The friers chronicle: or, The true legend of priests and monkes liues

The friers chronicle: or, The true legend of priests and monkes liues

Table of contents

Title page

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TO THE RIGHT HONORABLE THE Countesse of DEVONSHIRE, with all her other well-deseruing VERTVES.

THE FRIERS CHRONICLE: OR, THE TRVE LEGEND OF PRIESTS AND MONKES LIVES.

The Conclusion.

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THE FRIERS CHRONICLE: OR, THE TRVE LEGEND OF PRIESTS AND MONKES LIVES.

Sua cuique, mihi mea.

[figure]

LONDON, Printed for Iohn Budge: and are to be sold at his Shop in Pauls Churchyard, at the Signe of the Greene Dragon. 1623.

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[Page] TUm puppe è media magno clamore Sacerdos:

Parcite pollutis contingere vincula palmis,

Et procul hinc moneo, procul hinc quaecun (que) prophanae

Ferte gradus, nec vos casto miscete labori,

Dum satis est mouisse deae: quod si qua pudica

Mente valet, si qua illae si sibi corporis adstat,

Constat, vel sola subeat pia munera dextra.

Silius Italic. lib. 17. Bell. Punicum.

TO THE RIGHT HONORABLE THE Countesse of DEVONSHIRE, with all her other well-deseruing VERTVES.

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Right Honorable,

ALthough such Ladies as your selfe, are either compared to rich Caskets, containing within thē more richer Iewels, or resembled to precious Diamonds, made the more glorious by [Page] enameling, and the cunning of the workman: yet, I protest, beeing an eye-witnesse of your constant resort vnto wisedomes Feast; and apprehensiue, that you loue Religion meerely for Gods loue: that alone hath incited mee to select you the Patronesse of this Discourse, whereby, I make no doubt, you shall not onely runne with Zacheus to the top of a Figge-tree to behold IESVS: but bee glad in your very soule, that your foot-steps are fixed in the way of saluation, and that you are now going on in the path, that will conduct you to new Ierusalem.

The Worke it selfe is the Discouery of the vnswept corners of Popish Monasteries: The Instrument wherewith it is done, though it bee not the Prophets Lanterne and Candle to search the great Citie: yet it is the opening of a Booke, wherein you may reade such loathsome particulars against Papistry, that in your friends behalfe, you will doe, as wee were wont to doe in England, euen spit at the naming of the Diuell: and in your owne, lift vp [Page] your hands to Heauen with thanksgiuing, that God hath blessed you with a better knowledge.

The Author, is I confesse, no Diuine, but a penitent sinner, and one that would faine striue to be a doore-keeper in the House of GOD, who hath taken this mercy vpon him, to welcome him home with better acates, then to feed with the Hogges at the troughs: My name you shall sure finde at the last, which if it carry an vnpleasant accent, oh bee thus honourable, to admit of one good qualitie, as the mirrour of his time Sir Philip Sidney was wont to say. For a great many haue none, and no man hath all.

Your Honors humbly deuoted,

T. G.

THE FRIERS CHRONICLE: OR, THE TRVE LEGEND OF PRIESTS AND MONKES LIVES.

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I Make no question, but that true and wel written Discourse of the Anatomie of the English Nunnery at Lisbone in Portugall, hath not onely had a gracious acceptation with you, but vvrought vpon your iudgements and vnderstanding, as farre as the abhorring their impieties, and lamenting the seduction of silly Ignorants, vvho, I dare affirme, being brought out into the sunnie splendour of Truth and Discouerie, would either vvonder, where and how they haue been so long detained in darknesse, or make sport at such ridiculous [Page] absurdities, as they haue beene befooled withall.

But because there remaines much more to be spoken out of other Relations, and vndeniable Verity, to make the pride of Babel loathsome to true Christian soules, and the impieties of that Man of sinne abhorred of all iudicious and vnderstanding men: I haue heere vnder-taken further searches for the good of all true-hearted Protestants indeed. And although I haue no such portion allotted, as with the Prophets Lanterne and Candle to search the vnswept corners of Ierusalem; or with Christs rodde of cords to whip the buyers and sellers out of the Temple: yet I hope I shall haue strength enough to wrastle downe the Strumpet, and lay her flat on her back to the hissing of the passengers.

For all the painting of Iezabel, and adorning of her head to seeme more maiesticall to Iehu: she was yet at the last thrown out of the window, and dashed against the ground: so shall Babylon that great Citie beserued, in the end shee shall be set on fire, and the Merchants of the earth shall howle at her desolation, amazed afarre off at her falling to rubbish, and beholding her smoake to ascend, like the smoake of a furnace: vvherein that you may see the reason of Gods indignation, and whereby you may intertaine certaine motiues for your owne conuersion, or establishment; I haue heere taken vpon me to discouer, how the Popish Clergie left and forsooke the [Page] pure waters of Siloa, to drinke the puddled streames of Traditions and filthinesse, scorned to quench their thirst, and buy milke and food without money, but would needs vvith Simon Magus pay deare for spirituall gifts: and in a word, denied to come to wisedomes Feast, because they would runne a whoring after their owne inuentions, and feed their sensuall carkases with the banquet and acates of their owne desires, and deuising.

At first I determined no method, or diuision, supposing that the spredding of instances & examples would haue afforded sufficient contentment to the Reader for the subiect in hand, which is the detection of sundry foule abuses in Popery, or if you will, in the liues of Priests and Friers: but finding the streame to come downe with a maine current, and that the stopping or damming it vp too close, would ouer-flow the fields, and spoile much good ground. I thought it better to cut out certaine riuolets, and passages, wherein the Riuer might runne betweene bounded Bankes, and so the lookers on receiue both pleasure and profit in the handsome keeping their channels. For which purpose if you runne about the streame, you shall finde out certaine deceitfull Nookes, Holes, Creekes, and dangerous Flats or Shelues. First, of lying Miracles: Secondly, coozening Deuices. Thirdly, Whoredome. Fourthly, Epicurisme. Fiftly, Thefts and Robberies. Sixtly, Murthers. Seuenthly, Blasphemies. Eighthly, grosse Ignorance. Ninthly, Beastlines. Tenthly, Fooleries & Absurdities. Eleuenthly, Impieties: and 12. Simony. Of all which in order, or as orderly as I can, not that I place [Page] them in their seates of precedencie, or tye them to any coherence of depending one vpon another; but to shew you with what palpable grosenesse they proceeded to ouerthrow True Religion, and iustified themselues in the world, to countenance their wickednesse, though they were neuer so foule delinquents.

I leaue to dispute of their Doctrines, Schoole-questions, fundamentall Controuersies, Church-Ceremonies, the Popes Supremacie, and many other tedious disceptations, which haue clogged vs with heauy burthens, and filled Libraries with thousands of Volumes, and onely at this time with Elias gather vp my cloathes for a cursorie iourney, and take my staffe in my hand, to goe the more speedier forward, and as I confesse, I must passe ouer much ground vnseene, and vnmarked: So I beseech you (gentle Reader) censure mee in the same manner, and excuse my not fully satisfying of you, by reason of the hastinesse of my iourney, and the small time I allot my selfe for the dispatch of my businesse: onely herein I dare be confident, there is not a step I make, but I haue warrant for my footing; nor Story I relate, but is extracted out of the bookes of their owne Magazines, and Authoritie of their former Writers. And so I conclude this Preface with the Poet:

Qui legis Oedipodem, caligantem (que) Thiestem,

Martial. l. 13. Epigram.

Calchidas & Scyllas, quid nisi monstra legis?

Quid te vana iuuant miserae ludibria Chartae?

Hoc lege, quod possis dicere iure, meum est.

Concerning their Miracles: If euer Iris was Thaumantis 1. Lying Miracles. [Page] Filia, the Daughter of Wonder: I will bee bold to say, hee that writ their Golden Legend, was the father of Lyes; but because there are so many bookes, and so many Discoueries concerning their ridiculous Stories; insomuch that the Papists themselues haue been ashamed of such palpable grosenesse, and ridiculous absurditie, I will insist the lesser on this point, and so leaue you to the liues of their Saints, Costerus, Doctor Sheldon, the Story of Saint Patrick: the old Chronicle of Clayton, and many other Authors: yet some Collections will not be amisse; and so you shall haue these few at this time.

Dionysius Areopagita afterward canonized, tooke vp his head, when it was strooke off, and carried it two mile in his hand: hee is recorded for a blessed Martyr, and many miracles done by him.

Saint Dunstane playing the Goldsmith, as he was at worke, took the Diuel by the Nose with a paire of Pincers, and made him roare out-right.

Saint Bernard turned Oken Leaues, into Loaues, by changing the Letter, and was wafted ouer the Sea vpon a stone.

One hundred and fifty of Ioseph of Arimatheas company sailed ouer a passage vpon his sonnes Shirt; as Frier Herneus did vpon his Mantle: and Saint Francis, between Naples and Messina vpon a Cloake, hauing no money to pay the Ferry-boat.

Saint Nicholas fasted Wednesdayes and Fridayes, when hee was an infant in the Cradle, and would not sucke.

Saint Christopher pitched his Staffe into the ground, [Page] and it budded: at the sight whereof, 8000. Pagans became Christians.

Bishop Trian hauing kill'd his Cow and his Calfe to entertaine Saint Patrick, was so pleasing to the Holy Man, that he restored them againe, and so they were found the next day feeding in the Meddow.

A certaine Thiefe hauing stolne a sheepe from a poore man, which he not onely denied, but threatned his Accuser for slandering him, was made to confesse the theft: For S. Patrick pittying the other, caused the sheepe to bleat in the Theeues belly.

Saint Briuius being but a Boy, saw the Diuel behinde the Altar, writing the peoples faults in Parchment, and when by reason of the multitude of sinnes committed, he wanted Parchment, hee stretcht it out with his teeth, till pulling too hard, he knockt his head against the wall: Which when Saint Martin perceiued, hee came to him, and made him blot out whatsoeuer hee had written.

The Kings Daughter of Silena loued Saint George so well, that for his sake shee cast her Girdle about the Dragons necke, and led him about like a Spaniell: but afterward she broke loose, and Saint George was compelled to kill her.

Saint George beeing cast into a Caldron of boiling Lead, by making the signe of the Crosse, escaped vn. hurt, &c.

Saint Crispina spake when her tongue was cut out.

Saint Margaret was deuoured of a Dragon, and swallowed vp, but remembring her selfe, she made the signe of the Crosse, and the Dragon burst in pieces, and so she was deliuered.

[Page] Two Nunnes sate talking from Christmas Eue to Midsommer, with a child sitting on a Cushion betweene them, in a corner of the Cloister, till a Shepheard comming by, saw the child, and told the Abbesse, who had searched long for these Sisters: but at last finding them, she asked for the child: they denied they saw any: but that they were talking of the Natiuitie of Christ. Then the Lady told them how long they had sate, when they verily thought it had been but one day, which was Christmas.

A Taper on Saint Xauiers tombe burnt full three weekes day and night without consuming: For at first it was but a cubit long, and so continued all the while.

Saint Katherine ouercame fifty Philosophers, and conuerted the Empresse and the Generall of the Emperours Armie: yea, she broke a wheele with her prayers, that with turning kill'd foure hundred Pagans: infinit impossibilities are written of her.

Bernacus yoaked Harts together; and tamed many Monsters.

Saint Brandon sailed into Paradise, and brought the blessed tidings of the ioyes thereof.

A Crucifix of Wood re-saluted Burtismen a Monke of Durrham.

The blessed Virgins house was transported ouer the Seas: first, into Dalmatia, then, into Italy, and last of all to Loretto.

These are the lying Miracles of Popish Prelates, which I haue recited, because they are not common, nor, as I take it, incerted in their Legend, but alledged by substantiall Authors, to countenance the Religion: [Page] but for these, and the whole Catalogue of the rest in their notorious fables, you shall finde, that one of the grieuances of Germany, when the Emperour condiscended to the reformation of Religion, was, that the Friers seduced them with lyes, and wrought vpon the weakenesse of ignorant men, and superstitious women.

Concerning coozening deuices; Are not yet men liuing, Coozening deuices. that can remember the knauerie of Priests to make the Roodes and Images of the Churches in England in the dayes of Queene Mary, to goggle with their eyes, and shake their hands: yea, with Wiers to bend the whole body, and many times to speake as they doe in Puppet playes, and all to get money, and deceiue the ignorant people?

Was not a Priest punished in the latter end of Henry the 8. for pricking his finger, and be-bleeding the Corporas, making the people beleeue the Host had done it, & that there was a very child seen in the singing cake?

Were not all our tales of Fairies, Goblins, Robingood-fellow, walking Spirits, the knaueries of Priers and Priests, who for belly-cheere, and wanton Wenches, came to houses by night, and swept the roomes, yea, gossiped with the crafty lasciuious houswiues?

Is not the tale of Saint Bernard worth the reciting, that comming into a Church to performe his deuotion, perceiued how knauishly the Priests had dealt with the Image of our Lady, to bid him good morrow, Bernard? whereupon to exprobrate their folly, and craftie conueyance, hee answered the Image in this sporting manner; Peace, Madam, it is not lawfull for women to speake in the Church.

[Page] At Strasborough a certaine superstitious old Woman resorted much to our Lady with sufficient offertories: which when the Priests perceiued, to countenance her Deuotion, they caused the child to speake & thanke her in our Ladies armes, which made the woman looke strangely, and speake some-what angerly. For shee presently replyed: Peace yong Gentleman, I haue nothing to doe with you, let mee heare what my good Lady your Mother sayes.

A Taylor of Florence, worshipping Saint Iohn in the Church of Saint Michael Barteldi, kneeling downe, beganne in this manner, O glorious and blessed Saint Iohn, tell me, I pray thee, whether my Wife haue played false, and what shall become of my sonne. Which the Priests and Clarke hearing, lying in wait for such purposes, either to make sport, or to raise a further profit, made Saint Iohn thus reply: My deare sonne, goe in peace, and to morrow thou shalt receiue an answere. The Taylor, I hope, mist not his houre, nor forgot his offertorie: So he made his Petition, & the Image answered: Thy Wife hath made thee Cuckold, and thy son shall be hang'd. At which the fellow was so amazed, that he went home enraged, and wanted little of desperately making away himselfe through the villany of the Priests. This tale did Piero de Cosmo de medici, relate himselfe to diuers of his guests.

A Priest of Louaine, called Anthony, hauing solemnly inuited some merry companions to dinner, knew not yet which way to intertaine them: For he had neither meat nor money: at last stepping into a neighbours house, where he was very frequent, and finding the seruant [Page] absent, he took the pot from the fire, and carried it home vnder his gowne. Thus he not only supplyed his wants, but powring out the meat into some other dish, sent the pot handsomely made cleane, as a pawne to the owner, and borrowed money of it, hauing a Bill of sale for the receit. The good man in the meane while chasing and fretting for the losse of his dinner, and theft of his pot, knew not what to say, till the Maid assured him, there was none there but Sir Anthony: hee againe loth to accuse so reuerent a man, and indeed affraid of the danger, was more vexed then before, till the seruant looking on the pawne, told him, it was his owne pot: then out of all patience he accused the Priest before a Magistrate; but when Sir Anthony shewed the Bill of sale, it was turnd to a merriment, and so the theft was shuffled ouer.

The Iacobinas of Berne, and Franciscans of Orleance got most of their wealth by walking Spirits, and resorting by night to houses, as if Robin good-fellow had done the drudgerie to ease the seruants of their labour.

Frier Reynald of Siena, louing a mans Wife, and so resorting to the house, was ouer-taken on a sudden with the vnlookt for comming home of her Husband, and had scarce time to leape out of the bed, and carry his cloathes in his hand; the man knocking still, and the Wife making no great haste, some hurly-burly arose: where-vpon, the woman layes the child in the Friers place, and lets in her Husband, who angerly demanded, why she tarried so long? Oh, replyed shee, speaking so lowd, the Frier might heare her, our sonne [Page] had like to haue perished through a fit of the Collicke, so that I was fayne to send for Frier Reynald to pray for him, who bade me keepe him warme in the bed, and is himselfe with his Sexton at his deuotion in the Loft. With that, the Frier and his Companion came downe with a booke in his hand; and after solemne courtsey made, told the good man, the child had certain Worms in his Maw, and therefore hee must make a Statuae of Wax of his bignesse, and present it to Saint Ambrose.

The Curat of Ouziane, neere to Amboise, hauing long had the pleasure of his Hostesse, and bred a great deale of iealousie in her Husband, thought by a crafty tricke to remoue that humour, pretending to be gelt: wherevpon hee agrees with one Peier de Serpens, borne at Villantroies in Berry, for foure crownes to sport with him, and conceale the matter. Which when the Host vnderstood, hee promiseth him twice as much to performe the thing indeed. The Surgeon taking pitie of the man, and despighted at the Friers knauerie, bound him hand and foote, and while he looked the company should make Intercession for him, and so leaue him to his former libertie, the other whipt off his Stones: telling him plainely, his profession was no dallying profession: and so the Host seemed quieted, as being thus reuenged.

A woman in Orleans being in loue with a yong Scholler, who yet was not acquainted with her, [Page] knew no better way to discouer her affection, then by her Frier Confessor, desiring him to giue him good counsell, not to tempt her, nor sollicit her any more, especially not to come ouer the wall into her Orchard as he promised. The Frier ouer-taken with her simplicitie, aduised the yong man for the best, and to diuert his loue from her. The yong man againe knowing there was no such matter, and yet apprehensiue of a womans wit, admitted of his good instruction, but instructed himselfe how he nowmight enioy a Sweet-heart: but when the Frier vnderstood how he had been made a Bawd and Pandar for the businesse, hee thought to beat out one nayle with another, and so very knauishly threatned the discouerie, if hee might not share in the bargaine.

It is reported of Oliuer Mailard, that when hee saw the wickednesse and Villany of Priests and Friers, he wondred, that the Saints interred in the Church, did not rise and pull out the eyes of the Whore-masters, and Deceiuers.

Pontanus saith, that there were certaine Nunneries at Valencia, which by reason of the filthinesse of Friers, who played the very Bawdes and Pandars to get mony, became loathsome Stewes, and intertained yong Gentlemen, as in Brothell houses, but all vnder colour of deuotion. When any of the Priests knauerie was discouered, there were excuses enough ready to desend them; yea, when they were found kissing of a woman; the answer was, You must suppose he did it to print a blessing on her lips.

[Page] What should I name the great abuses of Induigences, and Pardons, and all for money? wherein there were many tricks, and counterfet deuices.

Certaine cheating Friers hauing pawned their Relicks in a Tauerne, and wanting money to redeeme them, shewed the people a firebrand, and made them beleeue it was part of the fire, which broyled Saint Lawrence: wherevpon according to the ignorance of those times, many gaue them money, which they spent in all vnthriftinesse.

A Lady sent to pleasure a yong Cardinall, according to a certaine composition betweene him and her Husband, seemed at first very coy, and for all the basenesse of her Husband, would by no meanes consent to his pleasure, till at last, by forcible perswasions, faire intreatie, extraordinarie promises, the handsomnesse of his person, and the greatnesse of his estate, shee condiscended vnto him, and seemed well pleased in the alteration: where-vpon shee returnes to her Husband vvith the money, and told him plainely, shee vvas bought and sold, and therfore would returne, and forsake him for euer.

And thus much of their coozening and deuices: wherein I pray you take onely this notice, that I meane to giue you but a taste of euery one of the diuisions. For if I should set a Banquet before you, or a Feast to feed you, you would rather surfet, then be satisfied; the dishes are so many wherewith I could furnish the Table, and of that [Page] varietie, that you might rather glut and gorge your selues, then content nature with a temperate dyet. Againe, whereas it may be obiected, these were the times of old, there is now great reformation since these enormities were looked into: I answere plainely and directly; the same superstition remaines at this houre, and the Priests doe so preuaile with coozening deceit, and farrefetcht deuices, that in Spaine this present yeere 1622. the doctrine of the conception of our Lady vvithout sinne, and assumption into Heauen, is newly divulged and ratified, and the contrary opinion reputed Heresie, and the repugners hunted, and hissed at in euery Towne and Citie.

3. Concerning their Whoredome; or if you will haue the cleanlier terme, Fornication; Who knowes not, that there is a common allowance of Stewes (more then a conueniencie) vnder all the Catholike gouernment, for which the women doe allow an annuall entrado into the Popes Exchequer, or to the seuerall States where they liue?

In the first Councell of Toledo, in the raigne of Arcadius and Honorius, it was agreed, that the Clergie liuing without Wiues, should haue Concubines.

In the Patents of Abbots, in the Realme of England, this clause was incerted: Licitum erit Domino Abbati, semel in mense habere mulierem, ad purgandas renes; yea, in those dayes it was counted good policy to haue a Wife, Daughter, or [Page] Neece, a companion of a Cardinall, or Bishop, to be-friend the kinred in matters of complaint, or in tryals of Law.

A Gentle-woman taken in Adulterie, and so diuorced, desired for her penance to be detruded into a Monasterie, alledging this reason to her inward friends, that in stead of punishment, shee should bee sure to haue there the greater pleasure.

When souldiers entred into any towne to be lodged, or quartered, the first thing they did, was to hunt after Priests Lemans; and search euery corner for their Whores. And thus much for the generall: Now to particulars.

A Franciscan Frier lodging in the house of a Gentleman of Perigot, found the meanes to lye with his Wife vpon her Purification, as vnderstanding by confession his resolution. So hee entred the Chamber first, and when hee had taken his pleasure, departed out of the house, excusing his haste to the Porter, by speciall businesse. After he was departed, comes the Gentleman indeed, and found by his Wiues speech, that some body had wronged him: which so amazed him, that he amazed her by saying, he was abused. Shee with teares assured him, that none was in the house but the Frier, and her Brother: which was no sooner spoken, but vp hee gets, and to the Porter hee comes, and there vnderstands, how the Frier was departed. After him he followes, but not ouertaking him, hee returnes home againe. In his absence, [Page] the Wife enraged to bee so deflowred, hangs her selfe, and in the mischance ouerthrew a little child dead to the ground: the noise rais'd the house, and at last comes the brother, and finding his Sister hangd, supposing her Husband had done it, in some fit of iealousie, out of doores he flings, and meetes him returning home; in vvhich moode hee sets vpon him with Villaine, and defiance; and so they wound one another to death.

The Franciscans of Strasborough, before they were expelled, accustomed to steale away mens Wiues, and keepe them cloystered like yong Nouices, cutting their hayre, and charming them with feare of death; till at last a Butchers Wife was sent in the same habit with the Cater to buy meate of her Husband; who eying her very narrowly, as hauing seene the face before, could not be restrained, but layd hands vpon her, and so after great adoe, all was discouered, & the Friers banished.

Two Franciscans hauing no money to pay the Ferry, rauished the Woman that carried them, and so pleased her.

A Franciscan in Perigot found the meane, by obscuring himselfe in the bride-chamber, to lye with a Bride, before her Husband came to her, and escaped, for all that the houshold could doe, when they heard of it.

Another Franciscan by Lyons, married his brother Frier, in the habit of a Scholler, to a Widdowes [Page] Daughter of great riches and account, making them beleeue, hee was an heire to great reuenues, and sent to Lyons, as it were vnder his tutelage: but at last the Mother and Daughter comming to heare Masse, (as much deuoted to this Order) espied her Husband answering the Priest in his Friers weed, which for the time they concealed, till they came home, and at night, as his custome was, he likewise kept his houres: but being in bed, the mother comes in, and layed hold of his hands, while his Daughter pull'd off his Cap, and discouered her shauen crowne, and so hee was apprehended, and sent to the Magistrate.

There are more Stories of the Franciscans, then of any other Order, & they were euermore played vpon, because they pretended more holines, and sanctitie of life. They builded their Houses and Cels very neere the Nunneries; insomuch that many merrily said, Heere were the Barnes, and there were the Threshers.

It is reported, that when Henry the second was King of France, and wanted a great summe of money, a certaine Lord wisht him to sell the Friers beds; and when the King demanded, where they then should lye; he presently replyde, With the Nunnes. But, quoth the King, there are more Monkes a great deale then Nunnes. Why, said the other, one Nunne may very well haue fiue or sixe Monkes.

Two or three Curats betweene Daulphine and [Page] Sauoy, perswaded the women to faine themselues mad, that while their husbands went on Pilgrimage to recouer their health, the Priests might come and lye with them.

A Frier minorite of Sicilia, falling in loue with the young Wife of old Agatha the Physician, taught her a tricke to faine her selfe pained with the disease of the Mother: For which the Frier must be sent for, and bring in the Relikes of Saint Bernardine. Which hee did, commanding all the company in the Chamber to auoid; and so hee went to bed to the Physicians Wife, while his companion lay with the Maid. But ere all vvas done, home comes the Old man, and found the Friers breeches vnder his Wiues pillow, which she confessed, as a part of the Relicks, there to remaine, for feare of a relapse. Whereupon the Maid went to the Friers, to tell what had chanced: who camedowne merrily with all the other ceremonies of the cure, and so put his breeches together with the other Reliques.

The old Tale of the Abbesse in Lombardy is remembred to this day; who hearing that one of her Nunnes was in labour, came in all haste to chide her; but belike shee was puzzled in the darke: for in stead of her Vaile, she had put on a Monkes Breeches, that lay with her the same night: so comming to the Nunne, shee began to reuile her, who forall herpaine, soberly answered, Good Madam mend your plaister, and all shall bee well inough, I warrant you. This Tale [Page] is seconded by many other Stories in mine Author.

Pogius the Florentine reports of an Hermite at Padoa, called Anfimirius, in the time of Francis the 7. Duke, who was accused for intising the yong and handsome women to his lust and pleasure. Wherevpon the Dukes Secretarie was very busie to examine him, hoping hee would name some, at whose husbands hee might make sport, and laughter. In which iollitie, hee vrgeth him againe and againe to set down the women. Why then, quoth the Hermite, and you bee so hastie, write downe your owne Wife first. I hope you may imagine hee was amazed; the Duke smiled, and the whole company stood silent, for feare their turne should be next.

A Priest at Paris, after Shrift vvent no further then the Pew he sate in, to satisfie his lust.

A Curate neere Vienne in Daulphine, vvent behinde the high Altar.

A woman taken in Adulterie with a Priest, was accused and examined; but because shee could not deny the fact, the Priest was brought before the Bishop, who prescribed him this penance, not to come in three months within a Church. Whē the man, who was thus abused, vnderstood of so small a punishment, he lies in wait for him, and cruelly beates him; so that hee is brought before his Iudge to receiue punishment: who awarded him not to come into a Tauern in 3. moneths. At which the Bishop seemed much offended, till the [Page] Iudge answered: My Lord, considering the first abuse, I hope it is as great a punishment for him not to visit a Tauerne, as penance for the Priest not to trouble a Church.

In a Village neere Corguac, called Cherues, a Maid was got with child by her owne Brother, which she discouered to a Priest, and he perswaded the people impragnatam à spiritu: But when so great an imposture came to the eares of the Earle of Angolesme, father to Francis the first, he quickly found out the deceit, and so they vvere both burnt, and the Priest suspended.

To conclude this Section, I will be bold with the Records of the time of Henry the eight in our owne Countrey, concerning the Visitation of Monasteries, Couents, Collegiat Churches, and other religious Houses, out of which these particulars are extracted, that in the Monasterie of Battell, or Bete, in the Diocesse of Chichester, these So domites were discouered: Iohn Abbot: Richard Salchurst: Thomas Cuthert: William March: Iohn Hasting: Gregory Champion: Clement West field: Iohn-Crosse: Thomas Crambrooke: Thomas Bayl: Iohn Hamfield: Iohn Ierom: Clement Grigg: Rich. Toucy, and Iohn Austine.

In the Church of Canterbury among the Monks of Saint Bennet, Richard Godmershem: William Leichfield: Christopher Iames: Iohn Goldingston: Nicholas Clement: William Causton: Iohn Ambrose: Tho. Chichester: Iohn Champion; and Roger Barram. And in the Monasterie of Saint Austine: Tho. Barram, [Page] all these were found Sodomites, and punished accordingly.

To name other places, and other commissions of whoredome and fornication, were infinit; but so it was, and will be in all Nations, where impuritie and superstition ouercomes true zeale and deuotion: yet because there were certaine religious men that did obserue state in their impiety, and thought scorne to goe to common Brothels, or prostituted Whores, but kept women by the name of sequestration, and so liued more glorious, then the rest of poorer Priests; I will also name you some of them, as among the Monkes of Saint Bennet, Christopher Iames had the command and vse of three married women: William, Abbot of Bristow had foure Whores. In Windsor Castle, Nich: Whyden, Priest, had but foure. George Witborne had fiue: Richard Hunn fiue. Robert Danison, sixe: Richard Prior of Maiden-bedly, fiue.

In the Monasterie of Shulberd, in the Diocesse of Chichester: George Walden, Prior, had seuen. Iohn Standney, seuen. Nicholas Duke, fiue. In the Monasterie of Bath, Richard Lincombe had seuen. In the Cathedrall Church of Chichester, Iohn Hill had onely thirteene. Iohn White Prior of Bermonsdy had twenty. Now if there were foure hundred Couents of Monkes, and Nunnes, and two hundred of Begging Friers, and a suruey taken of all the delinquents in this kinde, O iudge; for Gods sake iudge; how many Whores, and Bastards of Priests, and Friers might bee in England [Page] in those dayes, and then, if according to the Poet,—sic paruis componere megna solebam: wee could step into France, Italy, Spaine, Germany, and other Countries, where the Clergy bare the sway, and gaue the example, and so pull out the dust and rubbish of their vnswept corners: Oh what a deale of filth, and a dunghill of noysomenesse, would arise, and what a mountaine of sinne would this sinne make! As for the distinction of time, I will be bold to say, It is as ill now, as euer it was in any time.

Concerning their Epicurisine and gurmandize: If euer the Prophet had cause in his time to 4. Epicurisine, and Drunkennesse. finde fault with the Priests, not onely for their hypocrisie, but their filthy and incontinent liues, giuen to gluttony and belly-cheere, which hee setteth out by the termes of Drunkennes and vomiting, I hope, the Monkes and Friers of Europe come behinde none of them all. Oh looke, for Gods sake, looke, and you shall finde in the Booke of God, many inuectiues against corrupt priests, couetous priests, winking priests, negligent priests, obstinate priests, idolatrous priests, rebellious priests, indifferent priests, gluttonous priests, blind priests, ignorant priests, dumbe priests, courtly priests, idle & vnconstant priests, bribed priests, hypocriticall priests, diuellish priests, deuouring priests, raging priests, incredulous priests, flattering priests, bloudy priests, murchering priests, luke-warme priests, madde priests. Oh looke for Gods sake, looke, and you [Page] shall finde in the Cloisters of Monasteries, in the Cels of Abbeys, in the Walkes of religious places, in the Courts of Princes, in the Castles of Lords, in the houses of Gentlemen, in the streets of Cities, in the Farmes of Countreymen, and in the Chambers of Widdowes, religious men of all these sorts, especially hunting after belly-cheere, and to fill their veines with fulnesse of blood, hot, and corrupted. Marke but the situation of their Monasteries and Houses! Are they not in the fattest grounds, and the plentiful fields of the Country? Doe they not feed on the choisest Lambes of the fold, and stretch out their limmes on beds of Iuory? Doe they not carowse in Gobblets and Chalices of Gold, and haue the purest Wines of the Vintage? With what delicate fruits are their Orchards stored? and vvith what walkes of pleasure are their Gardens contriued? Was it not a by-word in those dayes, A chuffing Abbot, A fiery-faced Abbot, A gorbellied Abbot?

Is there not at this houre bread made at Paris of the finest Wheat, called the Chapter bread? doe they not euery where feed on the daintiest Manchet? yea, those they call Mendicant Friers, eceiue no scraps, I hope, but whole Loaues, and the best prouision in an house.

Are not their Caters sent to the Markets to prouide the best meat, both Flesh, Fish, & Fowle; Pikes of fiue French crownes, Carps, Tenches, Barbels, and all of that sort at high rates? and must [Page] they not be sod and stewed in Wine, to please the palate, and heat the stomake? Are not their fasting dayes, dayes of banquets, sweet-meates: and confectionary stuffe, Cullises and Broths, Cawdles, and Panados? sweet and hot Waters? Perfumes and Incense? Are not their linnen of the best Diaper and Damaske? and the Vtensels of their house so farre from temperature, and moderation, that they exceed in sumptuousnesse, and brauerie?

There was a certaine Cardinall in Rome, that, to make demonstration of humilitie, had alwaies a net for his Table-Cloth: but preferred to the Papacy, he bade take away the Net; for he had that which he fish'd for.

When English Cromwell had a great suite to Clement the Pope, he acquainted himselfe with his custome, and dyet, and so inuented a dish of sauoury and pleasant gelly, which he brought in, in a fantasticall manner, with a true mans song, a thing much in vse in those dayes; and so vvhether his Holinesse were pleased with the sport, or delighted with the dainty, hee granted his request.

Pope Iulius accustomed to eate Porke and Peacocks flesh, would make long meales, and vvas a meere glutton.

Becket himselfe was accused for an Hereticke, as eating Capons on Saint Markes day, and feeding like an Epicure on prohibited times, so that he should haue beene attached, had not the Holy [Page] Man miraculously turn'd a Capon to a Carpe.

In the Legend of Cardinall Wolsey, it is obiected against him, that he ate stewed Capons in Lent, and sate at his Feasts as long as the King himselfe. I could name the rest, or at least many more: but these, I hope, shall suffice for the subiect in hand: and if any haue forgot the vsance of their owne Countrey, let them still demaund of the trauellers in other places, who haue frequented the Monasteries of Europe, and I hope they will confesse the truth without blushing.

5. Concerning their thefts and robberies: what was all their sellings of Indulgences & Pardons, 5. Thefts and Robberies. but the exhausting of the treasure of a whole Kingdome? Insomuch, that for such theeuish exaction, Luther and others rowled a stone, which neuer lest, till it turned the Popes Supremacie out of most Countries of Europe.

Was not the imposition of Peter-pence in England, amounting to the yeerely rent of a 100000. pound sterling, a meere theft? Did not women goe about (as they doe still in Ireland) with a cozening Priest, to howle ouer the graues of the dead, and mourne for the desunct, teaching their eyes to weepe, and their hearts to sob, and all for money?

Are not the Priests stil set on worke to incroach vpon the flexible nature of men and women, to perswade them to wilfull pouerty, that they might bee inriched vvith their gifts and Legacies, and haue their Monasteries augmented [Page] vvith their Lands and Reuenues?

Were not the Iesuites banished Venice, for cozening the Ladies and Gentlewomen of their Collanas, and Iewels, some of them worth two thousand pound sterling, being of great Orientall Pearle, and other rich precious stones.

What an infinit treasure did Cardinall Wolsey conuey out of this Realme, for the ransom of Pope Clement, and briberie of the Cardinals for his owne aduancement to the Papacie, and maintaining his ambition?

Is not that ridiculous tale worth the reciting, of the man that buried his Dogge, for which hee was accused, and brought before the Bishop? Which he answered in this manner; O my Lord, if you knew the wisedome of this Dogge, you would not condemne mee! For at his death hee bequeathed a Legacy to your Lordship of a hundred crownes, knowing your wants, and great occasions. By which excuse he was remitted, and the Bishop pacified. But was not this either manifest Atheisme, or plaine robbery.

Was and is not the Croysade a tricke of theeuerie, to make men beleeue, they must pay so much money, or be damned?

Did not a ghostly Father preach in the open Pulpit, that when any money was giuen for a soule departed, the soules in Purgatory hearing it tingle in the Bason, did laugh for ioy?

Was not this the very cause, that Christ did exprobate the Pharises for buying and selling in [Page] the Temple, saying plainely, this should bee a house of Prayer, but ye haue made it a den of theeues.

At Casall one finding three hundred Crownes, confessed the same to a Priest, who so terrified him with damnation, if it were not restored, that the silly fellow deliuered him the money to impart it backe againe to the owner (as he by coniuration would finde out) but hee deceiued him, and spent the same amongst Whores, and potcompanions.

A Curtizan in Venice lying very sicke, sent for a Frier to confesse her sinnes: and so opening a Casket, in which was our Ladies Psalter bound in Gold; the Frier peeping in, saw beside a 1000. Zhekinos lying by. For the time he said little, but afterward found a better time to purloyne the same away.

Was not the Hermit of the Valley of Monte Negro a iolly fellow, who with two Friers kept the passages in strange habits, and robbed all commers?

Did not certaine Priests frequent the Schollers lodgings at Sienna, and still as their exhibition came from their Parents, they would either steale some, or be the cause of vnnecessary expences: and when money failed, they would either haue bookes, or apparell?

At the garden of Simples in Padoa, a Gentleman of Poland hauing a rich Hat-band, was deceiued of it by a Frier, that came and lay by him, [Page] as hee was searching the ground for some new Hearbe to shew the Master.

I could name you a thousand of these Stories, both to proue their generall and particular thefts, some serious, some ridiculous, some indifferent. But these shall suffice at this instant, and I make no question, there is no Reader, or Searcher of Inuentories, but lights vpon many more: and although some with Licurgus law allow of theft, to make men the more wary and cautelous of their goods; and other-some excuse them, as men subiect to imperfections, or politicke Husbands, that may increase their estates by thriuing deuices: Yet the true-hearted Christian wil confesse such theeueries, the branches of impietie; and if they condemne them in other men, will much more abhorre them in the Professors of Religion, and Priests of the Clergie.

6. Concerning their Murthers, and cruell and bloudy practises, either to compasse their owne 6. Murther, and bloudy cruelty. ends, or take reuenge of such as had offended them; I am thus fraighted with many Stories. But before I come to particulars, giue mee leaue to tell you, I could discouer many horrible and fearefull executions: many notorious and formidable massacres: many grieuous and sanguinarious persecutions, I could tell you, that the Priests perswaded silly women, that abortion was no sinne.

I could also adde, that in the gardens of Nunneries, was alwayes a tree or two of Sauine, [Page] which they say the Nunnes vsed to drinke steeped in Wine: now the property of Sauine is to destroy any thing condensed in the wombe, and so you may iudge of the cause: And so I come to the rest.

In the time of Maximilian the Emperour, a Franciscan Frier in Flanders, came one night into a Gentlemans house, and after he had murthered some seruants, tooke the Gentlewoman perforce, and dis-robed her of her apparell, putting a short garment on her, which hee brought with him, of purpose to steale her away to the Monastery, and so threatning her with death, if shee spake or discouered the matter, though shee met with her Husband, hurried her out of doores, riding with a long Pike staffe, and a short Dagger disguized.

But as he posted away in this manner, hee met with her husband indeed and his man. The Gentlewoman, as she was threatned and coniured, passed by, and durst not speake: and so the Frier followed as churlishly. The seruant had onely a glimpse of her, and knew her; yea, hee discouered the Frier also, telling his Master, what had hapned. But he by reason of the impossibilitie of the matter, as hee supposed, told him hee was a foole, or mad, and so would haue rid home without any more adoe: but the seruant would needs goe backe againe to take his better view. Which when the Frier perceiued, and apprehensiue, that his knauerie should be reuealed, he took the aduantage of the mans peering vnder her [Page] Vaile, & so with a violent stroke, feld him to the ground with his braines dasht out. The Gentleman seeing his man fall, returned in fury, and had the fortune to cloze with the Frier, and so struggling together, at last ouerthrew him; which when his Wife perceiued, she returned and assisted him, wounding the Frier with his owne Dagger. Thus was he taken, and afterward examined, and adiudged to dye: and so hee was publikely burnt.

The Lord Saint Iohn of Ligoures, cousin to the Marshall of Saint Andrewes, committed Incest with his wiues Mother, and had diuers children by her; yea, hee so loued her, or if you will, burned in Lust toward her, that he reuealed the same in confession to his ghostly father, who to pleasure the Lord, told him plainely he might kill his Wife, and so bee rid of her. This was dangerous and bloudy, and therevpon hee made a stay, till the Frier andaciously told him, he would be the executioner for his sake: and so the murther was committed by certaine Ruffians, but at last detected, for which the Frier was publikely executed.

A Priest of Fonsigney, called Don Iohn, vnder the dominion of Thiez, then Gouernour of Geneua, out of meere malice and heart-burning, boted out his brothers eyes: not so contented, hee brought him to Chambery, to a Saint called Saint Iuery, and then in great request; and as hee was passing ouer a Bridge, would haue throwne him [Page] into the Riuer: but missing of his purpose, by accesse of greater company, hee with certaine as wicked as himselfe, kill'd him in a Barne.

A Priest called Saint Iohn, came to Autuns Church in Paris, to visit the Curate of Saint Andrew des ars, who stood betweene him, and a Benefice: but not willing to tarry the time, and growing enraged to be so long disappointed, hee tooke an opportunitie, and set vpon him and his man, and with his companions kill'd them both: For which he was afterward executed.

In an Inne at Soysons, the good mans Daughter of the house had a child vnlawfully, which was brought vp in the house to his great griefe; and therefore he could neuer endure it, because it still put him in minde of her shame. At last hee contriued to put her to a Nunnery with a certaine piece of money: and so hee bargained with a Priest called Hector, a Bakers sonne of Moyen. But this Varlet tooke the child, and without any more adoe cut her throat, throwing the body into a heape of Nettles. But see the goodnesse of God! hard by, was a Sexton making a graue in a Churchyard, to whom he proffered money to bury the body: but he suspitious of the murther, reuealed all he knew to the Magistrate. And so the parties were examined, and the murther found out.

A Priest of Orleans iealous of a Whore which he kept, and loth to bee further tormented, carried her to a Tauerne, vnder colour of kindnesse, [Page] and there beginning cause of displeasure, at last cut her throat.

The Duke of Brabant, and Earle of Gelderland, raised warre for the Duke-dome of Limbourg, in which the Bishop of Cullen as assistant to the Earle, was taken prisoner, and kept seuen yeere, till all conditions were accomplished. Thus was he in the custody of the Earle of Mount in Heinalt, whom hee could not corrupt for his escape with any promise or gifts, which so inraged him, that in his heart he sware reuenge. At last hee is set at liberty, and all vnkindnesse seemed to bee forgotten; insomuch that the Bishop came to visit the Duke, & in his returne intreated the Earle to accompany him to Tuits, a towne standing ouer against Cullen; which he did, suspecting no harme: but the Bishop had liued in Ambuscado for him, and not onely imprisoned him, but euery hot day vsed him in this maner: he script him naked, and most cruelly put him into an iron Cage, all nointed ouer with honey, and so set him in the Sunne, where Flyes, Hornets, Wasps, and Bees, tormented the poore Earle to death.

Two Canons of Cullen vpon displeasure against Herman Grin, and yet dissembling their malice, inuited him to dinner; and in stead of friendly fare, thrust him into a roome, where was kept a hungry Lyon: but the valiant man winding his Cloake about his arme, drew his Rapier, & kill'd the Beast, and so scaped the reuenge of these wicked priests.

[Page] Henry, Archbishop of Cullen, most cruelly and barbarously brake the armes and legges of Earle Frederick; and when hee had done, cast the carkasse to the Crowes.

In the time of Otho the Emperour, there was a cruell Bishop of Mentz, called Hatto, who hated the poore, and said they were worse then Vermine, and Rats, and fit for nothing but to bee burnt: wherevpon in a time of Dearth hee filled a barne full of them, and set it on fire, consuming them to cynders: For which, the iudgement of God fell vpon him, and he was deuoured of Rats aliue. For when he fled from all places, they following him in great multitudes, he went into a tower in the midst of the Rhine, called the Rats-Tower for euer after, whither the Rats swamme after him; but it lay not in the strength or policy of man to deliuer him: For there they deuoured him aliue.

A Iacobine poisoned Henry the 7. Emperour, with his breaden god.

Iohn de Roma, a Iacobine Frier, one of the holy house of Spaine, so persecuted the Christians of Merindol and Gabriere, that hee filled bootes with hot grease, and drew them on their legges, both to draw them to confession, and make them confesse where their money was.

A Monke called Heran, presuming of his merits, by reason of his holinesse, and austeritie of life, after fifty yeeres was perswaded by the Diuell to throw himselfe into a deepe Well, from [Page] whence preserued and taken out by miracle, hee could not bee perswaded, or remoued from any other opinion, but that it was an Angell appeared vnto him, to make him glorious to posteritie.

Philip the Emperour, and his Successor Otho, were both brought to their destruction by the practises of Innocent the third. And why may not I bring in heere, that King Iohn of England was poisoned by a Monke of Swinsted Abbey, seeing they themselues bring it in, and insert it in their Stories?

About the yeere 1513. Henry of Lutzenburg was poisoned in the Sacrament by a Dominican Frier, which Baptista Ignatius affirmes, and Sleidan recites the reason, from a motiue of Clement the fift, because hee grew too strong in Italy: but what followed: many Friers of that Order were slaine afterwards by the Souldiers.

Pope Innocent the fourth was charged with the poisoning of Frederick the Emperour, by meanes of Peter de Vinca: but escaping at that time, hee was afterward murthered by Manfrede, by the same Popes practise.

Ioane Queene of Naples was murthered by the priuity and consent of Vrbane the sixt:

Charles King of Naples, by the nefarious and bloudy counsell of Clement the fourth, caused Conradinus and Frederick Duke of Austria to be put to death, which at last cost the young Prince his life: and, so murther vpon murther followed, [Page] and the Popes themselues were defamed for such hatefull mischiefe and treasons.

Sixtus the fourth, was the principall contriuer of that treason, whereby Iulian de Medices was slaine, and his brother Laurence hurt in the Church of Reparata at Florence, at the eleuation of the Sacrament. For Volateran saith, that the Pope knew of it, and countenanced the malefactors.

Alexander the sixt most inhumanely caused Gemes the Turkes brother to be impoysoned, being seduced and corrupted by the bribes of the Great Turke, and promises of more money.

Henry the third of France was most shamefully murthered by a Dominican Frier, called Iames Clement; and the fact not onely allowed of at Rome, but highly commended by the Pope.

The lamentable Story of that man of men Henry the fourth of France, is not yet forgotten, and whensoeuer it pleaseth God to spred abroad the carpet of reuenge, oh what foule soules peraduenture will appeare vnder faire faces!

The late Prince of Orange was first wounded by Iohn Iauregui, and afterward murthered by Baltasar Gerard, being both perswaded by Masse-Priests and Friers, that such a facinorous act must needs be meritorious.

I could also name Michael Reinion, Peter de Four, and Peter Pann, animated to kill Prince Maurice, all instructed by Priests and Iesuites, who are indeed the very Incendiaries of the [Page] Popes furnace, to set all Europe in combustion.

What should I trouble you further with their owne murthering one another for the Papacy, with the cruelties of the Consistorian Cardinals, and the exorbitant wickednesse, which streameth all ouer the Citie, and is more infectious to their soules, then the plague, which often happens in that place, to their bodies?

7. Concerning their Blasphemies, I meane not to trouble you much with their oathes, strange inuented 7. Their Blasphemies. oathes, forswearings, protestations, execrations, curses, equiuocations, or such like. For I haue other things to make you amazed withall, and such fearefull speeches hammered on the anuill of the Diuels shoppe, that I must needs say with the Poet, Horresco referens: Yet I will begin gently, and tell you, it was a Prouerb, a common Prouerbe in those times, Hee sweareth like an Abbot.

A certaine Priest at Rome, who had been angred by a Curtezan, burst out into an oath, and sware by Potta de la Virgine.

When the Monkes had no Wine, they vs'd to send to their Brethren, and say, Date nobis de oleo vestro, quia Lampades nostra extinguuntur.

A certaine Frier preaching of the Passion of Christ, acted his gesture in such a maner, that hee moued his auditorie to shed teares: which when he perceiued, he changed the accent of his voice, and cryed out, Weep not so greatly. For perhaps it is not true, which I told you.

[Page] A wicked Priest of Toures, rayling on the Hugonets, for putting their trust in Christ, durst aduenture to tell them, that for his part hee would beleeue the Pope before Christ.

Iulius the third, called Iohn de Maria de monte, exclaimed thus, that if God was so angry for the eating of an Apple; how great reason had he to be raged at the losse of his Peacock, which meat he loued so well?

Cardinall Bembus in a conference about their glory and wealth in the world, exclaimed with a smile: Oh what riches haue we gotten by this fable of Christ!

A popish Prelate rayling against Lutherans, said plainely, that sure Saint Peter at the first was a Lutherane. For out of the presumption of his faith, hee would needs come to Christ on the water, and might thereby haue beene drowned, if not saued miraculously.

Menot a Frenchman, and Barlet an Italian, said, that if Christ had not been crucified, the Uirgin Mary would haue performed it with her owne hands for the saluation of mankinde.

The Papists in generall confesse perfection in the rules of Monkes and Friers, and the Masse-priests of Trent doe make traditions equall to Scriptures, and they commonly deny Scriptures to be a perfect rule of life and doctrine.

The Turkes punish feuerely such as blaspheme Christ: but Papists, I meane, the Monkes and Friers teare him in pieces with their hands and [Page] mouthes. For such are thought to be most cleere of Heresie, that can sweare most wickedly, and blaspheme outragiously.

Though Papists professe Iesus Christ, &c. yet doe they teach that Dogs and Hogs doe eate his body, as oft as they eate the consecrated Host.

The Pope is called the soueraigne Lord of Purgatorie, and can deliuer soules from thence by Indulgences and Pardons.

The Turkes deny all manner of God-hood in man, yea, in their owne Prophet Mahomet; and verily beleeue, that Cosdras was vanquished by the Romanes, for calling himselfe a god: but the Popes not onely call themselues so, but haue decreed it hereticall to thinke otherwise.

I could loade you with examples: but these shall suffice. For I would not raise this mount too high, considering I determine but a kinde of hillocke, to ouer-looke the neighbour fields, and easie passages: onely I will adde hereunto how God hath been displeased with these men, euen as farre as desperate deaths and punishments: yet neither haue they repented, but dyed in their perfidious blasphemies; nor others taken warning, but continued in their malicious wickednesse.

The Chancelour of France cried out on his death-bed, Oh Cardinall, thou hast sent vs all to the diuell!

Bonanenture de Periere, author of that detestable booke, called Symbolum mundi, ran himselfe vpon his sword, and dyed most desperately: as Razis, [Page] and others in Switzerland threw themselues headlong from high Rocks, by reason of the blasphemies of Popes prelates.

The Chancelor and Legat du Prat made a faire Hospitall, of which Francis the first was wont to say, it was not halfe large enough to lodge so many poore people, as he had vndone: Hee dyed at Nantouillet of a strange disease; his stomake eaten thorow with Wormes: and while his Coffers were sealing vp, he roued, and said, See, what is gotten with seruing the King with soule and body!

Stephen Ponchier, Archbishop of Toures, labouring to erect a new Court against the Professors of True Religion, called the burning Chamber, was attached by a disease, named Le feu de dieu, beginning at his feet, and rising vp to his head: so that hee was constrained to cut off one legge and member after another, till he dyed.

Iohn Ruze a Chancelor of Parlament, and great blasphemer of God, and persecutor of the Protestants, had a burning disease in his priuities and stomake, which consumed him.

Claudius des asses, a great swearer and blasphemer, the same day hee had condemned a Protestant to be burnt, as he was in the act of filthines with one of his Chamber-Maids, the same day dyed of an Apoplexy.

Oh the lamentable deaths of our owne Clergy in England, rauing, and blaspheming God euen at the last gaspe (as they say) namely, the Bishop [Page] of Winchester, Cardinall Bewford, Cardinall Wolsey, Cardinall Poole, Gardner, Bonner, and diuers others.

Iohn Andrew a Stationer, and a Spie against Protestants, set on by the popish Clergy, died starke mad, and railing both against God and them.

Iohn Menier, Lord of Opidel, fell into a strangurie and burning disease, blaspheming his Creator, and crying out against the Clergy.

A Iacobine Frier, called De Roma, withdrawing himselfe to Auignion, determined to make merry with the spoiles of the Protestants of Prouence, where he was first robbed by his owne seruants, and then died in beggery of a strange disease.

Petrus Castellanus was once a professor of the Gospell, in the time of Francis the first, and so displeased the Sorbonists at Paris: afterwards he returned as they say, to the vomit, in the raigne of Henry the second: and thereupon was made the Bishop of Orleance: the reason is rendred, because the Protestants had no countenance nor honour. But what followed he fell into a strange disease: the one halfe of his body was as hot as fire, the other as cold as might be; which, ioyned with a bloudy flix, kill'd him at last: but before he died, all were amazed at his sorrow and extremitie.

8. Concerning their ignorance and doltishnesse. 7. Their Blasphemies. For the generall, it is well knowne, that many priests could scarce read Latine, much lesse [Page] vnderstand it, and knew not their Masse and Mattens, but by the great letters: yea when they were drunke, were often deceiued in the rules of the Pye; and would diuers times repeate one for another: insomuch that in England we had these phrases: Ignorant Sir Iohn: A very Dunse: a Queen Maries priest, and such like. But to make you sport, and giue you some examples:

It is a common tale of a pretty Boy, that set the Priests Barne on fire, and speaking to him in his owne Latine, all was burnt, because he vnderstood him not.

Pogius the Florentine hath a hundred examples of the Priests of his time, that knew no Latine, when they came to receiue Orders, they are called his facetiae: and indeed he sets downe the stories, meerely for iests and laughter.

There was an Italian Frier, that told the people, they were to celebrate that weeke the feast of Epiphany; but by his troth he knew not, whether it were Man or Woman.

When a certaine Priest read the Gospell of Christs feeding so many men with a fewe loaues and Fishes, he named 500. for 5000. at which the Clarke being discontented, stepped to him, and told him he was mistaken, it was 5000. Hold thy peace, replied the Priest, I pray God they beleeue this number.

There was a certaine Priest, that supposed dignus, was Latine to dine: for when he came to the Bishop to be preferred to a Benefice, the Bishop [Page] onely asked him, Es ne tu dignus? Hee replyed, that if it pleased his Lordship, hee would dine with his Gentlemen.

What should I name him, that could not tell the father of the foure sonnes of Aimon; or him, that knew not who begat Iaphet, for all they said, that Noah had three sonnes, Som, Ham, and Iaphet?

There was a Priest in Italy so absurdly ignorant, that when he came to baptize an Infant, he accustomed to say, In nomine Patria, & filia, & spiritua Sancta.

Of diuers Priests the relation is thus: One, in stead of euertit domum, said euerit domum: Another, for demissus per portam, demissus per sportam. A third englished Haereticum deuita, put an Hereticke to death; and a fourth, Inuenimus Messiam, we haue found the Masse.

A Curate of Artois suing his Parishioners for not pauing the Church, alledged the Prophet Ieremy for his action—Paueant illi, & non paueā ego.

A profound Clerke, being vrged with certaine lawes, called Clementina and Nouella, was very angry, that they obiected to him the testimonie of Whores and Harlots.

Prat the Chancelor, interpreting Henry the 8. Letter to Francis the French King, englished Mitto tibi duodecim Molossos; so many Mules, in stead of Mastiues.

Hugo Carensis wil not haue Diabolus, a slanderer, but to eat vp one at two morsels, body and soule.

[Page] In the conference holden at Poyssi, a Priest called Demochares, pleading for Images, was so ignorant, that hee had no other thing to alledge, but the painted windowes of Saint Denis. True, answered the Minister, your argument is made of glasse.

The Papists commend the Colliers faith, that could answere the Diuell nothing, but that he beleeued, as the Church beleeueth, although hee knew not what that beliefe was. Wherevpon Linwood and others say; It is sufficient to beleeue the Articles of the Creed, and no more.

Dante saith, that the Friers preach their owne inuentions, and tell idle tales without edification: and Cornelius Agrippa condemneth their ignorance, as preaching meere toyes, and humane deuices, as not vnderstanding any other.

Alfonsus à Castro saith, that diuers Popes were vtterly vnlearn'd. For one of them, in stead of fiat, said fiatur.

Gregory the sixt, according to Laziardus, vnderstood not the Masse. Pope Zachary condemned Virgilius, a Bishop of Germany, as an Hereticke, for saying there were Antipodes: and Paul the second could not endure the name of Academie, as an enemy to all learning.

Iohn Peckam, in the Provinciall constitution, thinketh it sufficient for Priests once in a quarter of a yeere to expound the Articles of the Creed, ten Commandements, the two commandements of the Gospell, the seuen workes of Mercy, the [Page] seuen deadly sinnes: the seuen Vertues: the seuen Sacraments, and that without curiositie.

Durandus teacheth vs, that the two points of a Bishops Myter, signifieth the Old and New Testament: but Loies Mersilius, an Augustine Frier saith, that the two strops of the Myter that hang on the Bishops backe, doe signifie, that hee neither vnderstood the Old nor New Testament.

Alnarus Pelagius complaineth, that the Bishops of Spaine committed thousands of soules to their kinsmen priests, that had no learning. And the Germanes of late told Adrian the sixt; that vnlearned Idiots, vnfit, vile, and ridiculous fellowes were made Priests.

The Monkes and Friers at this houre can scarce read their canonicall houres. For in the Monasterie of Fulda, the Monkes accused Rabanus Manrus for being learned, and studying the Scriptures, and neglecting their temporalities: but of late, lest children should mocke the popish priests, that cannnot read their Masse with true accents, euery word in common Missals is accented: and yet they misse every day.

9. Concerning their Beastlinesse, both in ribaldry and other [...] actions, I will insist the 9. Their Beastlinesse lesse, because the [...] are filthy, and can no way delight either chaste eares, nor a ciuill auditorie yet to keepe correspondency with my diuision, something must be spoken befitting this discourse, and agreeable to the Section.

In other places as well as there, when women [Page] came to confession, the Friers and Priests would demand of them, whether they were Sodomites or no? many times putting them in mind of that, which they vnderstood not, and causing a filthinesse to bee practised, which before they knew.

You shall reade in the life of Iuniperus, whom Saint Francis held for an honest man, that hee commonly vsed to defile his bed, by rauening in of hotch-pot dyet; as seething Cabages, Roots, Bacon, Beefe, Flesh, Veale, Pidgeons, and all together, without either scumming the pot, or cleanely dressing.

They tell it for a iest, and yet not to bee denied, that the Monke Ruffinus droue away the Diuell, by threatening to vntrusse a point in his throat.

In the life of Saint Dominick, a certaine man was possessed with Diuels: whereupon the Saint bound about his necke certaine Relicks, whereof some of them were no better then shitten clouts at the least, whose perfume the Diuels could not abide, and therefore cryed out they would depart: but the holy Man would not beleeue them, till the Relicks were sureties for them. As hee also preached, the women were amazed, and cryed out, that if hee said true, they had serued a very strange Master; he bade them be quiet, and they should see what Master they had serued. Wherevpon enters in among them an vgly Cat, with flaming eyes, shewing his posteriors vnto them, which were more filthy then in other Beasts: At last he leapes into the Belfry, and left [Page] such a stinke behinde him, that had almost choaked them all.

In the legend of S. Dominick, a Nun called Mary, had a sore thigh, for which she praied to S. Dominick, as daring not to pray to God: Who pittying her, came to her when shee was asleepe, and anointed the place.

Pope Felix the eighth after S. Gregory, built a Church in the honour of S. Cosmas, and S. Damias, wherein one had his thigh almost rotted off with a canker: but these Saints came with Salues and Ointments, yea tooke very excrements to cure the fellow: but when they sawe they could doe no good, they cut off a legge of an Aethiopian newly buried, and put it to the man, and so cured him.

At Lodone in Gascoine, the Mouse that had eaten their bready god, was canonized, and called the holy Mouse.

The famous Fransciscan de cornibus; died of the Neapolitan disease: yet, when the buttons and pimples brake foorth, and made him looke fiery red, they reported he became a Seraphin; yea, when a Gentlewoman died of the stinke, by kissing of his feet, it rather confirmed their opinion, then gaue them eyes to looke into the villanie.

When a certaine Cardinall made report; that there was a Woman possessed by a Diuell, who could not be coniured: No, quoth Lon the publick Notarie, giue her but a glister of holy-water, and the Diuell will be gone, I warrant you.

[Page] It is written in the life of Pope Sixtus the 4. that hee granted libertie to the whole familie of the Cardinall of, S. Luce, to vse carnall cōpany with the male sex, during the three hottest Moneths: and Pope Alexander the 6. permitted Peter Mendozze, a Spaniard, and Cardinall of Valentia, to make a Ganimede of his bastard sonne, the Marquesse of Zannet. But of this no more.

10. Concerning their Fooleries, & Absurdities, 10. Their fooleries. I know not werhe to begin, nor once beginning, how to make an end: For there are so many remarkable things of this kinde, that I stand amazed at the blindnesse of former times, that could not discouer such fopperies and abuses; and wonder at their superstitious ignorance, which would not suffer them to be led into the fairer fields of knowledge: But to the purpose.

A Franciscan, putting on a short garment, and leauing off his breeches of purpose, vsed such emphaticall speeches and gestures to the people which stood before him, about the passion of Christ on a good Friday, that they fell a weeping: but such as were behinde, seeing his naked buttocks, as he bowed himselfe, fell also a laughing, he proued so ridiculous in the action.

Robert Liciencis, another Franciscan, could cause either sorrow, or laughter, by the enforcement of his words, and manner of his gesture: yea he had a tricke to winne wagers with his potcompanions of eithers enforcement.

A Frier hauing a Sweet-hart, who loued him [Page] extraordinarily, but could not endure his habit, he took occasion one day to preach of the warres against the Turk: and comming to the point of choosing a Generall, or Captaine, hee threw off the gowne, and preached in the habit of a Souldier, which became him so well, that his Sweet-heart seeing him, was much delighted with his presence. And when for this and other fooleries hee was sent for before the Cardinals, hee answered them very merrily and reuerently, that he did it to please his Loue, not in any contempt of his Order, or the Catholike Religion.

A certaine Curate complained to his Parishioners in this sort; Alas, what would you haue me doe, O my Parishioners? You bring me no offerings, and I see none of you dye; How shall I liue then, thinke ye?

The Franciscans of Enreux counterfetted a Ghost, or a Spirit, to procure money; and a yong Franciscan Nouice, called Harecourt, at Orleans, counterfetted the ghost of the Prouost Marshals Wife, because he gave but sixe crownes to the Franciscans.

At Triers in Germany, in the Abbey of Saint Simon, Saint Iosephs pantophles haue beene in request a long time: and in Aix they shewed his Breeches, with the Virgin Maries Smocke: nay, there is not so much as the tayle of the Asse, on which our Sauiour rode, but it is at Genoa accounted for a Relicke: and in the Countrey of Loraine the holy Hay found in the Cratch, where [Page] our Sauiour was laid, is very famous.

At the Blacke-Friers in Arles, at Vigand in Languedock, and at Florence, the stones are shewed that kill'd Saint Steuen: with the arrowes wherewith Saint Sebastian was wounded.

When Nicodemus tooke our Sauiour downe from the Crosse, he gathered some of his bloud, and put it in one of the fingers of his Gloue, by which he wrought many miracles, & for which he was persecuted by the Iewes: so that hee was glad to bee rid of it, and tooke a piece of Parchment, writing therein all his miracles, and what the bloud was, rowling it together, and inclosing it in the beake of a Bird, and so tying it hard, cast it into the Sea: but after 1200. yeeres, the waues draue it into Normandy, among certaine shrubs, where a Duke found it, and built the Abbey of Beck in the place: For hunting of a Stagge, and losing him and the dogges, they were all found kneeling before the Birds bill: which when it was searched, discouered the secret, and the miracle wrought the Duke to Deuotion; and as I said, made him build a glorious Abbey:—O manifesta phraenesis!

What say you to Christs bloud kept in Vyals, gathered from vnder the Crosse by his Mother? The teares of Christ? the Swaddling bands of Christ? the Milke of the Virgin Mary? yea, the very breath of Christ, and the hornes of Moses?

What thinke you of the seuerall Saints and their Offices? Saint Genniesne, to cause Raine? [Page] Saint Burbe, Thunder: Saint Maturin, a Physician for Fooles: Saint Acuire, for Mad-men: Saint Auertin, for the diseases of the head: Saint Entrope, for the Dropsie: Saint Mammard, for the Paps: Saint Phiacre, for the Emerods: Saint Maine, for the Scabs: Saint Genoa, for the Gowt: Saint Crepine, for Shooes: Saint Medard, for smiling: Saint Iob, for the Pox: Saint Roch, for Coblers: Saint Wendelin, for Shepheards: Saint Pelage, a Neat-herd: Saint Anthony, a Swineherd: Saint Gertrudia, a Rat-catcher: Saint Honore, a Baker: Saint Eloy, a Smith: Saint Hubert, a Hunts-man: Saint Luke, a Painter: Saint Nicholas, a Mariner: Saint George, a Knight: Saint Yue, a Lawyer: Saint Anne for things lost: Saint Leonard, to open Prisons: Saint Feriol, to keepe Geese: Saint Wendalus, to keepe Sheepe: Saint Iohn, to keepe Lambs: Saint Hubert, for Dogges; with infinit others? And is not this fine foolery? or how can there be more palpable grosenesse?

O Sauiour! what shall I now say to such a foolery, as is vnanswerable? whether all our Ladies make one Lady, the Mother of Christ, or not? as Lady of Loretto, Bononia, Wels in Auergue, Aix, Nantuile, Franckucile: the Valley, the Mountaine, Mount-ferra, Mount-guatier, Mount Rowland, Cabimont in Languedoc: Our Lady of the Woods, our Lady of the Fields, of the faire Oake, Walnut-tree, Fountaine: and at Chartres, our Lady aboue and beneath: our Lady of Crotes, or in a Caue: of Carmel, of Snow. What [Page] say you also to our Lady of recouerie, of comfort, of gladnesse, of all ioyes, of pitie, of vertues, of good tidings, of good wishes, and infinit others? but what? all one woman? O blessed Iesu, what absurditie is here?

Doe you thinke it is not worth the laughing at, to obserue the many Masses, wherewith the Friers and Priests maintaine their Gluttony, in ringing, singing, quauering, mumbling, grumbling, and pattering great, little, high, low Masses, with a sop of Wine, & dry Masses; Masses for quick and dead; Masses ad requiem; Masses for all Ladies, pitty, vertue, good newes, and such like: Masses of Saints, Sebastian, Godegran, Guerlichon, Aliuergo, Andoch. Masses for 11000. Virgins: Fraternities, Chanters, Warriers, and such like? Yea, what say ye to the Ornaments? Albe, Stole, Girdle, Maniple, Amist, Cope, Chasible, Platine, Pix, Censour, and many other things?

A Gentleman being reproued for not vailing his Bonet, when the Holy Water was cast on his head; answered, that if it had that vertue to penetrate to Purgatory, it would no doubt goe thorow his Hat well enough.

In Burgandy, neere a Village called Chaseule, a Countryman hearing Ringers, went into the Church, and kneeled before a Crucifix standing neere the Belfry, which fell downe and had almost dashed out his braines, so that the Ringers were faine to leaue worke, to carry him home. Vpon his recouery he comes to the same Church [Page] againe, and findes a yong smiling Crucifix in the place of the old, (for the other was broken in the fall) which looking stedfastly vpon, he could forbeare no longer, but thus began, Cast as good a countenance toward me as thou wilt, I will neuer trust thee. For if thou liue to be a man, thou wilt be as vnhappy as euer was thy father, who would haue kill'd me.

When Pope Leo the tenth was told by his Confessor, that hee needed to feare nothing, considering he had the keyes of heauen, and the treasurie of the Church. He answered in this sort: Thou knowest that he which hath sold a thing, hath no longer right nor interest therein; therefore seeing I haue sold heauen and all to others, I am afraid I shall haue nothing to doe there my selfe.

When Pope Iulius the second cast S. Peters Keyes into Tiber, and tooke Saint Pauls sword, he said alowd, Saint Peters Keyes would stand him in no stead for the Warres, but Saint Pauls sword would helpe him well.

The manner was among the Priests that went a begging for Saint Anthony, to heat their little Crosses, or brazen Images: which when the women came to kisse, and felt it very hot, they would tell them, that S. Anthony was not pleas'd with their Almes, and the poore women so frighted, would returne and fetch better.

There is a Story of Pudding Saint Peter, in the Country of Berry to this purpose. A Priests mayd powred swines bloud into a great Latine Bason, [Page] which had the Image of Saint Peter embossed in it, and whereinto the Curate was wont to put his offrings, as it stood for showe vpon the Altar. Now it happned, that a droppe of the bloud was vnwash't out of it, and so perceiued on S. Peters face: whereupon the Priest rung the Bells, and cryed, A miracle; which caused the neighbour parishes to meete at Procession, had not another enuious Priest discouered the foppery; and so it ended in laughter and ridiculousnes.

11. Concerning their Impieties: I will neither 11. Their impieties. trouble you with the wicked Doctrine of Papists, nor imposturing trumperies of Priests and Friers, touching either the abuse of holy Scripture, or mixture of their owne fancies with the written Word; but shewe you certaine instances and examples, whereby you may see, with what daring hands, worse then Ieroboams arme, they haue reached to pull the good Prophets by the throates: that is to say, what attempts they haue made, both in words and actions, against Christ, and true Religion. Oh let such hand and armes wither, as that wicked Kings did.

The Schoole-men determine, that the Sonne of God might haue assumed any other nature, besides that of Man.

The Idolatrous Gentiles and Aegyptians did not eate those creatures, which they adorned as Gods: and yet Alexander Hales, and Thomas Aquinas will not onely haue men to deuoure their God and Sauiour, like bread, but affirme that [Page] Dogges, and Hogges, Mice, and Birds may eate the true body of Christ.

When the Pope goteh on progresse, Christs body is sent before with the baggage, and when the Pope is neere, then it goeth out to meete him, while all the Gallants of Rome attend on the Pope.

They make Saint Francis, and Dominick, equall to Christ in diuers things; and in some, superiour: For they call Saint Francis, Iesum Tipicum, that is, a figuratiue Iesus, and say plainely, that Dominick and Francis did more Miracles then Christ.

In the conuenticle of Trent, Cornelius, Bishop of Bitonto, said, Papa lux venit in mundum, The Pope the light came into the world: and Simon Begnius, in the Councell of Laterane, called Leo the tenth, The Lion of the tribe of Iuda, and cryed out, Te Leo beatissime, saluatorem expectauimus, that is, We, blessed Leo, haue looked for thee our Sauiour.

Beno the Cardinall sheweth, that Gregorie the seuenth, cast Christs body into the fire, burning the Sauiour of Papists: and so did Pius the fifth, as Catena reports, throwe an Agnus Dei into the flames.

Theoderick shewes plainely, that Vrbane the Pope melted crosses and Images of siluer, to pay souldiers: and thus, that which they pretend to honour as God, they conuert into the seruice of the Diuell.

[Page] Horatius Tersalinus in an Epistle to Peter Aldobrandini, prefixed before the Story of our Lady of Loretto, saith, that God made the Virgin Mary, as much as could be, companion and partaker of his Power and Maiestie, &c. and Bernardinus in Mariali likewise saith, that all graces came downe from God by Mary. And Bonauenture hath transformed the praises and honour of God, set out by the Prophet Dauid, to the Virgin Mary. To conclude, in the Romane Breuiary, she is called dulcis amica Dei, and the happy gate of Heauen: Yea, in the Missas of Sarum, they esteeme of her, as the Sauiour of the world.

Is it not impiety to make a scorne of Christian Religion? Then harken what the Popes thēselues haue done? Iulius the 2. vpon Easter day, fought with the French at Rauenna. Gregory the 7. commanded his Armie to ioyne battell vpon a good Friday, against Henry 4. Emperour, and in Saint Maries Church hee sought to murther him, by throwing downe a stone vpon his head from a Vault with his owne hands. Sixtus 4. by his Agents, at the eleuation of the Sacrament, indeuoured to murther Laurence. And Iulian de Medices, Leo the 10. called the Gospell a Fable. And Cardinall Poole, an inkie Gospel. I could tell you more of Eccius, Piggius, and diuers others: but I will not make your eares glow again with their horrible impieties.

Paulus Aemilius telleth, how the Embassadors [Page] of Sicilia cryed out to the Pope. Thou which takest away the sinnes of the world, haue mercy vpon vs. And Simon Begnius, Bishop of Modrusa, in the Councell of Laterane, calleth Leo the 10. his Sauiour. Stapleton, writing to Gregory the 13. calleth him Supremum numen in terris. Tho: Waldensis, a most ridiculous and impious Frier, conuerteth the words, which the Apostle spake to Christ, to Martin the 5. Domine, salua nos, perimus. Fulbertus, Bishop of Chartres, sayes Rodulphus Niger, was nourished with our Ladies Milke. They tell also blasphemous tales of Alane de rupe, the Author of our Rosary, that he was very familiar with our Lady.

If I should raise this mountaine of impiety with the stories & instances, that I my selfe haue read, it would be too stupendious, and make both you and my selfe amazed, to behold my own handyworke: therefore I will vse contraction, and conclude this Section, with shewing what wicked and impious persons they haue beene, by whose authoritie, and meanes, the Popish religion hath thriued, and receiued supportation.

The principall Agent of the Popes Supremacie was Phocas, a barbarous Thracean, and wicked murtherer: and Bonifacius 3. nothing inferiour vnto him, in nefarious and abominable actions.

Irene, a proud, insolent, and irregular woman, one that murthered her owne sonne, and conspired with Adrian, Bishop of Rome, to perpetrate horrible outrages in the Church of God, brought [Page] in the idolatrous worship of Images and Saints.

Gregory 7. first dissolued by force Priests marriages, and exalted the Miter of the Pope, aboue the crownes of Emperours: Yet Beno testifieth, he was a Necromanticke, a Murtherer, Empoysoner, Sacrilegious, and impious person: yea, the Synode of Brixina condemned him for diuers abominable crimes.

Paschal the second is called an Incendiary, or firebrand of sedition and trouble, setting the sonne against the Father, and the Subiects to oppose their Princes. Thus hauing preuailed against the Emperour, hee denyed his body buriall, and caused the carkasse of Pope Clement to be burned in a triumphant despight.

Alexander the 3. betrayed the Emperour Frederick Barbarossa to the Soldan, and perswaded him to destroy him, hauing yet most proudly trod vpon his neck, with abusing a place of Scripture: Super aspidem, &c.

Innocent 3. first established auricular confession and transubstantiation, raised tumultuous warres in France, caused the bones of Almericus to bee burned for preaching against Images, and shewed himselfe a bloudy deuourer of Christs flock, and zealous Christians.

Honorius the 3. authorized the worship of the Masse-cake, forbade the marriage of Priests, and maintained the filthinesse of Monkes and Friers: his malice so extended against the Scots that had slaine Adam Bishop of Catnes, that hee caused [Page] foure hundred to bee hang'd, and gelded their children, to extinguish their race for euer.

Boniface the 8. Clement 5. Iohn 22. made vp the body of the Canon law; you know, what that meanes. Of the first, it is written, he entred like a Fox; raigned, like a Lyon; dyed, like a Dogge. Of the second, hee was infamous, insolent, and a Lecher. Of the third, Petrarch writeth a whole Sonnet, &c.

Iohn the 23. denied the Immortalitie of the Soule, and was conuinced of Incest, Sodomitry, and Atheisme. And Eugenius the 4. was condemned for an Hereticke, driuen out of the City as a publike enemy by the Romanes, and caused Ladislaus to periure himselfe with the Turke, whereby so many Christians were slaine at Varna.

Paul the 3. Iulius the 3. and Pius the 4. the wicked Authors of the Decrees, and Anathematismes of the Conuenticle of Trent, were such infamous and impious men, that the first was a Parricide, Lecher, Negromancer, and Empoysoner. The second an Epicure, and filthy Sodomite: for Innocentius de monte, a Boy he vsed, was made Cardinall by him. The third died betweene two Concubines, and was odious to the Romanes for his Vices.

I could say much more in this point, & spread a Carpet of such odious filthinesse, that the very steame and ordure would poison you in the opening; and therefore I will cloze it vp for modesties sake. And if any obiect, that heere are a [Page] number of stories recited, almost incredible to be beleeued, without partialitie, or farre-fetcht deuices, I referre them to all their owne Histories, the Sibils, ancient Fathers, their owne Saints; Costerus, Nauclerus, Platina, Herodatus, Scotus, Aquinas, Durandus, Biel, Stapleton, Harding, Bellarmine, Kellison: their Legends, Rosaries, Decretals, Cannon Law, Lombardus, and diuers others, euen the Popes Champions. If you would haue more iustifiable Authors, then you may peruse Bernard in diuers places, Petrarch, Mantuan, Iohn of Salisbury, Warnerus, Theoderick, Iohannes Marius, Robert Grosted, Beno, Matthew Paris, Vergerius, Sleidan, and so many others, that if they now should bee traduced for scandalizing the Church and Religion of Rome, their very bones would rise out of their graues in Iudgement against you, and their now bookes extant in the world would vp and assume life, to defie you to your faces.

12. Last of all, concerning their Simony. The 12. Their Simony. History of Matthew Paris is a very Map, wherein he doth quasi digito demonstrare the Vsury, Symony, Rapi ne, Sacriledge, and vniust gaine, wherewith the Popes inriched their Coffers out of England; yea, he inlargeth the particulars of euery Kings Raigne, insomuch, that speaking of Gregory the 7. he cryes out, that his Agents did vexe the people. And Feline sheweth, that without the rent of Simony, the Church of Rome would come to contempt. For of late dayes they haue erected [Page] diuers Bankes, called Monti de Pieta, as appeareth in Onuphrius in the liues of Iulius the 3. Paul the 4. and Pius the 4. Vrbane the 6. would sell Crosses, Chalices, and Images. Boniface the 9. would bargaine for money for Benefices, and when it was scarce, take Pigs, Cattel, and Wares, which his Agents should vent out againe. I will not talke of Masses, Sacraments, Pardons, Indulgences & such like: but tell you what they say in Spaine, and that in a Rime, Es el primero ganor dinero: and for the person of the Pope—Todo parami, nada para Vos.

There is a saying of Alexander the 6.

Vendere iure potest, emerat ille prius.

Benet the 9. sold the papacy for 1500. pounds of gold, to Gregory the 6. And no man obtaineth that place, but for great summes of money, and larger promises, as the discourses of the Conclaues testifie, and Bene writeth at large.

Briget in her Reuelations saith, that the Pope hath turned all Gods commandements into one, and that is, Dapecuniam.

But Mantuan hath it thus:—Venalia nobis,

Templa, Sacerdotes, altaria, sacra, coronae,

Ignis, thura, preces, Calum est venale, Deus (que)

Frederick the 2. for one absolution paid to Gregory the 9. 125000. ounces of gold, as the Pontificall, Nanclere epitome rerū Germ. Iohn of Pineda, and others doe reckon.

Leo the 10. brought such a scandall vpon the sale of Indulgences in Germany, as comming then to Magdalene the Popes honest Sister, that all the [Page] Country was mooued, and complained thereof: But Theoderick testifieth in his booke, that Boniface the ninth sold benefices as he was hearing of Masse: and Theoderick Trudo hath a pretty complaint, That Christs sheep-folds were broken downe with hammers of siluer.

The time of Henry 3. in England was so deplored of the Emperour, that hee reprehended the King, for suffering his Country to bee so shamefully empouerished by the Pope: For Mathew Paris writes, that at one time they had as much money out of England, as remained there; except Church ornaments, Plate, and Iewels, &c. yea, Bonner in his preface to Gardiners Booke De vera obedientia, saies plainly, That the Popes spoiles did equall the Kings reuennues.

Lewis the 9. of France, in his Pragmatical sanction, not onely complaineth of the Popes exactions, but absolutely forbideth them. Whereupon the Uniuersitie of Paris, in an appeale from Leo the tenth, taxeth the insatiable Auarice of the Court of Rome, as drawing from thence 2500000. crownes a yeere; confounding lawes and Cannons, by expectatiues, and reseruations, and vpon pretence of diuers faculties comming from thence.

Iames Arch-Bishop of Ments payed diuers summes of money for his Pall: and Valla made a treatise against the forged deuotion of Constantine; accusing the Pope, for selling the gifts of the holy Ghost: wherein he did worse then Verres, [Page] or Cateline, or any robber of the common treasure. But Theoderick compares the Popes exchecquer to the Sea, into which all Riuers runne, and yet it runnes not ouer: yea, he sayeth plainely, that the Popes officers were so many tormentours of Hell, to scourge the people. Alan Chartier testifies, that Gods Sanctuarie was a common market place for the sale of benefices. Iohn of Salsburie cries out, that the Pope became intolerable, & delighted in the spoiles of the Church: Vespergēsis affirmeth, that all men sought to Rome for dispensation of offences, and were released for money. But Iohannes Andreas goes further, exclaiming that Rome was founded by robbers, and yet retaineth a sent of her first liquor; as if hee should say, Quo semel est imbuta recens, seruabit odorem, pesta diu. I could here also recite the 100. grieuances of [...], the sayings of Albericus à Rosato: the complaints of Iohannes Petrus de Ferrara: and that Pretrach calleth her Lanata Babylonia.

But if I now should tell you, after all this getting of wealth, and amassing of treasure, their pride and sumptuousnes in the spending of the same, you would be amazed and wonder, with what spirit they durst iustifie such sacrilegios, vanity, and vnparaleld magnificence; wherein Princes come short of their Regality. Baptista Fulgosius recordeth, of one Peter Riarus, at first a Frier minorite, that being created Cardinall by Pope Sixtus 4. he had his Gownes of cloth of gold; the [Page] Couerings and Tikes of his bed of the same, and all other furniture of the best Silke. At Rome hee made a Feast to Elenor of Arragon, as shee was going to marry the Duke of Ferrara, called Hercules de Est, which lasted seuen houres with great varietie and pompous playes, and liued in that excesse of Voluptuousnesse and cost, that all Italy admired his wealth.

Another had a Concubine called Tiresia, and kept her publikely with shooes set with Pearle and precious Stones: but this is common, and the Cardinals at this houre glory in such excesse.

A Franciscan of Millane, called Sanson, had so enriched himselfe by Bribery, Simony, Sacrilege, and other exactions, that hee offered 120000. dukats for the Popedome: but this kinde of life and expences is so customary in Rome, that I need insist on no further particulars, especially, the maintaining of Curtezans, which name had originall from the courtlinesse and maiestie of the Cardinals; so that you shall read, that in the time of Paul the 5. which was then esteem'd a time of restraint, there were but 45000. notorious Curtezans in Rome. But what need I goe so farre as Rome for wealthy Prelates, when wee had in England in the time of Henry the 5. a Bishop of Winchester, who lent the King 20000. pound Sterling to goe into France? In the time of Rich. the 1. a Bishop of Durham able to buylan Earledome. In the time of Henry 6. Cardinall Beuford, worth aboue 200000. Sterling. In the time of Henry the 8. a [Page] Cardinall Wolsey, exceeding all the Prelates of Europe, for wealth and magnificence. And in the time of Queene Mary, a Cardinall Poole, one of the sumptuous subiects of the world.

The Conclusion.

NOw ye Lords, that entertaine these Priests with familiar imbraces, and admit them to your Tables and Closets, as if you would rely vpon the Verdict of some Oracle; whereas yet in other Countreys they are euen derided of their best Supporters: Now ye Ladies, that in a manner hang about their necks with admiration, as if you were to runne to touch the hemme of Christs garment, supposing all sanctitie and piety to bee the ornaments of their hypocrisie: Now see, Gentiles, that are so easily seduced with imposturing cunning of dissimuled holinesse, and wil not beleeue the incantation of Syrens, whose end is destruction, or to deuoure your soules: Now yee people, that are transported with vaine apparitions, and gew-gaw superstition, to please the naturall man with pastime, and trumperies; seeing these things are so, which I haue recited, being not the tenth of that which I could enlarge: May I not well say to you, as S. Paul said to the Galatians, O ye Fooles, who hath bewitched you? What a Pope doe you adore? The Man of sinne, the sonne of perdition, the Whore of Babylon, the Beast with seuen heads, and ten Horns, &c? What Priests and Prelates doe yee entertaine, that will [Page] leade you from the pure Waters of Shiloa, where you may wash and be cleane without money, into the durty puddles of filthinesse, where yet you must be at great expences, to purchase monstrous deformitie?

What doctrine doe you make much of, of darknesse and pollution, which cannot endure the sunny splendour of the Word of God; so that without controuersie, if the blind lead the blind, both fall into the Ditch, and in the end you shall bee so besmeared with the deuices of wicked Traditions, that neither Culanais, nor a thousand Riuers of Oyle shall make you cleane?

Returne therefore betimes, I beseech you, to Wisedomes Feast, to the balme of Gilead: to bring in the Arke, and to re-edifie Ierusalem. Oh, returne, returne, I say, for Gods sake, for Christs sake, for Religions sake, for your owne soules sakes, that you may see the difference betweene the bloudy Scarlet Robes of the Cardinals, and the innocent white garments of the Saints. That ye may heare the voice of, Come ye blessed; and, not, Goe you cursed: And that you may come before the Lambe, freely with the signature of righteousnesse and repentance, and not at all bee beholding to Saint Peter, and his Keyes, which I dare sweare are not yet found, since the Pope cast them into Tyber.

A Ioue surgit opus.

FINIS.

Information about this book

Title statement

The friers chronicle: or, The true legend of priests and monkes liues

T. G., fl. 1623.

Edition statement

1623

Publication

Publisher

Text Creation Partnership,

Place of publication

Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) :

Date

2003-07 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1).

ID [DLPS]

A01391

ID [STC]

STC 11511

ID [STC]

ESTC S117209

ID [EEBO-CITATION]

99852424

ID [PROQUEST]

99852424

ID [VID]

17747

Availability

This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal. The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission.

Series

Early English books online.

Notes

(EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A01391)

Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 17747)

Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1475-1640 ; 1137:15)

Source

— The friers chronicle: or, The true legend of priests and monkes liues, T. G., fl. 1623., Gainsford, Thomas, d. 1624?, attributed name., Goad, Thomas, 1576-1638, attributed name..

Extent

[72] p.

Printed for Iohn Budge: and are to be sold at his shop in Pauls Churchyard, at the signe of the Greene Dragon,. London :: 1623.. (Dedication signed: T.G., i.e. Thomas Gainsford? Thomas Goad?.) (Signatures: A-I⁴.) (A variant of the edition with R. Mylbourne's name in the imprint.) (Reported in STC, but not found in Folger catalogue.) (Reproduction of the original in the University of Chicago. Library.)

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