[Page] PLATOES Cap. Cast at this Yeare 1604, being Leape-yeere.


LONDON Printed for Jeffrey Chorlton. 1604.

[...] [Page] ble Venus, till all the States smile at him, if your Glances be not too full of yron-moulds, I presume you will fling one smile at our button-Cap, and I wish no higher:


A smile is constant and doth gild each Stile:
But laughter is the Foole of euerie smile.

The wonders we entreat of here haue little harme in them, you may take more hurt in a Barbers shop, if you sit there fasting, than all my prognosticating Comedie, or comicke Prognostication aymes at, and if these Euents chaunce to happen, they will bee but merrie ones, for they wish il to none, but to those that wish ill to themselues, and none can iustly ex­cept at this, but those that cannot well read it, for there is great difference betweene rea­ding and reading wel, for those that read wel haue a good tongue of their owne, and spoile nothing in the spelling, and to such I cast vp my Cap, both in Paules-churchyard, Popes­head Alley, and at Temple-barre.

Yours for a Raynie day. Adam Euesdropper.

❧ MIHILL MER­curie the Pothecarie in praise of the Booke.

IF I haue skill,
This Booke's not ill,
But chast and pleasant:
If I knew the Author,
I sweare by my Daughter,
I'de giue him a Pheasant.
Nor doe you wonder
You writers of Thunder,
I know not the Poet.
Tis the Bookes prayse I write,
But I would not for a mite
Haue hee himselfe know it.
For if hee should spye it,
I'de flatly deny it,
He would fret, chafe, & Nestle.
Stampe more in a minute
Then I in a Sennet
At home with my Pestle.
Therefore my best way
Is, not long heere to stay,
Because I'me no fighter.
[Page] This course then I tooke,
To commend the Booke,
But not meddle with the writer:
And because his Art
Is so pretty and tart,
And his inke so well sauourd,
I sweare by my simples,
A Nose full of pimples
Is verie ill fauourd:
For so he doth prognosticate, and showes
A white flaxe beard wasts with a fierie Nose.
See where he comes, I dare not stay, I flye:
All Enuies poyson goe with Mercurie.
The same Hand againe.


THE Reuolution of this present yeere 1604, takes his be­ginning, at what time the Sun en­ters into the first minute of Aries, when many a scold shall be found in Ramme-Alley, whose tongues will neuer linne iangling, vntill the Sunne enter into another Signe, as the Myter, or rather some bow­zing Tappe-house, where they must all drinke themselues friends againe, till they are able to speak no more than a drownd [Page] Rat, and then by that time, I hope they will be quiet.

Next I find, that the Sunne entring into Taurus, it will bee exceeding good this yeere for the Butchers both in Southwarke, Eastcheape, and Saint Nicholas Shambles, for hee takes his entrance iust vpon Easter Tuesday, to the deposing of Lent, and the ouerthrow of salt Sammon, and fresh Cod, and to the restoring againe of Heroick-valiant Beefe, that ancient and surly Courtier, that neuer appeares without a messe of Mustard his Gentleman-vsher barehea­ded before him: Red Herring may goe hange himselfe then for a Tweluemonth vppon the rusty beame of some Farmers chimney, vntill the hungry Ploughboyes cut him downe and quarter him: for Oli­uer Offall the Butcher will bee fatte and flourish, and Gregorie Gizzern the Poul­ter will bring foorth his Progenies of Partridges, Plouers, and Blacke­birds, and what a pitifull sight it will bee for poore Wayters and Trencher-bearers to see wise men their Maisters feed vpon Woodcockes.

[Page] From thence the Sunne trauailes into Gemini, not into Germanie, (as some Mechanicke-readers will read Germa­nie for Gemini) and then Mayds beware of two at once, or two at a Birth, if you loue to preserue your owne Credits, but you especially this double signe threatnes most, that liue in Marchants houses amongst wanton Springals your Fel­low-seruants, and are at midnight at the massacre, and sacking of a Posset, when your sober Master and continent Mistres are in their first sleepe, and little dreame of your Sinamon and Sugar, which are alwayes the two sweete Presenters of a Sack-Posset, the Sceane being layd in a Bowle, or a Bason, and the Actors some halfe a dozen of siluer Spoones, which seldome are out of their parts, vntill all bee eaten: there is much perill and danger in this Signe, you Damo­sels of seauenteene, and one and Twen­tie: therefore if I might counsell you, you should bee your owne Pothecaries, and preserue your honesties better than Bar­beries: Goe to bed presently after your Master and Mistresse, saue candles and Candles, [Page] pound, for there is craft nowe adayes in waighing of Candles, and great pol­licie in the vttering of Puddings.

Next the Sunne takes his Iourney into the stinging Signe Scorpio, and then beware of Brokers, Vsurers, and Pettifoggers the Scorpions of a king­dome, come not in their villaynous clut­ches all that Moneth especially, for they will make you pay well for it, more in one Moneth, than you shall bee able to recouer againe a whole Tweluemonth after.

But entring into Sagittarius, it will bee passing good for the Fletchers in Grubstreet, and all the Caualeero Bow­yers, tweluescore Prickes will be in sea­son, and those may shoote at Bun-hill, that are non-suited at Westminster Hall.

After this the Sunne mounts into Capricorne, and then woe bee vnto you that are Horne-madde, and haue three Acres at Cuckolds Hauen, you are well landed then, for one Acre there, is more than euer you will bee able to make away as longe as you liue: This Signe [Page] raignes Ielosie vppon men and women, vppon ould frostie men that haue young lustie wiues, and vppon ould riueld wo­men, that haue young beardlesse Hus­bands, for the [...] poyson of Ielosie swelles the bosomes of vnequall Bed­fellowes, and a peece of a Vnicornes Horne can helpe any man but a Cuc­kold, whereby that ould moth-eaten Prouerbe is verified, which sayes, One mans meate, is another mans poyson: For if he should take it downe, he would thinke it woulde breede more Hornes within him: such is the strange proper­tie of inuincible Ielousie, that is stron­ger than the great Spanish Armado in Eightie eight.

Next the Sunne enters into Aquarius, and then there will bee good dooings for Water-men, many wanton meetings at Brandford, fresh-water Voyages to Blacke-wall and Greenewich, reuelling and domineering among amiable Lads and young Wenches ouer the water: but that which I finde most lamentable in this watry Signe Aquarius, and most to be feared of all those that loue valiant [Page] Licour, is the single-sole disposition of Brewers that will put to much Thames in their Beere, and I feare mee make it hop but of one legge, and that so lame­ly too, that a little thing will make it hoppe quite into the Thames againe: and because Ale-brewers and they are Brothers, it is as much to bee doubted on the other side, that each Ale-brewer will play the Iewe of Malta, and put but a little Malt in the Ale: so I hope there will bee fewer Red-noses this yere than was of a Yeere a great while, a­mongst the baser Ranke, and as for Tauerne-whiffers. I doe not thinke but the honest vertuous Vintners will take an order, and asswage the despe­rate and furious humors of their Wines, with a good sober quantitie of faire temperate Water: nor can I much blame them, for after the Reckoning hath been discharged and all, you should haue some cast it vp againe before the Vintners face, and thinke themselues misreckoned in the Pottle, vntill they see two Gallons apparently lye vppon the floare before their eyes, and then [Page] they will beleeue it, and therefore good sober Vintners I will not condemne, but rather applaud the watring of your Wine: for by that honest-profitable po­licie, those that are your common Wine­suckers will surfette and bee sicke tenne times, ere they bee drunke once, and so much for the Sunnes taking Barge in Aquarius.

The Twelfe and last, is when hee turnes golden Angler, and catches Pis­ces, and then woe bee vnto you that are dissolute full mouth'd Swearers, for you will neuer catch Haddockes as longe as you breath, for you shall ne­uer heare a true Fisher indeede, sweare beyonde Coddes-fish, and no oath at all that hath any flesh in it: In this last and finnye Signe Pisces, there will bee odde dooinges in ould Fish-streete, Lobsters will bee no meate for Lob­cockes, as long as they passe for two Shillinges apeece, Maydes will bee no Fish for Harlotts, nor Soles for Brokers, the one wanting continence and the other conscience, marry Gud­ginnes will bee your onely Dish for [Page] Countrey Gentlemen, such as are come to their Landes, before they come to their Witte, and are one and Twen­tie yeare ould in Acres, but scarce sca­uen in discretion or manners, such as these may fitly dwell at Fishers Folly, when they haue made away all their Fish Pondes in the Countrey, and this shall suffize for the Sunnes Twelue strides into the Twelue Signes.

NOW FOR GENE­rall dispositions in all Rancks of people whatsoeuer, bred by variable, womanish, and vn­constant Planets.

THe great coniunction of Sa­turne and Iupiter, changed from the watrie Triplicity to the fierie, is to bee no­ted specially (as our Prog­nosticators [Page] would haue it) neuerthelesse I hope there will be small hurt done by fire this yeere, because Faggots, Bil­lets, and Char-cole beare such a price, that no poore snake is able to purchase them, and the most daunger for fire lyes in their Cottages, because for the most part they are lowe, ould, and rotten, and as for rich men they could build vp their houses againe: but those which most preuent this great and si [...]rie Con­iunction, are Vsurers, and Niggards, both which are sure to haue no sparkle flying, or lying about their houses, for they will haue neuer a cole in their chim­neys.

This hotte Coniunction being but badly affected, shewes, that those which were widdowes the last Yeere, will be catcht vp this yeere, more for wealth and spending-money, than for loue and honesty, they shall haue many gallant sui­ters, that will carie all their Lands vpon their backes, and yet sweare they haue grounds, Backsides, & yards, when they haue no more Ground thā the Kings high way, no more Backsides than one, and no [Page] Tauerne-potts shall flye from one end of the Roome to the other, and doe much hurt, if they light vppon mens Pates: Many crackt Crownes shall passe cur­rant thorough Cheape-side by Gold­smith stalles, and yet neuer suspected: Many terrible Frayes in Smithfield between sergeants and Gentlemen, mar­rie sergeants will winne the day, and get the Victorie, especially if they bee sixe to one, then there is no remedye but the Counter in Woodstreete must part the fray: there shall bee a dread­full warre betweene the wife and the husband for Superioritie, in so muche that the good man shall be faine to giue ouer first, cry mum, and let her doe what shee will all the yeere after.

Shrewd Tempests shall arise about Cole-harbour, and many a maide shall be cast away about Westminster: there shal be a Battaile between the feure knaues at Cards for superioritie, and between false Dice and true, for antiquitie.

Women that weare longe gownes shall bee glad to take vp their cloathes in the street, when it raynes, although a [Page] hundred men stand and looke vppon them, yet they shall blush no more to hold them vp if it bee verie durtie, then men to make water in broad day at the Pissing Conduit if they haue need.

The Bakers, Woodmongers, But­chers, and Brewers, shall fall to a migh­tie conspiracie this yeare, so that no man shall haue bread, fire, flesh, or drinke without credite or readie monney: Bar­bers shall be mightily out of worke this yeere, by reason of the French disease, for many shall loose their Haire, before they can come to their shops, and so put them quite out of worke: and Beards shall bee Commodities hard to bee got­ten, but more hard to bee kept, for ma­ny haires will start out this yeere that will neuer come in againe, but perish and droppe downe by the way: And amongest all other Trades and Occu­pations, Masons poore soules shall be much troubled with the Stone this yeere, if there chaunce to bee any great Buildings, as by my skill I finde no lesse: marrie I doubt Powles will scarce haue a new Steeple this yeere, [Page] and in that, I thinke I shall bee the truest Prognosticator, that writ Alma­nackes this twentie Twelue-months: The Gowt, I find, will keepe a foule Racket this yeere, and play at Ten­nis in a Vsurers puft Toe, but his ga­ping Sonne and Heire shall haue little hope of his dying, i'le put him in that Comfort, because hee may linger yet a­boue Seauen yeeres longer, and his Toe serue out aboue foure Prentiships to the Gowt.

Taylors shall bee mightily troubled with the stich, and sowe many false seedes which shall peepe out, before a Moone come about, and hauing a Hell of their owne, beeing but a bare boord betweene, woe bee to peeces of white Fustian-linings, for they fall in with their heeles vpward, Satten is the cheefest Diuell there, and domineeres ouer all inferiour Blackes. Veluet that ould Reueller and braue Courtier, lyes there most tragically dismembred, poore Perpetuano is perpetually damn'd, and desperate Rash fals in headlong.

Onely in this all Taylors are most true,
They damne false bodies, & giue them their due.

And what a lamentable thing it is on the other-side, that so many of our English women should weare French Bodies, and be a scorne and by-iest to all riotous Nations.

But shal I discouer to the world won­drous euents indeed, and tell how Mus­cadine in Vintners Sellers shall indite their Maisters this yeere of Commixti­on, and arraigne them at their owne Barre: and how Bayliffes and Mar­shals men shall bee content to arrest any man, if they can catch him.

Poore men shall be accounted Knaues without occasion, and those that flatter least, shall speede worst, and neuer bee woorth Three Hundred a yeere, if they should liue vntill Doomes-day: Many shall eate vppon other mens Tren­chers, and surfette vppon other mens Costs, but scarce feede vppon Holland Cheese in their owne Chambers.

The Palsey will be a verie shrewd [Page] disease this yere, for some shall haue it in their heads, and shake so long till they haue no more wit in their braines then Wil. the Bel-ringer: some shall haue a Palsey in their Teeth, in so much that they shall eat more in a weeke, then they wil be able to pay forin a twelue-moneth, Othersome shall be troubled with a Pal­sey in their hands, and those are your rio­tous elder Brothers that can keepe no­thing fast, but will shake all the mon­ney out of their handes that comes in to them, Videlicet, in Tauernes, Ten­niscourts, and Dicing-houses, and last­ly some shall haue a Palsey in their feete, and will not bee able to stand to any thinge but shake and reele from the stall into the Channell, your excellent Reele-pots, and so I leaue them full in a puddle.

Some there shall bee which shall haue such a smell in their Nostrils that no Feast shall escape them without they haue share in it.

But Consumptions this Yeere are dangerously threatned, by the fierie co­pulation of those two surly & ambitious [Page] Planets, for some shall bee so consu­med in their members, as they shall finde neuer a good Tongue in their heads, some so consumed in conscience, that they will take aboue Fortie in the Hundred, and more too if they can get it, othersome so consumed by inchastity, that if the Constable should search them, hee should finde about them verie little honestie.

Those that singe Bases this yeere shall loue to take their licour soundly, and Trumpeters that sound Trebles shall stare by custome.

There shall be many Fortune-tellers, that shall shut a Knaue in a Circle, and looking about for a Diuell finde him lockt in their bosomes.

Many straunge euents shall happen and befall this yeere in those houses where Virgo is predominant with a ma­ster, but wants a Mistresse to looke nar­rowly vnto her, for the influence of the Grocers shops being eleuated within a few sweet degrees presageth that some shamelesse Drabbes shall bee still gad­ding about the streetes for figges, al­monds, [Page] and Confects, and that with­out regarde of eyther Witte or Hone­stie.

Great Mistes and Fogges will a­rise and fall this yeare, so that some shall not see but to take their Neigh­bours bed for their owne, and if Watch­candles could tell tales, they would make you laugh, though your wiues went to burying.

Many men shal be so venterously dis­posed, that they shall go into Brothel­houses, and yet come out againe as ho­nestly, as when they went first in.

Bakers shall thriue by two thinges this yeare, skores well payed, and Mil­lers that are honest, which are as rare to bee founde now a dayes, as blacke Swannes, and white Rauens. Long bearded men shall not bee the wisest: nor the most grauest in lookes, the most holy in life.

The Haberdashers by the naturall o­peration of this coniunction, are very for­tunate. For olde Hats new trunde shall not last long, and new Hats for the most part shall haue olde trimming: and so by [Page] this meanes foysting Iohn shall thriue better by his knauerie, then any plaine dealing Iohn about London by the Ta­lent of his honestie: and so I end, wishing all the Felts in his shop no more wicked­der Blocke then his owne Pate, and then I am sure they will be so farre from good fashion, that no honest man in Eng­land woulde bee hyred to weare them: and so farewell Iohn, tis good lucke some times they say, to end with a &c.


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