A most excellent description vvhat one true and perfect friend ought to doe for another. Also how to choose such a friend, with most perfect councells how to gouerne thy selfe in securitie: both pleasant to reade, and profitable to followe.
THe famous philosopher Plato, being asked by his scholers, why he went so often from Athens into Sicilia, the way being long, and the sea very tempestuous, and perillous to trauerse and passe: he answered them: the occasion that moues me to goe and come so often from Athens into Sicilia is for no other cause, but onely to see my friende Phocion, a man very excellent in his works and learning: wise in his sayings, and iust and true in his wordes: and also for that he is my great friend, and enimie to vice, and a louer and follower of vertue, I goe [Page]willingly to ayde him to my power, and to consult with him of all things that I know. And further he sayd: you ought to knowe, my good schollers, that a good Philosopher, or wise man, to visite and succour his friends, to practise and conferre with him, ought to estéeme the voiage little, and the [...]: yea though he should saile ouer the sea, or should iourney ouer all the land. Apollonius Tianeus a notable philosopher. Appollonius Tianeus parted from [...], passed through all Asia, did saile ouer the great floud Nylus, Nilus a famous Riuer in Egipt. endured the coldes of the mount Caucasus, The moūtaine Caucasus, a famous mountaine extreame colde. & suffered the great hoards of the Ryphean mountaines, The Riphean mountaine extreame hoate. passed the landes of the Massagets, entred into the great India, making this long peregrination & trauel for no other respect, but to visite and conferre with Hyarchos the Philosophor, this great friend Agesilaus, sometime a famous Captaine among the Greekes, hauing knowledge that the king Hytarius did hold prisoner another Captaine [Page]his very friend, leauing and setting apart al his affaires and trauels thorough infinite countries, till he came to the king, and after most humble and reuerent salutation sayd these wordes: I beseech thee most renowned king, that it may please thée to pardon Mynotus, my singular friend, and thy humble subiect: and all that it shall please thee in fauour to doe for him, I shall and will account it done to myselfe. And I assure thée, O king, thou canst not chastice, or punish his person, but that thou shalt giue vnto me feeling of the lyke torment, that thou giuest or causest to be done to him. The king Herode, after that Marcus Antonius was vanquished by the Emperor Augustus, Marcus Antonius a noble Romaine and of great auctoritie. he came to Rome, and set his crowne at the féete of Augustus;, and with a bolde hearte spake vnto him these words: thou shalt now know, O Augustus, if thou doest not already knowe it, that if Marcus Antonius had rather [Page]beléeued me then his friend Cleopatra, Cleopatra Queene of Egipt after the death of Marcus Antonius, enclosed her self in a tombe full of liue serpents, & so ended her life, for the great loue shee bare vnto Marcus Antonius her louer. thou shouldest haue prooued how great an enimie he had béene to thée. And thou shouldest likewise haue knowen, how great a friend I had béene to him, as yet I am: but he as a man yt would rather gouerne himselfe by the will of a woman, then be ledde by reason and wisedome, he tooke of me mony, and of Cleopatra councell: and sée here my Realme, my person and my Crowne here at thy féete, which I offer willingly to thée to dispose at thy will and pleasure: but with this consideration, O inuincible Augustus, that no punishment or hurt be done, vpon my Lord and friend Marcus Antonius. For a true friend will not forsake his friend, not for the perill of death, nor after his death, be forgetfull or vnmindfull of him, although his person be absent. By these examples and many other, that I could bring, it maybe considered, what fayth and fidelytie one true [Page]friend oweth to an other, and what perils one of them ought to aduenture for an other: for it is not sufficient, that one friend be sory for an other, for their mishaps or euill fortunes, but to put them selues euen to the daunger of death, rather then to faile his friend in his extreame néed.
Hée then of good right ought to be called a friend, and esteemed as true and perfect, that dothe willingly offer, ¶ Note how to know a perfect friend. departe, and giue to his friend those things that he lacketh, before he asketh his ayde: and yt spéedely commeth to succor & helpe his friend, béeing in peril, without calling, or sending for. And therefore there is not, nor can not be in this world, better friendshippe, thē this that I haue spoken of, which is that commeth with a frée heart of himselfe to ayde his friend in necessitie, and to succor him when he is in griefe or sorrow: further we ought to know, that to continue and make perfect friendship, thou oughtest not to [Page]enter into friendshippe with many: following the counsell that Seneca the Philosopher gaue to his friend Lucillus, willing him to be the onely friend to one, and enimie to none: for the number of friends causeth greate importunity, the which causeth perfect amity to diminish for considering well the liberty of our hearte, it is impossible, that one man should, or can conforme or dispose his nature and condition to the will and liking of many: nor that many should conforme themselues to the desire and liking of one. Tully and Salust were two Orators in Roome, very renomed amongst the Romaines: which two Orators were mortall enimies: and during their enimities, Tully had for his friendes all the Senators in Roome, and Salust had no other friend in Roome but Marcus Antonius: and one day these two Orators, being in contention in wordes togither, Tully with great disdaine did reproch [Page] Salust, saying vnto him: what canst thou doe, or enterprise in Roome against me? for wel thou knowest, that in all Roome thou hast to thy friend but onely Marcus Antonius, and that I haue in Roome no enimie but him. Salust, made him a ready answere: thou makest great bragges, O Tully, for that thou hast but one enimie, mocking me, that I haue but one friend: but I hope in the immortall gods, that all thy friends shall not be able to defend thée from destructiō, and that this one friend of mine if all be of power sufficient to kéepe mée from daunger against thée and all thy adherents: and so it came to passe within fewe daies after, that Marcus Antonius caused Tully to be slaine, and did aduance Salust to great auctority and honour. A friend may part to another body with all that he hath, as bread, wine, golde, siluer, and all other his temporal goods, but not ye hart: for that can not be parted nor giuen [Page]to more then one: for this is true and certaine: many hold it for great glory to haue many friendes, but if they consider to what purpose: such a number of friendes serue for no other cause, but to eate, drinke, walke, and talke together: not to succor them in their necessities, with their goods, fauour and credits, nor brotherly to reproue them of their vices and faults, where in truth, where is a perfect amite, neither my friend to me, nor I to my friend ought neuer to dissemble but one to tell another their vices and faults: A perfect friend a great measure. for in this world is not founds so great a treasure that may be compared to a true and perfect friend, considering that to a true and assured friend, a man may discouer the secrets of his hearte, and recounte to him all his griefes, trust him with things touching his honour, and deliuer him to keep his goods and treasures, which will sucour vs, in our paines and trauels, councell vs in all perrilles [Page]and daungers, reioyce with vs in our prosperityes, and will be sorrowfull with vs in our aduersities, and disgraces of fortune. Finally, I conclude, that a faithfull friend doth neuer fayle to ayde vs during his life, nor to complaine & mourne for vs after our death. I agrée that gold and siluer is good, and parents and kinred, but farre better is true friends, without comparison: for that all other things cannot helpe vs in our necessity, if by fortune it happen that we be plonged in troubles, but riches many times doth danger vs, yea & doth further increase our perill, and deceiueth vs, making vs to enterprise vnprofitable attempts, leading vs to the toppes of craggy mountaynes, from which, we fall in great perrill, and perpetuall ruine: but a true friend séeing or hearing his friend in daunger or heauines doth minister to him of his goods, trauell and daunger his person, takes long and paynfull voiages, enters into [Page]debates and speches, and doth hazard his person, onely to helpe and release his friend out of perill, with suche a pure affection & amitie, that he would yet doe more for him if it were in his power: hauing then presupposed that it is necessary to choose a friend, & only to vse him alone, great consideration is to be had in the choyce and election of such a one, least thou finde thy selfe deceiued in thy trust, in vttering thy secretes to him: How to chose a perfect friend. haue regarde that he be not couetous, vnpacient, or angry: a great talker, seditious, or a mouer of strife, neither presumptuous: for if he be infected with these vices, thou wert better to haue him thine enimie, then to choose him for thy friend: but thy perfect friend ought to be of good conditions, and honest customes: that is to be gentle of nature, wise in his purposes, and paynefull in trauels, patient in iniuries, sober in eating and drinking good in councell giuing: and aboue all faythfull and constant [Page]in amity, and kéeping thy secretes: and such a one thou maist surely choose for thy friend. And where want and defaylance shalbe of these conditions, to flye his friendship as a daungerous pestilence. Holde this for a certayne thing, that much worse is the amity of a fayned friend and fantasticall, then the malice of an open enimie. We se none will buie a horse, till first he hath séene him goe, and wel vewed him: silke nor cloath without séeing and féeling it: wine without tasting it: fleshe without cheapening it: nor house without vewing it within: nor instruments without hearing them soūded, and played vppon: by a more great reason thou oughtest in choosing thy friend, to know his behauiour and wisdome and vertues, long before thou admittest him as thy secrete friend. Note the Emperour Augustus order in friendship. The Emperor Augustus was warie & difficil in admitting a special friend, but after he had receiued him into his friendship, he would neuer leaue [Page]him, nor reiecte him for any cause or displeasure. Friendshippe ought to bée exercised with good men, & in vertuous actions: for although a man make his friend Lord of his secretes, and libertie, yet alwayes reason ought to reserue vertue frée. Plutarke saieth in his Politicks, that we were much better, to sell dearely to our friends our good turnes, Note Plutarks opinion. and friendshippes, either in prosperity or aduersitie, then to féeds them with faire & dissembling words, & vaine promises, not meaning to performe any of our friendships offered. I wish these my trauells might be agreable to them, that shall peruse that I haue written of Amity, and choise of a friend, hauing writte fréely, without flattery. Saluite in his booke of the Iugurthine warres, shews that it is no lesse commendation for a writer to write truly the valiant acts of the worthy, then to the conquerour to haue executed his charge with valure and worthinesse of [Page]armes: for often it happeneth, the captaine to be slaine in gaining the battaile and victory, yet faileth he not to be reuiued by good reputation, Good fame remaineth after death, that he gained before his death, being set downe in true history by the writer. Good counsell is of great efficacie in a friend: Marcus Aurelius a famous empeour of Rome. as said Marcus Aurelius to his secretary Panucius, saying that a man with money may satisfie and recompence many pleasures and good turnes done him, but to reward good counsell all the goods had néede to satisfie and recompence. If we will beléeue auncient historyes, we shall finde it true, that the vertuous Emperors, fortunate Kings, and hardy Captaines, going to the warres, to conquere their enimies, haue alwaies bene desirous to haue in their company some discréete and learned philosopher, as well to counsell with, as also to recorde in writing their aduentures and noble faets. Great Alexander [Page]had Aristotle: King Gyrus, Chilon: King Ptholome, Pithimon: King Pirrhus Zatvru: The notable emperors and kinges haue esteemed learned men greatly. the emperour August Simonides Scipio, Sophocles: the emperour Traian, Plutarke: the emperour Antonius p [...] Georgias. The company of al these philosophers and excellent men of the worlde serued only for good counsell, wherein their services deserued praise: as did the valiant Captaines, by their hardinesse & manhood. The emperour Nero asked Seneca the philosopher, what he thought of Scipio the Affrican and [...]a to the Censor: he answered the emperour that it was: As Armes is necessarie so is learning also. as necessary that Cato should be borne into the worlde, for the common wealth, as Scipio to, for the warres: for as much, as the good Cato, by his counsell did: chace the vices out of the common wealthe: and Scipio by his actiuity and valiantnesse in armes, did chastice the enimy of the common wealth. And surely who shall followe the counsell here [Page]written, shal finde them necessary and profitable: and shal help him to assure his estate. For all the troupe of philosophers do affirme, that the felicitie doth not consist in great puissance, nor in hauing worldly riches, To deserue wel is the propertie of good men. but in deseruing wel. For the honour, fauor, and greatnesse of this mortall life is of more practise in them that deserue it then to them that possesse it without deserte, by happe or fortune: for if the earthquakes doo most hurte where be the most costly buildinges, and the tempest and lightning is most extreeme vpon the high mountaines, more then in the vallies, and low planes: and that in the greatest and most proud and most peopled cities, the pestilence doth most rage, more then in other places of smal inhabitation: and the birds be entrapped in the nets vnknowen to them: and the calmnesse of the Sea is token of some great tempest to come: and that after long health sicknesse is most daungerous: so doe [Page]I inferre hereby, that it is necessary for al men to beware of fained friends and beware of falling into ruine and daunger of euil fortune, & entrapping of dissembled friendes. The emperor Augustus asked Virgil how he might long maintaine himselfe in his empire, & be liked of the common weale: he answered, often to examine thy self, O Emperour, and to know that as thou excellest all in estate and degrée, and authority, so oughtest thou to surpasse all other in vertus and noblenesse: which was a most excellent and wise answere. The ancient and wise Historiographers did praise greatly the greatnesse of Alexander, the learning of Ptholome, the instice of Numa Pompilius, the clemency of Iulius Caesar, the patience of Augustus, the veritis of Traian, the pittie of Antonius, the temperance of Constantius, the continency of Scipio, and the humanity of Theodosius: so that these great princes got their great reputation [Page]more by their vertues, then valiancy and great déedes of armes, victories, & tryumphes. One thing is most certaine, that how vicious, dissolute or dissembling a man be, when he considereth, and remembreth his wicked doings, and thinkes what he hath béene, what he he is, It is a wicked thing to dissemble. and what may happen to him, for dissembling with his friends, and other his euill doings, that if any sparke of grace, or any goodnesse remaine in him, he will repent him of his former euil, & it bringeth heauinesse to him, when he hath done wickedly: for so say truly, we neuer receyue so much pleasure and contentment in doing euill, as we shall finde displeasure, griefe, vengeance and punishment, after euil doing. Certaine counsells and good aduertisments I will giue all men, Note these councels. neuer discouer nor declare to any person all that thou thinkest, nether make any priuy how much treasure, or valure in goods thou haste: for if thou canst not [Page]haue all thou desirest, doe not say all thou knoweste, nether doe hurte, to any that thou maiest, and is in thy power to doe: for commonly greate hurte doeth a man procure to himselfe in following his owne will, without resting vpon the rocke of good consideration and reason. The second is to be wary, & carefull, neuer to put to the hazzard of variant fortune those things that concerne thy person, thy estate and goods: for the wise will neuer repose or put themselues in perrill vppon hope, where daunger and perrill is likely to ensue: neither thinke, that all seruices and proffers that shalbe made them in words and friendly protestations shal be performed for commonly those: that most liberally offer their friendships, are slack in performing, ye a sometime redyest, if they sée a man hath néede of him, or that fortune frowne vpon him to whome he professeth great good wil, none shall be found a greater enimie [Page]then he: neuer be thou a medler in other mens businesse, or matters that touth thée not, neither be slacke in following thyne owne: for a time lost in doing thy businesse, the like oportunitye thou shalt neuer finde, or recouer againe: if thou stand in daunger, and that there be hope of helpe, the duties of a perfect friend. spéedily preuent thy mishappe, least by detracting the time all hope of helpe may faile thée: choose them for thy friends assured and faithfull, that will haue care of thée, & hold thée vp frō falling, & not them, do not opresse or hurte the poore. that after thou art fallen will proffer thée their hand to helpe thée vp againe: hurt not those that thou hast power to hurt: for the cryes and cursses of the poore, and sometimes of other, being wronged commeth before the presence of God, demaunding iustice and vengeance: in that thou art of abilitie to do good, help thy friends: parentes and kindred, and also the poore. In counsell that that thou shalt giue, be not affectionate: be not presumptuous, [Page] [...] [Page] [...] [Page]or seuere against them you may commaund: nether doe any thinge without good consideration: kéepe company with them that will speake the trueth, and flée from them that be lyars, flatterers, and dissemblers: for more account is to be made of them, that will forewarne thée of euill that may follow to thée, then to those that will giue counsell after thou hast receyued the hurte: For a wise man is to thinke that although euils commonly happen not to the prouident man, yet to thinke possible they may come, is wisdome: for it happeneth, the shippe soddainely by tempest to wracke, when the Sea is a litle before very calme & quiet, A wise consideration. and the more fauourable thou findest fortune, so much the more haue thou feare that she will be cruell, and despitefull against the: make no small accounte of this little worke, and briefe aduertisment, for experience teacheth vs, that a little diamond is of more estimation [Page]then a great ballays. Consider also, how the time flyeth away, and all things come to an ende: A notable coū cell. and that thou must depart from thy riches, be forsaken of friendes, and thy person to dye, and those that should succéede and follow thée shall vtterly forget thée: and thou shalt not knowe, to whome thy goods and succession, shall come, and lesse how thy children and heires shall gouerne themselues, nor whether they should proue good and vertuous, or not. Chilon the philosopher, being asked what thing he did finde in this worlde vpon which fortune had no power, he answered: there be two thinges onely in this worlde, which time cannot consume, Fame and verity will neuer be couered. nor fortune destroy, that is fame and good reputation of a man, that is written in bookes, and veritie hidde, for that veritye and trueth may be hidde and clowded for a time, but in the ende it will manifeste it selfe: if thou wilt sometime, for the recreation [Page]and contentment of thy spirites. To peruse these councels, here sette downe, thou shalt haue cause to think it a good trauaile, and woorke and time bestowed well. As Suetonius Tranquillus doth write of Iulius Caesar, Time spente vertuously. that among all the warres and continuall following them, he did not ceasse to reade and write some thing, yea being in the campe, and in his tente, commonly in one hande he held his speare, and in the other his penne, to write his commentaries. Man is to make great accounte of the time loste, more then to haue care to kéepe his treasures and riches: for the time being well emploied shall bring him to saluation, and treasures euill gotten shall be the cause of eternall damnation, ouer and besides a great trauaile and wearynesse to the body of man, and greater perrill to his soule, when he occupies all his dayes and all his life in the affaires, of this world, and cannot separate [Page]his mind from these worldly affaires, till he be called to the place, where he must make accounte of all his wretched doings, and leaue his body in the earth, a foode for woormes. And finally, I assure you all that shall reade this shorte aduertisemente and councell; that of all the treasures, ritches, prosperities, seruices, authorities and powers that you haue, and possesse in this your mortal life, you shall carrie nothing with you, but only the time that you haue well employed and spente vertuously, during the course, and time of this your mortall life.