as are lasciviously manur'd with the dung of temptation, shall be sure to reape [...] Harvest either of contempt, diseases, beggery, and defamation; for the world is full of examples and presiden [...]s of many thousand, that have reap'd such a crop as they have sowne.

That man that is yoak'd with a scold, that will be jealous without cause; o [...] ­ly because she will be so; and for that [Page 15] surmise and slander shee like a Devill doth make her house her Husbands continuall Hell: Surely such a man is partly happy, if withall hee hath the vertue of Patience, (as wife Socrates had with his Xantippe) for hee that is match'd with such a Fiend, hath no need to care where he goes, nor what society he keeps; nor hath he reason to be affraid of any harme that any wicked company can doe him, for the Devill himselfe will not hurt him that is match'd with one of his Sister. But if any shuttle-witted fellow, that is wed­ded to a chaste and modest woman, and is so farre troubled with a wild buzzing [...]d-flye in his braines, that he nothing but dreames of supposed invisible Hornes, such a kind of Cacadudgeon C [...]xcombe, doth justly deserve to have beene match'd to a wench whose heeles had beene lighter than his head, and then hee might meritoriously have made a Combe of a Fire-forke, and worne an Oxe-feather in his Hat with­out [Page 16] wrong or injury: in a word, there is nothing can grieve or torment the heart either of a good man or woman, than to finde their truth, constancy, loyalty, and honest integrity suspected or question'd; for let it be truely weighed and considered, what hurt or occasion of suspicion can be for a man to give a woman a part of one Pint of wine, in an open low roome in a pub­lick Taverne? it is not to bee doubted but such accidents doe happen dayly, at the least a thousand, and yet for all that there is not one Whoore or Cuckold the more: but when as rashnesse addes waxen wings (like those of Icarus) of indiscretion and inconsideration, and that either the man or the woman are mounted or soar'd aloft to the height of Love-killing hell-borne jealousie, then doth the furious heate and flame of rage melt those deceitfull and suspi­cious wings, wings whereby the jea­lous party drops and tumbles downe headlong into the bottomelesse Ocean [Page 17] of irreperable disgrace and infamy.

The envy and inveterate hate of wicked women is almost past thought; Envy is the mistresse of injustice; it stirreth and inciteth both the thought and the hand to all ill and wicked acti­ons: and that envy which is secret and hidden, is more to bee feared than that which is open and manifest: such was the secret malice of this Barbers wife, whose jealousie did burne a great while within her, and at length her envy did burst out into a flame, and so hath brought ruine and disgrace to her and her Husband, which is so farre distant: And if any woman be so full of wrath and revengefull as this woman is, and her associates, and especially if they know that they have power of com­mand, or authority, they will soone bring all to destruction: for they will plot either to poyson, stob, or else some ther way make their will and passions their Law: and therefore I advise all to learne this saying, rather to be affraid [Page 18] of that renowne and credit which is dishonest and shamefull, for they plot­ted this businesse, because they would he talk'd on hereafter. Suppose this I [...]e had beene guilty of a fault, must these Women be their owne reven­gers, their owne witnesses, their owne Judges? must they have the Law in [...]eir owne hands, thus to usurpe [...] [...] wholsome Lawes, and make havo [...] of a woman in this un [...]ill mann [...] Women shall I call them [...] nay, rather monsters: or else some evill spirit in their shapes, to commit such inhumane and unnaturall acts as these: such acti­ons they be that are past example, nay; never the like heard of, to commit such uncivill actions, and upon their owne Sexe, whose civill carriage should be example to the younger sort; their actions were such, as I said before, that I blush to relate them, and ought not to be divulg'd no lowder than a whis­per: The Heathens that knew not God would not have done the like: [Page 19] nay, the wilde beasts of the wildernesse would have pursu'd to de [...]th such beasts as rapin'd and live upon the spoyle of other beasts; they themselves punish, and shall these creatures hate these acts which a Christian commits, and we commit them? but their pu­nishment no doubt will be inflicted up­on them according to their deserts; and my second part, which I will shortly publish, shall shew their confessions and their punishments: And so I end this Relation, wishing their sufferings may be an example to others, that none dare attempt such un­civill and immodest actions here­after.